Heppner gazette. (Heppner, Morrow County, Or.) 1892-1912, December 03, 1908, Image 2

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    A Political
By
WELDON
CHAPTER XVI II. (Continued.)
Hope thrilled, his eyes glistened with
Interest.
"Is escape, then, possible?" he demand
ed quickly.
"And easy!"
"Show me the way to freedom, then !"
"You pledge yourself I shall go with
you?"
"Oh. surely:"
"To assist me if I need aid?"
"Yes ."
"To hasten yourself to the execution
of the mission, should I be overcome and
incapacitated by weakness or accident?"
"I promise yon that !"
"And you look like n man who means
what he says, and 1 believe in you." earn
estly said the other. "Very well, then
our course is simple. Alone, I fear I
could not carry out my designs, but you
are strong, fearless, while I am a physical
wreck. There is a window in my cell, un
like your own. An hour's work with the
saw will enable you to break out the
framed grating. Then there is a yard to
cross, a high stone wall to scale, and
liberty! Rut we must wait for nightfall,
for all day long the attendants here are
about the garden."
Hope's energies spurred up as if by
ningic. His crushing exix'rienee of the
past week had well nigh distracted other
than a pained interest in life, but every
man craves liberty, and the prospect of
freedom was alluring.
"I shall certainly hold myself solely at
your service while you carry out this mis
sion of yours," he said.
At the allusion, the former agitation of
his companion recurred.
"My mission:" he repeated, weirdly,
pacing the floor with excitement. "Heav
ens I when I think of it! And only
twenty-four hours left! If I fail! f I
fail :"'
Hope placed a hand soothingly on the
man's arm, for he observed that he was
becoming frightfully worked up.
"Be calm, my friend," he said, reassur
ingly, "you are not going to fail. Is not
the way to freedom open to us?"
"Yes. yes it seems so '."
"Will not I be at your side to assist
you ?"
Then the man's face glowed with hope!
He resumed his place on the bench.
"My name is Warren." he said, after a
long, dreary pause, "and I am an expert
chemist, and agent for the Vulcan Nitro
Glycerine Company of New Y'ork."
So peculiar and grim-sounding was this
announcement that Hope secretly wonder
ed if. after all, the speaker was entirely
responsible for what he said, but the lat
ter proceeded, with a manifest powerful
effort to be cool and coherent :
"It was exactly two months ago yes
terday that I was struck down in the
railroad wreck. This I know by compu-1
tation, for I learned the day of the month
from a newspaper and an overheard con
versation in the garden. It is, therefore,
precisely !.'? days to-morrow morning that
I left in the Vandyke House, at Murry
ville, a satchel containing my latest chem
ical experiment in dynamite."
"You mean? "
VLit I tell you. It is there now, in
the closet of the room I always occupied
when a guest there, pushed way back on
a dusty, unused shelf."
"Ah, I see," nodded Hope, "you fear
someone may discover it, tamper with it,
and create disaster?"
"Not at all !" dissented Warren, sharp
ly. "No one would do that, for the hotel
people understand my ways, and I have
frequently used the room. Again, the
satchel has a warning tag attached that
would at once apprise a meddler of his
risk."
"Then? "
"Listen." proceeded Warren, his tones
shaking "it is nearly ripe!"
"Ripe?"
"Yes."
"I don't understand you."
Warren wrung his hands.
"As a chemist," he said, "I know that
precisely 03 days from the date I made
the mixture spontaneous explosion will
positively materialize!"
Hope gave an awed start, comprehend
ing. "Then, indeed " he began.
"It must be reached, removed, cast into
some deep river bed. Aye ! or a hundred
innocent lives will be blotted out. Why,
man! there is enough dynamite in that
little satcln l to blow the Vandyke House
to atoms in an intsant!"
It was fated that what Warren had
planned should be in a measure carried
jut.
Just after dusk Gideon Hope and his
strange associate in escape removed the
sawed-through window frame, let them
selves down by a trellis to the garden,
found a ladder, and gained the top of the
high stone wall surrounding the private
asylum.
Its broad surface was littered with
broken crockery and glassware. About to
pull up the ladder to drop it over on the
other side, Hope caught a faint moan
from the lips of his companion.
"What is the matter?" he inquired
quickly.
Warren was tottering, and Gideon
grasped him to steady him with his strong
band.
"I have cut my wrist on a fragment
of broken glass!" panted Warren, and if
is bleeding profusely. I am so weak ah,
I feared it! I shall not have the strength
to go with you."
