HEPPNER GAZETTE.
PAPER
Now that tbe campaign is ooming on
every subscriber of the Gazette should
provide bimaelt or heraell with a news
paper uf more than iooal importance.
The Gazette shop is the place to subscribe
for all periodicals. Don't forget that the
Gazette needs all arrearages, even
though Christmas comes but once a
vear.
OFFICIAL
NOTHING RISKED,
NOTHING MADE.
The man wbo advertUes, geU tlie cash.
Notice it.
WEEKLY rtO. .172.1
SEMI-WEEKLY NO. 207. 1
HEPPNER, MORROW COUNTY, OREGON, TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 20, 1894.
ELEVENTH YEAH
1,'d,
EMI WEEKLY GAZETTE.
rUUMSHBD
Tuesdays and Fridays
BY
THE PATTERSON PUBLISHING COMM.
ALVAH W. PATTERBON Bus. Manager.
OTIS PATl'KKBON Editor
At $2.5' t per year, $1.25 for six months, 75 cts.
for t!ir;ti muiicna.
Advertising Rates Made Known on
Application.
The "IE .LQ-X-a," of Long Creek, Grant
County, Oregon, is published hy the same com
pany every Friday morning. Subscription
price 52 per year. Foradvortislngratee, address
o-eaiS x. ri.xa?X!X2SOiT, Editor and
Manager, Long Creek, Oregon, or
Uoppuer, Oregon.
"liazette,1
A Year's Subscription to a Pop
ular Agricultural Faper
GIVEN FREETOOURREADERS
THIH PAl'KltiB kept on tile at E. (,. Dako 8
L Advertising Agency, l and tio Merchants
risohangs, Han FruuciBCo, California, where cc
ractB for advertising can be uiado tor it.
THE UAZlS'lTH'S AU SNTS.
Wagner,....'
Arlington
Lou, Creek,
Echo, :
Cmuus Prairie,
Nye, Or
Uardinan, Or.,
Hamilton, Urant Co., Or
ione.
Prairie City, Or.,,
Mn von Oily, Or.,
Pilot Hock
unyville, Di'., .
, John Dav, Or
Athena, or
I'.-niieioli, Or.,
Mount Vernon, Grant Co., Or.
Shelby, Or.,.
(ox, uranivV' .V V . A.hbiiwh
B. F. llevland
' " , PoBtinaster
K. M. Johnson
J. l(. E teb
....... Herbert halstead
Jan. i.eaen
.B. A. Huusaker
..Phill Heppner
The Eagle
Postmaster
. . Oscar De Vaul
H. C. U right
PosnniiSter
.. . . Postinai-ter
T. J. Carl
..R. 11. Mcllalev
. H. L. Parrish
G. P. Skelton
. J. E. rinou
..F. 1. McCulluiii
..John Ellington
l'ostuiasler
. Postmaster
. .Miss Stella r'leti
J. l. A lie
Ly a special arrangement with the
publishers we are prepared to furnish
FREE to each of our readers a year's
subscription to the popular mouthly
agricultural journal, the Americas
Fakmeh, published at Springfield aud
Cleveland, Ohio.
Tiiis offer is made to any of our sub
soribers who will pay up all arrearages
on subscription aud one year in advance,
ami to nny uew subscribers who will pay
one veal in auviiDce. ine amjsiuuah
Farmkk enjoys a larjie national oircnla-
tmn. anil rnuKS among the leading
agricultural papers. By this arrange
ment it COSTS YOU NOTHING to re
oeive the Amkmcan Farmed for one
year, It will be to your advantage to
oail promptly. Sample oopies can be
s 'n at our office.
KiyUt Jlile, or
Upper KUea Creek,.
Douglas, Or
Lone Kock, Or
Uuofeberry
Condon, Oregon.
' AN AUlifiT WANT1SD IN KVKKY FKISCiNCT.
Union Paofio Railway-Local card.
No. 10. mixed leaves Heppner 9:4' p. in. daily
except Sunday
10, " ar. nt Willows Jo. p.m.
9, " leaveB " B a. ui.
j, ar. at Heppner 5:00 a. m. dailj
except. Monday. .... . , ,
East bound, main line ar. at Arlington 1..B -i. m.
Went lwVB8
Westbound lo-al fr.ugh leav Arlington 8.
a m arrives at The Udles 1:11 p. ui. Local
5"SlSar.Tu- Dalle, at atWp. m. arriv.s
at Portland at 7:00 p m.
DI3TI0HHEY .&
T SPECIAL
1 J
or-' noiAL X3i;
the hills" and
never excell
ed. "Tried
andproven "
is the verdict
of millions.
