ANNOUNCEMENT to our patrons
throughout the Pacific Northwest:
PORTLAND'S
ropuui
HOTEL OREGON
bu been placed under the management of
N. K. Clarke, who was for many years
connected with the Portland. Cornelius
and Seward Hotels, and who will always
extend to all a cordial welcome.
Commencing November lit we shall In
augurate the American plan in connection
with the European plan.
We solicit your patronage.
American Plan, $3 to $5 per day.
European Plan, $1 per day np.
N. K. CLARKE, Mgr.
"USE THE RIVER"
Dalles -Columbia Line
State of Washington, for The Dalles dally ex.
Sunday 11 p. m. Leave Dalles daily ez. Monday
12 M. Steamers J. M. Teal, Inland Empira and
Twin Cities for Upper Columbia and Snake river
points. Taylor St. Dock. Tel. Main 613.
Wlaaettt and blaatii Hirer Tsin Cs, Partite!
55
Valuable Formulas. Tricks. Illusions.
and Household Hints in our interesting
magazine tor two issues, sent
Complete for
Jackson & Co., 328 Chamber of
Commerce, Portland, Ore.
10c
NO MEDICINE
If you are ailing In anyway, and want help,
write me. DR. h. M. DAVIS, 129V4 Runnel street,
Portland. Oregon.
Great Discovery.
"Some of the grandest discoveries
of the ages," said the great scientist,
sonorously, "have been the result of
accidents."
"I can readily believe that," said
the fair lady. "I once made one that
way myself."
The great man blinked his amaze
ment. "May I ask what it was?"
"Certainly," answered the fair one.
"I found that by keeping a bottle of
Ink handy you can use a fountain pen
just like any other pen without all
the trouble of filling it." Christian
Register.
Lumber, Shingles,
Lath, Moulding,
Doors, Windows and
other Building Ma
terial from
SamConnell
Lumber Co.
Portland, Oregon.
Send us a list of what you require
for your buildings and we will name
you prices delivered at your station
and Guarantee to save you Money.
Pained His Thrifty Soul.
"Ye'll excuse me, captain," said
O'Harrity, addressing the commander
of the battleship, "but is ut thrue that
ut costs sivin hundred dollars to fire
wan o' thim big guns?"
"Yes, O'Harrity," said, the captain.
"Why do you ask?"
"01 fought 01 might save yez some
money, sorr," said O'Harrity. "Sure,
and Oi'll fire 'em for yez for tin."
New York Ttlmes.
WRITF STARIFSI For Moving Pictures. Pro-
niuiL aiuniu: duceni pay (rom to $100
each for Photoplays. Interesting and fascinating.
No experience necessary. Work in spare time.
Full particulars Free. Purack Specialty Co., S28
Chamber of Commerce, Portland, Ore.
Born Diplomat.
"Harry, I am beginning to believe
the baby looks like you."
"Are you, dear?"
"Yes, I notice it more and more
every day. I'm so glad."
"Do you really want him to look
like me?"
"Of course I do. I've been sorry
ever since we had him christened that
we didn't give him your name."
"Sweetheart, you dou't know how
happy you make me by saying that."
"And, Harry dear, I found the love
liest hat today. I don't believe I ever
saw anything that was so becoming
to me. It's 25. Do you think I ought
to pay that much for a hat?"
A Superfluous Question.
"In that new servant girl," said Mr.
Testy, as he discovered the sugar in
the salt shaker, "it seems to me you
have found the possessor of stupidity
in its unadulterated double distilled
form. May I ask where you obtained
her?"
"Why," replied Mrs. Testy, "at the
intelligence office, of course." Judge.
C Gee Wo
Successful Horn
Remedies
Hit successful herb
al remedies cure all
kinds of ailments of
men and women with
out operation, used
from the wonderful
Chinese herbs, roots.
buds and vegetables, which are unknown to
the medical science of this country
Write for blank and circulars. Send stamp.
CONSULTATION FREE. Address
Hie C. Gee Wo Chinese Medicine Co.
16214 First St., Portland. Ore.
Mention Paper.
