SUPPOSE WE SMILE.
fontitn-. «• .
NEVER EAT A BREAKFAST.
Bl»/
To realize how ocean telegraphy ha« f
1’**P4. but where «;«*bOr’“»L
Inhabitant* of un l.ntire Town Fores«
affected the conditions of modern life,
the Morninu Meal.
^tber-iuLiveT/^U.
we have only to try to imagine what
Breakfasts have practically gone out HUMJROUS PARAGRAPHS FROM
CM
«iHy~a.ua
tbe world would be like without it. If
c- > of fashion lu Meadville, Pa. Tbe cru
«er.
THE COMIC PAPERS.
papa ?
dealer« in cotton or wlicat at New York
sade against them, so vigorously con
or Chicago knew nothing of the day's
OREGON
EUGENE
ducted for several years past by Dr.
prices in laiudon or Bombay, how timid
Billy-it •»
I
>>. E. H. Dvwey, has accomplished Its ob f>l:a«ant Incident« Occurrins the we
'• *•
three shouM ha^T
and coutiacted tbelr transactions would
World
Over
taxings
that
Are
Cheer
ject. Butchers, bakers and buckwheat
Vp.
The only thing that a bet proves 1» be! If all our news from Europe wer«-
ful to Old or Young Funny talec-
cake makers are threatening to more
that the man who make* It has money. a week old. how slow would be th««»«-
tioua that Everybody Will Enjoy.
to some city where theories flourish less
Her Carious.
ezchunges of opinion ami sympathy
Mrs. Boon—They
Cion reut again this mouth? This boy, I should certainly put you Iti a r«-adlly.
Don’t be discouraged If you were not which now make common interest*
J 8aI that
smith
1»
—
Jcvl ** *****
time it lias happen- corner until you promised to l«e good.’
«Teatly troubled
Dr Dewey, leader of the "no-break
voted into the hall of fame. Better a among th«* uatlous! How p«*rp!exing
Butcher—Have you any orders this nia.
Mr.
Deane
smiled.
alth*iugh
he
was
** e«l within the half-year. I ll go
fast movement,” as It is called here, be morning. ma«lam?
living nobody than a dead somebody lu and interminable would be the adjust
Mr. Hoon-Yeg-1
ment of international question*. if such there luyself ami get the money, or 1'11 getting angry. Olive went on with tliv gan to 1»- suspicious of breakfast as an
particular.
Young Wife (who is keeping house)— discovered the fa'et
utmost composure.
conferences among the government* a* know th«* reason why."
Institution some fiftern years ago. A Yes, that calf’s liver you brought me
A French aeronaut has broken the those ne«-«-s»lt.ited by the cii*i* In China
Matthew Deane was In particularly j "But a* it Is. I »hall only keep you robust meal taken directly after rising last week was very fine. I want anoth busbami talk» ,a hl,
** I
record, whereas the only things mem had to wait tbe slow < <>urae of < orrv bad humor this raw December morn- I here a prisoner until you have behav seemed to him. as he thought of IL au er one, but be sure am! get It from tbe hasn’t .lept a wink
missing *omathlag._J5“t[*
bers of that profession usually break la kpondeuce by mall! Like most dis«-over- Ing.
Everything hail gone wrong. ed. ami given me your word not to an unjustifiable Indulgence, and the Euro same calf, as my husband Is very par
tbelr neck«.
ers uml Inventor*, th«* that exi«erlmeiit Stocks had fallen when they ought to noy my aunt again for rent until she pean fashion of beginning tlie day with ticular.
Kudo^h^rf:^“^
era with o» «-an telegraphy bull<l«-«l b«-t- liavt* risen—bl» clerk had tipped over 1» able to pay you. Then, and not un coffee and rolls eminently rational In
Mast Go Her One Better,
The real poverty of riches Is lllus ter than they knew; ami the world I* the Inkstand ou his special a mJ pecu til then, will you receive your money. comparison, while fasting until uo<«n
hla daughter’» h..*
Lancastw—My wife paid J1U for a for
trated by the ca»e of the bltn«l New vastly different from what It would liar heap of paper tbe Are obstinately Do you promise? Yes or no?"
think of my chances^
seemed more sensible still.
new
bonnet,
I
’
m
sorry
to
say.
York iniUluuairo wlie offer«sl Jl.boo.tsio have been, If they had not pushed their | refused to burn in the grat«*—In abort,
“I certainly shall agree to no »uch
Harold—Very t»ir v
Hesitating at first to prescribe this
Forester—You're not half as sorry as health
and a *„„d '°n h*”lJ
to anyon«* who could restore to him hla experlm«-nt*. In the face of discourage nothing went right, aud Mr. Deane was terms." sa!<1 Mr. Deane, tartly.
regimen for his patients. Dr. Dewey I am.
