POULTRY and Dairy Produce f til kinds wintod. Write "for Mr. - CASH OFFER Pearson-Page Co. TSESS? SECOND-HAND MACHINERY Bourht, sold and ftxctmnred: nrlnM, boilers, sawmills, etc. snd for stock Lift and Prices. THE J. E. MARTIN CO.. U 1st St,. Portland. Or. 1887 TO 19t4 27 th I TEAR OLMES BUSINESS COLLEGE V Th Khool that rts yon rood position. Thousands of Graduates v NONB IDLE - I I At aw FREE INFORMATION I ULUC5I WuhinrtonssilOUlSts. I .MOST PORTLAND. ORE. I fflUUtrtri Mother Wouldn't Take Any. : Col. J. Slocum Rldgeley, In' answer ing tbe toast "To Mother" at a ban quet In Charlottesville, said: "God bless Anna Jarvis, the Phila delphia woman who put Mothers' day on tbe map! That holy day Is better for us than 10 new South American rivers. "Let me tell you a 'mother' story. "In my youth, when I was teaching school in Biloam, I said one morning to a bright little fellow: "'Tommy, my boy, if a family con sisting of father, mother and six chil dren should have a cherry pie for din ner how much would each receive?' '"A seventh," the little fellow an swered. " 'Carefully,' said I. 'Remember, there are eight people.' "'Yes, sir, I know,' said Tommy, 'but mother wouldn't take any for fear the others wouldn't have enough.'" New Orleans States. . . HOWARD K. BTOTOM - Aunn mud CsHntut, Leuclville, Colorudo, SpwiiDioii brioMt field. Silver. Ld. II. Mold. Silver. Jill; Sold Woi Zln. or Cuppor, It Mniilas mvelopM s id (all price list sent on appDcNtioii, Control end Dmptro workov Uoltod. Seferanoei OirbonstelfotloDml Bonk. A Wartime Fable. ' Once upon a Time a Big Boy walked up to a Little Boy and asked him for a Piece of Pie. The Little Boy refus ed, whereupon the Big Boy started to trounce Him. The little Boy, bow ever, inflicted a mighty Beating upon the Big Boy. Rubbing his Bruises, the Big Boy smiled and said: "Little Boy, give me your Pie now and I won't fight you Any More." But the Little Boy held the Pie and the Big Boy had to go Somewhere Else for Some thing Else but Pie. Moral Sometimes you can get by diplomacy what you can't by fighting and then again, sometimes you can't, If you do the fighting first. Putnam Fadeless Dyes are the easiest to use. Not an Omission. Mrs. Benton tasted the savory mor sel she had carefully compounded In the chafing dish and looked at her husband somewhut apprehensively. Then she said: "Somehow It don't taste Just as Mrs. Mink's did tho other night. Yet I thought I remembered the recipe all right. I suppose I must have left something out." Mr. Benton tasted reflectively. "I don't think so," he remarked. MrB. Benton's face brightened vis ibly. Then her husband continued: "There's nothing you could leave out," he said, "that would make it taste like this. It's something you've put In!" New York Globe. ' '' For 75 years Wright's Indian Vege. .table Pills have been their own recom mendation In conditions of upset stom ach, liver and bowels. If you have not tried them, a tost now will prove tbelr benefit to you Send for free sample to 872 Pearl St., New York. Adv. In the Realms of Credit. "When I left home as a lad," Bald Mr. UuBtln Stax, "I had $10 In my pocket," "You'll never forgnt that day." V "No sir. It's the only time I have felt that I could Bottle up on. a mo ment's notice and be absolutely sure my assets would cash in for more than my liabilities." Washington Star. PARIS TO RAZE . OWN SUBURBS Residences in Way of Forts to Be Destroyed. ' Invading German Army Hopeful of Penetrating Lines Before ' Russians Reach Berlin. ' - .. .-. '-'V YOUH OWN nmiOfJlST Wilt TELl YOU Ttj Uurhie Kye Uciml,v for KU, Weuk, Watery K.WS And Grauulikted Eyelid; No Hiiiurtlug- . llist.Kye Uumfm t. Write for Book, or the iy by wsiHTros. Murine liyr Uemeuy Co., Ciik'ugo. Waiting. "Is anybody waiting on you, mad em?" Inquired the shopwalker. "Yea, sir," returned the middle-aged matron, fiercely, -"I reckon they're waitln' to see If I won't go away with out stayln' for the threepence-halfpenny in change that's owin' to me." TltBlts. May Migration. , "Shakespeare speaks of moving ac cidents by field and flood." "Well, I Buppose like most poets ha had to move frequently and probably had a good" many ..accidents to what little furniture be owned." ThoSturatlon Point. "How are you fixed financially, old man?" , "I'm at the