Peculiar toe Itself
In arte lion, proportion and combination
of Ingredienta.
In th priKtH by which their remedial
value are ritrarted and preerrved.
In efleitlveneaa, uerfultiea an J economy.
Curing tli wideat rang of diK-aera.
Ixilnit tlie moat jood for the money.
Having the moat medicinal merit.
Anif the rrValeat fMvft nf rt
Hood's Sarsaparilla
In usual liquid form or In chocolated
tablet known a SarsatabS. lubdoeea $L
Waroe Vat.
The tlmoroua Chinaman fled with agllit
T, but the bojre grabbed hi (J and yelled
"Kill It!"
Tbro the cut off the aald
Q cIom to bia bead,
While be rinncej around like P ia
akillet.
Qearreleotae Pereaa.
The niUtrtus of the house a lira ye
goes itralght to the point, says a writer
lu I'unrh. "Why dIJ you leave your
laat place?" ahe tiluntly aaked the ap
plicant for houiteiiiuld's place.
"I couldn't stand the way mistress
nd muNinr used to quarrel, mum.
"Dear me, did tbey quarrel Tery
often?"
"Ve, mum. When 'twasn't me an'
in, 'twaa uie an' 'er."
The
General Demand
of the Well-informed of the World baa
alway been for a almple, pleasant
and efficient liquid laxative remedy of
known value; a laxative wblcb phys!
clan could sanction fur family use
because Its component parti are
known to them to be wholeaome and
truly beneficial la effect, acceptable
to the system and gentle, yet prompt,
In action.
In supplying that demand with It
excellent combination of Syrup of
TlK and Elixir of Senna, the Call
fornla Fig Syrup Co. proceed along
ethical line and rellea on the merit
of the laxative for Ita remarkable
auccess.
That I one of many reason why
Syrup of Fig and Elixir of Senna I
given the preference by the Well
informed. To get Its beneficial effect
alway buy the genuine manufac
tured by the California Fig Syrup Co.,
only, and for sal by all leading
druggists. Price fifty cents per bottle.
MADE
FOR i
SERVICE
and guaranteed
absolutely
WATERPROOF
It-I
"end
OILED SUITS. SUCCESS
AND HAli
fCvery garment guaranteed
Clean Liglit Durable
Suits 32 5lkker32?
joturfitBtMm imrwHit
UIM04 rut or far auih
Trips to California
OVEV
"TheRoadofaThous
and Wonders"
From Portland to Los Angeles
Through San Francisco
An ertlmle book with 114 heautlful
rnlorad lili'tun-a tiaa l-n fuhllahed by
the Homtieru t'aritte Company lllu.t rat
ing anil 1. rl tln the amentum ot
ihia wninlirlul mail and Hie rnmiiry
thriinith which It ia..ea. Il pat) lie oh
teiti.'l hy Bunding lis crnta to t'baa. S.
Kee, I'aatpi kit lialtlr Mtiiinnr, roiiin
IN7, Vliiiitl HuilitliiK. !an fr'rancieco.t.al.,
or the unilirnlffm il.
V hin you git ready to o F.at retnom
her that yon run nave l wo-third. of a ilny
ettil piiJiit a thrniiirh trip diri'ct tut'lil
i i llln. ul rhante, flmt or ... nt
rlaaa, by I'lin liali g nur Mrki-t over the
l. K AN. Hhnrl line, I lilcin fai'lllc
and rhu-aio A NnriliwrMrru. AilJri'M
or ai i'ly in any o. K A N. aviMit Inr
nnT ioinilit.i Information. Wm. Mi
Mur ay, t.meral I'aa enger Agent, 1'ort
lanij, ( itpgnu.
"Mia aiiTtri !
True to Nature
The New Victor Talking Machine with teper
llll arm brlngi ry k mil nl inuale anil ami
to your home It brine t her, to iav the tal
ent that li.iwe Kiii-nulil not aeenre (or ev.n on
iiigtit. Magnmivnt ban I .elictiim, beeuilful
'" i eoioe, enmie recitation, ana inning m. I
xllca.
sr.v" VICTOR
Talking Machine
Yon will tiftr the worth of what you pT
H'l tn-raum In pl4rt7 ftii'1 t(fr.
ln. nh r iNlkinn nifch.M i t,t ! 1 1 m n t h
li'tor, l ii t Ihtjir in no erotmni t tn th , r -1 -
ni iuh. r iim tin y do not giv rml Kit
Him. 1 h Vioinf i not m ri a ikUiiii ni
rMn, 1 1 la ft niutrf.l l nair Jintjo t ol in l.lail r.t
rtrr. 11 iiMti mil mi ii tprivlur th
hum-i Ttil r fttif tif ,ny 1ntrumnt r
r:iy w tliom th rrtM'hln7. iTfttrhinr
rtitlni linlitM ft.wftra prni ftlta "ohv"
Ulel4'lni.MI.
