A PARADOX OF ACTING.
W hy not, indeed?
When the Royal Baking Powder makes
finer and more wholesome food at a less cost,
which every housekeeper familiar with it will
affirm, why not discard altogether the old-
fashioned methods of soda and sour milk, or
home-made mixture of cream of tartar and
soda, or the cheaper and inferior baking pow
ders, and use it exclusively?
EXPERIENCES OP A RESOURCEFUL
MANAGER WITH A PLAY.
L ooking for a S tar W ho W ould Be W Ill-
lug to M ake Love to a M um m y—M ar-
r jln g an A ctrtw i to S ecure H e r Service».
M um m y R eplaced by D um m y.
HE WOULD NOT LEAVE THE COLONY.
A P riso n e r W ho Clim bed a Cocoanut T ree
an d Defied a R eg im en t.
It is the custom in the British army
that whenever a regiment is transferred
from one colony to another prisoners
who may he in the j.iil are handed over
to the outgoing corps and continue tln-ir
sentences at the new station. In one
case one of these jail birds made up his
mind that ho would not leave the colony.
Private Johnson was one of the smart
est men in the curpH, and furthermore
he was an excellent groom and almost
a “cordon bleu.” He had one sad fail-
inp. lie was a thief. His peculations
had, however, been generally small, and
lie had escaped serious punishment. One
ni„'ht u large store in the town was bro
ken into and a considerable amount of
money stolen. It was conclusively
proved that Johnson was the thief, and
ho was sent to jail. When the regiment
was leaving the colony, Johnson, with
some otln r soldier prisoners, was to be
handed over according to custom. Wlien,
however, his cell was visited, it wns
empty, and there was not a si^-n of
Johnson anywhere.
A search was made in every direction
and at last a prisoner pointed to a cocoa-
nut tree which grew in the middle of
the prison yard, and there comfortably
seated among the tuft of leaves was
Johnson. The warden at first tried to
get the man down by quiet persuasion,
then he threatened, then stormed and
swore. Johnson laughed contentedly at
every mood, but did not move. The fact
was reported to the colonial secretary,
who recommended that the fire engine
be called out and the man washed down.
The chief of the tiro department hardly
thought it was consonant with his dig
nity to waslj a prisoner out of a cocoa-
nut tree and reported that there was not
pressure of water enough to get a stream
to the top of the tree. This was proba
bly true, for the tree was a tall one.
The caso was again referred to tho co
lonial secretary, who took it before the
governor. His excellency was having
luncheon with some of the departing
officers and their friends and was having
a good time. Ho was vexed that at such
a time he should be troubled with official
work, ns hastily glancing over the docu
ment he added the following instruc
tions: “Cut tho fellow dow». I mean
the tree.”
This could only be done by the engi
neering department, so orderlies were
gent out to find the chief engineer.
While all this was going on, time was
slipping away. Almost all the troops
were ou board the troopship, and as thes5
vessels wait for no one tho escort which
had t«‘on sent to bring Johnson down to
the ship had to hurry off, not to bo late
itself. Johnson bellowed a farewell, and
despite the strong language of the ward
en still laughed and did not move. Be
fore the engineer department had come
to a conclusion as to how to cut down
the tree and lower it gradually, the
troopship had up anchor and was steam
ing out of tho harbor.
Then Johnson climbed down the tree
and finished his sentence on the island,
to which lie had taken u fancy. His con
viction had carried with it his "discharge
with ignominy." Ho settled in the island
and was soon in easy circumstances. Ho
had undoubtedly hidden his stolen prop
erty, and after his release dug it up and
started in business. When Johnson was
last seen, he was flourishing and lmd a
large cocoa n at grove around his cottage.
"T h e paradox of a c tin g ? ” said th e m a n a
ger, th o u g h tfu lly , “ I sh o u ld sa y I ’d seen
so m e th in g of w h a t y o u ’d caLl th e p arad o x
of actin g . Yen, 1 sh o u ld say I had. If i t ’s
come u n d e r m y o b serv atio n once i t ’s com e
u n d e r it a h u n d red tim es, a n d in cu e case
—look here, w hen d id you la s t see ‘A
Dead M ash?’
“ W hy, ‘A Dead M ash’ has been th e
g re a te st success I ev er h an d led , a n d I ’m
only ta k in g it off th e road th is y ear be
cause----- . See here, p erh ap s th e n am e of
M iss D otty Devoe, th e lead in g lad y , has
never been b ro u g h t to y o u r a tte n tio n ? If
yo u ’ve heard of Miss Devoe you have heard
of her a s a c h a rm in g s o u b re tte , vivacious,
p iq u a n t an d o r d in a l, in fact th e m o st ta l
enter! actress now on th e farce-com edy
boards. E xactly.
MY CROWN.
“ A b o u t a year before 'A Dead M ash’ was
"O u r B a b y ."
in reh earsal, th e p lay w as in m y h an d s
S he w as a tin y little Kiri, w ith d irty , “Let no man take my crown!” Oh, can it be
su n ta u n t'd h air, a blue calico d ress and These gracious, royal words were m eant forme? w a itin g for a sta r. T h ere w as nobody 1
b are feet. S he c arrie d in her arm s a baby MycrownI And was I l>orn a crown to wear? knew 1 cared a b o u t g iving it to. You
h a lf as larKe as herself, a n d th e baby w as W here is my kingdom. Lord, oh, tell ine, where? recollect th e tim e. A you n g g irl falls in
love w ith a m u m m y in th e m u seu m and
b o heavy th a t it Nagged d ow n in the mid
Stand forth, O m ortal, and receive thy right!
coaxes h im to life. Now, th e respousibil
d ie, g iv in g th e in fa n t th e ap p earan ce of Hath ho not said It—he, the king of might?
b eing held by the feet a n d nape of the Joiut heir thou art with him. the prince who ity of Hurling th e r ig h t w om an fo r it
w eighed on me.
neck. T h e re w as som e ex c ite m e n t aro u n d
wins.