"Nonsense courage !''
"No you must see that. Ah ! now it
la not a question of choice !"
A shout arose from the garden, a
rustling echoed. Two attendants came
into view around the corner of the build
ing. "Halt, there!" was gruffly ordered, and
the click of a revolver cut the air, sharp
and menacing.
Vendetta
J. COBB
CHAPTER XIX.
"Go !'
"And leave you behind never!"
"You must!"
Warren had summoned the strength to
throw himself before Hope, so as to shield
him from the revolver aimed upwards
from the garden.
Thence had arisen the brief instruction:
"Irop the big one he's a special !"
"Jump, I tell you !" insisted Warren.
"They dare not injure me. In two days
I shall be free, but you man I the dyna
mite I Save the innocent lives at that
hotel "
"Yes !" cried Hope, inspired with the
holy purpose indicated.
He leaped backwards. In half a minute
he was safe in the shelter of shrubbery, in
half an hour, at the end of a keen run,
fully four miles away from his recent
prison place.
Now he sat down on a fallen tree to
regain bis breath and calculate what was
to be done, and the speediest way of ac
complishing it.
He had conversed so generally with
Warren that day that he knew he must
lose no time in heading straight and
swiftly for the hotel where the satchel
of dynamite lay.
Hope put aside the exultation of free
dom, the complications of the escape, even
all thoughts of Kane, of Claire, as he
realized the sacred pledge he must fulfill
at all hazards.
Murryville was 20 miles across country.
Ry going back six in the direction of the
asylum he could strike a railroad, but it
might be to run directly into a nest of
attendants on the lookout for him. Again,
he knew nothing of the train schedule. He
resolved to press onward on foot, trusting
to general ideas of direction and distance
to cover the straight twenty miles before
daylight.
Rut. a man badly injured in a brutal
melee and shut up in an unwholesome
prison for a week, Hope found that he
was scarcely in normal shape. lie pro
ceeded more slowly than he had calcu
lated. The lonely country road oppress
ed him. He became footsore and dizzy
headed. Hope welcomed a light shining in the
distance. He kept it in sight as a bea
con, and traced it to the window of a
cabin near a quarry.
A knock at its door brought thither
an uncouth laborer, sleepy eyed and un
civil. "What you want?" he challenged
gruffly.
"A horse, or a horse and vehicle," re
sponded Hope promptly. "Only for a few
hours. See I will pay literally to se
cure the means of getting at once to
Murryville."
"I've got no horse." advised the man.
"nnrl there's no nlace between here and
Murryville that I know of where yon
could get a rig hold on !" he interrupted
himself; "there is.'
"Where?" eagerly demanded Hope.
"Go down the road a mile."
"Yes?'
"You'll come to the old Thorndyke
place. Some strangers have rented it
lately, and they keep a horse and car
riage I've seen 'em."
"Good !"
Hope tossed the man a coin as a re
ward for his cheering information, and
put forward with renewed ardor.
The district was rough, barren and not
a habitation did he pass until he came
in sight of what had once been quite a
pretentious residence, probably formerly
that of some person interested in the
quarries in the vicinity.
It was lighted up, front and side. As
Hope approached, he, too, made out sta
bles at the rear.
"I must get a conveyance here,' he
ruminated. "It is only ten miles to
Murryville. but I don't seem to be able
to walk it on foot. I am dreaming!"
These last words fell from his lips in
a wild gasp, as. crossing an unkept gar
den space, he fixed his eyes upon a man
seated in a lighted room, and smoking
leisu rely.
The windows were open, He lamplight
showed him plainly
"Percy Kane !"
Like one in a trance, rooted, incredu
lous. Hope gazed in at the man. II is
temples throbbed, the old fever of hatred
and vengeance crowded back the mission
that had strangely guided him to this
spot, to this vital, unaccountable discov
ery. Firmly he set his lips Lis hands clos
ed, unclosed his br'-ath came hard. Gid
eon went around to the front. An open
door showed a hallway at its end the
room in which Kane sat.
"He shall tell me of her of Claire!"
hissed IIile, and noiselessly entered the
place.
As he crossed the threshold of the
inner room Kane sprang up. His eyes
dilated. He brushed one hand swiftly
across them, as if to exclude an unreal
vision, though he paled, and his lips iart
ed, aghast.
The sternness of confrontation was lost
for Hope, for as Kane arose a singular
revelation caused the former to stare in
amaze.