Simmons
Liver Regu
lator' is the
?5fonly Liver.
JLJ Of tO and Kidney
medicine t o
which you
can pin your
faith for a
cure. A
mild laxa
tive, and
purely veg
etable, act
ing directly
on the Liver
and Kid
neys. Try it.
Sold by all
Druggists in Liquid, or in Powder
to be taken dry or made into a tea.
The King of Liver Medicines.
" 1 have used yourSimmons Liver Regu
lator and can couselenciously say it is the
king orall liver medicines, I consider It a
medicine chest in Itself. Geo. W. Jack
son, Tacoma, Washington.
AS-ICVERY PACKAGE'S
Uu the Z Stamp In red on wrapper.
Than
Pills
A WANDERING CKOWN.
Wonderful Vicissitudes of the Sil
ver Coronet of Hungary.
Tragic Incident. In the History of the
Various Rulers wno n -
Famous Emblem of a Double
Monarchy.
G. A. R. NOTICE.
-TO
United States Ottlclttla.
i .f ...G rover Cleveland
Seciolaryor'lreaanry JoUHokeSnn
"f " v:;.v::.VDau;ef1skuom
Attoniey-Ueueral.
..Wl
liieharu o. uiuey
BBOWtary of Agriouliure J. ooeriinB
State ol Oregou.
8. Peunoyer
...U. VV. lulinue
...rhil. lietsclian
....E. U. Mclilroy
t J. It. Mik'.liell
BountofB ) J. N. Uolpli
Governor
Secretary of State
Treasurer
Bupt. I'ublio lustrui tion.
CongrefiBuien.
Printer
l liuiger Hermann
; W. tv. liliis
Frank O. Haker
i K, A. Moore
. . .. 1 W. P. uord
Supremo Judges K. S. beau
Seventh Judicial District.
. i .. VV. L. Bradehaw
Circuit Judge w H Wila .u
l'rosecucing Attorney . n. hub n
Morrow Comity Officials.
. Henry Blaekraan
jcliii Senator iieiuj .
ttepruBentative ;;j;H'll8 Keillils
a KRANtiKMENT WITH THE
publishers, .re are able to obtain a number
of th above book, and propose to lurnisn
........ ,n ,d,.h rtf n,ir HiihRp.Hhers.
The dictionary is a necessity In every home,
school n urt business house, it nils a vacancy
.,,.,! ,MP,,iui,.. l-nntt'lciup which no one hun
,lred other volumes of the choicest books could
suiuiiv Voimgnnd old, educated and ignorant.
rich and poor,.should have It wltnin reacn, an
..r..,. t.. i,D IomTm Hvprv dav in the vear.
A n, ne have asked 11' this is really the Orig
inal Webster's Unabridged Dictionary, we are
able to state we have learned direct from the
publishers the tact, mat tins is me veiy .ui.
comnletc on which about forty of the best years
ot the author's life were so well employed in
writini'. It, contains the entire vocabulary of
about 100,000 words, including the correct spell
ing derivation and definition of same, and is
the' regular standard size, containing about
:) 000 square inches of printed surface, and is
bound in cloth half morocco and sheeD.
Until further notice we will furnish this
valuable Dict:onary
First To any new subscriber.
Second To any renewal subscriber.
Third To any subscriber now in arrears
who pays up and one year in advance, at
the following prices, viz:
Full Cloth bound, gilt side and bad
stamps marbled edges $i-oo.
Half Mo occo, bound, gilt side and back
damns marD ed edres, St.o.
Full Sheep bound, leather label, marbled
edges, $2.00
Fifty cents added in all cases for express
age to Heppner.
.rTaffl-AB Hie nuhiishers limit the time and
number of books they will furnish at the low
in udvis.. oil ivho desire to avail them
selves' of ibis greatopportiinity to attend to it
,it once.
cslbi Franoisoo
And all points in California, via the lit. Shasta
route of the
Southern Paeifie Co.
rhe great highway through California to all
pointa East and South. Grand Scenio Route
of the Pacific Coast. Pullman Buffet
Sleepers. Seooud-olaBS Sleepers
Attachedito express trains, attordmg superior
accommodations for second-clase passengers.
For rateB, tickets, Bleeping car reservations,
etc.. call npon or address
K. KOEHLEK, Manager, E. P. K0G3RS, Asst.
Hen. K & P. Agt.. Portland, Oregon.
ui ntv Judge..
1 (JommisBioners..
J. M. Uaker.
Clerk
Sheriff
Treasurer
Assessor
" purveyor
School Sup t...