1,1 "WsL' ' -1
A POSITION FOR YOU TRAINED
Oor graduates are always In demand. There Is a good position ready for yon Jnat
as soon as you can prepare for It HOLM Ik, Training means MONEY, POSITION,
POWER. There are
B227 REASONS WHY TOU gITOl'I,D ATTEND IIOLMR3
Eight thousand two hundred twenty-eeven satisfied students
hsve passed through HOLMES during the past twenty-eight
years. Hundreds of them are now successful business men with
independent incomea. Our graduates start at aalaries ranging
from $40 tot 100 a month. Write for catalogues Start NOW.
Elate 1S87.
Holmes Business College
"Tht School that gets you a good position." Wuaiaflas at Testa, Fortius', Or.
MEN'S AND WOMEN'S
Shoes $2B $3g
ALL STYLES AND ALL SIZES
We also carry a complete line
Men's Work Shoes,
Royal Shoe Co.
229 Morrison Street,
Between frst and Second 5U. PORTLAND, OREGON
You Can Get Rid of
That Itching Rash
There is Immediate relief for skins
itching, burning and disfigured by
eczema, ringworm, or similar torment
ing skin-trouble, in a warm bath with
Resinol Soap and a simple application
of Resinol Ointment. The soothing,
healing Resinol medication sinks right
IntO the Skin. Stfins itphinp' InetonHv
and soon clears away all trace of erupl
uuu, even in severe and stubborn
cases where other treatments have
hadno effect. After, that, the regular
use of Resinol Soap is usually enough
to keep the skin clear and healthy.
You need never hesitate to use Resi
nol. It is a doctor's prescription that
has been used by other physicians for
years In the treatment of all sorts of
skin affections. It contains absolute
ly nothing that could injure the ten
derest skin. Every druggist sells Res
inol Ointment and Resinol Soap.
The Light That Failed.
The audience held their breath and
simply thr-r-r-illed as Jack Bravehoy,
the hero, killed the last of the Indians.
He staggered- about; he almost
fainted with loss of blood.
Then he gazed about him, and sud
denly his voice rang out with hope:
"See!" he cried. "The dawn breaks
bright upon yon topmost heights!"
The stage remained in darkness.
"See!" he yelled again. "The dawn
breaks bright upon yon .topmost
heights!"
Still darkness reigned.
"The dawn! The dawn!" he scream
ed, raging about the stage. "It breaks,
The dawn."
A head popped over the mountain
top:
'"Old 'ard, guv-nor!" said the head.
"Don't be in sich a bloomin' 'urry!
Some one's bin an' turned the gas
off!" Tit-Bits.
KiUHS PflrlfaffOC. Our pnekaro contains 88 pieces
Allldj TdbUdgtlo 0( Christmas and holiday nov
elties, Including post cards, folderB, gift cards,
stickers, tags, seals and cutouts, making a repre
sentative package which is a rare value at 10c.
Jackson & Co., 328 Cham, of Com., Portland, Ore.
Bravery.
The teacher had been reading to
the class about the heroes of ancient
times.
"Can any boy in the class tell of a
deed of daring performed by one of
his acquaintances?" Bhe asked as she
closed the book.
Raymond's hand shot up.
"Well, Raymond."
"I saw the first baseman of our
team give the big bootblack on the
corner a wallop on 'the jaw."
So To Speak.
"How's that young man I see calling
on you lately?"
"He's a pill, but he brings me lots
of candy."
"Trying to sugar-coat himself, as it
were." Louisville Courier-Journal.
K Cures While You Walk.
Allen's Foot-Ease Is a certain curator hot,
sweating, call us, and swollen, aching feet. Sold
by al Druggists. Price 25c. Uon't accept any
iubstltute. Trial package FREE. Aodrea,
AllenS.01msted,LeItoy,N. y. "
Paw's Version.
Willie Paw, is it proper to say that
a man was given in marriage?
Paw No, my son. A girl is given
In marriage. The man always gets
sold.
Maw Willie, you go out in the back
yard and stay there. Milwaukee Sen
tinel. HOWARD E. BURTUH - Mayer, anS demist,
Leadville, Colorado. Sponimen prices! Gold,
eilier. Lend. (1. Geld, Silver, 15o; Gold. 60c; Zino
or Copper. It Mnlllag enrelopes aid full price list
sent on application. Control and Umpire work so
UoItadT Iloferenoei Carbonate National Bank. .
