T O A S T M A S T E R IIA R K E R .
HE HAS HEARD MORE A FTER D'NNER
SPEECHES TH A N ANY O TH E R MAN.
H is R e m in isc e n c e s o f l>i*tli>ttui»hcd D iners.
C h a rle s D irk e u s W as a H e ad y S p e a k e r.
D ro u g h t O u t th e I’rin c e itl W a le s —D in
trig 5,0 0 0 D octors.
T -A co-vmc)tT
T h e ass th o u g h t him self as fine look
in g as his n eighbor, the horse, u n til he,
one day, saw him self In the looking-
glass, w hen he said “ W h at an ass am 1 1”
A re th e re n o t scores of people w ho
can n o t see them selves as o th e rs see
th e m ?
T h ey have bad blood, pim
ples, blotches, eru p tio n s, a n d o th e r kin
d re d disfigurem ents. A ll these a n n o y
in g th in g s could be e n tire ly eradicated,
a n d th e sk in resto red to “ lily w h ite
ness,” if th a t w orld-fam ed rem edy, Dr.
P ie rce ’s G olden M edical D iscovery,
w ere given a fa ir trial.
I t cures all hum ors, from th e o rd i
n a ry bloteh, pim ple o r e ru p tio n to the
w o rst scrofula, o r th e m ost in v eterate
bloo d -tain ts, no m a tte r w h a t th e ir n a
tu re , o r w h e th e r th ey be in h erited or
acquired. T h e “ G olden Medical Dis
c o v e ry ” is th e o n ly blood - p urifier
guaranteed to do j u s t w h a t it is rec
om m ended to, o r m oney refunded.
W o r l d ’ s D i s p e n s a r y M e d i c a l A s
P ro p rie to rs, N o. 0C3 M ain
S treet, Buffalo, N . Y.
s o c ia t io n ,
M any m en say th e ir piayers by proxy, b u t very
few do th e ir c u rsin g that.w ay.
F ll O T K C T D M K IIK i L T H .
CoM an d m o istu re com bined have a torpor!z-
ing effect upon th e bodily organs, aud th e d i
gestive am i secretiv e processes are apt to be
m ore ta rd ily perform ed in w in te r th a n In the
fall. T h e sam e is tru e also of th e excretory
fu n ctio n s. 1 he bowels are often sluggish, ami
th e p ores of th e sk in throw off h u t little waste
m a tte r ut th is season The system , therefore,
re q u ire s o p e n in g up a little, anil also purifying
au d re g u la tin g , an d the safest, surest and most
th o ro u g h to n ic and alte ra tiv e th a t can he used
for the.-ie purposes is H ostetter’sS tom ach Hitters.
P ersons who wisn to escape the rh eu m atic
tw inges, th e d v sp cp tif agonic», th e pain fu l d is
tu rb an ces ol th e howqls, the bilious attacks, and
th e n ervous v isitations, so com m on at this tim e
of th e year, w ill do well to re in fo rce th e ir sys
terns w ith th is renow ned veg» ta b le stom achic
and in v lg o ran t. it im proves th e a p p etite,
stren g th en * th e sto m ach, cheers th e spirits, ami
ren o v ates th e w hole physique.
To be great y our o p p o rtu n ity m ust borne w hen
th e w orld is looking on.
I t KM fcTl k k k T
A l l c o c k ’ s a r e th e o n ly g e n u in e P o r o u s
P l a h t k k h . T h e y a c t q u ic k ly a u d w ith
c e r t a i n t y , a n d c a n b e worn f o r w e e k s w ith
o u t c a u s i n g p u iu o r in c o n v e n ie n c e . T h e y
are in v a lu a b le in c a s e s o f S p in a l W ea k -
nesH t K id n e y a n d P u lm o u a r v 1 dflicu ltieH ,
M a la r i a , A g io L u k e , ¿»truinn, K h u u m a t ikid
a n d a ll Local P a m s .
B e w a r e o f u n iia tio n n , a n d d o n o t b e d e
c e iv e d by m is r e p r e s e n t .lio n .
A s k for
A l l c o c k s , a n d i« t n o m » .c ita tio n o r e x
p l a n a t i o n in d u c e y o u lo a c c e p t a s u b s t i
tu te .
r
_____
N o th in # i lin t slu m s th e lig h t .cun bo tru sted in
tho dark.
I f D o b b in s ’ E l e c u i c S »ap in w h a t so
m any JiH ii’st. ib a i i t is, >< u c a n n o t a f f o r d
to g o * w 1 th o u t i t. Y o u r g r» < e r lia s It, o r
c a n g o t ib. a n «1. y o u < ;w d^v-ide f o r y o n n t d j
very s o o p . Do t lot; ^n<nlp;r AJom lay pass
w itd o u t try in g it.
Thorn 1» urn* ihlio# G hi may L o m i M oi « spide!
—th e re mi n » (lies on it.
*
K t i l ’ r i i ' t ; a S i * rir.icH u i j k e d .
We pdt4ttv%)y(BTif phi re dud nil rectal din
eases w tlhoyf pain <« qctautvMi from bUHincv
No cure,
pay ; a n d ito pay u n til cured. Ad
dress foij pam pii tot Drs. 1'^rtor field Jk Laacy HJe
M arketk*treci, bail )• rai'Chjco.. •.
If you w an t to sia k m oney, get into th e swim.
T he u ccid erm i! rro ti-t.^an K ihiic I hco , is uni
venutily p ronounced by (h e punite the m odel
h o tel id (no Ihwdiir t.ounl E verything L perle«*
tio u to th e m inutent d tail, and vue I n m e uncle
to feti! e n ti rely a t lioin . J. A. Hooper, Mmiager.
WHERE-
for p a i n do n o t
consist in its being
good for relief as
o th e r remedies, but
In th e fact, th a t it Is bettor, in being more
prompt an d sure, and therefore th e best for
th e specific purpose It is n o tu n idle catch-
lin e th a t strikes th e eye thus:
\
T j *
X : V 1 IV I li *
hs
S T - JA C O B S O IL
THE GREAT REMEDY FOR PAIN,
IS THE BEST.
ft Is the best cure for nil aches and pains,
and it holds
THE TRUE PROOF.
