V
9
WM
Charley and Willie were bosom friends
dear friends they knew not why;
Intimate, confidential friends, friends of the
deepest dye.
Mayo and Sue were likewise chums dear
cbnms ro tried and true;
The fondest, lovlngest elmuis, who told each
other all they knew,
With a' happy smile Mare went to the Post,
with a heart so Withe and say,
For the Valeutlne she knew would come
from hr Willie dear thnt day.
And Into her maiden bnsoni quick It went as
she straightway flew
To open the same, and her trusting heart,
to her darling, loving Sue.
When Sue had spanned the skewered hearts,
with Cupid llng'rlng nigh.
She gave a '"sniff,- and quick her nose
turned upward to the sky,
"Why, darling Sue! how can you, dear T Why
do you treat me so?"
Qnoth Sue: "I sent that thing to Willie
Just a year ago."
"The wicked, horrid man!" cried Maye, with
Tengeance In her eye,
But In humiliation deep she soon began to
ThereT'darllng pet! dry up those tears; It
circulates, you see,
For two years since It was that Charley
' sent the same to me.
Done up, and safely stored away, 'twill
serve another day.
When the new love comes, with his vows
and tears, and the old has fled away."
I ary war times. Another son of Monte
' cnl, Jr., John, settled In Virginia. Tho
latter had n son Abraham, who was the
father of Thomas Lincoln, father of
President Lincoln. Numerous Lincoln
still reside in thnt section, and the old
homo In Exeter of the progenitor of the
greatest of American Presidents. Is an
object of (merest to many. Philadelphia
Ledger. ,
WHERE DOUGLAS LOST.
Lincoln' Lnitu-llciiitctltt.-ss Won III its
the I'reslilcncy.
Porhnns no anecdote ever told of. Mr.
Lincoln Illustrates more forcibly his
"long-hendcdness" lu laying plans, not
crcn thnt Incident when lie nsked the nro Ufty llrms lu the city devoting sue
"Jedgc" it question lii Ills debate with clal attention td Inking; dwellings from
air. uougius, wnicn may tie tout ns roi- tliolr foundnt ous nuil earrvli it them
! HOUSE MOVING IN CHIOAGO.
Work Still Done l.y Olit I'nililoned
Method.
Last year 473 houses wero moved Ui
Chicago, says the Chronicle. Thus
there was 1111 average of more tluui one
house moved every day during thu cu
tire twelve mouths, Frame houses,
brick bouses mid even stone structures
nro moved from one place to nuother by
those experts who make u business of
this particular kind of real estate trans
icrs. 'J. nut iiousc-movlug Is still tut
Important feature of the City's Indus
tries Is attested by the fact that there
lows;
One afternoon during that Joint de
bate, says the Independent, Mr. Lincoln
wns sitting with his friends, planning tho
program, when he was observed to go oil
In a kind of reverie, nud for some time
appeared totally oblivious to everything
around him. Then slowly bringing his
right hnnd up, holding It a moment in
the air, and letting It fall with a quick
slap upon his thigh, he said:
"There, I am going to nsk tho 'Jedge'
(he always called him 'the jedge ) a ques
tion to-night, and I don't care the ghost
bodily to some other point. Tho opera
tlou has been reduced to such n science
that during tho Journey of tho house
not a timber or a brick lu tho structure
Is disturbed. The trip Is regarded as
so safe nud so certain to bo frco from
accident thnt often families do not
move out of tho dwellings at nil. but
remain lu them perfectly secure while
tho bouses change locations.
House-moving seems u very simple
process, but there nro lu reality more
Chicago ever since the llro. "You see
a lire, or frame house, limit was estab
lished a long time ago, nud nowadays
there Is hardly event single move with
in those bounds, for you see most of tho
buildings liisldu of It are permanent In
the extreme, the frame houses nro get
ting scarce nud big brick and stone
houses are not moved as often as the
wooden ones. Most of I lie house mov
ing Is now contlned to the outskirts of
the city and people are getting so well
settled that tlnro are comparatively
few occasions for transplanting a
dwelling." f
ATOHISON GLODE SIGHTS.