•
“
OUM pull Jro^H
sight ami then fall««! to get relief.
aud
correspondingly
“Very well, str, I can waft.”
nwnt and ridicule, to a succ«*ssful cun consequent!«
trie«l the application of his theory on
“How's that?”
Miss Mellen depoaite«! the key In th» himself with such success that he has
cross.
elusion.
nursing.
•'« tq
“Why, when my wife hears of it she
Col. Du l’aty 1* Clam has at last
pocket of her gray dress and sat down ever since urgeutly advocated liielr
“Jenkins fi*
will
w
ant
one
that
costs
more.
”
been retired from the French army.
to her copying. Had she been a man
“Yes. sir.”
In the absence of any better topic ol
adoption by others.
Mother-D^1.^
Next to Est-.-rbttxy the colonel earned la dis<-UM»lon, at a recent meeting of the
“Go to the Whlow Clarkson’s and tell Mr. Deane would probably have knock
The Only Poaaible Place.
The result is that the popular break
" ®sh llay—»It around and
tlie Dreyfus case the largest »hare of Italny Day Club In New York Miss her I »hall be there in half an hour, ed her down—as it was, she wore au In
Jones—Have a good time on your va-
I»aughter-I-W,< <„„7
Infamy, which will follow him into bls Dorn Goldthwalt made the aswrtlon anil exjHK-t confidently—mind, Jenkins visible armor of ¡siwer in the very fact fast in Meadville has b«*en reduced to
its lowest terms. There are scores of tation?
the hanging gardens ’
retirement.
that women do not always tell the un —confidently to rocelve that rent that she was a fragile, slight woman,
Smith
—
Yes.
Indeed.
I
found
a
place
Dr. Dewey’s followers who eat no
ktnH eV* lf y°U are ’“tftVttM % J
qualified truth. Strange as it may money. Or else I »hall feel myself and she knew It.
breakfast u.itll noon, and many more where you didn’t hear a word about kind of stuff there Is a
Women who never read the newspa
"Miss Olive,” he said, sternly, “let
seem, »luce lying, like most other obliged to resort to extreme measures.
who limit themselves to coffee In the golf or yachts or automobiles.
pers aru still becoming the prey of big faults, is supposed to have no sex, the You understand, Jenkin»?'*
the house Just lovely
us terminate this mummery. Unlock
Jones Great Scott! What were you clothes. ”-ind;anail()11;^iur J
morning.
amists who marry for money. Every assertion arou*«-«! tremendous excite
“Certainly, sir.”
that door!”
"My theory.” explained Dr. Dewey to Jailed for?—The Smart Set.
girl should read the newspapers aisi ment To obtain a satisfactory answer
“Then don’t stand there starin' like
“Mr. I>eane. I will not!”
Katharlne^neffid’n-riTt,
I
the Sunday World’s correspondent, “Is
learn soniethlng of tbe way« of tbe to the question, "Do women lie?” It an Idiot," snarled Mr. Deane, In a sud
He Balance» Thine*.
“I shall shout and alarm the neigh-
that It Is wrong to Impose tbe task of
world, wlck«*d as some of Its ways are. should first be settled what a lie Is. if den burst of Irritation, aud Jenklua dis lsirhoo-1 then, or call a pollcemaa.”
ry him and I »ha,l f«**l al “
digestion on a body freshly r«*cuperated
by a lie Is meant the lutentlonal pur appeared like a »hot.
“Very well. Mr. Dea ne.
cruel «Ing of disappoint^
The protection of tin* woods from <ie-
by
sleep,
an«l
In
condition
to
work.
Di
pose to deceive with malicious or dis
Just half an hour afterward Matthew please.”
Nancy—Pour girl! \yeri
vastatlng tires should lie tlie next step honest end» In view, tbe woman 1» rare
Dome brush«*! the brown hair Just
She dipped her pen In the Ink and gestion, It is well known, draws heavily
tions so profoundly intere« J“® *
In the development of forestry. In who utters a He. She Is ««-idem guilty
on
the
brain
aud
nerve
forc-es,
which
spriukltsl with gray from bls square began on a fresh page. Matthew sat
“No. but it kills me to thiik .J
Southern France It Is proposed to di of the "Ik-direct” which is the nia*< u-
yet not unkindly brow. Putting on bls down, puzzled and dl»comfit«*d. and shoulil not l«e taxi'd at the beginning
ask him why he didn’t ask J. ®
vide the forests Into section«, am! sep line lie, but as to the "lie with circum
fur-lin«*l overcoat he walked forth Into watched the long lashed eyes am! faint of the «lay's work. Food should be left
arate them by planting strips of u Juicy stances,” that Is another *tory. Byr^iu the chilly winter air fully determined, ly tlnte«! cheek of his keeper. She was alone, therefore, until such time as
Trea'-«»t.
