rhe Kidneys When they are weak, torpid, or stagnant, the whole system, suffers. Don't neglect tliem at tbis time, but heed the warning of tbe aching back, the bloated (ace, the sallow complexion, the urinary disorder, and begin treatment at once with Hood's Sarsaparilla which contains the best and safest curative substances. In usual liquid form or In chocolated tablets known as Sarsatabs. 100 doses $1. For the Defence. Ma I hear that you're been playlnj with Donald Smith again. Tommy, Now, I told you Tommy Playing w ith him ! Tou see the black eye be'i Cot and you'll soon guess if there wai any playing about it Punch. His Wooden Eieai. It was the next morning and Mr. Jar ray was penitent. 'This la positively the last time, my dear," be aaid to his wife. "I had been reading about the exhaustion of ths tim ber supply and I wanted to go on on mors bat before It waa all gone." Wayside Communings. Adam Zawfox They say meat is goln to be cheaper. Job Sturky If It's any cheaper than the kind they've been handin' out to me lately somebody'll bev to pay me fur eatin' It, b'garsh I I'm no garbage reduc tion plant. "WHIZ" A New Parlor Game For the Long Winter Evening FREE Go to your dealer and buv a pound pack age of 20-Mule-Team BORAX. Gut off the top panel from package and mail to Pacific Coast Borax Co. Oakland, Cal. with 4c in tamps and the W HIZ game will be promptly sent you Prepaid. WHIZ, the New Parlor Card game, can be pUyed by all the family. It is co m Ked of 44 handsomely pri nted card g inclosed in a flap case with full and com plete rules for playing. Entertaining, instructive or educational. Similar games coat 60c In the shops. You can get it FREE. Mail Orders You run no riek in sending your mail orders to us. We han dle reliable goods only and guar antee perfect satisfaction both as to price and quality. Send for our i.ew reduced price list. New Fall Stock Women's Tail ored Suits, Skirts, Waists, Hos iery, Muslin Underwear, Corsets, Gloves, Dress Goods, Table Lin ens, Lace Curtains, Etc., Etc. & Cor. Third and Morrison Portland, Oregon The stoe noted for Best Goods at Lowest Pricei. A PRIZE 1 Ufais&aLL 1 IJ 1 , Find Santa Clms in Picture and Win a Fin Reward Free For every correct ablution of this pin I'e, we will give, absolutely free, a Mu sic Book, containing 5i good o d favor ta National Songs with words and mu lo (only one book to each peron) a to many other valuab e prises free. Ev ryoue ilumld know these aongs lend today. Directions Mark outlines ot Santa Claim plainly, cut adv. out, place In envelope, enclose stump tor reply and mall to our address below. 353 Washington St Cor. Park PORTLAND ORE. I.KAIMVO" WKSTKKN Wlaaen will be aetifled promptly by aaiL plnnor.llobllitr V'y 1 J EH3LISH 8T0EIE3. The Strlkl. Way am Oxford Notable YVoa at If iclcatatnae). Dean Stanley once went late to din ner with his collar flapping. Ills host ess ventured to ask him if he knew. "Oh, yes!" answered the dean. "Do you mlndr "Not at all." said the lady. "Then I don't mind, either. The button dropped off while I was dress ing." And the dean continued his con versation. Rev. W. H. Tuckwell is responsible for the history of how an Oxford nota ble In the thirties got his nickname, "Presence of Mind" Smith. He went boating with a friend and returned alone and was asked what had become of his companion. He explained that his friend had fallen Into the Thames, "and If I had not with great presence of mind hit him on the head with a boat book the both of us would have been drowned." The late Joseph Joachim was a great favorite In London, and for more than sixty years rarely missed a season there. A certain nobleman told him that he was going to St. James' ball to bear him, and Joachim later asked him if he had found it tedious. "Not at all," serenely answered