H atSveAlMtoty fiw Wtarft m torn in pekm
$in.$l7t1 $12. lawter m. from
$4 0 ! $100. faay frmwl mr
mrt N .ri.
THf HOVt Of QUAIITV
SHERMAN, CLAY & GO.
Slath and Morriaon Sta.,
ope. the Poatoffka
PORTLAND,
ORfGOM
.. U.
ft ai-er
II eeeatloa tkle awatae.
artleere ale
"Tbe color of a book' corer belpa to
aell It," aakl a publleuer. -If tbe row
of Doolt atauu ou a cuuuirr, tiv.
elaltur mill eiamtue firat tbe volume
wltu the tronet, briguttiat blntllnf
that I to Bay, tbe volume bound In red.
After red a food, clear uale of green
I tbe uioat catcbr color. Tben come
blue, tben g rer."
Totna Dlion. Jr wbo I famoue a
tbe author of Tbe Claueman,'' made
bl rbark aa a lei tu rer and clergyuuin
before taking to novel writing. He
born Jaa, 11, 1S04. In Shelby. N. C,
eon of Tboma Dixon, Baptlat preaober.
Ia 1&S3 be graduated from Wake Kor
ea t college, and In ISSt! from Cr-n-boro
law acbool, being admitted to tbe
bar of tbe a late and federal court In
tbe aatne year, lie alao entered tbe
Iiaitlat njlnlatry In tbe aaine year,
holding pulpit In IUleleh, N. C, lla
ton. Mae., and New York City. From
1S.SU to 11M3 be lectured. In 1002 be
publlabed hi first novel, "The Leop
ard' Ftiota." He I a Democrat In
politic.
Tbe author of "The Blue and the
Gray" for ao be will be known
long a the American Union lutislat
nd remember It one dlaruptlve war
died a few day ago at Ithaca, N. V
having paased hi eightieth annlver-
aary June 0. He waa t rancl Mile
I' Inch, an excellent acbolar, lawyer
and Judge, but none of hi eerv
Ire In tlieae capacltle preserve bl
name nothing but writing a certain
wouderful poem at the very moment
ben It needed to be written. Of
course the man who wrote thut muat
have wrltteu much more verse, and
not a little of It should be worthy of
preservation. He was graduated from
Yale In the class of 141). The story
of the writing of The Blue and the
Gray" Is of Interest In the spring of
1S07 It was related that the women of
Columbus, Miss., on Memorial Day,
strewed flower alike on the grave of
tbe Confederate and Federal soldier.
Coming a tender recognition of the
bond, elder than the war of eecesxloa.
It touched the heart of the North, and
Judge Hnch wrote hi poem, which
na grown into greater vogue In tbe
Northern than In the Southern State,
When Gilbert and Sullivan parted
company, all their lovers had cause to
regret It deeply. Tbe reason wby they
separated has not heretofore been
known officially. On July 2 W. 8. Gil
bert wrote to the Dublin Evening Her.
aid to correct various errors regarding
himself contained In an article which
appeared In that Journal. He denied
that he had prosecuted an organ
grinder for annoyance, and then ap
plied for permission to appear a hi
counael. He denied thnt he had ever
loken rudely to a member of hi com
pany. A for hi collaborator, "the
'separation wa not between 'Gilbert
and Sullivan,' but between myself and
ivoyley Carte. It arose from a ques
tion whether a sura of fl.floo for re
furnishing tbe front of tbe Savoy
Theatre wa properly Included In the
preliminary expense of the production
of The Gondolier. I had no ouarrel
with Sir A. Sullivan, though a cool
ness existed between us for a time In
consequence of bis declining to Inter-
rere in the difference between Mr.
Carte and myself. This coolness lasted
a very hort time, and wa quickly
done away with by mutual expres
Lifetime Oaeat of Edlaoa.
John Thomas, the man who tmiffhr
Thomas A. F.dlaon the rilllilllAntaa .ve
telegraphy, la going to accept an In
vitation the Inventor extended to him
to come to Orange. N. Y., and be a life
time guest at the Kdlson home, say the
New York Evening World.
Thorns live In Detroit, Mich. He
met young Edison when the latter wa
a loyear-oltl new butcher on railroad
train. Thomas wa a telegraph op
erator at Fort Gratiot, and the news
boy often dr.iptied In to see him. The
operator w 1ft. That wa In ISfll.
