4A |
SATURDAY EDITION
| SEPTEMBER 29, 2018
Siuslaw News
P.O. Box 10
Florence, OR 97439
NED HICKSON , EDITOR
Opinion
| 541-902-3520 | NHICKSON @ THESIUSLAWNEWS . COM
C
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Publisher, ex t. 318
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Letters to the Editor polich
Ending abuse requires a commitment to each other
appearing tough and “manly” nesses.
among your peers while still
It means never using your
holding on to the part of you
strength — physically or ver-
that is thoughtful and caring
bally — to harm the women
feels contradictory to what
in our lives, whether it be your
we’re taught about being a
wife, girlfriend, co-worker,
man.
mother, daughter or neighbor.
The stereotypical definition
A real man provides pro-
It wasn’t until becoming a
of manhood was in movies,
tection, safety and acceptance;
father that I realized how a
advertising and music: Being a a weak man dishes out pain,
childhood of witnessing verbal man means being in control.
insecurity and denial.
and physical abuse by the men
In charge.
In either case, they are
in my family — specifically,
In command.
reflections of our inner self.
my father and brothers — had
Of life and our relationships. The question is: What kind of
impacted me and left wounds
Seeking true equilibrium
reflection do you want to see
which had never truly healed.
I know this because I occa-
sionally saw reflections of my
father and brothers in myself
Ned Hickson
as I fought to avoid making
the same mistakes with my
own children.
As much as we want to tell
is even more difficult today
when you look in the mirror
ourselves we can choose not
because, unlike 35 years ago,
each day?
to take any baggage with us
the unhealthy stereotypes
Every year, our local Siuslaw
on our journey through life,
that define “manhood” are
Outreach Services (SOS)
there is no getting rid of it
relentlessly perpetuated
assists literally hundreds of
completely — only a conscious through social media and the
victims of domestic abuse,
decision to leave it circling on near-constant presence of ad- including 299 in 2017. In
the carousel.
vertising that sells body wash, addition, SOS provided shelter
Ultimately, it is always
music, movie tickets, clothes
for 1,358 victims of abuse last
somewhere. Circling. Waiting and video games by depicting year, including 13 victims of
to be claimed.
what it looks like, sounds like
sexual assault.
This is especially true for
and feels like to “be a man.”
As wonderful as our com-
young men in their teens and
It is baggage our culture has munity is, it isn’t immune
early 20s, when they are defin- been carrying for generations, to domestic violence against
ing themselves and establish-
repackaged and presented in
women, children and men.
ing their place in what is still a more ways than ever before.
There’s no denying that the
male-dominated culture — all
The fact is, being a real man cultural threads of domestic
while simultaneously trying
does mean being in control.
violence are woven into the
to understand the intricacies
But not of others; it means
fabric of our society.
of communicating with those being in control of your-
Though we have made
they love.
self enough to understand,
strides in some areas by recog-
Even as a teenager some 35
acknowledge and accept your nizing and discussing matters
years ago, I can tell you that
strengths as well as your weak- of physical and verbal abuse,
From the Editor’s Desk
that baggage is still out there
circling on the carousel.
Tomorrow, Florence will
recognize the start of Do-
mestic Violence Awareness
Month with an End Domestic
Violence march presented by
SOS, beginning at 12:45 p.m.
at Veterans Memorial Park on
Bay Street.
Whether you are a survivor
of domestic abuse or want to
show your support for those
who are, I hope you will par-
ticipate — either in the march
itself or by showing your sup-
port along the sidewalks as the
march winds its way through
Old Town.
As a culture, each of us
must make a commitment to
avoid claiming the baggage
that perpetuates violence on
our families and each other;
as a community, we must
make a commitment to each
other to support — and when
necessary speak up for — our
friends, family members and
neighbors who we suspect
may be victims.
Most importantly, to end
the cycle of domestic violence,
we must be willing to carry on
with that commitment well
beyond the last, crisp evening
of October.
Death is nothing to be afraid of no
matter what your belief, we all have to do
it. It’s not death but the dying that is what
I and many others fear — particularly for
those suffering for years with debilitat-
ing conditions and diseases.