' Coroner
'.Geo. W. Vincent
J, VV. Morrow
(too. Noble.
W. J. L ezei
It. L. haw
.lea lirown
,.V. L. Salins
T. W. Ayera. J i
SILVKK'S CHAMPION
HEPPNKB TOWN OFl'ICEBS.
. J. II. Simons
Sjayoi.. K, 'VanlBWonh. M
Louuellnien ' , if ..irlils
Lichlenthal, ()ti, Patterson, Juliua tt.tmy.
W. A. Joruiatou, J- L.Yeugor. lth(.,B.
Recorder y, Slocum
freasurei j w Basmiif.
Ularahal
PriciuctOffleeiP.
t. .1 . naiiin'
'.'.'.'. ".V:. W. Hjcliard
Jueticeof the Peace
Constable
United states Land OHicerx.
THK DALLES, OK.
;the:
taky-. Mountain-:-News
J, W. Lewis.
T.S. Lang....
,lt gis' it
Heceiv r
LA ORANUK, OR.
B.F, Wi'snn...
J. H. Jtobbins..
. . Begiiter
. . Keceiver
6ECBET SOCIETIES.
Doric Lodge No. K. ;.f. l';
(' $k their' Sue Hull. Natio.,,,1 Hank miLI-
'.'7i(A ing. Sojuiiiu
THE DAILY-BY MAIL.
Subscription price reduced as follows
One Year (bi m til)
Six Month "
Tlirre Months "
One Month "
$6 00
3 00
1 50
BO
IHE WEEKLY-BY mail
One. Year (in Advance) :
$1 00
atlonal Bank of Hspprtsi.
W. PEULANO, ED. K. BISHOP.
President. Cashier.
THAN S ACTS'; Ar46 ENEll AL BAN KING
COLLECTIONS
Made on Favorable Terms.
EXCHANGE BOUGHT & SOLD
HEPPNER. tf OREGON
Free
A. Gulden
Medicine!
Suffering
Opportunity for
Humanity.
Physicians Give their Hemedle to the People
DO YOU SUFFER ? gnr?rbTe.eSn;vne
will send you FREE OF CHA KGE a full course
of specially prepared remedies best suited to
your case, we wain, yum icuu.,.,c,.v........
We can cure the most aggravated aiseases oi
both sexes. Our treatment tor all diseases ann
deformities are modern and scientific, acquired
by many year's experience, which enables us to
Guarantee a Cure. Do not despair.
. B. - We have the only positive cure for Ep
ilepsy (fits) and Catarrh. References given.
permanently locaieu. uiu ctu,j,hvu.
no w 1 1 i.i.mr Mroicai, ANn SUKfilf'AT, TNSTI-
tutk', 719 Market Street, San Francisco, Cal.
"More precious to the loyal Magyar
heart than all the embarras de richesses,
whether of barbaric rudeness or me-
livn.l snlendor. is the ancient silver
crown of Hungary battered, dinted
and black as old iron. We gaze on it,"
says a writer in the Argosy, "with rev
erential awe; for surely no crown in
the world has undergone such wonder
ful vicissitudes. When the royal line
of Orfad became extinct Hungary was
filled with confusion. llie pope
crowned one candidate; the diet elected
another, who immediately donned the
coronation robes and the silver crown.
Ilis pretensions were speedily sup
pressed by the king of liohemia, who
surrounded the walls of Burta with his
troops, and carried off both king and
crown to an impregnable Bohemian
fortress.
"Otto of Bavaria was then chosen by
the llungarians as their future ruler,
n-i condition that he should first re
cover the famous crown, with which
the fortunes of Hungary have ever
been so closely connected. The Ba
varian prince agreed to the conditions,
and, disguising himself in the garb of
,.rtl,ot,l hf. Kni. fnvt.ll nil his nuest
. .-, 1. J,1 In unrl.r Tl I
aUU rt'UCllUU UUliliiitw amv.ji.
speedily learned that the country was
on the verge of ruin; war had deci
mated the population and exhausted
the national finances. The land was
unfilled and the resources of the king
dom at the lowest ebb. Under these
circumstances the value of the Hun
garian crown as a trophy of victory
was at a discount, me misiortunes oi
the impoverished state and the dire
necessities to which it was reduced de
stroyed chivalrous sentiment and na
tional pride. The supposed merchant
profited by the situation, and soon en
tered into such successtul negotiations
with the harassed and pauperized
government that he was enabled to se
cure the possession of the silver crown.
