T o P r o g n o s tic a te S torm s.
R OO SEVELT C U TS L008E.
B i l l i a r d s o n t h e B r a in .
By m e a n s o f a d e lic a te in s tr u m e n t
------------
I Mra. Y o u n g b rld e (sobbing)— I ’m go-
called th e c e ra u n o g ra p h , R ev. F re d e r- Haa T im e o f H i* L ife in R e u n io n w ith !ng hom e to m y m o th e r’s— y o u h a v e
Cow boy«.
d eceiv ed me!
; ick L. O d ersb ac h , p ro fe s so r o f ch em is
tr y In S t I g n a tiu s ’ College, In C leve
B e fo re d in n e r th e P re s id e n t h eld a I M r. Y o u n g b rld e— W h y , w h a t o n
lan d , Ohio, Is ab le to fo retell m any recep tio n , s ta n d in g o u t u n d e r one o f e a r th is th e m a tte r ?
h o u rs th e n u m e ro u s su m m e r sto rm s the b ig tr e e s t h a t lin e th e g ra v e l w alk, I M rs. Y.— W re tc h ! You w e n t to a
w h ich com e up, o ften on b rig h t, w arm , «ays th e S an A n to n io c o rre sp o n d e n t o f d a n c e la s t n ig h t a n d e s c o rte d a y o u n g
c le a r d ay s, w ith s ta rtlin g ra p id ity , an d th e N ew Y ork W orld. T h e rough rid- E n g lish w o m an . O h! I k n o w all!
w ith d ire re s u lts to th e sm all c r a f t ers eam e up o n e by one. T h e f’resl- I M r. Y.— Now will you k in d ly te ll m e
n g th e sea c o a s t a n d
on In lan d ®*n t c a lled m o st of th em by th e ir first w h a t th is all m e a n s?
Don’t have a falling out with a w lo a te
rs .
¡nam e. O cca sio n ally be called a “ BUI" , M rs. Y — You n e e d n 't d e n y It— I
your hair. It might leave you 1
T h e actio n o f th e c e ra u n o g ra p h Is a “J im ” o r th o u g h t " H a n k "
w a s b e a rd you ta lk in g In y o u r sleep w h en
Then what? Better please it sim p le a n d easily u n d e rsto o d by a n y ¡“ T o m ," b u t u su a lly he k n e w th em be- y ou g o t hom e so la te la s t n ig h t. You
p re se n te d to him by e a id : " T h a t b la m e d 'M is s Q. m a d e m e
by giving it a good hair-food— o n e a c q u a in te d w ith a n o rd in a ry tele* ,f L ° ie r u ® te th n a e n y t w F ere
o rte sc u e , w ho stood be- m iss one ball a lto g e th e r. I d o n ’t un-
g ra p h sy ste m w ith re la y . T h e Initial
Ayer’s Hair Vigor. The hair a c tio n p re c e d e s th e a d v e n t o f th e slde him .
d e r s ta n d th e E n g lis h ." Now ca n y o u
stops coming out, becomes sto rm fro m one to th irty -s ix hours. “ H ello, ‘B en!’ ” h e sh o u te d , a t “ B en" d e n y It?— C lev e la n d le a d e r .
an iels sid led up. " I f you h a d n ’t b een |
soft and smooth, and all the A s th e e lectric d is tu rb a n c e a d v a n c e s D
A B o rn D ip lo m a t.
tu e c o h erer Is v ery b usy, soon p ro d u c h e re I n e v e r ’W ould h a v e fo rg iv en I
M rs. G o tro x — So y o u w ish to m a r ry
deep, rich c o lo r of youth
in g a c o n tin u o u s b a n d record, w h ile yo“;
"C olonel,” sa id G eorge M cC abe o f m y d a u g h te r, do y o u ?
comes back to gray hair.
th e d e c o h e re r keep s up a c o n s ta n t
C h a rlie S h o rt— W ith y o u r p e rm is
c la tte r, w h ich finally becom es d e a fe n A rlso n a, “do you re m e m b e r w hen I sion.
“ I w m troubled rreatly w ith dandruff until
stole t h a t m esa o f g reen corn fo r you?*1
I used A yer’s Hair vig o r. It com pletely cured
ing.
the dandruff and also stopped m y hair from
M rs. G o tro x — A nd you a re q u ite s u re
“ Do I re m e m b e r It!" ex ploded th e
fallin g out. It serves m e very nicely also in
arranging m y hair in any sty le I w ish .” —
P re sid e n t, sla p p in g M cC abe on th e >o u *°v e h e r f o r h e rs e lf alo n e?
A Heavy Fine.
M 18 8 M aooib C o o k , D ivide, W. Va.
“ W hy, G eorge, t h a t w a s th e
C h a rlie S h o rt— No.
