The Bend bulletin. (Bend, Or.) 1903-1931, March 16, 1906, Image 3

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Friday, March 0.
Washington, Miuoli A rcHutlon
nn.l a bill designed ' ('ur" tl,n doled
President HoomoiII iolnli! out In thti
Tlllnmii'dDlo'l1'11 resolution for (lin lu
vratlgallnuyy u, '"titrntftto Coiiirmirrn
-iiiiIucIjIi of railroad discrimination
" nml monopolies wore Intro liicrd today
In dm houso The resolution was In
troduced by Reproseiitntlvo Towiisond,
of Michigan, niu) the lull by Itrjirontit
ntlvti Ulllesplo, of Texas. Townsond'a
resolution provide nn appropriation of
11)0,000 to carry on the Investigation,
nml Ilia Gillespie bill umki'ii nil appro
prlallou ol $100,000 for tho amu pur
Washington, Marrh 0. Today nt
BtIB p. in, tlm senate passed n bill for
tlm admission of n now state to be
railed Oklahoma nml to be coinjiontsl of
ilia Territory of Oklahoma nnd Indian
Ti-rritory. It wns tlm housn Joint
statehood bill with nil tlm provision
relating to Arlinun nnd Now Mexico
stricken out. Tbu motion to strike out
was midu by Burrow, mid It was car
rli'd by tlm close vota of 117 to .'lf, niter
having been loit by tlm ttlll doner vote
of nn to mi.
Ihiiimdlntoly niter tlm tlltpoiitl of
tlm ,jiUtdiood bill tlm house railroad
TflteTITljJwAN undo the unfinished bust
immSlbnfff as tlm iieiinlu ndjouned over
HidurdayFand Sunday, tbu actual for
ititl cnTTnfitorutioti of tbo measure will
not lwijo until Monday.
Thursday, March 0.
Washington. March H Todny af-
fprdnM-io 11 opportunity for general
on tlm statehood 1111. nod tlm
III VS dnvolrd to that order of
icai, marling with a speech by
limber, which Im-umi a few minute
ill o'clock, there wan no cessation
'ho spfi.klng until adjournment.
wholo lltno waa occupied by throe
inters, Hflverldito. McCumher nml
' Patterson, tbo former supporting nnd
tbo letter two opposing It. Ueverldgn
contended, Itbat, while Arizona and
New Mexico were unprepared for sep
rate Statehood, It was unjust to keep
tlir m out of the Union ai one atnto.
Jfe took tbo ground against the Foraker
amendment, which allowi each tcrrl
tory to tote eprately on the question
of jointure. McCumlwr opposed even
the Joining of Oklahoma nnd Indian
Territory, nnd I'ntteiaon hold that Ari
zona nnd New Mexico ahould bo ad
milled ns aeparnte states.
The1 senate will begin voting on the
amendment to the bill nt 4 p. in. to
morrow, nnd the final vote will I
taken beloro adjournment for the day.
!laverld(o will have the hour Ixitwecn
11 and 12 o'clock In which to conclude
Mi cjttcch,
WmblnUn, March H. Tho homo
today paracd the Indian appropriation
bill and then proceeded to IaiikIo Itself
np over the bill to nbollih the K'do of
lieutenant general In the nruiy. The
remit wna an adjournment for lack of n
quorum niter meiubora had In-en locked
In the hall for half nn hour and the
ecriienntnt-nrun had leen ecurrylnK to
tlm vurlou boteU In roarch of mem
ben. The vole to conilder the bill
bowed nn nverwhrlmlnf; rentluicnt In
ill fnvor, nnd, ns It la the pendlnn bnaU
neti under call of committee, It will
probably be reached nnd patted In due
Wednoiday, March 7.
'WnahliiKlon, March 7. I'rraldcut
Itooeevelt today rent n tneuno to con
ytvt nunnunolni; hla ilKnaturn to tho
Joint roiolutlon recently paaeud In
MtrttctiriK tho Inturatnto Commerco
tHimmlmlnn to make exmnlnntion Into
the aubjeot of rilrond dircilmlnntlonb
and mmiopolli-fl In coal nnd oil. He
eayn frankly that ho Inn dinned It with
hi citation, heennso it may achieve lit
tie or nothing.
