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About The Athena press. (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942 | View Entire Issue (April 8, 1910)
"Ship It to Me" SAYS SMITH Smith wants every dressed veal and hog in the country. He never charge eom miion. We will pay aa follows for rood, fat stuff. Ship by expre a. Dressed Veal up to ISO lbs....... 12HC Dressed Pork 110. Live Chickens ,.16c Dressed Chickens..... ,.17 Vic Eggs Market Price Address FRANK L. SMITH MEAT CO. "fighting the Beef Trust" PORTLAND. OREGON Literally So. "i hear your girl has a good trade How." "Don't speak of It as" a trade; It U n real calllpg." "What Is It?" . "She ii a telephone operator." Bal timore American. Depravity. Goodman Gonrong What d'ye reck on Is the deadest of the. dead lan guages? : . .-;'..-" - ' Saymold Storey My guess is that It's the one you , use ... when you're coughin'. - ; ' ' Simplifying- It. joslah, what Is the house of lords?" "It's one branch of the British par lament You've heard of the house of commons, haven't you?" "Ye-es." . "Well, the lords are the uncommon." The Real Victim, Mrs. Kawler Isn't the oost of living frightful these days? Mrs. Renntur Indeed It Is. It's so bard to save enough out of It to pay the still greater cost of moving! Chi' oago Tribune. Those Loving Friends. - "Maybelle Do you think this photo graph looks like me? Gladys Not In the least, dear; but It's a splendid picture. SEEDS Catalogue ; for the Asking Send for It J.f J, BUTZER 188 Street Front . Portland, Oregon WE PAY CASH For homestead relinquishments, and can sell your farms and ranches quickly. Let us handle your business and we will guarantee your satisfaction. Give full particulars in first letter. DAVIS & EUITKAMP 010 Dekum Bldg. . Portland, Or $2,000 A YEAR Is being earned by hundreds of Chiropod ists. The work is easily learned, competi tion slight, returns lucrative. A thousand graduates could be placed tomorrow. Write for particulars The Western School of Chiropody v.; . Portland, Oregon 11 A Broken Down Foot-Arch. SEEDS To growth fin est Sowers and most luscious vetro tables, claut the best because they never mil in yield or aualltv. The best aarden- era ana Tanners everywnere know Ferry s seeas to be tn highest standard of Quality yes attained. j)or sue everywhere. I FESKT'S 1910 Sett Annual Free on request .M. HURT a CO, snsQir.Hita. MODERN - EXPERT DENTISTRY At Prices that Defy Competition TEC lit WITHOUT PLATES A SPECIALTY PAINLESS EXTRACTION 60c SILVER KILLINGS. ,.60c up GOLD FILLINGS $1.00 UP S2K GOLD CROWN ....$5.00 GOOD RUBBER PLATE $5.00 THE BEST RUBBER PLATES $8.00 WHALEBONE PLATES S10.00 Out-of-town patients can obtain perfect work and save money by calling at our office. NO STUDEN rs NO GAS ND COCAlNit All work guaranteed for ten vears - CHICAGO PAINLESS DENTISTS 323 Washington St.. Cor. Sixth established IS years. Here to . Hetewortny Exception. -The early bird had caught the worm. Thinking the Incident self-asplana-tory and the moral perfectly obvious, the bird refrained from trying to say anything smart - Thereby Introducing a startling In novation and establishing (a new rec ord. "J. 'His Wonderful Tact. Wheeler Why, Miss Snooper, how costumes completely alter people! I hardly tnew you. Mlsa , Snooper Do I look such a fright, then? ' - Wheeler On the contrary, you look most charming. Illustrated Bits. Two Harassed Nation. Bay Mackerel Thanksgiving and Christmas may be seasons for the dis memberment of Turkey, but I know a nation in even a worse case. Shad Rse What Is that? Bay Mackerel Lent, when ocean Che baiting of fin-land. - - - Expected Trouble. One evening Fred, aged 4, says the Chicago News, saw a shooting star for the first time. Running Into the house, he exclaimed: "Oh, mamma, I'll bet there's going to he trouble in heav en to-night Somebody let one of the stars fall." TJnlted on That. "There is a wide difference of opin ion as to the desirability of a quiet wedding." 