Newberg graphic., December 22, 1904, Image 7

h
>
N o A p p e t it e
M ma * lots o f viUHty, vigor
o r to n e , and Is o fte n a pro­
o f prostrating sick-
This is why ft is
--------. The hast thing
yon can do is to taka tbs
graat alterative and tonic
H ood’s Sarsaparilla
Which
c
... „_____
l '- ‘ .
The** a rt very few things that *•-
cape the notice of college student*
when they appear en masse. This was
demonstrated at an uptown theater the
other evening when a stirring melo­
drama w as being enacted, says the
Philadelphia Record. A group of ten
‘i students occupied the front row o f the
* balcony. Just below them sat a party
* of young women. It was when the
' beautiful heroine was about to be
thrust out on the mercy of a pitiless
world that tragedy w as,turned Iqto
comedy. True to feminine emotional
( nature, the feelings of the group of
women aforesaid were so wrought up
that tears began to flow. There was a
hasty struggle for handkerchiefs, a
deep dive Into pockets and bags and
then a pause. Only one of the six
girls had bad the foresight to provide
herself with a handkerchief.
With a sympathetic glance of com­
prehension she wiped the tears ffom
her own eyes and then passed the bit
o f linen along. One by one the weep­
ing maidens dabbed their eyes with the
handkerchief and then it was smug­
gled back'to the owner and the game
of progressive handkerchief was begun
again. The students saw all this, and
one of them took a handkerchief fiom
his pocket to wipe aw sy Imaginary
tears and passed It along the line. Loud
„ -sobs’* drew attention to them. In a
moment the house was convulsed with
laughter, and It w as only after mana­
gerial interference that the by-play
w as stopped and the six maidens with
the one handkerchief were spared fur­
ther mortification.
Doing G reat W ork.
Ftorirant, Mo., Dee.~19.— <Special)
— That Dood’ a Kidney P ills are doing
a greet work in coring the more terri­
ble forms of Kidney Disease, such as
Bright’s Disease, Dropsy and Diabetes,
everybody knows.
But it must also
be noted that they are doing a still
greater work in wiping out theousands
of cases of the earlier stages of Kidney
Disease. Take for instance Mrs. Peter
Bartesn, ol this place. 8he says:
" I have been subject to pains in nry
back and knees tor about three years,
but sinoe I have been taking Dodd’s
Kidney Pills I have been entirely
cured . '*
'
Others here tell similar stories. In
fact, in this part of Missouri there are
scores of people who have cured the
early symptoms of Kidney Disease with
Dodd’s Kidney P ills.
The use of the
Great American Kidney Remedy thus
saved not only the lives of Kidney Dis­
ease victims, but thousands of other
Americans from y e a n of sufferings.
Uses fbr R o lle r Skate*.
Little Johnny— Bay, pa. will you buy
me a pair of roller skates?
Pa— W hat In the name of common
sense do you want with a pair of roller
skates?
Little Johnny— Why, pa, I want to
use them for mowing the lawn In sum­
mer and shoveling snow in winter.
W hat else could I use them for, pa —
Cincinnati Enquirer. <
A man should weigh 2t> pounds for ev­
ery foot of his height.
RAM’S HORN BLASTS.
W arning Kotos Catting tha W icks* to
jgsass tsars.
BILK hat on soma
beads la like a new
roof
upon
an
bars.
Future possibili­
ties d e t e r m i n e
present facts.
He who follows
In faith need fear
no failure.
Tour character
can be strong with­
out being sour.
It takes mors
than an accent to make eloquence.
Feelings go a long way toward mak­
ing facts.
A waspish disposition gets no honey
from the rock.
The glory of riches does not lead to
riches in glory.
Only a frozen piety can be bound
down to a form. '
God often says, “ W alt;” but He nev­
er says, “ Worry."
Gazing st Heaven keeps some people
from going there.
The sermon need not be silly to bo
United to the child.
Nothing cools off a meeting quicker
than a hot scolding.
When a man winks at himself the
devil nods with him.
The sense of smartness l a i u r e to
make it rrtan shallow.
■ **'
The love that lightens another's
lightens my own load.
£
Our mercy is good, but Hls tender
mercy Is many times better.
The beer that makes the brewer is
the beer that makea the bums.
One little thing well done la better
thau many great things but begun.
It Is better to win man’s condeniba-
tlon than ths devil's commendation.
Cbriat la preparing a place for those
who are preparing a people for Hljn.
People who spend their Uvea pack­
ing tnelr trunks never go anywhere.