of a continental which way he answers complications connected with the nroe
It. If he answers It one way It will lose ess than a man who bus never moved a
liliu the senatorshlp. If he answers it in Uouso could conjure up lu tho wildest
the other way It will lose him the pres.- UIght of ,h,8 lunKilmt0I1, tu tIl0 llrst
v-y' . iit i . .i . ,i place, a house cannot be moved except
ISo one nsked him what tho question J .....,.., .... , ., , ,, f
was. but that evening It was the turn b ",0,e wl 110 lI, -
for Mr. Douglas to speak first, and right Ptlng them the privilege to engage
In the midst of his address, all at once, BUC" wore, nerore a man is given
Mr. Lincoln roused up, as if a now such n license he must Ulo n (3.000 bond
thought had suddenly struck him, and with the city housemovlng department,
aid: This bond Is a safegunrd demanded by
jcuge. win you allow me to nsu you tno city to protect the municipality In
one question?" case accident should occur during
Certainly, said Mr. Douglas. 10 movln(. , n UamnB0 gutt guoulu
fcjuiwatra uvifett i ill: If fins it ut'ii iuu
HEft LAST VALEjNTINE
They knew she was dying the faded
little woman In tho faded little bedroom.
She had clung to life as long as she
could, hoping for an answer to that wist
ful prayer la her eyes. But the struggle
was almost over now; the wistful eyes
were growing dim.
"Seel I've got something for ye, Lld
dyl" The little circle of spinster rela
tives and kindly neighbors parted, and
good Uncle Silas Peterson came wheez
ing to the bedside, the snow still clinging
to his rough overcoat. He carried a let
ter in his hand a coarse and dirty en
velope addressed in the crude, sprawling
penmanship of a man whom neither life
nor education had ripened or refined.
"It's from Orson Orson, you know,"
Uncle Silas. added, bending over the
couch and addressing tho dying woman
with the tender directness one uses to
cnllrtrcn and death.
"Orson?" A smile flashed over the
ashen face, and the woman lifted a fee
ble hand for the letter. She kissed it and
tucked it under the thin sbuwl'that some
lovuig hand had wrapped over her shoul
ders. "Shan't I open it for ye, Liddy?" asked
one of the women.
The dying eyes said "So."
"She thinks it's a valentine from her
Husband," whispered one of the neigh
bors. "To-day is Valentine day, you
know. Last year I remember her telling
me how she wished Orson would send her
a valentine just some little thing to
show her that he loved her the way he
did when they were first married."
"Most likely it's a note snyin' he'll stay
over night nnd see the races on the Ice
to-morrow," wns the guarded reply.
The dying woman folded her Bhnwl
tightly around the precious letter, A look
of perfect peace lighted her face. "He
does love me," she whispered, "just as
bemused to!"
Uncle Silas turned away to wipe the
mist from his spectacles. There was a
little fluttering sigh from the bed. "Lid
dy" had goae home.
When they drew the old shawl from
her shoulders, there, tight pressed against
her heart by both thin, blue-veined hands,
was Orson's crumpled, dirty letter. They
were scarcely ablo to take It awav from
her slender, clinging fingers.
"Shall we open it?" asked Miss Penni
man. The women looked furtively at one
another, their curiosity struggling with
their reverence.
"No." said Miss Daggett, at last. "It's
hers sacred. No matter what it says.
She died thlnkin' it wag a valentine. Let's
burn It up, so nobody will ever know."
The ashes of tho unread letter fluttered
white about tho stove for a few min
utes, and then whirled up tho chimney,
as a gust of February wind roared over
tho house. And the little, worn-out,
heart-hungry woman lay smiling, as
death had found her. James Huckham.
or colony just started In some western
territory, and suppose there was precisely
100 householders voters there, and sup
pose, Jedge, that 00 did not want slavery
and one did. What would be done about
itr
Judge Douglas beat about the bush, but
failed to give a direct answer.
"No, no, Jedge, that won't do. Tell us
plainly whnt will be done about it."
Again Douglas tried to evade, but Lin'
coin would not be put off. and he insist
ed that a direct answer should be given.
At last Douglas admitted that the ma
jority would have their way, by some
means or other.
Mr. Lincoln said no more. He had se
cured whut he wanted. Douglas had aw
swered the question as Illinois people
would have answered It, and he got the
senator-ship. But that answer was not
satisfactory to the people of the South.
