LET L'S ALL LAUGH.
Eugene Weekly Guard
•
has advanced in an astounding degree.
Never before in the history of the
world has the noble ateed reached such
a high development More attention
is paid to-day to tine points In breed­
ing than ever before. Not alone is this
BUGINE
true of racing and fancy breeds, but
also of draught animals. It is natural
Taking too much liberty may deprive for man to love the horse and it is
a man of his liberty.
natural for the horse to love man.
7
/■
Ml
e.
Opinions of Great Papers on Important Subjects.
4
JOKES FROM THE PENS OF VA-
RIÜUo HUMORISTS.
Pteascnt
Inc.dent»
World Over
Occurring
th*
>uy auga that Are Cheer­
ful to old or Youug —Fuuuy belec-
tioua thut You Will Eujoy.
"What is y(>ur »avor'^’t,—
cd the man who was writ
about captain* of indu««'11*
Man wailtH but
n.
low.’” replied Mr i,...,,
“I* that—er-un
ate sentiment for a
T **
biuations?”
1 ‘Uot‘‘ru((
"No. I don’t take it r«..
• intended to apply
low*.”-washingt„u
Like pretty much everything else
The child Is father to the man and
"How o!d is Charlie Huggins, daugh­
••n
.
tir,,,uni«r
the college graduate Is his grandfather. the matter of having children ha* two
Do not wy you
•
ter?” asked old mnn Bitkins at the
Ì
sides to It, say* the Saturday Evening
dear. Say 'broken.' "
* '
breakfast table the other morning.
If Mexico has any more men like I’oat. A* a great many children are
“People would think I
"lie'» 24. I believe," replied the fair
Diaz it should begin to economise on failures, and as children are the Joint
—Cincinnati Tribune.
before. With the last decade a number of occupation, have maid. "But why do you ask?”
them.
product of heredity and environment,
Banish Hallowe’en Mal ciouvne»».
“
Oh.
your
mother
and
I
were
only
opened up to them for the first time.
Awful t»iieninifc
both elements preponderantly under
Not only 1* the demand greater than before, but the wondering,” answered the father, with
N one sense, Halloween and the Fourth of
Children are the light of the home, parental control. It would seem more
"O. Aunt Rachel.
»«Tibie
«lïer^tire^
the suspicion of a twinkle in his most
July are alike. Both days give license for supply I* smaller. The very prosperity that has
but sometimes they should be turned sensible to say that there were too
the sJrvant-keeplng class has enabled poorer people e her off optic. 'We gathered from what we liea rd
almost
unlimited
lawlessness.
On
the
Fourth
down.
many people undertaking parental re­
gunpowder reigns supreme over the law; on to maintain their daughters at home or send them toh«.l overheard of bis conversation in the
"What Is the matter Beet,
The most successful lawyers now sponsibility instead of too few. And
Halloween all sorts of mischief hold sway, and many girls who In 1893 would have been seeking pla« es parlor last night that he was in his
"The Janitor of the brnj’,
further, parentalhood has many cares
are ones who can keep their clients out
often resulting in heavy property loss and are now living In ease on the abundant earning* of their second childhood.”
to marry our Amelia
! 1
and
sorrows
and
exasperations.
Still,
of court
bloodshed. The murder of the chief of police fathers ami brothers. Statistics on this jtolnt are not avail­
the sight of him-but how J?’1
when all Is said, bow many peruon*
Fair Play.
of Morgan Park emphasizes the Halloween evil.
able. but the facts are patent It Is plain, also, that etn-
Edmonia—Have you any rules In dare to run the risk of
The Italian government finds that it who found themselves childless at 45
Halloween, as a feature of American life, deserves to ployinent at good wage« has allowed many young median-
—Chicago Tribune.
