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WIT AND HUMOR.
In some parts of the country the farm
ers are beginning to feel their oats.
The tradition of the first Chinaman,
Fohi, reaches us 4,700 years. How is
that Fohi? N. Y. Herald.
It was a German Editor -who said that
in the United States thieves are so scarce
that they have to offer a reward for them.
A little fellow who wore striped
stockings was asked why he made barber
poles of his legs. His pert reply was,
"Well, ain't I a little shaver?"
Old lady (to her niece) Good gra
cious, Matilda ! but it's cold. My teeth
are actually chattering. Loving niece
Well, don't let 'em chatter too touch, or
they may tell where you bought 'em!
A Wisconsin man has parted from his
wife because she wouldn't hold still and
let him shoot an apple off her head.
Wives should do everything to make it
pleasant for the f amily . Det. Free Press.
A correspondent says he was pained
to hear a young lady say that when the
talented and beautiful actress, Miss M.,
played in Boston, she never wore any
thing else but low neck and short sleeves.
Some rash fellow says that the giving
of the ballot to women would not amount
to much, for none of them would admit
that they were old enough to vote until
they were too old to take any interest in
politics.
An excellent old deacon, who, having
won a fine turkey at a charity rafile, didn't
like to tell his severe Orthodox wife how
he came by it, quietly remarked, as he
handed her the turkey, that the " Shak
ers gave it to him."
Some malicious old bachelor in Vir
ginia says there is a musical society in
the next village to his residence which
is fifty years old, and that " several
young ladies have belonged to it ever
since its organization."
A recent number of the Shanghai Co'
lestial Empire contains the following in
teresting item of intelligence: " It is
said that during the absence of Ting
Jinchang in Formosa the Fan-t'ai will
act as Fu-t'ai at Foochow."
"Oh, Liberty! what crimes are com
mitted in thy name !" wailed a man, as
he sat himself down in the wood-shed,
where his wife had locked him up, and
he heard her slam the front-door as she
went out to do her marketing.
A Michigan girl has gone clear to Ja
pan to marry a Mr. Lilly. She heard
that the Lilies toiled not neither did they
spin, but dressed in their meeting clothes
every day and she thought she would
like to become one. Phil. North Am.
A tramp has confessed that begging is
profitable in New Haven. "Just say
that a Hartford man gave you a dollar
to help you out, and you'll get two dol
lars from the New Haven party. Any
thing to boat Hartford." Hart. Time's.
Since the Rochester lady, under the
benign influence of blue glass, presented
her husband with twins, the same re
markable circumstance has occurred in
every city in the Union. Tho last case
is reported in tho Now York Commer
cial Advertiser.
A gentleman seeing his wife in a very
sullen mood asked her how she did. She
answered him that she was not very sick
nor yet very well. "Nay," quoth he:
" then I may even turn thee out of doors,
for I only promised to cherish thee in
sickness or health."
" Father, did you ever have another
wife besides mother?" "No, my boy;
what possessed you to ask such a ques
tion ?" " Because I saw in the old fam
ily Bible that you married Anna Domi
ni, 183G ; and that isn't mother, for her
name was Sally Smith."
If Eodgers, the sculptor, desires to
make a statue representing "Surprise,"
we would suggest that he enclose anony
mously a $2 bill to a country editor, and
then observe the features of the recipi-.
ent as he opens the letter at the post
office. Turner's Falls Reporter.
Admiral Duncan's address to the offi
cers who came on bord his ship for in
structions, previous to the engagement
with Admiral do Winter, was both lacon
ic and humorous : "Gentlemen, you see
a severe Winter approaching ; I have
only to advise you to keer up a good fire."
" Young man," said a lugubrious in
dividual in a white choker to a profane
youth on a Western train the other day
" Yonng man, do you know that you
are on the road to hell?" "Just my
blasted luck," replied the unregenerate
person ; "I bought a ticket for Chicago!"
"How are you, John?" said one friend
to another, meeting in the street ; "I'm
glal to see you." "Very well, Charley,"
was the response. " Come and take a
drink, old fellow; 'tisn't of ten we meet."
" That's a fact, Charley ,v declared the
other ; " and when we do, it's meet and
drink."
A countryman, upon visiting N. York
during the cholera, asked what that
board was put across the street for.
Upon being told that it was to keep the
disease from spreading, he exclaimed :
" Well, I've often heard tell of the Board
of Health, but I never saw it before in
all my life."
"Why do we live ; what is there for us
in this life ?" inquires The Christian Reg
ister. We don't pretend to answer the
question, but we do know that when a
man has walked four miles through the
mud to see a girl, and finds another fel
low sitting up with her, it comes home.
Norwich Bulletin.
They say that one of the Brattleboro',
Vt., congregations was disturbed the
other Sunday during the momentary
stillness following the opening prayer
by a voice from the adjoining dwelling
exclaiming, "Mary, where's the nails?"
Soon the answer came. "In the coffee
pot, you fool!" Boston Traveller.
" Who can tell what a baby thinks ?"
poetically inquires Dr. Holland, and mil
lions upon millions of people have giv
en up the conundrum. Boston Post.
Irom the hungry calls they make semi
occasionally probably their thoughts
may be interpreted to mean that it is a
longtime between drinks. Washing
ton Star.
One of our exchanges solemnly in
quires: "Watchman, what of the night'"
and -uway down the long vista of street
lamps we hear the echoingreply, "Whaz
of ver nigh? Like t'no howenny mans
gonto fin where t' put nigh' kev when er
doorstuck plum full 'f strav kevholes
Atswhazzer marrer ith night." Bur
lington Hawkeye.