the titled per sonage. "I enjoyed myself Immensely. I did not recognize you at first under your disguise as a nigger, but later I laughed all the more." The nobleman had strolled by mistake Into' a min strel show instead of the large concert hall. Small Harold, after slitn? up tha new baby, said: "Well, that kid hasn't got any hair to comb, but he's got an awful lot of face to be washed." Mamma Garret, your conduct Is Just dreadful. Why do you act so uaughty? Garret (age 5) Oh, I guess it's be cause I'm too little to know any better. Mamma Do you love your teacher. Tommy? Tommy Yes, mamma; but don't want you to tell her. Mamma Why not? Tommy 'Cause she might sue me for breach of promise. Visitor Well, my little man, have you any brothers? Bright Boy Yes, ma'em; I have one, but my sister has two. Visitor Why, bow's that? Bright Boy She has me and my brother. i (MlTlw. VAt1lvia atnM n nstliAie v Via small daughter, "you never saw me act . u. kA Kn ..ih tis riirs nr rwlipd Nelll. "I'm too much of a lady to notice such things." Little Sally (reading) What Is prolonged conflict, Harry? Small Har- ry I don't know. 1 asked papa this morning what It was and he said It was something I couldn't understand in til I grew up and got married. "Why, Nettie," said her mother, "what in the world are you pounding your doll with your fathers slipper' for?" "Because she refuses to obey me, maiumft," replied the little miss. "I'm not going to have the neighbors say that I spared the slipper and spoiled my child." Little Lloyd Papa, was George Washington married to England? Papa Of course not, my son. Why do you ask such a silly question? Little Lloyd This book says England Is our moth er country and as George Washington waa the father of his country I sup posed they were married. Couldn't De Fooled. The younger son of a well-known po litician of Chicago has spent pretty much all of his life in the big city by the lake, and, consequently, knows lit tle of country ways and things. Not long ago he visited a man he had met in Chicago, and who maintains a big farm near Cairo, whither he had Insisted the youngster come for a lengthy stay. One day the Chicago youth was wan dering about the farm, closely exam ining the top, ends and sides of a cer tain trim, well-made object fenced round in the paddock. "What are you searching for, Jim my?" asked the owner of the place, with a quizzical smile. "Where are the doors and windows?" asked Jimmy. "Doors and windows! Why, Jimmy, that's a haystack." "Look here, old man," exclaimed Jim my; "I may be only a green person from the city, but you can't bluff me that way. Hay doesn't grow In lumps like that 1" Harper's Weekly. . Jnat at Suasreatlon. "Oh, my !" exclaimed the excited wo man who had mislaid her husband, "I'm looking for a small man with on eye." "Well, ma'am;" replied the polite shopwalker, "If he'a a very small man maybe you'd better use both eyes." A Thoughtful Wit. "Why did you tell your husband that there would be three parts to ths con cert? There are only two." "Yes, I know, but he will be so pleas ed when it leaves off sooner than be txpects." FUegende Blaetter. A Sure Wlaater, Mrs. Henpeck Those who are un lucky in love are said to be lucky at cards. j Henpeck If you'd let me out nights, dear, I think it would be a good thing or me to play poker. Puck. Before doing anything as a result of enthusiasm or excitement, see if your enthusiasm or excitement wont wear off. t 1 PASS ? UIT AF THF VflllMflSTFDS. ) i x .... . , For that Dandruff There is one thing that will cure it Ayer's Hair Vigor. It is a regular scalp-medicine. It quickly destroys the germs which cause this disease. The unhealthy scalp becomes healthy. The dandruff disap pears, had to disappear. A healthy scalp means a great deal to you healthy hair, no