yro^_e-»-4nd can you rea”v and
tra!y rueue-me«* Abraham I.iti.
¿nwuipie— W hy, Vi » of <■> u -
T om see, I'm a great deal older tiian
you are.
Freddy—Say, grandpa, how old
trill I have to be before I can remem­
ber him?
A Masculine Lady'» Maid.
»♦♦♦♦♦♦» rV .»4 ^titillili?
Bishop Philpotts, cf Exeter, «xiee
weut to stay with a fr.eud lu Devon-
shire. “It’s a l>eautiful place, is it not?"
remarked somebody upon his return,
kes, said the Bishop, "it is a beauti­
ful place; if it were mine, 1 would pull
down tbe bouse aud fill up the pond
"itli It. 1 hat would remove two ob-
jeetiolis.”
A Bostonian while exploring the
file« of a paper printed in his town a
century ago came across this rather
startling advertisement: “H. Kogers
informs those ladie« who wish to be
dressed by him, either on assembly
or ball days, to give him notice the
Attorney Isidor Raym-r, one of Rear-
previous day. Ladies who engage to Adm.tai Sel-ley s couiise, iu tlie court
and don’t dress must pay half price.” of inquiry, was once interrupted by
1 Lomas B. Reed, while making u
When the Proportion 1» Right.
speech in favor of a reduction of the
"But true love, you know," urged tariff, with the remark: "Did not the
the young man, "can live
geutletuaii hear my «¡»eeeh Saturday ."
and cheese and kissi-s. ”
No, ri-plied Rayner, "1 was at home
"That may I* true when the pro- preparing a speech of my own.”
portion is right,” returned the prac-
It is related that Feehter was more
tical old gentleman, “but, unfortu- than once the victim of an outspoken
nately, in your case, it is about nine- London gallery-god. Vu one occasion,
tenths kisses,”—Chiengo Pest.
in a melodrama, the tragedian was
slowly paying over a sum of money to
CITO Fsrmaaei U, i
.
-or r-.
rllw alter nr»l i»» « 4.- f P- hl«,. r-a. \-rr< the villain. Every thing depended upon
K»Ur«r Senator FKEI SS.OO’riBl‘ .'ll-Bn tra».
¡,t. I1S.B. U. E lim L ui ..> si arti, st.. FluladclahikP» whether h«- bail sufficient money for his
purpose, aud the paying out was most
A Mere Formality. ,
deliberate so deliberate, indeed, that
Haddon Erve—I waas to marry a meiubet’of tlie audience, wearylug of
your daugiiti-r, air.
the scene, enlivened tlie proceeding* by
Mr. Goldrox—ll’ni! What ar- your yelling: "Say, Mr. Feehter. give him a
prospects?
cheek."
Ha«ldon Erve—Fine. She’s willing,
Once, when the Secretary of War,
so it doesn’t much matter what any
Elihu ltoot, had approved a punishment
one else says.—Philadelphia Press.
of an offender In the Philippines with
a severity w hich seemed somew hat dis­
Claiming her Privileges.
proportionate to the crime, a visitor
"I want it understood, mum,” ventured to ask him w hether he did not
«aid Bridget before signing with her consider such a penalty a good deal
new mistress, "that I shall have me like the ol<l law of England which
reg’lar afternoons off during the hot hanged a man for stealing a sheep.
weather without prejudyce to me va­ "Certainly,” was the answer, "and we
cation of wan week in October, muni” impose it in the same spirit, not as an
—Chicago Tribune.
expiatory sacrifice, but as a preventive.
The thief was hanged, not because a
Well Received.
stolen sheep was regarded as worth a
Simpson—We went out last night human life, but in order that more
to serenade the Perkins girls.
Sheep should not be stolen.”
Hopkins—Di«! it go off all right.