About one wrist of Kane was a bright,
strong handcuff, and a chain ran from
this to a stout marble pillar of the orna
mental fireplace.
Iost in wonderment and mystery, Hope
exclaimed :
"What does this mean?"
Kane had grown steadily whiter. Rut
a bitter sardonic sneer made his evil face
now rather defiant and reckless than af
frighted. His lips parted, but ere he could speak
there was a sound in the adjoining room,
a swishing frou-frou, like the rustling of
silken skirts.
(Juick as a flash, Kane turned, pointed
through the opening connecting doorway,
and said in bitter mockery:
-Ask herl"
"Your wife?" breathed Hope, and his
senses reeled us he caught sight of
graceful feminine figure arrayed in taste
ful evening attire.
Claire! His heart seemed burst inn
within him. Claire! Were they to meet
thus at last? .
He took a step forward to address her,
to once more view that lovely beloved
face.
What would she say at the recognition?
What could she say, save to hurl upbn
the man who had driven her to liuk her
destiny with that of the deepest scoundrel
on earth, words of reproach and con
tempt !
"Claire! Miss Ienslow ! Mrs. Kane!"
The woman turned. They came face
to face.
"Great heavens!" rang from Gideon
Hope's ashen lips, his heart in ,a tumult,
as he recoiled with a shock.
CHAPTER XX.
Gideon Hope stood petrified abashed.
He was transfixed with consternation and
incredulity.
"You you are not " he began.
"I am not what?" came the sharp,
quick inquiry.
From the lips of the woman upon whom
he had advanced the words issued. Nev
er for an instant had his gaze left her
face the confrontation, unreal as was
it unexpected, fascinated him.
There she stood a woman to admire,
to wonder at : for most men to worship,
for she was queenly in form and bearing,
her eyes were daz.lingly piercing, her fea
tures statuesquely radiant. She was
naught to Gideon Hope, though for she
was not the woman he had expected to
meet, was not Claire Tremaine or rath
er, Claire Kane, as he had expected to
greet her and find her.
The discovery was a puzzle, and the
puzzle a shock but as yet no ray of the
true light Hooded his mind; only sheer,
profound mystification and bewilderment
permeated.
"You are not his this man's wife,"
stumbled Hope, indicating the manacled
arch-plotter with a movement of his baud
backward.
"Indeed!"
A change went over the tragic face ot
the woman a scornful defiance was pre
sented, and he could not but note these
rapid changes, the intense power of ex
pression. The most superb and skilled
actress could no better potray the emo
tions that were apparently quick-kindling
fuel to a strongly unique temperament.
And, too, Hope fancied in the queerly
iridescent eyes there was a token of
strange import, as though this creature
hovered on a distorted mental balance.
"Ask him!" she said, and power and
triumph greighter her tones that were
part a mocking cry, part a malignant hiss.
With that a quivering indication of
her index finger in the direction of the ad
joining room where Kane sat she turned
coldly and unceremoniously from Hope,
and as she swept past a portiered door
way the overwhelmed intruder slowly,
dubiously moved around, and with vague,
dulled steps returned to the presence of
the man he so hated.
Kane sat as before in the luxurious
armchair as before, the stout chain en
circled one wrist, running to the heavy
marble pillar, and holding him captive.
The pallor that had been occasioned by
the first startling and unexpected appear
ance of Hope had departed. His lip was
curled with a mockery that seemed born
of some mysterious innate confidence. He
regarded his visitor's face sardonically.
Then he burst into a short, harsh and de
risive laugh.
Kane poised motionless and Bilent, try
ing to study out the situation, striving to
analyze the jarring elements that had dis
tracted all his original ideas and purposes.
With cool and contemptuous demeanor
Kane laughed twice again. Then he reach
ed over to the dainty stand at his elbow,
selected a fresh cigar, lit it, sank back
with a chuckle and a grin, and calmly
puffed out the blue leisurely smoke to
wards his enemy.
In all this, Hope suddenly fancied he
detected trickery some diabolical effront
ery that had for its ends the baffling of his
cherished project to discover Claire and
wrest her from the iwer and presence of
this unpunished scoundrel. His muscles
relaxed to grow instantly rigid again, but
menacingly so, for he had both hands
clutched above his head, his eyes aflame,
his white, regular teeth bristling, and he
posed as if to spring upon Kane.
"What !" jeered the other "would you
jump on a h'dpless man !"
(To be continued.)