41,1
has a surplus of $13,<M)(>.000 on hand. have been able honestly to congratu­
your married life?
be laid to rest. There Is no reason why one day in the year les to marry, and has thus transformed possible house­
Italy's grafters must be new and Lu- late themselves? Children have a use
Euslaeln—Yes; Eustace Insists that
as an assurance against destitution should be set apart for the perpetration of malicious mis maids into actual wives. The “steady company has been tlie one who begins the quarrel must
experienced hands.
“Can you
chief.
On
Halloween
hundreds
of
thousands
of
youths,
much
in
evidence,
and
bls
attentions
have
still
further
- J put two andn,,
and loneliness In old age. They are
begin the making up.
get her?”
and
often
grown
perse,ns,
turn
their
attention
to
damaging
disturbed
our
domestic
economy.
—
New
York
Evening
I
ost.
If it comes to a test, Russila is much satisfactory to the vanity for family
"Not so » ~
other people’s property. During the rest of the year these
well as one and 0Bi;p
Art und Nature.
less likely to fall on her knees and sue immortality. But more than these and
minister.”
persons
are
generally
law-abiding.
They
have
no
thought
for peace than to fall on the Japanese all other advantages is the advantage of destroying fences or sidewalks, daubing paint on houses,
Refuse to Scare.
of prolonging one’s life. Growing chil­
and hold the piece she already has.
Achievement.
HE statisticians are beginning to frighten us
or carrying off whatever they can find loose. On Halloween
Briggs—Well, old Ulall> ¡
dren will keep any proper man or
about
the
consumption
of
iron.
They
say
that
they regard these depredations as strictly legitimate.
ok the world in the fac
The conscience funds are constantly woman young in spirit and in mind,
30.OQO.000 tons of ore was taken out of the
In Morgan Park a married woman, colored, dressed her­
fot* are n« 1.1
receiving contributions of about 30 will retard the development of that
ground in this country alone last year, and as
self in the clothes of a man and proceeded to play havoc
cents, but we rarely hear of the large sour yet complacent cynicism which
y°u do It?
the world grows older, and its inhabitants more
with a sidewalk. She was discovered by the chief of police
robbers who disgorge a million dol- curses old age both for one’s self and
and struck with a cane. A rash and quick tempered negro
numerous, the demand for iron must increase
Ing the money.
for those about one. The man or
lure or a railroad.
avenged the blow by cutting the throat of the chief.
until the'end of the supply is reached, and then what will
woman-again, the right sort of man
This killing illustrates the Halloween extreme, but all they do, poor things, who are on earth In that remote day.
T wo of Them
The time is rapidly approaching or woman—who has children drinks over the country minor acts of despoliation took place,
Nell—I can't Imagine any on»,
We do not scare very readily over the prospect of the
when one half of the world will be every day a deep draught at the foun­
which in the aggregate amounted to heavy loss. It is to be failure of the world's resource* in any direction. When
foolish than she is. she bu
in the madhouse and the other half tain of eternal youth.
hoped that the coming generation of boys will be educated it gets *o that human being* cannot exist on earth they
married him to reform him,
outside, and then the tug of war will
out of the Halloween Idea.—Chicago Journal.
Ned—Huh, he's Just as foo|tv
will
probably
cease
to
move
on
the
planet,
but
It
leemi
New
The
demonstration
before
the
be to see which half is sane.
seems to have married her qm
as if the generation living had much more occasion to be
York Microscopical Society that lazi-
give her a chance to learn rm
concerned about its own comfort, and wisdom, and virtue,
A Turkish artist who drew a carica­ ness is a disease caused by the insid­
Money vs. faith in The Pulpit.
They
’re keeping house, you fa>
than
about
the
prospects
of
health
and
happiness
of
those
ious
germ
known
a*
hookworm,
anky-
ture of the Sultan has been sentencixl
NE of the questions that caused the most anx­
Philadelphia Press.
to 101 years in prison. We have no llstomm, duodenale, and uncinariasis,
ious Interest at a recent annual church con­ who may dwell in some distant period.
