of his own *oul In the grief of hl* com
TOPICS OF
THE TIMES
Hatred la a runt on the heart.
Opportunity never hunts far to find
the man.
Eccentricity Is fooliahnes* tfliat baa
succeeded.
The wise man should be thankful
the fools. The coutrust makes him
t Iceable.
The American Ice trust lost money
last year. Probably It had too much
watered stock.
It Is very hard to convince a dlrorceu
woman who has obtained big alimony
that marriage Is a failure.
There being little doing in the for-
elgu office. John Bull sent In another
warning to Abdul Hamid.
The race questlou la a serious one.
but the "coou” song problem la a far
more serious one ami far more difficult
of solution.
Kotne people act as though they
thought the world ought to come aud
knock them dowu with a club ami
make them take a living.
or the making of many laioks which
have alaiut ns much literature quality
ns may be found In ra< > track bonus
there seems to be literally no end.
The bachelor girl who admits that
she never had a chance to get married
has arrived at a point where she Is
willing to accept pity In lieu *>f ad
miration.
Ktlll we hesitate to take as fresh
news the statement of the dressmak
ers that "ligures are made, not born."
Nature has never been guilty of uiak
lug u "straight front."
London Truth says that under the In
fluence of the American woman “so
ciety has degenerated from a polite
pleasure nlo u professluii." That w as
what ruined baseball.
All actress has succeeded In advertls
Ing herself lu New York by whipping
u dude for kicking her dog. 'lhe press
agent la ut a loss to understand how
the news of the affair leaked out.
Most of the European military au
thoritles have agreed that the lance is
obsolete us a weapon of war uud have
ileelded not to use It hereafter. While
they were about It, why didn't they
also condemn the ballista, the cutupult
und the arquebus?
A new cure for tulMTculoala consists
In Inoculating children with a r rum
us soon a» possible after they are boru.
la It any wonder that some parenls
are pondering the wisdom of brluglng
children Into a world so full of experi
mentation and Inoculation7
“My daughter Is taking honors at
the school of mines," said a elmrmlug
woman recently, "and my son Is lu
Each
Purls learning dressmaking."
was following a decided bent which
was not to the taste of the other,
There Is no better reason for a cboleu
of profession than the determination
to do one's best work in the best way.
The Netherlands government, which
owns more than one half of the rail
ways In Holland, liuds Itself troubled
with Htrlkes of the railway employes.
It baa decided to ask l’nrllauient to
pass a law forbidding the employes
of the State railways to strike, and
the employes have decided to strike as
soon as the law la passed. Thia situ
■itIon la Interesting, and It should be
instructive.
A current circulation of $30. barring
n tiny fraction, for every man. ivomuu
and chilli in the commonwealth la
probably the la'st showing ever made
by any nation the price of a cow or
an overcoat for every lanly. Its distri
bution la a trifle Irregular, but that Is
like the sea's level, always in a state of
disturbance hiu I reetiflcatlon
Those
who haven’t got tlieir share of the $30
are Hot forbidden to hustle for It. and
those who have more the get rich-
quick conerTtis stand ready to redress
their balance with neatness and dl»
patch wlx never they are so mluded.
Among the Interesting statistical
facta v'outaiued lu a late volume of the
consular reports la a tabular state
ment of tlie value of Germany's trade
w ith Venezuela. The Imports Into Ger
many from Venezuela from ispj to
listi. Inclusive, amounted to fll.ikSA.
N00, alsiut 2 per cent of Germany’s
total Importai lull« These Imports seem
to have fallen off silice 1K'7, when
the highest ligure was reached, tin
the other hand, lhe exiHirts from tier
many Io Venezuela have Increased, the
highest figures having lieen reached in
Had. whi-n they amounted to fl.titltl.-
tMHI. While the figures Indicate that
Germany Is Increasing Its business
w ith \ enezuela. they show also that
the trade la amali and au Inconspicu
ous figure In the cummerelal records of
Germany
The numlier of railroad accidents
that have occurred In the United
States during the last few months la
abnormal and It has piixulet I the
country to account (or them. Kveu
th** ettiften who Lan no rallrtmt! expe
rience can dinting ulah very well t*e-
tween an unavoidable ^evident anti the
other kind. The other kind hate ap-
pnrrntly t»e*n the more numervtui
The alaughtering of human life In pre-
rentable ralnMid accident* la due to
in|M*<vncy
neglect. Now
cither incoiniM*i*n«
,y or
<»r ueglcct.
milr*
m. or at least those trusted
with the running of leromotlvM, are
far fr<Hn Incompetent. Tli hey are among
the flneat men of lhe cou »ntry. If they
Deflect their dutiea. when the results
are gener ally f.itnl to themselves. It
must be on account of physh-al and
mental exhaustion
If they are being
overworkeil the practice should «-ease.