Tho Voice of Fame.
An American author of some note
was passing a summer in New Hamp
shire. One day he received word that
a distinguished Englishman was visit
ing in the country town and would like
to rail upon the author, of whom, he
added in his note requesting an audi
ence, he had heard.
Somewhat flattered, the author won
dered to himself who had spoken to
the distinguished Englishman about
him.
"Some Oxford dignitary doubtless."
lie reflected, pleasantly, "or possibly
some London publisher or critic," anil
he awaited the stranger's arrival with
interest.
"So you had heard of me," he ven
tured. afteT the usual greetings had
been spoken. "Well, that is odd. Might
I ask who " but his visitor Inter
rupted him.
"Oh, yes." he said. "I heard all about
you before I got here. The porter on
the Pullman told me that you were the
very man to come to to ask about the
best route to Niagara, and what hotel
I'd better stay at."
No Trouble to Stick.
'Yes, sir." said the pompous individ
ual, "it pays a man to stick to his own
business. I made a fortune doing
that."
"What Is the nature of your busi
ness?" queried the interested party.
"I'm a glue manufacturer," was the
significant reply.
Oat for RonlnMH,
The Arctic Explorer Say, can you
tell me where I can find the north
pole?
The Eskimo Nix. If I knew I'd had
It In a museum long ago.
5l A Cnh Morinn Dnot
h ouirmaiiiiG uuai
for Sponge Fishing,
$H$H$Hfe-fHfr't$M$,'t$'$f fr f4'
Through the ingenuity of Vicar Gen
eral Raoul, of Carthage, a submarine
boat for sponge fishing has been per
fected, and bids fair to displace the
dangerous and health ruining process
of sponge gathering by divers. The
submarine boat of Abbe Raoul is rery
much smaller and simpler than its
naval prototypes. It Is 1Q, feet long
and 5 Vi feet in diameter and carries
two men. Its general form Is that of
a cylinder with rounded ends. The
only opening is a man-hole at the top,
which Is surmounted by a turret her
metically closed by a cover that can be
operated equally well from below.
When the vessel Is afloat, it Is possible
to walk on the convex top with the
aid of steel handrails which extend
fore and aft on each side of the turret.
The vessel is caused to sink by open
ing three sea-cocks and thus Ailing as
many water ballast tanks. Two of
these tanks, pi ami anildshlp in the
bilge, to port and starboard, have a
combined capacity of 154 gallons of sea
water, the weight of which balances
most of the buoyancy and brings the
top of the boat nearly awnsh. These
two tanks are to be kept rilled, as a
rule, but they can be emptied by means
of a hand pump. The third tank, which
Is placed between the other two, holds
only seventeen gallons.
The water flows In directly from the
sea and Is forced out by connecting the
tank with two reservoirs which contain
air at a pressure of loO atmospheres.
A SUBMARINE BOAT
Small movements of ascent and descent
can be made and controlled readily by
manipulating the compressed air valve.
In ease of accident a lead weight of
LfiOO pounds, which forms the anild
shlp section of the keel, can be Instant
ly detached, causing the lightened ves
sel to rise rapidly to the surface.
The boat is propelled by means of
two steel oars, with feathering blades
The oars pass through the hull in
water-tight spherical Joints which give
freedom of motion In every direction.
Similar joints are used on the torpedo
tulies of warships.
Attached to the forward fixed sec
tion of the keel Is a whetd on which
Abbe Raoul exeet8 his unique vessel
to travel over the level bottom of hard
sand on which the sponges are found.
Ry regulating the supply of compressed
air to the small ballast tanks the pres
sure of the wheel on the sea bottom
can be made as small as Is desired, and
there is no apparent reason why the
VPSSp should not be propelled over the
bottom by the oars for it has no otlur
motor. The purpose of this device is
to evade the necessity of rising from
the sea bottom, and consequently draw
ing on the supply of compressed air in
moving from place to place In search
of sponges. Raoul's first boat had a
similar wheel. wider- worked very well.