This fear of what is going to happen to some one after
doubt, however, that he may succeed will no doubt set many people pitying
vention in Michigan was the cause of the clos­
Heard in ■ Garret
through good conduct in having it themselves. Ruth McEnery Stuart, in
ing of churches in half a dozen cities and towns our end has been common with humanity for many centu­
“I want a hero for a new r.
one
of
her
inimitable
Southern
sketch
­
marked down to 99.
In the State. The explanation was that young ries. Predictions of the coming to the end of the world it­
said the author.
es, tells the story of a negro who de­
men are not attracted by the idea of spending self are numberless, and the prophets are still working
"Let me see,” said a friend s
“
I
have
here,"
announces
the
poet,
According to one of the scientific clares hluiself to have been “marked
$1,000 or $2,000 for an education to fit them­ overtime on that problem, but until the earth itself has “a parody on 'When the Frost is on pose you take a man who has J
for
rest,
”
and
who
acts
on
that
theory
Journals more than 8,000,000 of the
selves whose financial rewards run from $700 to $1,000 a been entirely looked over and Its treasures estimated at the Pumpkin and the Fodder’s in the your books?”—Exchange.
13,500,000 people of Mexico do not all his life, while his wife supports year, where other callings offer much brighter prospects at their trtie bulk there 1* no need of any one being alarmed
Shock.’ ”
Same Old story.
work. No wonder some of the Mexi­ him and the rest of the family. Oth­ a less outlay of time nml money for technical training.
for fear of a fatal scarcity of anything necessary to human
"But.” protests the editor, “you sold The good old summer time
cans are opposed to having Yankee er* who like to sloip work better than
It Is rather discouraging if the financial consideration happiness or human existence.—Buffalo News.
us a parody on the same thing last
Soon on the ice we'll slide; "
to begin It, but who have not been
ideas introduced into that country.
is sufficient to deter young men who feel that they had a
fall.”
able to excuse laziness as anything
And
the man who used tos«s
vocation for the ministry. A faith which begets no devo­
Reform in China.
"True,” acknowledges the poet, “but
door
Camilla's alarm for fear that En­ more than habit, will proliably utilize tion superior to material gain, that inspires no spirit of
HE man who cries for reform in China takes the pumpkin has been frosted again
gland may give away still more of her the loophole offered by the New York sacrifice and personal consecration, lacks something that '*
Will leave it open wide.
bis life in his hand. A century ago the Japa­ this fall."
territory seems hardly Justified.
It microscopists. No doubt the lazy necessary to the growth of a religion.
Hi« ConfeaHion,
"Far
be
it
from
me
to
differ
with
nese who bad a public grievance to complain of
has not been England's custom to let man's respect for himself wlU go up
When Heine was asked why the world built no more
Myer—I understand you arm
go of anything in the way of real amazingly, and self-pity will also be in such cathedrals as that of Cologne, he replied that cathe­
could present his petition with the assurance nature,” says the editor. “You may
reader of Action.
estate that she could reasonably bold evidence when he realizes that he i* dral builders had convictions, while moderns had only
that it would be duly considered, but he lost consider yourself duly frosted.
Gyer—Well, I never mlsi
In reality suffering from a disease, It
on to.
his
life.
The
Chinese
reformer
loses
his
life
opinions. In order to forego worldly success and comfort
Spoke from Experience.
the daily weather reports.
is to be hoped, however, that the mi-
without
effect.
And
for
some
time
past
there
has
been
a
The new reporter was fresh from
Very opportunely, a consular ri^iort croacoplats will follow up their re- and devote himself Joyfully to a life of struggle and hard­ deadly conflict between the Dowager Empress and the ex­
Hie First Conclusion.
on Beirut as a center for American searches and discover the cure for the ship. It Is necessary that a man have a very fixed convic­ ponents of reform. Only the other day a member of the college; nobody expected him to know
tion
as
to
the
vital
Importance
of
the
work
he
is
under
­
much.
