Ulusses
I Returned I
I I
J By HAROLD CARTER J
5v.w.'Aw.w.v.vA;jj
(Copyright, 1S15, by W. G. Chapmai)
"Children's Day" was the Idea cf
the 8up'-intendent of the new hos
pital. Old methods had been aban
doned and new ones ruled. Doctor
Oakley believed that In admitting the
little folks of the' town to the hospital
grounds once a month, in chargo ot
the matron, ho would cheer tip his
convalescents, inspire the young peo
ple with a sense of pity, and bring con
tributions to the hospjtal.
1 Ell Bnynes seemed a terribly old
person to Dorothy and Ned, though,
as a matter of fact, he was only forty.
But he had returned from the West
crippled with rheumatism, contracted
by working In the silver mines, and
after three months at the hospital he
was only Just beginning to regain his
health.
He sat In his wheeled chair, and his
eyes widened with pleasure as he
saw his little friends approaching.
"Tell us another story, Uncle EH,"
pleaded Dorothy, climbing upon his
knee.
"Another story T" Ell Inquired. "How
many stories do you think I know?"
"Hundreds," said Dorothy promptly.
"You are so old, you see. You must
be nearly a hundred, aren't you, Uncle
Ell?"
"Not quite so old," laughed Ell
Baynes. "Hot are you little folks
getting on at home?"
"It's Just like one of your own fairy
tales, Uncle Ell," said Ned. "Ever
since mother Inherited that fortune
f Felt a Mad impu't- to Flee.
we've been hitting . it up, as Mrs.
Smith, next door, says. We've had the
painters in and the plmnbors, and the
plasterers, and the the chairs have
bsen up up "
j "Upholstered," said Uncle Ell.
"And I only wish my papa could
come home and soe us now," said
Dorothy.
"You don't remembor your papa?"
questioned the sick man.
"No, Uncle Ell. But mothor does.
And when you get well she's going
to Invite you :o come and see us, and
perhaps got you a Job as our garden
er." "That will be fine," laughed Ell.
"Well, what story shall I toll you to
day?" "You promised to tell us about
Uilsha," said Ned.
"Not Uilsha Ulysses, my boy. Well,
git down and I'll see how much of It
I can remember. Ulyues was one of
the Greeks, yru know. He was a very
strong man, and he had a beautiful
wife named Penelope, whom he left
to go to the wars. He was away ten
years, because that war lasted ten
years."
"His wife must have missed him,"
said Dorothy.
"Why, I'm not sure whether she did
or not," said EH, "because, you see,
although the story doesn't admit It,
I'm afraid Ulysses was somethtlng of
waster. As far as I can make out,
he never did very much honest work.
He lived In a rather doubtful sort of
way. He was a pirate."
"When I grow up I'm going to be a
pirate," said Ned. "No, I won't
though. I'm going to chase pirates."
"Much better, Nod. Well, then, this
Ulysses went off to the wan and left
Penelope behind him. When the wars
wore over he came back, and that's
where his real troubles began. Ac
cording to his story he got caught In
a bad wind, and his ship drifted
around for ten years more before he
got home. But that's only his tale,
and lots of married men toll much
the same sort ot yarn to their wives,
only they can't lay It on as thick
nowadays. Anyway, even Ulysses ad
mitted that there were some ladles
concerned In his troubles, and he laid
tbem particularly to a Miss Circe, But
that won't Interest you.
"Well, Just about twenty years aft
er Ulysses started for the wars be
came home. You can guess he need
ed a shave and brush-up a good deal,
and nobody recognized him except
his old dog. And what do you suppose
was worrying him, Dorothy?"
' "I guess he wondered what there
was for dinner," said the little girl.
Ell nodded. "No doubt," he an
twered. "But that didn't prey upon
bit mind so much as the knowledge
that he hadn't acted quite at a mar
rled man should. He was scared lest
hli wife had thought him dead and
got married again."