WmiuIiikWui, Match 7. With lx act
pecohea and peimleidoii to print two
otbora In the Itecord, none of which
neio on the aainn inbject, tbu home
today closed general debate on tho In
-illnn npproprlntlon bill, nnd tomorrow
will taku that inruiuro up for amend
Jiient. Iloforo tlm hniiio took up tho Indlnn
-bill, Cnpron (Hep., It. I ) necurod tho
Vako of n Joint rcaolptlon permitting
tbo iaIo ol government conl nt Fort
Davis, Alnnkn, to the rilltons of Nome.
The eltimtlon In Ahukn promptlnK the
leKlalittlnn was Indlcntinl by Hecntary
Tail recently thnt thero l nn nbttolutt)
conl fnmluo lu Noino, Tho cold wuAth
er closed invention beforu tho conl
ships arrived, nnd the Kovenunont's
Hormnnn nt n Plaglnrltt.
WnililiiKton, March 7. Itoprmentn
tlvo Hurmnun, prolmlily lu a tit of nb
Nontiiilndodness, todny lutrodurd nn
othur Joint resolution proponing nn
amonuident to tho constitution provid
ing for tho oluctlon of United States
senators by direct vote of tlm peoplu.
Thin Is tho second tiuio this session ho
hits Introduced this resolution, nnd in
unuli Instnncu ho offered resolutions
thnt had previously boon Introduced by
otlinr inumburs, running hla pen
through tho immo of tho original nu
tlior nnd writing his own.
a m
.J' fi
i ' .1
dustlco to Solzed Seniors,
Wnshington, March 78. Tho eonnto
todny pniuod senator Fulton'a bill pur
mlitlng owners of American sealing
vessels uolsod in llolirlug sen by Amor
juloun revenue cutlers to bring suit to ro-
('c-rurou lossoa sustained. This bill, if
panjfghtylio hoitso, will put Ainorl
ewMtcMpriL' on tho samo IhibIb ns for
I'KoeTBTwjjfftufforod from llko aohmrea
or JfilTLmerlcnn Bailors whoso ships
,flwectdllby tho- Russian govern-
toply nt Fort David la dm only nvall
Uii supply.
iVnshliigton, Mnruh 7. Tlm Imum
IUMVciI in tlm controversy ovor the
piffling rnllrond rata bill worn squarely
printed to tbo senate todny In tlm
pcli of Clnpp, oiki of tlm Itepuhll.
runi supporting tbo immiiuro without
aintytinenl, mid by rraultint remark
frnifjllalloy and Tlllmnu, who aro sop
posed to represent tbo views of tho
Aldlch, Forakrr, Crnuo nnd othsr
llopublrarts, who nro seeking to amond
the ytl o na to provide for Judicial
rnvloA if order of tho Interstate Coin
umrciflcoiuiuhixlon, took the position
thnt tp discussion of tbo altuntlon
dmiioiuintcd thnt tho frlenda of the
umaMihnre divided nml thnt tlm bill
abotildliot be ncceiitml In Its preaont
lor in.
Tueidny, March 0.
Wnshluton, March (I, The hou-o
begnu ltnslun today by passing with
out dUeQtdon or opposition n bill for
dm rllof tobacco growers by permit
ting thinq to sell leaf tobacco without
paying thiftax of I) cents n pound here
tofnrii chatted. The rest of tho day
was dovoleUlo tariff dlrcusslon, tho In
dlati Hiiiiro,rltloii hill being tho ve
hicle to earn the debate.
