A GOOD POSITION
There is a good position oppor
tunity increased pay as Boon aa
you are qualified.
During the past four months
we placed 143; salaries ranging
from 45 to 125 dollars per mo.
257 positions we could not fill.
Why not Bpend a profitable Win
ter with us? Wiie for catalog.
BUSINESS COLLEGE Portland, Ore.
I. M. WALKER, Prei.
Portland Y.M. C. A. Auto School
Day and nig:ht claBsea. Expert trainlnce
In repairing, driving and machine work.
Including forgo, lathe, ahaper. drill press,
tractors, etc. Time unlimited. COMPE
TENT CHAUFFEURS AND MECHAN
ICS SUPPLIED. WHITE US.
Two It Company.
After saying his prayers at night
the 7-year-old son of parents In Bryn
Mawr announce that he was so tired
of the kind of life he was compelled
to lead that he believed there was
nothing for it but for him to run away.
The father considered the matter
thoughtfully, and then said:
"George, if that is the way you feel,
there Is money in my purse here, you
may take It all."
The boy packed up his grip, got to
the front door, came back on the
ground, of having forgotten his tooth
brush, and went downstairs again. The
parents were much disturbed to know
what he would do. He opened the
front door, went out on the veranda,
and all was silence. The father and
mother looked at each other, but
thought the course they had adopted
the best, and hence did not make a
move.
After 15 minutes of intense anxiety
the door opened and a boy's voice
called out: "Say, dad, if I'm going
away alone I'd better take mother
along, don't you think?" Pittsburgh
Dispatch.
iyj
Lk JLL
OLMES
BUSINESS COLLEGE
WASHINGTON ti TENTH STS)
PORTLAND.. ORfL.
HAWTHORNE AUTO SCHOOL
Oregon's oldeat, beat equipped and most
practical school. Expert instructions in
repairing, driving: and adjusting Practi
cal work in the repair shop, You do the
work with your own hands. Day and night
classes. Address
445 Hawthorne Are. Portland, Ore.
HIDES, PELTS, CASCARA BARK,
WOOL AND MOHAIR.
We want all you hava. Write for prices and shipping tags
THE H. F. NORTON Co. Portland. Ore., Seattle; Wn
ELECTRIC MOTORS
Bought, Sold, Rented and Repaired
WALKER ELECTRIC WORKS
Burneide, cor. 10th. Portland. Ore.
REDUCED FREIGHT RATES
To and from all points on household goods, pianos,
and automobiles. Information cheerfully iriven.
Pacific Coast Forwarding Co., JS
FARMS AND BUSINESS SOLD
Do you want to sell your farm, home or buatnesa
for cash? Write to CARTER REALTY CO..
604 Buchanan Building, Portland, Oregon
O
Oreson Vulcanizing Company
(The Tire Shop) has moved into larger
quarters in the heart of the automo
bile district, Burnside at Broadway,
833 and 335 Burnside St., Portland. Or.
If You Can't Get It In Town.
Someone In almost every town in
the United States sells Hanford's Eal
sam of Myrrh. If you can't get it
write G. C. Hanford Mfg. Co., Syra
cuse, N. Y. Price BOc and $1.00. Adv.
A Girl's Proposal.
"And I have tried to make it cleai
to you in every way I knew. I've
asked you to this house, times without
number. I've played tennis with you,
and walked and talked with you, am.
ridden your rounds with you in your
bumpy old milk wagon. I've simply
thrown myself at your head, day after
day. But you you wouldn't under
stand. You wouldn't look at me. Nor
listen. You mooned about, and moped
your ridiculous heart out. Because
you thought I was such a blind, silly
fool, I couldn't look past your poverty
and your ill-luck, nnd see how splendid
you really are. Because you thought
1 was such a stuck-up simpleton I'd
not want to marry you, because you
were a milkman, when I'd chase the
cows for you, if you wanted me to."
Woman's Home Companion.
For lame back use Hanford's Bal
sam. Rub it on and rub it in thor
oughly. Adv.
Safety First Selfishness.
"If your children are to be sure of
escaping this particular germ," said
the scientist, "you'll have to take them
into the country."
"Won't you please keep that a se
cret for a few hours longer?"
"Why?"