sped«.*» of cia«* tu».
defines a He as "the truth In mnsqu«*- figuratively, to annihilate the default very pretty—wbat a pity she was >«< there has been a physical waste of tis
She How dare you come bum.* J
sue which needif to be replaced by
condition, when you told me Jj
rade,” which, jierliaps, come* u« ar«-«t ing Widow Clarkson.
obstinate.
the oth- to the gentle art of lying as practiced
Uhnian who d
A rich E
food.”
only going to tbe doctori L ¿1
It was a dwarfish little r«*d brick
“Miss Olive!”
er day provided in bls will that his by women an art not only gentle tut house which api«ear«*l originally to
In support of this Dr. Dewey points
ment?
“Sir?”
daughters were to Inherit nothing If dillicult. for Teiiuyson says that "a lie have aspired to two-storyhood lot, but
He—Thash a fac’, m’ dear. He'. J
out the inraived health of Ills disciple*
“The clock has Just struck 12.”
they be«-anie the wives of American tlmt Is half the truth is tin- liarih-st lie cramped by circumstance, had settled
here. The "nobreakfast” believers, he
“I heard it.”
treatin’ me ever »ince.-MetsiM.
citizens, Pouf! We would like to »«*■ of all.” Tbe half truth is simply an down into a story and a half, but the
Magazine.
*
"I should like to go out to get some will assure you. really eat moi food,
hiA homely old «laughter« stand bealde other form of tact, am! women are con window» shone like Brazilian pebbl«-«, lunch.”
Farmer Brown—Now that corn is so
after all. than those who begin the day
To Be Popular.
some of our girls for comparison!
ceded to lie masters of tact. Nearly all and the doorsteps were worn by much
“I am sorry that that luxury Is out with a heavy meal, for their acquired gosh dern low you orter shave me for
“And you have sworn uerettone
the communications upon this subject scouring. Neither of these circum of your power.”
habit so improves their health that a half price.
What has iH-eome of the sense of are from women. Few m«*ii. Indeed, stances, however, did Mr. Deane re
The Barber—I think I ought to charge again?
demand is created for additional nour
"But I'm confounded hungry.”
"Ah. the romance of
lif«
law? Every city has Its lawl«*«s el«- would venture to express their opinion, mark as he pull«*d the glittering brass
double, because when corn’s down the
ishment.
“Are yon?”
Islied."
8
llieilt and the only safety Is to keep that though Julian Hawthorne has the cour doorknob and strode Into Mrs. Clark
farmers
wear
such
long
faces
that
I
It
Is.
of
course,
self-evident
that
every
“And I'm not going to stand this sort
“But, r pardon
•
under. But nowadays there kh - iui to age*« oliHerva that when women in son's neat parlor.
me,
every
have
to
do
double
work.
of thing any longer.”
sensible housekeeper encourages the
should have at least a sec»13
be a general Imllffereneo, nud the aver tend to be truthful "they come nearer
Thsre was a small fire—very small,
“No?”
movement as the saving of weariness
Merely ail Amateur.
age citizen leaves these little difficul sue«.*e*H than we can,” but on the oth«-r
How provoklngly nonchalant she and work Is well worth considering.
Grown Cartful.
Heiress—But, you see, you paint pic
ties to lie work«-«! out between tin- po bar.(J “they are able to fabrkat« a lie
was. Mr. Deane eyed the pocket of
When the patient Is suffering from ac tures to sell. It would never do for me
Young Wife (at a ball)—Yon »»’
lice und the mob, mid If be shows any which shall bear a ml*leadlng resem
the gray dress greedily anil walked up tual disease Dr. Dewey gue* still furth »o marry a man who works for his liv proving wonderfully as a dancer. nJ
Interest nt all It Is to watch how the blance to the truth more skillfully than
and down the room pettishly.
er and recommend* absolute fasting, ing.
you remember how you u»edto;q.-r
row will come out.
their male brethren.” The most ex
"I have an appointment at 1.”
for lie believes not only that people eat
Artist—Darling, no one could accuse dresses?
haustive discussion of the question Is
“Indeed! What a pity you will be too much, but that most ills are caused si«* of working for a living. I’ve never
Young Husband—Y-e-i; I wunjto
What Is the Amazons favorite that made by May Bushm-ll-Moody,
unabl«* to keep It.”
by «-ating. Leonard Thress of Phila »old a picture in my life.
ing ’em then.
w«n|s>n? A Chicago newspaper com who a**erts that there are instances
He took another turn across the room. delphia underwent a fifty days’ fast.
pile* u talde Hlmwing the character of where it plain, straightforward, honest
Rubber!