WsthliiKtm. March (). Thoo'ieitlon
of the eniatfi'iunut of the medical do
partition! of tie army occupied the ma
jor portion ft the time of the senate
today. The mention nrose In conuro
tloit with theyunslderatlon of n bill for
the dlrplaci'inht of contract stirgons by
physician whbahall Imj given the rank
of army ofllcorf lu the reorganisation of
the medical cots. JInlw crltlclztMl the
bill ns nn e&erlng wedge for nn In
crease of the amy, and ns n part of n
geneinl plan of Vie general staff, which
he charged with i purKMio to Increase
the army's Importance, In hla remarks
the senaotr said the general staff wns
disposed to encotrage nn Invasion of
China. CaHnr and (lalllnger soko In
somewhat tbo saint vein of objection,
while the bill waadefended by Warren,
lllackburn nnd other eenntors. The bill
was not disposed of.
Monday, March C.
Washington, March fi. President
itoosevelt sent n tutelage to congress
today, accompanying plans for coast
defense prepared by n Joint board of
army and navy ofllcera, In which ho
emphasises the necessity for further de
fenses rnud review the history of the
defensive works in this country. The
president calls special attention to the
recommendation of tho board that the
entrance to Chesapeake bay be added
to the Hit of place in the United
Htatc to Imj defended. lie says the
Insular possessions cannot m longer
neglected if the United H tales desires
to hold them. Defenses are recom
mended for Manila bay, Pearl ;harbor.
Ouanlnnamso, Oitam, Hun Juan and
Honolulu, because of their strategic
situation. Defenses are recommended
for tho entrance to the Panama canal.
Washington, March 6. In the sen
ato today, Nelson continued tho discus
sion of tho statehood bill, urging tho
passage of tho measure ns reported
from tho committee on territories. The
remainder of tho session was devoted
to the psisago of tho bills on tho calen
dar, among them being one providing
for oompulsory educntion In the Dis
trict of Coin tnbl a nml another regarding
the selection of oltlcers In tho revenue
cutter service. Twoothors of import
ance to too est were;
Providing for the issuance of patents
for lands to Indians on tho Colvlllo
reservation, stnto of Wnshington, un
der tho Moses agreement of July 7,
To confer Jurisdiction upon tho Cir
cuit court for the Ninth circuit to de
termine In equity tho right of Amer
I en n cltUcns under the nwnrd of the
llohrlmj rea arbitration at Paris, nnd
to render Judgment thereon.
Wnshington, March 5. Legislation
by uunnliuoua consent nnd under sus
pension of tho rules occupied the atten
tion of the house nnd result) d in tho
passage ol several bills, some of consid
erable Importance. Tho adoption of n
resulotlou of Inquiry ns to whether
nny criminal prosecution have boon
begun ngaltiBt Individuals in the North
era Heourlties company lurninicti ine
text for a speech of criticism by 111
Inms, the Democratic leader, directed
against tho administration, llrlef an
swors weru mndo by Jenkln', of Wis
consin, nnd Urosvenor, of Ohio.
Tost Voto on Philippines.
Washington, March 0. Benntor
1xlgo, chairman of the coiumltttea on
Philippines, has decided to make n mo
tion thnt tho Bunnto discharge tho com
mitteo from further consideration of
tho tariff bill nnd It ho tnkeu up for
consideration. Under tbu ruloa a mo
Hon of this chnrnctot' la debatable. The
senator proposes to nmko an argument
lu favor of tlm bill nnd nsk thnt action
bo taken by tho senate concerning It.
Ho does not intend, howover, to preci
p'nto n continuation until nfter tho
statehood bill has leon dlspisod of.
Prospect Are Not Drlglit.
Wnshington, Mnrch 0. -A conferenco
regarding tlm statehood bill, now pond
lug in tho senate, wns held nt tho white
liouso this afternoon, tho parties to it
being, bosldea tho president, Bonntora
Long of Knnsas, llurkett of Nobraskn
nnd Warren of Wyoming, nil supportora
of the inensuro, It la conceded thnt tho
proapecka for tho enactment of tho mons
uro Into law nro not bright, and tho
conference waa bold (or tho purpose of
considering rueana to save the bill,
Orchard Know Too Many Socrols ai"
Innor Circle.