A STAB DISCOVERED.
th e c o rn e r of the n ex t block on W ash Thy reign th at hath no end e’en hero begins.
“O ne day I learn ed th a t a little g irl,
stre e t, an d th e ch ild ren w ere h u rry in g for
But not alone In Heaven regnant tbou’ll be;
nam e a n d professional an te c e d e n ts u n
w ard like m ad front till directions. The On earth a radiant crown aw aiteth thee.
little g irl tried to ru n , h u t th e baby was T w as made for thine own use, for thine alone; kn o w n to fam e, had c a u g h t th e to w n in
too heavy, an d her b reath gave out. Said Then see that no m an else ulmlt thee dethrone. B oston in a topical a c t in a ra n k com ic
opera.
I w en t on to see her.
H ouse
1, in a s p ir it of badinage:
W hatever talent thou canst claim as thine.
crow ded, com pany g uys, opera in ex p ressi
“ D rop th e baby, sis, a n d go »ee w h a t th e W hat illumined tru th in thy soul doth shine.
ble! B u t th e little g irl! I t w as j u s t th e
tro u b le is .”
This is thy crown, and this thine empire true.
m ost per feci ly irresistib le th in g you ever
She sto pped a n d sta re d a t me.
Just where is thine appointed work to do.
im agined. S he had a topical song, ‘T each
“ 1 say, p u t th e baby dow n on th e side
ft
m
atters
not
how
small
thy
kingdom
be.
iug th e Baby to T a lk ’—th e one b rig h t
w a lk atul r u n .”
The crown thereof belongs to only thee
th in g in th e opera—a n d by a s tro k e of
“ Y er m u st ta k e m e fer a fool, m ister.*’
If thou canst do in (»oil’s name one true thing. g en iu s they gave her a p a rro t a s w ell a s a
“ W h y ?”
It is thy right; with Joy thine offering bring.
“ ’Cos th is is o u r b ab y .”
—Amelia W King in Business W oman’s Jour baby.
“ You u n d e rsta n d th e idea. T h e p arro t
“ W ell, suppose it is. I’ll sta y here and
nal.
chipped in w ith th e th in g s she w as try in g
w a tc h it fo r y o u .”
to teach th e baby, a n d th e effect w as o u t
“ No, y er w o n ’t, m ister
Yer m ig h t carry
“ II K W AH IN IT.**
of sig h t. Of course it d id n ’t ta k e me a m o
It o il.”
“ W h a t if I didl A in ’t you tired carry in g J u d g e M o n ro e Ho Heel f**d *11 F a v o r o f m e n t to see th a t, th o u g h th e p a rro t was
live en o u g h , it w as one of th e d u m b breed,
K e lly K e lly vs. F « n l« w .
It a ro u n d an d m ak in g y o u r back ache?”
an d th a t th e sp e a k in g w as done fro m the
“ N aw , 1 a in ’t Say, m ister, th is is th e
o nly little baby w e’ve got, an d if y e r only
John J. Kelly vs. People’s Bank et al. Plaint Hies. B u t it w as billed as a tra in e d bird ,
know ed bow sh e can crow an d lau g h yer iff began this suit by seizing a lottery ticket, an d th e audience took i t a ll in an d w as in
w o u ld n ’t w a n t me to do no such thing. one-twentieth of a whole ticket, which had won ecstasies.
“ 1 m ade up m y m in d on th e sp o t I had
T h is baby h a in ’t g ot no m u ’cept me, and 116,000 and had been forwarded to the People’s
p a an d m e co u ld n ’t do ’t b o u t her. She Hank for collection, and in which he claimed found my sta r, and before I left tow n Miss
Bets u p in a high ch a ir a t th e ta b le and one-fourth interest as owner. By consent the D otty Devoe had engaged w ith mo fo r th e
cro w s an d kicks w hile me an d pa eats, an d ticket was cashed, and the unclaim ed three- e n s u in g season, an d th e p a ra g ra p h s were
a t n ig h t 1 rock her to sleep like m a used quarters were withdrawn, leaving the contested being se n t round to th e papers. I filled up
to do W hen nut died th e baby d id n ’t oge-quarter, which was also claimed by John m y com pany for ‘A Dead Mash,* fixed
A u g u s t for reh earsals an d a rra n g e d * to
k now no b e tte r, b u t ju s t laughed an d hoi W. Fenlow, under control of the court.
lered, am i 1 cried so I c o u ld n ’t keep her
The parties live in St. Louis, and have been m eet M iss M cPherson — real nam e—and
still. P u t her dow n on th e s id e w a lk l Fool quite unfortunate. In 1891 Fenlow, Kelly, Norle- her a u n t a week o r tw o beforeh an d , so as
k ille r ’ll g it you, m ister, ef you stay aro u n d ni ah y O’Keefe and ('minors formed a quasi club, to g e t th in g s q u ie tly in shape betw een us.
GAINING A POINT.
here lo n g .” —St. L ouis Republic.
and on three or four occasions purchased five
“ My d e a r sir, such w as th e perso n al ch arm
fractions of lottery tickets, said fractions cost
an d in g en u o u sn ess of th e y o u n g lad y th a t
Ill III» lloilMO of Colli III OIIM.
ing $1 each, and each member contributing bis
“ My d e a r s ir ,” observed th e g re a t m an proportion of the price was equally interested it to o k me and th e a u th o r a week to dis
to m e as lie lit a n o th e r cig a re tte , “ you in the winnings. Fenlow generally was charged cover th a t we had ru n in to th e deadest
m u s t u n d e rs ta n d th a t n o th in g is as it used w ith purchasing the tickets, and held them j w all of o u r lives, uud t h a t she c o u ld n ’t act
a t a ll—not a little bitl She w as sim p ly in
t o be here. T im es are changed; so are until the drawing.
com petent.
inanneBK; so is th e shape of people’s hats.