A Wine Woman.
Olive looketl up with a smile.
One of Dr. Dewey's most prominent
“One-half the world doesn’t i»
wenpoUH iimm I by womeu 111 several hun lie Is an absolute necessity and thor
“Are you badly hurt, Mrs. Getalong?”
Well, are you ready to promise?”
followers
is
George
Schwartzman,
who
dred ease» of assault und battery bef«ire oughly pardonable, and that "to tell a
Hang it. yes! Wliat else can I do?1 began tlie “no-breakfast”plan ten years inquired au anxious neighbor, sitting how the other half lives,” declinR
notorious female scandal monger.
the police court* during tbe pa*t year. clever untruth nt the critical moment
down by the side of the bed.
You promise?”
ago, when in poor health. He weighed
A* was to tn- expected, tbe broom ban is an admirable accomplishment.” As
“That Isn’t your fault," qiretij*
“
I
don't
know
how
badly
I'm
hurt,
”
“I do, because I can’t help myself."
IGO pounds when he liegan the experi
served one of her auditors.
die I* moat U ms I, lK-lug < bv*eu by 1SG a rule, Aowever, she believes that a
Olive drew the key from her pocket, ment, and now weighs 199 pounds. He •alii the victim of tlie railway accident,
belllgi-rent females.
But this may really tactful woman cannot get along
feebly, "until I’ve seen my lawyer.”
with softened eyes.
lias not eaten breakfast in ten years.-
Fate.
tneiin only it wa* the huudlent, not the without "her reserve fund of tiny,
“You have made me very happy, Mr. New York World.
Admirable Simulation.
Snarley—How did Jingso pa
fmorlte, we«|*in. Hairbrush«-* him ) hat harmless subterfuges,” am! that “if one
Deane. I dare say you think me un
B««ssle—Did you see* that mau making over?
pins figure connpleuously, and tlie roll never deviates from the path of truth
womanly and unfeminine, but inched
love to me a few minutes ago?
Yow—He was stooping to picket
FOOT LATCH FOR DOORS.
ing pin Is deadly in many cases. The one Is ceaselessly plunged Into all sorts
you do not know to what extremities
Carrie—Yes. There's good material horseshoe for luck.
most int<*r«*s11 ug Is tb<- cu*e of a womun of troubles, besieged with enemies, and
we are driven by poverty. Good morn Invention Which Will be Appreciated for an actor in him. Tlie Smart Set.
who went Into battle with a nursing absolutely devoid of that delightful
The Epigrammatic She,
by Busy Housekeepers.
ing, sir.”
“You seem to like hla attentions Tij
iHittl«- and *niashe«l It over her nntagon- klndnes* townril peoi>le which Is the
Merely a Hint.
If you have ever attempted to operi
Mr. Deane snllied forth with a curi
Mrs. Clublelgh—But, Henry, dear, in don't you marry him?”
1st'« head. All this seems ridiculous, bnsls of nil happiness and unity.” In
ous complication of thoughts and emo a door with both hands full you can
"Because 1 like bls sttentloM."-i
this
photograph you have but onY but
but tlier«* I* some satisfaction lu th«* other words, this lady would have us
realize
the
utility
of
the
invention
tions struggling through his brain. In
Brooklyn Life.
thought that women do not employ the believe that a He Is an offense, but a a* if every lump of nnthraclte was w|)lch gray dresses, long-lashed blue shown in the picture. It is often desir ton on your coat.
Mr. Clublelgh—Thank heaven you've
knife or tin* pistol lu «ettllng their tib Is just a cheerful evasion, and "th# hoard«*«! In the stove, am! at a table eyes ami scarlet ribbons played a prom able to keep the door between twe
The Root of All Evil.
dlfferem-i-H. In this rtwpect, at least, woman who can discriminate la-tween with writing Implements liefore her sat inent part.
rooms latch«*d ami yet to provide some noticed it at last! That’s why 1 had
A peculiar thing about wealth ll tbe
they can claim more common sense uml these two 1» Justified In using them with a young lady whom Mr. Deane at once
the
photograph
taken.
mentis
by
which
it
can
lie
readily
un
"Did you get the money, sir
asked
when you own too much of It it uwi
humanity than men.
Impunity.” it 1» noticeable th«* ques recognized as Mr». Clarkson's niece, the clerk, when he walked into the latched and swung open when It le
you.—The Smart Set.