Uolso, Idaho, March 0. Asssnsslnst
ing those whoso hands woro against tho
Western Federation of Miners, and
those who refused to Join tho nssocla
lion, nro not the only crimes for which
tho members of tho Inner Circle will Imj
called upon to nnswor. Not only woro
non-union miners murdered outright,
lKJinbs plnccd for stnto officials, but tho
poor tools who committed the revolting
crimes for the Innor Olrclo woro them
selves victim of this committee of
Harry Orchard was among the tools
of tho Inner Circle marked for de
struction. Had lie managed to have
escaped nrrest after having assassinated
ex-Governor Hteunenberg, he would not
hnve lived long to enjoy the f 3,800 ho
was to have received for doing the Job.
Tho confeeslon of Htevo Adams, it Is
said, shows thnt the members of the
Inner Clicle were suspicious of Or
chard and thnt ho had been shadowed
(or n long time lWoro he wont to Cald
well for tho purpose of placing the
bomb which killed ox-Oovernor Hteu
nenberg. Hentence had been passed
upon him, and It Is said thnt whether
he succeeded, ns lie did, or failed, ho
would have been added to tho list of
tools that have been put out of tho
Crimes within crimes wns tho system
which tho Inner Clrclo cnrrled out.
Wfien dupes of tho Inner Circle had
performed so many deeds for the Inner
Clrclo that thoy know too much tlisy
were quietly gotten oat of tho way, and
it Is believed that the confessions of
Orchard nnd Adams will prove this.
Tho news that Adams had added hi
confession to that of Orchard has been
conveyed to Moyer, Haywood, Petti
bone nnd Ht. John. They were told by
their attorneys, but It is Impossible to
learn now the prisoner took tho news.
It was learned, however, that all four
of the prisoners, since they heard of
Adams' confession, have displayed
considerable concern, and for the first
time since their nrrest hnve lost much
of their assurance.
Of all the men under arrest, It is
hinted that Pettlbone Is the worst. He,
so the story goes, was the chief con
spirator, tho man who planned the
assassinations and paid out the money.
Certain testimony given Wore the
rand Jury went to show that Haywood,
who received 6 n day as secretary, had
for some tlmo prior to his arrest been
spending monoy around Denver nt the
rat of 125 a day. This money is be
lievfd to have been n part of the
assassination fund.
President Roosevelt Could Qo tolKlel
on American Warship.
Ilerlln, March 0. Professor Albrecht
Wlrth, of Munich, todny contributes
signed nrtlcle to Der Tag on the possi
bility of President Itoosevelt nnd Km
poror William exchanging visit. Pro-
lessor Wirth ha connections with the
foreign ofllce, nnd bis suggestions there
fore havo n certain interest.
"Congressman Nicholas Loncworth
and Mr. Ingworth aro oxprctod in
Ilerlln lu May," he says. 'This is not
tho tirst tlmo that tho president'
daughter has represented the United
Htates diplomatically. Her Journey to
Hast Asia had otllcial character, which
was expressed by her accompanying n
member of tho cabinet.
"President Itoosevelt himself is not
permitted to leave American territory,
but ns nn American warship is Ameri
can territory, and as President Itoose
velt has already proved in practice,
why cunnot the president give nnothor
example by visiting Kiel? Kmperor
William could then choose n return
visit In tho same form, going on a war
ship to waters near Washington. Tbee
visits would add much to tbo mutual
friendship of the two countries."
Trado With United States.
Mexico City, Mnrch 0. During the
first four months of die present fiscal
year, Mexican trado with tho United
Btntea showed nu increase in imports
of ovor $1,000,000. Kxports to the
United States wero 150,801,260, a gain
of more than $13,00,000 over the corre
sponding period of the previous fiscal
year. Kxports to Uermnuy woro more
than $0,000,000, and to Gioit ltrltnin
nearly $1,000,000, Imports from Gor
tunny fell cn moroMhnn $1,000,000,
while Great Hrltnln nnd Franco both
sold less heio than previously.
Village Falls Into Lake.
Homo, March 0. -Tho vlllngo of Tn
vernola, built on tho perpendicular cllffe
nliovo Lako Isco, In tho provlnco of
llrceci, wns almost entirely deet toyed
this morning by tho rocks suddenly
giving way, nppnrently because tho lake
hiul eaten Into tho baso of tho cliff.