"lira. Smlth'i husband left her, and
aha didn't get married again." said
Dorothy. "Bba wanted to, though.
"Bo back Ulyases eami to the guise
a baggar and nobody knew bin.
and tturn was a whole gang It men
after I'enelope. Eut Penelope was
true to Ulysses, and she kept putting
them off, and"
"There's mamma!" shouted the lit
tle girl. "I told you I was going to
bring her to see you. Uncle Eli."
She sprang to her feet, and, with
the little boy, raced across the green
toward a sweet-looking lady who was
strolling quietly in their direction un
der the shade of the hospital trees.
Ell BayneB sat rigid m his chair.
Then he looked wildly about him. He
had begged tlie superintendent to gft
lilm a propelling chair, so that '. e
could move front place to place, but
as yet his de-Ire had not teen com
piled with. Now he felt a mad Im
pulse to Ree.
He sat up and gingerly put one foot
to the ground. He must escape at all
hazard. To his surprise he found that
a certain measure of flexibility had re
turned to lils Ilmb3; perhaps it was
the will at work on the body. He put
out his other leg, and for the first
time In months Ell Paynes stood erect,
without support, and straightened bis
twisted limbs mid muscles.
Absorbed In this effort, he had not
seen how quickly the three were ap
proaching him again. As he was about
to attempt the walk to tho hospital
he found himself confronted by the
mothor of tho two children.
One glanco Into hiB face, a llttlo
gasp of fear, and Lucy Baynes was
weeping on her husband's neck, her
arms about him.
"Ell," she sobbed. "Oh, my dear,
why didn't you come home to me after
all these years?"
"You told me never to come back
until I had made a man of myself,
Lucy," said Ell doggedly. "I tried
I tried my hardest for ton yearo. I
made a llttlo fortune In the mines. I
sent you everything I had."
"You, Eli? That logacy was really
your money?"
He nodded. "And I did mean to ask
you If you would take me back again.
But I couldn't bear the thought of
coming back to you a cripple. So I
went to tho hospital here. And I
thought that if If you had met some
body whom you cared for more, I had
no right to stand In your way. I tried
to find out, Lucy."
"There couldn't be," she sobbed.
"I didn't know they were my chil
dren at first. Then I came to look
for Children's day, when I could see
them. And when I got well I moant
to go quietly away, If you cared for
somebody else"
"Oh, my dear, I have loved you al
ways, sho answerod.
It was n happy party that gathered
at the now house that night, and Nod
and Dorothy, BtlU open-oyed In won
der, had hardly realized that "Uncle
Ell" was to he their father.
Toll us some more about Ulysses.
Uncle Ell," persisted Ned, climbing
upon his knee.
'Why," said Ell In embarrassment.
"It ended happily very happily.
Only I guess thore was a lot more In
Ulysses' life than ever got Into his
story."
GREAT VARIETY OF BIRD PETS
l-over of Feathered Creatures May
Pay for Them Almost Any Price
That His Pjncy Dictates.
A recent International bird show
has provided somo' astonishing facts
and figures regarding tho value ot
song birds, remarks London Tlt-Bltn.
Thore aro nearly 100 classes of ca
naries. Tlmt they con bo Norwich or
Lancashire, bnrdor or Yoiksutre va
riegated, lizard, unfllyhlert, clear, crot
bred, emitted, self or foul convoys
very little to tho aveiagn mind, but
leaves one marveling ot t!e variety ol
chirping little croaturos whoso feath
ers are every concolvnblo nhado ol
yellow. One maivols also nt the va
riety of birds that could be kept as
pets. Flnchos, linnet, rodpolus, tom
tits, robins, wrens, Btonochats, bab
blers, redstarts nnd long tailed, short
tailed and created var'rtier, ot all of
them In every bIzo fn.'in the minute
humming bird to tho plump eccrlet
cockatoo, all vio for the popularity
which up to the i rf ent has boen the
monopoly of the cacaiy. And these
little birds arc all quite c"iep. A tew
shillings will hu incut ot them, but,
on the other hand, $2,600 woa'd be
asked for gnrpeous crimson bird of
paradlao. or $5,000 for the cnnary-bul-linen
Whito Roso, the moat expensive
song bird In tho world. .
