HOME & LIVING
B2 — THE OBSERVER & BAKER CITY HERALD
TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 22, 2022
Reminding ourselves to bake for the fun of it
By DANIEL NEMAN
St. Louis Post-Dispatch
It was such an ordi-
nary phrase, and tossed off
so casually, that I almost
did not notice it. And even
then, it took a second to
register.
This was a few months
ago, and I was watching
one of the last episodes of
the most recent season of
“The Great British Baking
Show.” Perhaps the most
ebullient of the remaining
four contestants, Crystelle
Pereira, says she wants to
concentrate on the baking
and “just enjoy it.”
Just enjoy it.
First of all, have you
ever heard any competitor
on any American cooking
show ever talk about
enjoying it?
American contestants
aren’t there to enjoy it,
they are there to win. The
thought of enjoyment never
crosses their minds. They
are far too concerned with
the correct temperature to
roast their Brussels sprouts
or wondering whether
anchovies taste good with
fi re-roasted tomatoes.
I’m sure Pereira wanted
to win, too, or at least do
as well as she possibly
could. But in an unguarded
moment, she revealed her
true motivation. She just
wanted to have fun.
For Pereira, and for
many of us, baking is fun.
As I write this, I have a
loaf of bread in the oven. I
don’t have to have a loaf of
bread in the oven. I could
buy an excellent loaf at any
neighborhood grocery store,
and I could get an even
better than excellent loaf at
a nearby bakery.
It isn’t the money, though
that bakery bread gets
awfully pricey. I bake bread
for the fun.
I bake cakes for the fun.
I bake pies, or at least pie
crusts, for the fun. I bake
cookies because I like
cookies.
This is new to me. I have
always thought of myself as
a cook, not a baker. Baking
relies on precise measure-
ment, and I am a master of
imprecision. That is why
I am a cook; I can throw a
handful of one ingredient
into a pan of another ingre-
dient and wind up with
something delicious.
It’s enjoyable. But maybe
it isn’t straight-up, sheer,
unadulterated fun, like
baking.
Is it the butter? Is it the
sugar? Is it the fl our?
Maybe it is the fact
that I can use my hands to
play with my food. There
is something deeply sat-
isfying, on a primal level,
in the texture of a smooth,
soft, pliant dough. There is
something magical about
seeing a yeast dough rise.
Perhaps it is the way
a small handful of basic
ingredients can be com-
bined to yield such diff erent
results. The same building
blocks are used to make
bagels and doughnuts, bis-
cuits and brownies, muffi ns
and sweet rolls and scones.
Immediate gratifi ca-
tion plays a part, too. Once
you’ve mixed together the
ingredients, which rarely
takes long, you can pop
them in the oven to bake.
As soon as they are cooled,
you can eat them.
The same is true of
cooking, of course. But
what comes out of the oven
is diff erent.
With cooking, you may
end up with fried chicken,
or stir-fried pork, or a vege-
table terrine.
But with baking, you
get bread or dessert. And
everyone knows those are
the best parts of any meal.
Just enjoy it.
Tinkering with TikTok recipes
By DANIEL NEMAN
St. Louis Post-Dispatch
The worst pain of my life
was when I was affl icted
with kidney stones. If I ever
have another, and I am dou-
bled over in unbearable
agony, at least I will know
that it could be worse.
I could be watching
TikTok.
I had spent my entire
life without once going on
TikTok. I had never even
been tempted. Though I did
not realize it at the time,
I was living in a state of
grace.
Then my editor decided
it might make a good
story if I cooked some of
the more popular TikTok
recipes.
My editor hates me.
TikTok, if you are bliss-
fully unaware, is an app on
which people from around
the world post incred-
ibly stupid videos. There
is some sort of a time
limit and they are meant
to be short, but many
of them seem positively
interminable.
To familiarize myself
with the concept, I watched
as many as I could stand,
back to back. Several fea-
tured the same boy with
clear blue eyes who does
weird things to his hair.
Others showed people lip-
syncing to songs or rhyth-
mically contorting them-
selves in what is meant to
be a dance. Most of the
rest appear to be videos of
cats and dogs, often with
humans speaking for them
in squeaky voices.
But it is not just a site for
narcissists to draw atten-
tion to themselves and their
pets. It is also a place for
narcissists to show the rec-
ipes they have cooked.
One of the biggest
TikTok recipes is some-
thing called Mermaid
Toast. Invented in 2017
(but everything on TikTok
is new to me), Mermaid
Toast is toast with cream
cheese that has been tinted
with swirls of color made
with such ingredients as
liquid chlorophyll and algae
powder, and decorated with
edible gold leaf and edible
glitter.
When all is said and
done, it’s still just toast
with cream cheese.
I did not make Mer-
maid Toast, but I did decide
to make perhaps the most
popular TikTok recipe ever,
Baked Feta Pasta, which is
more correctly known as
TikTok Pasta.
TikTok recipes tend to
be easy to make, and this
one is, too. It’s just pasta
cooked with feta cheese,
cherry tomatoes, basil and
olive oil.