Telling of Kdlaon'a Introduction to
electricity. Thomas .aid, according to a
Detroit dispatch:
"I asked him one day If he wouldn't
like to be an oM-rator. He was Intent
ly watching me while I wn taking a
meesnge. Ho said he might like It; In
fact, be thought It was Just the thing
for hltn.
"Well, I got him a Job. and there
you are. I guesa tbe world ought to
be glad be droped In to see m thnt
day."
Thorns say the Inventor ha al
ways been his friend and hi given him
a sure-enough. Invitation to come and
Jive with him.
"Just as anon as I can settle np ruy
affairs." he declared, "I mean to move
Into the Edison household."
The old oierator went on to explain
that the Inventor's name should not he
pronounced not Edison, but E-dlaon
'Itut I call him AI." be said, "and he
calls me Johnnny."
Haw Ha I. oat III, Teeifc.
James Dally of Jeffcrsonvllle, tn(l
mourning the .ma of several teeth and
Is living on liquid food temporarily at
the result of the antic of a curtain
ttntlw baa r.n. .
tlms used bis teeth to saelat him.
cuiih.u n.urr spring Decani dlsar
ranged, and Dally derided to fx iV
Placing tbe spring end of the roller
his mouth. Dally twisted the other end.
Suddenly there wa a whining of mi,
chlnery Ilk an alarm clock going off
and Dally Imagined his bead was Sylng
to pieces. The spring had been wrmr,J
ao tight It would aot stand the prese-jra
and reversed Its motion, tearing some
of Daily's teeth out and Injurln. other.
rtefc that Drees TaesaeelTee.
There ars several fish In the sea th.
clotha and adorn tbeinaelyes. f)B t
these 1 tha antennarln of ths Indian
Sea, which covers Itself with sea weed
fastened together with glutlnou,
strings, and holds these garments en
wlta Ita foreflns. Horn Not,
iivxd by HAiranro HMsstr.
R ar.abl. Ca-e ! rree.a.
W.a Waa Taa.le (a Uaetere.
There died rei-ently In I'srls a man
who made bis living by banging him
self. "I.- lVuder" be wa generally
called, though bis real nam was Sim
eon Alguler, and he wa born In 1SSI.
When a young man be surprised and
pursled the army doctors. As be Ire-
sented huueclf for physical exsmlna
... . .ii.hi
tlon be spiearel as a iuiu, i'i i--
fellow, almost a skeleton, and before
the examination wo over be tood In
the presence of the army doctor with
an enormously Inflated body, as If be
bad drosy. While the physician wa
exanrlnlng thl abnormsl develojanent
It retreated, and a big, bloated tumor
suddenly grew on the young man's
thrust, as If be bad an Immeuae goitre.
He bad, apiwreutly, In an Instant
transferred the swelling from the low
er part of his body to his throat When
the examination was over he stood
there, a skeleton like young fellow a
before.
HI gifts In bodily transformation
Mm became known all over bla native
district and he was Induced to show
himself on the music hall stsge. For a
tnn. !.. h we vyiv') as the skele
ton man, though ho also exhibited him
self as the fat man. His physical
Hons did not stop here. H
was able to Imitate the process of dy.
Ing sud death Itself to perfection. Sci
entists snd the member of various
medical faculties often wished to M
amine bis strange faculties, but be con.
stantly refused to divulge the secret of
bis transformations. When he Imitat
ed the state of a dead ierson he threw
himself Into a perfect coma. His heart
apparently ceased to beat, and Uie most
expert physicians are said to have
been unable to detect the slightest
movement of bis pulse. They went so
fsr as to apply various Instruments to
detect life without success, and even
through the stethoscope not the slight
est action of the heart could be per
ceived. Tbe most expert doctors would
have declared him dead, and yet in the
next Instant be would Jump up and
crack Joke and be as much alive as
anyone.
His last trick, and one which kept
audiences spellbound, was when ha
used to ban; himself by the neck with
cord. There was no mere make-be
lieve about It. He would bang himself.
or allow himself to be banged, from a
nail In the celling In the presence of
large audience. The rope would fas
ten around his throat, his muscles
would stiffen, and tho frlgiitened public
would see him go through every one of
tbe phases of a man who wa actually
banged. The ghastly spectacle was first
exhibited In a cabaret In Montmartre,
and despite Its horrors, or, rather, on
account of them. It had a great suc
cess. A story Is told that be once
played the trick In a hotel where be
was stopping. He hung himself from
the celling after ringing the bell, and
when the writer entered be was horri
fied by the sight and rushed down to
Inform the proprietor. Before they re
turned to tbe room the man who was
supposed to have nnnged himself had
taken np his valise and met them Quiet
ly on the stairs. Although It might
have been expected that some day be
would hang himself In real earnest,
such a calamity never befell him.