Serbian Military Pensions.
Serbian roMleit enjoy a pension,
grantad only to Invalid cases. These
pensions are for past wsrs, not the
present. Tim ordinary vetotan who
does not suffer come Injury which
would rondor him Invktld doo not
receive a pension, military seivlce In
Serbia being compulsory. Invalid pen
sions In Serbia are paid by tho year;
that ts, cacti applicant who it granted
a pension receives a certain sum each
year, In can the soldlei receives In
juries which would nuly render him
partially Invalid ho receives only part
ot the yearly amount, most likely one
half; but In caso of the soldier bolng
totally Invalid ho gets tho full amount
Different From the Reit.
"I've got to do something to attract
attention," aald the eminent theatri
cal star.
"That's right," replied the press
agent "You've got to seem different
and surprise the public some way.
I'll tell you what we'll do. We'll send
out a story to the el?ect that you are
not considering a fabulous effot to
appear In the lucvlei."
Developed Powers Late,
William de Morgaa Is tho most not
able example ot a writer who tost
noned the crcatlou ot literary mast or
pieces until In advanced lire. He had
never published anything until hit
"Joseph Vance" turprlsod tho reading
world when he was tixty-nve, ana no
hat followed It with halt a dozen othor
long and most Interesting novela
oth dtrono.
"Jaggs aald the story I told him the
other day made him hold nit breath.
"Oaa wbttt, but It ba aicceedtd In
holdlna- hit breath. It mutt have bee
I a tuatltP
DIFFERENT TYPES
Farmer's Icehouse
(Prepared by the United States Depart
ment ot Agriculture.)
The dairy division of the United
States department of agriculture has
been investigating the different types
of icehouses in use by dairymen, and
has studied the advantages of each
type. Only a small number ot the
Icehouses examined by the depart
ment's specialists were built of new
lumber.
In many Instances ice was stored
In the cellar under the house or barn,
or In the corner of some building, such
as a woodshed, corncrib, or barn, or
under the driveway leading to the
barn, and occasionally it was simply
stacked outdoors with no roof for pro
tection. Where the ice was stored In
cellars, open sheds or In stacks, the
loss from melting was comparatively
large, depending on the ventilation,
drainage and care In packing. Where
the cost of harvesting ice Is a small
Item, dairymen often say that It Is
less expensive to store in such places
than to go to the expense of building
an up-to-date Icehouse. Where Ice is
stacked outdoors and covered with
some form of Insulation, It is neces
sary to put up from 30 to 50 per cent
more than the amount previously al
lowed, so as to provide for the heavy
shrinkage. '
The ice should be stored as near
the mllkhouse as possible, In order to
save labor in removing it to the milk
tank. A great many dairymen find It
an advantage to have the milk room
in one end of the Icehouse. - In this
way the cost of a Beparate tankhouse
is eliminated. The small amount ot
time and labor required to transfer
the ice to the cooling tank generally
acts as an added Incentive for the
free use of ice. It ts highly Impor
tant that the milk room, whether com
bined with the icehouse or standing
alone, be located so that objoctlon
able odors will he avoided.
In comparing the dlfforeit methods
of storing Ice, It was found that where
the cost of Ice was ' comparatively
high It was advisable to spend enough
money In building and Insulating the
Icehouse to protect the Ice from melt
ing as much as possible, but In cases
where the cost of the ice was small
It appeared that the owners were often
Justified in building a cheaper stor
age with a relatively high loss of tee
from meltage. The dairyman there
fore should consider both the cost
ot construction and the cost of the
ice in selecting the type most suita
ble for his requirements.