1'. ':..:.."; v ,? ' : "Weiir :."';"v-':." y:.r "But everybody wants an unosten tatious divorce." Louisville Courier Journal. Coining Another Word. Willie Pa, may I ask one more ques tion? ; Pa Well, what Is it? Willie If a man from Portugal li a Portuguese is his little boy a Por tugoeiingT Pa Right to bed with you. St Louis Times. Sure of Htm. "I'll give you a position as clerk to itart with," said the merchant, "and pay you what you are worth. Ia that latlsfactory?" "Oh, perfectly," replied the college rraduate,"but er do you think the Irm can afford It?" -Catholic Stand ard and Times. Unpremeditated Sarcasm. Eminent Musician Among my pro fessional friends I '"', Reporter . (gasping) Professional friends I Are they living? : Bad Breath "For months I had great trouble with my stomach and used all kinds of medicines. My tongue has been actually as green as grass, my breath having a bad odor. Two wekaAgo a friend recommended Ca scare ts and after using them I can willingly and cheerfully say that they have entirely cured me. I therefore let yon know that I shall recommend them to any one Buffer ing from such troubles." Chas. H. Hal pern. 114 E. 7th St, New York, N. Y. CUT THIS OUT, mail It with your ad dress to the Sterling Remedy Company, Chicago. Ill,, and rec ive a handsome sou venir Gold Bon Bon FREE. , : : tSods Don't waste time and money plant ing poor seeds. Our seeds won First Grand Prize at the Seattle Exposi tion. Our prices are reasonable. Big Catalogue free. Send for a copy. Vogeler Seed Co. ' Salt Lako City, Utah KOW-KURE is not a "food" it is ti medicine, Mid the only medicine in the world for cows only. Malic for the cow and, as its name indicates, a Cow Cure. Bnrrennss. retained after birth, abortion, scours, caked udder, and all similar sffecttons positively and quickly cured. No one who keeps cows, whether ninny or few, can afford to be without KOW KUfiE. It Is made epecially to keepcows healthy.- Our book "Cow Money" sent FREE. Ask your local dea'er for KOW-KURE or send to the manufacturers. DAIRY ASSOCIATION CO. , LyadesviDt, It FOR PINKEYE DISTEMPER CATARRHAL FEVER AND ALL NOSE AND THROAT DISEASES Cnrei the sick and acts as a p eventlve for others. JAqaii g"ven on the tongue. Safe for brood mares and ail others. Bes, k idney remedy ; 60 cents and $1 a bott le ; $5 and $10 the dozen. Sold by alldru -gisti and horse goods houses, or sent, expresi paid, by the manufacturers. SPOHN MEDICAL CO., Chemists,. Goshen, Ind IN OF " THE DESCHUTES VALLEY - The Place You've Been Readin About Write for In. ormaUon. CO0P.R & TAYLOR, Selling Agts. 206-7-8-9 Henry BWg, Portland. Oregon DISPUTED DA VINCI BUST. i V A 4 i-i-WiiiWeiivrtnn -i )'-ii;i ranw niVi mrv 1 - 1' - - rnv Dr. Bodo, who was responsible for the purchase of the "Leonardo da Vinci wax bust" that has aroused so much controversy, is the director of the Kaiser Friedrich museum, Berlin, and it was for that. institution that the work was bought, for $40,000. Dr. Bode is aa firmly convinced that the bust is, in very truth, the work of Leonardo as are certain others that it is the work of R. C. Lucas, the British sculptor, who nourished in the middle of the nineteenth century. Indeed, the more the doctor examines the bust the more certain he is that it is a genuine early sixteenth century work. BASHFUL STANLEY. lis Response to a Speech of Entog t m Banquet. -' William H. Ridelng tells In Mc Clure's Magazine of a dinner of the Papyrus Club In Boston at which Hen ry M. Stanley, the explorer, was the guest of honor: . "Whether he (Stanley) sat or stood, he fidgeted and answered in monosyl lables not because he was unamiable or. unappreciative, but because he this man of iron, God's instrument, whose word in the field brooked no contradiction or evasion, .he who de fied obstacles and danger and pierced the heart ot darkness waa bashful even in the company of fellow crafts men. - ;"- . ; ' ' ' "Hl9 embarrassment grew when after dinner . the chairman eulogized him to the audience. He squirmed and averted his face as cheer after cheer confirmed the speaker's rhetori cal ebullience, of praise. 