He died of a most commonplace Ill
ness, the grip, at bis home near Tou
lon, where he had retired, after earn
ing a considerable fortune on the stage.
He never divulged the secret of how he
produtd the extraordinary rigidity of
the muscles of bis neck when he used
to perform bis feats of . hanging, and
carried the mystery with him to his
grave. Doctors proposed to perform an
autopsy on his body to discover his se
cret, but bis family refused to allow It
I.emon Julee for Laeehea,
"Wherever you go. In CVylon," said
the snllor, "you always curry a lemon
with you. For punch? No, lr, not for
punch. For leeches.
"Tbcy alu't merely water leeches In
Ceylon ; they're land leeches, too.
These bloodsuckers hang Into the bushes
and trees and they lurk In tbe grass,
waltln' for you. Tbe average size be
fore dinner Is only half an Inch long
and no thicker than a hair you might
say Invisible. They easy work their
way through the thread of your stock
ings and underwear. After dinner they
are as fat as your finger.
The only way to get them off with
out break In' them and leavlu' their
huads Inside you Is to squrvze a few
droii of lemon on them, the same as If
they was raw oysters. That paralyses
them, and they fall to the ground Ilk
ripe fruit Every two or three minutes
you see the Ceylonese stop, take out a
lemon, and anoint carefully the half
dozen leeches stuck In a black mass to
tlie calf of the leg.
The average Ceylon leeches was, I
said, hit If an Inch long. Yet there's
some full three Inches long that can
Jump, by ertnus, that Jump on you
from the bushes as you pass by.
"Sounds doohtous, don't It T But
what can be duoblous la a land where
they have bird catchla' iplders aud
ceutlpodes a foot long?"
Nto Marder on Tarklah Slaare.
On one point the Turkish censor of
the drama is Inflexible there shall be
no murder committed on tlie stage. This
la In order to prevent corruption by
evil example. The dramatic e(Tct of
many play I somewhat marred by
the manner in which tbe frlnclpals
detlned to he murdered are rushed off
the stage and after receiving the fatal
thrust out of sight of the audience stag
ger back from the wing to slug their
death song.
la Hla Mae.
"He Insists that people should pay
their debts."
"Yea, and he make 'em do It, too."
"Why. he' not a lawyer?"
"I know, he' a doctor; and he help
thera pay the debt of nature." lions
ton Post
Tee Reealt at Taeai,
Raid He I suppoa. yon hr had
ample tlms to think over ths proposal
I mad you a week ago?
Said She Yes, aAd the mora I
Uecught of It ths less I thovghi of a.
WHAT IS PE-RU-NA?
Is It a Catarrh Remedy, cr a
Tonic, or Is it Goth?
Soma people call Percn freat
tonic. Other refer to Ftrnna as
great catarrh remedy.
Which of these people are right!
is ii mora, proper to call Frnn a sav
tarrh remedy than to call it a tonic I
Our reply ia, that Ferona i both a
tonlo and a catarrh remedy. Indeed,
there can be no effectual catarrh rem'
edy that la not also a tonic.
In order to thoroughly reliert any
caie of catarrh, a remedy muit not
oaiy nave a ipeciflo action on ue mu
cous membranes affected by the ca
tarrh, bat it mast have a general tonio
action on the nervous system.
Catarrh, even In nenons who are
otherwise strong, jj ae&kened con
dition of some mneorn membrane.
There most be something to strength
en the circulation, to rive tone to the
arteries, and to raise the vital forces,
Perhaps no vegetable remedy in the
wona nas attracted so much attention
from medical writers as HTDSASTI3
CANADENSIS. The wonderful effi
cacy of this herb has been recognized
many years, and is growing in its hold
npon the medical profession, When
joined wiin luj33 and COrAXBA a
trio of medical agents iji formed in ?e-
run wiuca constitute specino rem
edy for catarrh that u the present
state of medical progress cannot be
lmprorea upon. This action, rein
forced by such renowned tonics as
COLLIHSONIA CANAJJEBSia COB.
YDALIS F02M0SA and CE2S0H
SEZD, ought to make this compound
an ideal remedy for catarrh in all its
stages and locations in ths body.
From a theoretical standpoint. there
fore, Pei-ona Is beyond criticism. The
nse or rernna, confirms this opinion.