I —e r — c a n n o t
U n d e r th e E lk in s law , an y ra ilro a d back.
b e st m ess o f g re e n corn I e v e r h a d .”
tr u th f u lly say t h a t I do.
B i a d o b y J . C . A y e r C o ., L o w e ll « M a o s .
com
pany
w
h
ich
pays
re
b
a
te
s
in
an
y
A ls o m a n u f a c tu r e r s o f
*‘I g u e ss you d o n ’t re m e m b e r me, do
M rs. G o tro x — W h a t! Do y o u m ean
form , o r an y sh ip p e r w ho accepts th e m ,
.
f
S A R SA P A R IL L A .
is lia b le to a fine of from »1,000 to S’0" 7" askpd H <*nry B a rd s b a a r, o f P res-
tell m e th a t y o u a r e a fo rtu n e b un
te r?
»20,000, upon c o n v ic tio n . I t also pro- | b a s h f u l l y ,
Ä
PECTO RA L.
n -y . sure!
su re :
ex claim ed th e Presl-1 C h a rlie S h o rt— N ot a t all. You see.
h ib its th e c a a rry in g of fre ig h t a t less I
" ” hy,
th a n th e p u b lish e d ta riffs. T h e In te r- d e n t- " I t , , » e u r y , ‘■n ’« 1 , r
1 w ,ab lo “ " T h e r fo r ,b a a a k * o f
s ta te C om m erce com m ission is em pow - I T h en he tu r,le d to H108« a r o u n d him h a v in g you fo r a m o th er-in -law
as
R e s t l e s s I n fa n t s .
F irs t Baby (to itself)— I wish mamma ered to d e te c t an d p ro secu te v io la to rs a n d aald: “ H e n ry « o le fo r m e. H e m u ch a s a n y th in g else,
P re s id e n t K n a p p of « °'® p ro v isio n s, fro m th e q u a rte rm a s -
a n ’ papa wouldn’t w aks me up a tissiu ’ of th is s ta tu te .
W h y is b re u d like tlie s u n ?
A n s.—
th e com m ission sta te s t h a t since th is te r , u d one n **b t he sto le a poncho
9 each other.
B ec a u se It rise s fro m th e y e a s t.
I>aat Baby (years later)— I wish m am law w as p assed, re b a te p ay in g h a s b een a n d * S p a n ish b la n k e t. S ay, H en ry ,
w * d ld n ’f 8>eep t h a t n ig h t, f o r It r a in
ma a n ’ papa w ouldn't wake me up a as ra re as fo rg ery .
ed, b u t w e 'd h a v e been m uch co ld er I f,
M ISS M A RIA D U C H A R M E .
ja w in ’ a t each other.
w e h a d n ’t h a d th e b la n k e t a n d the
E n g lis h L a w y e rs ' R ob es.
E
v
ery
W om an in A m erica la In te re s te d
|
T h e E n g lish b a r still clin g s d e v o te d p oncho."
in T h is Y oung G i r l ’s E x p erien ce .
S ev eral of th e tro o p e rs h s d been
ly to Its robes. A so lic ito r w b o fo r
som e reaso n w as n o t p re p a re d w ith w a itin g fo r a c h a n c e to (m a k e a re- i
f o r In fanta and Children.
h is p ro fe ssio n a l co stu m e a sk e d p e rm is q u est.
“C olonel,” sa id one, " w e ’v e g ot som e
sion o f a L ondon ju d g e th e o th e r d ay
to a p p e a r w ith o u t It, b u t th e Judge de-
o u r w om en fo lk s h ere. C a n w e pre-
c la re d t h a t he could g iv e no such sane- aan* fb a ,n ?”
Bears the
tlo n . H o w e v e r, to av o id d elay, he re-
P re s e n t th e m ? W ell, I sh o u ld say
Signature o f
so rte d to a fine legal d istin c tio n : “ 1 ; you c a n - 7,rlnK th em up."
do n o t g iv e you p e rm issio n , b u t If th e i " ^ b * ' a d ' e * w e re b ro u g h t f o rw a r d a
¡ o th e r p ro fe ssio n a l g e n tle m e n p re s e n t i o tte r in g , e m b a rra s s e d bu n ch . T h ere
T o o “ B o s s y ."
She— You d o n 't love m e a s you u se d ra ise no o b jectio n I w ill co n sen t to j ! w e re w ives, d a u g h te rs, m o th e rs an d
sw e e th e a rts.
to. B efo re w e w ere m a rrie d you con- h e a r y o u .” H e w a s b e a rd , a n d It m a y
“ L a d le s." sa id th e P re s id e n t, a f te r
sid e re d m e a b so lu te ly p e rfe c t----------’’ ! be tr u s te d t h a t no sa c re d p re c e d e n t
h e h a d ahnken h a n d s w ith all of
H e — Yes, a n d now yo u ’re p e rfe c tly w a s d am ag ed .
them , “you a r e th e only o n es I p u t be
a b s o lu t e .” — P h ila d e lp h ia P r e s s .
fo re m y R ough R ider*.”