At the Seaside.
tion la never asked, "Do men He?” It Ml»« Olive Mellen. She was not dis office.
necessary to pass through with the
Resort Hotel-keeper—Any guests in
It was regarded as a great triumph I* clievrftllly assumed they do, and. not agreeable to look ujion. though you
A Literary Genina.
"Mind your business, sir,” was the hands occupied, as, for instance, lu car this evening’s train?
“Yes,” said the Georgia farmer. *f>
won for human liberty a couple of ecu being creatures of the emotions, they would never have thought of classing tart response.
rying dishes from the dining room to
Bus
Driver
—
Nobody
to
speak
of.
Only
turles ago, win 0 the principle waa es do It directly and robustly. Tln-y rare her among the beauties, with shining
"I pity Iler husband.” thought Mr. the kitchen. To tills end Ell Henne of a single trunk woman and a grip gent,— sure Bill’s goin' to be one er these litre
tablished that nil trials of persons ao- ly fib. Wotlieil. on the other band, being black hair, blue, long lashed eyes, and Deane as lit- turned tile pai>er* over on Winnipeg, Canada, lias designed the
ary fellers, kase he can't cut two«*4
Boston Transcript.
cu»c«l of crimes uuil tnlsiletneiinors govern«*! by tliclr emotions and Imagin a very pretty mouth, hiding teeth like his desk. "How she will hetiiteck him. door attachment Illustratevi below. To
o’ wood a day, an’ he can’t nu i
must be held with open doors. The ations. while they have a horror for th«- rice kernels, *o white were they.
straight furrow to save his lif«.”-4t-
lip to Date.
By tlie way. I wonder who her bus the spindle operating the latch of the
Miss Mullen rose with a polite nod. bund will be?"
famous "fit.ir Chamber” court of th«* “lie «ttrect.” «lo not regard the "lie with
"Where did you Sunday, old man?”
lauta Constitution.
door is secured a short crank arm,
Htuarta was typical of tyranny. But circumstance" as a sin but rather as a which was grimly reciprocated by Mr.
“1 didn't Sunday; 1 Sabbathed.”
The next day he called at the Widow
Luck.
Deane.
years «if experience under free Insti ueeesaary ac<-oiupauliiieut of la.-L
“Eh?”
Clarksou’z to assure Miss Mellen that
Mr. Youngwife—My dear, tbe tailH
"I have called to see your aunt. Miss
tutions have revealed the fact that lu
“Went to church moruiug and even
be had no idea of breaking Ills promise,
A Great llooii to lliiiiinnlty.
which my money is deposited 1st
Mellen.”
i
a very large number of cases a trial In
ing.”—Detroit Journal.
nml the next but one after that he
Bloxlde
of
sodium
m-eins
to
be
one
of
broken.
“
I
know
It,
sir,
but
ns
I
am
aware
of
open court Ims u hardening and degrad
came
to
tell
the
young
lady
she
need
Mrs. Youngwife—What a ¡Deny fit
Two View«.
ing Influence on tbe p«-rsous accused, tbe greateat boons to humnulty which her timid temperament, I sent her entertain no doubt of ills Integrity. And
have got your check book at Gal
amt that with young people of previous tls- century has given that la. If th«* away. I prefer to deal with you iny- the next week lie droppeil In on them
love!
good character some choice might well reports a» to the recent demonstration aelf.”
with no particular errand to serve ns
Mr. Deane start«*«!—the cool audacity an excuse!
la- allowed aa to whether the trial of Its «¡ualltle* before the French acad
Hi» Liberal Policy.
•liould I»* open to tin* public or con emy of aclence prove to be sulistau- of thia damsel tn gray, with acarlet
“I believe In taking some tt'np!«
“When shall we be married, Olive?
ribbons in her hair, rather astonished Next month, dearest? Do not let us
ducted lu tbe presence only of tin- court tinted.
granted."
It la said that tills product possesses him.
o^kMal*. th«- necessary witnesses and
"Yes; when you lent me the aoreijg
put It off later.”
the
property
of
renewing
oxygen,
the
“I suppose the money is ready?"
attorneys. Tin* latter view lias ob-
said was so delightful I notlcri tn
"I have no wishes but yours. Mat
"No, sir. It Is not."
tiilm-d In the uenUuct of the special life sustaining principle In air. as w>-ll
leaves were not cut.”—Chicago Beewl
thew.”