In 1SC0 the Charleston convention split
in two factions, and It "lost him the pres
idency," and it made Abraham Linncoln
President.
follow to which the city of Chicago
might bo made n party to the defeuse.
The houscmovlng department has sole
power to lay out the route along which
the house must be tnken. Whenever It I
Is possible the movers are compelled to
effect the transfer by way of streets
that nre little used. A fee of $5 for tho
privilege of moving the house must be
paid to the city.
This does not end the mover's trou
bles or those of the owner of the bouse
by any mentis. All of the rules nnd
regulations of the moving department
of the city must bo complied with nnd
an Inspector Is always around to see
that these nre observed. The houso
owner does noPhavo to reckon with the
neighbors from whose midst bo Is go-
Hteel Wool lit tho Arts.
"Although steel wool Iiiih only been
used as a substltutuir mimlpaper dur
ing the last six years, It Is now very
extensively utilized for polishing pur
poses by metal workers, carpenters,
cabinet-makers, house painters, sign
painters and gratners throughout the
UnltetT States," said a wholesale dealer
In tho material to the writer recently.
Steel wool Is an article of regular
manufacture nnd It Is put up lu one-
pound package very much resembling
rolls of cotton batting. It Is composed
of sharp-edged threads of steel, wlllch
curl up like wool or the familiar wood
liber known as excelsior, but It Is much
liner In texture than the latter material,
the tluest quality being not much
coarser than the coarsest of natural
wools.
"The superiority of steel wool over
the ordinary sandpaper consists In Its
great pliability, which enables a work
er to polish or smooth down Irregula
parts of moldings or ornamental wood
work. Such work can be done with
steel wool far better aud much more
expeditiously than with sandpaper. Tho
latter clogs In use.' but steel wool nl
ways retains n more perfect polishing
edge or surface. The wool Is mnde In
various degrees of coarseness, th
coarser grade being Itest adapted for
taking off old paint or varnish nnd for
smoothing and cleaning floors like those
of bowling alleys. The wood Is gener
ally used with gloves to keep the sharp
ends from sticking Into the workman'!
fingers." Washington Star.
An Unfbrtunnto .MiihIi.
An amusing accident occurred on
Front street cable-ear the other even
Ing. It happened Just as the car neared
the turn at Pike street and 1st avenue,
Away up towanl the front end of the
car a lady was sitting. She linil a large
What Lincoln Did fbr a Boy.
During the campaign of 1SC0, while
Abraham Lincoln wns in Springfield, 111.,
a youngster named George Patten was
introduced to him and shook him by the
hand, it was a very small matter to a
man as busy as Lincoln was that sum
mer. Little George was but one of thou
sands who received similar honor, and
with most men the Incident would quick.
ly nave passed from memory. But Lin
coin was not given to forgetting trifles,
Proud of his distinction, George lost no
chance of parading the affair before his
schoolmates, and for a time was looked
upon as a most important personage. But
gradually his prestige faded, and after
the President had taken his scat at the
capital several of George's older compnn
ions openly poobpoohed the story. This
stigma well-nigh broke his boyish heart,
but he was resourceful and resolved to
obtain clear proof of his meeting with
tho great man. So he wrote a letter to
Washington, keeping silent the while,
and In course of a month a reply came
which read:
"Executive Mansion, March 10, 18C1. To
Whom It May Concern: i did see and talk
with ticorge Evans ratten, last May, at
sprlngneld, in. icespectruuy,
"A. LINCOLN.'
Those were trying times for the homely
man who was carrying one of the heavl
est burdens ever laid upon a statesman,
War was In the wind, every minute of his
time was golden nod little George Pat
ten s misfortune wasia matter that could
easily have been sent to waste basket
oblivion. But Abraham Lincoln loved
justice, and somehow hn found the five
minutes necessary to write to the school
boy and set things right in bis troubled
world.
HOME OF ABE'S ANCESTORS.
Old House Stilt Stands In Kxeter Town
ship, Near Reading, Pa.
In the Lincoln exercises in the schools
of Heading, Pa., the fact was promi
nently brought out that the ancestry of
rresiuent Jincotu, before their emigra
tion to Virginia and then Kentucky, lived
In Berks County, and that the ancestral
home still stands In Exeter township,
eight miles below Heading. Here Mor
decai Lincoln, great-great-grandfather of
A Kiddle.