"So that I can move out before the
country people hear about It and re
fuse to take any children to board."
Washington Star.
DOC WHITE ALWAYS WAS
HOODOO TO POOR YANKS
Long After He Wat All Done, White
Sox Carried Him on Pay Roll
Just to Kill New York.
For several seasons after Doc White
had outlived his usefulness against
the general run of American league
clubs he was retained as a member of
the White Sox hurling corps for the
especial benefit of the Yankees. A
mark for practically every other team
in his circuit during the last few
years of his Chicago connection, White
was a veritable left-handed Johnson
against the Yankees almost to the
very end.
Cnme a time eventually when a
managerial job called him to the Pa
cific coast for the first time in ninny
a long and dreary year, and the Yan-
SLEEPING IN QUEER PLACES
If A 1
Englishman Chooses Narrow Plank
120 Feet Above the Ground
for a Siesta.
A short time ago a man was dis
covered in the lunch hour fast asleep
on a plank. His arms were hanelne
down, one on each side of the board,
which was about a foot wide. He was
noring gloriously, and quite cureless
of the fact that If he turned over for
greater comfort he would "tumble out
of bed" 120 feet, for that .plank was
part of the scaffolding erected for the
repair of a church spire.
A similar disregard for danger was
reported lately during the erection of
an electrical plunt. One of the men,
engaged on the tall chimney, missing
his mate at the lunch hour, went up
the half-finished chimney to find him.
Ho discovered him fast asleep on a
narrow ledge of brick Inside the shaft.
a fall from which meant a drop of 80
feet.
The other week a circus arriyed in
certain town, not a hundred miles
from London, at an early hour, after
a long journey and a performance the
previous night. As a consequence few
of the company got any sleep. That
day there was the usual procession and
the afternoon performance. The lion
tamer had had a very rough time be
cause of the illness of one of his
beasts.
The evening performance arrived,
and the man hnd.to pretend to go to
sleep with his head on the body of a
couchant Hon, finishing up the per
formance by springing up nnd put
ting nls head in another lion's mouth.
But when the Jumplng-up time came
a gentle snore was heard. The man
was fast asleep with his head pillowed
on a Hon.
Going the Limit
"Did he tell you that you are the
only girl he has ever loved?"
"Yes, and he went farther than
that."
"He did? What else did he say?"
"He said that I was the only girl
he ever intended to love." Detroit
Free Press.
Easily Fixed. .
"My suitcase is badly rubbed In sev
eral places. I hesitate to take it
along."
"Nonsense, those rubbed places are
easily remedied. Paste on these la
bels. They are from very swell ho
tels." Louisville Courier-Journal.
' The Situation. .V ,
"la the world getting better?"
"Maybe so as a general proposition,
but what eood does It do me? My boss
is lust as grouchy, my janitor just
as mean and the neighborhood kids
quite as pestiferous." Louisville
Courier-Journal.
Spray-a-Cow
Keeps off flies or money back. $1
a gallon from your dealer, or order
by mail. PLUMMER DRUG.CO.
Third and Madison, Portland, Or.
n ff F Veal, Pork, Beef,
SH I r Poultry, Butter, Egtfs
AAA and Farm Produce
to the Old Reliable Everding house with a
record of 46 years of Square Dealings, and
be assured of TOP MARKET PRICES.
F. M. CRONKHITE
45-47 Front Street Portland, Oregon
For hot grease burns apply Han
ford's Balsam lightly until the fire Is
extracted. Adv.
Doc White,
kees felt free and easy In their com
petition against the White Sox. Their
hopes were speedily dashed, however,
for White had scarcely gone away
from Cliicngo when Ed Clcotte bobbed
up to cast upon the New Yorkers a
spell almost as potent as the old White
hoodoo itself.
A failure at Boston, Clcotte has
been of pretty much no account with
Chicago except when pitted against
the Yankees. Boston has given him
some unmerciful lacings, Detroit has
his number, Cleveland welcomes In
frequent appearance against the In
dians with squenls of joy, and even
Washington holds him In poor esteem.
Against the Yankees, however, he al
most Invariably looks like the best
pitcher In all the world.
Deserving the Fair.
"Colonel," asked the beautiful wife,
"when was the most trying moment
of your life?"