saturation point." "What do you mean?" "At the point where I've got to soak something." Bostou Transcript Reasonable Argument. ' Road Cop You say that's your car? Tattered wretches like you don't own cars! Seedy Driver I bought It five yearn ago, and haven't bad the price of a suit Bince, "" ... . , SUCCESS- Depends Upon Your Training , Our roartM In Shorthand, Pn. triftnihip, HuiintM TrminUif and . Tcifwiiphr will quip you (or a uccwvful tniiinvM ctrr, ' FALL TERM BKPTKMHKR T. BUSINESS) COLLEGE. Fourt 8 met, Nov MorrloM, P.rtla.4, Or. We Guar in tee Positions for All Our Graduates. . Writs Us, No Trouble to Answer. r. n. u. NO. it, 114 WHEN vtMiw to sArertlosn, Imm I lira this r. ' Paris It is officially announced that the military governor has ' ordered all residents of the zone within action of the city's 'defending forts to evacuate and destroy their houses within four days from August 81. . As far as can be learned, the French troops appear to be intact, except for those losses which were inevitable in a week's heavy fighting over a vast front. If the British and French retire on the western flank, it is explained that they do so in order to choose their ground for fiercer resistance. Every new day has seen reinforcements mov mg up to aid the French troops engag' ed on the Belgian frontier. .... . The French operating along the in terior lines are able to shift an army corps from one part of the frontier to another swiftly, and it is said that the allies probably are in stronger position than last Sunday. The Germans, apparently owing to the increasing pressure of Russia, seem to be throwing themselves against intrenched positions and are suffering severely. They are gaining ground and seemingly are hopeful of being able to break through before Berlin is invested. French wounded are arriving at the provincial towns. " ' : RICHARD HARDING DAVIS, WRITER, ARRESTED AS SPY London Only by exceptionally good fortune was the life of Richard Hard ing Davis, special war correspondent, spared by the Germans, who suspected him of bemg'a spy, according to the story told Dy James K. Evans, an American engineer, who arrived from Brussels which plifce he left Thursday night. - For hours the Germans debated whether to shoot Mr. Davis, who had followed in the wake of the German advance. He was some distance south of the Belgian capital when taken into custody by the German officers. Germany's Naval Loss Off Heligoland Is 670 London Twenty-nine killed and 38 wounded was the price in men paid by the British for the naval action against the Germans , in Heligoland waters Friday. An official statement issued here says that of 1000 men composing the crews of the warships sunk off Heligo land, only 830 were saved. - The British losses are described as follows: ' "The ' light ' cruiser Arethnsa lost Lieutenant Eric .Westmacott and nine men killed, four seriously wounded, ana Lieutenant Kobinson and 11 men wounded, but not seriously. "The torpedo-boat destroyer Liberty lost commander Bertellot and six men killed, one . man ' has since died from wounds, one dangerously wounded, five seriously wounded and 'five slightly wounded. I "The destroyer Laurel suffered ten men killed, one has since . died of his wounds, ; two men dangerously wound ed, seven seriously wounded and two slightly wounded. London Paper Holds Up' America as Good Example London The Daily News, In an ed itorial denouncing secret diplomacy says: "Can Europe ever again tolerate the appalling peril of secret diplomacy? Can we ever again play about on the deck with sails and compasses, making our little laws and 'imagining that we are self-governing, while down In the hold of our ship of state there is a powder magazine, the existence of which we are not permitted to know?, "Secret diplomacy belongs to the traditions of autocratic and personal government. It has no place in a democratic world, and the example of the United -States must become the model of the civilized world on this vital matter, if Europe Is to be free from menace in the! future." Czar Lauds Scot Grey. London The official press bureau has issued the following notice: . "His Majesty the Emperor of Rus sia, who is colonel In chief. of the Scots Greys, has sent , the following gracious message to his regiment: 'I am