W Tf ? rr nn iMtr allot CM
GP
S3
IS
laOOD-LOOKINQ MEN WANTED
cffSUEP 0J THE CARS.
p
1
e e 0 w e
CrpIIAT Is provoklngl"
II The exclamation escaped my
lips tn spite of the fact that I was
traveling alone.
Yet not alone. Tor In the seat with
tne sat n pretty young traveling com
piuilou, oue whom 1 hail not seen be
fore and who must have come In ami
occupied the place while I had dozed
off.
Yes, I had heen tlve minutes asleep.
and in that brief interval there had hap
pened something which caused me to
exclaim la the way I did.
When I lay back my head In the fast
whirling train, to think a moment, I
held In my hand a photograph. It was
In a cahluet envelope, and, strange to
say, I had not yet looked nt It.
I leaned forward In the seat and tried
to search the aisle past my traveling
companion, then I looked under the
seat, then back of It.
"It must have fallen out of the win
not get Into conversation with hor, for
she kept putting tne off and engaged In
a running lire of words with some stu
pid young cousins of hero. I could not
QnniUninr, Vluoroim Persons Desired
for 1'iiMitloiiN nf I in i r l ii itcc.
"Wo hear n lot of talk of pretty
ivomen getting nil the best positions ait?
dorks, stenographers, and ho on," re
narked thu tindeislxod llttlu nmn to his
(hum. "It never scorns to occur to
leoplo that good-looking men get all
he best Jobs In men's work. Hut they
lo. A tall, portly, well-dressed man
ilt make his way with half the hialiu
f an iuslgulllcant-looklug, carelessly
lressed fellow. In nlnety-nlno cases
lut of n hundred u successf ill pjlltlclau,
jrofosslonul limn, or business man I
,!T,Z. ... handsome, or b.g'nnd 'tine looking.' as
iviii aiv it itit iuu(iiivi iliiil till'
derstnml girls. What Is the matter with
hor? What have I done? Send mo
back her photograph. I tlnd I am really
lu love with her. Yours,
"CHAULEY."
The next day there came this letter by
messenger:
"Go with me to-night to call on her.
I sent her some flowers this morning
early. Half an hour later I saw the
children carrying them to school those
stupid little cousins, probably, to give
Jioy say.
"A few days ago a friend of mine lost
i Job that pays $10,000 a year simply
)eeauso ho Is homely and weighs only
ISO pounds. A inauufactuier wanted u
lupcrlutcndcnt In one of his mills. lie
vrote to an editor, an old friend, lu
Chicago, and asked lilm to recommend
loinebody. Tho editor wrote back:
.lames Gregory Ib tho very man for
roil. IIo has had experience, ho In'
lever, and I can recommend hint
HEROES OF W 0 WARS ,? XrZl
sent lo lilm liu bogitu ono of 1 ,
famous marches In lilsturv A .
RODEnTS AND KITOHENER, WHO
HEAD ENGLISH FOHOE8.
Ono Keniicd ItittlyliiK Viinio In tho
Colclinttiil March t Kiiniliihiir, tlio
Other Won Glory on tlio llluoily
HiiiiiU of the HiiiiiImii.
The seriousness of tho war sltundon
in .South Africa has stirred up Kuglnml
as she has not been stirred up before
In three-quarters of n century and has
led to her ordering to the scene of lios
tlUtles two of her ablest generals,
Klold Marshal Iord Itoberls, ami MaJ.
(Ion. Lord Kitchener, tho one the hero
of Knnilahar. lu Asia, mid the other
tho hero of Oimltirmiin, lu Africa.
Lord ltoberts, who will assume chief
command lu South Africa, Is the Idol
of tho Ilrltlsh army, and Is popularly
known as "Hobs." Ho Is regarded by
tho military authorities of the lending
countries of Europe as tho foremost
llllllllin iini.tnvn ... iiinini'y OVfp i
cilng ii) n tut tit I ii ni hitch mill ...
hostile territory, straight front if.."
tmrch j
to ICiiiiiliilnir
days. At lit"
.'100 ItlllCH
i'"d of tho
to the teacher. You must go with me 'n)ux veuty years' acquaintance.' The
iianuracturer telegraphed immediately
lor Gregory to come nud take tho place.
