il'I'MR GAZETTE.
OFFICIAL
HEPPNER GAZETTE.
PAPER
NOTHING RISKED,
NOTHING MADE.
IN"0 RISK,
TEADE.
The man who advertises, k,.h the cash
Notice it.
The man ho doesn't advertise, doera't
get the cash.
-t r v V 'A."
.10 JP 111 W um.
ELEVENTH YEAR
Mi M I vV E E K L Y GAZETTE.
Tuesdays and Fridays
BY
THE PATTERSON PUBLISHING COMPANY.
AIVAH W.PATTERSON Bus. Malinger.
I 'TIH PATTMtSON Editor
V ?2.5i) por year, $1,85 fur six months, 75cts.
l..r three niomns.
Advertising Rates Made Known on
Application.
'l lio " E.A.3-XjB, " of Long Creek, Grant
County, Oregon, is published by the name com
pany every Friday morning. Subscription
price, f'Jper year. Koradvertisiiig rates, address
OE1IIT Xi. PAITBasoiT, Editor and
Manager, Long Creek, Oregon, or "Uazette,"
leppner, Oregon.
'plIIH PAPKHiskept on tile at E. 0. Oake's
1 Advertising Agency, tf4 and 65 iYlerchants
Kcliiijigs, Han 1 ranuisoo, California, where cou
racts tor advertising can be made for it.
THE GAZETTE'S AU'iNTS.
Wnguer B. A. Hnnsaker
Arlington, Thill Heppner
Lons Creek, The Eagle
kelio Postmaster
Camas Prairie Oscar De Vaul
Nye, Or H. C. Wright
Uurdiuau, Or Postmaster
ilainllton, Grant Co., Or., Postmaster
lone T. J. Carl
Prairie City, Or R. R. Mclialey
Canyon City, Or., S. L. Parrish
Pilot Rock, G. P, Bkeltou
Uiiyville, Or., J. E. Snow
John Day, Or.,....'. P. I. MeCiilliira
Athena, Or John Kdington
Pendleton, Or., Postmaster
Mount Vernon, G rant Co., Or., Postmaster
Shelby, Or., Miss Stella Flett
Pox, Grant Co., Or J. V. Allen
Eight Wile, Or Mrs. Andrew Ashbaugh
Upper Riiea Creek, B. F. Hevland
Douglas, Or Postmaster
Lone Kock, Or R. M. Johnson
Gooseberry J. R. Esteb
London, Oregon Herbert Halstead
Lexington .Jas. Leach
AN AOKNT WAKTJiO IN EVERY PKE0INCT.
Umon Pacfig Railway-Local card.
No. 10, mixed leares Heppner 6:00 a. m.
' 10, " ar. at Arlington a.m.
9, ' leaves " p. ra.
" U, " ar. at Heppner 12:35 p. ra, daily
oxoept Sunday.
EfiBt bonnd, main line sr. at Arlington a. m.
West " ' " leaveb " a, m.
Day trains have been discontinued.
DIBECTORJ.
United States Officials.
I'l t dident , . . . G rover Cleveland
V i oe-i'raalden t Ad i ai Bt oveneon
Wfo-elury of State. ..... Waiter Q. Gresham
btcrotary of Treasury John (i. Carlisle
Secj alary of interior Hoke Smith
Secretary of War Daniel S. Laniont
Secretary of Nuvy Hilary A. Herbert
Post master-General Wilson S. Bissell
Attorney-General Richard 8. Olney
Secretary of Agriculture J. Sterling Morton
State of Oregon.
Governor S. Pennoyor
Secretary of State G, W. McBride
TreitHuror Phil. Metschan
Supt. Public Instruction E, B, MoElroy
Honfirnm J J' H Mitchell
( Binger Hermann
(onKresemen J w fi mi(
Punter Frank (J. Baker
!F. A. Hoore
W. P. Lord
K. S. Bean
Seventh Judicial District.
Cuoait Judge W. h, Bradnhavy
iVoH.jcutiug AtLorney W. H, Wilson
Morrow County Officials.
it. hi i Senator Henry Blackman
tlopryHHUtative J. IS. Brown
' ounty Judge Juliue Keithly
' Gommieeioners Geo. W, Vincont
J.M.Baker. j
Clerk J. W. Morrow !
Sheriff Geo. Noble. !
Treasurer W. J. Leezer .