happy to think that my gallant regiment, the Royal Scots Greys, is fighting with Russia against the com mon enemy. Convinced 'that they will uphold the gracious traditions of the past, ,1 send them my warm greetings and wish them victory in the battle." ". V . NORTHWEST MARKET 9 REPORTS.' ' Brussels Force Reduced. London OneTiumlred and sixty rail way trains loaded with German troops have passed through Belgium from the southwest toward the northeast, ac cording to an Antwerp dispatch to the Heuter Telegram company. This, it Is added, indicates that the Germans are sending troops back on account of the advance of the Russians. The German force at Brussels has been re duced to minimum. These 160 trains, which passed through, the dis patch continues,, are transporting one army corps with full equipment. King Mingles) With Troops. -London According to the Antwerp correspondent of the Daily News, King Albert constantly mingles with his troops, and was In ' the trenches In the fighting around Malines. He was al ways at the points of the greatest danger, assisting the encouraging the men. He went among them attired simply as a soldier, and his sympathe tic conduct had a remarkable effect. Portland. t Portland All cereals are advancing in price, with wheat leading the pro cession. At the Merchants' Exchange sessions bids of $1.12, an advance of 2 cents, were made for bluestem, with sellers asking $1.13 and $1.14. Club was bid up to 93 J cents, red Russian was half a cent Higher at 93 cents and red fife a cent higher at 93J cents. Buyers and sellers could not get to gether, and no business was transacted at the session. - . The interior wheat markets Were very strong, with country millers com peting sharply against Coast buyers and farmers, as a rule, holding for still higher prices. For two days farmers in the Big Bend section have been receiving $1 net for their blue stem, while at Walla Walla a sale was made at $1.07. Club wheat sold on the Sound at 951 cents. ' California is in the market for wheat of all kinds and full prices are being offered. During the past month ship ments south have been large, amount ing to 471,305 bushels from Portland, Flour shipments from here to Califor nia In August were 40,171 barrels, and the Sound sent 76,955 barrels down. Barley prices were quoted unchanged on (all at $24.60 for feed and $25. for brewing. The San Francisco barley market advanced sharply, December closing at $1,254, against $1.22 on Saturday, and the May option at $1.82i, as compared With $1.28 Satur day. . Eastern demand for Oregon and Washington barley is reported here. A $6 rate on barley is announced from Portland to New York via the Canal. Millfeed Spot prices: Bran, $25 25.60 per ton; shorts, $28.50; rolled barley, $23.6024.60. " Corn Whole, $37 per ton; cracked, $38. Hay Old timothy, Eastern Oregon, $15(8)16; now crop timothy, valley, $12.5013; grain hay, $810; alfal fa, $1I12. - Eggs Fresh Oregon ranch, case count, 28c; candled, 30c. ;- Poultry Hens, 1414gc: 'sp, ingB, 15ffil6c: turkeys, 22c; dressed, choice. 25c; ducks, 1015c; geese, 10c. ' Butter Creamery prints, extras, 86c per pound; cubes, 81c; storage, 282Sic Pork Block, 12,e per pound. Veal Fancy, 1314c per pound. Vegetables Cucumbers, 60c per box; eggplant, 8c per pound; peppers, 67Jc per -pound; artichokes, $1 per dozen; tomatoes, 2550c 'per crate; cabbage, lJ2e per pound; peas, 6 6c; beans, 46c; corn, $l1.25,per sack ; celery, 6085c per dozen. unions Yellow, $1.25 per sack. Green Fruits Apples, new, 75c $1.75 per box; cantaloupes, 25c$1.25 per crate ; peaches, 2075c per box ; plums, 50c$l; watermelons, 8090c perewt. ; casabas, $1.602 per dozen; pears, 50c$l per box; grapes, 75c $1.50 per crate. Potatoes Oregon, $1.35 per sack. Receipts at the Portland Union Stockyards in August were unusually heavy, the total run being "4855 head greater than in the same month last year. The largest gain, as has been the case every month this year, was in the hog division, where the Increase was 4013 head. Cattle Prime steers, $6.757; choice, $6.606.76; medium, $6.25 6.50; choice cows, $5. 