u u
lYNOPtlS. ,
CHAPTER I-F1red by tlx news of tbe
tlnklac of the Lualtanla by a German
iubmarina, Arthur Guy Kmpey, an Amarl
san, laane hka offlca la Jaraay City ud
foe to England wbare b enuats In tbe
. British army.
CHAPTER n-Aftar a parted of train
bif , Empey vohintears (or Immedlata err.
Ic and tooa ftodi hlmsalf In rut billet!
"aomawhera la Franca." whara ha Ant
makaa tha aequalBtanc at tha evar-prae-
CTIAJTKR III Empay attend! hli flrtt
church wnrlcaa at tha front whlla a Oar
nan Fokkar circle ovar tba eongracatloa.
CHAPTER IV Empey'a command (oaa
bito tha front-Una tranchaa and la unoar
Are (or tha drat tlma.
CHAPTER V Em pay laarni to adopt
tba motto ot tha Brtlsh Tommy, "If you
ara going to fat It, you'll fat It. as aavar
CHAPTER TI Back In raat biitaia, Em
pay aata bl firtt azperlanoa aa a maas
Ordrly.
CHAPTER TII-Empar laarni how tba
Brltlah aoldlara ara fad. . .
CHAPTER Yrn-Back In tha front-Una
tranch, Empey taai bl first fiiand of tba
tranchaa "to Wt"
CHAPTER IX-Jtmpey makaa hli flrat
Tlalt to a dufout la "Sulcida Ditch,"
CHAPTER X-Empey laarni what cob
atltutaa a "day' work" In tba front-Una
trench.
CHAPTER XI-Empey foa "OTr tba
top" (or tha flrat tlma la a charge on tha
German trenches and la wounded by a
bayonet thro
R Xn-Empey Jotni tha "tut
'' . J tha borobln Muad la called,
CHAPTER Xuf-Eacb Tommy fat an
official bath.
CHAPTER XIT-Empey help dtf an
advanced troacb under German lira.
CHAPTER XY-On "Ustanlnf port" la
No Man's Lnd.
' CHAPTER XVI-Two artilleryman "put
one over" on Old Pepper, their regimental
onmraaoAar.
CHAPTER XTO-EmpeyhM VV?:
capa whlla on patrol duty In No Hang
TTIAPTER XVin-Back m lest bfflatf
Emritea aPl.Uget a tare comedy,
waya to amuaa tbemaalvaa whlla "on their
CHAPTER XX-Empey volunteer for ,
machine gun aemoe a --
the front-Una trenche.
coBC-aa S Ulled an4 - wounded.
wui m nwuea to yon ror yrfOr ret a
journey to your respective stations.
Beastly rotten, I know." Then be left
A dead alienee resulted. Then men
started to curse, threw their rifles on
the floor of the car; others said notu-J
tag, seemed to be stupefied, while some
had the tears running down their
cheeks. It was a bitter disappointment
4 to all.
How we blinded at the engineer of
that train; it was all his fault (so we
reasoned) ; why hadn't be speeded up a
little or been on time, then we would
have gotten off before the order ar
rived? Now It was no BUghty for us.
That return Journey was misery to
ns ; I Just can't describe It
. When we got back to rest billets, we
found that our brigade was In the
trenches (another agreeable surprise)
and that an attack was contemplated.
J Seventeen of tbe forty-one will never
get auot'.ier chance to go' on leave;
tney were killed in the attack. Jist
think if that train had been on time,
those seventeen would still be alive. -;
1 hate to tell you how I was kidded
by tha boys when I got back, bnt It was
good and plenty.
Our machine gun company took over
their part of the line at seven o'clock,
the night after I returned from my
near leave.- ,!. it
. At 8:30 the following morning three
waves went over and captured the first
and second German trenches. The
machine gunners went over with the
fourth wave to consolidate the cap
tured line or "dig In," as Tommy calls
It
i Crossing No Man's Land without
clicking any casualties, we came to
the German trench and mounted our
guns on the parados of same.
I never saw such a mess in my life
bunches of twisted barbed wire lying
about, shell boles everywhere, trench
all bashed in, parapets gone, and dead
bodies, why, that ditch was full of
them, theirs and ours. It was a regu
lar morgue. Borne were mangled hor
ribly from our shell fire, while others
were wholly or partly burled in the
mud, the result of shell explosions cav
ing in the walls of tbe trench. One
dead German was lying on his back,
with a rifle sticking straight np in the
air, the bayonet of which was buried
to the hilt in his chest Across his feet
lay a dead English soldier with a bul
let hole in his forehead. This Tommy
must have been killed Just as he ran
' his bayonet through the German.
