« C HR fSTIAN Wise and Otherwise. —Erskine puzzled the wits of his acquaintance by inscribing on'a tea-chest the words Tu • doces.” It was some time before they found IT li l t A T/D. PORTLAND ADVERTISEMENTS. » 77ie readers of the H erald will \ jJease observe that, no advertisements are inserted e.wepl those we het levs to be trustworthy. m. writing to or call- in'g on our advertisers, fease say you F. R. CHOWN 2k. IFS.OZBTSH.TS, 1 SpX’ESßORTO O’ Corner First anil Allée Str., T- Importer and Dealer in FISHEL & ROBERTS, PORTL A N D . ............... TiïF^ir....... IIAHDWA ' 145 First Street C hristian H erald . 7'his will ac- OREGON. PORTLAND, tion—“ Thou teachest.” commodate both, them and, us. 112-lf-tf —It is heart-rending to make such corrections, but it is very ne­ GARRISON’S OF OREGON, O C. BLANEY, M, D cessary sometimes. “ In speaking Guarantees to sell the very best Clothing for less money than any other house in the State. of the president of our lqca.1 bank, PHYSICIAN and SURGEON 167, 3rd St., 12-12-tf last week.’- savs a country journal, PfiBTT.lliD, f.BF.GUN Office—Plummer à Eyerie»’s Drug Store, for ‘ He "skedaddled ’ please read BUCKEYE BELL FOUNDRY, Cor. first and Main bt. Rfl Is of Pure Copper and Tin for Chiiri*bes, ‘ His schedule.’” —— JOHN B.GARRISON, Proprietor. Schools, Fire Alarms,Fanns, etc. FULLY Residence—32 Jefferson St., Cur. fccond.St. WARRANTED. Catalogue sent Fr<-< . 12-1-ly —“ Were you never in a court of ' (ieneral dealer in all 1 ihds of Sewing VANDUZEN & TIFT, Cincinnati, O Machines Attachments, Oil, Needles, Ac. justice before ?” asked a judge of a Sewin" ^a^hjnes repaired and warranted If \»anr tu l>uy a uood Sewing Machine call or witness who was conducting him- you send for information Illustrated catalogues 12-3-tf uelf in a very unseemly manner sent when desired. Norris R. Cox. “ No, never,” replied the man, “ but J. G. Glenn, I’ve often been up before the.mag,1 GLENN & COX, nitrates.”-. It is said that not a single or 147 THIRD ST. PORTLAND DENTIST, married—proprietor of a Sunday —........--------—-——yr——... .. . , beer garden was struck with an S. W. Cor. Firat and Yamhill St«., \ “ LLD ” this summer. It 'must PORTLAND, : : : : OREGON. have been a narfow escape, for Office House—From, 8 -r, m . 14-3m these degrees were Hying around Residence, 291 Second Street. with grfeat numerosity.———~~ DR. E. O. SMITH ÜKEU1N _____ —“ I n a n e v il ho u r J became ad- dieted to drink, from that -moment' I have been going down, down, PIANOS r street, uet. Mori'laon down, until I have become an out­ Yamhill, Portland, Or. '■ cast, a loafer—of no account—fit HAINES BROS., J. B. NUGENT ¿ i for nothing on this earth but to lie CO, GRAND, SQUARE AND a member of Congress.” N atural P hilosophy .—“Why UPRIGHT PIANCS a does lightning so rarely strike twice in the same place?” asked a school teacher of the new • boy in the class of natural philoso­ phy. “ Oh,” said the boy, “ because it never neetjs to ?” i I SHEET MUSIC AND MUSICAL MERCHANDISE —When a man says apologeti- Semi for Catalogue. cally, “May I have just one word . with you in private, sir ?” you may be quite sure that that one word is DEALER IN “ Greenbacks.” lucading —It is a little singular, although A no less true, that one small, but well-constructed fly will do more —AND— towards breaking up a man’s after­ noon nap than the out door racket of a full brass-band, mj matter who Executed in Italian and American marble. the leader is. Also, every variety of Cemetery and other Stone work, Grani'o —A venerable young gentleman, Monuments, anil enclosures to burial This, furnished to order. four years old, recently threw his LO-pftosile The Ope#* Hxinwr Saleim- -Ab>o, Steiger B+oUrera, material relative into irtltot’ adTiii " Albany, Oregon. ration bj' the following speech : “ I like most all kinds of cake- pound Boonusc THE ONLY INSTITUTION OF ITS KIND ON THE COAST^ cake, sponge cake, and jelly cake— KUNS LIGHTER, EASIER, AND IS Wheroa young lady or gunMeman can obtain a Thorough Buniixwi Education _ More Durable than any other niachiuo Ata 1’ or I in pro|Mirt>on& o time but I don’t like stomac ache.” made. Wc guaran'oc it to Out-wear any two shuttle niuchinoa. It will darn taaetifnlly, —No matter how good-natured a letter, make insertion and embroider wttund I man may be, he will invarfAbly get (»»»>/ alhfeliiHPiil. A fill set of attachments] mad when he disc »vers tliat there giten with each npuilpne, lpaving no pxtrai t<> bny. It is the hgliteal ninnpijj Topk’ siitcli is no towel in n the une roomjpana room'** and i.. is machine in the ’»orld, ‘ami ladies wishing to C 'uipejied to <| |ry hid face oh the preserve their health should investigate its merits. All should givo it t a trial. Macbiues Alac|nu<-.s -A , bed qui|t. djsen. Addivs happily together," i>. u. Box 5U.Í. W.H.JAME«» 1’1’1 nd pal-. Clothier, Merchant Tailor and Hatter Seeing Machine Store, THE CIÎÏ DRY GOODS STORE ESTEY & STERLINf O RG ANS. THE “NEW No. 8 g wm T staiger ON UM ENTS, Head-Stones r 12-A-ly »---------------------------------------------- 7 TABLETS