76(8:6; medium, $5.25 5.75; heifers, $5.60 6.60; calves, $6(0)8.50; bulls, $34; stags, $4.505.75. Hogs Light, $99.25; 'heavy, $8 8.25. Sheep Wethers, $4(3)5.26; ewes, $3.604.35; lambs, $o6. Seattle. Seattle Predicting that Elberta peaches will sell down to 26c per box next week, the street is preparing to meet the heaviest volume of this fruit since the opening of the season. Not withstanding that the stock has been pouring in all week, jobbers have bat tled to get the best prise possible -for the grower, but to little purpose. Do mestic canning operations, which sank to a minimum since sugar began to mount upward, has paralzyed profits to the producer. With the main avenues of consumption closed, the surplus has been thrown back into the local trade, and demoralization was Inevitable. Should there be another season like this, many growers declare they will cut down their trees. Eggs Select ranch, 3536c per dozen. Poultry Live hens, - 1015c per pound; old roosters, 9c; 1914 broilers, 1 Hid 5c; ducklings, 1012c; , geese, 10c; guinea fowl, $9 per dozen. Dressed Pork 810c per pound. Dressed veal Small, 12- 184c pound; large, 812c, Ranch butter 16c per pound. Apples New cooking, 6085c box; new eating, $i,251.50; Gravensteins, $l(fill.25. ' v : Blackberries $1 crate. Cantaloupes Ponies, 60c crate; standards, 76 Crabapples 60c$1.25 box. Grapes Malaga, $1.10 crate; To kay, $1.60; Concords, 80c. 1 Huckleberries 78c pound. Pears Bartlett, 75c$1.25 box. , Peaches 30(40c crate. Dressed beef Prime beef steers, 12 (Ti:12Jc pound; cows, lli12c; heif ers, 12c Dressed Hogs Whole, packing house, 13c pound. -Dressed spring lamb 1213c lb. Dressed mutton 910c pound. Beets New, $1.25 sack. ' Cabbage Local,' $1 sack. Corn Green, $1.251.50 sack. Carrots Local, $1 sack. 11 Cauliflower Local, $1(81.26 dozen. Cucumbers Hothouse, 35$76c dot. Lettuce Local, 40c dozen. Potatoes Local $1.25 per hundred. Tomatoes Local, 25t40c crate. Artichokes 76(85 dozen. Bell peppers California, 20-lb. box es, $1; Wenatchee, 10-lb. boxes, 60 60c. Celery Local, 40(i50c dozen. Onions Green, 25(f30&dozen; Cali fornia, red and yellow, lie pound; Walla Walla, $1.16 hundred. Parsley 25c dozen. Radishes Local, 15c doz. bunches. Spinach Local, 75e Crate. Siiuash Local, 2c pound. Turnips New, white, $1.15 sack. WOMEN 17110 ARE ALWAYS TIRED May Find Help in Thia Letter; Swan Creek, Mich. " I cannot speak too highly of your medicine. When ij through neglect or overwork I get run down and-my appe tite is poor and I have that weak, lan guid, always tired feeling, I get a bot tle of Lydia E. Pink ham's -Vegetable Compound, and it builds me up, gives me strength, and re stores me to rerfect health again. It is truly a great bless ing to women, and I cannot speak too highly of it. I take pleasure in recom mending it to others." Mrs. Annib Cameron, R.F.D.. No. 1, Swan Creek, Michigan, . Another Sufferer Relieved. Hebron, Me. "Before taking voor remedies l was all run down, discour aged and had female weakness. I took Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com pound and used the Sanative Wash, and find today that I am an entirely new woman, ready and willing to do my housework ntw, where before taking your medicine it was a dread. I try to impress upon .the minds of all ailing women I meet the benefit they can derive Ironvyour medicines." Mrs. Charles Rowe. R. F. D., No.1, Hebron, Maine;, If yon want special advice write to Lydia E. Pinkham Med icine Co (confidential) Lynn, Mass. Tour letter wil be opened, read and answered by a woman and held In strict confidence. , His Needs. A bachelor wanted a man servant, v he Inserted an advertisement in a local weekly. One of the applicants Who answered was an Irishman. 1 "What I want," explained the bache lor, "is a useful man one who can cook, drive a motorcar, look after a pair of horses, clean shoes and win dows, feed poultry, milk the cow and do a little painting and paper hang ing." "Excuse me, sor," said Murphy, "but what kind of soil have ye here?" "Soil?" snapped the bachelor. "What's that got to do with it?" "Well, I thought if It was clay I might make bricks in me spare time." Philadelphia Record. 