GEO. G. PATERSON
Furniture and Pianos
I carry a full line of Modem and Up-to-Date
Furniture, Chairs, New Line of Rugs, In
grains and Linoleums.
THE VERY BEST
$25.00 SEWING MACHINE * THt ^
PAINTS, W ALL PAPER, OILS
In Fact
Everything Necessary to Furnish a Home
STEEL
RANGES
I have a few Steel Ranges which I am closing out at a
big discount. Have not got the room ~io keep them.
HAMMOCKS AT COST
All Hammocks to be Sold At Cost. Let me prove it to you
GEO. G. PATERSON
FURNITLRE AND PIANOS
FOREST GROVE,
“ Tommy,” the schoolma’am
asked, “ why are you scratching
your head ?” “ ’Cause nobody
else knows just where it itches. "
0 :0
THE QUESTION
Said old farmer Jenkins to his
wife as she sat by the fire knit
ting:
“ When an old hen broods on a
nest of eggs, is that hen setting
or sitting ?”
“ Well, I don’t know as to
that,” she replied, “ but this
puzzle to solve I am trying.
“ When a hen cackles to beat
the band,
“Is that hen laying or lying?”
o : o
On being asked what his cat’s
name was. a little boy replied:
“I used to call him Tom, but I
changed it to Nellie, so he’d have
« k
OREGON
what an appendix was, and so
informed the physician, who
laughingly told him that after
the operation he would leave the
appendix in the window so he
could see it when he was able to
sit up.
Some days after the operation
Pat’s curiosity got the better of
him, and he raised up in bed to
take a look at his appendix. To
his amazement a monkey was
sitting on the windowsill, and
! when he saw Pat he began to
! make faces and chatter at a
I great rate.
The astonished Irishman gave
the monkey a long, hard look,
and then exclaimed: “ Don’t do
that, me boy, don’t do that.
Can’t you see your mother is a
\ very sick man ?”
item to his paper, put it in this
o : o
wise: “ We are sorry to report
BOTH SATISFIED
that Mr. John Larson, one of the
prominent farmers of this vicin The drug clerk wrapped the
ity. is sick in bed with a trained bottle of cough medicine careful
nurse.”
ly in a neat white paper scented
with tooth powder, and tied the
o : o
package up with a pink string.
E benezer : “ Rastus, for why
“Seventy-five cents,” he said,
you all call that ol’ mule ob yo’s setting it on the counter.
Napoleon ?”
The old man laid down a nickel
R astus : “ I calls him Napol slipped the bottle into his pocket
eon on account of his Bon(y)- and opened the door.
parte.”
"That’s seventy-five cents,”
said the clerk, raising his voice.
o : o
“ Well, I’ve paid ye,” grunted
HE DIDN’T UNDERSTAND
the old man.
“There's your
Pat had been seized with vio five!”
lent pains and was hurried to a
“Seventy-five,” shouted the
hospital.
The physician in clerk, seeing the old party about
charge, after diagnosis, informed to escape.
him that he had appendicitis, and
“ I give ye five,” yelled back
that an operation was necessary, the old man, as he made a dash
as his appendix must be removed for the once-an-hour Bingville
immediately.
electric and boarded it.
Pat had not the least idea I “Oh, well," sighed the clerk,
Into The Heart of Portland
Oregon Electric trains now run through the retail, hotel
and theatre center of Portland to the North Bank Station,
11th and Hoyt streets, stopping inbound at all street inter
sections. Outbound trains stop at 10th and Stark, 10th
ane Morrison, 5th and Salmon, 1st and Salmon streets, as
well as The North Bank and Jefferson street stations.
These city stops are convenient and time saving for Willam
ette Valley passengers.
Through Tickets East
No Portland Transfers
Tickets are sold and baggage checked through to Eastern
points. Fares, train service and other details will be
furnished on request.
w . E. COMAN,
G. F. & P. A.,
Portland, Ore
N. L. A T K 1N 3,
Agent,
Forest Grove, Ore.
whistle, anc a penny fires a shot;
and when you don’t drop in any
thing the box takes your pic
ture.” “No, thanks.” said the
Pastor earnestly, “ 1 won’t take
it; I already have pictures of my
W a t t s I te m s
entire congregation.” The bov
The school board and a few who picked up this almost worn
other patrons of the school met out scrap, managed to read it all,
Monday to clean the new building and after making the remark of
and grounds. The men hauled what sound a nickle with a hole
gravel and sawdust, filled in the in it might make, proceeded to
yard and put in wood and kind name every one in the Verboort
ling, while the women cleaned Parish that with such a collec-
windows, etc., and spread a dan tion box going the rounds would
dy lunch at noon, of which all have their pictures taken on Sun-
felt in need after the strenuous i days.
work of the morning.