"Elizabeth, the widowed queen of
King Albert of Hungary, was the next
to disturb the safety of the silver
crown. The death of the king had
plunged the country into a vortex of
strife and confusion. In the midst of
the contest she resolved to escape
from the dangers which threatened
her, taking with her the ancient
crown. After taking refuge in Ger
many she was reduced to abject pover
ty, and in her distress she pawned the
historic crown of Hungary . to Em
peror Frederick for three thousand
ducats. Indignation fired every patri
otic Magyar heart; war was declared,
and, after much bloodshed, the bat
tered crown was recovered by the Hun
garian army and taken back in triumph
to Buda, where it was locked up in a
fortress and guarded night and day by
two state dicnitaries chosen from the
Magyar nobility. The strife ana tu
mult which for so many centuries sur
rounded the silver crown only in
creased its moral value and heightened
its significance, finally winning the
due recognition of Hungarian needs
and requirements. The brave Magyar
race stoutly refused to denationalize
itself by incorporation with Austria,
and at last the necessity of self-government
for Hungary was admitted.
Francis Joseph of Hapsburg was sol
emnly crowned king of Hungary as
well as emperor of Austria, and ac
cepted with the silver crown the double
responsibility of the double monarchy. "
We take this opportunity of informing
our subscribers that the new oommis
siouer of pensions has been npnointed
He is an old soldier, and we teliove
that soldiers and their heirs will re
ceive justice at bis bauds. We do not
anticipate tbat tbere will be any radius!
changes in the administration of poneioi
affairs uuder the new regime.
We would advise, however, thnl U. 8
soldiera, sailors and their beirs, take
fltens to make application at onoo, if
they have not already done so, in order
to secure the benefit of tbo early filing
of their claims in case tbere should be
any future pension legislation. Suoh
legislation is seldom retroaotive. lhere
fore it is of reat importance that ap
plications be filed iu tbe department at
the earliest possible date.
If the U. S soldiers, sailors, or their
willows, children or parents desire in
formation iu regard to pension mattei-B,
they sbould write to tlie Press Claims
Company, at Washington, IX C, aud
they will prepare aud send the necessary
application, if they fiud them entitled
uudei the numerous laws enacted foi
their benefit. Address
PKESS CLAIMS COMPANY,
John Weudehburn, Managing Attor
ney, Washington, D. C, P. O. Box 380
If.
Highest of all in Leavening Powor.--Latest U. S. Gov't Report.
PURE
THE WESTERN l'EDACOUUE.
We are in receipt of the May number
of our state school paper. It exceed
any of the former numb rs ir value.
Tlie paper this month contains many
uew and valuable features. The illus
trated series on the schools of the otate
ia introduced by a paper oil the Friend:'
Polytechnic Institute at Salem, Oregon.
These papers cannot fail to be of great
value both to the sohools an 1 to the
,,,,l,Ho
Tluire are also several Cue articles
by our bast writers and the department
"Current Events,""Saturday Thoughts,1
"Kfinoational News" "The Oracle
Answers, Correspondents," etc, end
nnntuin much valuable reading foi
teachers or paieuts. The magazine
has about 50 pages of matter, wel
printed aud arranged. We pronouuot
the Western Pedngogue the best ediicu
lional monthly on the oonst.
Everyone of our readers should haVi
the naoer it thev are at all interested
in eduoation. No teaoher school direo
tor or student cau get along well with
out it. We will receive Bnbsoript.oni-
t h'i office. " Price only $1.00 a"yeaf
When desired we will seud the Weeteri
Pedagogue and Gazette one year to on
n.lrlresa for StS00 Call and examiu
oo,t,lfi nnnies. Teachers, directors an
parents, now is the time to (-ubsenbe.
'A LITTLE NONSENSE."
Voio- from the Oago "The saloon,"
in r;'"Oi!ii ; drawled, "is the house that
Jagy built." Buffalo Courier.
r-"Have you really signed as pitcher
on the nine?" she asked, breathlessly. ''1
have," ho an-iwercd. "Then I am
,3wers." she replied. Puck. t,,t
Mrs. Bloodgood "What! not an
open flre-placo nor a stove in the whole
house? How does your father warm his
ilippcrn, Willie?" Willie (ruefully)
'Warms Vm on me, ma'am." Burling
ton Freo Press.
Corning from the Theater. Wife
vto hu'iband) "I enjoyed the play ever
so much. It is an excollent piece of
dramatic w rk a ripe production, l
think." "Yes, a mellow drama. Ar-
kansaw Traveler.
Miss Iuohretta Cumberland (seat
ing herself at the melodeon) "Jennie,
come hcah, rjleaae." Jennie "What fo'
totu'n the leaves?" "INo; 1 want ye
to lit' up do keys when dey stick down."