I for one do not want artificial mea-
sures keeping me alive past my God-giv-
en expiration date. Too much money is
made by keeping people alive.
Roughly 37 million baby boomers will
turn 65 over the next decade, bringing
the percentage of people aged 65 or older
to 20 percent — or more than 71 million
people by the year 2029. In addition, 42
percent of people who live to the age of
70 will spend time in a nursing home be-
fore they die, half of them for two years
or more.
Today, 1-in-9 people over age 65 suffer
with Alzheimer’s. By 2050, the number
of those with Alzheimer’s is expected to
grow to 13.8 million.
If you include other dementias, neuro-
degenerative diseases, autoimmune dis-
eases and cancers, the number of people
considering an end-of-life decision is
going to grow exponentially.
Therefore, something needs to be
done about expanding our end-of-life
choices and making our end days more
comfortable. A survey done a few years
back of Oregon hospice and palliative
care doctors and workers noted that pa-
tients that had their Death with Digni-
ty Provisions in place had a much more
comfortable quality of life.
Just the knowledge they had that they
would not have to suffer was a great
comfort to them and their families.
In 2019, there will be a couple bills in
front of the Oregon legislature to expand
Oregon's end-of-life choices. Non-profit
organizations like End Choices were cre-
Political/Election Letters:
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manager and editor, reserves the right to reject any let-
ter that doesn’t follow the above criteria.
Emal letters to:
nhickson@thesiuslawnews.com
WHERE TO WRITE
Note: Victims of domestic
abuse can call the SOS hotline
at 541-997-4444; abusers
seeking help can call SOS at
541-997-2816.
LETTERS
End-of-life choice is
about compassion
The Siuslaw News welcomes letters to the editor as
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cretion of the editor.
ated to educate Oregon citizens on the re-
strictions of the current death-with-dig-
nity law, advance directives and the need
to expand them. I encourage everyone
to educate themselves on how they can
help make Oregon more compassionate.
—Bruce Yelle
Florence
More skin in the game
I believe mothers, daughters and
granddaughters of Republicans should
be worried. Apparently, allegations of
groping or attempted rape are mere
badges of manhood — leftovers from
youthful exuberance, unworthy of con-
sidered scrutiny.
And later, if you're considering a run
for President, they are lifestyle orna-
ments, subject to non-disclosure agree-
ments.
—Kathryn and Rand Dawson
Siltcoos Lake
Pres. Donald Trump
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW
Washington, D.C. 20500
Comments: 202-456-1111
Switchboard: 202-456-1414
FAX: 202-456-2461
TTY/TDD Comments:
202-456-6213
www.whitehouse.gov
Oregon Gov. Kate Brown
160 State Capitol
900 Court St.
Salem, Ore. 97301-4047
Governor’s Citizens’ Rep.
Message Line:
503-378-4582
www.oregon.gov/gov
U.S. Sen. Ron Wyden
221 Dirksen Senate Office Bldg
Washington, DC 20510
202-224-5244
541-431-0229
www.wyden.senate.gov
U.S. Sen. Jeff Merkley
313 Hart Senate Office Bldg
Washington, DC 20510
202-224-3753
FAX: 202-228-3997
541-465-6750
www.merkley.senate.gov
U.S. Rep. Peter DeFazio
(4th Dist.)
2134 Rayburn HOB
Washington, DC 20515
202-225-6416
541-269-2609
541-465-6732
www.defazio.house.gov
State Sen. Arnie Roblan
(Dist. 5)
900 Court St. NE - S-417
Salem, OR 97301
503-986-1705
FAX: 503-986-1080
Email: Sen.ArnieRoblan@
oregonlegislature.gov
State Rep. Caddy McKeown
(Dist. 9)
900 Court St. NE
Salem, OR 97301
503-986-1409
Email: rep.caddymckeown
@state.or.us
West Lane County
Commissioner
Jay Bozievich
125 E. Eighth St.
Eugene, OR 97401
541-682-4203
FAX: 541-682-4616
Email: Jay.Bozievich@
co.lane.or.us