Blfles and. pnulDment were scattered
ARAMBKM 50IMR
WIIOWINT
MAOflEOJfiflER.BVINCIHfRAffCE' '
Oll7 BY
aouui, ana occasionally a nan mw
could be seen sticking out ot tha mod.
- At one point Jnst In tbe entrance to
a communication trench, was a stretch
er. On this stretcher a German was
lying with a white bandage around bis
knee, near to him lay one ot the
stretcher-bearers, the red cross on bis
arm covered with mud and his helmet
filled with blood and brains. Close by,
atttlnf np against the wall ot the
trench, with head resting on his cheat,
waa the other stretcher-bearer. Be
teemed to be alive, the posture was to
natural and easy; but when I got
closer I could see a large, Jagged hole
In his temple. The three must have
been killed by the same shell-burst
The dugouts were all smashed In and
knocked about big square-cut timbers
splintered into bits, walls caved In and
entrances choked.
Tommy, after taking a trench, learna
to his sorrow that the hardest pat of
the work is to hold It
In our case this proved to be to.
Tbe German artillery and machine
gnna bad na taped (ranged) for fair;
It was worth yoor Ufe to expose your
self an Instant
Dont think for a minute that the
Germane were the only sufferers; we
were clicking casualties to feat that
you needed an adding machine to keep
track ot them.
Did yon ever see one of the tteam
shovels at work on the Panama canal t
Well, It would look like a hen scratch
ing alongside of a Tommy "digging In"
while under fire. You coolant see day
light through the clouds ot dirt from
his shovel. '
After losing three out of six men of
our crew we managed to set np our
machine gun. One of the legs of the
tripod was resting on the chest of a
half -burled body. When tbe gun was
firing, It gave tbe Impression that the
body was breathing. This was caused
by the excessive vibration.
Three or four feet down the trench,
about three feet from the ground a
foot waa protruding from tbe earth.
We knew It was a German by the black
leather boot One of our crew need
that foot to hang extra bandoliers of
ammunition on. This man always waa
a handy fellow; made use of little
points that the ordinary person would
overlook.
' The Germans made three counter
attacks, which we repulsed, bnt not
without heavy loss on our side. They
also suffered severely from our shell
and machine-gun fire. Tbe ground was
spotted with their dead and dying.
Tbe next day things were somewhat
quieter, bnt not quiet enough to bury
the dead.
We lived, ate and slept In that trench
with the nnburied dead for six days.
It was awful to watch their faces be
come swollen and discolored. Towards
the last the stench was fierce.
What got on my nerves the most was
that foot sticking out of the dirt It
seemed to me, at night In the moon
light, to be trying to twist around.
Several times this impression was so
strong that I went to It and grasped it
In both hands, to tee If I could feel a
movement
I told this to tbe man who hatf used
It for a batrack just before I lay down
for a little nap, as things were quiet
and I needed a rest pretty badly.
When t woke up the foot was gone.
Be had cut It off with our chain saw
out of the spare parts' box, and bad
plastered the stump over with mud.
During the next two or three days,
before we ere relieved, I missed that
foot dreadfully; seemed as if I had
suddenly lost a chum.
I think tbe worst thing of all was to
watch the rats, at night end some
times in tbe day, run over and play
about among the dead.
Near our gun, right across the para
pet, could be seen the body of a Ger
man lieutenant the bead and arms of
which were banging into our trench.
The man who had cut off tbe foot used
to sit and carry on a one-sided conver
sation with this officer, used to argue
and point out why Germany was in the
wrong. During all of this monologue
I never beard him say anything out of
the way anything that would have
hurt the officer's feelings had he been
alive. He was. square all right;
wouldn't even take advantage of a
dead man in an argument , ' 4
To civilians this must seem dread
ful, bnt out here one gets so used to
awful eights that It makes no Impres
sion. In pawing a butcher shop you
are not shocked by seeing a dead tur
key hanging from a hook. Well, In
France, a dead body la looked upon
from the same angle.
But nevertheless, when our tlx days
were up, we were tickled to death to
be relieved.
Our machine gun company lost
seventeen killed and thirty-one wound
ed In that little local affair ot
"straightening the line," while the
other companies clicked It worse than
we did.
After the attack we went Into re
serve billets for six days, and on tbe
seventh once again we were In rest bit-
( :;l'-i."V;-'
CHAPTER XXII.
Punishments and Maehlne-Qun Stunta.
Soon after my arrival In France; In
fact from my enlistment I had found
that In the British army discipline la
very strict One baa to be very care
ful In order to stay on the narrow path
of government virtue.
There are about seven million waya
ot breaking the king's regulations; to
keep one you have to break another.