Harper's Bazar.
M ust Go by Rule. Chief "Have you
trot an v clows?" Subordinate "No, but
l'vocaught tho criminal." iniei --wen,
you must go out and get a few clews. It
.;n A Knnlr oafl.l iahnri
AN OBLIGING MIDSHIPMAN.
,.. II l HI.
VV. V. C IIAWFOUD,
N. t'.KOWN.
, ,il It .V. J.
HAVVL1NS POST, N i. SI.
G. A. R.
..,, t l,inun. Or., the last Saturday of
.. mouth. All veterans are invited b
' Adjutant.'
If
join.
. smth.
1'oiuuiuuilel
peofsss:
The N'e .vs is the only consistent c .a'rpion of
silver In the West, mid should be ill every home
hi the West, and in the liaiulH ot every miner
1 business man In Colorado.
imiiI in your sitl,Kcr.itious Ht once.
Address
t :-.: BTBWB,,
Pcnvcr, Colo
ARL YOU ANY GOOD AT ITZZLES ?
The genius who Invented the "Fifteen" puz
zle, "Pigs In Clover." and many otners, nas in
vented a brand new one, which Is going to be
the greatest on record. There is fun, instruc
tion and entertainment in it. The old and
learned will Hildas mncll mystery In It as the
young and unsophisticated. This great puzzle
s the property of the New York Press Club, for
whom It was invented by Samuel Loyd, the
great puzzlelst, to be sold for the benefit of the
movement to erect a great home for newspaper
workerB in New York. Generous frlendB have
given $25,000 in prizes for the successful puzzle
solvers. TEN CENTS sent to the "PreBB Club
Building and Chrrity Fund," Temple Court,
New York City, will get you the mystery by
return mail.
aooooooooooo
ONo mineral water will pro- J
auce tne Denenciai results
8
all
A ROBERTS, R'
-f-- mice inn! CnHcctiiii'H.
Council Chambers, Heppner. r
tut.., Irs
( fiio'
S. P. FLORENCE,
LIT M BE II!
.. -if mm KOI! SALE ALL K'IND.S OF UN
, 'ilressi'dl.incticr IR wiles of Heppner, at
I: I'
v xxrivtiijij. !
- J10 on i
ifc
uul 1,11
rl.K i li
r K HEI.IVKKKIi IN
HEPPNER,
ail.lllioiial.
WILL ADD
;. I!A.IIIT), Prop.
ilmnlltona I,t-'s:r
. I fO'o'iX O.iNTRAL 1
(Northern Pacific R. R. Co., Lessee.)
LATEST TIME CARD
Two Through Trains Daily.
STOCKRAISER
HEPPNEK, OREGON.
Cattle branded and ear marked as suo,u a
tlorses F on light shoulder. nmti,,n COT.
Tiction ol any person todiM my tvx
o mnVi "5nmlLv.MlnnepnliArl8.40amH.2npm
l i'S 17 isnml ,v . . .St. Pan 1 . . .A r8.0lami3.40pm
1'i,praimpm!Lv...Duluth i... Aril 10"
i-.PM'liV . flsinanu.. '
7 15am in.S.mAr... Chicago. ..Lv 5.00p
I I . !
5 that follow taking one or
more of
Beecham's
f with a glass of water immediate- Vr
C ly upon arising in the morning. Q
Painless. Effectual, Covered with
gm a Tasteless, Soluble Coating.
"Worth aGuinea a Box.'" Price Q
only S5 cents.
Of all druggists, or a box will be
mailed on receipt of 1 cts. in stamps
B. F. Allen Co., io5 Canal St., N. V, J
COOOOOOOOO 17 o
,0.40"
icketssold and baggage checked through to
points in the l.'nited Slates and Canada
,11 points i'"rw- with all
Close coniicrini,,
trains ftoing East and South.
For full information apply to your n earest
p'a.s'I'.ndTkt At., MUw.uke.; WU.