T o th is specific fact A r c h b is h o p s , l l l s h -
o p a , C le r g y m e n , 1 a w y e r s , D o c to r s ,O o r -
• r n o r s , G e n e r a ls , S e n a to r s , M e m b e rs o f
C o n g r e s s a n d l e g is l a tu r e s , V . S .C o n su ls ,
Army « m l N a v y O ffice rs M a y o rs a m i
o ffic ia l« , testify and unite iu saying: “ We
suffered pain;
OTHER
R E M E D IE S F A IL E D ,
and Pt. Jacobs Oil cured promptly and per
manently " For tho same reason
THE POOR MAN
finds whnt ho seeks and needs, la not deceived
and will have it at any prlea.
“August
Flower
H ow d o e s h e fe e l ?—H e feels
blue, a deep, dark, unfading, dyed-
in-the-wool, eternal blue, and he
m akes everybody feel the same way
—A u g u s t F lo w e r t h e R e m e d y .
H ow d o e s h e f e o l? —H e feels a
headache, generally dull and eon
stant, hut sometimes excruciating—
A u g u s t F lo w o f t h e R e m e d y .
H ow d o e s h e f e e l ? —He feels a
violent hiccoughing or jum ping of
the stomach a fl* f.a meal, raising
bitter-tasting m atter or w hat he has
eaten or d ru n k —A u g u s t F lo w e r
t h e R e m e d y : " ’, '
H ow d o e s h e fe e l ?—H e feels
the gradual de'mwhf vital power ;
he feels mi v iab le., melancholy,
hopeless, and longs for death and
peace— A u g u s t F lo w e r t h e R e m
edy.
ALL THE CROWNED HEADS.
“ W ell, Mr. D a rk e r, you have c ertain ly
heard m ore a fte r d in n e r speeches th an
any m an living. W ill you offer som e
criticism s?”
“ W ell, I suppose C harles D ickens was
a s ready a sp eak er as 1 e v er heard. Tho
w ords flowed o u t like a stre am , b u t he
was not w liat 1 call a good a fte r d in n er
speaker, because lie was so in te restin g
th a t you w ished he w ould go o n forever
Now, th a t d o n 't do for tne, you know,
for I have to sta n d by w ith th e w a tc h .”
“ T he 'sto p ' w a tch , eh?"
“Yes; I'v e stopped Mr. G ladstone lie-
fore to d ay ." T his in a c onfidential w his
per.
“ You d o n ’t say so.”
“A fact. W hen ho is too long I h av e
spoken in to It is e ar, 'T-i-m e, sirl t-i-m -e,'
a n d th e n he slack s up. W ith o rd in ary
m en I say it to th e ‘c h a ir,’ n o t to let the
room h e a r m e, you know. 1 n e v er stop
a in an a t a c h a rity dinner. It doesn't
“ la th e P rin c e u f W ales a good sp e a k
er?”
“ A glorious fellow . If I h a d o nly a
sovereign in th e w orld a n d he w anted
it, he Hhotild h a v e it. W h y , 1 b rought
him out in 'OH, a n d stood behind him
m uny ii tim e a n d oft. Does ho speak
from notes? N ot in sp e a k in g o f him self,
never. H e h a s a slip of pap er to show
the o rd e r of th e toasts, th a t’s nil.
W h at’s his fa v o rite diwli? W ell, ho likes
d a in ties en caisse, en papillot, lark s, lob
sters, oysters. H e is very fond of those.”
“ W ell, now, w ho aro tho m ost fam ous
people you have attended?” Mr. Ila rk e r
looked h u rt a n d his fingers fu m b led ir r i
tably w ith his w hite tie a s he proceeded:
“ W hy, nearly all th e c ro w n ed heads
in Europe. Tho queen, to begin with.
T hen I b ro u g h t o u t th e P rin c e of W ales
in 1863, and all his b ro th ers a n d his sons,
tho em peror o f A ustria, th e la te czar
and th e p re sen t c zar, tho late E m peror
F rederick, th e E m p e ro r N apoleon—w hy,
1 rem em ber sw earin g in th e la te em p ero r
of th e F ren ch as a special ju ry m a n at
the Old Hailey w hen ho w as nobody.
Did ho serve? J u s t liko a n y b o d y else.
Ho had to servo by tho law o f th o land
COACHING T1IK PRINCESS.
“T hen 1 c la im to bo tho person w ho
first induced th e P rin cess o f W ales to
m ake a sj>eoch in public. 1 w as sta n d
ing liehind h e r, a good m any y e ars ago;
it was a t a c h a rity d in n e r o r luncheon,
and h e r speech w as going to be re ad by
her secretary. I ventured to say: ‘If
y our royal h ig h n ess w ould only say a
word yo u rself it w ould m ak e all the
difference,’ a n d sho did. Tho Baroness
B urdett-C outts, too, 1 induced to speak
w hen she opened C olum bia m a rk e t.”
“ W ell, you heard ai>out y o u r successor
who c o u ld n 't pronounce M assachusetts?
W hat is th e m ost d itlicult n am e you
ev er had to tackle?”
“T he M adagascar e nvoy’s. T hey w ere
cautions
K ian d riaiid rian iv o ,' ns near
as 1 can reinem lier it,” said Mr. lia r
ker.
Pain a n d rain a n d d ry again,'
as P u n ch called it The biggest num bei
1 th in k 1 ev er did w as 5,000 foreign doc
tors w ho dined a t th e G uildhall. and
they said i d id n 't m ako one m ista k e .”
“ W h at p re p ara tio n h a d you fo r your
onerous duties?”
“ In 1844 I shipped w ith S ir Jo h n Ross
for tho A n ta rc tic expedition. W e win
tered tw ice in 70 dogs, so u th , then we
w ent to C hina, A u stra lia , New Z ealand.
T asm ania, g e ttin g re m o u n ts fo r th e regi
m enta en g ag ed in the In d ian m utiny. 1
had joined tho c o m m issa riat then. 1
cam e hom e in th e fifties, a n d served
through »he C rim ean w a r.”
“ Any wounds?”
“ A bullet in m y leg, a g u n carriage
crushed m y ribs, and a slice o f m y chin
c u t off w ith a satier. P re tty tough, eh.