AssGBBor H, L. Shaw
" Surveyor Isa Brown
school Sup't W.L.Snlinjf
" ( 'oroner T. W. Ayers, J r
HEPPNER TOWN OFFICERS,
ftayoi J. R. Simons
Council men O. K. FarnBworth,
Ijiclitenthal, OtiB Patterson, Julius Keithly,
W. A. Johnston, J. L. Yeager.
Recorder A. A. Roberta.
Treasurer E. G. Slocum
Marshal J. W. Hasmua.
Precinct Offlcerp.
Juatico of the Peace F. J. Uallock
Constable C. W.ltyohard
United States Land Officers.
THE DALLES, OB.
J. W. LewiB Ki'giater
T. 8. Lang Receiver
LA GRANDE, OR.
B.F, Wilson Rogiater
J.H. Kobbins..... Receiver
SECEET SOCIETIES.
Doric Lodge No. 20 K. of P. meets ev
ery Tuesday evening at 7.80 o'clock in
their Castle HaU, National Bank build
ing. Sojourning brothers cordially in
vited to attend. W. L. Salimo, C. U.
W. B Potteb, K. of K. 4 S. tf
KAWLIN8 POST, NO. 81.
G. A. B.
SHets at Lexington, Or., the last Saturday of
each month. AU veteranB are invited to join.
1 '. C. Hoon, Geo. VV. Smith.
Adjutant, tf Commander.
FBOFi:SSI01T.xi.
A A. EOBERT8, Eeal Estate, Insnr
anoe and Collections. OlBoe in
3ounoil Chambers, Heppner, Or. swtf.
S. P. FLORENCE,
STOCKRAISER
HEPPNEK. OllEGON.
: Cattle branded and ear marked as shown above,
Horses F on right shoulder.
Mr cattle range in Morrow and Umatilla coun
ties. 1 wiU pay $100.00 for the arrest and oon
riction of any person stealiag my stock.
A Year's Subscription to a Pop
ular Agricultural Paper
GIVEN FREE TO OURRKADERS
a special arrangement with the
publishers we are prepared to furnish
FREE to each of our readers a year's
subscription to the popular monthly
agricultural journal, the Amebican
Fahmeb, published at Springfield and
Cleveland, Ohio.
This offer is made to any of our sub
scribers who will pay up all arrearages
on subscription and one year in advanoe,
and to any new subscribers who will pay
one year in advance. The American
B'ahmkp. eujoys a large national oiroula-
tion, ami rant's among the leading
agricultural papers. By this arrange
ment it COSTS YOU NOTHING to re
oeive the American Farmer for one
year, It will be to your advantage to
oail promptly. Sample copies can be
seen at our office.
The Original
Webster's Unabridget
DIGTIOHHBY.
SPECIAL AKKAlNtlEMENi' WITH THR
publishers. v e are able to obtain a number
ol tp" above book, ana
propose to furnish
copy to each or our subscribers.
loers.
riessitv
i he aictlonary is a necessity in every home.
school and business house. It nils a vacancy.
and furnishes knowledge which no one nun
dred other volumes of the choicest books could
supply. Young and old, educated and ignorant,
rich and poor, should have it within reach, and
refer to its contenls every day in the year.
As some have asked if this is really the Orig
inal Webster'B Unabridged Dictionary, we are
able to state we have learned direct from the
publishers the fact, that tills is the very work
couiDlete on which about forty of the best years
of the author's life were so well employed in
writing. It contains the entire vocabulary of
about 100,000 words, including the correct spell
ing, derivation and definition of same, and is
tne regular standard size, containing about
300,000 square inches of printed surface, and la
oouna in ciotn nan morocco ana sheen.
Until turther notice we will furnish this
valuable Dictionary
First To any new subscriber.
Second To any renewal subscriber.
Third To any subscriber now in arrears
who pays up and one year in advance, at
the following prices, viz:
hull Cloth bound, gilt side and back
stamps, marbled edges, $i-oo.
nan Morocco, Douna, gilt side and back
stamps, marbled edges, $i .50.
hull bheep bound, leather label, marb ed
edges, $2.00.
hitty cents added in all cases for express
age to Heppner.
r-As the publishers limit the time and
number of books they will furnish at the low
prices, we advise all who desire to avail them-
selves of this great opportunity to attend to it
at once.
SILVJER'S CHA.MPION
tai
if.
THE DAILY-BY MAIL.
Subscription price reduced as follows:
One Year (by mail) : : $6 00
Six Months " : ; 3 00
Three Months " 1 50
One Month " : : . 50
THE WEEKLY BY" MAIL.
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The News is the only consistent caampion of
silver in the West, and should be in every home
in the West, and in the hands of every miner
and business man In Colorado.
