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About The Daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1876-1883 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 8, 1882)
d" ) C-atgB-.yS. ". - w j Ji Vol. xviii. Astoria, Oregon, Sunday Morning, October 8, 1882. No, 7. mmlfl !A0t0timi A ONLT SONS AND DAUGHTERS. sIf 1 had an only son." began the old man as the lights were turned up and Biblical disputes suddenly ceased "if I had an) only son, and he growed up as only sons am pretty sartin to do, an' ho went off on a Sunday skule picnic an1 got drowned, I should feel a little sorry and a heap thankful. If I had an only darter", an' she growd up as only darters alius grow, an' she run away wid a lightnin'-rod man an' was left m the poo house, 1 should be a leetle sorry, but not a. bit sur prised. Do family wid an only son or only darter needs no odder trouble. When you meet a man who carries his cigars in his hind pocket an' goes off behind de barn to take a chew of terbacker, sot him down fur an only son. "When you meet a man who flusters an' brags an1 seeks to lord it ober od der people, you hev foun' an only son. "When you meet a man who thinks de world wa- made fur him alon you hab met an only son. De only son am de man who takes up two seats in de kyars who crowds de chill'en at a festival who cats himself sick when he pays two slullins fur all he kin eat. I (loan' say dat he am to blame, but T do say dat de world feels relieved when he goes to his grave. Once in a lifetime you may h'ar of an only son who hasn't turned de family out ob doahs nor had all de nayburs fur a mile aroun' shoot at him an' effer to buy him a tombstone, but be keerful how you believe it. "When you meet a woman who puts you in mind of selfishness out fur an airin', sot her down as an only darter. When you fin' a woman who expects de kyar to iston in de middle of a block when you meet a woman whose husban' am allurs ready to dodge, sot her down fur an only darter. 5De onlv darter nxows ud to whine -Jgan' complain an' tyranize an' make de world mo' wretched fur people wretched 'nuff befo'. De odder day T was called upon to go ober to a nayburs an' box de years ob an only darter whose noo' ole rnudder lay upon a bed of sick ness, an' I mus' say dat I kinder enjoyed ir. Dat same evenin' I was called up to visit anoder nay- -; bur whose only son wanted to sell de family cook stove to buy a i yaller dog an' a single;barrel shot gun. I had a short struggle wid de young man, an' he won't be "out of bed fur a week to come. ''My sperience is dat a family which do Lawd has forsaken arter sendin' one chile has woe an' sor row in de household. Selfishness takes root dar an' grows amazin' fast. Wickedness creeps in dar an' never lets "go kin be stamped De small-pox out de veller fever mus' give way to de frost de cholera only settles dewn heah an' dar' but de only chile am alius wid us. nc or she meets us ebery day, walks wid us frew life brings upon us de larger sheer of our miseries. Pity de fadder wid an only son thrice pity the rnudder wid an only darter. "Wid dese few configgershums, frown in a speerit of astonishment an' intensity mentto accomplish no desirability in partickler,wejwill now close de winders, put a leetle mo1 wood in de stove an' purseed to asphyxiate de transcendent order ob deinviduous programme." Detroit Free Press. Douglas county is "putting on airs" because she has turned out one TJ. S. senator and nominee for vice-president, and two represen tatives in congress, two U. S. iudges, two TJ. S. district attor neys, one governor, a collector of customs, a ponce judge anu a state printer. Gabriel's Horn. Lorenzo Dow was on his way to preach in South Carolina, as the story goes, and on reaching a large spruce tree he overtook a colored lad, who was blowing a tin horn, and could send forth a blast with rise and swell and cadence which waked the echoes of the distant hills. Galling ande the blower, Dow said to him, "What's your name, sir?" "Mv name's Gabriel, sir," said the brother in ebony. "Well, CJabiicl, have you ever been to Church Hill?'' "Yes.massa, Vsa been dar many a time." Do you remember a big