His Vocation Clear.
Young Arthur, the pride of his Bea
con street home, had been attending
school all of six weeks, and his devot
ed parent thought it was high time he
should find out how things were run
ning. So he asked one afternoon:
"And what did my little son learn
about this morning?"
"Oh, a mouse. Miss Wilcox told us
all about mouses."
"That's the boy.' Now, how do you
pell mouse?"
It was then that Arthur gave prom
ise of entering the diplomatic service.
He paused meditatively for a moment,
then said:
"Father, I guess I was wrong. It
wasn't a mouse teacher was telling
us about; it was a rat."
Dr. Pierce's Pellets, small, sugar
coated, easy to take as candy, regulate
and invigorate stomach, liver and bow
els and cure constipation.
No Worse.
"Say, old man, lend me ten dollars,
will you?"
"Why should I? You'd only buy
whisky with it."
"What if I do? You subscribed to
the war loan, didn't you?"
"I don't see what that's got to do
with it."
"Do you think it's any worse to lend
me money to buy whisky with than to
lend money to the allies to spend on
guns and ammunition?"
An Ingenious Soul.
Blithers entered the dining room
with a pair of yellow automobile gog
gles on.
"Hello, Blithers," said little Binks.
"Going motoring?"
"No," said Blithers. "I'm sort of
hungry for a grapefruit, and I want to
keep the juice out of my eye."
Blame the Elephant.
Customer (annoyed) I wish to re
turn the paper-cutter. It la not ivory,
as represented.
Clerk Not ivory, madam? I can't
understand that, unless the elephant
had false teeth, Boston Transcript
of High Tops, Loggers' and
at Cut Rat Prices.
l'-.'.-.-'"1
LJ
RUINEDJYTHE VI
Famous Russian Watering Place
Is Deserted.
Jalta, Known All Over the World for
Its Marvelous Climate, Hat Had
Practically No Visitors
This Season.
"Jalta, the Newport of Russia, to
which even such favored regions of
the world as the garden lands of Call
fornia and the Riviera must yield
when climates are compared, Is today
a stronghold of ..ociety utterly
eclipsed by war, a lonely, unvlsited
little village whose prestige and fame
have departed overnight, a Newport
untenanted, forgotten by the press
and by all the people who, In peace
times, eagerly read about all the so
cial splendors there," begins a state
ment given out by the National Geo
graphic society.
Jalta, normally, would Just be on-
tering upon the height of its season,
its gayest, most important two months
of the year, had not a world war
closed It, together with Monte Carlo,
Karlsbad, Interlaken and scores of
other places of 'good-tone,' beauty and
amusement. The imperial court, the
statesmen, diplomats and members of
the great Russian command, now car
rying the intolerable burdens of the
war, would be gathered there in times
of quiet, and social Russia would fol
low their course.
'Jalta Is a beautiful place built on
the shelf of a mountain whose foot
bathes in the bluest and mildest of wa
ters to be found all around the coast
of the Black sea. This little seaport,
In the government -of Taurida, on the
southern coast of Crimea, thoroughly
deserves the distinction of being the
vacation home of celebrities.
"Behind it and between it and the
north the solid mountain greens,
which merge Into deeper and deeper
shades until at the bare summits they
are greenish brown, rise to heights of
from 2,500 to 3,000 feet. These are
the southern fringe of the Jaila moun
tains. The tops of these peaks are
often covered in icy mists while in
Jalta and on its bay rests the mildest
of spring weather. Snow never 'alls
in Jalta, which boasts an annual mean
temperature of 66 degreees Fahren
heit. Its climate Is said to be supe
rior to that of Nice. Its summers
are not so oppressively hot, there Is
less rain In autumn and winter, the
cool is leBs crisp in winter and the
sunshine of autumn is said to fall
balmier than anywhere else In the
world.
"There IS'no industry and little
trade carried on by th people of the
village, who !ive almost entirely by
catering to vacationists and regular
visitors. It has a population of 14,
000. It Is an ancient city and .8
thought to have been a place of great
importance in a remote past. At one
time it belonged to the patriarchs of
Constantinople.", . ' ,, .
World's Pencil Production.