dan druff,no plmples.no eruptions. The beat kind ot a testimonial "Bold for over sixty years." A Mad tor J- 0. Ayer Co., Low.ll, Alto axaauiaotarera ef J SARSAPAKIUX yers PILLS. CHER1Y PECTORAL. Making Tulare Brea. Customer (to watchmaker) I told you that my watch lost half an hour every day, and now that you're repair ed it It gains half an hour. Watchmaker Well, don't comnlala It's onlv working to catch uo lost time. THIS AROUND ELLS HOW TO MAKF A SIMPLE RHEU MATISM CURE AT HOME. Prescription Given Which Sufferers Dread Disease Can Easily Make Up and Try at Home at Small Cost. Fluid Extract Dandelion, one half ounce; Compound Kargon, one ounce; Compound Byrup Sarsaparilla, three ounces. These harmless ingredients can be obtained from any druggist in the smaller towns, and are easilv mixed by Inaking them well in a bottle. Relief js generally felt from the first few AaMaMi This prescription, states a well- known anthnrltv in a Cleveland morn- ing paper, forces the clogged-up, lnao- 'T,1k,idejllt0 fileI "nd f?" tha blood the Doisonous waste matter tiflC, As Rhenmatism is not only the most painful and torturous disease, but dan- geieus to Hie, this simple recipe will, no doubt be greatly valued by many sul- ferers here at home, who should at once prepare the mixture to get this relief , li said that a person who would tok th'B P"cription regularly, a dose vr iwo uaiiy, m eveu a mir wura week, would never have serious Kidney or Urinary disorders or Rheumatism. Cut this out and nrestrre It. Good i Rheumatism prescriptions which really relieve are scarce, indeed, and when ' you need it, you want it badly. Aftermath. Viiritoi" How are conditions here? Has xmfidence returned? ' Resident Conditions are siowly set tling down to their former basis, but con Bdence has not returned. Most of the people still believe it was the children of their next door neighbors that carried iway their gates. Z. . . ... Mothers win ana Mrs. wnwows uootmni Byrup the b-at remedy to use to their chiWrea uunug toe w,uuu leriuu. Te Be Avoided. "Do you believe there is any future for mala polities?" ".Yes," answered Senator Sorghum; "but in these days of graft you want to take mighty good care not to be one of those fellows who start In with a Qne future and come out with a terri ble past." Wnshins'tnn Star. St. Vims' Dance ana alt Nervous Dtsrasea permanently cured by Dr. Kllne'e Great erve Rpatorer. Pena ror r Kl-.lv Si trial ootue ana treatise. Dr. K. H. aULM, Ld., Ul Arch bt FhUa.,P Then the Flreworka. "I bad a call from Mrs. Multiplunks resterday." -"Yes?" "Tes." "I heard she was going In for shun ning." Houston Tost ytupffigs r.C? ixirsjdeimai 11 V, Dispels Colds aniilead- i uauvixmoeLs I U II f i. . acnes due To IxmsTiDaTioru Acts naturallv. acts fmh a Laxative. Best forMenVmpn and Child-rerj-Abungand Old, To get its Tjeneficial Effects Alwavs w,tne Genuine wkica has The jull name of the Com pany CALIFORNIA Jio Syrup Co. m !t w manufoetureti, printed en rKe front ef avry package. SOLD BY ALL LEADING DRUGGIST ait on raaUtr price SOtperkottla. I n II A. A .( T)L.M I lo reneva mo wureu luriiia vi uuou- ki i , t laae of Itch nr. Blina. ineeaine or rrowuaini ' inatism. take a teaspoonful of the fol- "F"""' , lowing mixture after each meal and at Vfr rMvart ,.T nTIW., r.r.r T k.Jli.. " ' w sv, , r,. v. I ODD EXPERIENCES 07 TOURISTS Americans Tell of Queer HappaaUaara While) "Dol.ar Earopa." How cat language is unalterably con fused with his first Impressions of Franca is a story told by one of a trio of far western Americans . who have arrived at tie Hotel do Iuvrs after "doing Europe" for the first time. The party is composed of W. Vlrges, a lumberman from Tacoma, and E. K. Coovert, a Portland (Ore.) attorney, and his wife, who has been studying operatic singing In