Public Interest demands thia Impera
tively, but It Is bard to uudcratand
how the railroad» themselves can
stand tlie pr.qierty loss that follows
wrecks which can be classed as pre-
ven table.
iWhiteHandl
The announcement la made by the
British home eflee that Mrs. rion-m -
Maybrick, now undergoing sentence '
of penal servitude for life for the |
alleged murder of her husband, will be ,
released next year lu time for her to |
give her personal attention to suits
affecting her Interests In Kentucky. 1 BY AUSTIN C. BURDICK ;
Virginia and West Virginia. Hhould
Mrs. Maybrick live a yeur longer she
will be a free woman after uu Impris
CIIAITER XVIII.
onment lu Woklug prison of fifteen
Chopart was a bold, reckless man, and
years. Aa to the question of her guilt
cruel aud avaricl.....
He had cornu. . ne
or Innocence there will always tie a ed his career as commander at tue
division of public sentiment, though Natchez fort by cruelty to hta own men,
the great majority of people, both In but oue or two grave complaints made
this country aud In England, believe to Gov. I’erier had come nigh causing h*
her to be Innocent, lu spite of the cir removal, «nd he let the white* 1» in
cumstantial evidence agalust her. peaie, but expended his wrath upon the
Even among those who believe her poor Indians. He was now much elated,
guilty undoubtedly many think a life for he was sure that the beautiful village
sentence unnecessarily severe, and that of the White Apple would soon be his.
and he meant to pocket much money jn
fifteen years of eonlluement In the
the transaction. One day he «at in hit
hardest penal Institute in England Is rude house, with some of his attendants
sufficient punishment for a crime about him, when a soldier demanded ad
which had some mitigating features mittance.
alsiut It even from the standpoint of
"How now, sirrah?” he demanded, as
the prosecution. It Is needless to dis the man entered.
“I have come with a warning, the sol
cuss the question of Mrs. Maybrick's
n
guilt. No new point can be urged, no dier replied.
“Ha!—a warning Speak out.’
new facts presentetl. The question has
“An old woman passed my post this
been gone over lu Its every aspect. morning, monsieur, and she bade me tell
The pressure to secure her release has the French to be on their guard, for dan
been strong and continuous. Iler ger threatened them."
friends have never given up hope, not
"Aud from whom?”
withstanding the persistent refusal of
“From the Indiana. They will rise and
the home office to reopeu the case or to butcher us all.”
“Have you spoken of this before/
consider petitions.
They are about
"I have not.”
to succeed, aud when Mrs. Maybrick
"Then you shall not tell it to others,
Is out another quasi International
cried Chopart, In anger. “Have you uot
question will have been settled, much
seen enough of this idle fear? What ho!
to the general relief.
—without there!"
At thia call, two soldiers entered, who
The recent endow ment by Mr. Phipps usually stood in the passage to obey the
of an Institution lu Philadelphia for the commander's call.
"Take thia fedow and lock him up In
study and treatment of consumption
marks a new step forward In the cru the prison,” he ordered. "We’d soon
sade against tuberculosis. A consid have the red rats dowu upon us if they
eration of the appalling loss of life knew we lived in fear! They dare not
offer us harm. Away with him!”
from this disease, and the couvlctlon
And for conveying thia intelligence the
that It Is a preventable as well as a poor man waa caat into a strong dungeon,
curable malady, led a uumbtr of phy and there kept for several days with his
sicians ami philanthropists a few years feet lu the stocks.
ago to begin an organised campalgu
But this waa uot the only note of warn
against It. The plan of the campaign ing Chopart had. Four days afterwards
Is one primarily of Instruction. Interna a soldier came to him and informed him
tional congresses have been held to that the Indians surely meditated the de
consider ways and means not only of struction of the fort, and of all its white
inhabitants.
caring for the alck and curing the dis
"Out, fool!” exclaimed Chopart, an-
ease, but also and chiefly of diffusing grily. “The old hsg who told you this
a knowledge of the affection among the only thinks to frighten us. She thinks
people at large so that, knowing Its na that by exciting our fears she can fright
ture and the manner of Its spread, they en us into giving up our plan of taking
might Intelligently apply the measures their village of the White Apple, What!
for Its prevention. One congress held would ye show to the Indians that we
In Berlin offered a prize for u popular feared them? Away with such idle fool
essay ou tuberculosis and how to com ery!”