Numberless testimonials from every
quarter of the earth famish ample
evidence that this judgment is not
over enthusiastic. When practical ex
perience confirms a well-grounded the
ory uie result is a truth that cannot bo
ihaxeo.
Sa Slasalar.
Tunny," said Baretop, Trot there
ws a time when the barbers used to
speak of my hair."
"You mean before yon eegaa to get
bald?" aaked hi friend.
"Tea. Now they spetk f 1"
Philadelphia Pre..
Howt Tha?
We offer One Hundred rirlhri Reward frvr a
eaae of Catarrh tha caaiiei M cured bj Ha.l'e
Catarrh Cure.
F. J. CHIMTa CO., Toledo, O
We. the undeniiinti.i am known r J
Cbenev It the laat 16 Ti-ert. ind believe htm
perfectly honorab.a lnaiktiuaeettranaecUnns
anl financially able to pnj eul any cbllaa-
od made bv bl, flrra. I
WALDINit, Kfr. A 1I1RVIV,
Whnlenfc Fnntlitu, Toleilo.O
Hall'i Caiarrah Cure a ai Internal! art.
In illpvily upon tha bA.iui.1 mucous inr-
on ni tne intem. l'wilal aent free.
Price 7ft centa per bottl- In hy all lwueelets.
Take Uall'a Family tm IrCouatlpatioo.
"Do you think J railway will be
willing to obey thiwr
"Oh, yes," aiwred Mr. Dtnrtln
Stax; "we'll 0I7 the law all right
But not until ifter our lawyer get
through explaulm It." Washington
Star.
Waal laved lllaa.
niobbs dwelt tint fcor to Mr. ITaod,
Whoae repmatls. wasn't good ;
And ao, one
Blohhs tiered twiy
lie d.d aot like tW neishbor Hood.
Artlattcallr I peak I a.
Mrs. Kawler (logins; at photograph)
It's an excellent jwnr of you. but It's
aa exceedingly poor tat of your husband.
Mrs. Crosaway lbow It. but I like
It all the better 0 that account, lis
makes such as adanble er foil, you
know.
, Tk. ui.
"There no aa Hiking," said Mrs.
Hewligue. "My kmtud la tea crankieat
man that aver drew tha breath of life.
There la only on tint in th year when
be feel like going u church, and that's
when the church ia e!id for tb summer
vacation.
Kaaaee Ira.
Btobo I am gl4 to say that th
foolish old costno. 4 f jhtinf at th
drop of a hat ha coj,pktely died out
l'eiiD I don't belters it I dropped
my wife's white sunder hat while I
"wm looking for my collar yesterday
Snid she ha beenjtin, over sine-.
Robbea e faith.
niox Shyster 1 triiently a student
of human nature.
Knox-Why do think ao?
Rlox n ha no frith In mankted.
Knox Ob, that's Ml7 explained.
he aawoctsted witd himself for a
good many years,
-a He Ten. It.
Jut aa Mr. and Mn, Ferguaoa were
getting off the street cf tt the crowded
corner downtown. Mr. Ftrgueoa hit a
hand elyly iaierted la hl pocket.
But be did aot rtira it. t,nt.
Me recomled his w.h'a delire touch.
Is Your
Hair Sick?
Thit's too bad ! h.d no
ticed it wu looking pretty
thin and faded of late, but
naturally did not like to speak
of It. By the .,y, Ayer's
H.Ir Vigor is regu!ar half
grower, a perfect hair re
storer. It keepi the ictlp
ciean and healthy.
I I alee .,;. ml I
I XI tfi sse4Atuiu. I
lrLfUUaT'Js' "l" "
Dot (meeting Johnny) I have found
m Jf.tnny What em IT IJOl
Nobody. Jobnny Ooodneaa fraoloiis,
I am discovered I
ra Why did you go out In tbe rain
today without ao umbrella. John 7
Johnny I ate salt mackerel thla morn
Ing for breakfast, and that keel me
dry.
Johnny Say, dad, If I a to a chop
and you ordered one and ate It, what
would your chon number be? Pa
Otve It up. son, Johnny It would be
1 Z
JJttlo Edna What la "leisure,1
Biannual Mamma It' the spar time
a woman has lu which she con do some
other kind of work, my dear. Chicago
Dally News.
lie ( sententtously ) I always speak
my mind. Eh (tartly) 1 suppose
that is wny you uave lue repuiauou ui
being a man of so few words. Baltl
more American.
Mother Whatever are you doing to
poor dolly, child? Child I'm Just go
ing to put her to bed, mummy. I've
taken off her hair, but I can't get her
teeth out tiourlra.