trade has been issued, Iron pipes and hookworm of laziness. It Is said there
reform party was beaten to death with bamboos, while the
“Do you say ‘the newly married
sewing machines are mentioned as Is no germ without Its destroyer, Just taking. That he must be filled with fire and zeal, and that fate of others at Shanghai is hanging on the firmness of
he
must
accept
literally
and
unquestioningly
the
theory
couple goes on a short trip’ or ‘the
finding ready sale, but there is no ref- as there is no potaon without Its anti­
that the salvation of his own soul and of other souls is a the British representative. Now we learn that five others newly married couple go on a short
erence make to the market that should date, and the discovery of the nemesis
matter which wholly overshadows the trivialities of earthly have been arrested at I’ekin, and their terrible fate is, we trip?'
he was asked.
exlM for Inexpensive French guillo­ of the hookworm will simplify the
before hi* death, wrote a mov- | “ ‘Goes,’ if they start at once,” said
fear, assured. Shen Chien,
~
existence.
tines or American gallows.
world’s affairs amazingly. If all lazy
Religion diluted with rationalism does not tend to create Ing appeal to his own people and the foreign powers, “I the sporting editor, kindly, for he
people can be successfully treat«!, the enthusiasts or to foster the missionary spirit, nnd those have won but little, and my day is done.'
It is a pathetic never forgot that he was young him­
Discrimination against the Chinese dynamic force of the human race wlU
sects which adopt it must either adjust their salaries to cry from this young man of one-and-thlrty, standing—and self, once.
in Australia takes the form of laws be increas«l about 50 per cent. It Is
their own particular circumstance* or continue to find a falling—with a few against scores of millions of fellow­
regulating their hours of labor. A inspiring to think what a vast increase
Very Different.
paucity of candidates for commercially undesirable pulpits. country men bound by immemorial tradition and led by
Chinaman of Melbourne lately paid In America's Industries will occur
"Women are very different from
—
Chicago
Journal.
the
Dowager
Empress.
The
life-blood
of
many
must
run
five shillings tine, and two pounds whin all the tramps rush eagerly to
men.”
In the market place before the reformer is welcomed in
twelve (hillings costs, for working at meet the work which they now side-
“Of course they are. but what dif­
China.—London Chronicle.
half nast 8 o'clock in the evening. •tun «<> sdrolilv
ference do you wish to specify?"
The lazy ycuth of
Martyrdom of the Housewife.
"Men become members of ‘ancient’
se hardest work to-
HE difficulty of securing domestic help is not
lynching Must be StcpfR-d.
orders of this and that ami the other,
s cigarette lighted,
new. and It is not peculiar in New York. • • •
f industry, and all
E do not believe that the civilization of the but women must Joint the very newest
Some of the reasohs for the present plight are
will feel th^ reju-
United States is going to be wrecked in this organizations."
obvious. There have beeu nnd must continue
terribly.
'f the nivtl.IXxtiuwe
veuatlni
to be certain Inherent difficulties in the prob
way, but we do believe that it can be sated
Trouble« of Her Own.
Neighbor—What is she going on! Th
h-
only one danger
lem. These have often been pointed out: long
only by a combination of the sane elements of
“
I
asked
her
if
site
would
scream
!fcj
stage?
ie glowing future
and Irregular hours, confined and often lonely
»odety to assert and. If need be. to maintain by for her mother if I kissed her.”
Cause for Rejoicing.
New York mlcro- routine, varying quantities of work, vagaries and caprices
Itisi . u
wful means tlie supremacy of law. Every
“What did she say?”
“Trials of Authors!" exclaimed t
'tigators are quite of mistresses, nnd the so-called "social stigma." All these sheriff bus the power to summon a posse. The peaceable
“She said her mother was fully
pessimist, as he glanced it the nta
-bitten and become combine to draw women Into factory employment, with Its and rational majority of citizens within his Jurisdiction, if capable of doing her own
screaming.'’ paper headline. "So they h»ve t
1U1J
heir investigations to fixed hours, <>i>portunltles to be on the street In going and they should place themselves under his orders, would con­ —Houston Post.
rested some of those measly )“»ti
coming, congenial companionship while busy, definite tasks, stitute a legal force, and a force competent to restore order
trust, slayer of (KM) men, and worth
last. Gee, but I'd have liked to *
Crowded Ont.
formal rules for conduct, consistent supervision, and gen wherever It was invaded. There are some unhappy Indi
<10,000,000." The policeman who ar-
MAKING A LIVING.