'Gentlemen, I introduce to you Mr. Stanley, who,' et. The hero stood up slowly, palrt; fully, reluctantly, and, with a gesture of deprecation, fumbled in first one and then another of his pockets with out finding what he sought ''It waa supposed that he waa looking for his notes, and more applause took the edge off the delay. His mouth twitched without speech for another awkward minute before, with a more erect bearing, he produced the object of his search and put it on his head. It was not paper, but a rag of a cap, and with that on he faced the com pany aa one who by the act had done all that could' be expected of him and made further acknowledgment of the honors he had received superfluous. It was a cap that Livingstone had worn and that Livingstone had given him." A Carton Experience. Lombroso, the famous Italian crimi nologist, once had a curious experi ence. He was in a printing office cor recting the proofs in his "Delinquent Man" with the chief reader when on reaching a page which dealt with a young man who, Impelled by jealousy, had stabbed his fiancee, he made a sur prising discovery. The proofreader was this man. . "Suddenly," Lombroso said in telling the story, "he threw himself at my feet, declaring that he would commit suicide if I published this story with his name. His face, before very gen tle, was completely altered and almost terrifying, and I was really afraid that he would kill himself or me on the spot. I tore up the proofs and for everal editions omitted his story." At. the Darklown Cnltnre Clnb. Chairman (including an address ot Introduction) An' now, ladies and gentlemen, I hab de honor of presentin' to dis audience de speaker of de eben Ing Prof. Johnslng of de Westvllle seminary who will proceed to define de indefinable, depict de Indeplctabl and unscrew the unscrewtable. Life. A Frequent Insincerity- "The man's own words prove him Prevaricator," said Mr. Quibbles. "In what wayT" "He writes me an insulting lettei and signs it Tours Respectfully.' Washington Star, Before Election Out West. "Our ticket is bound to win in Fro n Dog." , "All over but the shouting, ehf "All over but the shooting," explain ed the native politely. Louisville Co ler-JournaL ; The Wpobb Party. Bill Congratulations on your mar riage, old man. . Will Congratulate my wife, old boy; the got the best of men. Hap ward Lampoon. A B rasa-art. "Pa, what Is a braggart?" "He's a man, my son, who is not afraid to express his real opinion of himself." Boston Transcript. Riches have wings, but poverty bob. 1 blea around on crufohM Don't Wait or 6piing to cme, but begin to build up your system now by cleansing your blood of those impurities that have accumulated In it during the winter. To build up your system now will help you through the sudden and extreme changes of w. a: her at this treason and very likely s ve you from serious sickness later. Hood's Sarsaparilla is the medicine to take. It purifies the blood and (lives strength and vigor. Get It today In usual liquid form or chocolated tablets called Sarsatabs.' ; 00 Doses M. :'."-; Lived Too rnst. : "Poor fellow! He is quite broken down, and the doctor says that bit condition is due to fast living." "Fast living?" ,'.' . - Yes; you see, he is a traveling man, and he was obliged to eat so many dining-car meals and lose so much sleep in sleepers that his constitution gave way." Brooklyn Citizen. . The "BlacbHnnd" Business. Mrs. Bart My husband got a letter to-day saying something dreadful would happen if he didn't send the writer a sum of money. Mrs. Smart My husband . gets dunned for his bills, too. Boston Transcript v' "- ;S ; r Quick As Wink. If your eyes ache with a smartm&r. burning sennation and dizziness, use PETTIT'S EYE SALVE. AH drwreists or Howard Bros., Buffalo, N. Y. And It Did. "Roll on, thou mighty ocean I" The poot wrote his song. Ah, well, the bard Jhaa had his way. For ever since that fateful day The ocean has, In ceaseless play, Been rolling right alongl C&lcogo Tribune. '. Squabbling- Abont Nothing-. "To-day my wife and myself had the most foolish squabble of our married career." "And what was the subject of your discussion?" - ' "How we would Invest our money if we had any." Kansas City Journal. llothen win find Mrs. WInslow's Boothta Syrup the best remedy to use for their children luring the teething period. ' As He .Ground. Tennyson had Just begun to write the "Charge of the Light Brigade." "Half a league, half a league, : . Half a league onward . Then he stopped. . "Sounds a good deal like 'Off agin, en agin, gone agin, Flnnegan!" he said, knitting his brows. - But he went ahead with it, and the Jingle made a decided hit Chicago Tribune. ; '-'-'- - Didn't Exactly Mean It The Girl Isn't this play tiresome! The Toung Man It's an awful bore. But there Is so use, Miss Pinkie, of your trying to cohoeal a yawn with that fairy little hand of yours; it can't half cover er I mean that is Chicago Tribune. . TO CURE A COLD IN ONC DAY Take LAXATIVE BROMO Quinine Tablets. Druggists refund money If it falls to cure. . W. GROVE'S signature is on each box. 46. . , Hta Pursuit. "What does Ardup follow for a liv ing r . - , "Just now he la following old Scad well's daughter, in the hope that h will be living In the Scadwell family seme' day." - Our .Lucky Age. "Speaking of the Wright brothers, tt'i a good thlzr for people who like to trarel by water that Fulton lived a good many years ago." . "Why thatr..-:;;:. '::y.:- . ' "He would undoubtedly be trying to get an injunction on all the boats afloat." Boston Herald. afiarortun of Dullness Dullness means a lack of imagina tion, and without imagination life and happiness are both Impossible. Re ligion and art. from one point of view, ahare the same mission. They brine to man the sense of amazement. They teach us that the world Is a wonderful fairy palace, the "place of hourly mira cles. Then we discover that we our selves are most amazing creatures. The dull man is not interested in himself, has no self-love. I am certain that nc man can love his neighbor unless he has learned to love himself. From our selves wt discover humanity. 'V;' . Fair, Fat and Tlde-y. '.';, A Eansan sat on the beach at Atlan tic City watching a fair and very fai bather , disporting herself in the surf. Ha knew nothing of tides and he did not notice that each succeeding wave came a little closer to his feet At last an extra-big wave washed over hit shoetops. : ;,.r; ' ".. "Hey, there!" he yelled at the fair, fat bather. "Quit yer Jumpin' up and down! D'ye want to drown me?" Everybody's. PIICS CURED IN 6 TO 14 DAYS PAZO OINTMENT Is guaranteed to cure any case of Itching. Blind. Bleeding or Protruding Piles in 6 to 14 days or money refunded. 60a. ' . : . . Tact. ..... 1 Girl With the Fur Jacket Every body speaks well of the preacher al your church. . . Girl With the Yellow Buskins He'i Just as nice as he can be. When there's only a few people at the morning ser vice he. never gets cross and roastt them because the congregation Isn't larger. ' ' - -' ' .: Genuine Alarm. "Madam, your pet dog bit my little boy in the face this morning." "Oh, you alarm me! Had your little boy's face been antlseptlcally washed?" "Of course not. I " "Good heaven, woman! How could you let the little darling run such a risk! James, telephone at once for the veterinarian." Baltimore Amer ican. - V Lightning- Change. "Maria, who Is the spider legged gawk that comes to see Bessie two or three times a week?" "Why, don't you know, John? That's young Mr. Welloph, the Junior partner In the firm of Spotcash & Co." "Well,-confound her, why doesn't she give him a little more encouragement?" Chicago Tribune. ' Portland Is the big market place of the - Northwest; Send Your Produce THERE-u. We are handlers of Eggs, Butter, Veal, Dressed Hogs, Poultry, live or dressed: also Apples, Onions, Pota toes. Consignments, whether large or small, are solicited. We can give you good prices for good stuff. Write Us. McEwen & Koskey . COMMISSION MERCHANTS 129 Front St, Portland, Ore. . Does Not Color Hair Ayer's Hair Vigor, as now made from our new improved formula, does not stain or color the hair even to the slightest degree. Gray hair, white hair, blonde hair is not made a shade darker. But it certainly does stop falling hair. No question about that. Does not change the color of the hah. yers Vormula with mob bottle f Show it to your doctor Auk him about it, than do aa ha says Indeed, we believe it will stop every ctse of falling hair unless there Is some very unusual complication, something greatly affecting the general health. Then yon should consult your physician Also ask Dim about the new Ayer's Hair