1 have tw en ty -six m edals a n d orders, and
my collection of a u to g ra p h s is n o t to be
beaten, 1 th in k , for I h ave 000 cabinet
p o rtraits of all th e fam ous m en a n d w o
m en for th irty y e a rs past, w ith auuv
g rap h s a tta c h e d .”
“ By th e w ay, w hat a re y o u r foes?”
“ T w o g u in eas for a c ity d in n e r a n d ton
guineas if I tra v e l.”
“ A nd y o u r uniform ?”
“ W ell, ev en in g dress ns ofU'ii os not
now. In th e good old d a y s 1 w ore n
beautiful v elvet dress, w ith knee breeches
and silver d ecorations, w h ich cost ¿''<100
But th e city c a n ’t »q>cnd m oney like they
used to do. T hey a re w atch ed by the
n e w s p a p e r s . P a l l Mall G azette.
a
G. G. GKTKX, Sole Manufacturer,
Woodbury, New Jersey, U. S. A.
FERTILIZERS.
G re a t Im p ro v e m e n t« in T h e m D u rin g th a
P a s t T h i r ty Y ears.
A m ong th e o th e r title s to distinction
w hich th e N ineteenth c e n tu ry is h e re a f
te r to enjoy, one will be found in th e fa c t
th a t in th a t ago a g ric u ltu re first begun
to he pursued in a system atic m an n er
w ith th e uid of scientific research. Ma
n u rin g w ith th e p ro d u c ts of the b a rn
y a rd is a very a n cien t a rt, but th e reso rt
to th e m ine for fertilizers is substantially
a n invention of o u r ow n tim es. C hem
ists first told tlte fa rm e r th e cause of the
freq u e n t speedy e x h au stio n in th e g ra in
p ro d u cin g pow ers of th e soil; it lias
fallen to th e geologist to show w hence
m ay be obtained th e phosphatic elem ent
w h ic h is th e m ost q u ick ly exhausted of
all th e elem ents of p la n t food in process
o f cropping.
A lthough artificial fertilizers a re p ra c
tically th e invention of the last th irty
years, th e in d u strie s connected w ith
th e ir m a n u fa c tu re now d em and a cap ital
of aliout $100,000,000, w ith an a n n u a l
p ro d u c t of aliout th a t a m o u n t, and the
volum e of th e in d u strie s is increasing
m ore rapidly, perhaps, th a n any o th er
a r t w hich p e rta in s to m ining. T he use
of a rtitie ia l fertilizers grew o u t of the
tra d e in guano. These heaps of bird
d u n g w ere tirst m ade use of by th e P e ru
vians. The acc o u n t of U arcilasco d o la
V ega, published in 1604, relates th a t tiie
P e ru v ia n s in th e T w e lfth c en tu ry used
g u an o bods a s a source of fertilizers. Of
such im p ortance did th ey esteem the
m ate ria l of these beds th a t the penalty
of death was im posed by th e early Incas
upon a n y one found k illing the birds
w hich m ade these precious deposits.
For m any y e ars th e g u a n o beds of the
w estern coast of S o u th A m erica and
o th er sim ilar de[>osits w ithin the tro p i
cal region supplied th e dem ands of our
g a rd en s. As th e supply of these g u a n o s
npproaehed ex h au stio n and the price in
creased, the skill of c h em ists a n d geolo
g ists show ed th e m a n u fa c tu re rs w here
to find and how to tr e a t deposits of
m in eral phosphates in such a m an n er
th a t th ey m ig h t su b sta n tia lly serve to 10 -
place th e m an u re s of an im a l origin. In
b u lletin No. 46, of th e U nited S tates
geological survey, Ur. It. A. F. P enrose,
J r ., now a ssista n t sta te geologist of
T exas, has given a n im p o rta n t trea tise
on p h o sp h ate deposits, a n d a lth o u g h his
re p o rt m ainly concerns th e phosphates of
N orth A m erica, it g iv es a synoptic ac
co u n t o f th e know n beds of th is n a tu re
in all p a rts of th e w orld. The rep o rt
m ak e s it plain th a t o nly a sm all p a r t of
th e deposits o f th is n a tu re a re y e t know n
to us.
T he process of discovery of th ese val
uahle resources is now , a n d for a long
tim o w ill lie, slow , a n d th is for th e re a
son th a t th e m a te ria l occurs in form s
w hich are u n fa m ilia r to th e public or
even to the o rd in arily tra in e d prospector
w ho seeks for m in eral resources. In
m ost cases tho m ate ria l a p p ears e ith e r
in tho form o f g reenish c ry stals o r in the
shape o f n odular m asses looking m uch
like claystones.
In n e ith e r of these
shapes is it li kely to a ttr a c t general a t
tention. hi fa c t the g re a t de|»isits at
C harleston, S. C., had been in view f o r a
c e n tu ry o r m ore. C oncretions of cerne
phosphate w ere d u g u p in tho d itc h e s of
th e rice fields a n d condem ned a s w o rth
less u n til a fte r th e w a r, w hen a n ativ e
chem ist, once a m an o f fo rtu n e, but
bro u g h t to need by th e havoc w ro u g h t
upon th a t c o u n try d u rin g th e rebellion,
g roping about to lim l som e m eans of
m ending his resources, analyzed th e re
jected stones. As th e result o f his in
quiry they becam e th e very fou n d atio n
of th e com m ercial pro sp erity in his state.
—N. S. Hinder in B oston H erald.
C u rio sitie s of N a tu ra l (¡as.
One w riter asks w h e th e r it is safe to
boro tho e a rth too m uch. lie assum es
tho cart It to ho a hollow sphere iilled
w ith a gaseous su b sta n c e called by us
n a tu ra l gas, and lie th in k s th a t tap p in g
these reservoirs w ill cause disa stro u s e x
plosions, re su ltin g from th e lighted gas
com ing in c o n ta ct w ith th a t w hich is
escaping. E arth q u ak es, ho says, are
probably caused by v acuum s c rea te d by
the outflow ing gas. H e com pares the
e arth to a balloon floated and kept dis
tended by tho gas in th e interio r, w hich
if ex h au sted , will cau se th e c ru s t to col
lapse, affect th e m otion of the e a rth in
its orb it, cause it to lose its place am ong
tho heavenly bodies, a n d falls in pieces
A nother w riter th in k s th a t U>ring
should be prohibited by strin g en t law s
He, too, th in k s th ere is a possibility of
an explosion, l hough from a n o th e r cause
Should such a d isa ster occur, “ th e coun
try along tho gas belt from Toledo
th ro u g h Ohio, In d ia n a a n d K entucky
will he ripped u p to th e depth of twelve
o r fifteen h u n d re d feet, and flopped ovei
like a pancake, leaving a chasm th ro u g h
w hich th e w a ters o f l.a k e E rie w ill com«
how ling dow n, tilling tho O hio a n d Mis
sissippi valleys, a n d blo ttin g th em out
fo rev er.”
