General Debility
Pay In and out there Is that feeling of
wraklicas tlmt makes a burden of Itself.
I'ood doc not strengthen.
fileup does nut refresh.
It In hard to do, hard to lirnr, what
Should lia easy, vitality Is on the ebb, and
Ilia whole system stiffen,
l'or thin condition titko
Hood's Sarsaparilla
It vltallr.es thu blood, gives vigor ami tone
to all the organs and (unction), anil It
positively iiiirniiallrtl for nil run-down or
debilitated renditions.
lloou' I'lLI.a our aonatlpatlon, 24 cull.
Incluilvt.
She No, I can never marry you.
All our (itinily In, opposed to you.
I In Hut you nro not
Blie I said all our fiunlly.
This algnatur la on titty txi of the genuine
Laxative Bronio-Qiiiiiiiic Tablets
tb rtmwljr that rurfu n cold In one day
A I'lne Memory.
"Ilrown must havo n hud memory;
Jin Iiiih owed mo .flO for two youro,"
"You uro mistaken ; liu has u very
eood memory; lio always room across
ho street In jmMliiK your olllco."
Mothers will (hid Mm. Wlmlow's Booth.
Ins Bynip tlio best rcinrdy to use lor tliclr
clillilrsn during the teething ixjrlod.
The Chaijci.
Willlo I'ii, teacher tolil us to 1m
prepared tomorrow to toll wlmt meter
tlio "Chargo of tlio l.lt;lit Brigade"
in In.
I'n T I mt'n easy. One motor, of
course.
CITQ r.rm.n.atlr Oorwl. No nts et hmouiucd
rl lO fir nnl.UT'i.i.-Mf lir.Kll.'lr,tNm
Jl.iturvi. rwn.Uur l'ltltlt8'i.00ttUIMlUntUr.
i.. Ila.1l.ll KLls,U4..VtcliSL,l,llil.l.lila.l'a,
Told the Whole Story.
Mistress (to servant nliout to leave)
Mary, wlmt kind of reference shall
1 write for you?
Mary Oh, say I stayed with you
for six mouths; that'll do.
Ejttuctly.
"What aro you doing there?" cried
the farm dog as he ohsurved the hen
in tho coal liln.
"Oh, I thought this was a good
time to lay in coal," cackled tho hen.
TO CUItK A COLD IN ONE DAT
Take iAiallv llrnmo Qulalns Tablet. All
truif lit refund Itit money lilt tails to cure.
. W, Oroya's alsnaiure lion leach box. Tie.
The Financier.
Gaul Hay, lend mo $10, will you?
I'll givo it hack to you today. I want
it to decide a bet.
Kloso All right, Here you are.
What was the hot?
Gaul Smlthera bet ino 10 that I
could not borrow $10 from you.
LADIES WANTED
llr en old rrlUliln firm la du ll.tl.nt.rs, nmbrolcl.
ry and all kind. t,t Kanr-jr Work rur ue l liom.
faradr nurk and simmI my. aiaidjrnrl.Lur. liftura.
Kur Information a-n.l sump to I'arLtan Needle
work Co., M Uearlmrn Hi., ciilrxo. III.
Mat Other Namci.
Cliureh Did you know that Styles
lias a name for his automobile?
Gotham No: what is It?
"Why, he calls it Madcap Violet."
"Well, that isn't what lie called it
when it broke down ten miles from
any habitation."
Itawars nf Ointments for Catarrh That
Contain Mercury,
As mercury will aurelr dettroy tbe eeneo of
melt and completely derange the whole eye
tern wheneuterlns It tbroush the mucoimur.
faces, finch arilclei thould neier be uied ex
cept on prescriptions from reputable physi
cians, at the damage they will do is ten fold to,
the good you can ponlbly derive from thcui.
Hall's Catarrh Cure, manufactured by P. J,
Cheney It Co., Toledo. O.,coniatne no mercury,
andli taken Internally, acting directly upon
the blood and mucoui aurfacea of tbe lyitem.
In buying Hall's Catarrh Cure be sura you get
tbo genuine. It U taken Internally, and made
In Toledo, Ohio, by J". J. Cheney a Co. Test!
nonlala free,
Hold by Uruggliti, price 75c. per bottle.
ilall'e Family I'llls are the beau
Culinary.