The members usually paid their contributions
“ If a m an could go over N ia g a ra falls
Look a t th a t fellow . M ilk p et, who is pass before the drawings, and Fenlow paid the lot
an d retain consciousness he w ould know
lu g us now —observe th a t m o n stro sity he tery ticket vendor.
how I felt. I ta lk e d to little D otty as
h as on his head, a M exican som brero, fit
In April, 1892, they Invested (Connors had
for th e p am p as or th e m o u n ta in s—who dropped out). All paid except Kelly, who had k in d ly as 1 could a n d trie d to give h e r an
idea
or tw o, b u t it w as no use. S he was
agreed
to
pay
his
dollar
on
the
day
preceding
w ould h av e dream ed of e n te rin g th e house
drawing.
h e a rtb ro k e n —th e re it stopped.
of com m ons w earin g su ch a th in g in Lord the
The tickets had been selected by Norleman.
“ F in ally , w hile I w as te le g ra p h in g all
P a lm e rs to n ’s tim e? Look at th e brim , sir There was no further intereourse between the
I t sp read s over th e te rra c e like an aw n in g members of the club until after the drawing on over th e co u n try to tr y to ra k e u p an o th er
Tuesday, April 1'2, when it was learned that one sta r, 1 pressed her ag a in a b o u t th e topical
M ilk p o t m ig h t hold a tea p arty u n d e r it of
the four tickets had won |1>,(MKI. The ticket-
T h a t show s w h a t is going on.
have been paid for bv Fenlow, and the question song, a n d sh e w him pered o u t th a t she liked
“ W e d o n ’t even dress like gentlem en for the court to decide is whet her Fenlow paid p a rro ts an d had alw ay s ju s t loved babies,
account of Kelly f l ,o r whether it was tor an d sh e d id n ’t like m um m ies, an d t h a t was
an y m ore. A m an m ay do a n y th in g now for
his own account.
ad u y s an d no one will t hin k th e w orse of
The day after the drawing Kelly tendered his all th e re w as to it.
“ I seem ed to g e t hold of an idea here,
him . It used to lie an un d ersto o d th in g dollar, but was told that he was “ too late " and
b u t for th e life of me I c o u ld n ’t, tell w h at
t h a t d iv isio n s should n ot he s p ru n g upou that he was “ not in it."
The court concludes that Fenlow gave Kelly it was.
u s in th e d in n e r hour, o r a t o th e r unseem
to understand that he (Fenlow) would sec that
“ T h ere was, say, te n days before reh ear
ly tim es, an d conHcqiuMitly we could go Kelly's interest in the ticket would be paid for.
H u ttliim E n te rp rise .
It is therefore ordered, adjudged and decretal sals need begin. In th o se te n d a y s—d o n ’t
aw ay co m fo rtab ly an d d in e w ith o u t fear
that there be judgem ent in favor of John J. laugh, for 1 w as se rio u s—I m ade a s good
“Talk about business enterprise,” said
of co m in g back and finding th e sh ip sc u t Kelly and against John W. Fenlow, decreeing
tied . B u t now we are obliged to be here Kelly It) have been the owner of an undivided love to th a t g irl as 1 knew how. T here Frank L. Perley, a circus man. "Away
all th ro u g h a s ittin g —we «hire n ot leave one fourth Interest in the lottery ticket, and w as no reason I sh o u ld n ’t, ex cep t age; and back in 1885 we had a young fellow with
that plaintiff receive and collect f;1,75o, repre
th e place, even for ten m in u tes
senting the one-fourth of the proceeds of the th e re w as good reason 1 should, w hen yon us who was getting $15 ami his board.
“ W ell, we cannot alw ay s be stu c k on the lottery ticket now on deposit. New Orleans looked a t her I will m erely say th a t I ’m The night Jumbo was killed in St.
younger th a n som e o th e r old bachelors, Thomas this boy developed himself. Wo
tre a su ry bench, like so m any enchanted (La.) City Item,
and th a t a t th e end of te n day s sh e w as were all sympathizing with poor old
apes, and if we go in to th e lib ra ry som e
A
W
ord
for
th
e
E
arth
w
o
rm
.
ready to m a rry me.
body is su re to be a fte r us w ith a question,
Jumbo and wondering how we could re
T he e a rth w o rm is a n Animal w hich has
“ ‘N ow ,’ said I, ‘m y d ear, 1 w a n t you to
o r a d e p u ta tio n , o r a re q u e st w hich is u t
te rly irre g u la r, not to say d isg u stin g . So n ot received th a t a tte n tio n from zoologists th in k of th is play j u s t once m ore. If you place him. The youngster was thinking
you see it h a s become necessary to provide w hich it deserves, in sp ite of th e fuel th at can love m e you can love a m u m m y , J of something else. You know tho tail
of an elephant lias at the very tip a
each of us w ith a room. A lot of se rv an ts its h abits an d s tr u c tu r e form ed th e last of g u ess.'
bunch of thick hair very much like a
“ ‘J o h n ,’ she said, ‘you m u s t be crazy .’
a n d clerk s have been tu rn e d o u t of th is th a t m agnificent series of volum es w ith
p a r t of th e house, an d here we are in th eir w hich D arw in en rich ed scient ific lite ra tu re .