According to a recent article by Mr.
H. S. Sackett of the forest service, the
world's production of lead pencils
probably amounts to 2,000,000,000 a
year, half of which are made from
American-grown cedar. The United
States makes about 750,000,000 a
year, or more than eight pencils tor
each of its Inhabitants.
Owing to the growing scarcity of
red cedar and the fact that many other
trees now little used appear to be
more or less valuable substitutes for
that wood In pencilmaklng, the forest
service has carried out a series of
tests which show that, next to the
two species heretofore used for this
purpose, the best trees for pencils
are, in Order of merit, Rocky Moun
tain red cedar, big tree (Sequoia), Port
Orford cedar, redwood and alligator
Juniper.
Vital Statistics of Australia.
Australia's male population Is
shown by registration figures to be
as fellows: Citizen soldiers,. eighteen
to twenty-six, number 336,000; be
tween eighteen and thirty-live they
number 330,000, while the number li
able for mobilization between thirty-
five and sixty Is 614,000, or a total of
1,310,000. While 100,000 mon have
enlisted there will still be 596,000
available between the ages of eight
een and thirty-five, loss the medically
unfit. About 70 per cent of the cltl
zen forces, according to the latest fig
ures, are physically St. The est!
mate of the male population between
eighteen and forty-nine Is approxi
mately 1,000,000, and of these based
upon the results of the citizen forces,
700,000 would bo medically fit for ac
tive service in the Jeld.
Seize Much Opium.
Acting on a tip that a large quan
tity of opium had been transferred
from the S. S. Korea when It was in
Hong Kong, the federal authorities
gave the Chlyo Maru one of the most
thorough searches a liner has beon
subjected to In San Francisco. Thirty
inspectors were put to work, and went
from stem to stern, from top to bob
torn, and found about $2,500 worth of
the contraband drug. An inspector
found In a cbest belonging to Loo
Wing a false side, which opened when
one of the screws In the lock was
pressed. In this false side $600 worth
of opium was found. It Is said that
more opium is finding its way into
the country than ever before.
War Wedding Rings.
English girls becoming engaged to
soldiers make a special point of ac
quiring out-of-the-common engagement
rings. These bave been very success
fully and artistically mado from the
bands of shells melted down and Inset
with the prospective wearer's favor
ite stone. On the Inside is inscribed
the day on which the fragment was
originally picked up, and a few par
ticulars. Shell bands are also made
up Into brooches and bracelets. War
brides have a fancy for rather wide
wedding rings, and for the momont
the smaller size, the popular one be
fore last August, i I" the background
-Tit-Bits.
To Cool a Bum
and Take
the Fire Ou
B Prepared
For
Accidents
A HowhoU RtmaJy
HAN FORD S
Balsam of Myrrh
AllNIMINT
For Cuts, Burns,
Bruises. Sprains.
Strains, Stiff Neck,
Chilblains. Lame Back,
Old Sores. Open Wounds,
and all External Injuries.
Made Since 1846.
Price 25c, 60c and $1.00
is OR WRITE
A I Dea firs -c-H(n,ord M,- c&
fall SYRACUSE, N. T.
Speaking Softly.
A Virginia farmer was driving a re
fractory cow down the road, and cow
and driver came to a cross road. The
man wanted the cow to go straight
ahead, but the cow picked out the
cross road. A colored man was com
ing along the cross road.
"Haid her off! Haid her off!"
yelled the driver.
"I's trying ter!" replied the colored
man.
"Speak to her! Speak to her, and
she'll stop!"
"Good mawnin,' cow good mawn
in'!" said the other, politely. Pitts
burgh Chronicle Telegraph.
TOO MANY CHILDREN
are under-size, tinder-weight
with pinched faces and poor blood ; they
do not complain but appetite lags, they
have no ambition and do not progress.
Such children need the rich medicinal
nourishment in Scoff's- Emultion above
everything else ; its pure cod liver oil con
tains nature's own blood-forming, flesh
building fats which quickly show in roey
cheeks, better appetite, firm flesh and
sturdy frames.
If your children are languid, tired
when rising, catch cold easily or find
their studies difficult, give them Seoff'i
Emultion; it supplies the very food ele
ments that their systems lack.