spruce pine tree on the hill?" "Oh, yes, massa, I knows dat tree." "Did you know that Lorenxo Dow had an appoint ment to preacn under that tree to morrow?" "Oh, yes, massa. every body knows dat." "Well, Ga briel, I'm Lorenzo Dow, and if you'll take your horn and go to morrow morning and climb up into that tree and hide yourself among the blanches before the people be gin to gather, and wait till I call your name, and then blow such a blast with your horn as I heard you blow a minute ago, I'll give a dollar. Will you do it, Gabrie?" Gabriel, like Zaeheus, was hid away in the tree-top in due time. An immense concourse of persons of all sizes and colors assembled at the appointed hour, and Dow preached on the judgment of the last day. By his power of descrip tion he wrought the multitude up to the opening of the scenes of the resurrection, and grand a.ssize at the call of the trumpet peals which are to awake the sleeping nations. "Then," satd-he, "suppose, my dy- 1112 inenus, suppose tnat ttus should be the very hour? Suppose now, that you should hear at this moment the sound of Gabriel's trumpet?" Sure enough, at this moment, the trumpet of Gabriel sounded, the women shrieked and many fainted; the men sprang up and stood aghast, sonic ran, others fell and cried for mercy, and all felt for the time that the judgment was set and the books were opened. Dow stood and watched the drift ing storm till the fright abated, and someone discovered the colored angel who had caused the alarm quietly perched on a limb of the old spruce, and wanted to get hi m down to whip him. Then he re sumed his theme, saying: "I for bid all persons present fromdottph ing that boy up there. If a col ored boy with a tin horn can fright en you almost out of your wits, what will you do when you hear the trumpet thunder of the arch angel? How will you be able to stand in the grSat day of wrath of God?" And this is the origin of the oft-times heard .expression, "When Gabriel blows his horn." Here we have a knife. It looks like a saw, but it is a knife. It be- longs to an editor, and is used for sharpening pencils, killing roaches, opening champagne bottles and cutting the hearts out of bad men who come into the office to whale the reporters. There is blood on the blade of the knife, but the editor will calmly lick it off, and then the blade will be as clean and bright as ever. The knife cost seventy cents, and was imported from Lon don, Connecticut. If you are good. perhaps the editor will give it to vou to cut off the cat's tail. Un identified. Great joy entered the household of Mrs. Harrigan, 1 72 E. One Hun dred and thirty-second street, New York, when her little boj', who had been pronounced hopelessly incu rable from severe inflammatory rheumatism by the doctors, was entirely cured by a single bottle of St. .Jacobs Oil, kindly brought by a friend interested in the case. What We Owe to Prehistoric Man. The greatest inventive genius which the world has ever seen was the man who taught his fellows how to produce fire at will. One can easily believe that the art was stolen from heaven, or imparted b direct communication of an angel. Any ignoramus might learn to' warm himself by a volcano, or to boil his meat in a hot spring; but. ihe places at which he could do thisi are very rare. So any one might deiivc a temporary advantage! from a burning tree that had been ' struck by lightning. But how should he learn to kindle a fire whenever he wanted it? When one has a fire and an iron kettle it is easv enoii2h to boil a dinner; but when he has n fire and no In-, cifer matches and no kettle, what can he do in a cold climate? And vet Palaeolithic man had means for making fires and for boiling his food. We know he had fire, for w find charcoal in the caverns; and we find the round stones with which to heat water. He could not have done as our grandfathers did, use Hint ami steel, for it was before the days of iron. Hence, doubtless, wc may infer that he re sorted to the process in vogue among savage nations at the pres ent time a process requiring more patience and skill than is now re quired to run a locomotive. He had learned to rub two sticks