A fashionable paper announces that
in Paris everything in female attire is
worn just now with trayed edges, mak
ing it difficult to distinguish ragged
dresses from whole ones. This has been
done, it is supposed, with benevolent in
tentions toward small incomes, though
it ia diffioult to believe it, even on au
thority. The most appropriate comment
aeems to be " Hem !" Judy.
A Senatorial Joke.
An amusing incident occurred in the
Senate over the appropriation for the
School of Mines. Senator Seay had set
his heart on securing an increase of
$10,000 for that institution, and has
been bending all his energies to the ac
complishment of that end. Realizing
his anxiety about the matter, Senators
Young, Mayor, Parish, Wilson and
others quietly slipped around the cham
ber and made arrangements with all the
Senators to vote "no" on the first vote
taken on Seay's amendment to add $10,
000 to tho appropriation for his pet.
Seay made a really good speech in be
half of his amendment, and sat down to
tremblingly await the result.
"Those in favor of the amendment of
fered by the Senator from Phelps will
say aye," said Senator Phelan, who oc
cupied the chair.
"Aye!" rang out Seay's voice, solitary
and alone.
"Those who are opposed say no,
said the chair. .
"No-o-o!" responded the entire Hen
ate in chorus.
A deadly pallor overspread Seay s face
as he sank back in his chair with a sad
realization that his cherished dream had
fled. , . ..
"The noes appear to have it, said
Phelan.
"Division! division!" came up from
all parts of the chamber.
"Those in favor of the amendment
will rise and stand until they are count
ed," said the chair, and up stood every
Senator except Seay, who had not yet
sufficientcy recovered from his shock to
have strength enough to rise to his feet.
"How does the Senator from Phelps
vote ?" innocently inquired the chair.
"Why why of course I vote aye,
Mr. President," said Seay, in a bewild
ered sort of way, as if he could scarcely
believo the evidences of his own senses
at the sudden turn of affairs.
"The aves have it, and the amend
ment is adopted," announced tho chair.
Never was there a more forcible illus
tration of the darkness of midnight, as
it were, in the twinkling of an eye con
verted into the glorious light afforded
by the splendor of the noonday sun.
than Seay's features exhibited at this
moment. The painful silence of tho
moment before gave way to a smile
which seemed to illuminato the whole
chamber. There was then a big laugh
at the Senator's expense. St. Ioui Re
publican .
Houston and the Ham. Here is a
story about Gen. Sam Houston, in the
days when he was President of Texas,
which may not be as accurate as an affi
davit, but still is probably truer than a
good deal of history. It is, at any rate,
current, and currently accepted in Tex
as. His servant so tho gossiping story
runs went one morning to a grocery
and took a particularly good ham, ob
serving to the small boy in charge that
the President would call and pay for it.
By and by the grocer came in and the
small boy, now an elderly man, finishes
the storj: "Said the grocer, quickly,
'Did you get the money?' 'No, but
Pres'dent Houston is coming round to
pay for it.' 'President Houston the
devil! Did Tom say he would see it
paid ?' 'No, Sir.' 'Then you are a fool.
Now, Sir, you go straight to tho Presi
dent's kitchen and bring me that ham,
unless Tom will say it shall be paid
for.' I started off, very much crestfal
len, and resolutely walked into tho
President's kitchen. I saw my ham ly
ing there, with a few slices cut off it,
and seizing it told Tom that unless he
would undertake to see that the money
was paid I must take it back. Tom cog
itated awhile and then said, 'Young
man, take back your meat. The Giner
al is a mighty good master but a mighty
poor paymaster, and I don't keer to in
volvilate myself with his debts.' I left
with the ham in my hand. Going
around to the gate I had to pass the
front door. There stood General Hous
ton, the President of Texas, placidly
survevinsr the landscape. My little
man,' savs he in his most supurb man
ner, 'tell your master I am under great
obligations for a most delicious break
fast, and would pay him, but I really
haven't got the money. The fact is,
young man, Texas is very poor, and as
her President I must share her pover-
tl- ' H
The Origin of Vaccination. All
honor to the immortal Jenner, says
CasselVs Magazine, who sleeps in his
quiet grave on the green cliffs of Folke
stone. What a glorious morning "for
England, home and beaut v" was that
of the 11th of May, 1796, the birthday
of vaccination! On that day matter was
taken from the hand of Sarah Nelmes,
who had been infected while milking
her master's cows, and this matter was
inserted by two superficial incisions
into the arms of James PhipjJS, a
healthy boy of eight years of age. He
went through the disease in a regular
and satisfactory manner; but the most
agitating part of the trial remained to be
tried. It was needful to ascertain
whether he was free from the contagion
of small-pox. This point, so fnll of
anxiety to Dr. Jenner, was fairly put to
issue on the first of the following
July. Small-pox matter taken immedi
ately and directly from a small-pox pus
tule, was carefully inserted by several
incisions, but no disease followed.
Now, by this one simple and brave ex
periment upon the lad James Phipps,
Dr. Jenner established a law which the
experience of millions upon millions of
human beings in generations since, has
only served to strengthen. It is won
derful, too, to think that there can bo a
single individual in these islands who
cannot see at a glance the simplicity,
beauty and truth of this law. There is
no contagion in the world so certain and
sure as the contagion of small-pox not
even that of hydrophobia or rabies in
the dog. The very emanations or ex
halations from the body of any one sick
of small-pox, if breathed by a healthy
persons, are in many instances suffi
cient to induce the disorder; and yet
there is this healthy young boy, James
Phipps, who receives the small-pox
matter into his very blood, and still he
does not take the disease!