“ ‘M y love,' said I, ‘1 m ean it. You are brush. This boy got under the fence and
places. C om e in, and 1 w ill show you A nd it has not only been neglected by n a t to go on tlie sta g e th is aftern o o n fo r re
had pulled every hair out of Jumbo’s
u ralists, b u t has in c u rre d th e b itte r enm ity h earsal, you are to m ake u p y o u r m ind tail. His business at the circus was to
m in e.” —M a cm illan ’s M agazine,
of g ard en ers and farm ers. It is tru e th a t that, th a t m um m y is m e, an d you are to act sell balloons to children. Well, there
D ogs a r e n o t th e o n ly a n im a ls em o th e g a rd en er has som e reason for his dis to it. A nd if you d o n ’t, I vow I w o n ’t were 7t! of those thick hairs, and at tho
tio n a lly affe c te d by m usic. C a ts sorno like when he sees his carefu lly rolled w alks m a rry y o u .’
an d sm ooth law ns rendered u n sig h tly by
“ I t w as an aw fu l risk , b u t I to o k it. She show tho next afternoon he was selling
tim e s sh o w g r e a t fo n d n e ss for p lay in g
th e heaps of e a rth w ith w hich th e worm gave m e one look, tu r n e d on her iieel and them for si apiece as relics of tho great
a n d sin g in g , th o u g h m u sic does n o t a p d ilig e n tly covers them .
w alk ed off. 1 held on to m y co u rag e like giiuit. He sold 75 of thorn and practi
l u a r to a ffe c t th em to th e p o in t o f how l
B u t th e farm er h as no business to com g rim d e a th till rehearsal cam e. S he was cally found 175. Tho other one he kept
M
*
__________________
plain, for n ot only do earth w o rm s form a there.
for himself and still wears it as his mas
SUCCESS IN AN UNFAIR WAY.
large p a rt of th e food of m any birds, w hich
cot."—St. Louis Globe-Democrat.
A man falls on the icy pavement and w ould, perhaps, in th e ir absence direct
“ H er. first lines w e n t off p re tty w ell. I
breaks his leg; he c a rrie s a q u a r t of milk th e ir a tte n tio n m ore closely to h is crops had provided a p ro p erty m u m m y as m uch
Hull» Said H er Verse.
In a tin p ail w ith o u t a cover; ho doe» not and fru it trees, b u t th e y are of positive ad
like m e in th e g e n e ra l o u tfit as w ell as
Little Ruth can read very nicely, and
could be w ith o u t c a llin g a tte n tio n . In her
lose a d r o p o f it.
vantage in loosening th e soil, an d so m ak
ing passages for th e rain to tric k le dow n to first scene w ith it it w as behind a g lass, in her mother is nnxiotis that at an early
ago she shall become familiar with the
a case—an d it w as b ro u g h t o u t a n d u n
th e lowest roots.
More th an a h u n d red years ago G ilbert w rapped, and all th a t. H an k E dw ards, Bible, so that when she was obliged to
W hite devoted one of his le tte rs to th e s u b t h a t ’s th e a u th o r, an d I w ere w atc h in g her leave home to be gone five months she
je c t of e a rth w o rm s, and defended them all of a trem ble. She w as pale a n d had a told Ruth she would bring her home a
red sp»»t in each cheek. S till, sh e w e n t on muff if she would say a Bible verse every
W hen w e least
from t he accusation of uselessness a n d in
ex p e rt t h e m ,
ju rio u sn ess in th e econom y of n a tu re, re all r ig h t u n til th e u n co v erin g —a n d th en , night la-fore she went to bod. Ruth
sir,
sh e m ade a su d d e n d a r t a t th e o bject,
accidents w i l l
m a rk in g fu rth e r, an d so to a c e rtain ex
promised that she would. Mamina came
he la 11 us, a v e n
te n t a n tic ip a tin g D arw in, th a t th ey are dashed it dow n to th e floor, kick ed it like
home at tho end of the five months. Be
ia ilion o f the
often responsible for th e form atio n of new a little fury, an d th en sat dow n on it cry
fore presenting the muff shesaid: “ How
soils.—F K. Heddurd, M. A., in C ham bers' ing a s if her h e a rt w ould break.
o l d a d a g e that
“ 1 th re w up m y hands. 1 w as sh a k in g ab ..t the verses. Ruth?" "1 said one
Journal.
th e un exp ected
w ith ex citem en t so t h a t 1 could h ard ly every night, mamma." “That’s mam
a I w a y s h a p -
FUliea T h.it C arry B u tteries.
speak. I g rab b ed E d w ard s by th e co llar ma's nice girl
You must have learned
p en s. T h e fo l
T
he
“
to
rp
ed
o
”
o
r
“cra
m
p
fish*’
has
two
an
d jam m ed t he sta g e copy of th e play into a good many in five months, dear.”
lo w in g r e c i t e s
co
m
plete
electric
b
atteries
on
e
ith
e
r
side
of
his
hand.
‘H
an
k
!’
1
gasped,
‘ta
k
e
i
t
—ta
k
e
how an active bu sin ess man w as
Why, I always said the very same one.”
Its head, co n stru cted a fte r th e m ost ap it hom e w ith you, p u ll th e w hole th in g to
su d d en ly brought dow n.
The same one all the time! What was
proved scientific prin cip les Kach of them pieces a n d re w rite it up to th is scene.
TH E TR A IN STOPS.
consists of about 470 cells in th e shape of B rin g it back in th e m o rn in g if y ou have that?” “Jesus wept,” said Ruth. It
C incin , O. “ Recently while in the act of
six sided tulies placed side by side. The to w rite y o u r ears off.’ T hen 1 pushed wasn't just wlmt mother expected, but
•lighting from my c ir. I stepped upon a stone,
w alls of these cells are lined w ith nerve h alf a dozen of th e com pany o u t of th e Ruth got the muff.—Boston Globe.
which, turning sudd. n!v undei my foot, threw
tissu e an d each one is tilled w ith a clear, w ay, dropped dow n by D otty ou th e
me to the grnutn I. w it h a s«*\ « r ely <t .lined ankle.
tre m b lin g jelly
P recisely how m any volts m u m m y an d laughed u n til th e little T a r
B illia rd Boom* In House!«.