Or, if we’re being
honest, it’s pasta cooked
with too much feta cheese,
cherry tomatoes, basil and
too much olive oil.
The dish was popular-
ized on TikTok, though not
invented, by Yumna Jawad.
She uses eight ounces of
feta cheese and four ounces
of olive oil to go with eight
uncooked ounces of pasta.
In a video she shot about
the dish, she says it makes
eight servings.
But it doesn’t. A serving
of pasta is offi cially two
ounces, not one, and most
Americans eat more than
that. So you are actu-
ally getting two ounces
of cheese and two table-
spoons of oil per serving
(Jawad, incidentally, says
it is 1 ½ tablespoons of oil
per serving. You don’t have
to be good at math to be on
TikTok).
How does it taste?
Frankly, it tastes like too
much feta cheese. But oth-
erwise, it’s a decent dish.
If you plan to make it, I’d
highly recommend using
four ounces of feta and ¼
cup of oil.
I next tried my hand
at making Cloud Bread,
which is thematically sim-
ilar to Mermaid Toast.
That is, its look is more
important than its taste.
Cloud Bread is egg
whites whipped to stiff
peaks with sugar and corn-
starch, and then baked at a
low temperature.
Wait a minute. You can’t
fool me. That isn’t bread,
that is a soft meringue.
But here’s the thing. Soft
meringue is usually served
with something. Served
with a crème anglaise
(a vanilla custard) it is a
fl oating island. Served with
a raspberry coulis, it is soft
meringue on raspberry
coulis.
Cloud Bread is served
by itself, so it is just a
meringue without enough
sugar to be interesting. It
tastes like whipped egg
whites, and smells worse.
You can certainly add
vanilla to it, and then it
tastes like whipped egg
whites with vanilla. It’s
an improvement, but only
marginal.
And then I made a
TikTok KitKat Cheese-
cake, which is what it
sounds like. It is an extra-
rich cheesecake surrounded
by KitKat candy bars, with
chocolate ganache on top
and more crushed KitKat
candy bars on top of that.
In other words, it is a
cheesecake with nearly
a pound of candy on it,
plus chocolate. And heavy
cream.
By my calculation, it has
more than 900 calories per
serving, and the servings
aren’t large.
TikTok KitKat Cheese-
cake was invented by an
Englishwoman, Eloise
Head. Based on the nutri-
tional content of her cre-
ation, I would guess she is
still upset about the Revo-
lutionary War and is taking
out her anger on Americans
who cook TikTok recipes.
For the record, I will
acknowledge that the
cheesecake part of the
recipe is light and fl uff y
and quite good — and even
without the crust or the
chocolate ganache or any
of the candy bars, it is still
288 calories per serving.
The last Tik I Tokked
was the best, TikTok
Salmon Rice Bowl. Created
by Emily Mariko, it mixes
cooked salmon together
with rice, soy sauce, sri-
racha sauce and Kewpie
mayonnaise.
Yeah, good luck with
that. Kewpie mayonnaise
is currently the hottest con-
diment in America, and it
immediately sells out any-
where you look for it. Made
in Japan, Kewpie is said to
be a savory, egg yolk-rich
mayo. If you fi nd it, let me
know how it is.
I used Hellmann’s. And
in keeping with Mariko’s
video, I served it with avo-
cado, kimchi and nori
seaweed.
Basically, the dish is a
very simple salmon donburi
— a Japanese dish of rice
with, in this case, salmon
on it. By defi nition, donburi
is served in a bowl; I used a
plate, but if you want to be
traditional you could put it
in a deep bowl.
The smooth, fatty
salmon is cut by the salty
soy sauce, with the piquant
fi re of the sriracha tamed
by the mayonnaise. Eaten
on a piece of seaweed
(optional, of course), with
kimchi on the side (also
optional), it is a marvelous
combination.
But I’m not going to go
back on TikTok to look for
another.
TIKTOK PASTA
Yield: 4 servings
2 pints cherry tomatoes
¼ cup extra virgin olive
oil, see note
teaspoon sea salt
¼ teaspoon black pepper
4 ounces feta cheese, see note
2 garlic cloves, minced
¼ cup packed chopped fresh
basil, plus more for serving
8 ounces dried pasta (small is best)
Note: To make the original
recipe, use 8 ounces feta
cheese and ½ cup olive oil.
1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
Place the cherry tomatoes in a
9-by-13-inch baking dish. Pour the
olive oil on top, and season with
salt and pepper. Toss until well
combined.
2. Place the feta in the middle
of the baking dish surrounded by
the cherry tomatoes, and stir or
fl ip to coat it with the olive oil and
seasoning; keep the feta in the
middle of the pan.
3. Bake 35 minutes, until the
cherry tomatoes burst, and the
feta cheese melts.
4. While the tomatoes and feta
are baking, cook the pasta in a
pot of salted water according
to package instructions until al
dente. Drain, reserving ½ cup of
the cooking liquid.
5. Immediately add the garlic
and basil leaves to the cooked
Hillary Levin/St. Louis Post-Dispatch-TNS
TikTok Salmon Rice Bowl, a dish inspired by a TikTok video.
tomatoes and feta and toss every-
thing to combine.