T a k e It K a a y .
T h en h e tu r n e d to th e tic k le d m en.
’B out the tim e you get to thinkin* th at
P IT O Perm an en tly Cared. N o a t*or n ervousness
“ B oya,” h e co n tin u ed . *‘I c o n g ra tu
you’re g ittin ’ on a bit.
I I l U after first day's use o f Dr. K llne’sU reat N erve
liestorer. Send for F r e e S 2 trial bottle and treatise.
A n’ you jingle of your money as you la te you on y o u r good ta « te In se lect
Dr. R. H . K line, Ltd., 031 Arch B t , Philadelphia, Pa.
stroll and stru t about.
in g y o u r w lvea a n d o th e r fe m a le r e la
B e tter keep your peepers open, for your tive«. I c e rta in ly am p ro u d o f y o u .”
A s k e d a n d A n s w e re d .
life ain ’t over yet,
M e an w h ile H e n ry B a rd a h a a r had
“ W h at is th e average w eight of w om
A n ’ th ere’s alw ays lots of danger when been s ta n d in g a ro u n d , first on one foot
en ?” asked th e typew riter boarder.
the chest is sw eliin’ out.
an d th e n on th e o th e r. T he P re s id e n t s
“T h e av erag e w ait of wom en,” a n
sw ered the bachelor dentist, “ is until ’B out the tim e you git to lookin' a t your ey e fell on him .
By G od frey , H e n ry ,” h e sa id , a s he
neighbors with su’prise.
they are asked to m arry .”
A n’ a-feelin’ sorry fer ’em c u t you’ve w ru n g th e tro o p e r’s h a n d a g a in , ” 1 am
glad you a r e here. You see,’’ he e x
left ’em in the press.
F o r forty r e a r’s P ls o s Cure for Con
sum p tio n has* cured coughs an d colds. A t T h en ’s the tim e fa te ’s lookin’ fer you plained, “ H e n ry w a s my o rd e rly fo r a
dru g g ists. Price 26 cents.
with a club of m ighty size.
tim e, a n d e v e ry tim e I w aa on th e
A n’ you'll feel the rungs a-breakin* in firing lin e he w a s th e re . E v e ry tim e
T h e s w ifte s t dog ia th e w o rld , th e
the ladder of success.
fITWSS DIARIA DUCHARME,
1 stood up H e n ry stood up, too. H e
'
10? J t E l i x a b e t h J t ,
borzoi, o r R u ss ia n w o lfh o u n d , h a s m a d e — D e tro it T rib u n e ,
seem ed to th in k t h a t If I g o t sh o t it
peal, Can.
re c o rd ru n s th a t show sev en ty -fiv e fe e t
w
a
s
his
d
u
ty
to
g
e
t
shot,
too.
in a second, w h ile th e gazelle h as sh o w n
W h y sh o uld a h o u sek e e p er n e v er p u t
T
h
e
re
w
as
h
a
lf
a
n
h
o
u
r
o
f
th
is
so
rt
PELVIC
CATARRH
WAS
DE-
m e a su re d sp eed o f m ore th a n e ig h ty fe e t th e le tte r M in to h e r re f r ig e r a to r ? A ns.
of g reetin g , all p erso n al, a n d th e n th e
a second.
— B ec a u se it w ill c h a n g e ice in to mice.
:__________________________ _ p a r ty s a t d ow n to d in n er. I t w as a ! STROYING HER LIFE— PE
cam p d in n e r, cooked in ca m p ovens
RU-N A SAVED HER.
a n d se rv ed w ith ca m p d ish e s. T h e r e '
w ere a p ot ro a st o f beef, c o m , p eas, !
M iss M a ria D u ch arm e, 182 S t. E liia -
p o tato es, b re a d a n d b u tte r a n d coffee.
T h e P re s id e n t fell to w ith a n a p p e “ ‘j1 « f e e t . M o n treal, C a n ., w rites:
7 am ’’sL sfied t h a t th o u sa n d s of
The air arisin g from low, m arshy places, damp cellars, stagn an t ponds tite th a t a p p a re p tly w a s v o racio u s. H e
and pools and from decaying vegetable matter, as w ell as the gases from had tw o h elp in g s o f beef, a n d a te so w om en ■uffef becau se th e y d o n o t real-
how b ad th e Y r*a l | y
tr e a tm e n t
sewers, is loaded w ith germ s of m alarial poison. The water w e drink, that m uoh b re e d an d h o tte r th a t S e c re ta ry
has not been properly filtered and purified, is also full of these germ s and l.oeb w a s obliged to rep len ish th e p la te an d <eal a n a tu r a l d alicacy in c o n s u lt-
th re e tim es.