TH E M ANACER STOPS.
th is duplex g alv an ic a p p a ra tu s is capable t a r tu r n e d ro u n d an d hit m e, sir, shipped
Houses will s. >,>u be all top. Men will
Suffering exceedingly. I was helped into mv
of a d m in iste rin g lias never been d eter
car, and my m m rnhhed me most generously
me so u n d ly in th e face, an d 1 d o n 't blanu* go np stairs to play billiards wlien they
with arnica and kudre I remedies, hut to no
m ined, b u t frequent experience h as show n her.
w ill not go down.
Up stairs there is
th e pow er to be sullloient to knock down
“ A nd now, sir, if you w ill go to see A
greater freedom of conversation. Fath
an d tem p o ra rily paralyze a m an
À PO IN T T O STO P AT.
Dead M ash' th e n e x t tim e it is played here,
Reaching a station where St Jacobi Oil could
N atives in C e n tral A m erica are said to mid ta k e p a rtic u la r notice of th e scene in ers have discovered that if there ts A w ell
be procured, two bottles of it
TWP
m ake a practice of d riv in g w ild horses Into w hich M iss Devoe k ick s th e m u m m y in equipped billiard room near the roof.with
t | « f l * h t , It',.- . p • a ,^VV - - 1
w ater w here c ra m p fish are in o rd er th a t ! co n tem p t, you w ill u n d e rsta n d why i good air. an unrestricted outlook, ade
lion of it resulted at on. e in a
relief from pain, which had”*
th e la tte r m ay s tu n th e frig h ten ed quail I claim to u n d e rsta n d th e parad o x of a ct quate privacy and satisfactory means of
well nigh be. ome unbearable. „
ru p ed s an d m ake th em easy to c a p tu re So 1 la g .”
refreshment, tluir sons, after business
1 was out and about my work
th a t a shock sh a ll I k * ad m in istered , th e oh
in three days."
“ It seem s to m e th a t m ethod of educa hours, are m u c h more apt to come home
je
e
t
m
u
st
be
b
ro
u
g
h
t
in
to
c
o
n
ta
c
t
a
t
tw
o
\V \V PPABOnY,
v s ,-
tio u w as a little u n f a ir to M iss Devoe,” 1 and bring t'. ir friends with them to
Prest. \ Gent Man. c> * M
^
po in ts w ith th e torpedo, th u s com pleting su g g ested soberly.
play until d in n e r than to go to their
th
e
electric
circu
it
T h e m an a g e r looked a t me a m om ent,
K K
— (jïïh ?
d u b s . —8,.:. Fraaci-eo Argonaut
S
cientific
m
en
regard
th
is
as
one
of
th
e
an
d
th
e
n
said,
quizzically:
“
P
e
rh
a
p
s
it
T h e Pain Stops. ' w m r
m ost in te re stin g of n a tu ra l p h en o m en a was, because it re su lte d in her h av in g to
M»i . y I .a lly Vl.He.
T w o o th e r k inds of an im a ls |n>ssess gal
m arry m e C om e u p an d see us som e day.
vanic b atteries—a catfish am i an eel The am i y o u 'll find sh e 's g ot a parro t. S he's
W a ll •
• pn*; -re
tw o la tte r have th e sto rag e cells situ a te d got n baby, to o ,” he added reflectively.— -omxu .utils o n high re n ta ls in popular
in th e ir ta ils
In all th re e cases th e elec New Y ork R ecorder
business th o r • i. ifa: s iu this city
tric ity is m erely tran sfo rm ed nervous en
Tin re is one n...n w e.o o b tain s an annual
e rg y .— Interview in W ash in g to n S tar
How Tennsaon l>erl«lr«l a M atter.
incom e o f s. \ r..l t ou-nnd d ollars out
99
Hen* ts T ennyson*» o w n a c c o u n t to M r
>f one s 1 i 1 .
v hi h is conspicn-
M arvelous Fft-untliljr.
o uslv , -
- d
N* •% Y ork H erald.
T he rep ro d u c tiv e pow ers of m any bac J a in e * K now les, e d ito r o f T h e N in o
te ria is so m arv elo u s as to Is* alm o st l*e to e n th C e n tu ry , of how h e w a s off« n ’t 1 !
yond belief. P rofessor I »aw has expert a n d a c c e p te d th e la u re a te s h ip ’ Tli«
My niece, Emetine Hawley, was, m
ented w ith several different form s w hich | n ig h t before 1 w a s a sk e d to ta k e th e
taken with spitting blood, and she w ere capable of d o u b lin g th e ir m im liet la u iv a tc s liip . w h ic h w a s o ffered to tin j
became very much alarmed, fearing every h our. When, in th e l>est con d itio n a th r o u g h l*rince A lb e r t’s lik in g fo r tin i ush I M
to Ik *
that dreaded disease, Consumption. ! sin g le b acteriu m will give 16,777.200 indi In M e m o riaii!,’ 1 d re a m e d ho c a m e to |
She tried nearly all kinds of medi- | vidtials in th e s h o rt space of tw en ty -fo u r m e a tu l kissed m e on th e ch eck . I said |
In fo rty -eig h t h o u rs th e offspring
cine but nothing did her any good. hours.
in m y d re a m , ‘V ery k in d , b u t v ery t i e r j
from a g erm n ot m easu rin g m ore th a n o n e
s -rr
Finally she took German Sv nip and ' fifteen th o u s a n d th of a n inch w ill have in m an . In th e m o r n in g th e le tte r a b o u t j
• -ew .l ta Itati v ir -
».
a
she told me it did her more good ' creased u n til th e ir b u lk can n o t Is* p u t in a th e la u re a te s h ip w a s b ro u g h t to m e an d
»II'*»» o f Ih * l»lrt»MÌ.