Still a n o th e r th e o rist has investigated
th e gas w ells w ith telephones a n d deli
c ate th erm o m eters a n d he announce*
sta rtlin g discoveries
Ho distinguished
sounds like th e Innling of rooks, a n d es
tim a te d th a t a m ile a n d a half o r so lie-
Death Findlay the te m p e ra tu re of the
e a rth is 8.500 dogs. This sc ien tist say>
an im m ense cavity e x ists u n d e r Findlay
and th a t here th e g;is is stored; th a t a
m ile below th e bottom o f th e c av ity is a
m ass of ro arin g , see th in g flame, w hich
is g ra d u ally e atin g in to tho rocky floor
of th e cav ern a n d th in n in g it. E vent
ually tho flam es w ill reach tho gas, a
terrific explosion w ill ensue, and Findlay
a n d its neighltorhood will In» blow n sk\
w ard in an in stan t. Such aro som e of
th e theories g ravely pro|*m nded in re
spect to th is new fu e l.—pro fesso r Joseph
F . Ja m e s in P o p u la r Science M onthly.
T h e r e la m gr# C atarrh id th is auction r,f th e
c o u n try th a n ail o th e r d i k t a t s p u t t o o th e r aud
u n til th e laei few y. ars was »upposed to be iu-
( arable. For a great m an y years doctors pro
n o u n c ed it a local disease, an d prescril*e .1 l< . a.
AN INSTITUTION T H A T IS POPU
rem edies, aud by c o n sta n tly fa ilin g to cute with
local tre a tm e n t, p ronounced it incurable.
LAR W IT H TH E LADIES.
Science has proven c a to rm to be I Q*
S a c r a m e n t o , C a l.. A p r i 11, is u i.
disease, and th erefo re req u ires c o n stitu ti'-u al
O r . J o r d a n , P r a ttle , l i 'u » h .—M y D e a r tre a tm e n t. H a ll’s C atarrh t'u re , m an u factu re 1
fYnmeti Who B a th e to InrreaA. Their F r i e n d : I m u s t t e 'l y o u a lio u t M m . H o st, by F J. C heney d. Co., Toledo, o ., U th e only
c o n stitu tio n a l cure on th e m arket. It io taken
W e ig h t, amt o t h e r , f t h o Oo th e S ain e t h e l a J y w ith t h e te r r i b l e k id n e y tr o u b le . in te rn a lly in doses from ten drops to a teaspoon
to M ak e T h e io .e lv e . T h in n e r— I o n ite .' S h e w a s h e r e a b o u t tw o m o n th s a g o , a n d ful. It acts directly upon th e blood am i m ucous
surface* of th e system . They offer *100 for anv
h a d n o t b e e n f r e e fr o m e x c r u c i a t i n g p a in < aae ir fails to cure. Send for circ u la rs a u d tea
H ay a t a lit. L o u t. H aiti llo u a a .
fo r m o n th s . S h e to o k o n e b o ttle o f X , a n d tim o u ia ls. Address
F. J. CHENEY A CO .T o led o , 0.
W hile 8 t. Louis cannot boast of any h a s b e e n fr e e fr o n t p a in e v e r s in c e ; a n d
-old by D ruggists, 76c.
T urkish both houses m arked by P arisian
s h e w r . t e s t h a t w h e n o n e l i t t l e b o ttle of
The th o ru stays on th e rosebush all th e year
or even L ev an tin e luxury a n d elegance
m e d ic in e w ill d o «o m u c h g o o d s h e t h i n k s ro u n d .
as to fittin g s a n d conveniences, she can
th e w h o le p r e s c r ip tio n w ill c u r e h e r .
claim to h a v e a large continge n t of fresh
llr. W allace Ely has rem oved h is office, to 21
W e n o lo n g e r f e a r c o ld s in a n y fo rm in Powell street, .Sail Francisco, e'al , w here h e cgti -
looking, handsom e women w ho give full
o u r fa m ily . M r. P u r v i s h a d la g , ip p e u t in tie . to give special a tte n tio n to Kldne;. a, B ll I
cred it to th e beautifying influence of
der, P rostate (.lan d an d all diseases arising
re g u la r T u rk ish baths All the public y e a r a g o , a u d h e is a w f u lly a f r a i d o f it. I therefrom . D iabetes au d B rlxht’s Disease treated
a * orditnr to the latest ap proved m ethod. -Mo>t
T urkish b a th s have "L adies' D ays,” and a s k e d h im a fe w d a y s a / o if, in c a s e la eases can be treated successfully by correspond
th e re g iste r o f th e leading e stab lish m en t g r ip p e a t t a c k e d h im s g a n , h e w o u ld b e so e - ce. C onsultatio n s d a lly from lu a . m . to I r
m . W allace E l y , M D., 215 Powell e»re t. four
yields on inspection a long list of nam es b a d ly f r i g h t e n e d t h a t h e w o u ld s e n d f o r a doors from L eary street, San F rancisco, c al.
of ladies pro m in en t in society, in tho d o c to r . H e a n s w e r e d ; “ N o. W h a t t h e
T b y O e r b z a for bre-aXfa.'
schools, in th e churches—in all th e sets J o r d a n m e d ic in e w o n ’t c u r e n o t h i n g o n
and circles of th e body social of o u r city. e a r t h w ill.”
Use
E uam eliue Stove Polish ; n o d u .t: no smell.