“Didn't you find your new flat a on the Jury that tried 'em!"
eral Independence outside of hours of labor. • • •
cations that a state of thb-gs Is approaching for which
rented him explained that be did It on
Tliere are, however, some new factors In the reckoning such a remedy as that must be somewhat widely em­ tight squeeze?”
Pessimistic Outlook.
general principles, which shows that a Queer Avocation« Iliecloned by Fisn The demand for the work of women is keener than ever
“Yes; we’ve squeezed off a lot of
ployed.—New York Tribune.
Board« in New York.
Prospective Patron—IVliat mo
police-man may have a true sense of
company already."
Placards and sign boards In New
languages do you teach here!
the fitness of things.
*. * *- •- -*- ». -* -*-* * . .*. ■*■ -*- -S- *-
York disclose some st rang* ways of
old battered sombrero among the men flesh of which Is a delicious combina­
College President (fifty year» b(
False A’arm,
making a living.
nml women. Money, gold dust and Jew­ tion of the qualities of wild game and
—All tlie leading ones except 1
Visitors to Coney Island this year
A 1R0NTILR MISSIONARY.
J
In East Thirty-fourth street a sign
elry went Into the hat.
tame animals.
found New York's great summer recre­
llsh.
in the window of a house informs the
With an Invitation to them to come
There is a chance that before many
Prospective Patron—Except 1
ation ground a uiuch more decent place
public that "Birds are boarded there
r\
to
the
new
chnrch.
the
preacher
with
­
than formerly A new company had
years the greater part of the swamp
llsh? How is that?
by
the
day,
week
or
month.
”
A
little
The
Methodist
Episcopal
Church
lt>
drew. The next morning he came with will be redeemed from its present wild­
provided many harmless amusements
College President—We hare 11
0*
in its gaily decorated Inclosure, and It further down town a sign In a base­ California recently held memorial ser a coffin that he had made with his ness into civilized farm bind; but it
doned the effort to keep up with
took so much time to enjoy them that ment window announces that "Dogs' vices for William Taylor, the first mis­ own hands during the night, and with will be many years before the bear
Our stnndnrd dictionaries now roil
none wag left for the vicious resorts ears nml tai'* are cut In the latest sionary of that church In the State. the help of several sailors properly and wild cattle and moccasin snakes
several million words—priacfc
fashion;
”
and
a
sign
in
the
same
lo
­
"He
la,"
wrote
Charles
Spurgeon,
the
burled the body of the murdered man. disai»pear from their refuges, and be­
i ilch once made the place notorious.
slang, sir; principally slang—ami :i
Everybody knows that the way to keep cality reads: "I educate cross cats famous London preacher, "the Paul of and at the same time called on the let­ fore the rare plants and birds that still
is a new one born into the lang«
the
age,
and
Ills
experiences
tn
estab
­
and
dogs
to
lie
gentle
aud
well
be
­
ter
feelings
of
his
listeners
In
the
leu-
a boy—and a man, too, for that mat­
draw botanists and ornithologists from
every minute in the day.—Ou
haved."
lishing
Methodism
on
the
frontier
of
son he drew from the crime.
ter from going wrong is to keep him
all parts of the country will lie found
Tribune.
"Young ladles are Invited to come tn America. Australia nnd South America
Fearless, kindly, of Arm faith, he only in museum show cases.
busy going rigtit; but not every one
have
no
parallel
in
church
history.
”
and
learn
the
name
and
calling
of
their
Enterprise unit Cantins-
was
the
type
of
num
to
succeed
remembers it all the time.
as a
Carrye I ptodate—Don't you dare to
future husbands." in West Twenty­
“I shall get there," quoth Euterprt
The story of William Taylor's career missionary.