Send in your subscriptions at once.
Address,
3Doi3L-7"ox". Colo.
LUMBER!
TTTE HAVE FOR SALE ALL KINDS OF UN
TT dressed Lumber, 16 mileB of Heppner, at
what is known as the
SCOTT S.A.-W3VIIXjIj.
PER 1,000 FEET, ROUGH,
" " " CLEAR,
- 11000
- 17 60
rF DELIVERED IN HEPPNER, WILL ADD
L tft.DO per 1,000 feet, additional.
L. HAMILTON, Prop.
Hamlltorii ManEr
D. A
WISCONSIN CENTRAL LINES
(Northern Pacific R. R. Co., Lessee.)
LATEST TIME CARD
Two Through Trains Daily.
12 4ripm'6.2rinmlLv.MlnneapoliArl8.40aml4.2npm
lVuml7.1iipmLv...St. Paul. ..Ar8.iXlam3.40pra
1 il.'ipmlLv.-..Duluth . ,Ar11.10" I
l7.0"pmLv.. Ashland.. ArlH.lSam
7.15am lO.SamlAr... Chicago.. .Lv5.lK)p" 10.40"
I I I I
Tickets sold and baeeage checked through to
all points in the United Ktotes and Canada.
Close connection made in Chicago with all
traius tloing East and South.
For full information apply to yoiir nearest
tieket agent or JAS. C. POND,
Gen. Pass, and Tkt Agt,, Milwaukee, Wis,
.-- yslj''''"r,'h'"1
Mr "
1)
HEPPNER, MORROW COUNTY, OREGON, FRIDAY. DECEMBER
"As old as
thehills"and
never excell
ed. "Tried
and proven"
is the verdict
0 f millions.
o 1 m m 0 n s
Liver Eegu
TT , . lator is the
-tOC and Kidney
medicine to
which you
can pin your
faith for a
cure. A
mild laxa
tive, and
purely veg
etable, act
ing directly
on the Liver
and Kid
Pills
neys. Try it.
Sold by all
Druggists in Liquid, or in Powder
to be taken dry or made into a tea.
The King of Liver Medicines.
"I have used yourHimmons Liver Regu
lator mid can eouscienciously say It is the
king of all liver medicines, I consider it a
medicine chest In lmelf. Oko. W. Jack
son, Tacoma, Washington.
-EVERY PACKAGE'S
Has the Z Stamp in red on wrapper
CJCTIOIC TIME !
TO
San Franolsoo
And all points in California, via the Mt, Hhasta
route of the
Southern Pacific Co.
The great highway through California to all
points hast and South. Grand Uoenio Route
of the Paoifio Coast. Pullman Buffet
Sleepers. Second-clasa Sleepers
Attaehedtto express trains, affording superior
aocommodatlonB for second-class passengers.
For rates, tickets, sleeping oar reservations,
eto call npon or address
8. KOEHLER, Manager, E. P. ROGERS, Asst.
Gen. F. & P. Agt,, Portland, Oregon.
National Bag ol Heppner.
WM.
PENLAND, ED.
President.
E. BISHOP,
. Cashier.
TRANSACTS A GENERAL BANKING BUSINESS
COLLECTIONS
Made on Favorable Terms.
EXCHANGE BOUGHT & SOLD
HEPPNER. tf OREGON
Free Medicine !
A Golden Opportunity for Suffering
Humanity.
Physician Give their Remedies to the People
DO YOU SIlFFERtSJpW.";
will Bend vou FREE OF CHARGE a full course
of specially prepared remedies best suited to
your case. We want your recommendation.
We can cure the most aggravated diseases of
both sexes. Our treatment for all diseases and
deformities are modern and scientific, acquired
by many year's experience, which enables ub to
Guarantee a Cure. Do not despair.
N. B. We have the only positive cure for Ep
ilepsy (fits) and Catarrh. References given.
Permanently located. Old established.
Dr. Williams Mrdical and Surgical Insti
tute, 719 Market Street, San Francisco, Cal.
ARE VOU ANY GOOD AT PUZZLES ?
The genius who invented the "Fifteen" puz
zle, "Pigs In Clover," and many others, has in
vented a brand new one, which Is going to be
the greatest on record. There is fun, instruc
tion and entertainment in it. The old and
Learned will find as much mystery in it as the
young and unsophisticated. This great puzzle
s the property of the New York Press Club, for
whom it was invented by Samuel Loyd, the
great puzzleist, to be Bold for the benefit of the
movement to erect a great home for newspaper
workers in New York. Generous frlendB have
given $'25,000 in ptizeB for the successful puzzle
solvers. TEN CENTS Bent to the "Press Club
Building and Chrrity Fund," Temple Court,
New York City, will set you the mystery by
return mail.