1 f o u n d y o u r n te d ic n e s in S a c r a m e n to
On " l a d i e s ' D ays” this bath house can
hardly accom m odate th e crow ds of t h i s w in te r , a n d in tr o d u c e d t h e m in to o n e
m aids, m atro n s, children and school fa m ily w h e r e t h e c h i l d r e n h a d th e whoop
i n g c o u g h ; a n d t h e m e d ic in e s a c t e d lik e a
girls th a t a re its regular custom ers.
c h i r m . T h e w h o le f a m ily —a ll o f w h o m
HAVE THEIR REGULAR DAYS.
The visitor as well us the a tte n d a n ts a t w e re s ic k w ith c o ld s in s o m e f o r m —to o k
the liath house soon learn to look for c e r th e m e d ic in e s , a n d w e re d e lig h te d w ith
tain classes on the sam e d a y s of each suc th e m . V e ry r e s p e c tf u l ly ,
M r s J . L . P u r v is .
cessive w eek. Those w ho com e by ord er
t o d l h e P r a c t i c e o f 1 h u t f t h l c h 1. U u o d
a r e t h e T w o V lo .l I m p o r t a n t O b j e c t ,
o f I lie .
of th eir physicians, or for som e special
physical a ilm en t, are g en erally prom ptly
on hand T uesday; society wom en w ho
com e to recuperate th e ir expended
stre n g th a n d for beauty baths, favor
T hursday as th e off day o f th e ir w eek,
w hen th e gayeties pause fo r b reath and
one is less likely to “ m iss som ething" on
th a t day. S a tu rd ay is th e tea ch e rs' day.
w hen they m ay stop to shod th e dead
skin of th e ir spent forces a n d relax the
ta u t m uscles of discipline on th e slab
w here th e spray soothingly falls on th e
ju st a n d th e u n ju s t alike, for m ost often,
too, som e of th e ir re c a lc itra n t pupils
come in gay , noisy little shoals and m ak e
th e co rrid o rs ring w ith th e ir la u g h te r and
little scream s of m errim ent.
The fa ith of m any w om en in tlte v ir
tues of the T urkish bath is lim itless.
Those w ho a re too th in lielieve th a t they
will a tta in th e p lum pness o f th e ir sta n d
a rd of perfection by c o n tin u in g th e
baths. T hose w ho g ro a n w ith flesh th in k
th e b a th in g and th e ru b b in g w ill m ake
the burden roll a w ay ; th o se w hose com
plexions a re too pale o r too sallow seek
th ere color a n d clearness. T he pim pled
face ex p ec ts to grow sm ooth, th e flushed
face pale—in sooth, th ey th in k th e T u rk
ish bath th e real fo u n ta in of etern al
youth a n d beauty. W om en as ugly ami
old as th e W itch of E ndor h av e parboiled
them selves until th e sa p o f life has left
th eir sk in s like p a rc h m e n t, a n d th ey
have finally dried u p a n d blow n aw ay
on th e w ay from th e ir tri-w ee k ly trip s
to tho T u rk ish baths, w h ere th ey hoped
to grow fa t, fair, a n d 40 a t least, w hen
scragginoss a n d th e sev en ties had seized
them ten y e ars before.
One e n tire fa t fam ily o f social as well
as personal m ag n itu d e in th is c ity never
fails to send its a m p le supply o f d a u g h
te rs for a d ouche a n d a p o u n d in g every
T h u rsd ay : b u t p o u n d in g only seem s to
m ak e th em m ore pulpy. T hen th e r e a r e
th ree th in sisters w ho g o to g a in sy m
m etry ; a n d tlirco o th e r siste rs w h o h ave
th e n a tu ra l ro tu n d ity a n d rosiness of
stocky g irls only one g e n e ra tio n rem oved
from th e fa rm life of th e ir m o th e r's pa
ren tal p re cin cts, go fo r—w ell, for w hat?
P erhaps to g e t elongated; p erhaps to a c
quire a litllo o tb ere aliza tio n — heav en
know s for w h a t—p e rh a p s only for th e
fun of it. T h en th e re com es a tall g irl,
n e ith e r too th ic k nor too thill, too rosy
nor too pale, a n d , as is n a tu ra l, she in
clines to th e sto u t, sh o rt girls, a n d they
com pare n o tes on tho a d v a n ta g e s of
T urk ish b a th s.
SOUNDING THE MAN ALARM.
D r . J o r d a n ’ s office is a t t h e re s id e n c e
o f e x -M a y o r Y e s le r , T h i r d a n d J a m e s .
C o n s u lt a tio n a n d p r e s c r ip tio n s a O s o lu te -
ly FREE.
S e n d fo r fr e e b o o k e x p la in in g th e H is-
to g e n e tic s y s te m .
C a u t i o n . T h e H is to g e n t ie M e d ic in e s
a r e s o ld in b u t o n e a g e n c y In e a c h to w n .
T h e la b e l a r o u n d th e b o ttle b e a r s t h e fo l
lo w in g in s c r i p t i o n ; “ D r. J . E u g e n e J o r
d a n ’s I H s to g e n e ti c
M e d ic in e .”
E v e ry
o t h e r d e v ic e is a f r a u d .
VALUABLE
D IS C O V E R Y
B L IN D .
FO B
THE
Dr. La (»range w ishes to m ake know n his New
Trrntment for th e cure of all diseases of th e Eye
—Cataract, Defective Vision, Inflammation, etc.,
w ith o u t O peration or Pain. The rem edy can be
applied by the■patient, and is sim ple, safe and
sure in its effects, s tre n g th e n in g th e m uscles
a n d nerves of the eye. rem oving p a in a lm o st In
stan tan eo u sly . It is a m arvelous discovery aud
a blessing to the sufferer.
For fu rth er p a rtic u la rs address w ith stam ped
envelope K. J. L a G ran ge , M. D , 2L5 Powell dt.,
fourth door from Geary, San Francisco, Cal.
Office h o u rs—11 till 3.
A Pertinent 4}ne«tlnn.
Young Uoalin Mr Koks, 1 w ith —a r—that
It, I dtaire— e r—tba hand of your daughter.
R*»kt—W hat's the m atter with the reet of
her f— Judge.
“ W hat nam e, please?”
“ S m ith .”
“ Dear me!
How indefinite!”—-Lowell Citi
MunmUmtood.
Impresario—Do you ting cheat noteaf
8 ’guora H ariem otti-N o, tir! E vertthiug
In my reppytory is dead uew Judge.
