Newberg graphic., January 02, 1913, Page 6, Image 6

THE NEWBERG URAPHIC
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Butterick Building, New Y ork City
16
THERE’S no STRADDLING
the lumber question here. When
we say we sell the highest qual­
ity, we mean just that and noth­
ing else. Deal here and you get
a square deal. You don’ t have
to be a lumber expert to buy
here to the best advantage. Ask
those who know.
M . H . F IN N E Y
306 N. Main S t..
Or.
Happy New Year
FALSE ALARM OF FIR E
HIS GOOD GUESS.
TAILORS IN A TEMPER.
A M l Always to Bs Mat Promptly so
Board Ship.
How tk* 8ohoolm ««tor Calculated the
It was on board the Northern
Light, says Captain Os bon in “ A
Sailor o f Fortune,” that a false
alarm o f fire was sounded end dis­
aster prevented only by prompt
promp ao-
tion. A passenger, looking c down
through the boiler hatch, aew the
red painted boiler fronts and,
ing the flame like «d o r amid a cloud
o f steam shouted “ First”
Im ­
mediately the whole vessel was In
an uproar, and a dangerous panic
was im m inent I was one o f the un­
derofficers.
The climax came when the quar­
so* umow s saw
oow a se minister
iismsne^i o v f the
termaster
pel on the rail trying to ] lower tha
bow o f one o f the snip’s boat*.
ran to him and ordered him to
oome down on deck. The minister
paid no attention, and I seised his
ooattail to drag him down by force.
Perhaps it was an old coa t for
the seams parted, and a second later
I had the ministerial coattail in my
hands. He came down then. He
was angry and was likewise a spec­
tacle to look upon.
He started to call an indignation
meeting, but most o f the passengers
had recovered from their fright by
this time and were inclined to be
merry at the reverend gentlemen’s
expense.
He went raging to the captain,
who summoned me to appear,
came, still carrying the coattail in
my hand.
“ Mr. Oabon,” he said, "what are
your orders in case o f a false alarm
of fire?”
“ My orders,” I said, “ are W stop
it by any means necessary. I may
knock a man down, throttle him or
split him wide open:
The captain turned to the irate
minister.
“ Those are Mr. Osbon’s o:
he said. “ You are fortunate that
it was only your coat that was split
open.”
The danger from the false alarm
o f fire on shipboard ia second only
to the real thing and is always a
peril to be met promptly.
Men wonder at what they do not
understand, but a seeming marvel
often becomes absurdly simple
when it is explained. Many yean
ago a schoolmaster in the course o f
his travels had occasion to stay for
a day or two at a country tavern.
As he sat in the publio room with
a dozen other persona, evidently na­
tives o f the place, there came along
a man with a fat hog that he was
driving to m arket Leaving the
animal outside, he entered the inn
and joined the little company. Sev­
eral of the latter went to tho win­
dow to look at tho hog.
“ That's % fine pig you’ve got
there, neighbor,” remarked one.
“ Do you know what he’ll weigh f"
“ Yea, air,” returned the pig’s
owner. “ I had him on the scales
just before I started o u t What do
you guess he’ll weigh?”
The questioner, thus questioned
in turn, looked at the pig carefully
aud made a guess. The owner turn­
ed to the rest of the company and
said:
“ Will not somebody else give a
guess? Just for the fun o f it let
everybody have a try.”
The proposal met with favor.
One after another the men eyed the
critically and after due con­
sideration gave their estimates of
his weight. The schoolmaster, who
seemed deeply absorbed in his own
thoughts, alone took no part in the
contest. But he was not to be let
Thay Rasa In Riot Against a Play That
Satirised Thair Art,
In 1769 Samuel Foote, the Eng­
lish dramatist, had produced in
Lopdea a burlesque, the author of
which has never been discovered,
entitled “ The Tailors— A Tragedy
For Warm Weather.” Dowton, the
actor, announced the revival of
this piece for his benefit. As the
title implies, it was a satire upon
the sartorial craft, and upon tha
bills being issued an indignation
meeting was convened by tbs
knights o f the needle, who vowed to
oppose the performance by might
ana main.