The sponge fishing apparatus con
sists of a movable arm which projects
from the lower part of the curved bow.
through a water-tight spherical joint,
and carries cutting pincers at its ex
tremity. By means of this device,
operated by a man inside the hull, the
sponge Is cut loose and deposited In n
large iron basket suspended from the
end of a fixed tubular arm of sheet
Iron, which occupies nearly the place of
the bowsprit of a ship. To the middle
of this fixed arm are attached electric
lamps and a reflector for the purjiose of
illuminating the sen bottom, which can
le observed through n bull's eye in the
bow of the lioat. These lamp, as well
as those which light tho interior of the
vessel, are supplied with current by a
small battery of accumulators, A ball
of lead attached to a steel wire can be
raised and lowered by means of a wlnd
lasj Inside the tubular arm. and thus
serves the piinose of an anchor. The
windlass Is oierated by gearing ter
minating In a shaft which passes
through a stuffing box Into the Interior
of the boat and which bears a crajk
handle at Its Inner end. Provision la
also made for telephonic communica
tion between the submerged boat and
a flouting vessel. Montreal Star.
LION INVADES THE CAMP.
African Traveler TellH of n Kell
Inic Adventure In Thorn luelonure.
"When in Somallland, Africa, I had
an exciting adventure with a black
maned lion," writes a correspondent
"I had intended to reach a village one
night, but it was getting dark, ami we
were a couple of hours' march olf ; so.
finding an old zareba, or thorn Inelos
ure, we went Into it. This zareba cov
ered half an acre. It was only about
four feet high and four feet thick, the
thorny branches composing it huvtns;
sunk down and fallen apart.
"We repaired about 100 yards of it.
pitched our tout, and the cook got his
fire lighted, gave me some dinner, and
I turned in. Our nineteen camels are
squatted in a circle to the right of the
tent, our horses were tethered near to
them and our twenty-one men lighted
three or four fires, cooked their food
and lay down to sleep around the cam
els. We also had five donkeys teth
ered to two or three saplings, which
were growing about two paces in front
of the tent, and, the.ffore, toward th
center of the zareba.
"About 2 o'clock in the morning I
was awakened by two feeble brays, fol
lowed by a third. Lighting a candle,
I tumbled out in my pajamas and got
hold of my rifle and a couple of car
tridges, to meet the Somali hunters
shoving their woolly heads through the.
tent door, saying, 'Waraba!' (hyena).
Deep growls were going on, ami I at
once felt sure that it was no hyena,
but a lion. In the zareba. Fortunate
ly, the camels did not stampede.
"It was pitch dark, but I saw thn.
one of the five donkeys tethered in front
of the tent was gazing Intently toward
the left and center. The other four
FOR SPONGE FISHING.
hud disapiieared. There was a black
mass discernible in the center of the
zareba, which, however, I found in the
morning to be simply a mass of oltl
dried thorn brandies, so the six or
eight shots I fired at it in the darkness
did little harm.
"The nun were now bushing the fires
and the cook supplied four or five of
the men with sticks and with kerosene
and rapidly made some torches. I then
noticed that the donkey was gazing
more to the left of the center, and,
guided by the growling which was giv
ing on continuously and furiously, I
crept on my hands and knees past tin
donkey for a couple of yards. The
men with tho torches were then a little
behind my right shoulder.
"Suddenly the torches flamed up
brightly and, the light being behind me
somewhat, I was not dazzled by it, but
saw the lion dragging off a donkey. It
did not take me more than one second
to snap both barrels at him, and hla
growjs at once ceased. After putting
in two more cartridges and having the
torches retrinuned, we again advanced,
to find the lion lying on his side, giving
a few expiring gasps. His nose touched
the donkey's throat, a trickle of blood
flowed down from tinder his left eye,
and. as I afterward found, he had got
my second bullet In the nape of tho
neck."
How Bird Meet Emergencies,
Dr. Francis II. Herriek says a spar
row will pluck a horsehair from the
mouth of a nestling, while another bird,
like an oriole, will stand by and see
Its mate hang until dead without at
tempting to release It.
A robin will tug at a string which
has caught on a limb, but is never seen
fully to meet the situation by releasing
the string. It will make several turns
of a cord about a limb and leave the
other end free without any relation to
the nest, so that Its effort Is useless.
It ties no knots.
The gull, according to abundant and
competent testimony, will carry shell
fish to a considerable height, drop them
on the rocks or hard ground and repeat
the exjieriment until It gets the soft
meat. Chicago Tribune.
Even when the unexpected happens
there Is always some fellow around to
say : "I told you so."
It's always better to throw bouquets
than It la to band lemons.
(CDEERJCSEB
Tea Is a germicide according to a Bos
ton physician, who claims It Is an es
pecially rank enemy of tho typhoid
bacillus.
Missouri led in the production of
lead In tho United States In 1!K)7, push
ing Idaho, the leader lu 190(1, back to
second place.