Took the Hint end ««*»» Kven.
M iu H (h in tin g f<>r M r f to le a v e)—I
ahou'.d th in k > ou w ould ta k e co ld o u t here,
ü r . C .—Y e t, if y o u w ere th e w e a th e r 1
m ig h t; good u ig h t
NN est S h o r t.
Delteatelv Put.
H e I aru su re you w ould like n»y b ro th e r.
B he— I h a r e no d o u b t I should. I a m told
y ou tw o a r e eo d iffe re n t. —Epoch.
CO MP LE XI O N .- ,
W 1111
PIMPLY
raisin g chit kens. O ur
la r-e ii' 2 -page lllns-
trHted catalogue teils
all about
INCUBATORS,
Brooders, w het to feed
r i f f y i r c h i^ e iis , in fact nil
th e sec1 rets of tho
ch ick en business. If
ElmX
you only keep half a
dozeu hens, you need
f l ^ J t ^ t h i s book. It gives
more i n f o r m a t i o n
S f
th a n ,nim > Of th e
^
books eoM Rt 25 cents.
We send it free on re-
ceip t of 4 cents in
stam ps to pay postage
^
VASELINE
ONE E X JO Y S
Both the method and results when
>jyrup of Figs is taken; i t is pleasanf
and refreshing to the taste, and acts
gently yet promptly on the Kidneys,
Liver and Bowels, cleanses the sys
tem effectually, dispels colds, head
iches aud fevers and cures habitue
constipation permanently. For sale
in 5 0 c and $1 bottles by all druggists
CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO
ONE DOLLAR seut us by m ail, we w ill d e
F OR
liver, free of all charges, to an y person in t h e
.
. g ai a * lei c arefu lly
packed iu a neRt be*::
One tw o-ounce h«»ttle of P u re V aseline...10 cts.
One two-oun( e bottle V aseline P om ade...15 “
One ja r of Vascii ".e Cold C ream ...............15 “
One cake of V aseline C am phor Ice..........10 “
One cake of V aseline Soap, u n seen ted .... 10 “
One cake of Vaseline Soap, seem ed ..........25 “
One tw o-ounce bottle of W hite Vaseline.25 “
— 11
Or for stamps any single article at the price named.
It you have occasion to use Vaseline in any form be
careful to accept only genuine goods put up by u* in
original packages. A great ur.iiv druggists are trying to
persuade buyers 1« take VASELINE put up by them.
Never yield to such persuasion, as the article is an imi
tation without value and will n<-t give you the result you
•Ypeet. A bottle of Blue Seal Vaseline is sold by all
druggists at 10 cents
SAS FRANCISCO. CAL.
LOUISVILLE. KV.
NEW FORK. N t-
To t h e E d it o r : Please inform yo u r readers
th a t I have a po sitiv e remedy for the above-
nam ed disease. By its tim ely use th o u san d s of
hopeless cases have been p erm anently cured. I
shall be g lad to sen d tw o Dottles o l m y rem edy
free to any of your readers who have c o nsum p
tio n if they w ill send m e th e ir express a n d post-
office address. R espectfully,
T. A. SLOCUM, M. C..
181 Pearl street, New York.
Beware of im ita tio n s of the celebrated Seal of
North C arolina Plug Cut Tobacco.
T his T rado
M ark 13 cn
TACKLE
In th e world.
{■lend forflhutrated Catalotpie,
H.
T.
HUDSON,
9 3 F i r s t S t r e e t , P o r t l a n d , O r.,
— D E A L E R IN —
ARMS, REVOLVERS & SPORTSMEN'S GOODS.
Send for new illu stra te d catalogue.
m a n y people
^ ^ y
■
a B
Ï
are who regard the
^
coming of winter as a con
stant state of siege. It seems as if the elements sat down
outside the walls of health and now and again, led by the
north wind and his attendant blasts, broke over the
ramparts, spreading colds, pneumonia and death. Who
knows when the next storm may come and what its
effects upon your constitution may be ? The fortifica
tions of health must he made strong. SCOTT’S
EMULSION O f pure N orwegian Cod Liver Oil and
Hypophosphites of Lime and Soda will aid you to hold
out against Coughs, Colds, Consumption, Scrofula,
General Debility, and a ll A manic and lFasting
Diseases, until the siege is raised. It prevents toasting
in children.
Palatable as Milk.
H ow
there
Pop Corn, shelled, per 100 lb s........................... ?2 25
Kiee, b est q u a lity , im p o rted , 100 lb s............. 5 50
Silver Flake Hominy, 50-lb. b: i ........................ 2 25
Jap a n Tea, oh> st lots, lb........................... 10c to 35 *
Cooking R aisins, as w a n te d ........................5c to 6c
! *1 i<* i G rapes.................................................... ic to 5c
Eastern Codfish, e x tra ..................................Ho to 10c
V erm ont Syrup, qts .. ,25r, ’ gal». 50c, Kals. H 00
Pure Maple Syrup, 1-gal. c a n s ......................... l
Kock f’andy Drips (genuine), 5 g a ls ............... 3 00
Table Grapes, finest q u aliry , doz.................... 1 (50
rab le Pi tms, finest q u a lity , do*...................... ! go
Axle Grease, best, 50 lb s ............. ...................... 2 50
Alfalfa, finest seed, 100 lbs................................ h 75
W rite for copy, free, of forty page catalogue;
c o n tain s price or se r rftl th o n sau d articles. Ad-
• ir
S u u ( l i > ( a ^ i i * t o r e , 11G ii m l 118
F r o n t S tr e e t, Nun I r a n i i^co.
The a M ressesof all soldiers w ho
W A IT E D
homesteaded, a less n u m b e r of
S O L D IE R S acres th a n 160 an d m ade d u a l
J nroof ou the sam e ’ eforc J u n e
>22. 1ST S. W. E. MOSES. I* O.
'65, 1 euv.-r, Colo. M ention th is paper.
WANTED
TO EMPLOY
ia t S iB
• »in nil .it ■ > i• r
>• Annual Benefit Society of
.
.