"There nro only two kinds of
j? cooks."
"For instance?"
"Thoso that can't cook and will
cook and thoso that can cook and
won't."
pi and
. ...
Hi . ,1 . . . i i lie
Bad Circulation is wc cause oi musvui uu ci ;
advaKars there Is a decline of strength and vigor Uic mach in eryof the
Sdv woves with less speed nnd accuracy. Because of the weak and irregular
LZ the heart the flood moves moreslowly, becomes impure and .loses mjidj
if. ltf.A,,tilnlnir nronertles. and muscles, t ssues and nerves literally starve for
?cl of ncrishme P"ted circulation is followed by a long
Uata if todS ailments. ColS feet, chilly sensation, un and do,vn the spine poor
"a.f,' iffeiuon soreness of the muscles, rheumatic pains, hard nnd fissured
Itaf.SrM the' lower limbs nnd'other parts ot the
K A iheAd manr other diseases pecul ar to old people are due to a lack of
LlffthbloXnd&ect
O," Whn up nVd rurificatlon of the blood, thus adding strength and tone to
Wd? iS.X tt tonic, mskeslt
Our medical; ' dHkto h their opinion nnd advice in your
and skin diseases. UyW.f" rMelve such information and advice as
onbewn co free.
lUcandBkmCaseamaUe ATLANTA. OA.
Art end Nature.
Miss I'rtido Yes; our choral
society Is going to present it comic
opera, but I won't take part. They
expect me to wear tights, hut I could
not do that.
MIm Hharpe Why not? You
might get them padded, you know.
Unncciitry.
Teacher Now, "Tommy Hllnkins,
if you had two nnples un.l wanted to
givo Johnny J-recklenose one, you
would tell him to take the larger one,
wouldn't you?
Tommy Naw.
Tcnolior Why not?
Tommy Wouldn't havo tor. llo'd
take it anyway.
A I'nrtmia to lie Olvari Away.
A noted philanthropist luia drcldril to
give away his fortune to charities mid no
doubt much koi id will I hi neooniplUlied.
There Is nnotlirr agencv that line , iilr ae
coiuplMidl liuirli kooiI, iiiuitrly, Hostel
ler's Ktiniiiirli lllltrrs, thn iiiedlclnn llli
llfty years of cure Imck of it. It pmoioii's
niipctltc, lumirt's dlKftl'iM, cures, iiysppp.
afn, reirulitlrs the liver nnd keeim ihr
lionets regular, ills' preveiiis liclelilui;,
lirarthiiru or llatiilenoy. Don't full to try
It, but be Hire and Ket the ceiilllne, ,
Restoring.
Old nriiiMiniuii In riitlii'ut' iwirliirl
I'orter, tlie ruin is dropping in from
thn Inttin ludn itll rtvir ittv fdritlios.
Porter (reiiHsnrlngiy) No, sir; it's
qiilto watertight, I assure you, That's
ouiy mo on leaning.
Secretary of Confederate Navy.
Col. James O. Milner, who died re
cently at Milford, O., was once secre
tary of the navy lor the confederacy.
He died very poor, yet before tho war
was ono of thu richest men in the
South.
Making Up the Pack.
"Somebody calls attention to the
fact that every new war ship is the
queen of tho navy."
"I rather think that the transport
that turned over the other day is tho
joker.'
VOO KNOW WHAT YOU AUK TAKING
When von take Orore'a Taitetcne Chill Tonic,
becauMj the formula Is plainly printed on ercry
Wmloihowlne-thatlt is atmoly Iron end Qui-
dido m e, tasiciota lorm. no uurc. up i-ay, we.
Prohibited.
lie Darling, a single kiss from
thoso lips would intoxicate me.
She Hut this is a prohibition town.
Her Silence Explained.
This is the way ho wrote to her:
"Molly I have not hud a lino from
for three weeks. J lave you thrown nie
over?"
And this is tho way she answered
him:
"Jlion Hain't you liearn tell that
I am on a slek bed, whero I am slowly
a-dyin', an' can't write a lino to save
my life, you fool you?
Cold Comfort
Nervous Passenger Captain, what
would bo the result if this boat should
strike an ice berg.