Honesty Not the Best Policy. The
other day a poor man asked a stranger
on Clark street for the love of heaven
to give him a nickle, as he and his elev
en children, all of whom were in arms
were starving for bread. But the
stranger said to him brusquelv "My
good fellow, that's too thin. You want
that nickel to buy whiskv with. Be
honest, now. Don't you ?'' The man
el hVSrhm ?onestr i3 the best pol
icy, replied the stranger. "I would
give you the nickel only you tried to
deceive me at first, and I could not re
spect myself if I condoned the offense."
vfitcago Tribune.
Obeying Orders.
That ancient gentleman, Lord William
Lennox, has been writing about the ce
lebrities whom he has known during his
long life, and in the course of his rem
iniscences tells this story of the Duke
of Wellington: The late Lord Derby,
when having one of his country man
sions decorated, was having the central
floor either painted or tesselated. A
young man was at work on one of the
walls, when the Earl ordered a number
of slippers to be thrown on the door
mat, desiring this young man to order
any one that came in to put on a pair
before crossing the passage, and adding
to the order, ' 'if any one fails to attend
it, you must take him by tho shoulder
and turn him out." Soon after a party
returned from hunting, and the Duke,
with his splashed boots, opened the
door and rushed along the hall. The
young man immediately jumped off the
ladder on which he was painting, and
seizing his Grace by the shoulder, fairly
pushed him out of the house. In the
course of the afternoon Lord Derby
summoned all the household and men
at work into the study, and seating him
self beside the great warrior, demanded
who had the impertinence to push the
Duke out of doors.
The painter, all a tremble, came for
ward and said: "It was I, my Lord."
"And pray," rejoined the Earl, "how
came you to do it?"
"By your orders, my lord."
On this his Grace turned round to
Lord Derby and, smiling, drew a sov
ereign out of his purse, which he gave
to the workman, adding, "You were
right to obey orders."
Gradations of Guilt.
The wisdom of many peoples, and of
all ages, ordains for the punishment of
the same act various degrees of severity,
according to the influence of circum
stances, or the guilt of the offenders.
Thus, homicide may bo only killing by
misadventure, or willful murder, or high
treason, according as the case may be.
It is, therefore, strictly on principle
that the act of converting to one's own
use the money of another exhibits, in
the light of our lofty civilization, va
rious gradations of guilt which, after
the manner of statutes, are signified by
appropriate names, the amount of the
spoliation being in this case the princi
pal criterion. Thus :
Taking $1,000,000 is called a case of
Genius.
Taking $100,000 is called a case of
Shortage.
Taking 50,000 is called a case of Lit
igation. Taking $25,000 is called a case of In
solvencv. Taking $10,000 is called a case cf Ir
regularity. Taking $5,000 is called a case- of De
falcation. Taking $1,000 is called a case of Cor
ruption. Taking $500 is called a case of Embez
zlement. Taking $100 is called a case of Dis
honesty. Taking $50 is called a case ol Thievery.
Taking $25 is called a case of Total
Depravity.
Taking one ham is called a case of
War on Society. jr. Y. Graphic.
A Young; 'Girl's Singular Affliction.
A correspondent of the Reading (Pa.)
Eagle gives a startling account of a very
singular phenomenon witnessed in a
young girl residing three miles over the
hills from Epharta. Drs. Beck and Je
rome reported the facts. She is a daugh
ter of Edward Iloyt, and is in her thir
teenth year. Up to within two weeks
ago she appeared perfectly healthy, but
recently a strange and mysterious affec
tion has seized hold of her. She has
gradually increased in size to an alarm
ing extent. From her feet to her head
her limbs are swollen, and she appears
nearly twice as heavy as she was two
weeks ago, when the fact is, she is much
lighter, lie skin is drawn very tightly
over her flesh, and it more resembles
an inflated bladder than anything else.
The poor child suffers little pain, but
she is deeply mortified at her shocking
appearance. JSono of her clothing tits
her, and she says she feels as light as a
feather. An experiment was made in a
bath-tub filled with warm water, and
she actually floated like a life-preserver.
Her entire body is puffed, and her
cheeks, arms and limbs seem swollen
and ready to burst. When the cuticle
is punctured with a silver needle, air
escapes in puffs, and in this manner the
skin is prevented from bursting. It is
not dropsy, The patient says she feels
light enough to fly; and as the case is a
mystery to the physicians, it is intended
to take her to Philadelphia for examina
tion. In a AVhirlpool. Tho London cor
respondent of the New York Times says:
I have just received the following spe
cial dispatch from Messina: "Captain
Boynton has crossed tho Starits of Mes
sina, passing successfully through both
Scylla and Charybdis during the preva
lence of a severe gale, which caused the
destruction of one of the accompanying
vessels. Fortunately there were no
lives lost. The trip took five hours,
and was witnessed by the American Con
sul and many distinguished Italians.
Shortly after starting, Boynton received
a blow from the tail of one of tho large
fishes which abound in the Straits, but
upon the approach of tho harpoon boat
he was found entirely uninjured, and
laughing at tho mishap. Notwithstand
ing the prediction that he would never
leave the water alive, Captain Boynton
landed in excellent condition and in no
way fatigued by his marvellous exer
tions. His reception by the entire pop
ulation of Messina was most excited and
enthusiastic. He was officially welcom
ed by the Mayor and authorities, and
subsequently entertained at a public
banquet. Captain Boynton compares
tho Scylla and Charvbdis to the rapids
and whirlpools of the Niagara River."
Help Each Other. A father was
walking one day in the fields with his
two children. The wind was blowing
over a hne field of ripe corn, and mak
ing the beautiful golden ears wave like
the waves of the sea.
"Is it not surprising," said one of the
children, "that the wind does not break
the slender stalks of the corn ?"
"My child," said the father, "see how
flexible the stalks are. They bend be
fore the wind and rise again when the
wind has passed over them. See, too,
how they help to support each other.