Dresden. "I didnt know we had crossed ths German-French frontier," said Mr. Coo- rert "I was asleep on the seat and a French lady with a cat in a basket got aboard and went asleep alongside Suddenly the cat started to cry, and, ( waking up, I discovered I was leaning too close to the lady (probably mashlntj the cat), and as she awoke, too, sha pulled out her ticket, waving it In my ;face. As I couldn't talk French, I told her In English I didn't want he ticket, but to give it to the conductor When 'somebody came to explain I discovered the trouble to be that I was taking up 'a u . x ., too much of the seat Things like that don't happen at home." At Mayence Mr. Vlrges says b worked a unique scheme to see tht Kaiser during the maneuvers, "Some one told me It would be al most Impossible to get close enough to see him," said Mr. Vlrges. "But I went to authorities, and told them I was a Journalist from some Pacific coast newspaper, and after I had se cured tbe necessary papers I went to the maneuvers in an automobile, pulled out the papers and passed the police, who saluted. I took with me to a hotel afterward two Phlladelphlans, and wi dined overlooking the boulevard when ' the Kaiser was to pass. Almost lmme- dlatftlY hn jmnMi-iwi and whon tha Phil. ! aaeipnians cneerea tne falser looked ,r .rui .. it... Mr. and Mrs. Coovert nearly go locked up In tbe opera here. Mrs. Coovert, Whom I cam over tl " uufc S!0 came out and 8an8 untu on dled- The curious thing wa that when , w lef ' our nats comln8 'a neither ol u took any notice where. When w cams out we could not find the saint cloakroom and neither of us could speak one word of French. We pre sented the ticket at four different ft) mAm mrA T . 1 A a-a everybody else was gone one of the at f.nj..i. . ... v .l. ubov6A u. tha ,.. Thov ,., slamming the doors when we started 4 . ...... "After these experiences I am strong ly la favor of a universal language) ftnd tnt ought to be the American lan-( ,fc7iae New York Herald. Tt.Mii. i. . i. . Liability of a city for Injuries due to U upon a sllewalk covered with Ics and snow, where the Ice, which accumu- lated from natural causes, was lest than an inch in thickness, and the per! LEGAL DTFOEHATION. aon Inlnrerl know whon hn wont nnnn Mairsuatarrn i;nre ls iaien iniernaiiy, sou on iniurea Knew wnen ne went upon icts directly upon the blood and mucous sur it that It was smooth and Slippery, and laces of thesystem. Bend for testimonials ifree. fWw w F. J.CHENEY ACO.,Toledo,0. Evans vs. Concordia (Kan.), 7 L. R. A. (N. S.) 983. Notwithstanding the statute provides that a mortgage of real estate shall not h rlepmorl a crmveviinoe. whnrovAr Its torma tn onahiA th rn Af fh. - mortgage to recover possession without. a foreclosure, It Is held, in Moncrlefl) VS. Haro (Col.), 7 L. R. A. (N. S.) 1001, that a court of equity may, pend' ing foreclosure, Impound the rents and profits to be applied in reduction of the debt That each proprietor and wholesale of patent medicines Is permitted to do termlne for himself to what retailers Via nrlll rAfSin trt aoll la halil In tavn. vs. Loder (C. C. A. 3d C.) 7 L. R. A. J (N. 8.) 9S4. not to prevent an under- taking on the part of associations of proprietors, wholesalers and retailers to prevent rate-cutting from being within the Sherman anti-trust act, if they bind themselves by an agreement not to sell to aggressive cutters of prices, and ..the agreement Is enforced by the retailers notifying wholesalers who are aggressive cutters and putting upon the list of aggressive cutters all wholesalers who do not desist from selling to persons on the list so fur nished, the result of which Is greatly to Increase the cost of proprietary med icines to consumers throughout the country. . Hla Consolation). John and Willie are twins. Theli best