HOPE
FOR
THE
SICK
ICWM08U6BIPPE.
ietta A . B. Marsh, fr«9 W“.
„ f .oa Angeles, Ckl., President
Woman’s Benevolent Ase’n, writes:
“ I suffered w ith la grippe for seven
w eeks, and nothing I could do or take
helped me until I tried Peruna.
“ I felt at once that I had at last se­
cured the right medicine and 1 kept
steadily improving.
W itbin three
weeka I was fully restored, and I am
glad that 1 gave that truly great rem­
edy a trial. I w ill never be without
it again.”
In a letter dated Angnat 81, 1904, Mrs.
Marab aays: ” 1 have never yet heard
the efficacy of Peruna questioned. W#
■ till am it. I traveled through Ken­
tucky and Tennessee three y ea n ago,
EM PRESS OF R U SSIA
w hen I found Parana doing its good
work. Much of it ia being need h e n
Her I s r l r Training mad Her
Chnractnr on the Throne.
slao.” — Henrietta A . 8. Marsh.
Address Dr. Hartman, President of
When one bears stories o f the gentle
kindneae of the Czarina and of the Tbs Hartman Banitarinm, Colnmnna,
deep and earnest interest that she Ohio.
feels In all that concerns the welfare
and happiness of her people, one can­
Nothing B at the Truth.
not but remember that she Is the
“Yea,” said Mr. Storinington Barns,
daughter of that Princess Alice whose “ we did well In the W est A t a one-
sweet disposition and winning ways night, strand In Arizona we played to a
so endeared her to the English nation $10,000 house.”
before she left her native land for her
“Say, what are you giving me?”
husband's home In Hesse.
queried Mr. W alker Ties. \
' “The education and training of (he
“ Facts,” answered the great footsore
future Czarina and her sisters were tragedian. “The one man who com­
their mother's most serious considera­ prised the audience waa said to be
tion.” says the writer, “and she fre­ worth fullv that amount/]_
quently corresponded with Queen Vic­
M others w ill find Mr*. W inslow's Boo thin f
toria on the subject. T strive to bring
the b a it rem edy to use lo r th eir children
up my children free from pride in d Syrup
u rin g the teeth in g period.
their position,’ ths grand duchess
wrote on one occasion. *1 feel bow all-
Hero.
*
important It la for princes and prin­
Dusty Dennis— Ah, lady, I have fac­
cesses to know they have the double ed the dangen of fire many a time.
The Lady— Were you a fireman, my
duty of living for « th e n and of being
an example of goodness and modesty,’ poor man?
Dusty Dennis— No’m; I smoked a ci­
and we have ample proof that these
gar butt In a haystack.
lessona have not been wasted.
“The Csarlna'a youth waa passed In
Plso s Cur* (h s remedy for coughs, oolda
the most frugal manner. Bhe was
trained to have aa few wants ns possi­ and consumption. Try it. Price28 cents,
St druggists.
t
ble and to help herself— a most neces­
sary thing, for her ' father's means
.Me Inquiry.
“ Allow me, Mr. Blfklns,’ mid the
were very limited. Bhe had to learn
to dress herself without the assistance hostess to s late arrival, “ to Introduce
of a maid, and was taught to take the Captain de Jones, a man who has
greatest care of her frocks, many of faced death In a score of battles.”
which were made by her mother's own
“ Pleased to meet you, captain,” said
hands. Her nurse and governess were Bukins. “ By the way. are you a mili­
both English, and she paid many visits tary or football captain?”
to her august grandmother, both at Bal­
moral and Osborne, where she Is still
remembered for her bright and win­
ning ways. These early visits to Eng­
land made a great Impression on th i
yonng princess’ mind, and in dress and
— ■ AS* she still retains truces of their
Influence.”— Lady's Realm.
GET-RICH-QUICK GAME.
Columbus, Ohio, May 19,
Some four year* ago I waa a
from import Mood and a general rum
down condition of the system. I bad no
appetite, waa losing flesh, and had aa all-
got»* tired feeling that made me misera­
ble. I began the as* of 8 . 8. 8., and
after taking seven or eight bottle* my akin
waa cleared of all eruptions and took on a
ruddy, healthy glow that assured me that
blood had been restored to its nor­
mal, healthy eooditioo. My appetite
restored, as I could eat anything put be­
fore me, and aa I regained my appetite
I increased in weight, and that ’Hired feel­
ing” which worried me so much disap­
peared, and I was once again my old self.