8unllght Intensified By Reflection from Ocean Beaoh and Desert Sand, unrelieved bv Foliaee. Winds Latid Mineral Laden. PoiBonous Dust, all Dnng jiye irouoies in ineir waice uranu- latea eyelids, Kea, itching, jiuming, urea and Watery Eyes, Irnpaired Vision and Eya Pain. Reliable Relief is found in Murine Eye Remedy, Mild and Harmless. If you Wear Glasses, Try Murine. Doesn't 3mart. Feels Fine. Acts Quickly. Is an Rive Tonic compounded by Oculists not a ' Patent Medicine" but used in successful Physicians' Practice for many years. Now dedicated to the Public and sold at 50c Per Bottle. Murine Eye Salve in Aseptio Tubes, 25c and 60c. Sold by Druggists. For Books, write to Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago. ' Of Course. Barney Phelan, Father Healey's ser vant, was celebrated for his ready wit One day, while he was serving at din ner, one of the guests said to him: "Barney, why is my ankle placed be tween my calf and my foot?" "Begorra, I dunno," replied Barney, "unless it Is to keep your calf from eatin' your corn." Boston Transcript. Comparative Values. Willie Paw, what is the difference between genius and talent? Paw Talent gets paid every Satur day, my son. Cincinnati Enquirer. , Its Place. She My dear, I'd like you to book an order for a $50 hat. He All right, my dear; I'll do it in my dream book. Baltimore American. Catty. Nell Miss Prim was In a very scornful mood. When she spoke, she juried her lips. Belle Well, that is more than she )an do with her hair. Baltimore American. , Sick of It. Tell me not in mournful numbers Of the carnage of tbe strife; Tell me who will take the honors When the world series Is rife! Helping Kidneys By Clearing Blood A. Function Greatly Assisted By a Weil-Known Remedy. ' afnur nmderf will IS lntnrtjMf & mam .tarty utitltraUsd why ulyi of urlnt ii io Important. In the b of 8. 8. 8. to purify the blood, Ha action Ii a stimulant to tut myriad of flu blood yeaatlt that nak up tha construct lr tiamtea of tha kldneya. All the blood from all orer tht body muat paaa through tha kidney. They let aa tatra and aayeiii. And according to what tixtj allow to pas out In the urine, both aa to quantity aud uaterlala, tha Benito of tha kldneva and tha quality of tha lood la drttrnilned. Tha catalytic energy forced bv k H. & la shown In the urine. It la also demonstrated In tha akin. And la tha Mood conumiea to aweep throush tha ktdneya the dominating nature of ft. 8. actlnf aa tt doea through all the ivenuea of elimination, ahowa a narked lecreaae of dteeas manlfeatatlona aa dta snstrated by urine analyala. Thta aaHt ince la a jrreat relief to the kldneya. The fcody wait re are njore arcnty distributed to tha emanctortve; their elimination la stim ulated by the tonic action afforded the ItTer, tune, akin and kldneya. Thus. In raaea of rheumatism, cretltts, chronic aore throat, hmklneea of voice, bronohitta, asth ma and the myriad of other reflex tndioa ttbtta of weak kidney action, first purify your blood with S. S, ao It will enable the ttaatie to rebuild the cellular atreuifth and regain the normal health. M, . 8. la nreraitHl be Te Swift BoeelBe On.. ft?T ftwtrt Itldtr.. Atlanta. Oa.. and If you have atir d'ep-tteated or obnttaate blood trouble, writ, io Ult'U UuUlca. itet lur Cra advic. Tires at efore-War Prices Goodyear Prices It is Folly Today to Pay More 30 x 3 Plain Tread 30x3'i " '" -34x4 " " 36x4'2 " .- -37x5 " " $11.70 15.75 - 24.35 35.00 41.95 There exists now a new, compelling reason for buying Goodyear tires. It re sults from War conditions. These leading tires built of extra-fine rubber, in the same way as always are selling today at June prices. ' You will firfd today a very wide differ ence between most tire prices and Good years. ' - . Due to Quick Action Early in August when war begnn the world's rubber markets seemed closed to us. : Rubber prices doubled almost over night"''-. ,' - Men could see no way to pay for rubber abroad, and no way to bring it in. We, like others in that panic were forced to higher prices. But we have since, gone back to prices we charged before the war, and this is how we did it: J We had men in London and Singapore when the war broke out. The larger part of the world's rubber supply comes through there. We cabled them to buy up the pick of the rubber. They bought before the advance-1,500,000 pounds of the finest rubber there. Nearly all this is now on the way to us. : And it means practically all of the extra grade rubber obtainable abroad. Today we have our own men in Colom bo, Singapore and Para. Those are the world's chief sources of rubber. So wc