Captain It would probably shiver
its timbers.
Ungrateful.
"They say the Missouri razor bug
is nn ungrateful scamp."
"How so?"
"He cuts his best friends."
Kick Ifeuilnchn Quickly Corxd.
Indirection, bail stomach, cunalliatloii, tick
heailarhe. Thal'a the program. Neilpronram
Caaearels Canity Cathartic, liiitani relief.
DrugglH', 10c, '.Xc, 60c.
tilt Father Alio Drives.
First Hoy Your folks ain't ns rich
as ours. My father and mother go
driving ovcry day.
Second Boy My father drives every
day, too.
First Hoy I don't believe it. What
does he drive?
Second Hoy Nails.
Too Anxious,
"I see they aro embalming pet dogs
now," ho said.
"Oh, isn't that lovoy," she ex
claimed. "That's what I'll have
dono to Fldo."i
"Just tlio thine." ho roturncd, sud
denly growing enthusiastic, himself.
'"Givo him to mo and I'll havo it
dono today."
OLD
tUm. 111a 1it mm wtlH nlrl nrre. With
air ir ,i il II
A TItlCKY EIEPIIANT.
30LIVAR AN EXPENSIVE ATTRAC
TION TO CARRY ABOUT.
lie Wna Alrrnjra Up to Home Antic, fre
quently A in in I n it mill Almost Certain
to lie KxiienalVr, llurlnu Ilia Trainer'
Absence.
A big elephant In a tantrum la ono of
the most objectionable feiitiirea eon
; neeteil with the management of n clr
etis, ueeoiilliig to n veteran bandmaster
whoso varied experience with shown
gives' li I tn authority to speak upon tho
, subject Intelligently.
"Tho worst elephant connected with
any crctis on the road," said the band
master, "was Hollvnr, which Is now In
the I'hlladelphlu Zoo. lie was alwaya
looking foi trouble. Not vicious trou
ble, hut Just mischief, ami usually ex
pensive mischief at that. lie was afraid
st only one being on earth and that wna
Johnson, his trainer. Kvery little while
when llollviir seemed to be sleepy nnd
careless Johnson would slip out for a
look around the town. Just ns often as
not that was the very thing that Moll-
var hoped ho would do. The big brute
would pull up the stake that he was
chained to and go wandering off across
' tho tent, taking along with him every
thing that his tackle caught In. The
only thing that anybody could do when
he wna In ono of those playful moods
was to yell 'Johnson. Here he Is, John
sou.' Hollvnr would take a quick look
around and sneak back to the place
where he had la-en chained nnd look In
nocent. "One day when we were In Westerly,
It. I., Johnson, who had some friends In
town, went out for an hour or so to see
them. He was hardly out of the
grounds lx'fore Hollvnr pulled up his
stake nnd struck for the highway. He
went up through the vlllago until he
enmo to the mlnlster'a cottage. The big
brute wnlked carefully In at the gate
and picked his way down Into the vege
table garden, In about three minutes
he had rooted up the iieas and the 'tuck
et corn and was making the pumpkin
vines Into wreaths for his brow. There
wasn't anything worth pulling up left
In the garden, so he moneyed over to
the kitchen, which was built onto the
side of rlio house. He put up the win
dow and stuck his trunk Inside to ex
plore. The first thing he reached was
the flour barrel and lie was a white ele
phant In about three minutes. There
were about 500 circus x.-opIe and towns
people out In front of the house watch
ing him and he Just stepped to the
front gate long enough to blow n cloud
of flour all over everybody within forty
feet. Then he went back and got his
snout Into the flour barrel again Just as
the minister hrnrd the racket In the
kitchen and came In to see what was
doing.
"What met him was n snow white
elephant with his head half through
the window, who let out a cloud of flour
at him. The parson fainted and Holl
vnr gave him three or four more trunk
fills of flour and then marched out into
the front yard and began pulling up
shrubbery nnd dusting himself oil with
It. The ennvnsman who were there
yelled 'Johnson until they were hoiir.-e
but Hollvnr paid no attention to them.
Nobody knew where Johnson was, but
of a sudden a plan came to me nnd I
called tlio baud together. There was It
tune that we called the 'Hollvnr March.'