I sent a note to pretty True
And a.'ked her to be mine.
To be my sweetheart fond and true.
Likewise my Valentine.
And then I went to her her say
The wold I loused for, "Yes;"
But llrst a riddle deep and hard
She afcked, and bade me guess
Why that aforesaid note Is like
Policemen? I declare
I'm never good at guessing, and
It really wasn't fair.
Then an Idea dawned on me,
My anger knew no bounds;
I thought her meaning surely was
That It had "gone the rounds."
Dut lest her teasing hurt me.
She whispered, low and sweet.
That dote to her own loving heart
She'd placed It "on a beat."
noMu op
Lincoln's anckstohs.
the - President, settled about 1725, and
built a stono house, which the ravages
of a century and three-quarters have not
destroyed. Ho had a sou named Morde
cal, and tho latter bad a son named Ab
raham, who became prominent In the af
fairs of Berks County during revolution-
A Valentino Diversion.
A "sale of hearts" made a pleasant di
version nt a recent valentine party. The
hearts were cut from water-color paper,
and on each was written one lino from a
couplet appropriate to Saint Valentine,
such as, " 'Tin better to have loved and
lost," "My love is like a red, red rose,"
"Two souls with but a slnglo thought,"
etc. These semi-quotations wcro rend
aloud In turn, each heart being sold to the
person who first succeeded in completing
its couplet. The guesses were made oral
ly, duplicate hearts being given in caso
there were more than one guessing the
correct lino at the sumo Instant. When
all the hearts had thus been auctioned
off, the couple who had won the greatest
number were proclaimed the king and
queen of hearts, and an American Beau
ty, certainly the queen of roses, was pre
sented to each. The two who were least
successful were given small heart-shaped
boxes, filled with tho tiniest of red candy
hearts. Woman's Home Companion.
A Illllvllle Valentine.
I'll say to you
My love Is true,
An' I hain't loved no one sencel
Kcr this here line,
Called "a Valentine,"
Cost a dollar an' forty eentsl
HOUSE MOVING CHEW AT WORK.
Ing to extract bis bouse, but he Is com
pelled by city ordinances to figure pret
ty carefully with (the neighbors among
whom be proposes to plant his building.
If a. majority of the residents In the
block and on the same side of the street
where tho man wnnts to put bis houso
object to tho proceedings then the
whole affair might as well be declared
off, for an Insurmountable barrier has
been encountered. Or if the properly
ownprs for 150 feet in either direction
on the apposite side of the street object
tho efforts of the mover might ns well
be discontinued. The law requires that
the majority of the property owners In
the block on the side of the street to
wlllch the house Is to be moved and tho
majority of those within 150 feet In
either direction on the opposlto side
must first give their consent to tho
placing of the bouse In the new local
ly . .
After all of these matters nave Deen
looked after nnd settled satisfactorily
then the actual active preparations for
the moving of tho houso nre begun.
Houses are still moved by that same
old simple process that has been In use
for decades. The bouse is raised from
Its foundations on jacKscrews, or
"Jacks," as they are called, and after
ward placed upon nroau, ueavy roucrs
of solid wood. A great winuiass is
placed fiheen or twenty rods down the
street and is nncnorca uy ueavy pins
driven Into the ground. A big, thick
rope, strong enough to pull many tons,
Is then pulled from tuo wimimss io
which one end Is fastened. Tho other
end Is fastened to tho house. A horse
is attached to a shaft connected with
tho windlass, and as the animal walks
round nnd round tho center pin the rope
Is wound about tho latter and tho house
Is nulled forward. When the houso has
been pulled up to the windlass then tho
latter Is set forward again and tho
pulling process Is repented, This opera
tion Is performed over nnd over again
until the houso has been drawn to the
now location which It Is to occupy.
"Tho housemovlng business Isn't
What It used to bo In this old town
not by a long shot," said a professional
mover who has been moving houses In
basket, and bundles galore. Ono she
carefully deposited on the sent beside
her. Just as the car neared Pike street
a young man jumped aboard a very
homely young man to others, but to
himself a veritable Beau Bruinmcll
He started to walk the length of the
car to take a scat. He seemed perfect
ly satisfied with himself In every par
ticular. Then the cur rounded tho
curve, and with that Jerk we are all so
familiar with be was precipitated very
suddenly Into a sent next to our friend
with the bundles; lu fact, ho was
thrown against her ns he sat down.