A single stalk would soon bend to the
ground, but so many growing close to
gether help to keep each other up. If
we keep together when the troubles of
life come upon us like a stormy wind,
we shall keep each other up, when one
trying to stand alone would fall."
ADVERTISEMENTS.
The Wise Course in Blionmatlsra.
Rheumatic patients who have been in
duced to submit to depletion by blood letting, of
to take colchlcuni and other drugs of an equally
pernicious character, will consult their well being
by abandoning sucb insane procedure, and using
as a substitute Hostetter's Stomach Bitters, which
will infallibly afford them the much desired re
lief, and is absolutely safe. This benign vegetable
depurent cools the blood by expelling from it the
inflammatory elements which give rise to maladies
of a rheumatic and gouty type, and rectifies disor
dered conditions of the stomach, nervous system
and bowels which usually accompany them. As
rheumatism has a tendency to attack the heart, the
desirability of an early resort to the Bitters is ob
vious, since the danger is increased by every mo
ment of delay.
,
I'.lcjr ant Jlioto;cr!iil
Will be taken for you at reasonable rates
by calling on Taylor & Co., 415 Montgomery
street, San Francisco. All work guaranteed.
The Little Pains, toothache, head
ache, earache, cramps, colics, corns and bun
ions, are relieved by one application of Trap
per's Indian Oil. Price 50 Cents.
Canckb can be Cubed. Da. Uoni, of Phil
adelphia, announces his discovery for tho radi
cal euro of Cancer. No Knife! i'o Pain!
No Caustic! . lleme.3.ies with full directions
sent anywhere. Pamphlets and particulars sent
free. Address with stamp, Dr. II. T. Bond, 85!)
North Broad st., Philadelphia, Pa.
We Guauantee Dr. Ueislev's Headache
Powdebs to cure the- most distressing cases in
ten minutes. All druggists sell 10 cent trial
packs regular size 50 els., or mailed from Ba
lem, N. J. Also Powder in Bulk for Physicians'
use. Crane & Brigliam, Wholesale Agents, cor
ner Front and Clay streets, San Francisco.
Rheumatism and Gout. When you
feel the pain of these tormenting disorders com
ing on, send to your nearest druggist for a bot
tlo of Durang's Rheumatic Remedy, and com
mence its use. In nino out of ten cases vou
will save a doctor's bill. Remember, it is taken
internally, and cures in a very short time.
Only one dollar a bottle. II. C. Kirk A Co.,
Agents, Sacramento.
4 oil -lis mill 4'oltls.
From .Samuel A. Walker, Esq., the well-known
Real Estate Auctioneer, of Boston.
" Having experienced results of a satisfactory
character from the use of YVistah's Balsam of
Wild Cherry, in cases of severe colds, during
the past two years, Have full faith in its reno
vating power. I was first induced to try this
medicine by tho strong recommendation of a
friend, who was well-nigli gone with consump
tion, and whose relief from the use of it satis
tied me of its great value in cases of colds and
decline, and most clearly demonstrated to my
mind its great value as a restorative, that only
needs a fair trial to insure a grateful recognition
from the public." Sold by all druggisU.
ImiMirtanttoall Iiivalltiw. Iron in I lie
ISlooil.
The Peruvian Syrup, a protected so
lution of the protoxide of iron, strikes at the
root of disease by supplying the blood with its
vital principle, or lifo element Iron. This is
the secret of the wonderful success of this rem
edy in curing Dyspepsia, Liver Complaint,
Dropsy, Chronic Diarrhoea, Boils, Nervus Af
fections, Chills and Fevers, Humors, Loss of
Constitutional Vigor, Diseases of the Kidneys
and Bladder, Female Complaints, and all dis
eases originating in a bad state of the blood, or
accompanied by debility or a low state of the
system. Sold by all druggists.
A Ureal Insurance Company.
Tle Xew England Mutual Life Insur
ance Company, of Boston, is one of the greatest
trust institutions of tho world. Nearly a third
of a century ago it began business, and since
then it lias steadily grown and strengthened and
extended its facilities and reputation for fair
dealing and honest, reliable life insurance, until
now it stands at the head of honored and trust
ed companies for tho insuring of life in the
United States. Its policies are issued under the
non-forfei table law of Massachusetts, and thus
the insured will always get the full value of the
money paid, should lie fail to keep up his pre
miums. Wallace Everson, 313 Montgomery st.,
S. F., is the General Agent for the Pacific slope
and is ever ready to give all information desired
4iirlniii4 I'rosrcsi.
The rapidly increasing business of M.
II. Garland, and the unprecedented demand for his
celebrated Vegetable Cough Drops, has forced him
to remove into new and more spacious quarters.
His new factory and wholesale and retail depot for
his renowned candies is now located at 765 Mission
street, in the Hancock building, San Francisco.
The new fac tory is the largest on this coast. With
his additional facilities. Mr. Garland is enabled to
offer to the trade superior qualities of candies at
low cash prices. He has also supplied a want long
felt in this city, in fitting up his old stand at 823
Market street, in first-class style as a ladies' dining,
oyster and ice-cream saloon, where ladies and gen
tlemen can enjoy the luxuries of home cooking, as
well as all the delicacies of the season, and where
families can obtain pure, fresh Ice cream at prices
which defy competition. In the oyster department
he employs one of the best cooks in the city, and is
enabled to sfrve his customers with choice" Eastern
or California in every style. S. J'ost.
Ir. ! Mitr'a Kpmlnal IilJ. for Seminal
Weakness. Ixms of Vigor, Sexual and General .De
bility. Physical and Mental Prostration, and the
many ailments artsinjrfrom indiscretion, self -abuse,
over-work and over-anjtietv. To those in need of a
Rpeedy and reliable remedy for the above com
plaints. DR. LA MAR'S SKMINAL PILI-S are rec
ommended. Thousands testify to their merits.