are pretty well assured of a constant sup ply, and our pick of the best that's pro duced. " - We were first on the ground. We were quickest in action. As a result, we shall soon have in storage an almost record supply of this extra grade of rubber. . And we paid about June prices. Now Inferior Grades Cost Double About the only crude rubber available now for' many makers is inferior. In ordinary times, the best tire makers refuse it. Much of it had been rejected. But that -"off. rubber" now sells for 'much more than we paid for the best. " The results are these: , Tire prices in general am far in advance of (ioodyears. And many tire makers, short of supplies, will be. forced to use second-grade rubber. ' Be Careful Now ' In Goodyears we pledge you the same grade tire as always. And that grade won for Goodyears the top place in Tiredom the largest sale in the world. And, for the time being, our prices are the same as before the war. We shall try to keep them there. : We accept no excessive orders, but dealers will be kept supplied. And we charge them, until further notice, only ante-bellum prices. That means that Goodyears the best tires built are selling way below other tires. . , iiOODpYEAR . &S AKRON.OHI9 No-Rim-Ciit Tires With All-Weather Treads or Smooth Remembers. Flora Temple. Spectators at tie United shoe ma chinery trial yesterday In the United States district court enjoyed the re partee between Judge Putnam and Frederic P. Fish of counsel for tho defense, says a Philadelphia paper. At torney Fish was arguing on the patent question involved in the anti-trust suit against the United company, and as a means of illustrating a point re marked: "You can put a race horso In 'a plow and you can put a plow horse In a race." .- Here Judge Putnam Interrupted to Bay: "Flora Temple was a plow horse." "Yes," responded Attorney Fish, "hut Bhe soon got out of it I remem ber seeing her in a box car at Taun ton." - , ' "Why, I didn't think you were that old," replied Judge Putnam. "Oh, Lord," replied Attorney Fish, "you don't know what an old fellow I am. I remember Flora Temple well, and I know what her time was, 'too. It waB 2:27." ' By this time the whole courtroom full ot lawyers and spectators was In roars of laughter, and Judges .Dodge and Brown, sitting with Judge Put nam, Joined In the merriment. Cat Trees Peanut-Thief 8qulrrel. : Policemen are reputed to have a penchant for fruit-stand peanuts, but the Judiciary square squirrels cause the Greek who conducts the store op posite City hall the most anguish, as they, are a thieving lot. Hourly they cross the street on foraging expedi tions, but one nearly came to grief, says an exchange. The squirrels became so bold in preying on the peanuts that the Greek recently Installed a large cat as guard Ian of the stand. While the cat appar ently was snoozing on the shady side of the stand an unsuspecting squirrel slipped up. The feline leaped and so did the little thief, the latter up a small tree. I For nearly tWo hours the terrified squirrel hung on a limb with Thomas keeping a sharp vigil below. A fox terrier came along about noon and drove puss into the store. The squir rel snatched a peanut and ran hack to -the park In triumph. DEALING IN FUTURES. - Mr. i Acker That's right; calculat ing how much you have spent on your spring outfit, are you T . ' Mrs. Acker (calmly) I am making up my , appropriation for summer dresses and hats. An Innocent Victim. "This food problem is something aw 'ful!" exclaimed the querulous man: "Still harping on the high cost of llvlngr ? - . "No. My wife has decided to re Iduce her weight.' I wouldn't care what 'food cost If she would only consfent to 'buy It." . , ..;... . Hopeless. V "Is there any public man who rcslly meets with your full approval?" asked the weary listener. .. y : "No," replied Mr. Growcher; "years ago I gave up trying to decide which man I liked most I went ahead and voted for the one who displeased me least" Sam's Idea. "Sam!" -"Yes, boss." 