Tricked Arm was astounded at the in
bat IL The prize was won by an Amer
fatuation of the French commander, and
ican physician. Ills little book has been as a last resort she went to Chopart’s
translated Into all the leading lan lieutenant, a man named Mace, who, she
guages of the world, and millions of imagined, would have some influence
copies of It have been distributed. In with his superior. But even this proved
addition to this, many sanitariums fur abortive. She told Mzee that destruction
the care of the alck have lieen built or would surely fall upon them if they did
are planned. A philanthropist In Eng not take some means to keep the Indiana
land last year gave a large sum of mon away from the fort. But on the very
next day Chopart invited all the Indians
ey to be spent for the good of the peo
to a banquet, and pledged liia friendship
ple In whatever way the king might to them anew.
designate. Ills majesty decided to em
With a feeling of ntter consternation.
ploy the money In the crusude against Pricked Arm returned to her lodge, tine
tuberculosis. Prises were offered for evening she sought White Hand's dwell
plana for a sanitarium, uml the build ing. for she had a faint idea working
ing Is about to be begun. Many of the through her mind that the French youth
Ntatea and cities of this country have might hare some Influence in all this. She
hospitals for consumptives under con knew that he had been originally doomed
to death to go and intercede face to face
struction or In operation. The Institute
with the white mail's God, but she had
to be established In Philadelphia Is, never yet fully known why he was spar
however, more cotnprebeslve In Its ed. She found White Hand alone. He
scope than any In existence, lu nddltlon gazed eagerly into her fate, for he was
to the hospital and dispensary features anxious to know how her work progress
It Is Intended to be a great teaching ed.
"White Hand,” she said, speaking ab
center for the people, that they may
have a practical demonstration of the ruptly, “why were you spared from denth
best means of fighting thia deadly dis when you first came here?”
"That I might marry Coqualla," replied
ease. With all these forces at work the
youth.
against tuberculosis the hope of ulti
"But was there nothing else?” asked
mate victory Is bright, and Indeed the old woman, looking him sharply in
statistics already show n relative low the face.
ering of the death-rate from the dis
"Why, yes,” returned White Hand,
ease In many parts of the world.
speaking with some d.ttl lence, for the real
I reason seemed so foolish and ridiculous
"THIRD bTORY BACK" COMEDY. to him that he almost feared he ahould
I t>e laughed at for speaking of It.
Itow One Hoarder Managed to Pay Iler I
“And what was that?"
Room Rent,
“Why, I promised to pray to the white
The man with the bald spot nt the man's God that none of the wickedness
back of his bead was reading aloud of the French might aueceed, and also
from the reflections of Marcus Aurelius. to tell him how basely the red men had
been wronged by the invaders; for I was
The landlady told him to shut up.
“It's all very nice,” she said, "but I of that peoplr, and they supposed that I
should have some influence with my Su-
don't feel like listening to it to-day."
1 preme Father."
The bald mail closed the book over
"That's it!” the aged princess groaned,
his Index linger, which he generally with her hands folded across her bosom.
uaea for a book mark.
"How?" asked the youth, in surprise.
"What la the matter?" he asked.
“I knew that the Great Spirit had a
“I have been Imposed upon again.” hand in this work The fort at Natchez
said the landlady. 'The lady In the is doomed past all hope!”
"No not doomed!”
third story back room la the guilty par
"it la. The last stick will be removed
ty this time."
to morrow, and thru the blow must fall!”
The bald man said be was surprised i "To-morrow ?"
"She seems to be a very nice wom
"No the blow falls on the day after.
an,” he said. Mile la very popular.”
The fatal sticks mark the intervening
"Exceedingly so." said the landlady, days.”
’ And must all fall?—all—all?”
Ih acrid tones. “It la through her pop
"All at Natchez, but not elsewhere, for
ularity that she Imposed upon me. I»ay
after day str«-ama of people have called the others wait yet another week, and
to see her. They were all women, aud ere that time the whites w ill lie warned.
But what noise is that? Hark! There
many of them came with bundles. are
shouts of welcome."
There was one woman the short one
They both started for the door, where
with the scar on her chin—who came they were met by Stung Serpent, who
regularly every m ruing about 9 o'clock. caught the youth by the arm and for<ed
All day long I could hear a sewing ma him into the house again.
“White Hand,” he said, speaking quick
chine running at full gait In there, and
I thought the third-floor woman must ly and sternly, “remember your oath, for
be getting readv to get marrltsL she your salvation may now depend upon it
was nav ug so mauy clothes made, ltut The white men have come to carouse in
the White Apple. Beware that you do
the clothes wore not lu-ra. I found out not forget yourself! Shall we trust you?
alanit them this morning. They belong Mind all is well with you it you are
to the woman who cauie here with tile faithful f
bundles, and the short woman with the
"Fear not. my father."spoke the youth,
sear has been making them on the nnsIde to repress the trembling that seia-
third floor woman's nraehlue. The short ed his 1’iaha.
“Then you may conduct Coqualla to the
woman has actually paid rent for the
loom and the machine at the rate of « revelry."