When President Roosevelt was a po­
Simpson—Their father threw half lice commissioner of New York, ill
a dollar down to us and said please 18115, Dr. Alilwardt, the anti-Semitic
play till da-' gbt—maybe it would agitator from Berlin, visited the me­
help him to get some sleep.—Chicago tropolis. Not a few of the New York
Record-Herald.
anti-Semites came to Roosevelt in
alarm
lest the Jews should rise and
Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow’s Sooth­
ing Syrup the best remedy to use tor their mob tlie orator on the night of his first
children during the teething period.
address. The commissioner's response
was to select from the whole police
Robbers.
force a squad of Hebrews whose physi­
"Henry! Henry!” whispered the ognomy bespoke their race most con­
wife of the good citizen, “there’s a spicuously; these officers he placed In
charge of the hall where Ahiwardt was
roblier in the house.”
"Lot’s of them,” replied Henry, to appear, w ith a reminder that in tills
"in the house and senate, too, but country of free speech they could show
they ain’t a circumstance to those in their good citizenship in no more strik­
the city councils.”—Philadelphia ing manner than by protecting the very
man who had come to hurl contempt
Press.
and abuse nt their people, The effect
Each Anxious to Try.
of this bit of comedy was to make Ahl-
"Fame,” said the man with the wardt ridiculous, and cause his whole
melancholy eye, "is but an empty crusade to fall pitifully tlat.
A wealthy American who took the
bubble.”
"Yes,” answered the friend with waters at Carlsbad this summer was
longhair "But every man has tlie given minute instructions by his phy­
idea that if he could get hold of it he sician, who dismissal him with this in­
could turn it into a dirigible balloon. ” junction: "As for smoking, you must
—Washington Star
limit yourself to three cigars daily;
three light elgara and no more." After
Noblesse Oblige.
a few days, the patient visited bis phy­
“What are you «taring at, Nellie?” sician, who asked: "Well, and bow are
"Oil, please, ma'am,'with your hair you?” "1 should be all right." replied
like that and your diamonds you do the patient, “but your orders about
look bo like I.ndy Plantagenet Ging­ smoking are difficult to follow.” "1 am
ham that I was own maul to! Are sorry." the doctor said, categorically,
"but no more than three cigars a day.
you any relation, ma’am?”
"No—at least no near relation. You must Just put up with it.” “But.
But you can have that pink silk doctor, it really is an awful business.
shirt waist of mine, Nelli«-.”
Wouldn't two a day do? I feel ill every
time I smoke.” "Why, man. what In
I do not believe 1’iso's Cure for Con­ the world do you smoke for at al). If
sumption has an equal for couch* and
colds,—J ohn F. Bora*. Trinity Springs. that is tlie case?" the doctor roared.
“But. doctor, wasn’t It you yourself
Ind., Feb. 15. 1900.
who said /three cigars h day ami no
Hard Reputation.
more?' Of course. 1 thought they were
"You are wanted in a hurry at Mr. part of the cure, and began upon them,
Gazzam’s!” cried the
youngster, though I never in my life smoked be­
fore.”
breathlessly.
"Are you sure they sent for me?”
SQUIRE S WIFE TIED KNOT.
asked young I>r. Killiarn.
"Yes; they said you could not do North Carolina Woman Marrie» Couple
In Huabind’a Absence.
any harm, as Mr. Gazzam s dying
now. ”—Philadelphia Press.
Squire Wad<- Bailes Is a North Caro­
lina Trial Justice who lives lu the
Poor Start in Life.
neighlsirliood known as S ewarttown,
"When I started out in life I which is t wetity miles from any town.
Half of his house hangs In Chester-
didn’t have a dollar to my name,”
field County. South Carolina, and the
said the man who boasts.
"That’s notihng, » ” » answered his other In tin- Tar-lleel State.
The Stat«- of North Carolina requires
satirical friend, i "When 1 started
out I didn’t even have all my name a license to b«- obtain«-d for marriages.
It was several weeks before I was In South Carolina there i* no such re­
christened.”—M ashington Star.
struction.
Because of hl» location Bailes has
Just So.
found that fee« for marriages consti­
Little Elmer (who has an inquiring tute a large part <>f his Income.