'y "I read In the paper today that an electric burglar alarm has been adapt ed for tho chicken coop. - What do you think of that?" "Why, I sees in dat, boss, a blow at de liberties ot de people!" Getting Him Located. "Did you ever play poker In Crim son Gulch before?", asked Three Fln gor Sam. , ' . "Only once," replied the stranger, "and then I played only for fun." . J'l recollect you. You're one ol those fellows who can't have any fun unless they win everything In sight She Was On. ' He had left her between the acts, saying he had to "see a man." "Well, and how Iff John?" she asked when he returned. "John! John who?" ' ' "John Barleycorn, of course," she r piled. Boston Evening Transcript - Accounting for the Hair. ' Bill I see horsehair is said to maks a substitute for rubber In the manU' facture of automobiletires. Jill Perhaps that gave the landlady the idea that If she put some In the butter it -would make the butter go around farther. , Any Time. ' Nell EJjza went to an astrologer to find out when was tbe best time to get married. : , , Stell What did he tell her? Nell He took one look at her and told her to grab her first chance. Judge. v Social Simile. -"Bllgglns is always talking about his family .tree." "Yes," replied Miss Cayenne. A family tree Is like the ordinary tree. The twig that is farthest from th main root does the most fluttering." -' Athletic Vocalization." "Is a ventriloquist a person who throws bis voice?" asked Mr. Lobrow. "So to speak.". y "Well, we've got one next door. She hasn't thrown It yet. but she Is giving it a terrible struggle." It Is said that a hair from the tall of the horse Is the strongest single animal thread known. Rajium may cause as well as cure cancer In human beings, according to an English physician. . Heroult, the French scientist, who made aluminum commercially valu able, died recently at Paris. A new flrebucket Is equipped with an automatic device which announces that It Is empty when the contents evaporate. ',- Mora than 409 ,p tents hav bees Issued by the United. States for de vices Intended tq harness the power ot sea waves, . ' London scientists are Investigating a rare mineral found In rocks In Wales that radiates a taint light In IU natural state. Tha Chinese government la tend ing students to the Philippines to study scientific forestry under tha insular government , At 500 feet below the surface of the water the amount of Illumination Is about the same as that on the surface on a clear but moonless night Two Austrian engineers have In vented a process for casting false toeth In metal, by which the neces sary uniform density la obtained. The development of powerful and reliable aeroplane motors has enabled French aviators to do most ot their most daring flying with monoplanes with a wing spread of not mora than 26 teet . , Stevtnson's Novel tor Films. London was startled tha other day by the appearance In Fleet street and the Strand of an eccentrically attired young man who distributed souvenirs oa his Journey. Although the public has nearly begun to regard every lit tle street sensation aa arranged lnten Uonally tor the pictures, it took the by standers some time to discover that the youth wsa only IrapersonaUng a member of the "Suicide Club." This novel by Robert Louis Stevenson Is be ing Aimed. Floaters. Church I see that Philadelphia's harbor policemen all weigh 200 pounds or more, and none of them can swim. Gotham Oh, well, if they weigh that, much they ought to be able to float, all right y; i Would Have Maoe Good Picture. Judging from accounts In the Los Angeles papers, Marguerite Loverldge Is not exactly lacking in pluck. When she and her suiter discovered a bur glar In the house Marguerite seized a revolver and, crawling to the door ol the room where tbe crook was prowl ing about took a pot shot at him. Of course, she didn't score a bull's-eye. but nevertheless the thief tumbled backward out of the window with an alacrity calculated to fill the best ot "beavtes" with envy. Too bad there was no picture taken ot tha Incident Inductive and Deductive. Deductive reasoning la from the ory to facts, while Inductive reasoning is from facta to theory. DeducUon la sometimes mere dreaming, oftentimes very foolish dreaming (as In the cas of medieval scholasticism), while In duction Is the sane reaching out from, particular facts to general laws (aa In the case ot modern science). Most1 of the things that have cursed man kind have come as tbe result of de ductlve reasoning; while. pretty nearly1 all that has helped men baa been tha 'if ot tha InducUva prooeaa.