friend and playfellow is Archls who Is gifted with red hair and a hot temper. One day they quarreled and Archie started borne in a huff. Tht unsympathetic twins called after him : "Red head, red head !" , Archie seemed not to hear until the Insult was re peated. Then he turned and called back, "Don't care If I am red headed I ain't twins, and folks can tell mt apart 1" Grand Forks Press. ' Fepra oat Sfcalceapeatre. Pepy'a Diary, 1659-1669, commenting on Shakspeare's plays, saya of "Mid summer Nlghfe Dream," "It la the most insipid, ridiculous play I ever saw In my life," and upon reading " 'Othel lo, Moor of Venice,' which I have hith erto esteemed a mighty good play, but having lately read the 'Adventures of tlve Hours,' It seems mean thing. a&ND SYSTEM DISORDERBO Catarrh, is not merely an inflammation of the tissues of the head and ttievuir o. tVi. .nnntna rt r-',-nrrl-ntT Tinier 4n ihtSTl mUCOUS dTOtrtln? baCSj tjiroatt continual hawking and spitting, etc, vould seem to ind.' ft jj a blood disease in 'which the entire circulation and the greater pajt of the system are involved. Catarrh i3 due to the presence of an excess of uric acid in the blood. The Liver, Kidneys and Bowels frequently be- come torpid and dull in their action and instead of carrying off the refosa and waste of the body, leave it to sour and form uric acid in the system, This is taken up by the blood and through its circulation distributed to all parts of the system. These impurities in the blood irritate and inflame. the different membranes and tissues of the body, and the contracting ' colti will start the secretions and other disgusting and disagreeable fymptoms of Catarrh. As the blood goes to all parts of ithe body the ca- tarrhal poison affects all parts of the system. The head has a VjV staling, uuk vuminuaiiy DLoypeu tip, paius auuvc uic tyca, p"6- comes and goes, the stomach is upset and the entire system disordered and ... .', . . . . affected by this disease. It is a waste of y"a? aTomaVoSSfdva time to tr to cure Catarrh with sprays, ,ore. I triad verythinsr washes, inhalations, etc Such treatment L.?2i4 TO 3, FX": rW r,r ir h th Wood, and can. therefore, could see uttle Improvement j0 nothing more than temporarily relieve fS&ffifSSiJ&cSSE. the discomfort of the trouble. To core This waa alas years aero, suad I am Oatorrh nmnMMtW tSt Hood mustlbe p.Urrh uVbioS-a.and thoroughlypurified and thesystem cleansed aZ" ther i"i.?ot51A 5 frLh of all poisons, and at the same tune better for the blood than B. S. B. . .u t.T.ir,aU Nobod y talaka ow of 8. s. a. Chan I do. Iiapeer, SCloh. PURELY VEGETABLE and every symptom disappears, the constitution is built up and vigorous health restored. S. S. S. also tones up the stomach and digestion and acts as a fine tonle ta the entire system. Tf von are fsiifferinw with Catarrh beffln the Kse o e s Md - Bend yon literature about Catarrh, and give you special medical advica uithout charge. S. S. S. is for sale at all first class drup; stores, THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO.. ATLANTA. GAt. . . .. The mattresses used In tha German ""' .. .7 . ... , ' Pe. ana are saia ie oe a grear. improve- neat on straw. ah ataa W I PILES CURED IN 6 TO 14 DAYS. 1 PAZO OINTMENT 1 guaranteed to cure any b9 "thread of life." Does, that-convey my idea te you? Tommy Tucker Yes'm. That's what rou feel when you've got a stitch in your tide. CASTOR I A lor Infants and Children. 1118 Kind YOU HaYB AlWOVS BOHglll ' Ynn Havo llurnue Rniitrhl Sears the Signature Cmavoldabla Delay. "Tou can prove an alibi on this charge, eap't you?" asked his lawyer. "Yes'r." said the captured crook ; "but we'll have to wait a week or two. The fellies I'm goin to prove it by ain't out ' Jail yit" Kate of Ohio, City of Toledo Lucas County. I Frank J. Cheney makes oath that he Is senior artner of the firm of F. J. Cheney A Co., doing business In the C ity of Toledo, County and State . . 