"It was when I went to my wife's
father for the purpose of asking him
to let me have her. He was very deaf
and I had to explain the matter before
20 clerks." London Saturday Journal.
Feminine Perceptions.
"What shall I do at the meeting
when I want to make a speech and
some others try to head me off?"
"Why, get the chairman to recog
nize you."
"Oh, that Is easy enough. I was
introduced to her last week at Mrs.
Pinkie's tea." Baltimore American.
For
Adv.
calks use Hanford's Balsam.
From One Who Knew.
" 'A burnt child dreads the fire,' " an
nounced the teacher during the lesson
in proverbs. "Now, give me a sen
tence different In wording, but mean
ing the same thing."
"Please, teacher," came a small
voice, "A washed child dreads the wa
ter." London Ideas.
"Anuric" cures Backache, Lumbago,
Rheumatism. Send 10c. Dr. V. M.
Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y., for large trial
package.
Something In Hit Favor.
"There's one thing I will say for
that fellow whose mistakes cause so
much trouble."
"What Is it?"
"He doesn't claim that his inten
Hons were good, anyhow." Detroit
Free Press.
Oregon Hernia Institute
Rupture treated mechanically-. Private
fitting rooms. Highest testimonial, He
suits guaranteed. Call or write.
JOHNSON eV UMBARGER
411-412 AUsk Building, Portland, Oregon
Write about your wants in this line to
FINKE BROS.,
183 Madison St.,
Portland, Ore.
P, N. U.
No. 38, 1916
Juit So.
"Postcards are said to Increase pos
tal business greatly."
"Why should that be?"
"Well, we write letters to our
friends, but we send postcards to ev
erybody." Louisville Courier-Journal.
Some Compensation.
She There isn't a bit of wood In
the house and the gas is turned off.
He HurTah! Then, for once,- the
cook can't burn the dinner! London
Answers.
IF YOU HAVE
RHEUMATISM
you should try Anti-Uric, the famoU3
remedy made from Roots and Berries.
It is guaranteed to cure thU cruel dis
ease in every stage.
We want every reale' of this paper
who is suffering from Rheumatism in
any form to try this discovery. Every
packaee guaranteed or money refund
ed. Price $1.50 prepaid, or we will
send by Parcel Post C. O. D. Circu
lars and convincing testimony free.
Address ANTI-URIC CO., 102 Sher
wood Building, San Francisco.
PAINT NOW
It will be money saved to protect the lumber against winter
' - - . a ai t.
weather. Get Color Cards trom your local aeaier.
Things That Are New.
To keep a woman's hands warm In a
muff a nickel cylinder which, when
heated on a stove, will retain the heat
for hours, has been Invented.
For use in French colonial waters
where rank vegetation would foul sub
merged wheels shallow draft boats
huve been built that are driven by
aeroplane motors and propellers.
Of German Invention is a camera
small enough to be carried by a pigeon
which takes photographs automati
cally as a bird flies with It over a
place of which Information is desired,
To help In adjusting the bearings of
car wheels when away from a repair
shop is the purpose of a new device
that locks a wheel firmly to the track
and prevents It being moved,
Padlocked pockets, with slots
through' which coins cun be dropped,
have been patented for use by persons
employed In public places who must
share with employers tips they recive.
To find leaks In motorcycle tires
there has been invented a box to fit
over them In compartments of which Is
loose cotton that Is moved by the es
caping air as It passes over a hole,
For hair singeing a comb has been
Invented that entirely surrounds the
hair and guards against any danger of
It catching fire.
A set of aluminum cooking utensils
with an Interchangeable handle for all,
easily kept cool, has been patented by
a New York Inventor.
An Englishman has Invented a de
vice to enable aviators In flight to pick
up messages from the ground by drop
ping a grapnel at the end of a line.
Attached to a life preserver invent
ed by a Buffalo man is a device that
enables him to breathe In the roughest
water and also to signal for help.
"Old Father Thames" as Physician
The charitable public of London is
taking in hand, with commendable en
ergy, the provision of means for help
ing maimed and wounded soldiers to
ward convalescence. Last year the
Itiver Thames was used for. giving
them short trips. This year it has
been arranged to give trips to 12,000
invalided lads every avuilable day
along the river as far as Richmond,
where as many as are able to disem
bark will be chaperoned to the park,
and there supplied with light refresh
ments.