" 3033 PARCELS OP MAIL" F&EB
i.,H FOR 10 1-GENT STAWP
,', :r."J '.'( ,.1" ii
Urt'HS I trxwivcu vvn,i4iii
days will be for 1 year boldly
fin (lieu ou nuiuuieu
abelH. Only DirffUiry
guarunieeintf
customers ; from pub
llMhers and munufac
turera you'll rert'lva
probably, thounundR ol
ftflmnlfs.miieeine-i.eic
ah frtm and ewh imne.
with one of your PJ!2!Ji,rf'uIMwii1
PHStr-d thereon. EXTHA I U e wll
alt print and prepay pontage on ,x u o;
your label address to you; lr,ut
stick on vour envelopes, bojk,
prevsnt thPlr being iosi. . " r"
r of Heidiivtlie, N. i, wrlte : ; 1 n n
j my 2r cent dirw in vour I h
' ii!;i(inSi puMiKhf TK J"d nm'ii'i ' .
i i- "
':iLJ-' ' '' 'i i
ea woui.D'9
f'AIR I)IU::CT,JllY CO.,
No. 147 Frankford and Giraru Aves. j-niiioei.
phta, P.
ORIGIN OF THE EAR.
Nature Made It Out of the Gill of the
Fish Lons Ages Ago.
When the fish came ashore, its water- 1
breathing apparatus was no longer of ,
any use to it, writes Prof. Henry
Drummond in McClure's Magazine. At
first it had to keep.it on, for it took n
lonpr time to perfect the air-breathing j
apparatus which was to replace it.
But when this was ready the problem
was, what to do with the earlier organ?
Nature is exceedingly economical, and
could not throw all this mechanism
away. In fact Nature almost nover
parts with any structure she has once
made. What she does is to "change it
into something else. Conversely, Na
ture seldom makes anything new; her j
method of creation is to adapt some
thing old. Now when Nature started
out to manufacture ears, she made
them out of tho old breathing ap
paratus. She saw that if water could
pass through a hole in tne necu, .sound
could pass likewise, and she set to
work upon the highest up of the five
gill-slits and slowly elaborated it into
a hearing organ.
There never had been an external
car in the world till this was done, or
any good ear at all. Creatures which
live in water do not seem to use hear
ing much, and the sound waves in
fishes are simply conveyed through
the walls of the head to the internal
ear without any definite mechanism.
Hut as soon as land life began, owing
to the chamred medium through which
sound waves must now be propogatcd,
a more delicate instrument was re
quired. And hence one of the first
things attended to was the construc
tion and improvement of the ear.
Crazr Over Handkerchiefs,
very strange case was recently
heard in a Vienna police court. A
monomaniac, who was formerly a
well-to-do baker, had ruined himself
by a mania for collecting handker
chiefs. At the commencement of the
pursuit of this singular hobby he used
to pay as much as four or five pounds
for a coveted mouchoir. Ilis devotion
to this fad brought him to poverty.
He then fell to stealing. At length he
was apprehended, and on search being
made by the police in his apartments.
a collection of 1,434 of these articles
was found, all classified according to
the special perfumes with which they
had been scented. The magistrate or
dered the unfortunate man to be taken
to a lunatic asylum.
Jumped Into tho Sea to Give a Sblpmati
a Chance ror 1'romouon.
An anecdote is related by our Paris
correspondent of Admiral Avclan, who
is in command of the llussian squadron
which has been visiting Toulon.
When. manv years ago, he was
cruising in the Baltic, as
midshipman, among the men on
board his ship was a former captain
of a man-of-war, "broken" for insult
ing an admiral, and reduced to a com
mon seaman. The young officer con
sidered it a sacred duty to treat this
unfortunate man with all the kindness
consistent with the regulations, and to
trv everything to start him afresh on
his career. A pardon could be granted
onlv for an act of bravery.
"Next time a storm comes on," Ave-
lan said to the ex-captain, "I will drop
into the sea as if by accident. You
will jump in after ine, and thus win
your epaulettei" This was agreed
upon. Some days later, in a squall,
the cry was heard: "A man overboard."
Avelun had disappeared, ine ex
captain jumped over the ship's side, but
he was a bad swimmer, and instead of
rescuing Avelan, he owed his life to
the latter. In due course the com
mander's report reached the czar, and
the ex-captain was restored to his rank.
The captain is now an admiral. The
other dav he celebrated the fiftieth an
niversary of his entrance into the
service by giving a dinner, to wlncli
Admiral Avelan was invited, and in
the course of an after-dimntr speech he
publicly thanked his junior colleague
for having opened to him the path of
honor. London News.
ON BUSY BROADWAY.
will never do to break established rules,
you know." Torre Ilauto Express.
She Knew What She Wanted. Old
Ladv "I'd like to buy some plasters,
young feller." Drug Clerk "Yes,
maam; porous?" uict daay '-uo you
s'pose I want to ketch my death o' cold
Let s soe your winter styles. ' juago.
Curicus "You've seen the new re
versible coat?" Quoricus "No, what is
.tlike?" Curicus "A combination over
joat and houso coat." Quoricus "Ah, 1
see. After you have worn it out you
wear it in!" Clothier and U'urnlsner.