DID YOU TRY
"PIGS IN CLOVER"
or the "FIFTFEN PUZZLE."
Well, the man who Invented them has just
completed another little playful myBtery for
young and old, which li selling for TEN CENTS
for the benefit of the fund to erect a home for
newspaper workers in New York. This puzzle
is the property of the New York Press Club
and generous frlendB of the club have donated
over $25,000 to provide prizes for lucky people,
young or old, who solve the mystery. There is
a lot of entertainment and instruction in it.
Send a dime and get the souvenir puzzle by
return mall. Address "Press Club Souvenir,"
jemple Court.New York City.
' oca parcels or mail" ran
m,j , FOR 10 1-CEHT ITAMPS
tii I Uri-viiiii.r 11 rut 'JItr..) vnur nil.
dress if received witnin :n
will tt lor 1 year ttowty
or in ted on ku mined
hibela. Only Directory
guaranteeing 125,000
cuHtomers ; from pub
lishers and manufac
turers you II rw'filvtt
probably, tbounanin ol
valuable hooks, papery
rutin pi eH.magazl iin,eU:.
All free and each puree-
with one ofyuurprinted addrewi label;
punted thereon. KXTKA ! We wll
also print and prepay pobUMfe on !M) oj
your label uddreaKeti to you; which
mirk on votir envelopes, books, etc., U
WplX prevent thWr bing lout. J. A. akk
!! A Ji lKrf Hlriville. N. C write : From
rv v , 2 J my SB cent add res in your Llgbtnmi
rWP$r DOwfirv r-e received my sou addles
1Kb"! win i
over 300U ! u 01
U '- a:noiiK publishers d nianufiuiurHM
4 .11- of uiali from all !rt tf tiie World.'
WOKLDS FAIR DIRECTORY CO.,
No. 147 Frankford and Girard Avea. Philadel
phia, Pa.
MB
"" V 1 1 . . .
PRIZES ON PATENTS.
How to Get Twenty-five Hundred
Dollars for Nothing,
The Winner hai a clear Gift of a Small
Fortune, and the Loser Have Patents
that may Bring them in Still More,
Would you like to make tweuty-five hundred
dollars? If you would, read carefully what
follows and you may see a way to do It.
The Press Claims Company devotes much
attention to patents. It has handled thousands
of applications for inventions, but it would
like to handle thousands more. There is plenty
of inventive tallent at large in this country
needing nothing but encouragement to produce
practical results. That encouragemcntthe Press
Claims Compauy propose to give.
NOT SO HARD AS IT SEEMS.
A patent strikes most people as an appalling
ly formidable thing. The idea is that an in
ventor must be a natural genius, like Edison or
Bell; that he muBt devote years to delving in
complicated mechanical problems and that he
must spend a fortune on delicate experiments
before he can get a new device to a patentable
degree of perfection. This delusion the com
pany desires to dispel. It desires to get into
the head of the public a clear comprehension
of the fact that it is not the great, complex, and
expensive inventions that bring the best returns
to their authors, but the little, simple, and
cheap ones the things that seem so absurdly
trivial that the average citizen would feel
somewhat ashamed of bringing them to the
attention of the Patent Olllce.
Edison says that the profits he has received
from the patents on all his marvelous Inven
tions ave not been sufficient to pay tne cost
of his experiments. But the man who con
ceived the idea of fastening a bit of rubber
cord to a child's ball, so that it would come
back to the baud when thrown, made a fortune
out of his scheme. The modem sewing-machine
is a miracle of ingenuity the product
a hundred and fifty years, but the whole bril
liant result rests upon the simple device of
putting the eye of the needle at the point in
stead of at the other end.
of the toil of hundreds of busy brains through
THE LI TTLE THINGS THE ItlONT
VALUABLE.
Comparatively few people regard themselves
as Inventors, but almost every body has been
struck, atone time or another, with ideas that
seem calculated to reduce some of the little
frictions of life. Usually such ideas are dis
missed without further thought.
"Why don't the railroad compauy make its car
windows so that they can be slid up and down
without breaking the passengers' back?" ex
claims the traveler. "If I were running the
road I would make them in such a way."
"What was the man who made the saucepan
thinking of?" grumbles the cook. "He never
had to work over a stove, or he would have
known how it ought to have beep fixed."