Some farmers Btore their ice in
roughly constructed bins. One of this
sort was seen, made by placing large
posts of Irregular sizes three feet in
the ground and about four feet apart,
and upon these were nailed a miscella
neous lot of boards; no roof was pro
vided. The shrinkage was reported
from 30 to 50 per cent. Ice might be
stored in this mannor for some pur
poses, but this method is not recom
mended for a dairy farm. Further
more a bin ot this sort is very un
sightly and is an indication ot slack
methods in farming. Where ice is
cheap and building material high, It
might be permissible as a temporary
arrangement; but It ts not to eco
nomical a method as may appear at
first sight, for the cost 'of the Ice
lost In the shrinkage would generally
amount to more than the Interest on
the cost ot constructing a serviceable
Icehouse.
An Instance was observed in which
a corner of a woodshed, about twelve
feet square and ten toot high, had
been converted Into an Ice shed. This
corner of the woodshed had been
roughly boarded up and about 14
inches of sawdust placed around the
ice on all sides, top, and bottom. The
cost ot the building was very little,
and the shrinkage was reported at
about !0 per cent The owner stated
that softwood tawdust Is a much bet
ter Insulation than hardwood saw
dust. Tba Icehouse In the Illustration
moasures 15 by 20 feet on the out
side and I teet high. At the front
or south end a room 15 by 6
feet It partitioned off and used for a
milk room. The remaining space,
15 by It feet by 8 foot high, after
allowing for 6 Inches ot wall, 12
Inches of sawdust on the tides, 12
Inches on the bottom, and 18 Inches
on tbo top, will provide space for
about IT tont of Ice. This house ts
built on high, sloping ground, whore
the toll Is porous, consequently the
draluago ts satisfactory. The founda
tion Is made ot concrete (mixture 1
to 6), m teet wide at the bottom and
sloping gradually until the top meas
ures 8 Inches. The silts which rest
on the foundation are ( by 6 Inches,
upon which are erected t by (
Inch studding with 24-Inch centers. On
the top ot the studding rests a 1 by
( Inch plate, and the ttudt are
sheathed inrlde and outside with
rough boarding. The outside la then
covered with weatherboardlng. The
root hat a two thirds pitch and la con
structed ot 1 by 4 Inch rafters, 14
Inch centers, boarded and covered
with tblnglea, In each gable It
located a slat ventilator, t by IM
feet, which w'th tba high pitch ot the
root allows for an abundance of free
circulation ot air over tba lea. Tba
aaUk room la provided with two glaat
OF DAIRY ICEHOUSES
With Milk Room.
windows 3 by 2 feet, one in each
ena. i ne milk room is provided only
with a movable Ice-water tank su.
by 4 by 3 feet. In which are placed
me cream cans. A rope and pulley
which are fastened to the ceillne are
used in transferring the ice from the
icenouse up and over the wall and
lowering It into the tank. The matn.
rial and labor for constructing this
tuiuoinauon milk- and icehouse
amounted to $125. The shrinkage on
the 100 cakes in r'orage was esti
mated at about 15 to 20 per cent. The
Ice in this house coat 2 r.Anta n rnlra
exclusive of hauling and storing.
GOOD FEED FOR YOUNG FOAL
Colt Should Be Taught to Nibble at
Grain With Dam Weaning Made
Rather, Easy Task.
Are you giving that young foal the
proper care? To become a strong,
sound horse, when matured the foal
must be well nourished and eiven
every advantage possible.
The foal should be taueht to eat
grain very early. By placing the feed
box from which the dam eats her grain
now, the foal, at about two months of
age, will begin nibbling with the moth
er, and will soon acauire a taste fnu
the grain.
A pen built in one corner nf thn
field made high enough to keep the
mare out and allow the colt to pass
under will make it possible to feed
the foal grain with very little diffi
culty. Allow the mare in the Inclo
sure with the foal for a few times,
and it will soon learn to go In it
self. Keen a liberal sunnlv nf era In
preferably oats and bran, and perhaps
some cracked corn, in the feed box.