Seott't Emultion contains no alcohol
and is so good for growing children it's a
pity to keep it from them.
U-47 - Scott &Bowne. Bloomfield, N.I.
Beauty and Wealth ItSnSSSS
attain both. Full instructions. Bcorei of valuable
formulas. Beautify yourself. Start a Beauty
Shop. Start manufacturing Beauty Specialties.
All of these opportunities are open to you. Com
plete system $1.00 per copy. Particulars FREE.
rurack specialty u a Cham. Uom., Portland
BMXkiaplit StmtTtatf
TiliiraBhy-liaUtf
!1 t ntfastes NOW la Siaks
2.5SS other! la leas pwltless
11 CIS Mceslr-lSl Ifidtarf
Ceniacatesoalctraiilaajaa,
auways a aeeiuaa far
IM wnea competent.
Theory and Practice.
She talks of great musicians
And of knowledge makes a show
Till she leaves you with suspicions
That your taste Is very low.
But when she sings for pleasure
' On an idle afternoon
She will hum a reckless measure
From the latest ragtime tune.
Of the drama she discourses
With an erudition vast;
She'll describe its classic sources
In the dim poetic past,
But when for sheer diversion
Unobserved she means to go,
She sets out on an excursion
To the nearest movie show.
: Washington Star,
More Than a Hint.
He was a shy young man. For two
long years he had been paying her
attention and had not yet even squeez
ed her hand.
One evening as they lingered in the
shadow of the trees by her gate he
asked timidly:
"Florence, would you might I er
would you mind if I placed one rev
erent kiss on your fair hand tonight
when I leave you? '
Florence thought he wanted speed
ing up. So she dropped her head coy-
ly on his shoulders, lifted her face
temptingly to his and replied:
"Well, George, I should think it de
cidedly out 0 place."
H
H H H
THIS LETTER STANDS FOR H
H
OSTETTER'S H
FDR HVFR firt VFARC. WFI I
KNOWN AS A "FIRST AID" H
TO 11
Health h
APPETITE POOR? u
DIGESTION BAD? il
BOWELS CLOGGED?
YOU SHOULD TRY
IPTOSTETTER'S
STOMACH BITTERS
r. n. u.
No. 47, Ittl
TCHZN rrlUag U Utrnti-O. (iaaM aa(a
" tail ajafar.
la rrLfA
-af X. 1
w
am
TRUE FRIENDSHIP OF YOUTH
Engages Gamekeeper In Long Chase
That His Companion, Without
Permit, Might Escape.
Two boys, one the possessor of a
permit, were fishing on a certain es
tate when a gamekeeper suddenly
darted from a thicket. The lad with
the permit uttered a cry of fright,
dropped his rod and ran off at lop
speed. The gamekeeper was led a
swift chase. Then, worn out, the boy
halted. The man seized him by the
arm and Bald between pants:
'Have you a permit to Ssh on this
estate?"
'Yes, to be sure," said the boy,
quietly.
"You have? Then show it to me."
The boy drew the. permit from his
pocket. The man examined it and
frowned in perplexity and anger.
"Why did you run when you had
this permit?" he asked.
"To let the other boy get away,"
was the reply. "He didn't have
none!" Pittsburgh Chronicle-Telegraph.
Obliging.
The hotel keeper, hearing of the
whereabouts of a guest who had de
camped from the hotel without going
through the formality of paying hla
bill, Rent him a note:
"Mr. . Dear Sir: Would you
send the amount of your bill and
oblige?" etc
To which the delinquent replied:
"The amount Is $13. Yours respect
fully."
The Relationship.
Mrs. Swiftly and her former hus
band were still friends. Noting the
similarity of names and their familiar
manner toward each other, a lady who
was a guest with them at a week-end
party thought they must be cousins.
'Is Mr. Swiftly a connection of
yours?" she asked.
"No," laughed Mrs. Swiftly. "A dis
connection." Judge.
Distribution.
"The question of distribution is one
of the most serious of our time," re
marked the ponderous man.
"It is," replied Miss Cayenne.
"There is no telling what may happen
to the simplest statement of Innocent
fact after It has been passed around
by gossips."
ON THE BORDER.
The Mexican Why are you here?
The American Soldier We're here
because we're here!