6. Transfer the cooked pasta
to the baking dish and toss to
combine. Add the reserved cook-
ing liquid if the sauce is too dry.
Garnish with more fresh basil and
serve warm.
Per serving: 435 calories; 21
g fat; 6 g saturated fat; 25 mg
cholesterol; 13 g protein; 50 g
carbohydrate; 7 g sugar; 4 g fi ber;
416 mg sodium; 173 mg calcium
— Adapted from a TikTok
recipe by Yumna Jawad
CLOUD BREAD
Yield: 2 servings
3 large egg whites
2 ½ tablespoons granulated sugar
1 tablespoon cornstarch
¼ teaspoon vanilla
extract, optional
Food coloring, optional
1. Preheat oven to 300 degrees.
Line a baking sheet with parch-
ment paper.
2. With an electric mixer on
medium-high, whisk the egg
whites until frothy. Add the sugar
1 tablespoon at a time and whisk
on high until small bubbles form.
Add the cornstarch and optional
vanilla and food coloring. Whisk
until peaks of egg white stand
straight up when you lift out the
whisk.
3. Place meringue on prepared
baking sheet and mold into a
mound or cloud shape. Bake until
lightly brown, 20 to 25 minutes.
4. Serve immediately. The cloud
defl ates with time.
Per serving: 102 calories; no fat;
no saturated fat; no cholesterol; 5
g protein; 20 g carbohydrate; 16 g
sugar; 2 g fi ber; 83 mg sodium; 4
mg calcium
— Recipe by iamafoodblog.
com
TIKTOK KITKAT
CHEESECAKE
11 tablespoons butter, melted
16 ounces cream cheese
1 cup powdered sugar, packed
2 ½ cups heavy cream, divided
4 ounces semisweet chocolate
Note: Digestive biscuits are a
traditional English cookie.
They can be found in the
international food aisles of
many grocery stores and in
international markets.
1. Stand up 32 KitKat fi ngers
around the inside of an 8-inch
cake pan, preferably springform.
In a bowl, mix together the cookie
crumbs and butter, and pour into
the cake pan. Press down on the
mixture until it is fi rm and even.
2. With an electric mixer, whisk
together the cream cheese and
powdered sugar until smooth.
Add 2 cups of the heavy cream
and mix until smooth and thick.
Pour this mixture over the base
and use a spoon to make smooth.
Refrigerate at least 5 hours.
3. Break the remaining 6 KitKat
fi ngers into small pieces.
4. Chop or break the choco-
late into small pieces and place
in a heatproof bowl. In a small
pot, bring the remaining ½ cup
cream to a boil and pour over
the chopped chocolate (if using
anything other than heavy cream,
bring to just below a boil before
pouring). Wait 1 minute and stir
until smooth and thoroughly
mixed.
5. Pour this chocolate mixture
over the top of the cheesecake.
Top with the chopped pieces of
KitKat. Cover and refrigerate at
least 2 hours.
Per serving: 852 calories; 58
g fat; 33 g saturated fat; 118 mg
cholesterol; 8 g protein; 57 g car-
bohydrate; 42 g sugar; 2 g fi ber;
251 mg sodium; 118 mg calcium
— Adapted from a recipe by
Eloise Head, via TikTok
TIKTOK
SALMON RICE
BOWL
Yield: 2 servings
1 (6-ounce) salmon fi llet
1 teaspoon oil
1 ½ cups cooked rice
1 tablespoon soy sauce
1 tablespoon sriracha
1 tablespoon mayonnaise,
preferably Kewpie brand
1 avocado, sliced
Nori seaweed, optional
Kimchi, optional
1. Season salmon with salt and
pepper, and cook in oil a small
skillet over medium-high heat
until browned on both sides and
cooked all the way through, about
4 minutes on one side and 3
minutes on the other, depending
on the size of the salmon.
2. Finely mash salmon with a
fork in a large bowl, and add rice.
If using leftover rice, place 1 ice
cube on top, cover with parch-
ment paper and microwave 1
minute. Discard parchment and
ice cube. (If rice is freshly cooked,
skip this part.)
3. Add soy sauce and stir until
mixed. Garnish with sriracha, may-
onnaise and avocado. If desired,
serve on snack-sized pieces of nori
seaweed, with kimchi on the side.
Per serving: 500 calories; 24g
fat; 3 g saturated fat; 46 mg
cholesterol; 26 g protein; 50 g
carbohydrate; 2 g sugar; 6 g fi ber;
1,136 mg sodium; 51 mg calcium.
M ICHAEL
541-786-8463
M. Curtiss PN-7077A CCB# 183649
Yield: 10 servings
38 KitKat fi ngers, divided
3 ½ cups crushed digestive
biscuits (cookies) or graham
crackers, see note
A C ERTIFIED M ASTER A RBORIST
When your computer is in despair
OUTSTANDING
COMPUTER REPAIR
Fast and Reliable
MOBILE COMPUTER SUPPORT
DALE BOGARDUS 541-297-5831
215 Elm Street La Grande • (541) 963-5440
northwestfurnitureandmattress.com