It was kind of slow nnd ponderous nnd
It wns thu only thing we ever played
"while Hollvar was In the arena. We
lined up Just Innlde the gate of the yarn
and blew up the 'Hollvar March.' As
wo did so, Hollvar pricked up IiIb ears
and I could see his mind wns working.
He knew that tuno had never been
played before when Johnson wns not
around. Johnson being his boss, he
supposed naturally enough that John
eon bossed the whole show, Including
tho band. Tho baud, be reasoned,
wouldn't be out there playing Its tricks
If Johnson was not nround somewhere,
too. So he camo out nnd fell right In
behind tho band and marched bnek to
tlio tents at meek ns Mary's, lamb nnd
wo sat up there and plnyed to the crit
ter for two hours until Johnson came
back.
"Tho minister took $20 damages, ?5
for his garden sass and $15 for his feel
ings. Hollvnr cost so much In damages
Hint Mr. Forcpnugh gave him to tho
Philadelphia Zoo."
Llttlo Joker in a Lost Creek Epitaph
Here lies the clay ot Mitchell Coots,
Whoso feet yet occupy his. boots;
His soul has gone we know not where
It landed, neither do wo care.
He slipped tho'Jokcr up his sleero
With vile Intention to deceive,
And when detected tried to Jerk
His gun, but didn't got his work
In with sufficient swiftness, which
Explains the presence here ot Mitch.
At Gabriel's trump, If he should wake,
Ho'll mighty likely try to take
The trump with that same Joker ho
Had sleeved so surreptitiously.
And which we placed upon his bier
When wo concealed the body here.
Denver Tost.
Neirro Superstitions.
"Many of the negro superstitions nro
quite Interesting. An old philosopher
told mo with grent gravity: 'If you
wnnt peppers to grow you must git
mad. My old 'orann an' me had a spat
and I went right out and planted my
peppahs nn' they come right upl Still
another saying Is that peppers, to pros
per, must bo planted by it red headed
or by a high-tempered person. Tho
negro nlso nays that ouo never sees a
Jaybird on Frldny, for the bird visits
his satnnlc majesty to 'pack kindling'
on that day," American Folklore.
A man wants everything ho can get
nnd a woman wanta everything she
can't get.
What fs
OwarttSs?
A dull, throbbing pain, accompanied
by a scnoo of tenderness and heat low
down In the side, with an occasional
shooting psln, Indicates Inflammation,
On examination it will bo found that
the region of pain shows some swell
ing. This Is tho flrst stage of oraritls,
inflammation of tho ovary. If the roof
of your house leaks, my slater, you hare
It fixed at once ; why not pay the same
respect to your own body 1
You need not, you ought not to let
yourself go, when one of your own sex;
Mas. Asss. Astov.
bolda out tho helping hand to yon, and j
will ndriso you without money and I
without price. Mrs. I'inkham's labora- 1
tory is at Lynn, Mass. Write a letter
there telling all your symptoms and !
ctJt the benefit of tho greatest experi
ence In treating female ills.
"I was suffering to such an extent ,
from ovarian trouble that my physi
cian thought an operation would be)
necessary.
r.ydla E. Pinkham'a Vegetable Com
pound hating been recommended to
me, I decided to try It. After using
several bottles I found that I wax
circd. My entire system was toned J
up. ana l sufrorcl no more witn my
oraries." Mas. Ansa Asrox.Troy. Mo.
A Chilly Petition.
"Deacon Sniff seems to havo a very
cold temperament. "
"Yes; ho prayed for rain once and
it hailed."
Xbe Itest Prescription rnr Malaria
Chills and Fever Is a bottle of Grove's Tasteless
Chill Tonic. It Is simply iron and quinine In
a tasteless I
lorm. Ko cure. No 1'ajr. 1'rtce COe.
Shitted the Responsibility.
Deacon Kldcrbcrry My dear Mrs.
Crab'tree, if only half tho money spent
in millinery were devoted to the
church!
Mrs. Crabtree Oh, my! But thu
milliners won't reduce their prices.
Iloltl'a echniil.