Preliminary Discussion.
"I offered her my hand," said the
young man.
"Did she accept It?"
"Not exactly. She's a bridge player
and what she expects of me as a part
ner is to lay my hand on the table and
be a dummy."
Early Indication.
"Doesn't that youngster of yours
toe-in a little when he tries to stand
up?"
"Yes," replied the fond father. "We
bave great hopes of him. It looks
to me as if be were naturally built
for an expert golf player."
Presumption.
"Those new neighbors have very
presumptuous children," said he.
"Yes," replied she. "They think
they bave a perfect right to get out
In the street and make as much noise
as ours do."
The Resemblance.
"There is a great likeness between
s glad telegram and a Japanese sui
cide."
"What might It be?"
"The telegram is also a happy dis
patch." Magnifying Powers.
"Father," said the small boy "what
Is a demagogue?"
"A demagogue my son, is a barker
who can make a passing crowd believe
that a sideshow Is bigger than the
main exhibition."
A Yesrnlng for Poverty.
"Does wealth bring happiness?"
"I'm not sure," replied Mr. Cumrox.
"There are times when 1 wish mjr fam
ily didn't bare the price of a box at s
Wagnerian opera."
. aSW 1 . S T- V
1lP
(u
The Best at Any Price
No other baking
powder will raise
nicer, lighter bis
cuits, cakes and
pastry, none is more
pure and wholesome
Then Why
Story Tellers.
"Do you find that set of books you
bought Interesting?"
"Not very," confessed the man who
tries to improve himself. -
"Do you regret your bargain?"
"A little. I'd feel better about it if
the man who comes around to collect
the cash were as good at telling a
funny yarn as the one who sold me the
book." .':,-.!
Always a Chance. i '
"Why don't you get married, old
top?"
"Can't find any girl willing to leave
her happy home for me."
"Then why not look around for some
girl with an unhappy home?" Louis
ville Courier-Journal.
At the Ball Game.
Mrs. Dents (excitedly) Isn't our
pitcher perfectly grand, Tyrus? He
hits the club nearly every throw.
Joplln Times.
Kill It.
"Walter, take this egg away."
"Yes, sir, and what would you like
me to do with It, sir?"
"Do with it? Wring its neck."
Passing Show.
SMOKELESS POWDER SHELLS
Carefully inspected shells, the best com
binations of powder, shot and wadding:,
loaded by. machines, which give invariable
results are responsible for the superiority
of Winchester "Repeater" Factory Loaded
Smokeless Powder Shotgun Shells. There
is no guesswork in loading them. Reliability,
velocity, pattern and penetration are de
termined by scientific apparatus and practical
experiments. Do you shoot them ? They are
SATISFACTORY
You Can't Feaze Paw.
"Popper!"
"Well, what is it, son?"
"Where do they keep the street car
at night, when it ain't running?"
"Oh, in a barn."
"In a barn, like a horse? Why,
what do they feed it on?"
"Oh, currents."
Lat us tall you FREE of 24 new ways to Risks
money. It may be the beginning of financial In
dependence. Address. Purack Specialty Co., 128
Chamber of Commerce, Portland, On,
Not Driven, Coaxed. '
"I understand that you have a new
motor car."
"Yes."
"Do you drive it yourself?"
"Nobody drives it. We coax It."
Washington Star.
She Didn't Like It.
"So Miss Passay is angry with her
doctor. Why Is that?"
"He tactlessly remarked that he
would have her looking her old self
again." Boston Transcript.
Mm
sewer if closed up. All life consists of building up and tearing
down and just in the same manner that the blood carries to the
various parts of the body the food that the cells need for building
up, so it is compelled to carry away the waste material that's torn
down. These waste materials are poisonous and destroy us unless
the liver and kidneys are stimulated into refreshed and vigorous life.
DR. PIERCE'S Golden Medical Discovery
is the balancing power a vitalizing power. It acts on the stomach
and organs of digestion and nutrition on the purifying Alters which
clean the blood. Thus fresh vitalized blood feeds the nerves, heart
and brain. This well known altorative relieves catarrh of the stomach and
iieadach.es accompanying same, and has been successful for more than a gen
eration as a tonic and body-builder. It builda up the rundown system. You
seed it if you are always "catching cold" or have catarrh of the nose and
throat. The active medicinal principle of Americaa-Native-roots are
sHiractea wimout alcohol and you can obtain this
tonic in liquid or tablet form at any drug store or
send 60 cents io 1-ccnt stamps for trial box of tablet.