TOMSON AND WIND RIVER SMITH kiss me.
| Cholly Slowboy—Why, I wasn't confidently.
The sorrow manlfivted over the third street, near Eighth avenue, In the wicked mining camps and In San
Their Argument on the Burning Sub­
people
made Francisco during the early fifties is
"»»here?” asked Caution.
IN DISMAL SWAMP.
tragic and deplorable death of Mrs. “Round-shouldered
thinking of kissing you.
ject of Indian Genealogy.
Here Enterprise bestowed a vitk
| Carrye I'ptodate—I—I thought you
Booth Tucker allows how extensive straight." is an announcement on East more thrilling than fiction. Lawless­
Hut Little Better Known Now Th an
“A ranch is like a man; it has some­ were.
ing look upon her laggard siatrt
are public sympathy and admiration Nineteenth street, and near Nineteenth ness was unbridled in the town. Mur
When Wnwhiniiton Saw It.
thing
that belongs to it, that don't be­
"As to that I know nothing. •
street
on
Fourth
avenue."perfect
grace
derm
went
without
trial.
with and for one whose life is really
Addressed to Ilins.
The name "Dismal Swamp" is a by­ long to no other ranch, same as 1 have
replied, haughtily, "further than'S
"In all my travels over the world."
unselfish. Although young In years at Is taught In twelve lessons," and "sat-
"I never heard a more disgusting in­ when Iget there It will 1 h > somevl*
word everywhere, and a legend has Just the same number of eyes and
the time of her dentil, she had had a lsfactlon guarunteed." "Beauty pads Mr. Taylor used to say. “I never have
grown up round it of a dreary, boggy, nose, and so forth, that you drew on cendiary speech than old man Brown else.”—Detroit Free Press.
seen
such
human
degradation,
such
for
thin
ladies"
may
lie
obtained
on
long career of work and service, ex­
unknown region of snakes and dark, your ticket, yet you ain't me no made this morning.”
tending practically without interrup­ the Bowery, near Houston street; and woful Immorality and recklessness of
“Who is old man Brown?”
Long-LiveJ Vsnitv.
damp
thickets, where runaway slaves niore'n I’tn you.” This was a kind I of
human
life
as
in
San
Francisco
In
tion from childhood to middle age. not far away, "ladles deficient in ward
Mrs. Chic—Your aunt Ewts*
“1 he old fellow I work for. He
fled for refuge. Frederick Street, in sober-minded concern; it was
n Mid:
The enthusiasm, the devotion, the rota- are fashionably dressed on easy, 1849."
'See here, if you don't do bet- now about 84, isn't she?
It took courage to apeak to the Frank Leslie's Popular Monthly, In thoughtful sort of a ranch, where i ev-
sympathy and the forgetfulness of self monthly Installments.”
Miss Aplomb—Oh. don’t »’»
"Sore eyes in poodles effectually ■wearing, drunken crowds who spent telling the story of this region, says erybody went about his work quiet . I ter I'll fire you!’ ’ "—Philadelphia Press.
which characterized thia life can hard­
auntie is awfully sensitive about
that It Is but little better known at guess it was largely because the boys
ly' t»e appreciated by one who merely curt'd here" is a piece of valuable in­ their time lu gambling and Intoxica­
Perverted Pride.
tlds day than It was 1.**» years ago. was mostly old timers, given to argu­
age_—Detroit Free Press.
reaita the simple r«x>rd thereof. It formation given in East Broadway. tion. Many a time he was threatened
“Aren't you ashamed of that last
when
George
Washington
himself
laid
ing
atout
why
was
this
about
and how come massacre?”
was a life gloriously Ailed with love In Catharine street "Babies are hired with personal violence. One of his
Presence of Mind.
out a route through IL
that,
of humanity and a zeal for souls—a or exchanged." and In Division street first efforts was made In Pat Donovan's
He—I understand that^yo« 1”
“I don't see why I should be." an­
The swamp Is old historically,
"Argue! Caesar! It was a regular
twofold devotion which comprehended "Old sets of artificial teeth are tsmght dance hall. A murder hail Just been
swered the sultan. “It wasn't such a be congratulated.
first settlers at Norfolk and the region dettati ng society.
pity for the wretchedneaa of this world and sold." In Hester street “Black committed. The body was hauled Into
Wind River Smith very small one."—Washington Star.