Menacing letters were sent to
Dowton telling him that 7,000 tai­
lors would attend to his piece, and
one, who signed himself “ Death,”
added that 10,000 men could be
found if neceesanr. These threats
were laughed at by the actors, but
when night came it was discovered
that the craft were in earnest and
that with few exceptions they had
contrived to secure every seat in
the house, while a mob without still
squeezed for admission. The mo­
ment Dowton appeared upon the
stage there was a hideous uproar,
and some one threw a pair o f shears
st him.
Not a word would the rioters
listen to, nor would they accept
any compromise in the way o f
changing the piece. Within howled
and hissed without intermission
hundreds o f exasperated tailors;
outside howled and bellowed thou­
sands of raging tailors, who at­
tempted to storm the house. So
formidable did the riot wax that a
magistrate had to be sent for and
special constables called out, but
these were helpless against over­
whelming odds, so a troop o f life
guards was ultimately summoned,
who, after making sixteen prisoners,
pnt the rest to flight.
‘•Home* In Our Language.
In this, our first message o f the New Year, we wish
to express our appreciation to the public, for their patron­
age during the past year, and o f what we value even
more, their confidence and cordial good will. We realize
that the public’ s interests and our interests are mutual
and that whatever helps one helps the other.
In extending our thanks to the public for their patron­
age during the past year we pledge ourselves that during
the coming year we will use our most earnest efforts to
merit the continuation o f the pleasant relations which have
existed in the past
Accept our sincere wishes that the New Year may
bring you happiness and prosperity.
Southern Pacific Co.
The Qraphic Job Printing Department
is the best equipped in Newberg for turning out high-class printing
at lowest possible prices. I f you want estimates on anything in the
printing line from a visiting card to a large book or poster, call up
White 33. There’ s no job too large or too small for us to execute.
W e ¡Print to ¡Please at the ¡Prices that ¡Please
A LOST ART.
Crvd* W ay In W hich tha Old T lira n
Moved a Giant Statu«.
“ Not long ago there was a lecture
delivered in St. Louis on the lost
arts before a small, select gather­
ing,” aavs a local scholar, “ in the
course of which the lecturer strove
very hard to show how many arts
and sciences, totally unknown to us,
were possessed by the ancients.
“ I was particularly impressed by
one statement concerning the im­
mense size of some of the blocks of
stone used in the temples of Baal-
bee and the pyramids of Egypt and
the enormous weight of the great
granite blocks from which were
hewn the giant statues of the kings
and gods. Some of these blocks are
computed to weigh seventy-five or
eighty tons, and the lecturer inti­
mated that the ancienta must have
possessed engineering machinery
superior to our own to be able to
lift and transport atones o f such
Immense siae and weight.
“ Aa a fact, tha great cranes em­
ployed in our gunnery and armor
te works would pick up such
cks and carry them off as easily
id quickly as though they were o f
wood.
K
“ There ia no mystery at all about
the way in which these blocks were
moved. In several histories of
Egypt there are reproduced [pictures
found on the wall o f an Egyptian
tomb which represents the moving
o f one o f the giant statues. Scores
o f ropes are attached to it. and hun­
dred» o f men stand ready waiting
for the signal to pull. Tne statue
is on a plank road and rests on roll­
ers. Men with jars o f oil are greas­
ing the rollers, taking them out be­
hind and placing them in position
in front. The superintendent of the
work stands on the pedestal with a
trumpeter by his side. In the next
picture he gives the signal, the
trumpeter sounds, and everybody
pulls for dear life, while overseers
run up and down the line with
whip# in their hands making sore
the pulling is well done.
“ This is one o f the lost arts, and
no one need regret that it is lost.
W* accomplish by ingenuity and
skill what the old timers did by
brute force. It is not probable that
anything o f veins has aver bean
lost, and. what is more to the pur­
pose, we know a hundred, perhaps a
thousand, useful things o f which the
ancients had no conception.” — 8t.
' Louis Globe-Democrat.
In no other language, according
to the London Telegraph, is there
a word expressing the ideas and as­
sociations which are aroused at the
sound o f the simple yet heart touch­
ing word “ home.” A Frenchman
once translated Cardinal Newman’s
hymn, “ Lead, Kindly Light,” and in
ms hands the beautiful line “ The
night is dark, and I am far from
home,” became “ La nuit est sombre,
et je suis loin de mon foyer,” the
translator having been obliged to
use for home the French word
which describes the green room of
a theater. The Italian and Span­
ish “ casa,” the German “ haus”
their “ heim” is too general to have
any particular value— and the Rus­
sian “ doma’VaU refer to. a building
o f some kind or other and have
none o f the memories and associa­
tions that cluster round the precious
English word.