I heartily reeommend 8. 8. 8. aa the
best blood purifier and tonic made, and
strongly advise its use to all those in need
of such medicine.
V icto * S tubs ins .
Cor. Barthmsn and Washington Aves.
Wheeling, W. V ., May a8, 1901.
M y system was rundown and my joints
.ached and panted me considerably. I had
used 8. 8. 8. before and knew what it
waa, so I purchased a bottle of it and have
taken several bottles and the achea and
p*ina are gone, my bUod haa been class­
ed and my general health built up. I can
testify to It aa a blood purifier and tonic.
*533 Market 8t.
J ohh C. Brain.
If you have say
aymptoau of dis­
ordered b lo o d
Writ# ua sad our
phyaldaas w i l l
advise you he*.
Our book oa
I skim
1 sent free,
Ths Swift tguolfl« Oewpaay, Attests, Ik
Sharpers Set the Ropra to I»e-
cotv* Unwary Investors.
Bo In six weeks you see a handsome­
ly furnished set of offices down in
the Wall street neighborhood, with
"The Goleonda Gold Bond and Invest­
ment Company,” In gilt letters on the
door.
It coat na $800 for office rent and
first payment on fnrnitnre, $1,800
more went for printing and advertla-'
lng. Atterbury knew hls business.
“Three months to a minute we’U last,”
says he. “ A day longer than that and
w e’ll have to either go under or go
under an alias. By that time we ought
to clean up $80,000. And then a money
belt and a lower berth for me, and the
yellow Journals and the furniture rneu
can pick the honSa."
Our ads. did the work.
“Country
weeklies and Washington hand press
dallies, of course.” aays I, when he
w as ready to make contracts
“ Man,” saya Atterbury,“na Its adver­
tising manager yon would cause \a
LImburger cheese factory to remain
undiscovered during a hot summer.
The game we’re after la right here In
New York and Brooklyn and the Har­
lem -reading-rooms. They're the people
that to# street-car fenders and the
'Answers to Correspondents’ column
and the pickpocket notices are made
for. We want onr ada. In the biggest
city dallies, top of column, next to
editorials on radium and pictures of
the girl doing health exercises.”
Pretty soon the money begins to roll
In. Back didn’t have to pretend to
be busy; bta desk was piled high up
with money erders and checks and
greenbacks. People began to drop In
the office and buy stock every day-—
McClure's MagasUm.
Many women are denied the 1
happiness of children through
derangement of the generative
organs.
M rs. Beyer advises
women to use Lydia E. Pink-
ham 's Vegetable Compound.
" D r i b M i a P m a i w ; — I suffered
w ith stomach complaint for years. I
got so bad that I could s o t carry my
children but five months, then would
have a miscarriage. The last time I
became pregnant, my husband got me
to take L y d ia E . P ln k h a m ’ s V e g e ­
table C o m p o u n d . After taking the
first bottle I w as relieved of ths sick­
ness o f stomach, and began to feel bet­
ter In every way. I continued Its use
sad waa enabled to carry my baby to
m atarity. I now have a nioa baby
girl, and eaa work better than I ever
oould before. I am Ilk* a new woman."
— Mas. l u n B a ra s, M & Second 8 t,
Meriden, Conn. — 95000 f~f*t if •rtfimmi of
F R E E M E D IC A L A D V IC E TO
W OM AN.
Don’t hesitate t o w rite to K n .
Plnkham . She wtty understand
your case perfectly, and w ill treat
you with kindness. H er advice
Is free, and the address ia Lynn,
No wom an ever regr e tted
Hie Bphar*.
Friend— Do yea sever take a v i e s
on. doctor?
Doctor— Very seldom. I'm kept bavy
all summer doctoring people who have
sen taking vacations.— Pack.
Ayers
Oora— W hat la your favorite pet ia
the animal world? Dora— Man.— Chi­
cago Chronicle.
“ What are yon plunging back In the
water -for, Pat?
You Just sw a n
ashore." “Share, Oi had to save meeelf
fint; now Ol’m going back to fetch
M otts."
Teacher— Now, Tommy, If you bad
twelve plums and your Util* brother
asked yon for one-half of mem, bow
many would yon have left? Tommy
(promptly)— Twel v a
Mra Backlots— Bo your servant girl
has left you again? Mra 8ubbube—
Yea Mrs. Backlots— What waa the
matter? Mra Bnbbube— Bhe didn’t like
the w ay I did her work.— Philadelphia
Presa
Bright Boy— I’m a chip o f the old
block, ain't I, pa? Fond Father— Y ea
my son. B. B.— An’ you’re the bead o’
the family, ain’t yon, pa? F. F.— Yea
my son. B. B.— Then you’re a block-
bead, ain’t yon, pa?