Sregory reported for duty nt a ninnu-
That evening, unwillingly, but to picturing town S00 miles away. Ho
to-uight. Maybe you can tell what Is
tho. trouble. Yours desperately.
"CHAULEY.'
dow," I said to myself.
At this the young lady murmured:
"Have you lost anything?"
"les," said I, "and, to make the mat
tor more embarrassing, It was tho pic
ture of a y.ouug and beautiful girl, the
finest of her sex."
"You pique my curiosity," said my
companion.
"Well, mine was piqued also," said I,
"but, owing to my stupid fashion of
falling asleep in a railroad train, I am
afraid it will never be gratified unless
I am fortunate enough to see the orlg-
iginai some day."
"How Interesting." said the pretty
gin beside me.
Seeing that she was In a mood to al
low me, a chance traveling companion,
to converse with her. I said: "It Is too
utterly provoking!" Here I hesitated
"Tell me about It," said she.
"Well," said I. "as you prohably live
In the East, and as I live In the far
West, and as there is no probability of
our ever seeing the people or even of
Knowing, as rar as you are concerned,
who they are, I will tell you about It. 1
think I can do so without Impropriety,"
laughed I, "specially an It Is a love af-
lair, and all the world loves a lover."
At this the pretty glr! looked Intensely
eager, and I prepared myself to tell the
story or tne lost photograph."
"I can best begin," saia I, "by rend
Ing you a letter."
. Taking from my pocket a letter in a
man s writing, I read aloud this para
graph: "She Is a beauty, Ned, and no mis
take. I am wild for you to come East
and meet her. She Is a Southern girl,
but comes North now and then to see
her grandmother or mints, or something
of that sort. Make3 her headquarters
at Boston.
"But that is not the best part of It,
Ned. I could love her for her pretty
face and for her good qualities. But.
trutn to tell, I am loving her Just a little Sicily, Sardinia
msu ior ner money. Think of it! A
cool million, nil In her own name! Came
into it last January. She Is very gen
erousiy Inclined. Talks a great deal
about charity and all that. But I think
her charitable Impulses could be
curbed. At least, I shall try It.
"My chances are excellent. Her folks,
oblige my friend, I called for him, and
together we went to make a social call
at the homo of his former friend, the
young lady who had suddenly frowned
upon bis suit.
The house, a very lenutlful one, was
gayly lighted, and from the Inside came
sounds of music.
"Looks as though they were having a
party," said my friend. "They did not
invito me."
"Never mind; we will go anyway."
A butler admitted us, and we were
shown Into the parlor.
There was a ripple of feminine laugh-
tor, a rustle of silk skirts, and the next
minute I found myself bowing low to
the prettiest girl I ever saw.
let her face was strangely familiar.
and so was her voice, when she held
out her hand and said sweetly: "I be
lieve we have met before."
"Why, why, so we have." I easned.
forgetting my mnnners.
For tlte young woman was mv trav
eling companion of the week before.
I think," said she, later In the even
ing, when we found a minute to chat
alone, "that I have some property be
longing to you, I picked up tho photo
graph as It fell off your lap. It had
come out of the envelope, and seeing
mat it was a picture of myself. I kent
It."
"You must have been Interested In
the letter I read you on the cars."
"I was."
I will not try to picture the sumr-lse
ui my inenu unariey, nor will I tell
now i won tne girl,
ivoro his best clothes and was through
! well groomed But Gregory Is small
i ml pale and looks like n school boy.
" 'I am James Gregory,' he wild whun
lo nrrlved at the manufacturer's olllcc.
" 'Oh, are you? Well, nh! tho fact Is.
ill! the fact Is. Mr. Gregory. I didn't
?xpect ' And the manufacturer
hook Ills head lu despair.
" 'Expect what?'