"Then. Miss Olive, pardon me. I must
court established about a year «go in it* of absorblug carbonic add as it Is
"Really, Miss Olive Mellon, to hear
A Difference,
Buffalo for th«- trial of juveulle offend given off. Two men with a new ap- •peak plainly, I shall semi an officer that meek tone one would suppose
Mistress—Mary, didn’t I see you til
ers. Dm- of th«« first acta of the pres paratu« containing bloxld«* of sodium here this afternoon to put a valuation had never lock«-«! me up here
ing to the policeman this mornlnf!
ent poll«-«« Justice was to announce that are allege«! to have put on diving dress on the furniture, aiul-----•”
tyrannized over me as a jailer."
Mary—No'rn; it was hint talking k
<*a
from
which
all
air
was
excluded,
“
You
will
do
nothing
of
children would lie tried behind clo««*«l
the kind,
Olive burst Into a merry laugh.
doors. No protest appears to have and nmalned for th«* space of two Mr.”
"You dear ohl Matthew; I give
Olive’s cheek had reddened an«! her warning beforehand that I mean
been raised, and th«* plan is said to hours under the««- coniRrions. Sub*«-
Not the Same.
<|uently they remain«*! under water for eye* flash«*«! ixirtentously. Mr. Deane
have been most successful.
have my own way In everything,
Brown—I hear you are the tiipW
half au hour under similar conditions. turned toward the <toor, but ero lie
you wish to receile from your bargain?
fatlier of twins.
Th« availability of this new means knew what »lie wa« doing, olive had It Is not to«i late yet."
Effort has been inaile for some time
which Is connected with a pivoted fool
Jone»—Well, I am tbe fatb« i
to classify hydrophobia among diseases of vitalizing air In the case of sub- walked quietly acrosa the room. Iock«*l
No, Matthew Deane didn’t; he had a plate by a vertical rod. The foot plat«
twins.
Browne—Congratulate me. ohi man.
of th«« Imagination. JCven at Pasteur's marlne craft seems obvious. But Its the d«x>r, nml takeu out tlie key—then vague Idea that It would be very pleas Is balanced by a weight In such a man
Not for Him.
11 y pretty typewriter is going to bo-
In born tory faddists Insisted that th«« use Is likely to be very extended, en •h<* resume«! her »eat.
ant to I m * heupeck«-«! by Olive!
ner that It will return to its normal po
Magistrate—You may go. Jonrz •
come my wife.
"What do«*s this mean?” ejaculate«!
wild eyed children brought liter«« for abling firemen to penetrate ttie densest
sltlon immediately after the foot is re
Greene—You’re in luck. My wife In s«*e no ground for your wlfr«
treatment after twliig bitten by wolvea, stuck«* without danger of suffocation, th«* astonlslitsl “prlaou«*r of war."
moved. By changing the pivot pin t<
lietort Courteoua.
plaint
alata upon becoming my typewriter.
"It means, sir. that you will now lie
«logs or cats wert- the victims of hallu ami miners to pursue their calling saf«*-
A recent English visitor to India re a short rod and «passing It through th«
Jones (In cold perspfratf««'-w
cination. In Chicago a horse bitten by |y, by «!«*prtvlng “Are «lamp" sis! nox ol*llg<*«l to reconsld«T tbe question,"
door
a
eecond
plate
can
l>e
attached
or
I late» the following Incident of travel to
Certainty.
your honor l»e so good as to tell I*’ •
a tow (!evelop«*d blood p«>lsonlng. ac lotts gn««*« of their power to work hurm said Olive.
»bow the character of the Intercour*«* the opposite side, thus permitting th*
A woman who will forgive a man for yourself ?”
•’Obliged.”
companied with all the symptoms of ra ami death.—Boston Globe.
I between the English ami the resident door to lie o|«ene«l from either side. By forgetting her will almost love him for
bies. death resulting after horrible suf
“Tea you will hardly Jump out of Itopulatlon of that country. Th«- Par- placing the foot on either plate and ap
A General Term.
They H«-I*loiii f4«*«» Mon«*y.
strlviug to forget her, for she knows
fering. la the case of the hors«* It can
"Where did they go for their n*
It Is hart! to realize that In the moun the window, ami there I* no othyr meth sees have been «carcely longer In the plying a slight pressure the catch 1« that In this is the essence of remem
scarcely be claimed that the creature
tion?”
tain districts of Virginia, Kentucky. od of egreas unl<-** you choose to go up peninsula than have the English. They release«!, when a further movement ol brauce.—Life.
dl«-d from dread caused "by usaocia
“To the mountains.”
Tet>n«**«<*e and North Carolina there the chimney. Now. then. Mr. Dean«*, an* the ancient fire worshippers of the the foot In a horizontal direction wIS
lion of Ideas" or "hearing hydrophobia
"Wbat mountains ‘f
swing the door open.
of Course.
are many places where money 1« almost will you tell me If you a Christian East
talked about" The truth Is that rabid
“Well, I think they are Jn«t i» *
No man propos«;» to remain singie
nuknown ami skins of wild animals. man In the nineteenth c«mtury—Intend
Another Englishman and I were on
animals whose dangerous tendencies
Tlie Soothing Mosquito.