She—No. the engagement I» ”
round
alx>ut
knew
of
It
as
a
wild,
im
­
picked up a l>ook in the old man's
and a strong determination to amelio­ eyes are artfully painted over." anil fit adjoining room, nnd the drinking,
passable bit of country full of game
room that told about thè Injuns bein'
rate It so far as the spiritual welfare “false noses as good ns new and war cursing, gambling nnd dancing were
Back tn the Parlor.
He—That Is what I hoard-**
an«l of valuable timber; cypress, ao Jews away liack before the big high
of multitudes tiroides. The loss of ranted to fit" are advertised near Chat­ resuni«! as noisily as ever. Sud>lenly
The day is done,” murmured the
good
for
making
shingles;
Juniper,
ville
Journal.
water, and how one gang of 'em took sentimental maid.
■uch a worker is a calamity not only ham square, conveying the impression Mr. Taylor's stalwart frame appeared
black gum, a nd beech. In 1728 Colonel
to the prairie and the other gang to
to her faintly and the great organkia- that mayhem is not an uncommon In the door of the place.
1 hat s right," admitted the prosaic
Examination Oddim*
Byrd, while trying to establish the
the bad clothes business. Well, he and youth, "but the night is pretty raw.”
llon which they have built up but to crime in some quarters.
Catcalls and yells of derision greet«1
boundary line between Virginia and
There is no end to ,b* ”7^
the world at large, which. In pausing
In Chatham street the wayfarer Is the missionary; and one limn drew his
Cha« ley Tom*on—'member Chawley
Whereupon they both shivered and evolved in answers to school q ■
North Carolina, ran a survey across it.
reverently to note her passing, proves told: "Dine here, and yon will never pistol nnd told Mr. Taylor to get out
and hl* tooth? And you'd have time broke up the camp on the front stoop.
working with the greatest difficulty
Here are a few of recent date
that such an example as her* will not dine anywhere else." and In Mulberry or be shot. He stood quietly for a few
and making only a mile a day through to tail down and burn a steer before
under
the observation of »
end at the grave.
street an undertaker makes a bld for moments, and then Mid:
Aecret Out.
the thick growth. He it was who Chawley got the next word out—well
Tenant—Gee. but our flat is cold!
business with a sign In his window
teacher:
aa J
“1 have not come for trouble. If you named It The Dismal Swamp."
they got arguin' about whether this
“Our body I* made out of
You shouldn't
which reads
"Why walk about In will let me sing n few songs and say a
Wise-acres for fifty years have pre
I Janitor—Naturally.
IA ter surveys and government maps wns so. or whether It weren't so.
bones. Also toenails
otherwise.
"Smtthy was for the book, havin’ expect it to
dieted the doom of the horse. But the misery when I can bury you decently few words. I'm sure you won’t rrgrvt ■how that the wilderness contains
“The vein* carry unpur*
Tenant—Why not?
to”
read
It.
and
Chawley
scorned
it
The
horse la here to stay. When the swift for iisr’
about 800 square mile* of wood and
the
artlleries carry pure b
Janitor
—
Because
the
building
is
"Go
ahead!
”
some
locomotive succeeded the alow stage
one yelled. Mr. water, lying In a tract twenty miles argument lasted a month, «nd as nei­
About Corn.
••The Nile empties into tM
fire proof—see?
coach the "finish” of the horse was
Just previous to the Civil War a Taylor tirgnn to sing tn his full, dear wide ami forty-five long, and extend­ ther one of 'em knew anything «bout
apparent, to some, but It failed to ma bushel of corn represented more than voice some of the familiar church ing twenty mile* into Virginia and an InJun except what you can gather
Nlzana.”