5enf 31 one-rent ramps fo pay toil at mailing ana?
wrapping for from copy of Tha common Sense Mtdieai
Ado, nr. by Dr. V. M. Pimrea, elath boanj. IOOO
fwges, Addrm INVALIDS' 110 ILL, Uullilo.ti.t.
Needed a Cure.
"Mr, Jones, you will either have to
marry at once or leave our employ."
"But why are you so anxious that
I marry?"
"While you aro In love you do not
half attend to your duties, and you
must either be cured or fired."
Houston Post.
In Practice.
Hobson I never in all my life saw
a man who could so readily guess rid
dles and conundrums as that Henry
Peck,
Dobson No wonder! Just think of
the practice he has. Ills wife keeps
him guessing all the time, Puck.
Mistaken.
Fat And you alBO said I hadn't the
manners of a hog.
Lean Oh, no I didn't. I said you
had. Philadelphia Evening Ledger.
Not
Cray
Hairs
bat tired
Kyee
Make
us look
older
than we
are.
Old age
and Dull
fcyee
tell-isle.
Doritlell
Marls
Ifa lesudy Oemsaay, Oalsate. teaes tee f tae tye aeeajHaest.
If
Pay More?
The Old and Reliable
Or. Isaac Tnompson s
EYEWAtER
la both a remedy for weak, Inflamed
eyea and an ideal eye wash. Keep
ym cju wtll aid titer wlLI help keep yon.
r 9C-i.JI fautitt w tea-ly
JC Ml mwpl if price,
WRITE FOR FREE BOOKLET
JOHN L. THOMPSON SONS & CO.
He Knew.
The teacher was giving the geogra
phy class a lesson on the cattle
ranches. She spoke of their beef ail
coming from the west, and, wishing
to test the children's observation, she
asked:
"And what else comes to us from
these ranches?"
That was a poser. She looked at
her shoes, but no one took the hint.
She tried again.
"What do we get from the cattle be
sides beef?"
One boy -eagerly raised his hand.
"I know what it is. It's tripe!" he
answered, triumphantly. The Youth's
Companion,
MU;, 1 '
Repeater"
SHELLS TO SHOOT
TYPHOID
b no mora naceuar
thanSmallpox. Aran?
experience bu demonstrated
the almost miraculous erfl
Sacy, and harmleisnen, of Antityphoid Vaccination. ,
Be vaccinated NOW by your physician, you and
fair family. It is more Yltsl thsn hours insursnce.
Ask your physiclsn, druggist, or send for Have
oil had Typhoid?" telling of Typhoid Vaccina,
results from use, end dsnger from Typhoid Carriers.
THC CUTTtl LA50BATOBY, BCMCUY, CAU
MoaucjN yacciass a sssuas usssi . s, son. ucsasa
Remembered, But Not Paid
Broad By the way, old man, do yon
remember borrowing $10 from me six
months ago?
Short Yes.
Broad But you said you only want
ed it for a short time.
Short And I told the trutb. I did
n't keep it 20 minutes.
Correct.
"What is one of the characteristics
of the Indian race?" asked an Instruc
tor in city college.
"They play football to beat the
band," replied a former De Witt Clin
ton boy.
Is the canal of life but it becomes a
Does So.
"Here's a startling item."
"What is it?"
"It says the oyster has not increas
ed in price In 25 years."
"Hum. Looks like culpable negli
gence somewhere." Kansas City
Journal.
Same Tone.
"Oh, mamma, the lady next door has
a trained monkey, and when It doesn't
behave you better believe she gives it
a good talking to; and say, mamma"
"Yes, my child."
"It sounds Just like when you're
talking to daddy."
Some Class.
"Where did you get all the second
hand furniture, old man?"
"Those things are not secondhand.
They're genuine antiques,"
-V
After the
Movies
go home
and
Murine
your "iyee,
Two
Drops
will real,
end
cleans.
Have)
handy.
if