To Induce the dam to loiter about
with the colt, have the pen near a
snade tree or the salt box.
By weaning time the foal will have
become thoroughly accustomed to eat
ing grain and will wean very easily,
besides being in better condition as
a result ot this additional teed.
SERIOUS DISEASE OF CALVES
Diphtheria Is Very Contagious and
Contracted Principally by Young
Animals Some of (Symptoms.
Calf diphtheria is a serious disease
appearing among calves three to five
days old. Infected calves refuse to
drink or suck, have some discharge ot
saliva from the mouth and there are
Inflamed patches inside the mouth
which gradually develop Into ulcers.
There is fever, and an offensive odor
from the mouth. The disease 1b very
contagious and is contracted princi
pally by young calves and pigs up to
six or eight months old, although oc
casionally adult cattle and hogs have
It.
Dr. M. H. Reynolds of the Minne
sota station advises treating the sores
by first cleaning with a 2 per cent so
lution of creolln In warm water and
then treating twice a day with a solu
tion of permanganate of potash, two
ounces to a gallon ot water, this treat
ment to be kept up for about a week.
The potash solution should be made
fresh each time. Thoroughly clean up
the calf pen and yards and spray with
disinfectant.
Handy Door Fastener.
To prevent doors from swinging
back and forth, staple a ring into the
door cleat far enough from the end ot
the cleat so that It does not Interfere
with the closing ot the door. Push
the door back and fasten with a strap,
with a anap In It, to the building.
Have the strap eight or ten Inches
long and alack enough so that the
door can be fastened. This will be
found a convenient device tor all
doors or wlndowt that are on hlnget
and are to be left open.
Neglected Fruit Treet.
Neglected fruit treet are not worth
the ground they occupy; besides they
are an eyesore to everyone, and when
Infested with worms and Insects they
are a constant menace to the neigh
borhood. There ought to be laws
prohibiting any man from allowing
treet ot thlt kind to remain on hi
farm.
Quick Money-Maker.
The f rst Investment In raising pork
Is small and the pig Is a quick money
maker on tho farm. He multiplies
rapidly, and If you only furnish him
good pasture, grazing crops, pure
water and a little concentrated food
he will rapidly gain weight at a small
cost
Proper Place for Tools.
Gather up the tools and small Imple
ments that usually are scattered all
over the place at thlt teason ot the
year, or you'll be tha loser when the
first tnow falls and covert them up
till they cannot ba found again during
tha whole winter.
Right Kind to Keep,
Don't make cholca ot droopy-tailed
mala birds; choose for keeping the
alert-eyed, gamey. spirited membert ot
tha Bock that are up to ilia, weight,
color and shape for tba breed.
TAB Off 1 'PHONE
Meter Tells Exactly How Long
One Has Talked.
Sweet Conversation of Lovers, and
Neighborhood Gossip, Alike Will
Be Measured by Contrivance
Claimed to Be Perfected.
Hereafter you will have no show
with the telephone operator when dis
puting as to whether you talked over
your allotted time, and must pay ex
tra, for they have geared a meter to
the 'phone so that the time is clearly
Indicated. The costly whimsicalities
of the taxicab meter at once come to
mind, suggesting that a new sore trial
is to be added to the operation of
the telephone. All service in this time
of efficiency and exactitude tends to
be metered. The gas and electric me
ters we know; the water meter some
oppose frantically, but vainly; the
meter in the taxicab drives us mad
as it ticks off the miles, and now we
are even to talk by meter!
Increased efficiency has come to be
pretty much the secret of increased
subscribers' lists, increased revenue
and increased cordiality In the business
of telephony generally. Nowhere along
the line, however, has the cordiality
been more often or more sorely
strained than through inefficient, In'
adequate or careless timing of toll
calls.