Famous Boy«,
A boy used to crush the flowers
to get their color and painted the
white side o f his fathers cottage in
Tyrol with all aorta of pictures,
which the mountaineer gazed at as
wonderful. He was the great artist
Titian.
An old painter watched a little
fellow who amused himself making
drawings o f his pot and brushes,
easel and stool, and said, “ That boy
will beat me some day.” So he did,
for he was Michelangelo.
A German boy was reading a
blood and thunder novel. Right in
the midat o f it he said to himself:
“ Now this will never do. I get too
much excited over i t 1 can’t study
so well after i t So here goes I”
And he flung the book out into the
river. He was Fichte, the great Ger­
man philosopher.
--hr"
QuMk Wit.
The late Sir James Allport, then
Mr. Allport, when manager of the
Midland line, once visited a small
station in the north, and, after be­
ing assiduously waited upon by the
porter on duty on alighting from
the train, he offered the attentive
official half a crown.
The man promptly pocketed the
gratuity, whereupon the manager
inquired:
“ Do you know who I am, my
man?”
“ Certainly, air,” was the ready
reply, “ Mr. Allport, sir, fellow serv­
ant of the company, sir. Course, I
don’t take tips from the general
public, sir.” — London Answers.
Tha Sublime Porto.
The phrase “ sublime porte,” fre­
quently used to denote the govern­
ment o f the Turkish empire or the
country itself, is derived from the
French end means lofty gate. It
had its origin in the gateway of the
outer court o f the seraglio at Con­
stantinople, from which justice
«opposed to be administered.
W eight o f tho Pig.
off.
-'■'“ Say, friend,” the owner of the
iig urged, “ aren’t we going to hear
rom you ?”
The pedagogue, who perhaps had
never in his life looked attentively
at a pig, rose, went to the window
and gazqd out at this one. He de­
liberated for a moment, then, with
modest hesitation, named a certain
number o f pounds.
At hearing it the eyes and mouth
of the pig’s owner opened wide in
astonishment.
"Waal, I swan!” he exclaimed.
“ You’re the cham pion! All the
others guessed either over or under,
hut you’ve hit it almost to a pound.”
Every due stared at the school­
, master admiringly, but no one was
shrewd enough to tell how he had
been able to make so good a guess.
It had not been a lucky hit, although
he could have done quite as well
without seeing the pig. He knew
nothing abont swine, but he knew a
good deal about figures. Having
heard the guesses of eleven more or
less expert judges, he had added to­
gether their figures, divided the
sum by .eleven and “ guessed” the
result.— Youth’s Companion.
H . W as Only Beating Tima.
The conductor of the band was a
ragtime enthusiast. Violently he
"beat time, leaning far over, now to­
ward one instrument, now toward
another, stamping his foot in his
paroxysms o f musical fervor and
seeming about to spring from his
box ana carry the excitement o f his
own soul to one o f another o f the
perspiring musicians.
Mike followed his every move
with fascinated eyes until the close
of the m elody; then with a disap­
pointed air he started to leave.
How did ye like it, Mike ?” asked
Jerry.
Come away. Jerry,” said Mike in
disgust
“ Oi’ve been watchin’ him for half
an hour, aud lie hasn’t hit one of
thim yet!”
N a p *l*M Persuaded.
A mother sought the pardon o f
her son from the first Napoleon.
The emperor said it was his second
offense and justice demanded his
death.
“ I don’t ask for justice,” said the
mother. “ I plead for mercy.”
“ But,” said the emperor, “ he
does not deserve mercy.
Sire,” crifil the mother, “ it
would not be mercy if he deserved
it, and mercy is all I ask fo ri”
“ Well, then,” said Napoleon, “ I
will have m ercy!”
And her son was saved.
Tha Fathar of All Novela.
| A great branch of literature, un­
doubtedly the most widely popular
and one in which England showed
the way to the world, is the novel.
In the year 1740 readers were de-
ighted with a new kind of book, a
arose romance not of legend, but
of their own day and manners. It
was the pioneer novel, was called
“ Pamela,” the work of Samuel
Richardson, a London printer, and
the great euccees it met with soon
wrought forth a host of othen.
A Good Laugh.