.-A
I
than anything she ever tried. It h a lf p in t m easure, th e to ta l n u m b e r of in laid n p o n m y b id . 1 th o u g h t » U n it it
■topped the blood, gave her strength I d iv id u als th e n exceeding *8l,VtO.OUO,OUO! If th r o u g h th e d a y , b u t c o u ld n o t m a k e n p I
d ed u ctio n s are co rrect (am i sc ien tists m y m in d w h e th e r to ta k e it o r r e fu s e it
and ease, and a good appetite I s these
have proved th at they are, as n e a r as such
i a t th e la s t i w ro te tw o le tte r s , one
*n.
Mr*. J o r d a n .
had it from her own lips. Mrs. figures can possibly l*> from th e very n a tu re a a m
c c e p tin g am i on e d e c lin in g , a n d th ro w
Mary A. Stacey, Trumbull, Conn j of th e ex p erim en t), is it any w onder th at th e m on th e ta b le a n d s e ttle d to d ecid e
Honor to German Syrup.
V bacterial dL eases a re so difficult to control? w Inch 1 w oukl send a f t e r my d in n e r an d
- & L I am us Republic.
Mood’» P i’ia •
Is Jaundice,
I B...OU.U, —.a o» r i c t iu h * » *.l C.>u.tl|—tiou.
N. P. It. O. No. WJ—8. F. N. Ü. No. 67.' I
I bottle of port,"_________ _________
-W ILL F IN D A FULL LINE OF-
TYPE, PRESSES,
Printing Material and Machinery
For sale at lowest jirices and most advantageous terms at
P A LM ER & R EY T Y P E FO U N D R Y ,
IIO IT T ’S O A K O K O V I SCH O O L.
M ill brae, San M ateo c o u n ty , Cal. A first-
class hom e school lor boys. B eau tifu l su r
ro u n d in g s. S u p erio r in s tru c tio n . T he nest
o f rare . Its g ra d u a te s for 1893 are ad m itted
to th e S tate U n iv ersity or S ta n fo rd U niver
sity w ith o u t e x a m in atio n . N u m b er o f p u
p ils lim ited . F a ll term com m ences A u g u st
1. Send for catalo g u e, an d m e n tio n th is
p ap er. I ra (i. H o itt, Pii. D ., M aster, ex-
S ta te S upeii in c i d e n t P u b lic In s tru c tio n .
— ——— ♦ 1 ■ —
Mr. Oldheau (growing rom antic)—Ah, how I
wish I had lived in the knightly days of old!
MI m Youngthing (growing wear)y—D ian't you?
D E C ID E D L Y
C o r n e r Fro n t a n d A ld e r Stree ts,
PORTLAND,
I W ~ Write for prices and terms before buying elsewhere.
Hercules Gas Engine
(G A S O R G A S O L IN E )
M a d s for Power or Pumping Purposes.
The Cheapest Reliable Oaa Kuylua
on the Market.
S IIA K V .
A trembling hand, an uncertain step, fidgeti
ness, indicated by restless shifting from one
place or posture to another, u-ually mental an
noyance at unexpected noises, are among the
indications - f extrem e nervousness. These
seem trilling, but the health of men and women
in this condition is “ decidedly shaky,” liable
to be overthrown disastrously by causes which 2">ct3.,
th( rigorous might defy, To fortify th e ner
vous system general vigor m ust, through the 60 cta., and
medium of reinforced digestion and a renewal f i.00 per Bottled ‘
of an im paired t ower of sleeping at night, be I Oue cen t a dose.
raised to a healthful standard. A guarantee of
T n ra G reat C ough C ure ‘prom ptly cures
this is H ostetler’s Stomach Bitters, which re-
establishes digestion, bile seeretion and the where ail other3 fail. Coughs, Croup. Sore
habit of body on a perm anently regular T hroat, Hoarseness, W hooping Cough and
basis, thus renewing th at body equilibrium , Asthm a. F o r Consumption it nna n o rival;
which is followed by a gain <>i' strength ana has cured thousands, and will CURE You i l
nerve tranquillity. For kidney complaint, tak en in tim e. Sold Dy D ruggists on a g u ar
rheum atism , neuralgia, and as a preventive of antee. F or a Lame Back o r d m a t, use
the first attack or subsequent retu rn of mala- 1 S H IL O H ’S BELLADONNA PLASTER.25C.
rial disorders, this medicine is w ithout a peer.
Thrice daily take a wineglassful.
Wibbles—Was his death a case o‘ accident or
suicide? Wabbles — Deliberate suicide. He
called for spring water in a Kentucky barroom.
E R U P T IO N O F T H E
S K IN
O ut
.CATARRH
REMEDY.
Have you Catarrh ? This rem edy is g u aran
teed to cure you. Price, 50 eta. In jecto r free.
It is an effort in behalf of a retributive justice
th at is urging the attem pt to freeze out the ice
combine in W ashington.
RUPTUM C AND P I I.KB C U B E D .
positively cure rupture, pile« and all rec
ta! diseases without pa:n or detention from busi
ness. ho rare, uo pay. Also ail Private dis-
t"s* s. Vidress for pamphlet Drs. Porterfield A
Losoy, bos Market street,‘San Francisco,
The telephone girl, no m atter how charm ing
she may seem to be, is always quite distant in
her conversa .ion.
E ngine AM)
P ump .
dp
F o r S i m p l i c i t y i t B e a t s t h a T V orld«
I t o ils I ts e lf f ro m a R e s e rv o ir,
N o C a rb u r e to r to g e t o u t o f o r d e r.
No B a tte r ie s o r E le c tric S p a r k .
It runs with a Cheaper Orade of Gasoline than any
other Engine.
CU B ED .
E d V enney, B rockvilie, O n tario , C anada,
sa y s:
“ I have used B randbeth ’ s P iles for th e
p ast fifteen y ears, a n d th in k th e m th e best
c a th a rtic an d an ti-b ilio u s rem ed y know n.