Price, (2 50 per bottle. Sent bv express, C O. D., to
any address, secure from observation. A. M cBovle
fe Co., DruRitists, San Krancisco.( P. O. box 1.952). sole
agents, to whom all orders should be addiessed.
70
Qn LAIHES" FIXE OA HON, with name",
OU postpaid, 10c. Columbia Card Co..Valatie,N.Y
tipHEMICAL STKKXOTIT" cures seminal
weakness and all forms of debility resulting
from error or excess $3 per bottle. Sold at all drug
stores. Cra.vk & Bkigham. Agents, San Francisco.
GILHAM S GREEN OINTMENT,
IOR all external diseases of the Horse, lias no
. equal. For sale by Traders, Druggist and Jlar-ness-ninkers.
MAIN fe WINCIIES'I KR,
214 and 2I Battery Street, San Francisco.
r L. 0J WKLL'K l)t:.
J TALHOOMS, 230 Kearny St.,
near Bush. Ethkk or Chloroform
administered. A lady assistant in
attendance. Okaduatks only em
ployed to operate.
Artificial Limbs
Jlanufacturert by MEXZO SPRING, Geary St.
San Francisco. Hcnd for Circular.
S2BO """""d for an Incurable cnr.tr. Dr. J. P.
Fiti.kr. being sworn, says: I graduated in
1833. appointed to Professor's chair 18.r9; have devot
ed 40 years, exclusively to Rheumatism, Neuralgia.
Gout. Kidney aud Liver diseases. I guarantee Dr
Fitler's Rheumatic Remedy, Kidney Cordial, and
Liver Pills, a permanent cure, or will refund monev
Pamphlets, References, and Medical advice sent by
',"".' KT&tlH. Address Dr. Fitler. 45 S. Fourth Phila
delphia. Medicines at Druggists.
1JIVIH13XI) AOTICEH.
Dividend Notice. No. 9.
COLLATERAL LOAN A.NI NAVI.VON
Bank, corner Post and Kearny Streets, San
Francisco. The usual Monthly Dividend for April
is declared, payable May 3th, to stockholders of rec
ord April 27th, 1877.
F. S. CARTER, Secretary.
THE BLACK HILLS,
And American Wonderland, by II. N. Maguire. who has spent
la years in the Hills and Yellowstone region. The latest, full
est, and ooly truthful accounts of Cold and Silver prospects.
Agricultural and Grazinr resources. Climate, Hunting and
Fishing, the Indiana, and Settlers' Adventures and Conflicts
with them, Minine and Wild Western Life, and the frmnd
Natural Wonders of this most remarkable country Waterfalls.
Boiling Geysers, nobis Scenery, immense Gorges, etc
Illustrated with 27 Fine Engravings, and a large new Map.
corrected to March i. Price, only IO cents; by mail, 12 cents.
Sold by all Newsdealers, or entpostpaid. by
DONNELLEY. LOYD & CO.. Pubs.. Chicago, tU
TlA TVGr cfcJ
CO.
Sole agjtvts of
Dr. Hausmann's German Bitters,
The Best Appetizer and Digester in the World. A
sure cure for Dvspepsla. Headache, and all Nervous
Diseases ; purifies the Blood and regulates the sys
tem generally. 4191 Commercial Street.
Between Sansome and Battery. San Francisco. Cal.
I FCBSISdl EVEBTTIIINU
nsed in Apiaries, such as lllveo.
Honey Kxtraetom. Hnl ve.
Veil, etc. ; Pure Italian Queens.
The American Beekeeper' Guide pa
per cover, 60 cts.; cloth bound. "Sets,
and fl.on. Send for Illustrated Pam
phletFree. Also energetic Agents
wanted for the best selling works be
fore the public.
II. W. CAHEROST,
S3 K ehr n y St.. Sao Francisco.
ADVERTISEMENTS.
IMPOKTAXT TO
NEWSPAPER
PUBLISHERS.
RUSSELL, GIBSON & Co.
Are now prepared to offer extraordinary Induce
nieuts to Newspaper Publishers :
OITMDKS, I.VS1DKS, Sl'PlLEJI5:T.S,
Or entire newspapers, printed with or without our
o-onerauve Aavertisements, on more lavorubie
terms man ever ueiore olIY-red.
r ro Advertisements of our own
Inserted amoutr readine matter.
ho that patrons can always know
now uiucu tiiey should be credited
with.
BHS-Our selections of reading matter, together
with our Sun Francisco Letter and Market Report
are acknowledged features, and give entire satis
faction. Be particular and address your communications to
Western Xcivspaper Union
5IH ClAY ST., San Fmnrioro.
KCSSKfX, GIBSON & CO., Pkopkiktors.
By THE IIKST IS THE CHEAPEST.
MARTIN'S
CHALLENGE
AXLE GREASE.
Try It! Try It! Try It
Sold Wholesale by the following Houses:
W A US Ml IlKNUY
llAKKISO.V fc DlC'KSO.V
Co..
WKI.I.MAM, PkOK fc Co..
C'ASTI.K JiKON .
TlI.LMAS- & .TKN-DKI.
Hash Bros..
Khl'BK .t K I.E t,
J M. 1'IKK fc Co..
Hl'NTlNOTO.V, JIdfKIXS
& Co.,
K. K. JIOWK3 & Co.
W. W. 1oiok fc Co.,
I.KUUEN A WtUPI-LK,
M. P. Jon ks ft Co.,
M. 1. Uawlkv ft Co.,
Hakkii A- Hamilton-,
I AM'K1 fc CO .
liOJU.VSO.V, tOWI-KK &
Co..
fir:i. MoMclliv tfc Co.