" 'Well. I thought you'd bo u big. line
looking fellow. The fact Is, you won't
lo nt all. Gregory. I'm sorry, but you
won't do at nil. Why, the men won't
so bossed by a man who doesn't weigh
aiore than two sticks of Hour!'
"That ended It. Gregory lost tho Job,
uid ho was an expert, too, as rar iu
tnowledge of the work In hand wns
:oucerned." Chicago Inter Ocean.
riKt.II MA 1IH1! AT. 110IIKIITS.
Ilrltlsh commander of the Victorian
era, his celebrated forced march to
HOW HE GOT HIS CLOCK.
Siivcd a Muii'ii Life Who Wim Dyliifc
if (Jul nny.
In tho hallway or n Philadelphia
loctor's house stands a lino example or
grandfather's clock, tho possession of
which the medical ninir owes entirely
:o a pinch or snuff, says the Philadel
phia Itecord. Some yours ago the doc
tor lu question set Ills heart upon such
i timepiece, nud devoted two of hl
mentions to clock-huntliig. He visited
oiauy New England fnrnihouses with
out success, as old rurulture lias been
pretty well gathered up by the dealers
down east," and then carried his
juest Into Delaware and Maryland.
where ho found many old clocks, but
But I will mention that the proudest aonu of them for sale.
ornament of my library table Is n enh.
Inet photo from which the sweet face or
my wife looks at me.
and the cart.
It has hnpponed recently thnt m.
Albanian whoso relative had been
killed Jiy a Turkish vizier shot the
strictest of Boatnnlnn.. ilk. m i. L "- "' " m least a partial
not Indifferent; writes to me regularly : ?"Z T f V'0 vMta
Accepts the trifles I send herf Ami A,ab'a, th Ttem '8 ln f"'1
seems to think there may be somebody !V Wh,ch " 80 wo
worth having up here in the .North, i V m, off-fllut to start
even if she is a Southern girl. I tt of nre nirely committed.
"Well, Ned, I deserve her. I can , a consI,I,iIble degree of order Is
make n woman happy, thouch I nm i lh?rcb' ' Preserved.
afraid that I should never have fallen 1 AS 11 18 Kcnel'a"' understood the ven
so desperately In love with her if ahe (letUl orI8luatl;(1 ln the following prac
had been poor. j t,cu: An assasslu wns never allowed
"Good-by. Glad you are coming East ' to escaPe- TUo responsibility of punish
fioon. I Inclose the picture of my beau- i ,nout wns nssuniel by the nearest blood
tlful heiress. Send it back to me. I reIatlons of his victim. There must bo
want you to see how she looks. Yours. t)l0011- a ucuth for a death. Now York
Vendetta of tlio Present.
It Is through lack of Information Him
the vendetta is referred to to day as an
institution of the past. Vendettas
blood feuds exist to-day not only ln
Sicily, Sardinia and Corsica, but In
Kentucky and other of the southern
and western states, and a.'so nt rim. -
hi England, Irelaud nud Trance, Italy throat that was choking him to death.
Stliiitilnntfl were udmlnlstered and thu
lick man recovered.
Tho Philadelphia doctor left the place
tho morning after this remarkable
operation, but ho had not been home n
IIo was about to return homo dls
:onsolnte when ho wns called Into con
lultatlouovcrapntlcutdylng of quinsy.
The resources of medicine had been ex
hausted, when the Quaker city doctor
bethought himself of nn old snuffbox
be had picked up during his wander
ings, ln which still lingered n modicum
of snuff, pungent ns of yore. With this
powerful tobacco tho doctor assailed
Iho nostrils of tlio sick man, who, sneez
ing violently, broke the nbsccss In his
week before the grateful Marylander
lent him a grandfather's clock, tie
lompnnled by n enrd, upon which was
written: "This clock, which struck tho
hour of my birth, would have tilso
marked the hour of my death If your
iklll and knowledge had not stayed tho
Hand of the destroyer."
''CHAULEY"
"Now. isn't that provoking?" said I.
"I read the letter, took out the photo,
laid back my head and fell asleep. Now,
when I wake up, I find It gone."