Particularly Is this true, declares
Telephony, in smaller offices, where
the elaborate and necessarily expen
sive apparatus for timing calls has
been too costly for installation, and'
dependence has been placed upon or
dinary clocks, which are, of course,
as unsatisfactory to the company
itself as to- the telephone-toll user.
The 'phone-meter, It is claimed, has
completely solved this small office
timing problem, and in larger offices
It is already proving of great value
in timing the handling of calls on the
observation desks.
As shown In the accompanying Illus
tration, the 'phone-meter registers up
to six minutes In one revolution of
the dial, and It continues until stopped.
When a connection is made the opera
tor starts the meter to record by mov
ing to the right the lever at the top.
Moving It in the reverse direction
stops the indicator instantly, Bhowtng
the exact time which has elapsed In
minutes and seconds. The dial is grad
uated to seconds, and the device, it is
said, is marvelously accurate.
The 'phone-meter is placed upon the
keyboard within convenient reach of
the operator. If while the conversa
tion Is In progress an interruption oc
curs the meter may be stopped and
then started again when service is
resumed. The operator is thus not
obliged to make any calculations as
to the time consumed. The 'phone
meter may also be used by subscribers
to check the time of toll calls.
This is all very well for the power
ful corporation anxious to prevent the
slightest loss of earning, but It Is said
that sentiment Is not even remotely
considered, says one sweet young
thing who has phonomanla. "Imag
ine," she suggests with sorrow and
contempt, "hitching a stopclock to a
real sweet-and-tender love conversa
tion! Why, they are simply clocking
the whole ot romance out ot the
world! This measure by clocks and
Here Is the Hello Cupid's Tab Keeper,
Which Cannot Be Hoodwinked.
meters will simply reduce the human
race to unimaginative cogs In a big
machine a perfect mechanism, I will
admit, but still a machine."
Battle-Ax Once More.
Among the many old-time weapons
that have been seen In the present
war Is the battle-ax. A British out
post, trapped by the enemy as they
were chopping wood for camp fires,
not many days since, whipped round in
their shirt sleeves and did deadly
work with their axes. So usefully did
this mode of Ighting serve them that
they steadily drove the toe before
them.
It was too short a range for the Gor
men rifles to be ot any use, while
for the English soldiers the grasp on
the German rifle barrel and the swing-In.-
blow ot the ax In the other hand
did all that was required, and tew got
away to tell the tale.
Another Mystery of the 8ea.
Another mystery ot the sea occurred
recently oft the English coast. Three
miles from Jersey, the fishing tmack
Ella 70? ot Granville hat been found
derelict. She had a catch on board
In good condition; her sails were let
though badly torn, but there wat no
sign ot the cew. Some years ago a
similar case occurred. The Marie
Celeste, a larfce sailing ship, was found
somewhere In the Mediterranean In
like circumstances. Those who went
aboard saw everything undisturbed, a
meal half-eat jn and barely cold, clock!
going, and not a soul on board; and
nothing has been heard ot her crew
from that day to this.
Trade Statistics.
An export total ot approximately
$75,000,000 it the indicated record ot
American manufacturers ot cotton
goods In the fiscal year 1915. while
Imports ct cotton manufacturers will
probably fall below $50,000,000, mak
ing the balance ot trade on tha export
tide about $25,000,000, at against an
Import balance In every earlier year
in tba country'! history, aava 1805,
when tba excess of txporta la thlt
croup waa about $1,000,000.
FOOD WORTH MUCH STUDY
No Other Problem Can More Worthily
Engage the Attention of the Moth
er on the Farm.
What could be a woman'e problem
on the farm that was not a woman's
eternal problem everywhere and any
where? Home economics or the se
lection, use and preparation of food,
clothing, shelter and household man
agement, and how can this problem,
or any other problem, for that matter,
be solved except through study or ed
ucation? And yet so little has been
thought of the home problems that
more money is spent year by year for
teaching the men how to fatten a steer
or pig than to teach a mother how to
care for her babe or feed her superior
animals the men of the family, writes
M. E. Barrett of the Texas experiment
station: Visit any farm you please
and you will be shown the fine pigs
and calves, goats or sheep, but never
a word of the baby or its nursery.