Jlardu'it Cfinl If nc. Axle !-- - Ih
Kiiarantred ouperior to any Urraiir man
ufacturel on tliia Conitt. Pacific S.tiltri
fating' totunaii.r-Factory, corner Pine
and Kleiner Street, San Franrinro.
EUREKA
nAS RECKIVKO A MOST VLATTKKINtS Di
ploma with the (.rand Medal of Honor, at the
Hreat (Vntennial Kxliiliition, for tho rt known
fctibstitut for Curled Hair. TIip K V It Kit A Is the
only elastic, cleun, healthy and cheap material for
lulling Mattreses, Cushions, and for Cpholstery
Work in Keni-ral. Sf aiiufactured by J. HKHZOU fe
CO., Nan Francisco.
-rv rnnfinm i nrnnsnrr i
feryr. iLLin; mniai
XYVYyp The most wonderful improvement
m Artui'-iui iei'ili lias recentlv neen
madp by lK. JKS.SI I', Ukntist. Corner fSutter
and Montgomery streets. Wan Francisco. The ma
terial is the color of the natural (Jniu and as hard
and hrm as any ivory and much stronger than tho
vulcanized rubber now in use ami can be made and
inserted for the moderute sum of HIS.
IIOLT'.S ZVXSW 3IA1
Of California, and Nevada,
r i uv -i'i i Ktrr, ix tiv-iius am
ft a Sjectioiis, with all the Spanish Orantu, Jtail
Koads, etc. The finest Map of the two .States ever
published. Adopted by the Public Schools of San
Fruncisco. Send for one. W.4KRi:. 1IOLT,
Ml7 Montgomery Street, Sau Francisco.
Strong riizr.liiipvvrBiifreaf coat safely
per uuiu ai your door, batistac-
ion guarantee!, fcplen
did assortment of
6 for f1:
13:'or.?i Send for
H OPi:.-f. KKO. T'TOMAS.
Jufri iiiii oritjioo, V, ett. Chester, Vau
INESS
COLLEGE.
yll llj 320 F
Fost Street,
vj'tsss taw
81 Jf FBAXCISt'O.
OPPOSITE rXIOX SQCAltE, SAN FRANCIS
CO. The oldest and most complete Commercial
'ollee on the const. KleKnu t halls; new furniture;
thorough instruction: practical teachers: high stand
ing with the public. Students can commence at any
tunc-, i nun r veiling sessions, circulars may
be iiad free on application.
HI'ECIALTY
REMOVAL.
TVr 'Al H. 31.
V?iii&V$!! ' haf removed
mSjV'.v-?-! to 'laj klreet. Dis-
easesor the F.yk and Kak
v receive especial attention
Jfr.tlicat onrt Surgical treatt
inent given in all diseases.
Much experience in Throat
and LtuiK diseases. Klectro-
MacnetiNin Jt-;, nlil1.nll, an
plied In diseases of the nervous system. To Uehiu
Urinary diseases much attention" is priven. May be
consulted by letter. Address V. J. PA CO II, M. I)
21 Clay street. San Francisco, (over Clay streeV
Savings Bank;, Rooms 1, 2 and 3.
TO THE
NERVOUS al piLiTATED
ESSENCE OF UFE
CURES NERVOUS AND PHYSICAL DEBIL
lty, and restores exhausted vitality in four
weeks as sure as water quenches thirst. Price S3
per Bottle, or 4 Bottles fin case) 10. sent to auy ad
dress upon receipt of price, or C. O. I)
To be had only at 42t, Kearny St., San Francisco.
Gal., where all letters should be addressed. OtHoe
Hours from a a. m. to 1p.m., aud 6 to 8 p. m
Till: I'ATEXT
r:
AIR-SPACE:1
AN Improved method of covering Boilers. Steam
h anl Hot-Blast Pipes The best uXon-Cvrutuctm
of heat known; will save from 10 toCO per cent over
any other covering, combined with Ntrullte and
Koap Ntone,
Fire-Proof Roofing and Paint.
Orders for Roofing and Felting Boilers and Steam
Eif,eI8r,"omlJtly attended to. Dealers In HAIR
-1 8; ' MEKKELL V CO.
Oflice and Factory 31 1 Townseud St., San Francisco
BUSINESS
COLLEGE,
No. 24 Post Street
San Fnaiuvco, Cat.
:tntIIli-l
1SGX.
2fJli?K DPracLica,i:ducation ln a" Commercial and
English Branches. French, Uerman, Spanish Draw
ng and T elegraphy. For rnformatiou, call at Col-
ImnarU n TIioi
lejfe, or address, for Circulars.
K. P. HEALD, San Francisco.
AMERICAN EXCHANGE HOTEL,
NAN FKAKCINCO.
rciHIS OLD AND POPULAR TIOTEl WHICH
A. has for the last twenty-four years extended to
the traveling public a cordial welcome and comfort
of a home, and so favorably known to old Clifor
nians and the traveling public, that it requires no
comment on my part further than to say that Thos.
Bryan, who Is an old California!!, and knows how to
cater to the wants of the traveling public, has taken
the full proprietorship of the above hotel, and wili
leave nothing undone to make this hotel second to
none in San Francisco for
Comfort. Good Living and Cleanliness.
My sole aim shall be to the comfort and welfare o
my guests. The table is furnished with the best the
market affords; the house has been thoroughly reu
ovated and newly furnished throughout; two bun
dred rooms well ventilated.
(gentlemanly and obligingclerks.and clean and at
tentive waiters will always be found in my Hotel.