At Venln Park, San Mateo Conntjr. Cat., with
Us leaiitllnl, aiirroiindlngs, perfect climate,
earrlnl tijrvtalnn, thorough lnslrurilon,
complete laboratories, and gymnasium, easily
tralntaiiit ll position In the front ranks of
iciicols lor bora on the Tactile Coast. Ira G.
Iioltt, I'n. V., Principal.
They Mils No Chance
"A woman was arrested in Sew
York for sleeping on tho grass." I
"I didn't suppose the New York j
police farmed out tho grass privileges, '
too."
A Rebuke.
"You don't expect to be famous?"
tnid tho pugilist.
"I had entertained ambitiions in
that direction," said tho young au
thor, t
"But you don't do anything but
write."
"It is my writing that I depend
on." ,
"Xonscnsol Tho idea of n man ex
pecting to get famous by sitting down
and wiggling iiis lingers over a piece
of paper all day! It's absurd!"
II ' "ADAMANT
l WmWi LAMB PLASTER
.O fUfJ&S. fli CBf Asents wanted In ererjr town.
Jo tj8f & ! - -
ffi5 GEtSLER PATENTS
MtM ! COMPANY.
s
For Infants and Children.
BlQStiet I The Kind You Have
lli?teJii Always Bought
MegelablePrcparalionforAs- a
slmilating ihcFoodandRcguIa- J . M
ting Uie Stomachs aMBaweis of m Jjggj'g tflG ff X
tTiWsimtSi I g'
Promotes Digcslion.Cliccrfur- m a Ar
ncssandlfcst.Contalnsneilhcr Ifj nr fft J
Onium.Morpliinc norJlineral. 'M v)l LT
Not 'Narcotic. m fflLulr
jiKytaroujorSUtviLmaaii in
fe&a, ) I l ill
Apcrfecl Kcmedy forConsUpa- III U if
Hon, Sour Stomach, Diarrhoea um I kj
U'orms .Convulsions .Feverish- vm mF
ness nnd Loss of Sleep. m J
Facsimile Signature of 9
NEW VDRK. I
I EXACT COPr Or WRAPPER. M J
FARM MACHINERY AND SUPPLIES.
Be.t noMlble lo ImlM. Jleit material, lint nro-I
portion, Heat niilnh, Malumi runnlns. hevenir I
jeam' esrierlence. Ml ICMKI.U f.'H ! ,
htavkii C' lutanrtTHri'" :.. Portland. or. I
Chamber of Commerce,.
PORTLAND, OREGON.
, I
aignt unseen.
Bertha Fred Hart is going to
marry Bessie Light.
Kdith You don't mean it! For
mercy's sake, what could ho have
seen in her?
Bertha That's what I say. Do
you know, I suspect he must have !
courted her over tho telephone.
French Banks Cieculate Gold
Tho Hank of Franco compels cus
tomers checking out money to accept
at least one-fifth in gold coin.
Uff MM
Xf yea haven't a regular, healthy movement of tha
bowela every day. yon're alck. or will be. Keep your
bowels open. aD4 be well. Force. In tbe shape of
violent pbyale or plU poison, la OaDgeroos. The
Mnootbest. easiest, most perfect way ox keeping the
ocwsls clear ana clean la totok
Pleasant. Palatable. Potent. Taste Good. Do Hood.
Rever8lcken.Weaken.orUrlpe.10e. We Write,
ror free aample. and bookleton health. Addresa i
aurile -.7 (M"7, CSIt lutnil, Irm Trt. s-J I
KEEP YOUR BLOOD GLEAN
SCHOOLS AND COLLEGES.
BISHOP SCOTT ACADEMY.
Portland. Oregon,
Tblrtr.iei-ond year. A boarding and day
school. Military and Manual Training. Opens
Btpt. 12, lnul, witn a faculty of 12 competent
teachers, who employ modern methods and
understand boye. Illustrated catalogue.
ARTHUR O. NEWIUL, Principal.
San Francisco Business College
iau nances nr., Mn rrHitciaco, Sviti.
FULL COURSE, $60.00.
Write for Catalogue.
V. r. M. D.
A. 32-lSOl.
WHEN writing; tfc advertisers pleaae
menUan this paper.
In
Use
For Over
Thirty Years
TORIA
thi eiNvaun oommnv. ncw vans errr.