The worst punishment Is death by a
firing squad, or "up against the wall,"
aa Tommy calls It
This Is tor desertion, cowardice, mu
tiny, giving Information to the enemy,
looting, rape, robbing the dead, forcing
a safeguard, striking a superior, etc.
Then comes the punishment of sixty
four days In the front-line trench with
out reltet During this time yon have
to engage In all raids, working partlea
In No Man's Land, and every hazardous
undertaking that comes along. If yon
live through tbe alxty-tour daya yoi
are Indeed lucky.
This punishment Is awarded where
there la a doubt as to the willful guilt
of a man who baa committed an of
fence punishable by death.
Then comet the famous field pun
ishment Na L Tommy has nicknamed
It "crucifixion.", It mean! that a man
la spread-eagled on a Umber wheel,
two hours a day for twenty-one daya.
During this time he only gets water,
' bully beef and biscuits for bla chow.
Ton get "crucified' for repeated minor
offenses.
Next In order It field punishment
No. JL ,
This It confinement In the "clink,"
without blankets, getting water, bully
beef and biscuits for rations and doing
all tbe dirty work that can be found.
This may be for twenty-four hours or
twenty days, according to the gravity
of the offense.
Then comes "pack drill" or default
era' parade. This consists of drilling,
mostly at the double, for two bears
with full equipment Tommy hates
this, because it It bard work. Some
times he fills bla pack with straw to
lighten It nd sometimes he gets
caught If he gets caught be grouses
at everything In general for twenty
one days, from the vantage point of a
limber wheel
Next comes "C. B." meaning "con'
fined to barracks." This consists of
staying In billets or barracks for twenty-four
hours to seven days. Ton also
get an occasional defaulters' parade
and dirty Jobs around the quarters.
Tbe sergeant major keeps what it
known as the crime sheet When a
man commits an offense, be Is
"crimed," that Is, bis name, number
and offense Is entered on the crime
sheet Next day at 9 a. m. he goes to
the "orderly room" before the captain,
who either punishes him with "C. B."
or sends him before the 0. C. (officer
commanding battalion). The captain
of the company can only award "C. B."
Tommy many a time has thanked
the king for making that provision In
his regulations.
To gain the title of a "smart soldier,"
Tommy has to keep clear of the crime
sheet and yon have to be darned smart
to do It
I have been on It a few timet, most
ly for "Yankee impudence."
During our stay of two weeks In
rest billets our captain put ns through
a course of machine-gun drills, trying
out new stunts and theories, ,.
After parades were over, our guns
crews got together and also tried out
some theories of their own In reference
to handling guns. These courses had
nothing to do with the advancement of
the war, consisted mostly of causing
tricky jams In the gun, and then the
rest of the crew would endeavor to lo
cate as quickly aa possible the cause
of tbe stoppage. This amused them
for a few days and then things came to
standstill.
One of the boys on my gun claimed
that he could play a tune while the
gun was actually firing, and demon
strated this fact one day on the target
range. We were very enthusiastic and
decided to become musicians. ' ' ;
After constant practice I became
quite expert In the tune entitled "All
Conductors Have Big Feet"
When I had mastered this tone, our
two weeks' rest came to en end, and
once again we went up the line and
took over the sector in front of G -
At this "point tbe German trenches
ran around the base of a hill, on the
top of which was a dense wood. This
wood was infested with machine guns,
win, and aweep the streets of t little
village, where we were billeted while
In reserve.
There waa one gun In particular
which need to get our goats, It had tbe
exact range of oar "elephant" dugout
entrance, and every morning, about the
time rations were being brought up, Its
bullett would knock np the dust on the
road; more than one Tommy went
West or to Blighty by running Into
them. x
This gun got our nerves on edge,
ud Frits teemed to know it, because
he never gave ua an hour's rt Our
reputation aa machine gunners was at
stake; we tried various ruses to locate
and put this gun out of action, but
each one proved to be a failure, and
Frits became a worse nuisance than
eger. He waa getting fresher anymore
careless every day, took all klmls of
liberties with ua thought he waa In
vincible. .
Then one of our crew got a brilliant
Idea and we were alt enthusiastic to
put It to the test . . ,
Here was his scheme;
When firing my gun, I wnt to play
my tune, end Frits, no doubt would
fall for It, try to Imitate me aa an
added Insult This gunner and two
others would try, by the sound, to lo
cate Frits and his gun. After having
got tha location, they would mount
two machine guns In trees, In a little
clump of woods to the left of our ceme
tery, and while Frits was In the middle
of his lesson, would open up snd trust
to luck. By our calculations, It would
take at least a week to pull oft the
atunt t
If Frlti refused to awallow our bait
It would be Impossible to locate bis
special gun, and that's the one we were
after, because they all sound alike, a
slow pup-pup-pup.