The Hotel is the most centrally located of any In
the city, bing in the centre of the business portion
of the city; the Street Cars pass the door every two
minutes to all parts ef the city. The Hotel Coach
with red lights, will be at the railroad depots and
wharfs to convey paosengers to the house free of
charge; my Runners wear Silver Badges on le't
breast with the name of the house on.
OW Beware of other Kuntiert. Hotel Prices
from C il.BO to S2.00 per Day. Give me a cu and
Judge for yourselves TlI'tM. BByaiJ,
fKOPHIKTCR.
Boots and Shoes.
JOIIS sTLinMS, N. E. cor Bat
tery and Jackson Nt., San Francisco
offers to make to order the best Frericr.'
Calf Leather BOOTS at from lfo l" (S
California Leather Boots. . ! . L 15
IVoikiI. ( ' ' ' . . '
6 00
00
3 50
i V -" uiiora iles.
Boys' and Children's Boots and Shoes made to order
Kf -thS S?"f y ordering Boots Tand mSSL,'A
the amount of 12 or iorV wj UtYi ow? SIS" 10
FACTTRE ON-I V o..""".: f MANU-
HAIB
3? 7
t m .n a
if
In
Posltively one price.
Boots aud Shoes sent C. O. D
ADVERTISEMENTS.
JgThe success of the San Francisco Chronicle (Daily
and Weekly) is unparalleled in the history of journalism on this
coast. It has the largest bona fide circulation. Its advertising
patronage is greater than that of any other journal. It is th
most popular paper. It has a potent influence, as shown by
the many reforms of local abuses which its bold, persistent and
able exposures have caused. It is the most brilliant, fearless
enterprising and complete newspaper printed on the Pacific !
Coast. It is the cheapest paper. It is a first-rate family
paper. It is a first-rate story paper. It is a first-rate agricul- I
tural paper. It reports the fashions for the ladies and the
markets for "the men. Its Boys and Girls' Department is a t.
most attractive feature. Independent in everything, neutral
in nothing-. Always the friend and champion of the people.
DAILY CHROUICLE. $6.70.1 WEEKLY, OULYS2.50 ' f
WEEKLY CHRONICLE CLTJS RATES: f
A Club Of 5 at $2 25 j-earearh $11 25 A t lu' or 10 nt $J a jear each j-., u,
yPostage free on Daily and Weekly. All names t a CIu'j i:mst be sent at the 6sme ti.
Send for a Specimen Copy. All Postmasters arc Aeiits I
Send money by postal order, registered letter or by express, to Cuas. 1)k Yoitso fc Co., Snu i'raacTLcu r
MOODY & FARISH,
VKRCHAN'T. 2IO DAVIS T.
Sun Friinciwco. For su!c-Hl ICiisra nl
Twine, Slie- Shram. Mierp-WanlteR. To
barro. Ck1i atdvmicf s made on consiiciiriif-iitt
Maize Flour Toilet Soap!
Maize Flour Toilet Soap!
Maize Flour Toilet Soap!
A erreat discovery a new snap rem pound ! It
noo(!u8. Sfftens, and whitens the t.kin, has wonder
ful l'iilinii and superior washing properiies, ami is
.(i!;:iy Hinted for the hath, nursery, and t'Hieral
to. vs. 1 1 is delightfully perfumed, and Bold every -tt'
i miiiH moderate price. Kegi.ilered in Pateut-OtM-
. 1H7S. bv the iiiHiiufaeturerH.
M( KEO.NE.'VAN UAAUbX & CO., Philadelphia.
'OJtn.innJ.-f uti 'Si.uramof( 'jo.i ''js 8iuoustII
Y4iwis '.I il JJ luSy 'CI KOI.lTYiy K O
o) ;.J! AldB jo 'li jo; jnu.it.)
juo.c y,iv "nidjj ut u;m mil s.ip u 'it x
"C"IS .iiJJ '4q.fofiu pBi
aj'T if Uiirfnb-suoj pirn 'rfiirti(iatiajin i. ";
-fciipl pun ijoiu 'baiajaua aqi 'u-tppj A'lrKtipxjd pi w
K)Hrf)j M4 'p-JAAdj Hl.M aiiirtddn tl dJUn 1
si! Jl"'.l 'V.'.'.Y 7 -YWa 27 Jl 7! "IVd, ! looia ..'
't.pjo.i j.muo u :inp!Aip"! 'IJ J" A"inl!A -fni'v -n
K MlUUsuoJ (-! brfnqOa pj jo Ajiiuwnh jrns
-w.to.Hi jhijj poopj oi iMAia 'iu.tii.fs nm oj p)"(!
-UllSaW AIBWdJ3Urfq"HJiUM UOlHJV(lrjd UOJT HJUdJ.j
iCEOOIS
STANDARD GOODS.
ISoduoi ioia in lriee.
Donnolly's Yeast Powder.
Callaghan's do. do., & 5 lb. tins.
Callaghan's Cream Tartar.
Callaghan's Eng. Bi-Carb. Soda.
Callaglian's English Saleratus.
English Bi-Carb. Soda in kegs
Best Brands in Market.
FOIt HALE BY ALL VROCKKS.
D. CALLAGHAN & CO.,
Manufacturers,
121 Front Street.
SAX FRANCISCO.
BROWN & LAMBERT
(Be fc Ii.)
A trial will demonstrate that It is the best Axle
Grease manufactured In the United states. Our fa
cilities for manufacturing enable us to compete suc
cessfully in price with other manufacturers.
.Sold wholesale by all the leading houses in San
Francisco.
BROWN & LAMBERT,
Factory nint Ofltor. Nouthwent corner .f
Seventh and liintc Streets,
SAN FRANCISCO.