Old Lady (improving th occasion)
Tou know, boys, It's only the body
which Ilea here. Now, what Is it goes
to Heaven J Small Boy (tentatively)
'Is 'ead, mum. I'lck-Me-L'p.
Nell Tea, ahe said her husband mar
ried her for ber beauty. What do you
think of that? Belle Well, I think her
husband must feel like a widower now.
Catholic Standard and Time.
Mistress Bridget, have you cement
d the handle on to tbe water-Jug
which yeu dropped yesterday? Bridget
I started to, Mum, but most unfor
tunately I dropped the cement bottle.
Vunch.
"The body ot the late Major Jinks
waa cremated." "What they goln to
do wlth ltr "Ills widow has hlin
corked up In a fruit Jar. Says It's the
last of tha family Jars." Atlanta Con
stitution.
The Wife, during a quarrel I'm c
mg right home to mother; so there I
Tho Husband That's right dear, of
two evtla alway choose the lea. I'lease
don't bring your mother here. You-
kers Statesman.
Pa You naughty boy, you've been
fighting again 1 Johnny-r-No, pa, I was
only trying to keep a bad boy from
hurting a little boy. Fa That waa a
noble act my sou; who wa the little
boy? Johnny Me,
Department Store Manager Th
clerk In the butter department says he's
not going to lie about our butter any
more. Tbe Boss What salary ooes ne
get? Manager Eight dollars a week.
Tbe Boas Olve him nine.
Sweet ' Singer D Hammer Bays be
has a high place In tbe next show he
goes out with, comedian well. I
should say It is high. He sits In the
flies and tears up paper for the snow
storm scene. Chicago News.
Dot I heard your soldier brother
wrote you a birthday letter. Waa tuere
any war news In It? Johnny I don't
know. Tou see It was printed on tbe
envelope "Return In Ave daya." So I
kept It that long and then sent It back.
Walter Girl (in restaurant) We've
got frogs' legs, chicken livers, caivos'
brains and Johnny (turning to bl
pa) I say, dad, they muat be queer
people who live In this place. Don't
you think they ought to call In a doc
tor?
"Ia Mrs. Wise at homer Inquired
Mrs. Chatters, standing In the shadow
of the doorway. "I dou't know, ma'am,"
replied the servant "I can't tell till I
rit a better look at ye. If ye've a wart
nn tha aide o rer nose, nia'ain, she
ain't" Philadelphia Trees.
"Thar, my son, you see what larnln'
done fer yer daddy, don't you?" "What
roawT "Why, Jest as soon as the gov
ermlnt knowed that he could do flg-r
In his head they p'lnted him poatniaater
at $00 a year, an purty soon hell be
sellln' tarops What goes on letters I"
Atlanta Constitution.
"But" asked the proprietor of the
Botigtong apartment, "do you think
this man Is the best one you can get for
Janitor?" "The best ever!" replied the
manager. "He has been at various
times an Iceman and a street-car con
ductor. He's as sassy and Independent
aa be can be." Philadelphia Press.
"What I would like," said the eager
Toon- actress, "is a part with a death
scene In It I never isn 10 mam ui
hit when I die." "I don't aouDt iv
replied the heartless manager, "aud I
ma aav that you would make tbe big-
eat hit of your life If you would go
away somewhere and die right now."
Chicago Record Herald.
Johnny (sitting up In bis bed at
12:80 p. m.) Uad. I'm so thirsty. Pa
Lie quietly ana go w Sleep, jonnny
rafter a nause) But dad. I must have
- Mnt of water. I'm so tnirsty. fa
a v.- " - - . , .. 1
If you don't go to Sleep mi minute 1 11
have to thrash you. A long silence,
then Johnny replied All right dad. If
you're getting up to thraah me, you
might bring me a glaae of water at the
same time.
He ta Staler Whlet.
-Tinm can one learn to enjoy the
game of whlatr Aspirant
Get yourseir ropea into a game n
partner to ome one who helped Hoyle
write hie book. The other two players
must also be experts. Start In pleas
antly to enliven the game with a few
well-chosen anecdotes, now and then
waking the wrong play. After your
partner be slapped your ear and
worn at you and put the black Corse
on you and all your ancestry and called
yon a fool a few times you will awake
to the real Joy of the gentle and Intel
tactual game. We have tried thla sev
eral times, but not at frequent Inter
rale, and we can guarantee Ita etncacyi
Chicago News.
Often a man Impoaea on Lumeel
when he taxes his memory.
