10B — THE OBSERVER & BAKER CITY HERALD THuRSDAY, JunE 18, 2020 COFFEE BREAK Woman runs low on patience for friend’s drama-filled life DEAR ABBY: My friend “Kate” has had a lot of trauma in her life, and she feels things very deeply. She has experienced assault, the suicide of a close friend, the death of several family mem- bers, discovered she can’t have children, and managed to escape an abusive relationship, all in the last five years or so. Kate does all the things people are supposed to do when coping with grief and is doing very well. The problem is me. I find it hard to be around her because of all the drama. Intellectually, I under- stand none of this is Kate’s fault. She isn’t being attention-seeking or deliberately causing drama. But I find myself becoming impa- tient with her ongoing discussion of feelings. I’m not someone who feels deeply or is easily trauma- tized. Bad things happen, I get over it and move on. How can I learn DEAR to be the patient, caring friend she ABBY needs? — TRYING TO BE A BETTER FRIEND DEAR TRYING: Quit being so hard on yourself. You are and have been a good friend. It’s important that you not allow Kate’s burdens to “sink” you. The two of you are very different people, and you should explain that to her as you have to me. If her trauma and drama become more than you can healthfully absorb, step back and tell her you will talk with her later, tomorrow or when it is convenient for you both, which will allow you time to come up for air. DEAR ABBY: I am self-quar- antined for a number of reasons because of the virus. I am 87 and live alone. My daughter is very concerned that I not become ill because her husband is in treat- ment for cancer. Obviously, she doesn’t want to have to come care for me and endanger her hus- band’s already reduced immunity. A friend called to ask how I am doing. I told her I was self-quar- antined, and she asked if I needed anything. I told her I didn’t have eggs, but it was no big deal. She said she would bring me some. I sent her a text and asked her to leave them on the porch, and she said, “You mean you won’t let me in the house?” She said she isn’t sick and can’t understand why I’m doing this. I tried to explain that you can be contagious without symptoms, but she was still insulted. I thought everyone in the world knew the basics of quarantine, but apparently she’s still taking it per- sonally. She hasn’t called for three days, and I’m heartsick. Advice? — SHUT IN IN ARIZONA DEAR SHUT IN: In spite of the fact that the federal, state and local governments are releasing information on a daily basis about the importance of social dis- tancing and self-quarantining, there is still confusion in the minds of some of the public. Your friend is a perfect example of this. You are doing what you’re doing for the right reason, and I hope you will continue, not only for your son-in-law’s sake, but also for your own. DEAR ABBY: I’ve been mar- ried five years, and I just discov- ered that my husband still has several text messages from his late wife. He thinks I shouldn’t be upset about it. Am I wrong for asking him to delete them? — FEELING BETRAYED DEAR FEELING BETRAYED: Yes, you are! Do not compete with a deceased spouse. Hanging on to memen- toes is a way many people grieve. If the texts hold significance for him, let him have them. You’re his wife now, and that’s what matters. Eiffel Tower to reopen after longest closure since WWII By Thomas Adamson Associated Press PARIS — Workers are preparing the Eiffel Tower for reopening next week, after the coronavirus pan- demic led to the iconic Paris landmark’s longest closure since World War II. France’s tourism industry is opening back up, but the 324-meter (1,063-feet) tall wrought- iron tower won’t imme- diately welcome visitors the way it did before the country went into lock- down in March. Only limited numbers of people will be allowed in when the Eiffel Tower opens again on June 25. Elevators to the top will be out of service, at least at first, and only the first and second floors will be accessible to the public. “At first, only visits by the stairs will be avail- able,” Victoria Klahr, the spokeswoman for the tow- er’s management, said Tuesday. Everyone over 11 years old will be required to wear face masks, and crowd control measures will be in place. “We are optimistic that visitor numbers will pick up, even if it will likely be local tourists who visit the monument in the first weeks,” Klahr said. The tower’s director told The Associated Press on Tuesday that he hopes access will be back to normal by August. A stringent cleaning operation is in place and will continue daily from next week. “There is a new pro- tocol,” said Eiffel Tower hygiene consultant Alain Miralles. “The day cleaning teams will be able to clean all the points of contact every two hours, from the opening of the site to its closing,” Tourists planning trips to the City of Light are advised to book tickets to visit the Eiffel Tower online once the ticket office reopens Thursday. Paris tourism officials AP Photo/Michel Euler People stroll at Trocadero square near the Eiffel Tower in Paris, Monday, May 25, 2020, as France gradually lifts its Covid-19 lockdown. In Paris, where all city parks remain closed, residents stroll along the Seine river and outside the Tuileries Gardens. have expressed muted optimism about the city’s reemergence as a travel destination. Since con- finement measures were imposed in March, tourism levels have dropped by around 80% compared to the same month in pre- vious years, they say. “To visit Paris now is quite exceptional, as we of course don’t have many visitors and we don’t expect this summer to be at the same level as pre- vious ones,” Corinne Men- egaux, the director of Par- is’s businesses and tourism office, told The AP. Hotel owners are also keen to welcome visitors again, if realistic about the challenges ahead — and the competition among European countries to draw tourists back in the coronavirus era. “Everyone is Europe is looking to draw the Euro- pean clientele. The Ital- ians want to bring in the French, the Germans want to attract the Danes,” said Serge Cachan, president of France’s Astotel Group. He pointed out the plexiglass protections in the reception area of one of his hotels and arrows to ensure social distancing. He welcomed the French president’s deci- sion Sunday to let Paris restaurants reopen earlier than planned. “Without restaurants, there is no conviviality, there is no tourism, there are no cli- ents in hotels,” he said in an interview. “The message I would like to on-pass to the city of Paris is: Hurry and open up all of the tourist attrac- tions and activities.”