"That Is really too bad," said the
ycung lady. "I can see how badly It
places you. What will your friend
what' wan his name Charley, say?"
"Guess he won't worry himself to
death," laughed I, easily; "ho can ask
the young lady for another. Lucky doir.
Charley always was."
"Almost too lucky," murmured tho
young lady sweetly; "one would hard-
ly expect so much."
"Well, Charley deserves It; he de
serves an no will get."
"Yes, all he will get," said the young
laciy; "no seems so frank and all that
sort or thing."
After this the conversation branched
out on general topics, and before loni.'
the young lady began to gather up her
traveling nag. "I get off at Brookline."
"Allow me."
And with nil graco I assisted her off
the train, sorry to lose .so interesting a
traveling companion.
A few days later I received this lettet
from Charley:
"Dear Ned: The heiress Is stone cold
on me. I went to call on her tho first
night of her arrival north, and found
her pleasant, but that was all. I could
World.
Objects to KootbnJI Hnlr.
Phlneas T. Lounsbury, ex-governor
of Connecticut and president of tlio
Merchants' Exchange National bank In
New York, is a Yankee of the old school.
Some time ago an advertisement was
inserted in New York papers that tho
bank wanted a clerk. Several ap
plicants presented themselves and were
ushered into the private oUlce. where
sat the doughty president in charac
teristic attitude, his feet perched on
the desk and a big perfecto between his
wlskered lips. Tho cashier had decided
on his man, when Mr. Lounsbury stop
ped him with n gesture. IIo whispered
a few words to him and tho clerk was
not hired. Later It developed that thu
reason for the president's action was
his antipathy to tho applicant's hair,
which wns of tho football variety and
parieu in tuo middle. After this dlc
covery it wns noticed that the colffuro
of several of tho bank dandles under
went a change and the Harlem barbers
did an Immense business.
When a man walks down tho street
with a woman wearing a rnlnv day
skirt he looks ns ashamed us if ho had
been caught stealing something.
Some men never cet done helm? mmi
about Christmas.
Kiuiy Dictioiinrlits.
The first dictionary recorded In liter
ary history Is the standard Chlueso dic
tionary, compiled by Pa-out-sho, who
lived about 1100 B. 0. It contained 40,
000 characters, each of which stood for
a word, mostly hieroglyphic or rudo
representations resembling our signs of
tho Zodiac. This was four centuries
before writing was employed by West
ern people. Antlclldes, a contempor
ary of Alexander the Great, published a
Greek dictionary of tho words In an
cient writings 1530 B. O. Another Chi
neso dictionary wns produced about
ICO B. C, nnd Varro's Latin compila
tion of nn English dictionary wero
made by Bullokar In 1010, and by
Cockcrham in 1023, although a glossary
Of old English words was prepared In
or about 075.
Boont of Lobsters.
Lobsters can smell as well as animals
that live upon tho land. A piece of do
cayed meat suspended ln the water In
tho locality where lobsters a to abun
dant will soon bo surrounded by a
greedy, fighting crowd.
Alcohol in Lemon Extract.
Lemon extract has become a favorite
beverngo with tho Ponclia Indians,
owing to tho quantity of alcohol which
It contains, nnd it is said that thev
have been able to got roaring drunk on
a fifty-cent bottle.
At 2 cents a mllo a trip to tho sun
would cost $1,828,004.40. We under
stand there will bo no cut-rato excur-
etous this season.
Kandahar constituting ono of the lin
os t feats of English arms In modern
times,.