Local and city committees are or
ganized, with medical skill, to insure
that the trips will be useful aids to the
restoration of health. Money has lit
erally flowed Into the fund for the pur
pose.
This Really Happened.
Not one woman In a dozen will be
lieve this story, although It is true.
Every other week Bill Smith can prove
it by rolling up his left pants' leg. The
alternate week the proof Is In the
laundry basket.
Bill works In a shop where a man
must have forearmB. He has solved
the underwear-sleeve problem by huv-
ing them cut off above the elbow.
The other day he bought new union
suits, and showed Mrs. Smith on one
arm how much he wanted cut off. The
next Sunduy morning he donned the
suit and found she had cut off the
right arm and left leg. He apprised
Mrs. Smith, but she retorted such a
blunder was "impossible."
But Bill had the proof, and he still
has It ; for on the union suit there Is a
seam around the left leg just below
the knee, where the cut-off has been
put back.
Bill says: "As we sew we rip, and
if we snip, Inadvisedly, It's best to sew
It on again,"
Passing of the Kimono.
Fortunately for the appearance and
for the business of the household, wom
en have abandoned kimonos for house
wear excepting for the bathrobe and
in case of sickness. There is no great
er encouragement to slopplness and
laziness than the kimono, although it
is a great garment In its place. The
everlasting sleeves are always in the
way, and the fronts have a habit of
presenting themselves directly under
one's feet.
Most women find It better to make
home dresses to open all the way down'
the front so they can be ironed with
out trouble. They can be snapped to
gether quickly or they may be buttoned.
Railroad Burning Coal Dust.
A device for burning both hard and
uoft coal dust and slftlngs, which have
formed mostly waste on the American
railroads since the beginning of their
history, has been perfected and at
tached to one of the largest of the con
solidation type locomotives In the
United States, owned by the Delaware
& Hudson railroad.
Once-Overi.
The wife who is plnlnly dressed and
does not have the luxuries you en
joy Is not necessarily unhappy, and
she may be getting much more out of
life than you are getting.
It may be that she and her husband
are laying up money for their old
age, while you and your husband are
spending all you earn..
wnen tne time comes that you
should be taking comfort and be free
from worry, you may find yourself
worried because of your scanty sav'
lngs, while the woman you pity to
day may then be secure In the
thought that she has enough to sup
port her to the end of her days.
So do not waste your pity on the
woman who Is so plnlnly dressed,
She may have more sense than you
at the present time nnd more com
fort in the years to eome.
Facts aa to Editors.
On rainy days, and also on other oc
casions which are not unconnected
with the postman's visit, we find the
whole of a truth Is tills from the
Thoninsvllle (Ga.) Times:
"If you see an editor who pleases
everybody, there will be a glass plate
over his face and he will not be stand
ing up." Collier's Weekly.
W. L. DOUGLAS
w,
the shoe that holds its shape"
$3.00 $3.50 $4.00 $4.50 & $5.00 kS&VSSU
Save Money by Wearing W. 1 Douglas
shoes. For sale by over 9000 shoe dealers.
The Best Known Shoes in the World.
'. L. Douglas name and the retail price is stamped on the bot
tom of all shoes at the factory. The value is guaranteed and
the wearer protected against high prices for inferior shoes. The
retail prices are the same everywhere. They cost no more in San
Francisco than they do in New York. They are always worth the
price paid for them.
phe quality of W. L. Douglas product is guaranteed by more
-- than 40 years experience in making fine shoes. The smart
styles are the leaders in the Fashion Centres of America.
They are made in a well-equipped factory at Brockton, Mass,
by the highest paid, skilled shoemakers, under the direction and
supervision ot experienced men, all working with an honest
determination to make the best shoes for the price that money
can buy.
Ask your shoe dealer for W. I Doug-las shoes. If he can
not supply you with the bind you want, take no other
make, vt
ret shoes
by return mall, postage free.
Write for Interesting: booklet explaining; how to
it shoes of the highest standard of quality for the prloe,
LOOK FOR W. L. Douglas
name and the retail price
tamped on the bottom.