F o r som e five years I suffered w ith an eru p
tio n o f th e sk in th a t gave m e g reat pain
and annoyance. I tried different blood
rem edies, but, a lth o u g h g a in in g s tre n g th ,
th e itc h in g w as unrelieved. I finally con
clu d ed to ta k e a th o ro u g h co u rse o f B ran -
dreth ’ s P illh . I to o k six each n ig h t for
four n ig h ts, th e n five, four, th re e , tw o, les
sen in g each tim e by one, an d th e n for one
m o n th took o n e every n ig h t w ith th e
h a p p y re su lt t h a t now m y sk in is perfectly
clear an d h as been so ever sin c e .”
OR.
SEN I) FOB CATALOOPR TO
° A LM E R & REY, M a n u fa ctu rersi
40S Sansomc Stmt San Francisco. Cal.
PO RTLA N D , OKKGON.
DR. GUNN’S
B ak ing Pon der
IMPROVED
LIVER
PILLS
B u r s t y esnd
LctìvenirtiV, P o w e r
UNEQUMLED.
Q A S H P R IC E S
To Introduco our Powder, we have de
termined to distribute among the consum
ers a number of CASH PHIZES. To
the person or club returning ua th e largest
number o f certificates on or before June
1894, we will give a cash prize of $100, and
to tiie next 1 urgest, numerous other prizes
ranging from f3 tof75 IN CASH.
0JS A h'ALD PHYSIC
O N E PILL FOR A D O S E .
^
! A movement of the bowels each day is necessary for
i health. These pills supply what the system lacks to
| make it regular. They cure Headache, brighten tho
! Eyes and clear the Complexion better than cos-
i metiea. They act milci y, »either gripe nor sicken as
! other pills do. To convince you of their merits ws
will mail samples free, or a full box for 25 cents. oolA
I everywhere, iioa^ulco Med. Co., Philadelphia. £ >
FRAZER AXLE
(GREASE
Pest l;i the World! «
Get the Genuine!
Sold Everywhere!1
T ry G krmea for b reak fast.
Jones’ Cash Store,
THI8 IS THE TIME TO
order your SUMMER
ROLLERS. You want
the best ; th a t’s the only
kind we deal in. Then
send your order for the
BEST ROLLERS and
INKS to PALMER di
REY TYPE
F’DRY
P ortland , O r .
1 3 0 F r o n t S tr e e t, P o r tla n d , O r.
Brooklyn Hotel
208-212 Bush S t., San Francisco.
A L O SO m O C E S S IO S
of diseases s ta rt from a toroid liver and im
This favorite hotel is under the managem ent
pure blood. D r. Pierce’s Golden Medical Dis
covery cures every one of them . I t prevents of UIIARLES MON r O O M E K Y , and i*. a* good if
them , too. Take it, as you ought, vvhen you not the best Family and Business Men’s Hotel
feel tho first sym ptom s (languor, loss of ap in San Francisco.
petite, dullness, depression) anti y ou’ll save
yourself from som ething serious.
In building u p needed flesh an d strength, First-class service and the highest standard of
ami to p u rify an d enrich th e blood, nothing respectability guaranteed. Our rooms cannot be
can equal th e “ Discovery.” I t invigorate« surpassed for neatness an 1 comfort Board and
the liv er and kidneys, prom otes all the bodily room per day, $1.25, $1.50, $1.75 and $2.00; board
functions, and brings back health and vigor. and room per week, $7 to $12; single rooms 50c
F or Dysjiepsia, “ L iver Com plaint,” Bilious to $1. Free coach to and from hotel.
ness, nitd all Scrofulous. Skin, and Scalp Dis
eases, it is the only rem edy th a t’s guaranteed
N O D IR T O R S M O K E .
to benefit or cure, in every case, o r tho money YOUR WIFE CAN RUN IT!
is refunded._______ ________________
Hercules (¿as or U u o l i n e Engine,
Palmer & Roy, S. F., Cal. and Portland, Or.
About C atarrh . No m atter w h at you’ve
tried and found w anting, you can be cured
w ith l)r. Sage’s C atarrh Remedy. The pro
prietors of this medicine agree to cure you,
A. FELDENHEIM-
or they'll pay you |500 iu cash.
ER, Leading Jew
eler of the Pacific
Nature should be
Northwest, keeps a
large stock of all
assisted to tli ro w
SECRET SOCIETY
BADGES on hand.
off Im purities o f the
Best goods at low
b l o o d . N o t h in g
est figures. Badges
CURES
made to order.
Home Comforts! Cuisine Unexcelled!:
M A L A R IA L
P O IS O N
does it so w e ll, so
p r o m p t l y , o r so
safely as S w i f t ’ s
Sp ecific.
L I F E H A D NO C H A R M S .
F o r th ree years I was troubled with m ala
rial poison, w inch caused my ap p etite to fail,
and 1 was g reatly reduced in flesh, and life
lost all its charm s. 1 tried m ercurial and
potash rem edies, h u t to no effect. I could
cet n o relief. I th en decided to try ”
A few bottles of this wonderful
m edicine m ade a com plete and perm anent
cure, and I now enjoy better health than ever.
I
J. A. K ice , O ttaw a, Kan.
O u r lro o k o u U I.sx l itu ,l S k i u D ise a se s
m ailed free.
Swii-r SrECirio Co., A tlan ta, G a
HERCULES
GAS ENGINE.