North Carolina couples who are un­
mind)—Papa, what is firmness?
Prof. Broadhead — The exercise of able or unw illing to pay for a license,
or who are in an espeiial hurry, are
will power, my son.
Little Elmer—Well, sir, and what Invited into tbe South Carolina side of
th«- house mid there the service is per-
is obstinacy?
Prof. Broadhead—The exercise of forined.
Everything went smoothly until a
won't power, my son.—Puck
few «lays ago. In th«- nbsenee of the
There i« more Catsrrh tn thn e<-r- m o' .he
counir» than all ciher di-e»«-e |>T. t"»1 '/r- lv Up Jill'l (¡♦‘IU*IU'i»,‘l
sn4 until «he Is»’ f--» year»«»« su o-
Incurable, f or a g-at many ' ■ a-’'t
'• I * Carolina. Th«- squires wife
Bounced H • local dii-« e. »-.4 j ■ r.b. i .M
remedies, ar.4 ty connanily f». i-« 1
™ her liusbatid was away. Six
with l.cal treat-nent. pr .1 o'-ed •
rame. she could fierform the servi
N’ience has pr. on catarrh t • t » a
•
knew it by heart. an«l also
tioMl dtaease-nnd therefore t
t onal treatm« nt. Hälfe <’»tarrh
sliding •cal'* »r charge«.
ufai ttired I k j Cbei ey A < . 1
The young persons were aatfafied;
ietheon'.y c n»t tnt nil «'ire
It it taken interne. » 111 ’--•* : ' '
,
they were taken Into the house ami
at espoonful. It a. s dir ■ y • o
‘
•nd mucom Rurfares of t : e «vwxerr i.
r married.
one hundred dollar» for any <-a.- t lain
Several days later, says a I hiia i- i
cure. Send for circular« and t- •’ n'"n.'5:„
phia Nor’li Am-rb :iti »pe-ial. tbe uirl's
drees,
F J < H « '
A < O.. Toledo, O.
Sold by Pr-tev •’». " s’.
father beard that a woman had played
Vail's Family Fill» are tbe bett.
minister at his daughter’s marriage He
promptly procured a license and a
No Giuwing Hunger to Forbid.
Brown—I wonder why big strikes preacher ami had the knot retied.
Mrs. Bal«-« has I**-» notlffe«! not t«>
always come on—or come off—in
do any more marrying, but she cannot
hot weather?
Jones—Oh. in hot weather a n an understand why.
generally get« the idea that !■ ■ ' '
MENDING POCKET KNIVES
sustain life on pump water—I hicag"
Record-Herald
-»ntimrnt.l Vts»««» ttist lx- .4 I t -P'e
to the Catler’s -hep.
New» from th« Interior.
d
A man of an Inquiring turn wh<
"The new telegraph editor is a read on tbe front of a cutler » sbo
humorist”
sign. "Pocket Anlve« ll» l-l.i' •• «’■
„ "Well?”
bandied." »"><J ’ho r««»"»
ran
­
"He heads an account of th
that, when be was a tx»7. >'•' '>•
ni
‘ ! •'
nibal islanders eating the
' ■
• » » >-. t a new bla-1- put If. -
scientists, 'Trouble in Their Midst
. > ...ka ,.ne out of hi« knife, f.
-—Cleveland Plaindealer
O
Not lateretted «» hey
“They say tbe hay crop th.« year
will be immense.”
"H«>w al» ü* the g.«- in ■
"The «h.V ’
"Hang it. man, «lidn't you know
that I ha«l Is-ugbt an autone bile.
—Cleveland Piain Dealer.
katfe
t
years."
one gentleman. and
hands i
•
.
• « ■
nee be was a bo». and that h« d hate
> lose.
Many kniws bmuicbt in fur repairs
are prized tss ause they are gifts'; or
they w er«- bought in tome foreign «'oun-
try. or they Just suit tbe baud of the
man that use s th. in. There are various
more or less » «entlmental reasons why a
man may prefer to keep the old knife
rather than discard It for a new one.