President O
1 tt I
XJ
Boys' Shoes
Best In the World
$3.00 $2.50 & $2.00
W. I. Douglas Shoe Co., Brockton, Mum.
When You Follow
The Trail
Equipped Wi
.itaUSk SafMR.
Ousted.
"Why is that pig always trying to
get Into my room?" inquired the sum
mer boarder. "Do you think he has
taken a fancy to me?"
"Its his room during the winter,"
whispered the hired man, cautiously.
Extremes Meeting.
"That was a remarkable idea ot con
trasts the animal painter had in his
latest zoo picture."
"What was It?"
"He painted a laughing hyena stand
ing under a weeping willow." Balti
more American.
Not Iti First Appearance.
"It seems to me I've seen your face
somewhere else."
"I shouldn't wonder. This isn't the
first time I've ever taken it out."
Detroit Free Press.
O
Eyes
Granulated Eyelids,
tyes inflamed by expo
ure to Sun, Dust and Win!
quickly relieved by Marina
Eye Bemedy. No Smarting,
lust Eve Comfort. At
Your Druggist'" SOc per Bottle. Marine Eys
Salve inTubes 2 Sc. For Book oil he Eyefreeask
Druggists or Murine Eys Bemedy Ce., Chicago
Garbage?
Greene What makqe you think he
is a vegetarian?
Browne I have smoked his cigars,
London Answers.
Soldier Sweethearts.
Mistress I see that another soldier
has called for you, Mary. I thought
you had only one sweetheart?
Cook Oh, no, mum, two. You see,
one's a regular and the other's a spe
cial reserve. -Pearson's Weekly.
SMkm
How to Feel Well During Middle
Life Told by Three Women Who
Learned from Experience.
Keeping Frlendo.
"This poet Hpeaks about keeping
friends with oneself. That sounds
nonsensical for me."
"Not at nil. Didn't you ever call
yourself namea?"
"Ye-cs."
"And why? Because you had done
something of which yon did not ap
prove?" Kansas City Journal
Hence the Delay.
The Kiddie Come quick I There's a
mnn been fightin' my futher nmre'n
half an hour!
Policeman Why didn't you tell me
bpfore?
Tho Kiddle Because father was
gettln' the best of it until a few min
utes ago. Puck.
The Change of Life is a most critical period of a
woman's existence, and neglect of health at this time invites
disease and pain. Women everywhere should remember
that there is no other remedy known to medicine that will
so successfully carry women through this trying period as
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound, made from
native roots and herbs. Read these letters:
mm
M
If't'l ?
Philadelphia, Pa. 4 1 started tho Change of Life)
five years age. I always had a headache and back
ache with bearing down pains and I would have
heat flashes very bad at times with dizzy spells and
nervous feelings. After taking Lydia E. 1'inkham'B
Vegetable Compound I fuel like a new person and
am in better health and no more troubled with
the aches and pains I had before I took your won
derful remedy. I recommend it to my friends for I
cannot praise it enough." lira. Makgahet Grass
man, 75 N. Kinggold St., Philadelphia, Pa.
Beverly. MaRS. "I took Lvdin, E. Pinlchnm's
Vegetable Compound, for nervousness and dyspepsia, when I wns
going through the Change of Life. I found it very jelpful and I
have always spoken of it to other women who suiler as I did and
have had them try it and they also have received I
good results from it." Mrs. Geokoe A. Dunbar,
if 1 1.. L'i. T 1.. H '
xi avuuxiuy ot., Awvuiiy, iua.33.
Erie, Pa. UI was in poor health when the
Change of Life started with me and I took Lydia
E Pinlcham's Vegetable Compotuid, or I think I
should not havo got over it as easy as I did. Even
now if I do not feel good I take the Compound
and it restores me In a short time. I will praise
your remedies to every woman for it may help
them as it has mo." Mrs. E. Kisslino, U31 East
24th St., Erie, Pa.
No other medicine lias been to successful in relieving; woman's
suffering as has Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound.
Women may receive free and helpful advice by writing the Lydia
E. Pinkham Medicine Co., Lynn, Mass. Such letters are received)
and answered bj women ouly and held in strict confidence ,
liiiil