Although the house fly lays eggs, the
flesh fly, better known as the "blue
bottle," produces living larvae, about
fifty at a time.
A $10,000 plant for the production of
ozone by electrolysis, the largest In tho
world, has been completed nt a Pitts
burg hospital.
A Norwegian factory receives power
for six turbines from water that falls
3.2.S7 feet through a tunnel from a lake
seven miles away.
Peru has officially adopted as Its
standard time th'at of the seventy-fifth
meridian, the same as "eastern time
In the United States.
The electrical equipment of the Cu
nard liner Mauretania includes over
2,"iO miles of cables, and more than
0,000 l(5-caiidle-power lamps.
Three parts by weight of boraclc acid
to one of powdered borax makes a good
compound for brazing steel. It should
bo applied as a paste with water. ,
On the west coast of India Is found
a sMfles of oyster. Planum placenta,
whose shell consists of a pair of rough
ly circular plates about six Inches In
diameter, thin and white. At present
these oysters are collected for the pearls
which they often contain, although few
are fit for the use of the jeweler. But
In. the early days of English rule In
India the shells were employed for
window-panes. Cut into little squares,
they produced a very pretty effect, ad
mitting light like frosted glass. When
the Bombay cathedral was built, nt the
beginning of the eighteenth century, Its
windows were pnned with there oyster
shells. In Goa they are still thus em
ployed. Prof. Arthur O. Lovejoy, as the re
sult of an Inquiry Into the origin and
meaning of "lire cults," so common
nniong ancient nations and among mod
ern savage and barbarous tribes sug
gests that many races conceived the
"sacred fire," not as a practical con
venience or an ancient custom or a
means of frightening demons, but as
a vehicle of life, or magical energy,
the prosperity of the household or tribe
depending In part on the perpetuity,
vitality and purity of the fire. It was
thought of as subject to a tendency to
grow old and weak, like nil natural
foroes hence the custom of periodical
ly renewing It. This conclusion Is based
partly upon the statements made by tho
Iroquois Indians and the Maoris.
Dr. Robert E. Coker. writing to Sci
ence from Lima, advocates the protec
tion of the guano-producing birds the
"guanae," a ppoeies of cormorant, and
the "alcatraz," a species of pelican -in
order that the Peruvian deposits of
this valuable manure may be In part,
renewed. The great ancient deposits,
he says, are now almoRt non-existent
Only the lower grades of guano are left
But the birds annually make fresh de
posits on their nesting grounds, ami If
they were properly protected, he be
lieves that the annual supply of fresh
deposits would be largely Increased.
The birds, he says, should no longer
be treated as wild animals. They should
be regarded as valuable domestic ani
mals. At present they are decreasing
In number, but this decrease could be
checked. They are also driven from
their haunts during the season when
they should be allowed to remain there
When driven away by the presence of
man during the nesting season, they
spend a large part of their time upon
the water, or on small Islets and cliffs,
where the deposits are either lost en
tirely or are rendered less available.
(lathering Hoaen.
I've gathered roses ami the like In
many glad and golden Junes, but "now.
as down the world I hike my weary
hands are filled with prunes. I've gath
ered roses o'er and o'er, and some were
white and some were red, but when I
tcok them to the store the grocer want
ed eggs Instead. I gathered roses long
ago, In other days. In other scenes, and
people said. "You ought to go and dig
the weeds out of your beans." A million
roses bloomed and died; a million more
will die to-day. That man Is wise who
lets them slide and gathers up the bales
of hay. Emporia Gazette.
SrnuilnK 1,'p the Wreckage.
The owner of the racing automobile
was a novice at the sport. Naturally,
he felt rather mystified when the ex
pert driver handed him t he following
bill on the morning after the race:
Gasoline, $C0; repairs to car, $70; cut
ting expenses. $1.1100.
"What the deuce," Raid the amateur
owner. "Is the meaning of this Item,
'Cutting expenses?"
"Oh. that." observed the chauffeur
carelessly "represents the surgeon's fee
for renovating my mechanic. Judge.
Setting It Hiirht.
"In your paper this morn ing, sir, you
called me a 'bum actor.' I want an
explanation."
"I shall be happy to explain, young
man. That word 'actor' was Inserted
by the proofreader, who thought I had
omitted It accidentally. I shnll take
care that It doesn't happen again.
Chicago Tribune.
A turkey Is never tough because ha
is so good he is never allowed to be
come old.