Word has been received from
The grape crop is being har Albert Ruetten, that he landed
vested. but is proving very light. in Baltimore on the 10th, and
One man spent a half day, with that P. J. Hevaert left on the
no assistance, in doing the work White Star Line from New York
that in other years required a for Antwerp on the 14th. It
week or more, with help.
I will do no harm to the State of
The rooms at the new school Oregon that now and then some
house will be full if all pupils are ot its old and time-honored resi
• present, more seats being need dents leave for other parts of
the world, it is then that they
ed already in the first room.
We hope you will come to Sun- realize the glory and health of
| day School next Sunday.
We the Oregon climate, and give
substantial and well deser/ed
I want you and we need you.
The new first room teacher, praise of it.
j Miss Ethel Smith, is rooming at
For some years past the school
■ present with some high school children of the Centerville Dis
; girls near the brick yard.
A trict haxe been in the habit of
! good long walk it will be when giving Verboort the appellation
the rains begin.
of “Dutch Kingdom.” Quite re
Mr. Burk has a fine crop of cently one of the smart boys of
potatoes this fall. They expect that section alluded to another
smart fellow from /Verboort as
about three hundred sacks.
Mrs. Hardman, of Tillamook, Dutch Kingdomer,' whereupon
is visiting her sister, Mrs. A. L. i the Dutchman responded by
singing the original verse; “O
Dilley.
Centerville, O Centerville, Wie
grun
sind deine spoffer.” You
E c h o e s fro m V e rb o o rt.
may draw your own conclusion
F. F. Lahaie and wife re- j as to what was in the mind of
turned last week from an ex the youngster.
tended trip through Canada,
where they spent the summer, j
The Verboortians had quite a
B lo o m in g
time last Sunday in a humorous
Miss Tena Kamna; who spent
way, blaming him for the failure
of reciprocity with our neighbor a part of the summer wit’.i her
Canadians. Mr. Lahaie ex sister at Oak Point, Wash,, re
plained that neither Champ turned home last week.
Clark’s speeches nor the influence
of our President’s efforts had
Otto Kraus was at home Sun
anything to do with the defeat day evening.
in Canada. He gives the Cana- j
A number of the members of
rtians credit for knowing that the
United States will not pass laws the Lutheran church went to
to benefit Canada, or any other | Portland Sunday afternoon.
nation. Canadians simply voted
Adam Hergert, Jr., received a
for what they thought best for
themselves.
carload of dynamite this week.
The roads have never been in
better condition for many years
than they are right now.
The farmers of the settlement
are all busy, either with plowing A fishing party, composed of
John and Herman Behrman, H.
or fixing up their homes.
Every farmer of this settle Liebenow, W. Hammelman and
ment ought to take and read the G. Ruecker, left for the Wilson
Tribune, for it is in this paper river Wednesday.
that all the local happenings ap
pear. The following item was Some of the Blooming people
found last Tuesdey in a remote attended the dance at Farming-
corner of the schoolbuilding by ton. Saturday.
one of the fifth grade pupils, and
judging from the obscurity of Chas. Reese has burned down
the print and the yellowness of his old rail fence preparatory to
the paper, it must have been erecting a woven wire fence. A
from about ten years back; the
item is as follows: ‘This new few of our prosperous farmers
collection box, pleaded the in aught to follow Mr. Reese’s good
ventor, has unique advantages. example.
When you drop in a fift>-cent
piece or more, it doesn’t make a Herman Behrmann and sister,
sound: drop in a dime and it Miss Bertha, visited friends at
tinkles a bell, a nickle blows a Bald Peak last Sunday.
as he opened the cash drawer
and flipped the five-cent piece
into it, “we stand to make two
cents anyhow!”