It was a calm, warm night, and tn the
or fit a week, but not a cent of Compen
center of the great square were built two
sation have I had for the mr and t<ar fires of pitch wood to serve as torebea,
op my car|>et, on my door bell, and on and here the white men and the red were
my servants.
g-ithervd In social loofah -al amusement.
“I have Just been upstair* putting a There were over a hundred white ui. a
atop to It. If the short woman wants to there, an I at the r head was t h part him-
•ew In my bouse, why doesn't she rent self. Louie recognized him at once as a
s room from me outright. Instead of brutal man whom he had once tw u at
snvsklng In on the prettwiae of visiting New Orleans tlogg ng an Indian girl.
I
a friend? Without doubt that was the Moat of the whites were decent look Ing
men. but before the night had passed
most high handed arrangement I ever away. White Hand shrank away to his
came acn«a. I have heard of tenants lodge, and as he laid his aching head
In lodging houses carrying on all kinds upon hie pillow he drew Coqnalla close
of business In their own rooms, but I to him. ami in a sinking tone he mur
never Is-fore heard of sub letting a mured;
"Ala«! I am ashamed of my own peo
thirst story buck cupboard foe enough
money to pay the first rent”—New ple. With all their advantages of birth
and ealncztlon—with the enlightenment of
York Times.
* aces as their heritage, they are but sav
The average mother la very fond of ate • atiU!”
The next day found some d.>sea of the
■aylng. "I *su do without myself, but
I Frenchmen still at the Indian vt lage.
I «on t deny the ch.ldre^"
But the Great Suu hiuwelf, with a tew
A Tale of the Early Settlers
of his warrior*, ari ompanied them to tha
town, and there the dark monarch prom
ised Chopart that, in consideration of hi*
kiadm-M in allowing them to r«u,“‘O •”
long in their villag<', ih»z would bring
more than the a»«»nt.v of corn promised.
“On th- morrow.” he «aid. "we will
reuie with our tribute of corn, double
what we promised, an*! on the n»-xt day
we «hall leave the village of tbe White
Apple.”
“But stay.” crl d Chopart, “we will
have one more earousal ere we part. This
night you aliall bring your warriors here,
ami we'll cheer our »onia.”
"Our white brother afieaka kindly,” re
turned the Great Sun: "but will he not
t*e wroth at the rudeness of my people.’’
"No. Bring them, aud we'll pledge
friend-hip.”
“Thy red brother will come.”
"And his brave* with him?”
“It shall be so.”
Aud that night saw the acene of ca
rousal changed to Natchez. And there
they «at—the doorner aud the doomed!
And they pl dged eternal friendship! Ths
white man had planned to rob the red
mau of hi- birthright—to drive him from
hi- home, profane bi* temple, and plow
up hi- fathers’ grave*! Tbe red man
had planned to keep his home, to main
tain sacred hi* temple, to guard well bi*
father»’ grave», »nd that this» should be
done, the invader was to be »wept away!
It was a atrange pledge, but the white
mau was tbe first to offer it.
It was after midnight when they sep
arated. ami the -tar» lighted the Natchez
to their home». When they reached their
village: the Great Sun, io company with
bi» chiefs an.i nobles, went to the tem
ple an*l entered. They approached the
plaee where tbe »tick* had hung, but
there were noue there now. The leathern
tliougs hung against the wall, but there
was nothing iu them.
•‘Chiefs, nobles and warriors of the once
powerful Natchez, may not this be the
eve of our re awakening? The day is
part—the morn cometh! Shall not tbe
Natchez once more stand at the head of
nations? To-morrow we open the path,
and henceforth from that time let our
enemies beware! The Great Spirit is with
us, while the white man's God has for
saken him. What »bull we fear? Sleep
now, but sleep not too soundly nor too
long. Let the sun find us ready to bid
him welcome—so shall we do honor to
the parent of our great first king!”
Thu* spoke the Great Sun. and a* he
closed, he moved slowly towards the
door, and hi* chiefs followed him; and
ere long afterwards the village of the
White Apple was wrapped iu silence; but
there were two there who slept not.
White Hand »till prayed that the coming
death blow might not extend to his fath
er, and the wish kept sleep from his eye*.
And he who patched the sacred fire now
felt bis duty doubly binding, and sleep
came not to him, as he still kept up bi*
tireless vigils.
CHAPTER XIX.
At an early hour the Great Sun ami
Stung Serpent were astir, and when the
first rays of the morning sun darted into
th« beautiful vale, they rested upon all
tb« warriors of tbe Natchez there as
sembled. Such as had pistols carefully
loaded them, and hid them away with
their hunting knives in their bosoms.
Their tomahawks were sharpened and
slnng to their belts, and all took their
guns. Then each man of the common
class went and got his bng of corn, ami
having set it down, they commenced their
war dance. But they made not such hide
ous noise as usual—only enough to pro
pitiate the Great Spirit, and make him
acquainted with their intent.