Clara overheard her parents talking
about Bible namea “ Ia my name in
the Bible?” she asked. “ No; dear."
“Didn’t God make me ” “Y e a ” “Then
why didn’t he say something about
it?” — Harper's Magazine, v
m
Fair Passenger— Won’t fhf) have a
paper, air? Hoggly— Wby-^er— what
makea you offer me a paper? Fair Pas­
senger— I thought you’d be more com­
fortable while women are standing If
you could hide your face!— Ex.
Teacher— The sentence, “ My father
had money,” la In the past tense. Now,
Mary, what tense would you be speak­
ing In If you said, “ My father baa
money 7" Little Mary— Oh, that would
be pretense.— London Tit-Bit*.
Policeman— Why, my little dear. If
yon can’t tell me your mother's name
or where she Uvea how are we to find
her? Little Girl (lost while out shop­
ping)— Jea pnt me la a shop window
an'-mamma’ll be sure to see me.
“ W hat is a counter-irritant?” asked
Mra Smith era. “A counter-irritant”
replied 8 ml therm, “ la a woman who
makes the clerk poll down everything
from the shelves for ¿wo hours and
then bays four cents’ worth of hair­
pin*.”
“ Never mind,” said the friend, sooth­
ingly. “you’ll w ake up seme morning,
and find yourself famous.”
“ Not
much!” growled the pessimistic poet
“It would be Just my lack to oversleep
myself that morning.’’— Philadelphia
Press.
Mother— What! Fighting
again?
Buch a black eye! I f you’d only fol­
low the lead o f the minister’s little
boy-------- Tommy— I did try to, but
hq led agen wld his right, an’ dat’a
where he biffed m a— Philadelphia
Ledger.
,,
\
Professor— Robert do you know the
meaning of the word precipice, or
bluff? Robert— Yesslr. Professor— Yon
may give me an example. Robert— I
can lick yon with one band. Profes­
sor— Sir!
W hat’s that?
Robert—
That*a a bluff.
M ra Dearborn— Were yon married
in Jane? M ra Wabash— Yes; once on
the fifth, once on the eighth and on
the tenth, and another time on the
sixteenth; but I’ve switched off to Oc­
tober; that’s my marrying month nowl
-—Yonkers Statesman.
(
Shocked Mother— My boy, my boy,
w hat became of that last piece of pie I
left In the cupboard and told you not
to disturb? Little Oscar— I eated It
Shocked Mother— And what would yon
call an act like that? Little Oscar—
Disturbing the piece, I suppose.— Buf­
falo Commercial.
Husband— Why do yon scold the
botcher? It Isn’t hls fault that the
meat comes to the table all dried up.
Scold foe cook. Wife— I don’t dare to;
but I’m In hopes that if I keep on
scolding the butcher, he’ll get mad.
and come around and scold the cook.—
New York Weekly.
Kllmore— After all. Btedman Isn’t so
bad a fellow. He came to m a man
fashion, and took back all the things he
had said against my people. Barman
— Did it voluntarily? “ Practically*that
rt la true I threatened to shoot him on
sight If he didn’t retract; but that waa
only a matter o f detail.”— Boston
Transcript
Church— Don’t yon dislike to smell
the odor from those automobiles?
Gotham— No, I like to smell I t “ You
do?” “ I certainly do. You know, yon
can’t amell the odor until the machine
haa gone by.” “I know I t ” “ Well,
If the machine has gone by, and you
can amell at all, you’re pretty sure that
you haven’t been struck.” — Yonkers
Statesman.
“ Hallo, Godger, I ’ve been looking
for yon a week. Couldn’t And you high
or low. Met a friend of yours the
other day. He’s been talking about
you, and I felt It my duty to tell you
w hat he said.” “Ah, well. I don’t car*
to hear what he said. I know It waa
something disagreeable.” “ How do you
know that?” “ Because you are so
anxloos to tall It. Good morning."
Law yer— You have taken your oath,
and I want yon to answer each of my
Questions
honestly.
Witness— Yea
sir. Lawyer— W hat la your ocupa-
tion? Witness I am a driver. Law ­
yer— Do yon drive a wagon? Witness
— No, air; I do n o t Law yer— Now be
careful, and remember that you are
on your oath. Yon admit that yon are
a driver; now, honestly, don’t you drive
a wagon? Witness— No. sir; I drive
a horse.— Albany Evening Journal.