IBAB .BLOOD
THE SOURCE OF ALL DISEASE
Every rati of the body is dependent on the blood for nourishment nni
Stretifc-th. when this hie stream 13 Uowing through tbe system in a state of
purity and richness we are asaureu ci jxrieca sua nniniemipiea ucaim;
because pure blood is nature's sale-.Tiam asainst disease. When, bowcer.
the body is fed on weak, impure or polluted blood, the system is deprived of
its strength, disease genus collect, and the trouble is manifested in various
mvi. Pustular emotions, pimples, rashes and the different Skin affections
how that the blood is in a feverish and diseased conaulon as a result of too
much acid or the presence of some irritatinr humor, gores and Ulcers are
the result of morbid, unhealthy matter ia the blood, and Rheumatism, Ca
tarrh, Scrofula, Contagious Xlood Poison, etc., are all deep-seated blood
disorders that will continue to grow worse as Ion if as the poison remains.
These impurities and poisons find their way into the blood in various ways.
Often a alurgish. inactive condition of the system, and torpid state of tha
venues of bodily watte, leaves the refuse and waste matters to sour ami
form uric and other acids, which are taken up by the blood and distributed
throughout the circulation. Coming in contact with contagious diseases is)
another cause for the poisoning of the blood : we also breathe the rerms and
microbes of Malaria inte our lungs, and when these get into the blood ia
Sufficient quantity it become a carrier of disease instead of health. Soma
are so unfortunate as to inherit bad blood, peruana the dree-s of some old
constitutional disease of ancestors is handed down to them and they are
constantly annoyed and troubled with it. Bad blood is the source of all dis
ease, and until this vital fluid is cleansed and purified the body is sure to
suffer in some way. For blood troubles of anv character 8. S. S. is tha best
remedy ever discovered. It goes down into the circulation and removes any
and all poisons, supplies the healthful properties it needs, and completely
ana permanently cures Mood diseases of
every kind. The action of 8. S. S. is so
thorough that hereditary taints are removed
and weak, diseased blood made strong and
stealthy so that disease cannot remain. It
cures Rheumatism, Catarrh, Scrofula, Sores
and Ulcers, Skin Diseases, Contagious)
Wood Poison, etc.. and does not leave the
slightest trace of the trouble for future outbreaks. The whole volume ot
blood is renewed and cleansed after a course of S. S. S. It is also nature'
greatest tonic, made entirely of roots, herbs and barks, and is absolutely
harmless to any part of the system. S. S. 8. is for sale at all first class)
fjfcrug stores. Hook on the blood and any medical advice free to all who write
THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO., ATLANTA GAm
PURELY VEGETABLE
Oar Sea Mlastrels.
Mlatak Jlnkloa, wby aa a acoldlo'
woman' tongue, when It' goia' all d
timer
I are not ure, George, that I under
stand yea. 'Why I a scolding woman'a
tongue, whea It' going all tb time'
what I th reat George?"
Ain't n rest to It. Got rsnrbt off ve'
base dat time, didn't yo', Mietab Jin-klsar
"Ladles and gentlemen, th eminent
tesor, M'aiea Tellk Phewry, will now
sing tbe favorite sentiment ballad, 'An
swer M the Old, Old Question, Lore;
Hew l Too Eat a Soft Shell Crab? '
IRRIGATED LAND IN WASHINGTON
The Wenatchee Valley Irrigated Ap
ple Orchards sre paying $"00 to floOO
per aore this yea'. Cascade Orchard,
one mile from Leavenworth, is now on
rale. Get particular free irom
II. C. Peter, 622 Alaaka Bl.lg., Seattle
ENGRAVING Write Us
PLATES
rOR PRINTING
HICKS-CHATTEN
Portland Oregon
V iid near aea an xicrrnea iiene i
permaneallr curedhr vr. Mliae'e urra
Reeterer. Heed er rKf aiiinw eoiua ana
e. tf. M. KL .uam, 14L, ami Aies at rua.,ra.
Goes I'a,
Bacon ITas be been successful with
his new airship?
Egbert rartially so. He goes "up
la tbe air" every time be tries to start
the thing. lookers Statesman.
CASTOR I A
Tor Infants and Children.
Ths Kind You Have Always Bought
Bears the . m
Signature of JiSZ7&JcZt
laearaala.
The professor waa welcoming a niece.
bo had juat returned from a trip abroad.
Had a fin time, had your he aikcd.
"Perfectly spleadld.
"Yet you wer going around between
abowera all th time.'
Why, how ran yon talk sot It didn't
rain a drop while I "
Don't Interrupt me, child. I knew
what I am aaylng. It waa raining whea
yeu started away from her and it'a rain
ing bow. Comprehend?"