It was well in the morning when they
set out. and by the middle of the forenoon
they reached Natchez. They entered the
place dancing uud singing, and straight
way ’carried their corn to the fort. Then
the red mm begun to separate—some this
way and some that. Every house hud
one or more visitors, according to the
number of people In it. Some begged for
milk, some asked to buy powder and shot,
for which they promised to pay ill corn
at some future day.
A richly stored
barge lay at the pier, which had come up
the day before, and on board this a num
ber of Imlluns crowded. Into the fort
they crept by different ways, presenting
themselves wherever there was a white
man. until at length they were distribut
ed wherever there was a blow to b,
struck.
At length a sort of solemn stillness
reigned over the devoted town, as though
the death angel had hushed all hearts.
But hark! What is that horrid yell that
comes from the fort—a yell that makes
the very blood freeze, and causes the
hair to stand on eud? What are those
fearful cries those maniac shouts—aud
those despairing groans?
The general assassination of the
French took so little time that the execu
tion of the deed and the preceding sign ils
were almost one and the same thing One
single discharge closed the whole affair,
lt cost the Natchez only twelve men to
destroy two hundred and fifty, through
the fault of the commanding officer, who
alone deserved the fate which was shar
ed by his unfortunate companions.
Some half dozen Frenchmen escaped,
as by a miracle, this general massacre,
ami made their way to New Orleans iu
safety. The women and children of the
whites were mostly saved to be kept as
prisoners.
Of course the Natchez supposed that
all the whites in the country were now
dead. Not one of them dream,«! that
they had been deceived into striking a
week too early. So they caroused in tbe
town all night, and on the next morning
they started for their village. They had
spared two men whom they retained as
prisoners, and who escaped from them
after having serveil them some Weeks.
One was a wag. ner, named Mayeux, w ho
was kept to transport the goods of the
Fren. h to the Indian village; and the oth
er was a tailor named Lebeau, whose ser
vices they wanted in fashioning the
French garments to their own u-e.
On the next morning. White Hand was
startled by the return of the Natchez.
He went out, but his heart sickened at
the scene be wss destined to witness.
Two hundred and fifty human heads—
But those who know the Indian charac
ter cau imagine the horrid orgies th y
might hold when fire I with revenge an I
flushed with victory. Even the historian,
who ileal* only with stubborn facts, lays
down his p,n in silent horror when he
finds himself in the midst of Ixteau’s
narrative of whst he saw in the Indian
village, and bids hi* reader* «pare him
the recital.
White Hani crept back to h e lolge
and C* q u al la found biin th.-re pale au I
faint. She bathed his temples and br..w,
and after a while be revived, but be dar
ed not venture out.
"Alaa, my compai nnT* murmnr*«| the
princess,
hey make horrid pomp over
the victory, but it ha« co»t them dear.
though they realise it not now
pie a i» now blind, but they »hall awake
to *•' i«e and ai*ht and know that the
beat man of them all
•»r*
“Coqualla ?* uttered the youth. atart.u<
up. It was a mere iuterr**ffative.
My father i< wuuadetl, even unto
death.” And aa the maiden thus »poke
h>.we,l her 11 ad and the big tear«
led down
<iown between
bet
trickled
h* r
How ” naked White Hand,
» “When? How?
forgetting for tbe motm at the deep terror
W -vU ths w M
++V+++++++++++++++-»"►♦♦♦♦. ► ’ Bowed
Down"
** Ik
At «be el ,e of*iCU,°*
G 0
«=»
panion.
“He received a bullet in his bosom yes
terday. But he »ent me for you. Come.”
White Hand aro-e aud followed “'“ I
qnalla from the lodge.
•“*
°*
the great hi —*-• oerore tbe temple, there | ♦♦♦♦♦»♦♦♦■»♦♦♦♦♦♦»»♦♦♦•fie i *
wa» a tire kindled, but th« youth dared
not look towards it. lie knew It* terri
ble purpose, an*l with quickened step» he
A certain parson of tlie old school,
hurried, stopping his ears with hi* fingers < who had preached a sermon of the tin-
to shut out the sounds that fell upon bis
ears. But fortunately he bad not far to est, old-fashioned flavor, after deplor
go. When he entered Stung Serpmt'» ing the new-fangled doctrines of some
dwelling, he found the women there cry- i at his younger bretberen—especially
ing and yelling in despair. Upon his bed the ideas of the heaven aud other
of bearskins lay Stung Serpent, brearbiiu historic places which they inculcated
heavily, and ever aud anon raising his In their discourses—wound up bls own
bead to listen to the sound* that cauie discourse by saying:
“As for me,
from the square. When his eye* rerted
brethren, the hell of our fathers Is
upon White Hand, he beckoned the youth
forward, at tbe lame time bidding the good enough for me.”