— ;ied *
"The mouth of the NB*
8o They Both Shook Him.
taris liar
When the bicycle, to some four and one half hours of human la­ hymns. The crowd was quickly won twenty five into North Carolina The from looking at him over a rifle staht
«* wxl *« alt.» w 1v ■
• •
Darkway—Did you make love to Metterian sea
extent, displaced the apiendhl "rig.” a bor at a coat of X">\ rent*. while to­ by the music.
.,h*’
■oil i* ■ sort of rich. Mack vegetable and as the only Jew that either one • ny girls at the shore?
“Ceylon 1» in Northea
great many then thought the home day forty-one minutes of latsw pro­
“Go on!" slwuted the men when he mold, dry «nd raky at aom» season*, of 'em ever Mid two word* to was
Cleverton—Yes. One from Roxton
"The camels cross tbe
was sure to go But he la here still. duce the same amount for 101^ cents. atopjwd. Then he sang one or two
one that sold Wind River a
and saturated with water at others the
th.t melted In the first ralnstonn" Rh"q and one from New Orleans.
When the electric car superseded the
Scotch rongs. and finally, getting up on The whole region is like a huge
travelers."
___ .n(lla st*
"How was It?”
of t'ourse Not.
"The largest cities of
“dinky bob-tall" the same prediction
the platform where the fiddhr nt, be sponge, alternately dry and wet; and then him and Chawley went to town
“Did you ever have chills and cd Canton. Pekin and K<
"And you permitted that strange S|->k-' plait-* and fore bly upon the
>
was made, and even more forcibly was
•* the iwamp level, curiously enough and rn.de th.t Hebrew eat what wo.
It noised about when the erratic auto­ young man to kiss you?"
"Because India is e*
evil life his auditors were lending, and Is twenty feet above Ode-water, It Is left of the hat after refunding the fever*'—Smart Ret
"No, mamma; ha didn't give me they listen«! quietly.
mobile invaded our midst For age*,
dia the British own it
the eouree of many river* and stream« Price, you can Imagine what . eontri
c
_ B*cky.
xnd history runneth not to the con time."—Pearson's Wisely
When the preacher had reseed, a big
"China 1. where
There are deer tn the woods, but it button to history I listened to Th.?,
<
utnso
—
Well,
young
Friable
___
will pie crowd together. Abo«
trary. the horse has been man's ctoaast
It is taking an nnf*lr advantage of strapping Irishman, who had served i* th* wild cattle that glv* the best the kind of place the Ella* ranch
inak* bls way in th« medical profe«-
friend of all the animals In times of
time In prisons tn Australia and New •port. Th* am-retor* of the** "reed and a mre old farm she was too»
in that city."
«iH »
McClure's Magazine
* ,0° ~ ■lon.
l>eacv. war. commercial prosperity and a Ruxalan to aak him to pronounce his ' Zealand and had been the terror of
"The people of India
fed” cattl*. a* they are called, strayed
name when he ha* been drinking.
<
awker
—
Ha*
he
got
a
good
*tart?
In the pursuit of pleasure the noble
the water front tn San Francisco. pro In from th* field.« and hek up their
„
Mo*t women suspect there i.
* unl"0—1 ahould say be bad. He dianas.”
horse has proved bta worth. In the
Four hundred and thirteen miles vi poaed a collection for the new Marho- abode tn th* swamp. Th* result is *
-Ceylon Is In China
mischief on tap every Uwe rhe .T”* ■ 7** "tK’h *
f»*orfte in the col-
face of scientific progress th* horse | railway are to be bulU la Alaska.
dlat church, and he himself paaaad hl* rac* of »mall, active, wild cattl*. the band* smll*.
“Natives of Indi* is
I lege that they made him surgrou to
Chicago New»
the football team.
T
w
iff
r