Tho dleaster waH preceded by a loud
roaring uolso which enabled tho 1,000
inhabitants to escape. One fishermnn
wna killed. About 00 feet of rock nnd
tbo houses on it wero swallowed up.
Tnctobnn Is Burned.
Manila, March 0. Tactoban, tho
capital of tho Island of l.oyte, has beon
destroyod by flro. Tactoban la the,
fifth city of tbo Islands nnd was situ
ated In nn important hemp district.
A nmnbor of wnrohouies woro de
stroyed. Govornmont assistance will
bo rushed,
n a Condensed Form for Our
Busy Readers,
t tletumo of tho Lost Important but
Not Lest Intoreitlng Events '
of tho Past Week.
Tho Iowa senate has passed an ant
ral I rond pass bill.
American troop killed (100 native
outlaws in a battle in tho Philippines.
Flro nt Ban Francisco in a flvo-story
building caused a loss of over $760,000.
An agreement on Morocco Is nbont to
bo reached nt Algoclrns, the kaiser
backing down.
Tho Chineso government reassures
tlm nations thnt there will be no upris
ing against foreigners.
Tho Hariman lines will he equipped
with the block signal system from
Omaha to Los Angeles.
Tho house committee on naval affairs
favors the npiolntment of not more
than 30 dental surgeons in the navy.
President Itoosovolt has been askexl
to step in and attempt to settlo tho dif
feiences between tho coal operators and
The houso committee on elections
has favorably reported a bill providing
for the election of senators by direct
vote of the people.
Tho Port of Portland commission has
votod tho Hill company right to bridge
the Willamette below Portland accord
ing to the plana submitted by tho rail
roa I company.
Miss Susan I). Anthony ia still very
Tho Algnclraa conference is talking
of compromise.
The government has evidence of re
bates givon tho sugar trust.
No succeesor to Premier Rouvler has
yet been named In France.
Frantic etforta are being made to
save Ion City from bankrupty.
Frequent robberies have caused the
closing of money order ofllce in' Po
land. Three ofllcera of the Mutnal Reserve
Life Insurance company have besn
Indicted for stealing.
Two official of the Standard Oil have
called on President Roosevelt and seem
anxious about investigation of trusts.
J. Ogden Armour, head of the Ar
mour Packing company, complains be
cause ol aecrot service men dogging
The house committee on msrehant
marine and fisheries has fixed March
22 a the date for considering what ac
tion shall bj taken on the ship subsidy
Chineso crew on tho Pacific Mall
steamer Manchuria havo been caught
smuggling arms and ammunition out
of Ban Franciso for Boxer in China.
It Is not known bow long this has been
going on
Franco looks to America for a de
claration in her favor on the Moroccan
Tho War department says it will not
discontinue tho purchasing agency at
Portland as has been reported.
Tim next steamer sailing for tho is
land of Tahiti will carry relief for the
sufferers from tho recent tidal wave
Tlio iew lork legislature will now
Investigate stnto banks, as they are
through wtih the insurance business. -A
son of John Itoxufll, an Italian
banker of New York, bus been kidnap
ed and Is being held for a ransom of
The Chineso boycott ia Just being
folt in the United States. Kxports for
January, 1000, show a falling off of
about $780,000.
The property of the rope trust, lo
cated at Boston, la to be sold by tho
sheriff. Failure to pay interest on
bonds issued is tho cause.
That a man who has made homestead
entry, paid the fees and actually lived
thereon about one year, and who enlists
in tbo United States army or navy,
serving four years, during which time
ho is unablo to visit his land, doea not
necessarily forfeit his claim, ia n de
cision ty tho Wnshington land officials.
Japan has sent a warship to Chinese,
waters to protect lior subjects.
Rogers will answer questions nt tlm
Missouri oil heating without further
The Ftonclt army la In readiness for
war ahould such an event come from
tho Moroccan dispute
Tho Stcol trust la about to absorb nil
tho independent companies. Tho deal
will Involve nbout $17,000,.