Then it may l>e that in some other
case« the knife is too valuable to
lie thrown away, So that first ami last
ami for one reason and another out of
the vast number of pocket knives car­
ried a . -«si many come lu to be mended.
Tbe repairs made to pocket knlv«-s
are of a laried character. They may
consist, for example. In the putting on
of one new pearl side on a ¡«earl-hau-
died knife to replace a side cracked or
flaw . d. With long us - the blade at the
hlugeil end or the spring in the handle
or the rivet by which the blade is held
may get worn so thut the knife blade
wihi t close projH-rly. or may be
spring Is no longer as It shouhl
flush with the back of the knife, lu
a great many things can happeu
pock«-t knife, and of course tbe more
idades the mon- things can iiaiqieu, but
the cutler repairs them all.
The phrase "reldaded and rehandled"
suggi-sti-d. of course, the idea of a com­
plete renewal, ami the iuqulrer won­
dered if It might not b«- possible that
with tlx- repair of a knife In one part
and another such a renewal might oc­
cur. And the cutler
was It possible, but that sometimes It
actually did hap|>eu that with nkves-
slve renew ills of its various parts tbe
whole knife came sometimes to l>e en­
tirely renewed. Hud there was left of
the original knife nothing.
Locating Smokeless dun».
Tlie Englls'i war offices new scheme
for tlie training of Tommy Atkins in
maneuvers embraces many novelties,
which w ill in due course see the light
of practical demonstration. Among
these none is more interesting or
fraught with greater isissibllities tliiiu
the devic» fo training soldiers to lo­
cate guns firing smokeless powder.
Arrangements are being made to
carry out exfierlment« 111 this direction
at Aidershot, and the sappers have al­
ready constructed an ingenious battle­
field upou Ash Ranges, which will
make field firing very realistic, lu the
trial to come an Infantry force will
approach the ranges, and will Imme­
diately lie fired upon by distant guns.
Endeavor will be made to locate the
field pieces and the Infantry will move
forward In cover. As they advance
surprise targets representing cavalry
and mounted Infantry will spring upon
flank and front, an nrnioreil train will
run out. and all the features of a mod­
ern butthsfield will be represented
against the advancing force. This
method will cull for great Initiative
front commanders, and the targets will
be so made that good shooting will be
recorded by the targets being knocked
over.
As an inducement to make Infantry
take cover n new device has tieen
adopted. Artillerymen are to accom­
pany the advancing columns, ami
w lien a distant gun fires Its dummy
shell they will produce a correspond­
ing explosion among tlie attackers by
means of a small mortar thus teach­
ing the lesson of cover and caution ns
no other means short of live shell
could do.—London Expri-ss.
FROM
NOV. 30™
STAR
A Nan«i How.
A curious |ilieiioni<-tioti was recently
witnessixl from tin- Antelope Island, in
th«- «¡rent Salt Lake, I'. S. «»tie after
noon a gentleman saw wliat np]>«-ar«sl
to be a tin«- rainls>wxl-etw«M-ii th«- Island
and the mainlan«!. yet no rain was fall­
ing any where In the locality. The Isiw
was double the breadth of an ordinary
rainbow, ami there was n se«-ondary
Isiw above it < >>> l-»>klng into the mat­
ter h<- tra««»l the bow to a cloud of
-in 1 from tin- shore of the lake. The
«un<! is ' oolitic.'’ to use a geological
w
itig the sunlight produced the bow.
Wonderful Well.
(PLUG SMOKING)
HORSESHOE
4._>
mONMlrai
SPEARHEAD"
“SICKLE
(PLUG SMOKING )
NOBBYSPUN ROLL
PIPER HEIDSIECK
BOOTJACK
OLEVARGINY
’ Snidi »to
hut
str
■S ilvi » ml nr rtj
TA»t AftASuKt
• r«o .»rt.,
rrt. » .»
rtour
•• E. Rice, Greenville," ««J. T„" ««Good Luck,
Cross Bow," •• Old Honesty,” " Brandywine,
Jolly Tar," •«Standard Navy,” ••Planet," ••Nep­
tune,” •• Razor," •• Tennessee Cross Tie," “Granger
Twist."