V\ hen he proposes he exp«jets to get rear of their Uncle Jim Stebbins
butt«*r and eggs and oCier commodities to sell a |*x>r willow's furniture l>e- the night train, an«! we were the sole m*-
• re rarely discovered until too late for
Thl* story com«-« from Weldon: A marrled.-l’hiladelphia Record
house down In Southern lllinaf-
are «till exchatig«*l f«w coffee nud sugar caus«* she Is not able to pay your rent? cupaut* of th«* compartment. It wa*
precautions are allow«*! too great lib
U»ten. air!"
Clevland Plain Dealer.
near mhlnight ami we were stretche«! guest at a hotel wanted to fneet as
and call«*». A recent visitor iu this re
erty among human beings. The In-
Too Technical.
Mr. Dean«* had ofiened his mouth to ou our respective couches, when our early morning train, nnd In order to b«
gion tells about seeing coon, squirrel
“He thinks it u«*«*e*sary for a poet
creating practice of permitting dogs to
remonstrate, but Olive euforc«*! h«*t slumbers were dlsturl* <1 by the en on tim<* he must be awake at 4 o'clock
A New anti Terrilying Game-
am! rabbit skins pass«*«! over the coun
to know bow to starve."
be public familiars In crowded cities Is
word.* with a very emphatic little
"The sacredneaa of home n>*.T
trance of a family of four or five I'ar- Unde Jerry Washington, a well-known
ter of a country store In exchange for
"Ye»,
he
attaches
too
much
full of peril. The torture to which they
• tamp of her foot, ami be was, as It ««*<•». among whom were a lady ami a rolored man. volunteered to call th«
lmpor-
gro«**rl«*t. The owner of th«- store said
tance to the merely technical part of be only a pbraae in I««ml- n.
are constantly exposed and fr«*quetitly
were, stricken dumb.
genious fien«i ha* invented •
that sometime« he nev«*r saw nny mon
child ami an old gentleman of some gentleman in time. Al«out half-past (
•ubje« ted is of Itself calculat«st to In
"You are what the world «*alls a rich what feeble but refim*«! appearance.
o’clock, two hours after the train had the business.”—The i^mart Set.
ey for months at a time Fonr times a
amusement for th«- kit, ben.
duce Insanity, whose conaequviiees are
man. Mr. lh*ane.
You own row* of
Dally Expreaa. “and if it become £
Of «*ourse. although we wen- not <Ila- arriv«*!. Uude Jerry put In hi» appear
year hide buyers r-’ns* out fr<«n> l.exlng
N<* Room for Argument.
not limitable to their own species. DI«
hoosea. pile* of bank stock, railroad
turlH-d. there wa* a little conversation ance. an«! when qu«*stloned a* to why
ton and take the skins off his hands.
ular servants will know zs uiu«
She
—
You
need
not
think
you
are
first
■emlnatton of disease by all varieties
»hai«w>. I«oml* an«! mortgage* -who
and discuMi.m while couches w«*re be he wa« late he «aid the moaquitoe* in my affections.
our busin«**» aa we do.
of animal life 1« now so well «**tab- Then be sends the money to Cincinnati know* what? My aunt ba* nothing -
ing prepared am! berth« let down, and were so bad he could not wake np. "Dry
for a new stock of gixuls.
Thia little pleasantry tat«*« tn» ■
Jack Hugbard «tightening hla bold)--
llsh-sl In scientific annals that cranks
I support her by copying. Now. If this
so forth, till at last my fellow-country <le* nm bully put me ter sleep!" he «x- That may lie, but you must admit that of a game by which, e«1 b
,
• ml egotists with animal fads must t«e
ca*«» b»» carr!«! Into a court of law, my
Minali Honra In War.
man. losing ills little store of patiemv. plsine«! Atlanta Constitution.
I am a pretty close second.-Tbe Smart contents of tbe waste-pa|«er
require«! to keep their pets within safe
The axprrtencr ot tbe British in fkiutl l>oor ailing aunt will tie a sufferer— roll«-«! over among his ruga
Set
tlie various rooms of the bouse •**.
» Ith a
guards for the protection of the com- Africa I» «aid to tiav«> demonstrated you wouht emerge un*«*athe<l and growl:
•The Min«trrl Wn* Infirm unit Old.*
tied upon a table, and a prize ’
profiting.
Heinity as well a« of the pets.
ou
are
not
a
bad
man.