Ex Governor Hogg, of Toxns, is dead.
Tho War dopartmont Bays it will eend
no more troops to tho Philippines for
the presont. Thoo now on tho wny
and already there will give General
Wood a command of nearly 16,000 men.
F. Samuols, secretary of tho Oceanlo
Steamship company, pays natives on
Tahiti and neighboring Islands are not
suffering for food aa a result of the ro-
cent tidal wave. lie aaya the cocoanut
grovoa nro on tho highest points.
Illllr'o I.nrk.
11111 went n-huntlngf
A-liiintlnf for a bear;
Dut the only thins; be shot
Was a baby hare.
Wily went a-flihlnr.
A-flsldns; for a whale;
J) tit the only thins; h eanjdit
Was a whult-tall.
Hilly went a rldlnjr,
But the hone did kick!
nilly lost hla balance.
And In the mud did stick.
Htralthtway home ran Billy
With a broken head;
And his mamma spanked him
And put blm rlfht to bdt
How Tout Mad It Vp.
Ono day little Tom played with his
ball In tho parlor while his mother was
out, and he broke n pretty vase. When
his mother came home ahe asked Tom
how ho came to break the rase. Tom
explained to her exactly how he had
broken It nnd said that ho was very
sorry. Ills mother said that she would
forglro him this tlmo, nnd ho promised
that ho would not disobey her ngnlu.
Tho next day Tom, who had been
thinking nil tho day before how to re
place tbo vase, thought of n plan. He
put on his hat nnd coat and started to
tho grocery shop.
"Want a boy to work for you?" ho
"Yes." replied Mr. Martin. "I was
Just going to advertise for one."
"All right," said Tom. "I'll start In
right now," and in a fortnight Tom
had earned enough monoy to buy a
rnso exactly llko tbo ono ho bad brok
en. Brooklyn Eagle.
Kxnmplea In Hainan Numeration.
Prefix ftOO to greasy and make a
small napkin.
Prefix 1,000 to tbo first man nnd
mako n woman.
Prefix BO to tho hnndlwork of Noah
nnd mako a bird of which poets love
to write.
Prefix 6 to chills nnd fever nnd mako
Prefix 100 to n kind of monkey nnd
get n woman's garment.
Answers l)-olly, m-ndnm, 1-nrk,
v-ague, c-npe,
y'hr Wo Say "Hello."
Img, long ngo wolves wero numer
ous lu nil parts of tho world, especially
lu I.nglnud. Wolf hunting wns n favor
ite sport with the gentry, nnd to kill
wolves wns regarded ns the sacred
duty of nil Englishmen, In fact, nu old
law reads : "All barons must hunt nnd
chaso a wolf four times n year."
French wns tho language of tho court
nt thnt time, so tbo burly old English
hunters used the cry of tho French
wolf hunters, which wns "An loupl Au
loupi" ("To tho wolf.") Theso words,
heard at n distance, sounded llko "A
loo," but the English, who alwuys put
nn II on wherever they pooslbly can.
put It on tho words "A loo," and when
wolf hunting shouted "Ha-loo." This
form we uso when we cull "Hello," as
no, word has been found that carries so
far or so well as hello. For this rea-
-m, ardr ai -
son It fa tho accepted form of tho toh
phono companies tho world over.
Wnshington Htnr.
The Unrenalinlilo Coin.
PInce n boy with his bnck ngnlnst th
wnll, his heel standing firmly ngnlnst
It. Lay n half dollar on tbo floor In
front of him, about a foot distant from
Ids toes, nnd tell him It Is his If ho
can pick It up without moving his heels
from ngnlnst tho wall. In vain will
he try to get tho coin under tho condi
tions prescribed.
Pr)h nektf for nor.
Don't put up with shabby ties, boys.
Von nro nevsr too young to think a bit
about your looks, and though most
folks detest tho boy wlioae heart Is In
hi clothes Instead of the placo It ought
to be, It's worth money and a reputa
tion to keep clean and neat When n
tlo gets shabby throw It In tbo wasto
basket and begin on another.