to gether, or to whirl 'one stick pivot ed upon another till the ftiction produced fire. We do not reflect sufficiently on the value of the gifts e have received from the people who wore in a compara tively barbarous condition. As we have seen, nearly all the animals were domesticated in prehistoric times. The use of the most valu able metals was discovered before the dawn of historv. The knowl edge of the most useful grains is the heritage of prehistoric times, together with the knowledge of poisons which we must avoid on peril of death. The noblest views of God were reveaiod to the world through a comparatively rude peo pie. The patriarchs never trav eled by rail, nor wore n pair of boots, nor appeared in a dress coat, nor enjoyed the luxury of kerosene and uas. Prof. O. F. TMtjht. Use of Oyster Shells. Until recently oyster shells have been used only for making lime. A few years ago somebody dis covered that the shells made a capital foundation for oyster beds, and within a year or two many thousands of bushels have been used for this purpose. The oyster man selects a good spot for a bed and simply dumps the shells over board. This is done in Julv and ugust during the spawning season, lhesnawn attaches itself to the shell, and in two years the shell is covered with oysteis.rang- ing from the size of a silver quarter to that of a half dollar. Then the ovstcrs are biir enoujrh to seed and are planted as such. Sometimes thirty or forty such oysters are found attached to a single shell. The shells are worth three cents per bushel when thrown overboard, and at the end of two years the' are woith from fifty to seventy-five cents a bushel, making a very goou margin for profit. This method of raising seed oysters is being rapidly extended, and a number of steamers have recently been built at New Haven, Conn., with special apparatus for trans planting the shells. Washington Oicsr. Loss of hair and grayiieas, which of ten mar the prettiest faco, aro pre vented by Parker's Hair Balsam. ! i WES ftuHrknY FOB IIEMATISM J Neuralgia, Sciatica, Lumbaqo, Backachej Soreness of the Chest, Gout, Quinsy, Sore Throat, Swell- ings and Sprains, Burns and. Scalds, General Bodily Pains, Tooth, Ear and Headache, Frosted Feet and Ears, and all other Pains and Aches. Ho Preparation on earth equals Sr. Jaccsj Oil m a taft, sure, simple aid cheap Extenul Jtemedj. A trial entail but ths conpjratireljr trifling outlay of 60 Ceats, and Tery oca suffer ing with pain caa baro cheap and pc itire prcof of it claims. Directions in Eleven Languages. 80LD BY ALLDBU0GI8T8 AHD DEALERS IN MEDICIEE. A. VOGELER & CO., Baltimore, 3ZJ., V. 8. A. There is a kind of dwarf kanga roo in the Staked Plains of north ern Texas. Its body is about eight inches long; its fore legs aie not more than an inch and a half or two inches in length, while its hind legs are all of six inches. It has a tail about eight inches long, completely bare except a tuft of long hair at the end and a ridge of short hairs on its upper part. It is also a marsupial, the pouch being 'well developed. It is of a soft blue color. Its only mode of locomotion is by jumping, precisely like the "kangaroo. It can jump eiizht or ten feet. A LETTER F?U3 GERMANY. .-t JK.N,.Ianu:H ft. 1SS2. Verj eMceJiioil.-h-N: The praNe your Liver Pills linwM-nllcd forth here Is wonderful.. Allei i.tkinirone and a half boxes of your uenr.'m.' I it:. V. McLANE'S IAVKK PILL, J hne en tirely recovered from my rourc.irt,:iiri4 in:j. All who know me wonder how I, who, for so ninny years Iwd no npjetiic, and could not sleep for iKickarhe. tltrh in my side, and general Moniacli mm. plaints could have recovered. An old lady In our city, who li.i-M.i.rml for many years from kidney Ui&tii-v. -mil the doctors had given her m. iw!: two of your PUR and got more relief than -he has from all Ihe doctors. Yosn tru . j. von ri:i: r.n:;. BEWARE OF IMITATIONS, The genuine are never SHgar-eoaloil. Every box 1ms a red wax seal on the hl, with the impressien: McLane's l.ii-r Pill. The genuine MetANK'S MVKK PILUS bear the signature of C Mi'tano anu Fleming Bros, on the wrapper-. Insist upon having the genuine lK. f. McLAXE'S IAVER