"Susie," said Willie to his sister,
what are Blackfeet Indians?" "Whal
are what?" "Blackfeet Indians."
don't know, I'm sure," said Susie,
what tho expression can mean,
unless those wicked traders nave
been selling the poor Indians some ol
the hosiery that is warranted not tc
fade." Merchant Traveler.
Old Mrs. Smiley "Next time I gel
took down sick, my dear, I wish ye
wouldn't have that there young sprig of
a doctor come to attend me. I don't go
much on young doctors, no how." Mr
Smilev "Well, Maria, who would yov
like to havo me call?" Mrs. S. "I've
kinder took a notion to the doctoi
around the corner. I dunno much about
him, but I see he's got a sign out
'Vetorinary Surgeon,' and I think h
must be a man of experience." Amur
lea.
A Sn i . .
A negro w.ui m
ton until ink!!.:,,
for a nap in t'.i'i
was barefooted.
i ii'.-i, llclnij.
til- ;'i:i hoed cot
i iVa i;iy down
, -1 if a tree. She
l.-nly a tickling
T J':"- ' S.
the Queer and TI.no-Honored Institution
of a liuiieiiesc Town.
The little town of Stockach, in Baden,
which ha3 barely 2.000 inhabitants, en
joys the peculiar titloof "Doutschland's
Narren Residcnz" that is, the German
court (or capital) of fools, says Cassell's
Sa' irday Journal. The namo originated
in tho privilege accorded to the town by
letters patent, and exorcised for cent
uries, of holding annually at carnival
dine a public fool's assize, at which all
the follies committed by the people of
the town and vicinity wero mado known
and held up to public ridicule Accord
ing to local tradition Stockach was the
birthplaceof Hans Kuoni, jester to Leo
pold, tho brother of Albert the Wise,
Archduke of Austria. Just before the
batt.lo of Morgarton, in 1315, the man in
motley was tuked .to express his opinion
of the plans of the campaign, which had
been adopted in his presence. Hans
shook his cap and bells and answered:
"Your speeches please me little, my
masters, for you only think and debate
how you shall enter tho enemy"3 terri
tory, but take no thought how you shall
leave it." Tho batuo took place. jjeopuiu
forces were defeated aud escaped death
almost by a miracle. Then- the Arch
duke Albert, "because the- fool had
been wiser than his all brother coun
selors," gavo him the right "to sit in
iudgmont upon the wise" annually ia
his native town, aim pranteu many pn
ilogos and immunitios to this "fools'
court." This peculiar tribunal, which
met even in tho present century, was
composed of the -rather of fools" as
president, and an unlimited number of
"fool councilors"' as associates. The
members of t'.io court mot in January to
soloct tho cases to ho presented to the
oourtand to arrainre the programme for
the subsequent festival of fools. These
preliminary meetings took place in a
tavern called ths Fools' Inn and dis
tinguished by a special shield or taDiet
on the outer wall. n tho Sunday be
fore Shrove Sunday tho fools' clerks, in
fantastic irarb, drove through the town
in a carriage drawn by four horses at
tended by negro footmen and outriders,
and loudly notiflod'tho attentive, and la
many cases anxious, inhabitants, that
such and such cases would ho presented
to the court to he held on tho approach
ing Shrove Tuesday.
Shrove Sunday and Monday were
given over to ihe "young fools," or the
children, who marched through the
streets in fantastic dress, as they did,
and still do, in many other places.
Meanwhile a number of tho boys main
tained a sort of watch at the fools'
tree,' and, with ear-splitting noises and
blows of whips, drovo away allcomers
who were not fantastically attired. In
reward for this service each urchin re
ceived an immenso fools' cake. On the
eagerly-awaited Shrove Tuesday, at ten
o'clock in the morning, the members of.
the court assembled on a great platform
in the open air, and the judicial pro
ceedings were begun. The fools' prose
cutors made thoir satirical accusations,
and the persons convicted of folly, when
their crimes had been doscri bed, were
punished by having their names en
tered in tho book of fools. No one was
sensation in one of her big toes dis
turbed her slumber. She looked sleep
ily in that direction, and saw a sight
that made her teeth chatter. A huge
blacksnake had swallowed the toe, and
was acting as though he proposed to
swallow the rest of her. As she gazed
along the sleek back oi tne unduiuting , ones, without
serpent ne suemt-u oj iuhj, , jiotjnnti
was below the horizon. When she re-
An Xacidnt Not Often Reon on th. Streets
or Our UiE Cities.