1 .k.I.aM Am will nav tha.nm tf ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and . clge of catarrh that cannot be cured by u.e ol Hair, catarrh Cure CHENEY, Bworn to before me and subscribed in my pres- nc, this 6tn day oi December ADim (8esl- ' Notary Public! Rnld riv all drna-irists. 7 Sc. Take Hall's Family Fills lor constipation. Either. Slub 47 What do the letters D. P. (tand for? Cony Choppei- Depends on the con- neit They may stand fither for United p-htftprian or for Harriman. y 0nly 0ne "BROMO QUININE." rhatla LAXATIVE BROMO QUININE. Look lor the sienature of E. W. GROVE. Used tbe World over to Cure a Cold in One Day. 26c, University statistics of Europe seem :o Indicate that men are deserting tht practice of medicine and women are tak ing it up. v.- ' fs ST PATRICK G1 lf Drove all the snakes from .1 RE LAND S JACOBS Drives all aches from the body, cures Rheumatism, Neuralgia and CONQUERS PAIN 23e. ALL DRUGGISTS 50c W. L. DOUGLAS $3.00 & $3.50 SHOES THE vToRLO 55SH0ES FOR EVE BY MEMBER OF-oJijj THE FAMILY, AT ALL PRICES. w, , $25,000 f 1&3tt&2rSSr& Howard TJXJLZZ' THE REASON W. 1- Douglas shoe are worn by more people In all walks of life than any other make is because of their excellent style, eaey-fittina;, and superior wearing qualities. Tbeselectionoftheleathera and other materials for each part of tha ahoe and every detail of tha makinai a looked after by tha moat complete organization of superintendents, foreman ana akilledshoamakers,whoneairethe highest wages paid in ths shoei ndostry, and whose workmanship cannot be excelled. If Ieouldtaka vow nto to v lam factories at Brockton .Meae.. and show yon how carefully W. L Douglai shoes are made.yoa would the a undent and why they hold their shape, fit better. iMr .nil ant of arMtamli. than ftfiv Afv $4.C0 mint thMQ BILT CDaEShm awawsH' rnqmrnBrnd ml mtty mrtom. CAUTIONI The genains hare W. L. Dotatlas name and prtos stamped so bottom. Tabs ; atmbatitmte. Ask your dealer for W. I Douilaa shoaa. If hs eaaaot supply you, tao4 duMttoIaeuaqr. ebasasaotsrsrrr hereby aaaU. Ceaeiag iiw. W.Laia, bratsav, Jaaaaw strengthened and built up. Nothing equaW S. S. S. for this purpose. It attacks tha disease at its head, goes down to the very bottom of the trouble and makes a complete and lasting cure. S. S. S. removes every S article of the catarrhal poison from the lood, making this vital stream pure, fresh and healthy. Then the inflamed mem branes begin to heal, the head is loosened cleared. thehawklnr and soittinffcease, vonr rase fini ouf nhvslclans will xmn. I LaadTUlew Colorado. Bpecimtu price.: Oold, '. aiTdvinidrtiM... Viin.nTeioMaand surer, 70c: uoia, wi znaov. ft.,TirlA.UitI1tonaP6iitlon. Obntroi.ndUm. ns.i lion pi re work eoUolveo, nlnaamelr anllflllalL Mall tfaxMwei Carbonate Ma. UoaalBaak. ENGRAVING Write PLATES FOR PRINTING HICKS-CHATTEN Portland Oregon Waltx. Two Step, Three Step, ete. Dance completely taught and guaranteed Id fonr lessons Prof Wal Will-on, IS Stlllar, Hii-Mk B!4-, Portland, ureaoa SPECIAL HOLIDAY OFFER ! Mall n anraooa piotnre wlthp ata order for S1.9S and we will semi you a beautiful photo en largement of miho, framed in a hand tome frame like out; outside treasure of iranie 15x18 inchtn, We do all kfn9 of enlarKing and kodak rlniithlnK. Head utr jrour fl ma to be de veloped and finUhed. We pay return post. age. GEO. M. STRONG 13 W.Park St. ForlUndr Otjoa INSURE YOUR HEALTH an COMFORT on stormy days cy wearing a a r - towca 'IttasNP kSLICKER Clean - Light Durable Guaranteed Waterproof O 3S9 Everywhere P.N. U. No 51-07. WHEN writing; to advertisers please I mention this paper. I othar maka. aV . M-a-si'S mm mm V---- rsy :- w