-sure, unu you nnvo mashed mo
cake!" she exclaimed.
"Well," bo replied, with a brilliant at
tempt to bo funny, "I am suro of ouo
mnsli, anyhow 1"
"Yes, Indadel". was tho quick reply;
"and, sir, Judging from tho looks of ycz.
it's tuo urst wan ye iver made!"
The young man left the car nt tho
earliest, opportunity. Scattlo Mall nnd
Herald.
Prominent Women Huffruclsts.
Here is a list of some of the distin
guished men who havo advocated tho
ballot for women: Abraham Lincoln,
Charles Sumner, William 11. Sewnrd.
Chief Justice Chase, Henry W, Long
fellow, John J, Wblttler, Wendell Phil
Hps, John Stuart Mill, Phillips Brooks,
Knlph Waldo Emerson, John Qulncy
Adams, George W. Julian, Joseph Cook,
Jame Freeman Clarke, Charles Kings
ley, Thomas Wentworth Hlgglnsoti,
Itev. David Gregg, Georgo W. Cable,
Georgo William Curtis, Bishop Bow
man, Henry Ward Beechcr. Charles F.
Twlng, Bishop Hurst, Bishop Simpson,
Bishop Gilbert Haven, Georgo F, Hoar,
Itov, Mlnot Savage, Bov. John Pier
pont, William Lloyd Garrison. Theo
dore Parker and James A. Garfield,
Association of Ideas.
"See, mamma, tho lively llttlo lambs!."
"Nonsense, chlldl -Thoso nro nol
lambs they nro llttlo pigs."
"Why, mamma, what did they do?"
Fllegende Blaottcr.
it is oetter to receive a -urn than
a bill for $10.
Comments on Kverydiiy Mutter by nil
Orluimil Ocnlu".
The plain, ordinary man Is u Rood
deal bottii- Hum tho Ideal mini.
Put your nanm In your umbrella, and
nine out of ten pcoplo who llnd II will
return It.
In dealing with tliu mon, tlio women
should lay aside clubs, ami try tears
and honey.
After a man becomes pld, times lltcs
so fast that the monthly muguzlucH be
come dallies.
It Is fortutuilo for most people that
salaries are not regulated by their use
of saw ami seen.
Wo know a mini who owns an um
brella, and never raises It when there
Is ni In or hot sun.
Tho women think they hnve a right
to be consulted lu 'every love affair
within live blocks.
When a woman returns homo from a
trip, and no ouo meets her tit tho train,
It breaks her heart.
No woman truly loves it man unless
she laughs at his Jukes, mid really
thinks they aro funny.
When there Is a rain after a long dry
spell, every church member claims that
his church prayed fur It.
To get Into a story book, a girl must
be either a wlttsouiu llttlu blonde, or a
cold, statuesque brunette.
When u woman remains cheerful lu
getting over a love iitTnlr, It Is a slgu
she (s starting lu on another.
When n guest refuses dessert, the ap
plause of the children at thu table Is
sincere, though It may be silent.
There Is only ono uxcuse for buying
on credit: the hope that the merchant
will forget to charge your purchase.
A woman does not mako as much of
her troubles as she. might unless alio
speaks of the "Iron entering her soul."
The laziest man lu every country
towu rides lo the depot nt least once
a day with the driver of the hotel 'bus.
There seems to bo ns little excuse for
somu people as there Is for weeds aud
bugs; and they nre as hard to get rid of,
It Is the hardest thing In the world
to give an old maid a good time after
she has settled dowu to traveling In
rut.
The day after n girl gets her engage
ment ring, she goes down town with
her mother to look at muslins and cm
broideries.
When It Is necessary to test the sin
cerity of n church member's desire lo
do good, shu Is sent out lo solicit sub
scriptions for n church social.
There are ninny beautiful things In
the world, but none of them compare
with a young dining room girl wear
ing a white drrss and blue sush.
When you give u boy n nickel, tic
usually reaches for It with bis left
SAN
MLTJFJ FALL.