Broadway was crowded with trucks
and pedestrians. It was shortly after
eight o'clock iu the morning and shop
keepers and clerks were hurrying to
their business.
Three li'Ale girls turned into Four
teenth street. They wore tho regula
tion checkered aprons so familiar to
the patrons of the big dry goods stores.
As they rounded tho corner u gust of
wind rudely lifted the hat of the small
est girl anil sent it sailing into the mid
dle of the street
"Oh, dear, there goes my hat," the
little one cried, as she stood wringing
her hands and making up her mind
what to do.
The next moment she had followed
it iftto the street. The hat was run
down by a cable car and the little girl
screamed.
Truck drivers pulled up their horses
as you rarely see them do in this big
city. Tho cable car stopped and the
gripman got off and himself rescued
the cheap sailor hat.
He handed ' it to the little girl in the
middle of the street, who carefully
wiped off the mud, and after doing this
joined her companions on the sidewalk.
Then traliic, which had been mo
mentarily stopped, was resumed.
Truck drivers shouted and swore, und
gripmen pounded their gongs on the
cable cars aifain, and the ole-erver
could hardly make up his mind wheth
er he had actually seen the incident or
imagined it.
covered from her temporary paralysis
she arose like a skyrocket fired slant
wise, and disappeared in the pine tim
ber with a blood-curdling shriek. After
being jerked through tho underbrush
or a few rods the snake lot go.
The ratlent Chinee.
A wonderful example of patience In
the Chinee is afforded by a consular re
port dealing with the manufacture oi
salt in central China. Holes about six
inches in diameter arc bored in the
rock by means of a primitive form of
iron drill, and sometimes a period oi
forty years elapses before the covered
brine is reached, so that the work is
carried on from one generation to an
other. During this time tho boring, at
may be Imagined, goes down to an im
mense depth. When brine is found it
is drawn up in buntbuo tuben by a rope
working over u liuffc lrr.n turned bj
bullocks. Tlie brine is ov::;vn-.;i -.".1 it
iron caldrons, the licit Ii'-i:.; ' :.; lier
by natural jssn, ivhHi ";!!.'
found in the vi iinily i t Lie salt wells.
A Conunoiliourf Cow.
An old brindlo cow belonging to v
Indiana man broke into another's field
and in court the oivn-'i' of the. field
proved that tlie cow (l:-;.t:-oyed the fill
ed prriei-ty, to-wit:
UI eY-riy trees, seven
,"ar trees, one plum
c I" ; d of cabbage,
- - i . ii .'.' r.,di-.long, one
;..i I
lowing merit!'!1:
Two foui'-yeiii'-n
apple trees, five
tree, one hum';'
twelve row:; i f Ii
row of beets one
fifty to one hii:,.'
tato plants, one
grapevines and
bushes.
b-il
folic
.,r
;lf roils long,
ly sw eet po
;;ii uis, three
blackberry
distinction of person, were pubiio
ly ridiculed and enrolled among the
fools. Protestations were of no
svail, and whoever ventured to criti
jiso the sentence of the court or
to spoak in favor of tho convicted fools
was declared to be a fool himself
and his name was put on the
roll. When all the cases had
been disposod of a procession, headed
by the council of fools, marched
t.hrnuirh the streets, pausing fre
quently, especially before the houses of
the convicted persons, to reau aiuuu iaa
sentence of the court to the great de
light of the populace. The sentence
was also affixed to tho doors of the crim
inals' houses. Tien beiran the festival
of fools, the programme of which in
cluded a lively theatrical representation
for tho populace, a banquot at the Fools'
Inn. and another banquet and dance in
the' evening. On tho next day, Ash
Wodnesday, at four o'clock in the after
noon, the council again assembled be
fore the Fools' Inn to bury their folly.
At the head of the procession came two
young folk bearing im-nense keys the
koys to the realm of folly. Next came
the fools' guard, carrying a parti-colored
and decorated staff, oft tho top of which
was tho bust of Hans Kuoni. He waa
followed by two fools' treasurers, who
bore an ancient carved chost containing
the books of fool and the records of the
court. Then came the latner or ioois,
usually the oldest male inhabitant of
the town. The rest of the fools fol
lowed, walking two and two, with bowed
heads and in silence, like attendants at
a tana. al. When the procession had
reached the fools' tree it marched around
it three times and then dispersed, and
tbe reign of follv was over for that vear.
Awarded Highest Honors, World's Fair.
The only Pure Cream of Tartar Powder. No Ammonia, No Alum.
Used in Millions of Homes 40 Years the Standard
f r tt