Our prestige waa Wanting by t
thread. In the battalion we had to en
dure all klndt of Insults and fresh re
marks aa to our ability In silencing
Frits. Even to the battalion that Ger
man gun waa a sore spot '
Next day, Frits opened up as usual,
I let him fire away for a while and
then butted in with my "pup-pup-pup?
pup-pup-pup." I kept this np quite a
while, used two belts of ammunition.
Frits had stopped firing to listen. Then
he started In; sure enough, be had
fallen for our game, his gun was trying
(a lmUta pjlqa, but at first ha mada a
Trains into Monmouth
L've Portland 71.5, a m, Gerlinger 10:20, Independ'ce 10.32, Monm'th 100
" Salem 9.X5, , " . , . "
", ,1.40, pm,. ....... ....Dallas 2:45 ; " 8:10
" ; " , 8.45, " Gerlinger M, Independence 457, Monmouth 4:66
"" ' " 6.00. " , . 6:45... . " . 6:57, " , 7:10
'" Portland 8.30, Connects with above ' , . -(
" Corvallis 6.45, a m ...... Independence 7:85.'... Arrive Monmouth 7:46
" " 1-15, p m ..." 2:14 2:30
" Dallaa 7.00, a m, Arrive Monmouth 7:25
' Airlie 8.30, a m and 8:45, pm. Arrives Monmouth 9:05 a m and 4:13 p m
Leave Independence, 6.50 am, 7.35, 8.45, 10.85, 12.20, 1.80, p m, 2.20, 3.60,
4.40, 7.00
Trains out of Monmouth
L've Monmouth 7:05 t m. Independence 755, Gerlinger 7:49, Ar Salem 850
" Same as above Portland 11.10
' " Monmouth 1:45, p m, " 2:14. : " 2:27, Salem 8;10
" Same aa above Portland 6:60
" Monmouth 4:05, " 4:40, " 4X5, Salem 5:30
" " .9:05, am Dallas 10:00 .. ,1. "11:00
" " 4;30, pm . " 4:45, " 6:85
" " 9;05, a m, Independence 10:32, Corvallis 1120
" " 4;55,pm, " 6X7, "7:45
7;25 a m and 8;10 p m. Arrives Airlie 8 a m and 8;40 pm
Leave Monmouth 7.06, a m, 8.15 9.05, 10.50, 12.30, M, 1.46, p m, 2.36, 4.15,
4.56, 7.1J !- ..
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'-' i. ?;
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horrible mesa of that tune. Again I
hutted In with a few bars and stopped. ,
TUu he tried to copy what I had
played. He was a good sport all right
because hit bullets were glng away
over our beads, must have been firing
into the air. I commenced to feel
friendly towardbtin.
This duet went on for flvf daya.
Frits waa a good pupil and learned
rapidly, In fart, got better than hie
teacher, I commenced to feel Jealous.
When be had completely mastered the
tune, he started sweeping the road
again and we clicked It worse than
ever. But be signed hit death warrant
by doing to, because my friendship
turned to bate, Every time he fired he
played that tune and wt danced. .
The boys In tht battalion gave na
tbe "na! Ha!" They weren't In on
our little freroeup.
The originator ot Ihe rose tod the
other two gunners had Frtti's location
taped to the minute; they mounted
their two guns, and also gave me the
range, Tha next afternoon was set for
the grand finale,
Our three guns, with different eleva
tions, had their fire to arranged, that
opeulng np together, their bulleta
would suddenly drop on Frits Dkt a
hailstorm.
About three the next day, Frits start
ed "pun-pupping" that tune. I blew
sharp blast on a whistle, It waa the sig
nal agreed nponi we turned loose and
Frtti's gun suddenly Mopped In the
middle of bar. We had cooked hit
goose, and our rose had worked. After
firing two belts each, to make sure ot
our Job, we hurriedly dismounted our
guns and took cover In the dugout We
knew what to expect toon. We didn't
have to; wait long, three aatvoa of
"wblss-banga" camt over front Frits's
artillery, further confirmation that
we bad sent that mnslcal machine-gunner
on his Westward-bound Journey.
That gun never bothered na again.
We were the heme of the battalion,
our captain congratulated us, said It
was t neat piece ot work, and, conse
quently, we were all puffed up over tbe
ttunt
There are several ways Tommy uses
to disguise the location of his machine
gun and get hla range. Some of the
most commonly used stunts are aa fol
lows: At night when he mounts his gun
over tho ton at hla ac-fc
President
Vice-Pres
Asst-Cashier