FIIANCISCO ATTOHNKY STHICKKN
WITH PARALYSIS,
hand, and Ills mother says: "Which
hand?" nnd'What do you say?"
If a girl Is seven, nnd her father
calls the plana hers lu a Joke, shu re
members It when she marries twenty
years later, aud steals It from her sis
ters.
A woman, to please a man, should
tell him early nnd lute thnt she Is only
a poor, weak foolish thing, nud ho will
have no trouble In remaining nn Idol It
he confesses uud repents ouco every
day.
It Is fuuny, but In rending, women
fairly gloat over a heroine who meets
the hero, both fall In love without Intro
duction nnd are married, while lu real
life tho average woman will scream It
her daughter speaks to a. man she hai
met every dny In ten years, but to
whom she has not been Introduced.
When you sit on a porch In the oven
Ing, nud rip open your neighbors, nnd
put salt In their wounds, you do nol
hurt your neighbors, but you do give
the Impression that you have a low,
malicious nature. Try speaking well
of people. They enjoy It, nnd klndncst
will do you no barm. You can llnd
something commendable In evcryoni
of your acquaintances.
Will Ho Hurried Away.
A young fellow employed In ono ol
the downtown offices came to work lati
yesterday morning and looked ns If h
bad left Ills boarding house In.u hurry.
He explained It lu this wny;
Ho has the bud habit of'snecrlng nt
tbo mental abilities of women. Yes
terday morning bo remarked, shortly
after arlslug, that women wcro the
only animals extant known to bo de
void of mental power. Tho dispense:
of viands for the establishment, who li
a. -woman, inquired If bo really believed
that.
"With limitations, yes," ho replied.
The human body Is so constructed
that It must have a governing Influ
ence for thu muscles of locomotion la
tho female as well as tbo male, hence
tho prcscuco thero of tho cerebellum.
Tho cerebrum In women Is n great deal
like tho third cyo which tho aborigine!
arc supposed to have had. Having
fallen out of use, It has disappeared."
Ho left the houso hastily and without
breakfast. Cleveland Leader.
HIiimiIi to tlm Hyulfiii llilngs on Nervous
I'riialiiithiii-lhiw """ "
IIIIlM'll'll,
It is doubtful if anything colliding
written moru coiivlnelng than tho In
tertiHtJiig story relalnd by Mr. Kdwnril
T. Dudley, u prnctlulnu nttoriiuy fur U5
vciars In San i'rniiolsci), with iilllcim at
H!l City II ill immuo. Mr. Dudley
lost Ins lialanuo while Handing iipuit
the rear platform ol it ntruut oar, canting
Mm to fall, striking thu ground with
the back of Inn bond, which brought on
a feeling of numhimss and eventually
paralysis. Mr. Dudley tells bis ex
perltince In his own way as follows:
"After the fall from tho oar 1 passod
it by n h an" accident that hud loft no
apparent ill effects; yet u (aw yvonks
later, lu endeavoring to Kt on n car, 1
found 1 could not iiiIko liiy foot, l'roni
this time paralysis begun in, my foot
and In time my lower limbs buuamu
numb. I became pule, as a gliont uud
it brought on u bloodless condition of
my system. From hultig a strong,
healthy man of 18(1 pounds, I was ot
(lu cod to 1 in pounds, nuil my doctor
told my wife that It was only it ques
tion of time when I should havo to
luko my bed. Meillclno proscribed
by tho doctors did no good, and, nt tlm
tlmo I started to tuko Di. Williams'
l'lnk Pills for I'alu People, 11 1 fell
down 1 could not iKisslbly gut P Hgnlu
nnuNjintniieo. I could scarcely walk
u block. Now I can wnlk three
or four tulles without fatigue, nnd as
you sou, am altogether a dllfcruut mull
'-aud all from eight or nlno boxes of
Dr. Williams' l'lnk Pills for 1'itlo Peo
ple. "After trying Dr. Wllllum' l'lnk
I' ills, I could sco In a very short tlmo
that 1 was picking up color nud my
health and general system wns much
improved. I did not change my diet,
nor did I take any other medicine, mid
my inereaso in weight (runt MS
pounds to lHf pounds I can lay to
nothing elo than Dr. Williams' l'lnk
I'llls for Palo People. Signed.