«
(Two “ Granger Twist " tag« being equal to one of othert mentioned.)
4 TAOS MAY BB ASSORTED IN SECURINQ PRESENTS.
fOdKr^n PC*
ma re*
CO CA*rt
Our new illustrated
ton
A
CATALOGUE OF PRESENTS
FOR 1902
su tu»
it itti m « wu
trtuttr
* will include many articles not shown here. It will contain the
moat attractive Liat of Preaenta ever offered for Tag», and will
be aent by mail on receipt of poetage—two cant«.
(Catalogue will be ready for mailing about January l«t,tpo> )
Write your Mme and address fhutfy on outside of packages
containing Tags, and send them and requests for Presents to
C. My. BROWN,
4241 FelaomAve.,
St. Louie, Mo
»Vit unti
eu» ntt.
(«eu
Colonies at Kingdom».
"Oh, yes I can.
I have l*-en in a
tight bathing suit when it started to
Qii<-on Elixalieth was commonly
shrink.”—Chicago News.
spoken of an queen of Virginia. Vir­
ginia and Carolina were kingdoms
Maaaacliusetta
Pain, Suffering, Witard Oil coni«! not under th«- Stuarts.
live together, so pain and suffering was recognized an a sinter kingdom
rnove-1 out. Ask your druggist about iL l>y Cromwell's parliament.
was
»>y
■llggration. His
gg.-.ted that since be could
. lie might as well »it up
,mw> the Iwby
It w«>rkr«i
charm. — Chi« ago K«« or«i-
THE BEST
WATERPROOF CLOTHING
1
J
Sort On th« Old Man.
raid he’d rather go to jail
ay hia divorced wife’a
k'ZJHERA*’
HAC-t *• •
ac « i
at rf I jw
IKCORPOKATID it".
G. P. RUMMEHN A SONS.
Ill leeaed St., Hear Wuhhr»". ParU.riS, Orphan.
Loading and Rollablo Furrlert of
BISHOP SCOTT ACADEMY
STAR
< “ • uON
•» «»♦* it %
FÙ1. NCf 0 I B7 o
A HOMI ’XH001 I0R BOYS
Siiti IS -IMM
“IlilAfl'' N(5
• *•*•»' <f,
WINO
MILL.
« lit .p»l‘-CI».l
H m bad Learfae In tnrn-tablw
Turn* freely to the wind.
bewrinca thrust tn wheel, Ineurinf
...Columbia University... I If Hail
h teat running qualities
reserving
greatest amount of power for pumping
Aeademic and Collegiate Hai!«.
<>alvaiitzr>i after makinw. Put touether
with ravsnued bolts, d-»uMe>nutte«i; no
COt'K-r» «•»•»<». I lt»r«r» «■ »ntl«e si«4 fan tan rust or ret loose and rattle.
< omm»rrl»l >..r i-.rtle ila», appi» U>
Weight regulator; perfect regmlatioti. No
kprintr to <• a* ue tentio'i with ever* cnangw
REV. E. P. MURPHY, Preudent.
of v-nine rat ur . and rrow weaker with age.
l'ni»«fMty Park. Por«lan4. ore* •n.
Repair* iw»vi on hand
These things are worth money is vou.
Then why not boy a START
MITCHELL, LEWIS
W A N | F.r>—A brighi voong ti ari or
A STA VER CO.
woman U> repr«s- nt ns in ra< h ocal-
PORT LARD. ORtaon.
itv. A g'*sl opportuni'y fo» steady
ami lncrati»»»mplo»rr»rit. Addrraa,
JOHN POOLE, Portland, Oregoa,
UNION PI BLISMIMi CO..