1ESTF0BTHE
55 canbv
OK Sf CATHARTIC
igaW'iR imi m m w mm in m a n vmm m
ni ITT a net sv
DWsK Ensilage
tlMt and only
perfect hloner cut
ler on ilia market.
Bend for clrriilar.
Mitchell, Uwls A
Hlaver Co,
Portland, Ore.
Where do You
Sell Your Hides? rnr ue.
We always pay the Highest Trice.
f. t nn W- n
IWitlSUUn Ot tlm
. , ,, ,
"6 Front St., cor. Oak, Portland, Or.
The Perfection of Wall Planter, will not fall oir.even
though a leakage occur by the bitratlngof water pipe.
Send lis Ttmr address and recelre circular
showing what others have gained by the use of
Land Plaster.
THE ADAMANT DO.,
Foot of ltth Street. Portland. Oregon.
Secures patents for Inventions
In the f'nlted Htatcsaml foreign
countries. Also negotiates mar
kets and defends patent Inren
Hons, No better terms or facilities
than we offer obtainable any
where. Payment of our fees
may be deferred till patent Is
allowed. Write for pamphlet
JOHN POOLE, Portland, Oregon,
foot of Morrison Street.
Can give yon tbe best bargains in
Rnggies. How. Boilers and Engines,
Windmills and Ptimni and General
Machinery. See ns before buying.
IC Sf,i,I"to,S5,iIf PEIVSIOIN
Ir BICKFORO. Washington. 0. C. ther will re.
1 1 celse quick replies. B. 4lh N. II. Vols. HUB
20th Corps, froaecntlng claims alnco Mi.
S.mmer Resolutions
TAKE
TUE
Sure relief fiom liquor, opium and tobacco
nablti. Band for particulate to
Keelsy InstltDte, 3loZ::'Jt Ki"'
p la best time to onro Catarrh,
noruiicuiiiB aim irfOilsuinpuon
Onr remedy Is guaranteed, II
P. O. Rax 973.
W. H. SMITH 8 CO., Buffalo, H. Yf
Of Course,
"What did the lawyer say when
you explained your case to him?"
'asked Mrs. Baxter.
"He said it was fecs-ible," replied.'
Mr. Baxter.
Piro's Cure enunot be too hlghlr spoken
of aa a conph cure. J. V. O'lirtirs. 322 '
Third Ave., N., Minneapolis, Minn., Jan.
6, 11W0.
Stona tho Cough and
rrornn urr zna uoia.
Laxative Ilromo-Qulnlne Tablets cure a cold la
ono day. Ko cure, No Pay. Price 25 cento.
Hit Choice.
Kind Old Mnn (to tramp) Now,
why don't you learn a trade?"
Tramp Well, I would, sir, if 1
knew of ono better than this.
A Superior Babv.
P.roud Father Jerkins told me to
day that their baby coos so loud that
you can hear it all over tho house.
Proud Mother I hope, Harry, that
you didn't forget to tell him that ouis
cries so loud that it can lie heard all
over the block; if lie doesn't bcliev4
it he can ask the neighbors.
Genuine
Ccuri! r s
Little Liver Pills,
Must Boar Signature of
5ee Fac-Slmlle Wrapper Below.
Tary email and aa easy
to take as ansim
FOR HEADACIIEs
FOR DIZZINESS.
FOR BILIOUSNESS.
FOR TORPID LIVER.
FOR CONSTIPATION.
FOR SALLOW SKIN.
FOR THE COMPLEXION
P . muivimt Muavrwa siqaamat. i
CURE SICK HEADACHE.
Snuffed Out.
Friend What became of your poem
called "Light, Beautiful Light?"
Poet (sadly) Tlio editor turned it
down.
Connecticut sad Clocks.
Tho first clocks manufactured in
this country were by Eli Terry at Ply
mouth, Conn., in 1793. Tho manu
facture soon becamo estensivo, and
Connecticut wooden clocks were fam
ous all over tho country.
fill Rr SI Wit tilt Al I f I Sit flllR.
Best Cousb Sirup. Taste Good. Um
to time. Bold br druggist.
ABSOLUTE
SECURITY.
CARTER'S
Kittle .
WlVER
Mfflaj
3
Jsa
mm