Mr.
tbe eupertority of «mall horses to largs
Rising Them Up,
”1 wish yon would »top that chatt«
The Literary World publish«*« «
<*«! to the first lngenlou» and «left
one« •« draft animal* In the field of Dean«; you have a great many noble Ing. yon Parsce«!”
How
do
you
like
your
new
quar
*ch<*oll*iy’« criticism of Sir Walter
«■«1 man »errant or maid »«*rr**
an«! I Ilk«* you for them.” ¡
It la only fifty yesrs slu«-e th«> possi iHiatiUtle«. The small beasts can ge qoailt
To which remark, when they had «et- Scott In an exam.nation pa|«er. as fol ter*." asked tbe landlady pleasantly. pntw nn<» rfimplHe letter
I*
hr
I«au««-I
an
Instant
and
look«*!
In-
Tbe new tenant lu the modern apart
blllty of «endtiig telegraphlc mesaage* longer without f««««d. It la «aid. can «Io
th*«! themselves a little, one of the tn«'a low* "Walter Ik-ott wa» a great poet
Think of the joy <*f tbe
a toi er thè «• -a was first e.tabllstasl; ami Just as much work, and make a smaller tently am! rrav«*ly at Mr. I»eane. The replied:
he a a* a lawyer, but people lore«! him ment house hstked the riH IUi over sati the coatent« of letters, wb.cb yj*
color roee to hla cheek it wa» not ills
ly
and
rejoined;
"These
aren't
quar
tbr i-nglnei r wbo dires te«! thè laylng of targ«>< for the enemy.
"Please go to sleep now. Mr. G
When he was dyeing he felt It comlni
torn, as you f«m<11y beU*''’^-
-
a<r«'«'at>le to be told by a prvtty young
These are eighth».’’—Washing*
thè first ooean cable, frotn Dover to thè
man!"
on. so he wrote sum touching lines ter».
»mall piece» to t>e restored, »r#
He«-* that A euttlale th«- Hive.
girl
that
»he
llk«*d
him.
on
auy
tern»,
ton
Star.
Fremii «Uff» --u tbe «itber side of thè
which h«* meant for himself;
In each Iweblve are a number of uurw- yet »lie had Imlulg«*«! in pretty plain
public!
____
Engtish < lianisel. la stili Uvlng n Kug
Wat« h-t’hain of Pencil Ml«m.-*.
'rhe way wa« long the win«! was cold
'.ng be«-«, w ho «Io not go out to gather •peaklug. "I have beard.” »he wetit
M«:fi*h
Man.
Cariosity <*f F«*«>i-Ib»' IM _ J
A l<ewl*ton. Me., man has a curl il? The minstrel wa* infernal old.’
lau«! The cabla aoou ceaaed to work, honey, but look after th«- egg* and
She - petulantly)-1 don’t see why you
but It was the precursor of the Atlantic young, and a certain number are al- on. “of your doing kirnl action» when watch chain made of peach »ton«-» •N». may we all f.-el tbe same wbrt
One hundred yards has >'
should
hesitate
to
get
married
on
$3.<jt<)
yon
«>■
.
lu
the
humor
of
it.
You
can
Each of the nine «ti*ne« I* carve«! on death catches bob! of aa.”
cable which waa paid out from th* way« told off to ventilate a hire These
teu secón«!», but fifty yard*
* year. Papa says my gowns never
do them, aad you shall In thl» Instance each side In a different device, so that
Great Eastern tn I
and of the one
en*l
In five »<*con«ls.
•tam! close to the .«utran.-e ami fan \ou sre «-roea this morning, you know
co«t more than that.
there are eighteen different design*.
hnndred and «eventy thousan«! mllea of
ir<
•trvngly with their wing«
He
—
But.
my
darling,
we
must
bare
you
sre
’
Hush
no
ex«-u*«*;
you
are
the youth in lo™
The atones are Joined with bar« of
«wvoti <*able now In ojienitlon. The dl«
•omethfng
to
eat.
wlfl»h ami IrtitaNr «ml ov«*vbear!ng’ If g««l<l. th« whole making a rub aud
twq pia'-** H» ‘i»e Jturl-1 o
•overlea of «ine getw-ratfeMi tieomie tbe
Tb* tlrvaoine «Munir trlwu» to make.
"Ob. William. Always thluklag of sw«*etheart is and tbe «libe-
1 ear«- your mother, and y«*u a UtUr novel «.Lain.
iBtJaqeUaabl« cv»« eSU«IK'«ra of tbe Urli la length for hl* deficiency ta «hÿtA.
your stixnacb. -Llfa.
laut.
EUGEtfE WEEKLY GUARD.
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