Ninni) Spoils, Chills
HOOD S
PRINTERS AND PUBLISHERS
There N more catarrh in this section of the I a o S S E f & DEVERS. PORTLAND, Or.
country lian all other diseases put together,
ai cl until the last few years was supposed
be
incurable. For a great many years doctors pro
nounced it a local disease and prescribed local
remedies, and by constantly failing to cure with
local treatm ent pronounced it incurable. Sci
ence lias proven catarrh to be a constitutional
dis ase, and therefore requires constitutional
treatm ent. H all’s Catarrh Care, m anufactured
oy F. J. Cheney tk Co., Toledo, Ohio, is the only
constitutional cure on th • m arket. It is taken
internally in dose- from ten drops to a teaspoon-
F R A N K W O O L SEY .A g e n t, P o r t l a n d . O r.
ful. It act' directly on the blood and mucou
surfaces of the y>tem. They offer one hundred
dollars for any case it fails to cure. Send for
circulars and testim onials. Address
Choice Rice, 5c lb; large Raisins, 5c; fine Tea,
F. J. CHENEY S l CO., Toledo, O.
30c; K eg > y ru p ,fl; Arbtickle Coffee, 25c; Sago,
i z r Sold by druggists; 75 cents.
5c; Tapioca, oc; J1 a-tt) pkgs King’s Buckwheat,
10c; Pried Peaches, l i e ; Figs, 4c; Prunes, 12e;
Apples, evaporated, 11c. SKNI> FOR THE 16-
Use jSuamcllne Piove Polish; no Unit, no m e il. PAUK BUYERS* CITHE FREE, WITH FULL!
QUOTATIONS. Mention this paper. Address
How t o Como to a Stop.
“German
Syrup
T he V icto ria Crons.
T he q u estio n It..« been asked« How w au y
officers a re e n title d to w ear th e V ictoria
cross? l a m ab le to an sw er th e questio n
T he m ere sta te m e n t of n u m b er reveals at
once th e ex clu siv e ch a ra c te r of th is rew ard
for valor. No k s s , how ever, th a n th irty
nine g en eral officers are e n title d to w ear it
—an in d icatio n of the fact th a t prom otion
to exalte« 1 m ilita ry ra n k iu E n g la n d has m
a g re a t m any cases been th e rew ard of he
roic m erit. T h irty colonels an d lieu ten an t
colonels are en title d to w ear th e decora
tio u ; tw en ty -tw o m ajors, eleven cap tain s
e ig h t lie u te n a n ts a n d five q u a rte .m a ste r»
possess th e sam e privilege.
F ifty -n in e of th e m edals, how ever, are
held by noncom m is-ioued officers and pri
vates, th irty -fo u r being in possession of
priv ates, five of lance co rp o rals, th ree of
corporals, seven of serg ean ts, six of color
serg ean ts, tw o of q u a r te rm a s te r serg ean ts
an d tw o se rg e a n t m ajors. One clergym an
possesses th e m edal, th e Rev. J. W . A dam s,
who w as fo rm erly atta c h e d to th e B engal
ecclesiastical es ta b lis h m e n t.—-M anchester
E x a m in e r._______ __________
l i n n W ith G a« o r G a s o llu r .
T our Wife can run it. Requires uo licensed
•aiameer. Makes no smell or airt. No Batten« '
t»r Electric bpnrk.
I ' l i n i H & H I V,
8 ax F k a w sco , C a l
P ortland . O r
iron j : ds ,
f
Send for Catalogue.
l Q n n D n n y 21
. ili IJuHiUJuii
SOCIETY
BARRES.
HAVE
YOU
GOT
PILES
iTCItTNO rTT.SS known b - metstnf«
lin e p e r s p ir a tio n ,c a u s e in te n s e itc h in g
w h e n w a r m . T h i s fo r m a n d B L IN D ,
B A L E D !N il o r P n O T H U tlN O P I L L J
T i t L P AT OifCK TO
$ 6 .0 0 .
Fina Beddingi
Hair M attresses,
Floss M ettressei
W ire M attresses
and Pillow s.
new M ontgomery
San Francisco
YOUNC MEN!
T h e Specific A No. I.
Cores, without fail, &J1 cases of t t o n o r e
!»«¥•:» und « l e e t, no matter of how long
standing. Prevents stricture, it being an hi*
ternal remedy. Cures wnen every thing ?lse
has failed Sold by all Druggists.
M anufacturers; u 1 The A.~
8c h oe n h ef * M ed V*in e
Co., San Jose, CaL
P r l f f . fti.OO.
MRS. WINSLOW'S
-
FOE
C H ILD R EN
S o o t h 1 n
S yrup
TE E TH IN C
g
For .. I f hr >11 i rnn l-u. VJ 1 t in . a U.ttU.
DTI. B0-SAN-KG S PILE R CM EOT,
wV li a>* $ direct iv o * i parrs arreted,
absorbs tumors, alia vs itetn ng, effect in g
s pnrrnan-nt cure. I*ri<v»fKV\ Drucgl*tj
Or
Dr. Bosanko, Flr.ladel»'t.i*. Pa
I T H E B EST
1 HARNESS
Û ' St " Co.,
’IS R K V K ""1
’
S7S.OO B. If F. till.D
J
, V
ohnson
ich m o n d
a
KVER M ANUFACTURED ON TH E COAST
is wjkl by DOLE-PF.ARSOX H ARNESS CO.,
at prkvs that will iL-tomidi vor. Only the best
Oak-Tanned I-eather need, and all work guar
anteed. S en d for fine Illustrated Catalogue f r e e .
IS " i ilion A venu e (E ast w ide). P o r tla n d , Or.
t
5
‘ HE T H A T W O R K S E AS I L Y , W O R K S
SUCCESSFULLY.” CLEAN HOUSE WITH
SAPO LIO
R H E U M A T I S M C U R E D BY T H E USE OF
Moore’s Revealed Remedy.
R H M M A T :-M *u,i : u t T our.?e*t «>^ -o re d e n tire ly of ISFLA M M A TO RV K H E f .
CURES
MATliJi when the be.: Jo cto rl cou.d »et did Mm uo gon .1 Y - it * t- e:»:tt«d*
MRd N. V. STIMLa
I
• old m
T ora
drcbout .