Mcufennnt In KaUcr'a llodrnraaril I
Over .1rn Vatit Tittl.
Undoubtedly tho tallest soldier In tbo
world I Joicf Handel, who has recent
ly been made n lieutenant In tho Kai
ser's famous bodyguard. During tho
past year nnd before ho became a sol
dier ho was exhibited under the simple
natno of "der lango Josef' In, the Berlin
Panopjtlkon and other places of Inter
cut In the largo cities of Germany as
the tallest youth on earth, a distinction
to which ho Is easily entitled, says tbo
Cincinnati Enquirer.
Handel Is not 22 years old. yet ho
stands 7 feet 8 Inches In his stocking.
Though he wss earning a big salary be
did not hesitate a moment when tbo
Kaiser called him to bis bodyguard In
1'otsdam. He would never hare been
given the honor If the Kaiser's physi
cians bad not pronounced him perfect
ly projwrtloned physically and of sound
health. A rcroarkablo fact Is that Han
del's parents, who lire In Leipzig, are
people of ordinary size, as are also bis
brothers and sisters, of whom thero
are seven. Handel makes a pictur
esque figure In his guard uniform and
the high helmet makes blm look a veri
table Goliath. Frederick the Great
would hare given bis best pipe to havo
added such a giant to his guard of tall
Proof of luaanitr.
come upon the auto
ppnktbebrow of
says to UKr.chauiTeur.
"Broken- downf
"No, sir," he responds.
"Out of gasoline?"
"No, sir. We hare plenty."
Tire punctured!"
"No, sir. The tires aro In perfect
"Iost your way?"
"No, sir. Tho country hereabouts Is
very familiar."
"Dropped something from the autof
"No, sir. Nothing of the sort"
"Then why are you standing hero?
Why nro you not shooting down tho
hill and across the level at a terrific
"I do not care to do that," says tho
owner of the machine, who has been
silent until this moment "I bad my
nuto stopped hero so thnt I mhiht enjoy
tho magnificent view from this eleva
tion." With a frightened glance at hlra.. wo
turn nnd hasten to tho nearest town, to
warn tho officials that nn evidently In
sane person Is nt large In nn automo
bile. Kansas City Independent
Jeffrraon Wm n Child Actor.
On the death of bis father, at Moblto,
Ala., young Jefferson and bis sister
wero engaged by the local manager to
play children's parts, sing comic duets
nnd appear In fancy dances. In addi
tion to this, ho said: "I was to grind
colors In tho paint room -'assistant ar
tist' I was called on the bills and
mako myself generally useful, for
which services wo were each to recolvo
Jfi per week."
At 13 years of age he was the chief
support of a widowed mother whom
mlsfortuno had reduced "from lending
lady to landlady." In reviewing tho
hardship of hla early life, ono cannot
but feel how much ho deserved tho suc
cess which crowned his later years, nor
Is It to bo wondered that, onco achiev
ing success, he never Jeopardized It by
experimenting with now plays so long
na tho old ones showed evory erldenco
of popular favor. In this rough school
of experience, then, where ho Indeed
mado himself "generally useful," Jeffer
son learned tho art of acting,, and, asj
well, tho art of painting. Froiicls Wil
son lu Scrlbnor's.
Knmy War to CarveJ
Freddy lived in a Iwardlng-houso
near whero they had been excavating
for (ho subway. Ono day when ho aavr
his mother struggling with n particular
ly tough steak tho boarders were con
vulsed to hear him pipe up;'
"Mamma, why don't you blast it!"-
New York Press.
Kalae I'rorerb.
Psuilth You can't oat your cako and
havo it, too, you know.
KJonea Tho dlckons I can't! Yoa
ought to try some of my wlfo'a cake .
you can eat It and It'll stay with you
for four days. Cleveland Leader,
That'll Do.
Stage Manager That carrot-haired
"stipe" la a perfect pumpkin fieadi
Low Comedian Yes, he's a' vegotj
ble supe, Cleveland Leader,