FIIXS, prepnit-t b Fleming Bro., of Pittsburgh. .i.. Uh market being full of Imitations o! tl: game McLnne, bpellcu differently, but of same pronunciation. If your storekeeper does not lme the genuine DR. C. JMcXAN'Jrs CELE BRATED OVER PU.LS, send us -'.". cents, and we will send you a box by i.inli, and a tct of our advertising cards. FLEXIXK BROS., Pitfeimrgh. Pa. lffiS Tim iriie anKilotn to tho effects of miasma is llostettcr'3 Stomach Dittcw. ThU moii cino i3 one of tho most popular remedies of an a;to of successful proprietary specifics, and is in immonso uomand wberevcr on this Continent fever and suo cxitt3. A wineelasaful three time3 a day is the beet possible p:cparativo for encountering a ma larious atmosphere, regulating the liver, and inrisorating the stomach. For fale by all Drugirists and Dealers generally. I " CELEBRATED ROSCOE'S FIRST CLASS Oyster Saloon, (miena.mus street. astoria. The. undersigned is pleased to announce to the public that he ha op ened a FIRST CLASS lE-nting; HCouse , Anil furnihesin ftrt-class stjle oysters, nor coitee tea, etc. AT TIIK Ladies and Gent's Oyster Saloon, phknamus street. Pie :ie jm e me a call. ROSCOKIOIXON, Proprietor A. M. JOHNSON & Co., Slu'p CliaiOte ai Grocers. Ropes and Corda;; of all ItimK. Rlocli. l':i ( ami 3Ioi inline of all .izc.. The riiiiii! T.f'Mii.t KiMifoli Salmon not Twines. rUerinnitl TiriJirs: Camas, all Ao i ij'P Tipprrt Oars. The 1mM H-soiluient of G ROCERIES In Town. Tin Hcsl COFF.i:i:S ami TKAS. Try otirltlcli'ONc linking Powder Positively Ihe host ever nude. CAIlED GOODS of all kinds put up hyhcat Packers. liirhnnl'tttifs and RobIun' Canned QoimK TVrnss Cah. Profits Small. o?-e;ivi: rs a call-k 13. B. FRANKLIN, UNDERTAKER, Comer Cnatnml Squeraoqlie streets, ASTOP.IA. - - OREGON PFAI.KU is WALL PAPER AND WINDOW SHADES AND UNDERTAKERS GOODS. ST. HELEN'S HALL, AltT DKPAKT.HKXT. fill IE COUPS 01 TKACIIEKS LONG EN X gaged in St. Helen's Hall has just been rehitorced ny the addition of siv ev teach ers. h;e or Jliem trotn prominent educational It .stitullons of lf Iistom States. Two of these are cng:igi'd In tho Musical Depart ment, three in the EnglMi and one (MISS 1TM.1CK) In the Art Repartmcnt. JIISS Fl'II.ICK m a lady of English birth, but edue.ited in this country. She v.as gradtiatetl at Vav:ir College, and has since spent much time in the best private Studios in the Easti-rn Slates. She comes with the highest rveonunendntions for her attain ments and skill as ;t teacher of Painting and Drawim;. The.se ener the whole ground of instruction in the Iiest Art Schools, embrac ing Oil Painting In lindscane. Flower and Suil-hiV studies; Cm.Miii. Charcoal. "Water Colors, Pencil, Pen and Ink, and Decorative Art in all its branches. .MISS FPhLIOK is a lady of liberal edu cation and .superior culture, and the Hector and Priucipal of St. Helen's Hall recommend this department of tliolr school to its patrons with entire confidence, being well assured that it tts.s neer under a more competent instructor, or one of more varied acquire ments. sJ.d.lm Delinquent City Taxes. "XJOTICE IS llElt EIIY (UVEN THAT I, JJl the undersigned. Chief of Police, have becu furnished with a warrant from the city council requiring me to collect the taxes as sessed for the j car 152. and now delinquent upon the list, and make return of the same within sixty days. All parties so indebted will therefore please take notice and govern thenwh es accordingly. (. V. LAUGHERY, Chief of Police. Astoria. Oregon, Stitemlier 10, 1S82. NO FOOLISHNESS ! MUST MAKE ROOM ! I am alMtut to leave for Sau Francisco with the intention of bringing up the finest stock or .1 i:VEF.RY. il'ATCIIES. AND Solid C.old and Silverware, Eer olTercd to the Astoria public, and oiler for sale at ctremelv low prices the w hele of mj iircscnt -tock. This is a bona fide offer. Solid sold Watches. Chains, Bracelets, Ear Rings, pm.