THE LONDON
Medical and Surgical Institute.
mi.
A. VT. THOKMOX, M. IS. C S. I,
lhys!cian. Surgeon, Oculist and Auri.su
KAS BEEN REORGANIZED AMI REMOVED
TO
No. 4 Hardie Place, Kearny St.,
Between Bush aud Sutter, San Francisco.
EYE AND EAR CASES
A SPECIALTY.
All cases treated under contract. Patients will
thus know beforehand what their medical treat
ment will cost.
Guarantees given in all cases where the nature of
the case Justifies it.
Communications by letter promptly attended to
lOXSl LTATIOXH FREE.
Call or wilte and Judge for yourselves.
R. THOMPSON,
1TTORXEV AT Jj AW,
F00r NO. 7 MOSTCiOM ER Y BLOCK, corner
LV of Montgomery and Washington Streets, San
Francisco.
t-wpeclal attention given to Bankruptcy and
ceuerai practice in the United states Courts.
(P. O. Box 1H19.J
?0l
IIAXLSOX fc KKAMISBI
BOOT AND SHOE MANUFACTURERS.
Bio. 50 Wsnhington Street, below Moutgoni-
ery, San Francihco.
Fine Fr. Calf Boots, made to order, from ?S to I2
Box-Toed Halters, made to order, from f ? to 50
Oxford Tie Shoes, made to order, from 4 to 8
Boys' Boots, made to order, at $5 -
A large and tine assortment of Roots and Shoes
always on hand. None but our own made goods
sold at our establishment.
HOWLAND'S NEW GALLERY,
Xo. S3 Third Street. Sax Fhaxcisco, Cal.
SAVE YOUR MONEY!
BThe Best and. Cheapest Photo-
rrpl,. In tbe Clly ! at No. 35 Third Stbkkt
Corner at Jessie.
B. F. HOWLAND,
Gallery?7 J'ear8 PrPrietor the old New York
X NeKlng Maehl
ne eompieie without the
VrVlTIXCtJ ISO A fit g
!M 7TTriZ.CaR.K1b7 JOITX "' MOONF.Y. No.
' Trinity Street, near Montgomery. (Kn-
S On""0 a..oU rT?," Frw" '
to3.0Q. Also, the California Bias s-uge, Price 75c
DH. DEMAHEST
Has removed his Office to
91 CLAY HTREET. Nar Mnntramrrr.
,1
TRY BOWEN'jJYEAST POWDER
ASK YOriS UlttX'I.It Ktiit IT.
GRAND REDUCTION IN PRICES.
32.. MOIST,
Having just received a Large Invoice of
WEST OF ENGLAND GOODS,
Therefore Informs bis patrons Ihr.t he will n;ak
CLOTiriNO TO ORDER :.t the Lowest CASH
for the next sixty Pays:
Business Suits to Order, - S25
Pants to Order, - - - 0 $6
Dress Suits to Order, $35 to S50
Commercial St., cor. Leidesdorff,
AS D
3STo. G as.0rt.x-33a.3r Street,
SAN FRANCISCO.
CHAS. C. READ,
"Wholesale and Rtt 'dl Deaier ln
CALIFORNIA WINES.
Wines In ces fpnt up in t letraiu ntylei and In
packages, from 5 gallons up. Order them throuzli
your house, or direct o:i uic. and yru receive
satisfaction CHAS C. R KA I '
SOI (nlifornia Street, San Kiam-fim.
patent siiix;i,i: ia isii:.
F. A. HUNTINGTON.
"o. 1 13 and 113 Fremont St., S.m FraiiCis'j.
MANfFACTlBF.lt fK
Shingle, X.atli and Picl:et Machines,
Portable anl Stationary Steam Engine.
Patent Open Nut and Lever Net Head Illocks, and
Naw Mill Machinery of all kinds.
Wakelee's Bath for Sheep.
II. P. WAKELEE V CO.. Importing and Man
ufacturiiiK Unionists, t or. Montgomery
and ICukIi street. Nan Francisco.
LOOK!
A I.ISKItT K. 1! f K B A N K. I m-
Xlft rtai "W'9 Pigeons, Ralbits, mn
re-
43 and 4 I Cal. Market, S. F.
l-!liclose Stnr.1T fnr 1q t-i- r T.T
Please slate where you saw this Advertisement.)
th. 3d Set of Natural
For Kie secret of crow lii" the same
at will. send One Ih.li:ir ami
stamps to Dr. J aciks, Napa. Gal.
WOMEN'S PIONEER HOTEL
3lt BUOAIIWiY, San IranriMO.
-A- Wovol 3Z3xxtoxTxisc.
UNTir, FrixF.n. oknti.emen as well as
Iadies, or Families without Children, havint
good references, admitted. Send postal for Circu
lars containing 16 references, compiising the best
citizens in San Francisco. See report of the Pr:
on Feb. 21 and '2 (Post, Bulletin, ('ail. New AEe. Alu
and others.) MAICTII.l tVHITt:.
Business Manager.
International Hotel,
824 and 826 KEARNY ST.,
8AN FRANCISCO. CAT.
Sl.no ami
S'-i.OU ler- Iy. nu.l !-.
-
the Week.
Coaches with the name of the Hotel " hr '1
Guests to the Hotel Free. Beware of otlier Cow-he
and Runners.
H. C.PATRIDGE.
lrot-tetr.
CALVERT'S
tiV'Jte-'t Irom tne linest of Import
v$m"AVS3 sto. k. Kggs and Fowls at i
.1
JhW&y auceu prices.
T
i B
II JA.
11
V . A. 1 I
if i
- i X
CARBOLIC II
Sheep "Wasli.:i
San Francisco,! CaU
i
1.1 VH
v '