Senator Foraker does not care much
other* stand bark.
"Sit tbee down hy my side,” he »aid, for society, but of course, be is
“for I have much to *ay to tbee."
obliged to attend many functions dur
Quickly the youth sat down, for he ing the season at Washington, D. C.
hoped he should now know some things The other evening lie was heard to
that were only his at present by »uspi- i ghe tbe following order to his coach
cion.
man: “Drive us to Senator--------- ’s
(To bo continued.>
to dinner, then call and take us to
Mrs. --------- 's reception. At twelve call
WAY
TO
SMASH
TRUSTS.
ONE
tor us to go to the --------- embassy,
Jupiter
Hluvlus
Knocked
Oat
a
uud
after that take us to the mad-
How
' M.lal.M
dummies."
Short jC^torie$
bad an engage,,
w““">’tru. ,e.|
«Gaum. ,o
not perceive
? “'•fl
I . ......... ...........
I
Corner in Olymuhn Nectar.
house."
The txiss of high Olympus looked up
| When a colored waiter, dubbed
from his cup with a wry expression.
_________ ” accidentally spilled some
"What's the matter. Jupe?” Inquired "Snowball,
soup
on a ¡Southern representative
soup
Juno, as she dipped into the ambrosia whom ‘ he was serving, the wrath of
platter.
the Congressman knew no bounds. Af
"It's this nectar,” replied the eminent ter a long scolding, the ‘ infuriated •
Olympian. "It ain't up to the standard.
_____
“Snowball, you
Southerner
roared:
What's the matter with It?"
have scalded a man who may be Pres
"in my opinion.” said Juno, as she ident of the United States.”
Snow
took a spoonful of the honey of Hybla. ball’s face relaxed, and two gleaming
“It’s all the fault of the trust. They rows of ivories came into prominence.
have let the quality run down. And
“Lawd, mistah," said he, "when you
at the same time they have raised tbe
gets to be President I reckon I’ll be
price.”
Gawd.”
•Trust!” cried Jupiter. "What trust
| A story Is told of a pastor of a
is that?”
England town who went to
“The Olympian Nectar trust.” replied small New
and returned to his home
Juno. ”1 thought you knew all about New York
with the idea that he had seen about
lt. Mercury Is the president and gen
all there was to see. When he was
eral manager, and he aud Apollo are
asked by one of his trusted friends
the board of directors. Mars wanted to
If he had studied the gambling dens
buy In. but they wouldn’t let him. They
and gambled himself, he hesitatingly
claimed he was too quarrelsome. They
confessed that lie had.
“Where?”
gave Neptune 100 shares of preferred
queried hlB astonished friend. “Well,
on condition that he'd help them water
you see lt was this way. 1 went down
the stock. I thought you heard of it
to the Bowery and found one of them
at the time.”
gamblin' machines. And, would you
Jupiter looked black, says the Cleve
believe It, I Just stood there and risked
land Plain Dealer, as he pushed away
pennies In that machine till the guui
from the table.
“I hear of lt now for the first time,” wouldn't come any more.”
An amusing story Is told of Lady
he growled, and the echoes of his growl
reverberated among the distant hills. Barker's first dinner-party at Simla.
“And what’s more. I don't expect to Desirous of having a pretty table. Lady
hear of It again. Syndicate my nectar, Barker had herself expended much
will they! Why, blame their pesky care In decorating lt. She had Just
| received from Europe certain dainty
hides, what do they mean by It?”
"There, there. Juple,” said Juno, In china figures and ornamental dishes,
her most soothing tone, "don’t get so and had arranged a tempting show of
riled. The boys didn’t know how vexed sweetmeats, flowers and fruit, When
dressing time came, Ijidy Barker
you'd feel about It.”
“Well, they'll soon find out! Haven’t charged her servants to be on the
they a plant somewhere, or some watch and take care of everything;
but something of Interest occurred out
thing?”
"There It Is.” said the statuesque one, side. and every servant left the room,
quite forgetting to close an open win
as she pointed to a lower terrace.
dow. Before this window was a big
Jupiter grimly 'smiled.
“We won’t have to wait for any Su tree on which sat several monkeys,
preme Court decision In this case.” he which hnd watched the preparations
A
remarked, ns he stepped to the nearest for dinner with much Interest.
cupboard and drew out what looked to half hour later the hostess appeared
ready to receive her guests. Just to
be a half dozen metallic skyrockets.