IH twwl» HiiU-llne
fwd HarrtaM «raan
t-OHTLANt». <»RK
Send no Money «Ih sn<l Mor»l«ou »»«.. • ______
s
• ■ • • If ■*
Can five voa ths best bargain« In
I Summer Kewlutions
Ftlggies. Flow». Boilers and Engines,
W
1 ' 1 .1 • P ■ < . I
■ P
»N I «-»-
Win mills and Pnmne ani «sonerai
Machinery. bee ue betöre busing.
itv
CAUMCUCtrfU
jsowsa-'uu une OF
4A<te“CNT3 AND «AT*
A JT0<CSCO rOS’ON MASS a«
Keeloy Cure
Skt» r«lw« baa miso», oplaa sa t lisaSM
lisa aead la« partwaiaes t.
o
0
Northwaat.
SCHOOLS »NO COLLEGES.
TAURO WWITJTÖ Brighi Man Wantod.
ORMUf Wtsntrcit
I ain't
yrater-
„ —Nothin’
an old paj*r
tho
I r coats Capa» Co arolia« Boa '
Made in all the> Fashionable Ian.
Fur Trimmings
Kooaa and Hugs
San-l for «alatogli«,
rem-ntsl«.’-! »nt rr|>»lr«'t. Writs ui
IN THE WORLD
MASS TFflJ TRADE F1AÎÜ
riti
E[) lt7u
Nat Entirely Mute.
Terrible Preirure.
He—What I feel for you, Muriel,
“The barbarian« buried their pris­
I can never tell you in word». True
oners in a kind of cement that con­
love in silent.
Tho
tracted as it hardened.
You can t
It
Muriel—Oh, no, I assure you.
imagine how horrible it must have
»|H'aka to papa.
Whenever rot
an aa an Idlo
ata that »be h
1» In love wl
- \
icmh
lAkT An J
LD PEACH £ HONEY
l*f TAiS
Patents
0 ©
Bujria m >i
(PLUG SMOKING.)
Martel, the French explorer
whose discoveries under-
e attra« te«l mu< h attention,
t be ba» found In the I«e-
"Yes: she
I infs» Ail • « «svity In the
natural well." the depth of him save his mon
pend it ov
M»ts that of any other than
» ha« sounded It to tb* depth
©
VC^L Str
MASTER WORKMAN
Found Fortune anil Love.
One of th«- most Interesting romances
of tin- great Southwest lias receutly
come to light, and Miss Maxine Double-
<luy. a young school-teacher at the lit­
tle town of Laurel Valley, Tex.. Is the
heroine. Mirny years ago Maximilian
Doubleday was In love with the girl's
mother. When she marrleil Ills brother
lx- enlisted lu tlie Southern army and
tlie family lost tra«-e of him.
The soldier, however, always kept his
sweetheart's picture. Later he had a
life size portrait of it made an«l of re
«•«•tit years it lias liuug In a costly frame
In ills liauilsonie castle at Cordova.
Mexico. It was this picture which led
to the discovery of his uleee.
She has since her father's death sup-
ported herself ntid mother by her
school-teaching lu the little Texaa
town. A few months ngo she went on
a visit to Brazos County. There she
met a young man, I.w i'aysoii. who
tolil her of her marked resemblance to
the portrait of a beautiful woman
whom a friend of his loved lu Ills
youth.
“Anil It is a curious fact,” tlie young
man a«lde«l. "that Ills name Is tin- same
ns yours 1 >oul>l«-«lay. Maximilian Dou­
bleday.”
"Why, 1 wonder if it can be my lost
uncle!" th«- girl exclaimed. Further in
qillry |>rioe«l that such was the fa«-t.
A reconciliation followed.
The
wealthy I ><>ul>l««lny foun«l his boyhood
sweetheart, who Is now Ills wife. He
lias made bls niece bis heiress ami stil­
ls s«s.n to w«-«l I’ayson. the young man
fiistrutm-ntal In bringiug alsiut all this
good fortune.
19O2.A
il
S. b I b .
laa«,«.l«
U5 3f UlLlUll. A»o
lo • «O
Wlllls-n»
r«rtl»S«. Orogoo.
P. W. U.
Ne. 4M
te ad vert leere