P hiladelphia, l a.,Eu«lo which t P. an , dou b lin g o u r
money in one \ ear. A dm its ladies aiN g en ts from
14 to 70; pays sick benefits: is nor a secret o rd e r;
das over 'J.obo mem bers in 17 States, 97 lodges of
th is o rder in P hiladelphia. Lndyor g e n tlem an cun
secure th is a t once, w ith full j»irti u lars, by ad-
dressii i \ \ . 11. I O O M 1 S ,
. i r . , D eputy
suprem e C ouncilor for th e Pacific Coa-t, A la
meda C alifornia. Box 367.
to r6 m o n th s at a cost of Lucent a dozen, a n d e a n -
tot tie d istin g u ish ed from fresh eggs Full diree-
ions sent for *1. JAMES MORSE. 917 Kddy st.,S.F.
r fAi] 'r.,.,,
£
P
SPRING
GOODS
NOW
READY.
A. B. STEINBAGH A CO.. POPULAR ONE-PRICE CLOTHIERS AND HATTERS,
Before you buy anyhhingAsk two questions
.“Bol re&lly>-y 4 f i ^ î ^ Ç &n 1 cio - *
-w ant i t ^ r r î V
-À ^ without ìtr
r r u n
these quesHoris^to-j^may mdtkeyou rich:
but they will never 7 !!to?!prevent you from
buying S A P O L I O
M í > IV S t v ie —W ell, telep h o n e to y o u r pa
to te n d a boy to ««'me e m p lo y m e n t office fo r
on*». I n tv d «tune z e p h y r t-> m a tc h th is silk,
to o ; b u t I sup;»«!*o 1 w ill h a v e to go fo r th a t
m y «elf. New V- r k W eekly.
1 > . U i
3 blotchy, oilj tfc a, red , rough b tn d i, w ith
chaps, p a in fu l Buffer ends an d shapeless n ails,
aud sim ple babv humor» prevented aiul cu red
by Ci Ti< t r a .S oap , a m arvelous beautiiler of
World.w ide celebrity. it is sim ply im «imparable
as a skiii-i* iri/yiLK nap, u u eq u aled for th e to i
ler au d w ithout a rival for th e nursery. Abso
lutely p u it, delicately m edicated, ex q u isitely
perfum ed. i ' ctut ha S oai * produces th e w hitest,
clearest skin aud .-ofteat h e a d s, ami prevents
inflam m ation au*! clopgimt of th e pores, th e
cause of pimple», b lackheads a n d most com plex-
louai <! d’liu ra t.• >fi-. w hile it a d m its of uo com
parison w ith th e bc»t of "tlier skiu so ap s aud
rivals in delicacy the m ost noted aud exp en siv e
of toilet an d uur.»t ry .-caps, bale g reater th a n
th e com bine 1 sales " f all o th e r skin soaps,
bold th ro u g h o u t th e world. Price, 25c.
S eu l for ‘ H o w to (Jure .»kin and Blood Dis
eases.”
Aiidre s P otter D a ro and C hem ical C orpo
ration , proprietors, Boston, Mass.
a . i.iu .
Hiel i hi k. weak klU ueja au d
'h eu m atism relieved in one m in u te by th e
•elebratf.il Ci Ttt bka A s t i P ain P la st e r .25 c
PETALUMA INCUBATOR CO., P e ta lu m a , Cal.
T he m o th e r of nine c h ild re n , w hose
frien d s tell h e r she "d o e sn 't look a day
older" (th a n w hom o r when?), com es re g
ularly , a n d says, “ it's th e T u rk ish bath
does i t.” T lte phrase m ay lie a little
prom iscuous, b u t it seem s to bo u n d e r
stood by h e r frien d s a n d fellow bathers.
A fte r h e r w ill com e a b eau tifu l m atro n
of ten y e a rs’ stan d in g , w ho nev er had
any c h ild re n , a n d h e r a cq u a in ta n ce s will
tell h e r sh e n e v er looked so b eau tifu l
and stro n g , a n d c o n g ratu la te h e r on the
good tim e s she has goin g a ro u n d th e
w orld a n d hav in g no c h ild ren to keep
SP E C IA L .—S c o tt’s E m ulsion to non-secret, a n d is p re scrib ed by th e Medical Pro
her a t hom o, a n d w ind u p by sa y in g sho
fession all o v e r the w o rld , because its in g re d ie n ts are scientifically com bined in such a
looks y o u n g e r th an ever, a n d she says, it
m a n n e r a s to g re a tly inc re a se th e ir re m e d ia l value.
is all th e T u rk ish bath.
T hen a w idely kn o w n teacher, wise
C A U T IO N .—S c o tt’s E m u lsio n is p u t u p in salm on-colored w rap p ers. Be su re an d
a n d lea rn ed , w ill be heard tellin g a pale
get th e g e n u in e . P re p a re d only by S cott Ac Bow ne, M an u factu rin g C hem ists, New York.
little D a n te w om an th a t n o th in g so helps
to c le a r th e b rain and p u t sp rin g in to the
v e rte b ra a n d m ake keen tho nerves,
ISO ’S R E M E D Y FO R C A T A R R H .—Best. E asi
whfeli, linelogged, aid all th e fa cu ltie s
est to use. Cheapest. Relief is im m ediate. A
to digest th e learn ed d isse rtatio n s o f the
cure is certain. F or Cobi in the H ead it has no equal.
do cto rs now ex p o u n d in g d o c trin es o f the
flesh a n d th o devil a s giv en fo rth by
G oethe a t th e g uild room s of St. G eorge's,
a s a th o ro u g h m assage o f th e physical
w om an.
It is an O intm ent, of which a small particle ia applied
to the nostrils. I’rice 50c. Noli1 by druggists or sent by
A su ffra g ist, tossing w ildly on a hard
m
ail.
A ddress;
E . T . J ' . z i l t i n e , W arren, P a.
couch n e a r by, from w h ich she can see
the clock, w hose w a rn in g h o u r hand
sta n d s a t h alf-past l i , notes th e fa c t th a t T H E P R A C T IC A L F E A T U R E S O F O U R M A IL D E P A R T M E N T
“ we m ust all I k * g e ttin g o u t of h ere p re tty W ill com m end them selves at once to out-of-tow u cousum ers. who have not th e facilities of visit
soon for those sellislt m en, w ho w a n t th e in g o u r estab lish m en t and m aking a personal selection of a n y th in g w anted.
place a t 1 o'clock. W hen w om en can
vote we ll c h an g e all th is ," " I hope yon
sam ples w ith rules for s«Af-measurement w ill be sent on application.
w on't vote to let th e nten in d u rin g th e
w om en's ho u rs," exclaim ed th e horrified
w om an of calcu lu s und belles lettres.