, ,n K a p h y sic ia n .
microbes, and as we d aily
___
breathe and drink m illion s o f
* a l a b i a IN H ia BTtnxM F O B y e a b s .
T _______________
h e re a r e finicky __________________
people, n o t to s s r , 1 . 1 ,e it ba<1|y ,o r y ear8 ’ h ad » « " ib le
th ese in to t h e s y s te m , to b e
F o r several year* I suffered w ith C hills an d ¡p ern ick e ty , who th in k the w o rd " b a lly " palr'* ' an d a t , I ™M" w8" u n a b le to a t-
te n d * to m y d a ily d u tie s .
to
a b s o rb e d b y t h e b lo o d , t h e F ever, cmnsed by M alaria in m y sy stem , an d each Is v u lg ar.
* I ‘ tr “ ie ‘ d J *”
H r sa id be w a s "b u lly *—
e n t i r e b o d y b e g in s to feel t h e
fo r ? v r n l y ra r* 1 T® ?*! havV re)apae’ w hen s rough rid e r ask ed him how hs c u re m y self, b u t fin a lly m y a tte n tio n
e ffe c ts o f t h e p o is o n . T h e F m .lly m y physician p r e « n b e d S. S S. I t en- felt, how he liked b is recep tio n , w h a t w as called to an a d v e rtise m e n t of P eru -
a.
e
e
tire ly cured m e; I have never been tro u b le d since,
be th o u g h t o f th e city, th e S ta te , tb s n a in a s im ila r case to m in e , an d I de-
m o s t c o m m o n fo rm o f M a-
w . M a rk et S t., L ouisville, K y. L S h a p o p p .
t a n a is " c h i l l s a n d f e v e r ,”
country o r th e u n lv e rse . E v e ry th in g c i' i ^ *? * ,Te il ■ • " ¿ J *
m I
but when the blood is th orough ly saturated w ith the poison it becomes so w a s "b u lly ,” an ut
d so WS. he
He
“ soon
rted to use Peruna and soon
I w as a
w eak and polluted that abscesses, carbuncles, boils, sores, ulcers and other laughed like a schoolboy on v a c atio n . sta
wrM wom an. I f e d that I ow e my Nfe and
sk in diseases result. M alaria also affects the liver, kid n eys, bow els and H e let dow n In e v e ry w ay. T h e se n my health to your w onderful medicine and
stom ach, producing a ch ron i»state of bilion sn ess th at often results in jau n trie s a ro n n d th e fen ce w ere d e a f to the gratefully acknowledge this fact.” —Maria
dice or som e m align ant fever. In cases of Malaria th e blood m ust be puri p lead in g s o f th e c ro w d w ho w a n te d to Ducharm e.
fied before the body can regain its natural health. S . S . S . con tain s purify g et In. an d th e P re a ld e n t, aa he Bald
A d d ress D r. H a r tm a n , P re s id e n t of
in g and tonic properties possessed by no other blood m edicine, and is the him self, "p lay ed h o okey" fro m being T h e H a rtm a n S a n ita riu m , C o lu m b u s ,
ideal remedy for the treatm ent of Malaria. It des P re s id e n t fo r th re e h o u rs, a n d h ad lb* ° h io ' ,o r ,re * m edical ad v ice,
troys the germ s of the disease and bu ild s up th e tim e o f h is life.
I A l* c o rre sp o n d e n t* s tr ic tly confiden-
weakened, polluted circulation. It enters in to th e
------------!______________
tis i.
blood and forces out every particle of poison and
P r e r e r * H e a v y T o m b sto n e .
|-------------------- ----------- - -------------------------------------
waste matter and adds stren gth and activ ity to it.
Mr*, f la n k s — W h at so rt o f tom b
S . S. S. im proves the appetite and d igestion , tones up the entire system by sto n e «hall w* g e t fo r d e a r m o th e r—
its alterative and pu rifying action, and Malaria, w ith all its bad effects, ia so m e th in g e la b o ra ta o r ■ p lain on*?
■ i f '
S y r u p . ra a te - a ' . ' - - 1 U e *
perm anently driven from the system
Book on the blood and any m edical
Mr. H a n k s — W ell, I th in k so m e th in g
t
advice, w ithout charge.
THE S W IF T SPEG U IC G O ., ATLANTA, GA, good a n d b e v y w ill b* b e s t.—C lev e
la n d L **d«r.
1
■ in tiro«». S o li by 4 ru g g ia te
Please
Your H air
A lifers
CASTOR l A
The Kind You Have Always Bought
AA A I A D I A A Poison Breathed
l V \ M L _ M r \ l M into the System
™ *W ¥ *F *