20 Mule Team
BORAX
will eleanee evary article In roiir kltcbea or italns
room make them briht-Bn4 tiir alKer or (.ttf
giva a aiah MMi.n. Aiiaemitmi. ntnM.. tHMm uit
P rlnrllame "WHIZ" kn. faalOa Oaeat Sara Oe.,
OeklaaoM'el
a
AeeordlaaT Ralee.
Sentry You can't leave.
Soldier Itut I have tb captain's
oral permission.
Sentry (Importantly) Let' see It-
Translated for Tranaallantlc Tales
from II Motto per Rldere.
Mother win And Mr. Wlne1oire SnAtMns
Syrup tbe b at remedy In uae tu tbelr calldraa
iurlug the UeUilus period.
Kasllea aaat Freaoa llaiaaali.
Wben an Eiiglieh wife baa hysterics
her huaband I Immediately bored and
goe to his club or els he says: "You
are not very well, my dear. Shall I
send for a doctor?" The Frenchman,
au contralre, lias hysterics, too. Th
Frenchman may fight with hla wife,
love ber, hate her, klse her or kill her,
but Indifferent to her, superior to her,
never! Pol Oe I,eon In Ixindon World.
L
STJACOBS OIL
CONQUERS
, PAIN
DRUGGISTS 6O0,
ron rnFfNESS, soreniss, sprain on bruise,
NOTHING IS BETTPe. THAT YOU CANAJ8E
tUMBAOO'S PAIN, RHEUMATIC TWINGE,
VOUR SACK FEELS LIKE A RUSTY HINGE
SCIATIC ACHES ALL PLEASURES SPOIL,'
FOR HAPPINESS US ST. JACOBS OIL.
MILITARY
ACADEMY
A hoarding and day iehnnl for Tonne men and toye. A erred! tad to
aianfnrd, RHrkrlry, ( ornell, A rnhf-rat and all Mete unlveraiuea end
aerlrultuial rnllrf. The prllirlpel baa had J yeam' eirinee In
(inland. Make ri-aervatloua now. l or llluatraied catalogue and
otlef literature addreaa
J. W. HILL, M. D Principal mi Proprie'or, PORTLAND, ORECOX
jZ Thl pick 1
ALUS' LIWI3
Fresh from the Ear to the Can in Maine
Preferred Stork Sweet Com U packed fur ui tliere became
t!i Main toil and climate combine to produce the weeteit.
tenderest, nioit dehcioui corn in the
irMi canned riuht in this wonderful corn
ten fathered and packed the nme day, with
rrupnesi and aweemeia perfectly preierved.
the aecret of "iweet corn goodne,, in
Preferred Stock Canned Goods
racket Wleroef tka But an Srewa
rlht trof PREFERRED STOCK atjourGrvttr'l
Weoieeale Orooera, POITLAffD, OBBOOS. 0. S. A.
, 5 y-r
a...., '-11
W. L. DOUGLAS
$3.00 & $3.50 SHOES
THE VoRLO
ia-SHOES FOR IVf RY MEMStR OF W
W THI raeHLY, AT ALL ICF.
$25,000
Row or a
TH It REAROM W. t.. Doulaa .hoee are worn hv mote people
ta all walk, oflife than anjr oilier make bei-euae of taeir
etiwlleM Mvle. eaev-Atiinf. and .uoari.ie w.ana qiialiliee.
Iheaaleeeiea eftheleetberii and other eiaierlala for eann par
af Se .hoe and eeerr detail of the aiaaiaai alooaed ater bv
the moat eoai pleia artentiatina of apenn )enda ta . f oieeiea and
eailWdanoeaeaer.. who raeeire the biheet wae paid i a the
Siioei adierv. and who workanen.hu cannot ta aeealled.
1 f I eaqld take row ate my I area ( aetooae at Froekloe "aa. .
sad .how m how carefully W. L. lou.le ahnee are made. yo
araiadtaea aadefvtaad why thev hold their .hana. St better.
ul m
1 fa ava arna Ban ewra e. a.
I Daataea etaaa nef maa M eaAT
I hSaMi-'tfeer ataaavaofeeee.
w
Ten.nr.'j aad are of fwetee vy.ie rnan i ear oiner maaa.
SW 94.00 area BB.ua miL I lustineea eaiaii a-a? eaa.e.e mr mmy vres.
CAUIIOhl Taesanuine ha.a W. L. Uuuaiae aame ead inaa atefDd oa hottam. lake
Ha aaaetltate. Aak ywur dealer fee W. L. Lotlae ahaae. If he Mt .iptly yoa. aea4
aet tetaetaty. iieai mat .raryeaare . aiailLanaa, tree, w, L. Daaglaa, Kreaktaa, Una,