TO CURE A COLD IN Olfe DAY
Take Lexattv* Bromo «M e le e T O M * A ll d n e
■la refund U m n o e q IM I MU* io cum. M W . .
You can hardly And • home
without its A y e r 's C h e r r y
Pectoral. Parents know what
It does for children: break«
__ Sim ilar bet Different.
“Did yoa ever attend • reeking
school?" asked foe Chicago girl.
“ No." replied her Boeton cousin, “but
I graduated from a college o f ,
omy.”
Cherry
Pectoral
FIRE
up a c o ld in a ■ i n i I anight,
w ard« o ff bronchitis, prevents
pneumonia. Physician« ad­
vise parents to keep it on hand.
PRO TECTION !
--- OLDS XT HOUSB H NORTHWEST'----- -
Laraa end com pi ei* Mock of Fire A operate*. Ham
end Department Hap*«I**. Oer go . 4« **• le am m
m arly ovary Fira Dapertmeei.
HEAVY COt*. BR, BRAZED JOINT», RELI­
ABLE FIRE BXTINOUBHBRS
telwocli—
”
" I*»tro
e b O i n a notblM oouid ooralMy b* batter.- _
K a d w d K it ln g u U h .r
M U LL, f
with riveted totale. »1» •
j. o. A m 00..
A
A C . L O K . N r t W . 0r
Low ell. Mana.
fo r
Throat, Lungs
Ayer’s Pills greatly aid the ChefQ
Pectoral in breaking up a cold.
Clerical Jett.
Bhe was wealthy and consequently a
target for much flattery.
“ Ia It a aln,” she asked her spiritual
adviser, “to take pleasure In having
people call me beautiful?”
“O f course It ia, my child," replied
the good old parson. “ It la alw ays
wicked to encourage falsehood." •
ara known by
I A a.
i to alia
D. M FERRY A, CO.,
Décroît, (Meli,
F
ITS after Ar*td»y*u**ofi> r,kltii«'*llrm tK arvo
Rmtorer. Bend tor PreeRS trial bottle and trentine.
Prrm onontly Cared. Ito flu a
r.K llD O
Dr. K. H. Kline, Ltd., Ml Arab at., Phi Inde! pilla, Pa
Bite’ll Looked Ic Op A ll R i f h t
Teacher— Have you looked up foe
meaning of the word “ imbibes,” Fanny?
Fanny— Y oa ma’am.
T*«char— Well, what does it mean?
Fanny— To take in.
Teacher— Y o a N ow give a sentence
taing fo e word.
Fanny— My annt Imbibes board era.—
Woman’s Horn* Companion.
A GUARANTEED CURE FOR PILES
I tcklnc Blind, Bleeding or Protending PI lea.
T ea r druggist wtU refund m oney I f FAXO O IN T -
’ O H T A lls to oars yoa la * la M S aya Ma.
No Flo
A Ray County, Missouri, man bet $2
Chat he could tw ist the tall o f a dan-
colored male and escape unscathed. Ia
reply to a telegram from foe coroner
hls father. In foe East, wired: “ B u y
t h e -------- fool where be lit.”— Denver
NA «2- 1*04
P. N. U.
Poet.
CASTOR IA
The K ind Y o a H ave Alw ays B ough t has borne the signa«
tare o f Chas. H . Fletcher, and has been m ade under hls
personal supervision for oyer 3 0 years. A llo w no one
to deceive you in this. Counterfeits, Im itations and
“ Just-as-good” a re b at Experiments, and endanger the
health o f Children—Experience against Experim ent.
■ W h a t is CASTORIA
Castoria is a harmless substitute fo r Castor O il,
goric, Drops and Soothing Syrups. I t is Pleasant, I t
contains neither Opium , M orphine n or other Narcotie
substance. Its age is its guarantee. I t destroys W orm s
and allays Feverishness. I t cures Diarrhoea and W in d
Colic. It relieves Teething Troubles, cures Constipation
and Flatulency. I t assimilates the Food, regulates the
Stomach and B ow els, giving healthy and natural si
sleep.
The Children’s Panacea—The M other’s Friend.
The Kind You Have Always Bought
Bears the Signature of
In Use For Over 30 Years.
* » T M U M M Y f i T M r r , N S W Y O U R C IT Y .
RUSSELL T oilers
Wu High Grade
B J I!S Machinery
The A. H. Averili Machinery Co.
W rite for Catalogue and Prices
'
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