At sight of them Juno gave a little be sure that everything was right, she
scream and put her hands over her gave a glance into tlie dining-room.
ears. A moment later Jupiter stood There she beheld a busy company of
by the open window and drew back monkeys hard at work, grinning and
his massive arm. There was a blind Jabbering, their cheeks and arms cram
Ing flash and a startling report, and med with expensive sweetmeats, while
the nectar plant on the terrace below the table presented a scene of fright
trembled to Its base. Thunderbolt fol ful devastation—broken glass and
lowed thunderbolt, and when the sixth china, fair linen soiled, everything
was thrown there wasn’t a vestige of tossed about in hopeless confusion.
From this wreck she had to turn aside
the building left.
"There," said Jupiter, as he wiped and welcome her guests with as milch
Ida hands on Ills napkin and calmly re ease of manner as possible. Dinner,
sumed his seat at the table, “I fancy of course, bad to be deferred until or-
that's one way of solving the trust dor could be restored.
problem. Pass the nightingale tongues
THE SECOND TROMBONE.
please.”
VERSATILE MR. HILL.
Rnllroad Mnanst» XVho Knew How to
Handle a Derailed tnuine.
A Musician’s Trick that Had Ver, Ln-
dicroua Vonaeqnences.
<
he made It v,.rv . M
day for both the
LOVE
foun 0 a ^
There Is a\’„"
And a way.’’ huJ
T,
“'"■“y« a good 0Ue 2^
doubtful. On one of tr*0* 1
a between
young Kansas
fir«n7aCl^
Sometimes,
SllV(t
in Kansas Cty, a,.d
passe,I nllli h(. f
’m«1 I
’’
'»aq
pearance tbe ml.tr«.
bouse asked about hfe
He. ln the lK>-pitsV.
«ho runs the <ngi,,*
eab with Black,nar
railroad hospital. Jo. k
Of course every 0IW .X,
«1 an explanation.
"Well," the engineer be«,,
a aweetheart. and
with a bouquet, .ud
the rest.
Half way across the«,,.,
side of Moberly, the girl U
by her fence and Wave
at him. Tllat wa. |„ tJ'
the summer, when the
the fence began to bloomT
to make bouquets. Hnd «J
sped by she used to thro,,J
engine cab.
Of
missed, but she kept 0D £
It seems to hurt yonn |J
have the posh, cru.hed»
wheels, and one Stmdav
calling on her. they
.
"The next day, when tl»a
by, the girl bad her boowj
to a long fishlng.poie. 8Lt J
the moving train, but .be J
too slow.
“The next day the wM J
with her fishing pole
and this time she gareivaJ
Young Blackrnar w.. in
dow, with bis mouth on i J
Well, he caught tbe bouqj
and all, anil .he w.r«i ¡¡¡J
phant good-by. Thafim«
that."
“Caught tbe bouquet box’”;
boarders.
“Square In the mouth. Wq
back down to Moberly to Qfl
on the next train, with lull
punched out.”
“I suppose the wedding
soon be chiming?" said in«
widow.
"Well. If they ain’t, thersfl
He’s no beauty. I doubt!
another girl In Moberly wooli)
now.”
HOODOOED EAR
Possessed by This Mia li
Getting Him Into Trig
“Dou you know I believtfl
ears is hoodooed," said tipj
man as lie settled down Intml
chair, "and 1 know a gooda|
which tend to strengthen 1
Impossible, ell? Well, jwl
Isb.
"One of my old acbaoltM
hoodooes toe.
Every ti»i
happened to him It bappafl
toe. Now he would '«tufi
off; ajjaln he would pick fl
or u splinter; or he would fl
mashed—all these thlngi iN
pened to the same toe. Hi I
What happened? Corn—afi
ever saw—on the samt ufl
I knew another fellow. Fu
to have a pick at hi* no«. •
anything happened his n«
thing It happened to. Owfl
tried to cut him with • ran
clipped the end of bit uoxi
clous bit of economy, it J«*
During an election row set
later he gut Into a thtonfl
A man shot him with a riltid
off another bit of his nose •
after this my friend got B
row, and Ills adversary J
down, and in tlie skirmutl
lowed, chewed another h*®!
his nose off. A polleemssfl
across the nose with a dfl«
later time—broke the b#
way with my right ear. I:'1
When a mere boy I wastttf*
horse. Bruised the lobe
ear. Got hit in a hall P**
Right ear again. Oncest?1
I got Into a tlglit and the*
three times, and every t!**
landed squarely on therg“*
the other day, as another
was sitting in a «lining *'*rf4
New Orleans, when thettW*
There Is a Philadelphia drummer who
Is known as a kind-hearted and oblig
James J. Hill's wonderful versatility ing man, always ready to do a favor If
aud grasp U|H>n the multitude of details he can. Lately, however, he had an
of practical railroad management have experience which may make him cau
ls-en a source of much comment among tious, or at least may Influence him to
railroad men In recent years. While
consider more carefully whether or not
on a tour over the Great Northern road,
his kindness Is wisely bestowed. He
his train, which was going down a
tells the story himself to a reporter for
steep grade. Is-came derailed. Running the Philadelphia Telegraph.