Lord I'rederlck S. ltoberts was born
In 1&I2 and wns educated at the I loyal
Military College nt Sandhurst. lie was
only 10 yenrs old when ho went to In
dia nnd entered the Bengal artillery as
n lieutenant. Here he Inlsired un
known to fame until the Indian muti
ny, when he was attached to the col
umn which was sent to nttnek Delhi,
the forces of the rebellion. Tho posi
tion of the small British force before
the capital or the insurrection was ror
mouths ti perilous one. l-'lghtlug was
or dully occurrence, the mutineers hav
ing nn Inexhaustible supply or ammu
nition, ltoberts came under lire for
the first time In n skirmish, when eight
of his party wero killed and thirty
wounded. Soon nfterwanl. In another
or the engagements near tho walls or
tho city, tho young lieutenant was hit
by n bullet near tho splnu ns ho was
helping tho drivers keep the horses
quiet whllo limbering up the guns. A
leather pouch had somehow slipped
behind his back and prevented the bul
let penetrating deeply.
At the Hcllcf of I.ucknow.
Arter the capture or Delhi ltoberts
Joined tho army or Sir Colin Camn.
bell, which ndvanced to the roller of
Lucknow. When tho relieving army
got close to tho rebel lines outside
Lucknow Sir Colin, wishing to let tho
British commander, Outrain, know of
his progress, wanted n Hag raised on
tho mess house. Within plain view of
the mutineers, Lieut ltoberts climbed
to the top or tho building, and, amid
n rain or shot, raised the ling on tho
turret nearest to the foe. It was shot
away, and ho replaced it. Again It
wns shot away, nnd he raised It again.
But It wns not ror tills deed thnt Bob-
erts won his Victorian Cross. That
wns done nt Kliodagunge, .Inn. 2, 1838.
He saw In the distance two sepoys go
ing away with n standard. Piittlnir
spurs to ids horse ho overtook them.
They turned nnd presented their inns
kets nt him, nnd one or the men pulled
tho trigger. It snapped, missing lire,
nnd tho sepoy was cut down by Bob
erts' sword. The other mutineer rudo
away, and tho young lieutenant
brought tho standard back to camn.
Tlio same day lie rescued a wounded
comrndo under nlniost slmllur circum
stances. In tho yenrs that followed tho muti
ny ltoberts saw ulmost continual serv
Ice. Ho was nt IJmebyln, In tlio fron
tier campaign, ln 1803; In 1807 he had
chargo or tho embarkation or tho forco
for tho Abyssinian campaign. In 1871
and 1872 ho was tho senior staff ofii.
cer In tho Luslml campaign, nnd from
1875 to 1878 ho wns quartermaster
general. All his promotions wero "for
merit"
It wns toward the end of 1878 thnt
tho great opportunity of Gen. ltoberts'
career enmo to lilm. Tho Ameer of
Afghanistan rebelled against tho au
thority of Great Britain, and ltoberts
was sent nt tho head of tho nrmy to
subduo him. Ho carried tho enemy's
stronghold nt Pelwnr Kotal with a
splendid rush nt odds of almost 10 to
1. Tho next year tho nows of Sir
Louis Cavagnnrl's murder In Knbul
lint-rlflnrl nil T.'. ..In ...1 . .. .
' ""s'ii mm notions was
called upon to lend nnother nvenglng
force. With 0,000 men ho cut his way
straight through tlio hostile
In thirty dnys placed the British tlag
crushed Ayooh Khnii, mm u,u
einplro rung wllh (ho prnin(.N 0,7
mail who n few months befom !
been almost unknown, M
Sliico then ltoberts lum nAnni
through hiktossIvo sliigeN i0 tl(S
tilfl.lll lt fMllltlllllllt,i. ! ..I.I... . 14.
forces lu Ireland. Now in hU
seventh year ho In culled uji,,,, lo , m
Hi.. Iiiir.lnut ti.ulr . I.I. '!
t.i.r .....,'n. ,,",. ... inn fill 1 1 tltf w ,,l
.u. ' "
irliiiM.i.r. ii,...., .f i.. li ... . .
' " ""'Willi,
Lord Kitchener, elder or Mnrr
Lord ltoberts, Is KiikIiiiiiI'n intent i;
iimm iiiiuiiir iviir iiern. IllH MCC((J
ml conquest of (ho Egypiian n,i,.i..l
It'llll fMtf llllll (I 11.111, k III I...... .