KDWAUD T. DUDLEY.
Subscribed uud sworn to before tno
this 10th day of July, 1000.
Justin Outim, Notary Public
At nil druggists or direct from Dr.
Willliuiis .Meillclno Co,, Hclioneotady,
N. Y., on receipt of price, 60 cents per
box; U boxes $L'.C0.
REALISTIC SONGS.
QiieerQneiitlon I'.vnked by llcnrjr Hue
sell'. Uallud HIiiuIiik.
Henry Ilussell, tho well-known Eng
lish vocalist, relates In his- autobiog
raphy that on one occasion he gave, at
Hanlcy, England, nn entertainment for
thu benellt of the Staffordshire potlcra,
who were In great distress. After, bo
had sung his song, "There's n good tlmo
coming, boys; wait a llttlo longer," a
man lu the crowd arose; greatly ex
cited, and shouted: ."Muster Itussell.
can ye tlx the tolme'r Another nrtisnn
lu the reserved sihitH stood up and said:
Shut onp, man; Muster Itussell 'II
write to yel"
At NewcaHtle-upon-Tyno Mr. Ilussell
snug "Tlm Gambler's Wife." lu which
the wife Is represented as nwalllng the
gnmbler'H return to his home. Tbo
clock strikes 1 It strikes il-lt strikes
H. As It strikes -1 the young wife, clasp.
Ing her child to her bosom, dies lu hope
less dcspnlr, At tills point n woman
stood up and shrieked In shrill tones:
"Oh, Mr. Itussell, If It bad been me,
wouldn't I hnve fetched lilm homo!"
In earlier days, as the same vocalist
was .flinging, "Woodman, Spare That
Treo!" an old gentleman cried: "Mr.
Itussell, wns the tree spared'" i
"It wns, sir." '
"Tlmiik God or thntl" exclaimed tho
old gentlemnn with a sigh of relief.
When "The Newfoundland Dog" hnd
been suug-a piece wlllch describes tbo
dog saving a child's life n North coun
tryman exclaimed: "Wns tho child
saved, mon?"
"It was, sir."
Then, with tho nnxlobs look of ono
asking a great favor, the man pleaded:
oouiu yc ten me where to get a don-
llko that?" Philadelphia Saturday
Evening Post,
Quick-witted.
It was a cold, dump morning In De
cember, and as Jones took his morulug
paper from tho hands of an equally
cold and damp newsboy he said, "Are
you not afraid you will catch cold on
such a wet monilng, my son?" Quick
as a (lash the llttlo lad replied, "Selling
newspapers keeps up tho circulation,
Blr." That boy ought to grow up to be
humorist.
Naino l'or Voting Machines.
A namo for voting machines has been
Invented. They nro now called voto-meters.
There Is no end to tbo rings a woman
wear.
Thoro Wns a Mistake.
"1 think," ho begun, as ho halted n pe
destrian; "I think I Wnltf h mlstako
with' tho cabman who drove tno to tho
Corcornn Art Gnllery. I am quite sure
gavo him a ?10 bill, but ho must lmv
mistaken It for a ?2 bill.''
"And you bopo to llnd him
nsked tho man of tho stranger to tho
city.
"Why, yes, I have hopes."
"Well, you nro about as green as the-v
make 'cm. That cabnmu deliberately
awiimiuu you oui ot njaiiy dollars."
"I can't hardly believe It. He looked
so honest and truthful tmt I I "
"That you ought to havo asked lilm to
hold your watch and the rest of your
money! My dear old Josh from tho
cornfields, let mo say "
At that minute a cnb ra(t!cd up, and
the driver dismounted and said:
"See hero, old man, there Is a mis
take. You probably meant to glvo mo a
?2 bill, and I thought It wub ouq when
I gave you n dollar lu change,"
"But I think It was a ?10, my friend."
"No, It wob ?20, mid I hnvo been driv
ing about for half nn hour to llnd you
and restoro tho mpney. Here It Is."
"And what wns It you were going to
sny to your dear old Josh from the corn
fields?" asked -tbo old man, as ho turn
ed to the wise person,
But tho wlso person wns there no
longer. Hrf was flying for a cor ns If
running for bis llfo.-Washlngton Post