at a low nite of speed as the train was,
While 1 was In a small city not long
no damage waa sustained by the offi
cials further than a general shaking up. ago a concert company which carried
Mr. Hill was the first man to alight Its own orchestrn put up at the hotel
Among the
when the train stopped after ruuning where I was Btaying.
several rods along the ties. He found musicians was a tromtione-player who
that the locomotive had lieen thrown was a friend and neighbor of mine in
from th«> rails, anil stood watching the Philadelphia. 1 saw him soon after his
ineffectual efforts of the train crew to arrivel, and be had such a very wobe-
place the engine back on the track. gone look that I asked him what the
Jackscrews were used, but the men did matter was.
"To tell the truth, Jim," he said, “Pm
not seem to thoroughly understand the
work.
In a lot of trouble. I’m engaged to a
"That won’t do.” said Mr. Hill. “Tour young lady In this town, and I rather
Jacks won't lift lt when In that posi foolishly promised to speud the even
tion.”
ing with her, thinking I conld get a
But the men applied the levers, think- ' substitute to play for me, but there
Ing they would show the president that isn’t a trombonist in town.”
“Too bad!" said 1. His face lighted swung around a sharp
they knew their business. The jacks
table, chair, linen. *1 ’
slIpiH-d. letting the ponderous machine 1 up suddenly.
was thrown violently apl>R
down on the ties with a bump.
"Why, Jim,” he said, “you can help side of tbe car. See that ih
"Let me set that Js<-k.” said Mr. Hill: me out! You'ye musical-^-”
ear—same old result. I’--
"I don't think lt will slip then." And.
"But I don't know the first thing me—It’s boodoes, that s’«
grabbing the screw, he set It at an In about a trombone,” 1 Interrupted.
certain of one thing—l»^
cline to his own satisfaction, and. after I "Ob. that won't matter,” he said, In the neck, not a* lenfl*’^
throwing a little sand on the top and ! lightly. "I play second trombone, and
ear.”—New Orleans T
bottom, lie i-xclaliiitsl. "Now go ahead." | all you will have to do Is to follow
“(eiing !>«•• J
The train men wen- a little dubious at ! the movements of the first trombone,
flrst. but they applhsl the levers, and I puff out your cheeks and keep your
The late Coi* : "1
the huge machine slowly lifted Itself . eyes on the music. I'd do as tnuch for one of the moat Imp»™**,
Into place and slid quietly onto the you."
American edm .’it: *■
rail« The delay was only twenty min-1 "All right." I said. "Go along. I'U story of an experf*Bff J
llt.-s New York Tt,----
when he was visiting *
do my liest.”
.
J
I know a little about music; that Is, in Chicago.
Question of l>egr e.
A little Scotch b»f
I ran bat out a few things on the piano,
phiV'<» phjr of human exiatence but as soon aa I took my place ln the saying "do n'
’ ‘ _ fl
«nwed In the presence of the orchestra I felt awkward with a trom Finally Colonel
J
!*nta:ive of the Washington Star bone. The first numlier on the pro and shouted “Do<fi-r ** ,
* viv up ni-'ii,” rvin.irk»‘4 the tint
gram was a selection from "The Bo- voice.
that a man who ha« a college de- hemtan
h‘’“
Girl." and I was scared blue
The little » ot
•**-- *— ‘ ‘
successful in when I saw that "The Heart Rowed a youngster In tlie rf*' .^1
Down” «as arranged for two trom- Jumped to 1 -
bine*. I wanted to run. but there hand tnechanl* ally- M
was no chance. Then the leader made with a cohf i-d l"*'k
“Well, my N’y." •*1,1
a pass at me with his baton, and I
got ready. . I So did the
_______
“
you
must t*e i
»'
first trombone.
"No. sir. I sln't ‘
He puffed out
his
cheek*
---- —V Iix-wwi. So dill I.
The lender made another pass with the down to M — ‘'n^___
baton, and In obedience I worked away
He
Mr.
on the trombone. Tbe flrst trombone
enterpri»!“«
An
Mr. <1 1 the same. But neither of us pro
Jones
York employ* • tn «^5
duced a sound.
ticularly expert
I conld a«« that the leader was boiling In tbe nio«: ' •
again
with rage. So Wsg I—against the flrat
assistant «««’
trom' • ne. for I , felt sure
that -- If —
he =* bad
----- ------
»«„ tbe brlfleiff" " ’ *’!Jf *
Grief hatkiw* h«a
*
■*
»ven whij, lt done bls
_ J
Plsr-l the lerly adjust
age* bead*, lie J,
a»com! pan. But tbe leader quickly | clous an occasib*