vigor. -Mad by the J. 0. Aysr Co., Low.U, Mass. - The Wisdom ot Silence. The late Judge Silas Bryan, ' the father ot William J. Bryan, once had several hams stolen from his smoke house. He missed them at once, but said nothing about it to any one. A few days later a neighbor came to him. "Say, Judge," he said, "I hear'd yew had some hams stole t'other night" "Yes," replied the Judge, very con dentlally, "but don't tell any one. Tot) and I are the only ones who know It" Success Magazine. To the Dnsement Via Wlrelesa. The Janitor neglects the heat, A customary trick! The tenant kicks a register - To register a kick. Kansas City Times. , REDUCE THE COST OF UY1N! useCRESCEHT BAKING POWDER 25c. FULL POUND Best for Children s COFFEEt TEA SPICES BAKINO powder v EXTRACTS JUST RIGHT s sswseen sip. mi l 1iiii.riWnflTiiiiiil'i OOSSETqDEVEKS, una ri itin ns r- ' I Trial Bottle Free Br Mall II I 1 ; ' CURE XEt till tn m Qi&kixm Give instant relief when utile throats are irritated and sore. Contains no opiates and is as pleasant to take at it is effective. ) AH Druggists, 28 i Pleasant tytenft wicial, Syrup of Figs and Elixir of Senna appeals to the cultured and the well-informed and the healthy because its component parts are simple and whole some and because it acts with out disturbing the natural func tions, as it is wholly free from every objectionable quality or substance. In its production a pleasant and refreshing syrup of the figs of California is unit ed with the laxative and car minative properties of certain plants known to act most bene ficially, on the human system, mrhen its gentle cleansing is de sired. To get its beneficial ef fects, always buy the genuine, for sale by all reputable drug gists; one size only, price fifty cents a bottle. The name of - the company - California Fig Syrup Co. is always plain ly printed upon the front of ev ery package of the genuine. JYf . r v'i If yon sailer from Epilepsy, Fits, Falling Sickness, Spasms, or bare children thst do so, my New Dis covery will relieve them, snd all you are asked It do Is (o send for a Free Trlalsa Dottle of Dr.Msr'i i Epllevp'tlolden Oure . It has cured thoatands where eTerrthtng els fnlled. Guamntecd by Hay Medical Laboratory Under Pure Food and Drugs Act, June SOlta, lOOl Guaranty No. 1M971. Please write for 8ieclalFiee ft liottle aud (rive A G B and com plete address DR. W. H. MAY, 648 Pearl Street, New York, Painless Dentistry t jobs oi towa people '4 Dull in.K v ana Driuseworj i liheit la one t Ut neeeaiary, and brlusework fin. oaf We will a-ive you t feet iM (olo 'MM orcll erewnlor J3.6 Meltr Crdtm 5.0 22kBrld(TMtli3.6 Gold Fllllns-e 1.0 Enamel Filllscs 10 Silver rilllnjs .6 Inlay Fllllnn 2.6 i piitw B.C3 t. o..i d.j avk. Ba. W. . will, rutam u Mtva , e n mm tniHimn nm -m PiIoIsm Eilr'itos .0 WORK GUARANTCKO FOR IS VsTAWS Palalees titration m wnnn puraw nriliirod. Oonnulutlon Free. Yno cannot g t 1 palnlnw work done anywhere. All work f ullf ruar. mntvvA. Moiieraelnctrlueuulpnient. Keel mnUtoe, Wise Dental Co. INCOttPORATKk. KSK PORTLAND. ORBOOM OWIUS BOUKSi la.ll.mML eMuoays. I sslj 7 K ft y 1 aliornia Syrup (9. LOUy VILLE, KY. a. jm SAN FRANCISCO, CAT- NEW YORK, N. 1 C. Gee Wo The Chinese Doctor This wondaful man has made a life study of the properties of Roota, Herbs and Barks, end Is giving the world the beueflt of his services. No Mercury, Poison or Drugs Used. No Operations er Cutting Guarantees to cure Catarrh, Asthma, Lnnr, Btomarb and Kidney troubles, and all Private Piseaaes of H a and Women. A SURS CANCER CURE Just received from Pekin, China safe, sure and reliable. Unfailing in Ita works. If you cannot call, write for symptom blank and circular. Inclose 4 cents la stamp. COMSUtTATION TREE The C. Gee Wo Medicine Co. 162Vi rirst St., cor. Morrison, Portland, Or. PNU No. -10 w BKtf writing to advertisers plea nentlaa this paper. PUT MAM FADELESS DYES mors roods brtT.tr and tauter colors than any other dye. One lOe ipscfta efrl2"l,r!aVX1 'wSMr f?efb&S2 uarnd.to sly. perfect fesulU. dealer, or we WUI send Postpaid at 10c a peck.e. Write foi J'" WVSlswv mvmm-mim ' e er i Color afes4 im e fjuauetuwajw W Sa V vvaaww w a SW to dye, attach swd isis co""