" ' ' " '-''Klllllll (0 .
compared wllh (lint of Admiral (vr.
in tins country, in return ror tfci
services (leu. Kitchener iciidemt W
country lu Kgypl ho was r.iUed t0 n,
peerage nud whm voted u gift or tyju
IUUI In- liu. Ilmtyii nf , '
Ho was born In Kerry County Im
laud In IK.1I, nud nt the age f tMlilt.
received his coiiiiiiInnIoii iih llctttemij:
or engineers. For it long tltim ,0 w
lu tho civil servlco In Kgypi, but lij
18.SU entered (he regular nervlc It!
Egypt under Sir ICvelyn Wood, ,r(,
wns then engaged In the rinrcntiln
lion or the Egypt la n army. 0 fbl
eel veil an appointment on the lntHftl
geuco staff when the troubles In ti.!
Soudan liimle necessary the illKtiatrtj
of trustworthy English olllcer
uoiigoin in iidvaiico or urd Wobt
ley's Nile expedition fifteen years ag
Thero Kitchener wiim always tin.
selected for any work tint t deinninlfj
great force of character. i-oinhlntJ
with (net mid resourcefulness In iletl
lug with Intrigues of dlsloyul olllcUli
or winning over the ciders who warn
cd between fear or Egyptian powti
and u hankering nfter (he good tlilngi
promised liy .Miiudlsiu.
With the Nile expedition Kltehenefi
promotion wns rapid. IIo became ou
of the two majors of cnvnlry lu ItvSti
was made lieutenant colonel in iym
ami became colonel In ISHS. Ik. wtil
lu command or u brigade or the Kgr'!
Ian unity in the ojmtkiIhiih near Kim
klm lu Decomlter. I.HSS, nud was prw
cut In tho engagements ut Gemalul
mid at Tohltl. lu ISSO.
At tho beginning of the campaign J
1MMJ ror the rccoiiquest or the South
MAJ. OK.V. KITCIIK.VKII.
Kitchener wns uiiulo commiiiiilerTn"
elder or the rorcos lu Egypt. IIo led a
successrul expedition uti tho Nllo
against tho Khalim, surely conducting
his troops up cataracts mid throiiKh
marauding tribes mid burning deserts
until Omdiirinan wns reached. IIer
was fought a terrific battle, between
tho Anglo-Egyptian troops nud tho
dervishes, the hitter being cut down
llko grass before tho scythe. In ono
charge tho dervishes lost -1,000 men
nnd when the battle was over 10,000 of
their dead and dying strew the ground.
Tho Khalifa mid ids chiefs wero fugi
tives nnd hnvo recently been killed.
Kitchener, on returning homo after
this brilliant expedition, beciimo tlio
popular Idol. 1I0 Is tho youngest ma.
Jor general lu tho British nrmy.
Not n General' Kit v.
Tho freshness Of cuts Is enrefnll
graded In tills country, but our distinc
tions nro surpassed ln delicacy by thoso
iuk Hineo in vogtio nmoug tho British
residents of India.
Soon after Arthur Wellesloy, nfter
ward tho Duko of Wellington, was ap-
i-uiiueu a mnjor-gencral for his great
services In India, ho hapicncd to stop
In Calcutta. At breakfast tho hero was
served with boiled eggs. He took one,
broko tho shell, and dropped It with an
nlr or disgust
"Laurel!," he cried to his vnlet "wliatl
do you mean by giving mo a bad egg?" ('
Tho valet hurried to his innstor, nnd V
exiimlned tho egg with tho utmost seri-
ousnoss.
"I entreat your rorglvoncss," said ho,
"bUt It's all ft inlsfnt-,, MMir. I.l
.....-. .iiu oiuiiu m:i -
vnnt litis gone nnd given you nu nld-do-camp's
egg by mistake."
Art.
above tho citadel or Kabul, after rout-
in uio Arguan army, which outnum-
"Spreader pawned his overcoat to gel
luuviia iu iimm a picture."
"Did ho sell tho nlcturo?"
"Yes; what ho got ror It Just enabled!
mm io got ins overcoat back." Iudlaul
apons journal.
ii
12