-, etc.. at manufacturers prices. GUSTAV HANSEN. . Health is Wealth. Dr. e! C. West's Nerve and Rraln Treat ment : a specific for Hysteria, Dizziness, Convulsions, Nervous Headache, Mental De pression, Loss, of Memory. Spermatorrhoea, Iinpotcncv, Involuntary Emissions, Prema ture Old Age, caused by over-exertion, self abusc, or over-indulgence, which leads to nilscrv, decay and deatlL One box will cure recent cases. Each box contains one months treatment. One dollar a box, or six boxes for me dollars ; sent oy man prepaiu on re ceipt of price. We guarantee six boxes to cure any case. "With each order received by us for six boxes, accompanied with five dol lars, we will send the purchaser our written nutrantce to return the money If the treat ment does not effect a cure. Guarantees Is sueilS only by W. E. Dement, dniggist. As toria, Oregon. Oiders by niftfl at regular prices. w An i ?j wrsf SlB o $2 8W ' 3 vi m mm H? ? S 9 Sg. 59 -s rn M x -"pjip o W r " WILLIAM HOWE, j DEAJ.r.K IX Doors, Windows, Blinds, Transoms! Lumber. All kinds of OAK LUMBER, GLASS, Boat Material, Etc. SS9ffii' a .specialty. :tiMmmimmniimmimmmmiinimnmniminmimnimii : : j Boats of aU Kinds Made to Order. : : j CgOrders from :i distance promptly attended to, uml satisfaction guaranteed ia all cams. MISCELLANEOUS. ASTORIA IRON WORKS. BKXTOXSrUKKT, NKAIt PAKKKR HOUSK, ASTOUIA. - OREGON. GENERAL MACHINISTS AND BOILER iHAKERS. LiNBlHlBINE ENGINES Boiler Work, Steamboat Work, and Cannery Work a specialty. CASTINGS. Or all DcHcriptions made to Order at Short Xetlrc. A. D. AVass, President. J. G. Hu.sti.rs, Secretary. I. IV. Cask, Treasurer. John Fox, Superintendent S. AllNDT & FERCHEN, ASTORIA. - OREGON. The Pioneer Machine Shop -PZzTl - P.L.VCKSMITH -SBm?-i . S H O IaIG3bJBI' V iyx Boiler Shop mr All kinds of ENGINE, CANNERY, AND STEAMBOAT WORE Promptly attended to. A. specialty made of repairing CANNERY DIES, FOOT OF LAFAYETTE STREET. WILLIAM EDGAR, Corner Main and Chonamus Streets, ASTORIA OREGON DSALKS 13 CIGARS AND TOBACCO. The Celebrated JOSEPH RODCERS & SONS GENUINE ENGLISH CUTLERY AND THE GENUINE WOSTENHOLM and other English Cutlery. STATIOKERT! FAIRCHILD'S GOLD PENS Genuine Meershaum Pipes, etc. A line stock of Watclie and .Jewelry. 2Inzzle aud Breech Iieadiac Mbot Guhk aad Killea, Keva)vera. PlHtols. aad AmmRBitlou MARINE GIjAMSKS AIO A FINE Assortment or line SPFCTACLES anil EYE GLASSES. Notice of Sale. NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN THAT THE undersigned has sold his pawnbroker business In Astoria to Dock Wonjr, liehavlnji full consent to earn- on the husiness. d-lwk DOCK CHUNG. -r-i-j jfmtzr .-j VCB'Bk1 iMTtlX Tuzinxiro AND Bracket Work .wj..gi BUSINESS CARDS. V V. HOLDKX, tfOTARY PUBLia AUCTIONEER, COMMISSION ANDk SURANCE AGKN1. TK. J. C. NHAFTFJR, rHY.SIt-Ll. aad 8VSCS9li (DKUTSCIIEC ASZT.) Diaeaftes orthnThratallpe1ty.' Ofllee over Conn's Drug Store. y O. UOZORTM, U. S. CommUsraaer, NsUrrr Faklle, muI iBHaraaee AsuU. j Agent lor the Hamburg-Bremen Fire Ins. O. ui nuuiuur, uermuuy, aau oi wo init elers Life and Accident Iu. Co.. of tUxt ford. Conn. v-Oftlce In Pj thlan Building. Bda U, 12, Q.KI.O F. PAKKEK. SURVEYOR OF Clatsop ConHty,aa City f Astoria Office :-Chenaraus street, Y. M. C. A. kail, Room No. 8. Xl D. WIXTOJf, Attorney and Counsehr at Law. iTS-Ofllce in Pj thian Building. Reoms 11, 12. ASTORIA, - -. - OREGON. 1 TAY TIITTI.R. M. . I PHYSICIAN AND SUBGEOi, ' Ot-KicK-Over the "White House Store. : ikESiuFSCK uvcriiioeraona o;idcrj,uy i posite Barth & Myers' Saloon. 4 i.. ruirox. m. i. rhyHicIaa and. Surge. OFFICE Over A. V. Allen's grocery alar. Rooms, at the Parker House. Tjl P. HICKS, PENTIST, ASTORIA, - - ORKOOII. Rooms in Allen' building up stairs, corner of Cass and Sqemoeqne streets. T K. LaFOKCE, DENTIST lieutai Kooms arer Case Stored Clicnanius Street, - - AstoriaOregaiu I Q. A. BOWLBY. ATTOKNEAT LAW. Chenamus Street. - ASTORIA. OKSdOfc y T. BVKSEY, ATTORNEY AT ULW. May be found at the Court Howe. G. A. ST1NS0N & CO., BLACKSMITHING, At Cjpt. Coders old stand, corner of C&w ond.Court Streets. Ship and Cannery work, Honeakfrsfof. Wagons made and repaired. Good work guaranteed. Cleaning Repairing. NKAT. CIIHAP AND QUICK. BY UEQKtiE LVKTT. Main Street, opposite K. Lneb's, BOOKS FOR THE PUBLIC SCHOOLS! CARL ADLER. A complete stook ot School SeoLs arts school supplies. Any book used to t pin hH at my store. iic ycuuuis in viai'sopLiouniy ean neovuiuta CABL ADLER,