BOX 4 3 6 .
PO RTLA N D , O R EC O N .
"N o! w ait till 1 g et m y corsets o n ," cries
a beauty from Iter dressin g room who
has only heard “ m en " m entioned, and
site im m ediately ap p lies th e ra b b it's foot
to Iter cheeks, ties do w n her laco veil and
goes e>ut w ith a last in ju n c tio n to her
bather lo " ta k e c a re of m y te rry blanket
Stim o C 'urlotm M U n o n irrn .
and th in g s"—a n d w ith h e r faeo to w a rd
A rabie ligure* w ere InvoutcU by the
th e door to get th e tirs t glim pse of any
Indians, not by th e A ral«.
of those' " h o rrid n ten" w h o m ay be com
c k l u
lb ilc li clocks aro n o t o f D utch, but
.G J l . . ^
.
ing, sin* looks o ver th o re g is te r a s she
F o r p th m ig h t.
G orm an (doniseli) m a n u fa ctu re .
signs Iter nam e anil re ad s th e re in a list
She—Oh, horrors!
Irish stuw is a dish u n k n o w n In Ire
of th e best know n n a m e s in th e c ity .—
He—W hat is it, darling?
land.
Sho 1 forgot all about |>xrr puwv, left in St. Louis Republic.
Baffin's Uiv ia no hay a t all.
tho house alone, and we off for a week. She’ll
Cal g u t is th o g u t of sheep, n o t o f c a ts starve.
T here has Ivon b egun in T aris a c am
Down is used instead of a-dow n and
He—O, 1 remembered her. I left a can of
utterly pervert« its m eaning. Tho Saxon condensed milk on the kitchen table with a paign ag ain st tra in e d n u rses, a n d a re
tu rn to tho old sy stem o f n u rsin g by Sis
dun is a hill, and a-d u n is its opposite, a sardine opener beside it.—Life.
ters of C harity h a s been stro n g ly a d v o
d e sc e n t G oing dow n sta irs really m eans
IM fltlrd P u tir« .
cated. it is alleged th a t tho m o rta lity
going u p s t u r a
Wo o u g h t pro|<erly to
Daughter—Ma, the new girl has got mad iu hospital« is 4 (v r c en t, h ig h e r «tuce
■ay “ going «-dow n.” — D etroit Free
and gone, and we ll have to got another right th e in tro d u c tio n of tra in e d nurse«.
l ‘resa
A
off
Other Lient I fleet Ion Seeded.
H ow d o e s h e fe e l ?y-H e feels so
full after eatin r a meat that he can
hardly w alk—A u g u s t F lo w e r th e
Remedy.
“ A re you still th e c ity toastm aster?"
“ No. I g ave u p m y post som e tim e ago;
but 1 am th e q u e en ’s bailiff a t th e cen
tra l c rim in al c o u rt, and um one of the
oldest se rv an ts c f th e corp o ratio n ."
“ How m any d in n ers have you put
th ro u g h in y o u r official capacity?”
“ F our th o u san d and n in e ty .”
•‘Most of the g re a t speakers you have
heard ta k e som ething to keep th e ir voice
In trim?"
“ W ell, D israeli, for Instance, alw ays
had Itis b u tle r liehind him w ith a bottle
of egg a n d Bherry, w hich he had ready
m ixed. Mr. G ladstone, I have noticed,
tak e s sh e rry , b u t no egg. T he I’rince of
W ales, he likes hock and cham pagne.
T he D uke of E d in b u rg h , his se rv an t al
w ays brings his special brand w ith him
—a R ussian c h a m p a g n e .”
ARTIFICIAL
D id n 't K now W h ic h .
“ W h a t i t th e m a tte r , A lice!
Its uses are w a v y and so are its frien ds;
for where it is once used it is alw ays used. To
clean house without it is sheer folly, since it does
the work twice as fast and twice as well.
PCiSON
IN
A
PIP E
Few flmokers fully realize the
danger of sm oking new or im prop
erly cured Tobacco. The m edical
staff of the G erm an arm y discov
ered th is was a fruitful source of
th ro a t disease.
The subsistence departm ent of
the IT. S. Army have adopted Seal
of N orth C arolina Plug Cut as the
S tan d ard Sm oking Tobacco for the
arm y.
Beware of Im itatio n s. The gen
uine “ Seal of N orth C a ro lin a ”
costs you no more than poisonous
im itations.
Ail) HAY YUt
f >r
TALUNO
VilCObt
l'Tjr-r- a - i J i f HY0CS D iU m r T i
■■’e ike- « of Body c.nd ■ind, Ltffcta
I :.f Errors c rE j-‘ '« ssìr Old or Yeung,
HOOD V*» P*.- r* b Ke* !• ewîê-** na4
\ FHiurv)- , »''ArirvTvor
, rili'lt.
fT-d-efRi li k diy.
île* ».te* f *reb ■ t ««»»r1»». Writ#
anv »we¿.veo tattled -«»'es' fr*«#
------- — CO
t o ^ l ’*rALO.
Y.
P»C4U
Y o n look
worried. "
“ la m . Ife too mean for anything! Those
re te s h a r e just com e w ith a cani. H *nr tb **e
fo r J a c k , ’ and I d o n 't k n o w w h e th e r th e y
are from th e J n*k 1 h a te o r th e cue I lik *
I t ’s too h o r r id :”— H a r p e r ’t B azar.
l o n tp liiu e n ta r y .
■»‘. ire*—S«« w a s t uic« shews 1 p u r
JAMES
LEFFEL
T H E
M in » Quima a Why, theee I'm wearing
octet $10.
Mite C —Weil, 1 suppoea th ey » harg a ac-
oordiug to site —Ohio S ta te Jo u rn al.
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* • « e n d F R E E lo « h o t« d e s ir in g in f o r m a
lio n , th a F in e s t P a m p h le t P u b lis h e d .
3FR IIT C 3T B L D , OHIO, or Liberty St, NEW YORK CITY,