I've even seen kindergartens for colts
to train them in their stunts, but
never a home garten for the children.
I believe you will all agree with me
that food is the first problem. To
load your table down with vege
tables and meats Is not treating your
child as your husband treats his pig
baby. He is carefully balancing the
rations for the pig for growth, and
that ot the horse for energy, and that
of the cow for milk. Neither is he
working all day long on the three
meals a day for his animal family.
Now here Is where education comes in
again, to cut down the work of those
three meals in quantity and make it
count in quality, to take less time and
more thought. Try a tireless cooker.
Get a bulletin on balanced rations and
menus from the university. Then, in
the cool ot the afternoon, prepare your
vegetables and meats tor next day; at
breakfast bring them to a boll and put
in the hot rock and close up the din
ner. This will save you from one to
two hours on dinner which can be
spent In further study on the subject
ot food values.
PICKLED APPLES FOR WINTER
Delicacy That Will Be Appreciated In
Cold Weather When Most Fruits
Are Scarce.-
Peel, core and quarter some sharp
apples, throwing them into a brine
made by boiling six ounces of salt for
one minute In a quart of water, flavor
being improved by a few slices of mild
onion, and color by fresh vine or fig
leaves. Leave then closely covered
for 24 hours, then, having drained and
carefully wiped the fruit and put it
into an unglazed stoneware jar, pour
over It a pickle composed of vinegar
brought nearly to the boil, with some
allspice, black pepper and either
horse-radish or whole ginger, or both,
in the proportion of one ounce each to
the quart, the addition ot half a dozen
cloves, a couple of bay leaves, a blade
of mace and two or three shallots or
a little garlic if liked.
Stand, covered first, with vine or
fig leaves, then with a plate, for 24
hours in a corner by the fire, drain
off the. liquor, reheat it, pour again
over the fruit, screened with fresh
leaves, and tie down.
Meat Souffles.
Meat of excellent flavor is needed
for meat souffles. Chicken and ham
are favorites. They should be chopped
fine and then pounded smooth. Un
less smooth and fine they will not mix
with the egg thoroughly. White sauce,
stirred into yolks, meat added, and
nice seasonings, then the whites fold
ed In is the order of procedure. An
even tablespoonful of meat is about
all one egg will hold up unless an ex
pert handles the material.
Creamed Fish With Potato.
Mash and season potatoes and line
bottom and sides of dish about one
and one-half Inches thick. Make a
white sauce, add boiled salt fish bro
ken in pieces and put the whole in
the potato nest. Cover top with the
potato and put pieces of butter on top.
Make two slits with knife and bake
until potato is nicely ' browned. In
place ot fish cold meat mixed with
gravy may be used.
Cauliflower Salad.
Trim and boll one firm head of fresh
cauliflower In fresh water until tender,
but do not allow it to boil soft. Re
move trom the fire and drain. When
cold slice thinly then allow to mari
nate one hour In highly seasoned
French dressing. When ready to serve
drain and lay on fresh lettuce leaves,
sprinkle with finely chopped walnut
meats and red pepper. Place a heap
ing tablespoonful of mayonnaise on
top ot each portion.
Jelly Roll.
Pour eggs, well beaten, one cupful
sugar, one cupful flour, one teaspoon
ful cream of tartar, one-halt teaspoon
ful toda and a very little aalt. Beat
well. Spread thin In a large pan to
bake. Taket perhaps 15 minutes. As
toon at baked trim oft the two long
edget with a sharp knife, spread the
cake with any kind ot Jelly and roll
(n a napkin while warm.
Grape Cordial.