Every hearty laugh tends to pro-
ig life, as it makes the blood flow
more rapidly and gives a new and
different stimulus to all the organs
o f the body from what is in fores st
the other times. The saying “ Laugh
and grow fat” has therefore a foun­
dation in fa c t
u
Centura and Hie Dainty Pupil.
An old pupil o f Conture told how
the master came into his school­
room one day when the model was
in exceptionally good condition, the
light especially fine and the cir­
cumstances o f the seance altogether
auspicious. As he entered one of
the students got up and went to the
tub o f water in the corner, leaving
all the rest buried in their work.
“ Whet are you going to do ?” asked
Conture roughly.
The student
showed his hands, which had some
paint on them, end replied that he
wss going to wash them. Conture
dabbed ms thumb in some paint on
Hie palette o f the nearest student
end made a smear on the dainty pu­
pil’s forehead. “ You’d bettor wash
your face, too,” he said. The face
washing was the last act o f the
students when they bad finished
their work for the day. The dainty
pupil took the hint to heart, apolo­
gized and sat down at his easel
without visiting the tub. I f he had
not done so be would never have en­
tered the school again.'
Praiwd to D«ath.
r
CO Ù80ŒS
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Fair Maples
Fruit Farm
Apples, Prunes, Plums, Peaches,
Cherries, Grapes in their season.
J. W ATSON BAKER, Prop.
Owgon
Phone While 161
Yamhill County Abstract Co.
¡J. H. GIBSON, Mgr.
The only Abstract Books in
Yamhill County
M c M innville .
O regon
The Ice Man
Can’t make stale groceries
palatable. Better make
your purchases o f
J. L . Van Blaricom
,
who carries a nice clean
stock of everything that
is good to eat
________ ._'_________ •_________
Call W hite 114 and you
will get Prompt S e r v i c e
For A W arm Overcoat
com and see
MUELLER, The Tailor
He makes them fer ladies and
gents. His samples are winners.
Opposite P. 0 .
Phone Black 32
N.wberg, Oregon
♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦•••♦eeeeeeeeee»
» NEWBERG - i
i Iron W o rk s |j
J
An English court has sentenced a
woman to imprisonment because
! she refused to speak during a trial.
The old penalty for remaining mute
Foundry and M achine
nnder similar conditions was being
W o rk .
pressed to death. The form of sen­
P ulleys, Shafting and
tence set forth, “ The prisoner shall
be laid in some low, dark house,
M achine Screw s
where he shall lie naked on the
earth, and one arm shall be drawn
Sixth and Blaine Sts.
to one quarter of the house with a
cord ana the other arm to another
quarter, and in the same manner
let it be done with his legs, and let
there be laid upon his body iron and
stone, aa much as he can bear—o r
more.” There the man had to lie.
On the following day be waa given
three morsels of bread without wa­
ter, on the following water, but no Semi-Weekly Oregon Journal,
one year.................................... fi.
bread. And this was his diet until
Graphic, one y e a r ......................... 1.50
be died.
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M wioo’i Fans.
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THE SEMI-WEEKLY
j Montezuma heard that the Span­
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visit him he sent for goldsmiths Publishes the latest and most complete
and lapidaries and ordered, amon telegraphic news o f the world; gives re­
liable market reports, as it is published
other gifts which were to be offer
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and is, corrected to date for each issue.
mented with a sun and moon of It also has a page of special matter for
highly polished gold.
Like the the farm and home, an entertaining
Japanese and other ancient nations, story page and a page or more o f comic
week, and it goea to the subscriber
the Aztecs evidently considered the each
twice every w e e k - 104 times a year.
fan an emblem of authority, for
T h e G rap h ic
they generally placed it in the hands
of Ometeuctli, god of paradise, and Gives all the lot .1 news and happenings
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m e two papers make a splendid com­
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Puzzled Grant.
your subscripts to the Graphic.
Grant and Sherman were dis­
We can alao give our subscribers a
cussing the plans o f a campaign good clubbing offer for the Daily and
when a third general, a brigadier, Sunday ,or8unday JoumaI, in connec­
tion with the Graphic.
entered the tent— a good soldier,
hut notorious for his carelessness
as to his personal appearance. The
brigadier finished nis errand and
went out. General G n a t pulled
upon hie cigar for a few minutes in
B unding Contractors
eflenoe and then laid. “ Sherman, 1
wonder whom that man gala to wear
Estimates Furnished
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Oregon Journal
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& Son
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