One quart grape Juice, one and one
half pounds of white sugar (loaf Is
best), an even tublespoonful ot cinna
mon and simmer half an hour. Seal
while hot Will keep years. This is
an excellent tonic for the stomach.
Dose, a tablespoonful several timet a
day, or when tired take a teaspoonful.
Avoid Vegetable Burning.
It you will place a pie plate upside
down Id the kettle you will avoid all
burning of the potatoes or other vege
table. If you should happen to for
get them and the water boll dry.
Your vegetables will be on top of the
pie plate and not scorched In tha least
CreenCom Frlttera.
Cut from tha ears a pint of corn,
beat together a cupful ot milk, two
Ubleapoonfult ot melted butter, one
gg. whipped light salt to taste and
enough flour to make a thin batter.
Into this stir tha grater corn. Beat
bard and bake oa a eoapetoei grHdla
ONE LITTLE DETAIL MISSING
When Asked .'or Name of Secretary of
War Bill Morgan Wants to Know
Which War It Meant.
In a rural district of Kansas two la
borers working on the country high
way discussed various people and
settled affairs of nations as they wield
ed pick and shovel. Finally one of
them referred to the secretary of
war, and the other asked:
"Hiram, who is the secretary of
War?"
T don't remember his name," said
HI, "but here comes old Bill Mor
gan. We'll ask him."
So, as old Morgan drove up one of
the laborers called out: "Hey, Bill,'
kin you tell us who the secretary of
war is?"
"Well," said Bill, "I oughter know.
but I can't seem to remember." And
he drove on, thinking deeply.
Soon the two men saw BIH coming
backhand when he came within hail
ing distance, he called out: "Say, you
fellers, what war did you mean?"
Cautious Publicity.
"Isn't that rather frivolous reading
you are engaged in?"
"No," replied Senator Sorghum.
These Jokes are pretty serious so
far as I am concerned. The humor
ous anecdotes that go around with a
public man's name worked into
em may have a great deal of in
fluence in giving the public an
idea of his personality. Hereafter I
am going to hand out my own anec
dotes." Domestic Criticism.
After arduous toll the poet had per
fected a Bonnet.
"Ah!" he exclaimed. "This will sure
ly make me famous!"
A few minutes later he read It to
his wife and waited for comment.
'It's a pretty piece," she said. "I
like to see the lines all about the
same length, Instead of raggedy, as
they are in some of your longer po
ems, dear.'
Can't See It That Way.
"Fatherly pride Is a ereat thin.
There's Dubson's boy. Just because
the youngster is making good marks
at school Dubson is as proud as It he
were doing it himself."
'Ah, yes. Poor Dubson ! He was
always at the foot ot the class when
ha was in school, yet if you tell him
the boy takes after his mother he is
grievously offended."
A Has Been.
"Look at that poor old drink-sodden
wretch."
"Evidently he's down and out."
"Yet there was a time when h
amounted to something in the world."
xou don't say so!"
"Why, I've seen him Ditch tha first
ball In the opening game of a ma.
1or league baseball season."
GRECIAN ART.
He The Greeks were once leaders
ot thought.
She Yes. they seem to run to ex
tremes. Instead ot polishing people's
minus a great many Greeks are now
engaging In polUhing people's shoes.
An Explanation.
"Why do they call 'em lawyers'
brlefe pa? Are they ao short?"
"No, my ton; but by the time they
get through with them the lawyers'
clients are."
Hanging Out There.
"Pop, will you tell me something."
"Sure, my son."
"It the best place to tee the wash of
the tea when you cross the line?"
Paradoxical Humor.
"What It the matter with the fel
low who ta quarreling with the hotel
clerk?"
"Evidently be it tour about hit
suite."
The Result
"George't tpeech last night wat bit
maiden effort."
"That ao? I thought It Bounded Tory
much Ilka a miss."
The Object
"I am going into tha laundry butt
aeea." "Wbyr
"Becanta I want to dean ap a pile.
1