"Hang such a collar button 1" growls aman
who is latejfor breakfast. "If I were in the
business I'd make buttons that wouldn't' slip
out, or break off, or gouge out the back of my
neck
And the various sufferers forgot about their
grievances and began to think of something
else. If they would set down the next con
venient opportunity, put their Ideas about car
windows, saucepans and collar buttons into
practical shape, and then apply for patents
they might find themselves as independently
wealthy ai the man who invented the Iron
umbrella ring, or the one who patented
he fifteen puzzle.
A TEMPTING OFFER.
To Induce the people to keep trackof their
bright ideas and see what there In them, the
Press Claims Company has resolved to oll'er a
prize.
To the pemon who submit, to It
the simplest and most promising
invention, from a. couimcrciul
point of view, the company will
Blve tweuty-five hundred dollars
in cash, in addition to refunding
the fees for securing a patent.
It will also advertise the inveu.
tion free of charge.
This oll'er is subject to the following condi
tions:
Every competitor must obtain a patent for
his Invention through the company. He must
Brstapply for a preliminary search, the cost of
which will bo live dollars. Should this
seach show his invention to be unpatentable,
he cau withdraw without further expense.
Otherwise he will be expected to complete his
application and take out a patent in the regu
lar way. The total expense, Including the
Government and Bureau fees, will be seventy
dollars. For this, whether he secures a prize
or not, the inventor will have a patent that
ought to be a valuable property to him. The
prize will be awarded by a jury consisting of
three reputable patent attorneys of Wasbihg
ton. Intended competitors should fill out the
following blank, and forward it with their
pplication:
" , , 18U3.
"I submit the within described Invention iu
competition for the Twenty-live hundred Dollar
Prize offered by the Press Claims Compauy."
NO HLANKS IN THIN t'O.M IT.TION.
This is a competition of rather an uuusul na
ture. It is common to offer prizes for tho best
story, or picture, or architectural plan, all the
competitors risking the loss of their labor and
the successful one merely selling his for the
amoun of the prize. But the Press Claims
Company's offer is something entirely differ
ent. Each person is asked merely to help him
self, andrbe one who helps him self to the
best advantage is to be rewarded by doiu It.
The prize is only a stimulus to do something
that would be well worth doing without it,
The architect whose competitive plau fur a
club house on a certain corner is not occept
ed has spent his labor on something of very
ittle use to him. But the person who patents a
simple and useful device in the Press Claims
Company's competition, need not worry If he
fail to secure a prize. He has a substantial
result to show lor ms wora one that wll
command its value in the marke at any
time.
The man who uses auv article In his dullv
work ought to know better now to improve it
than the mechanical exnert who kIuHI,.. it
only from the theoretical point of view. Get
rid of the idea that an improvement can be too
simple to be worth patenting. The slmplerlhe
better. The person who best nui::.f,H In
combining simplicity and popularity, will get
Awarded Highebt Honors, World's Fair.
R
yrm
mi
ine only Pure (.ream of Tartar Powder. No Ammonia; No Alum.
Used in Millions of Homes 40 Years the Standard
the Press Claims Company's tweuty-flvo hun
dred dollars.
The responsibility of this company may be
judged from the fact that its stock is' hold bv
about three hundred of the leadisg newspapers
of the United States.
Address the Press Claims Company, Johm
Woddcrburn, managing attorney, 018 F street
N. W Washington, D. C.
i. A. It NOTICE.
We take ttiis opportunity of informing
our subscribers tbst the new commis
sioner of pensions has been apDointed
He is an old soldier, and we believe
that soldiers and their heirs will re
oeive justice at his hands. We do not
anticipate that there will be any radios
changes in the administration of pensioa
affairs under the new regime.
We would advise, however, that TJ. 8,
soldiers, sailors and their heirs, take
steps to make application Bt onoe, if
they have not already done so, in order
to secure the benefit of the early filing
of their claims in case there should be
any future pension legislation. Suoh
legislation is seldom retroaotive. There
fore it is of great importance that ap
plications be filed in the department at
the earliest possible date.
If the U. S. soldiers, sailors, or their
widows, ohildren or parents desire in
formation in regard to pension matters,
they should write to the Press Claims
Company, at Washington, D. 0., and
they will prepare and send the neoesaary
application, if they find them entitled
under the numerous laws enacted for
their benefit. Address
PKESS CLAIMS COMPANY,
John Weddidbbubn, Managing Attor
ney, Washington, D. O., P. O. Box 385
tf.
THE WESTERN PKDAGOUUK.
We are in reoeipt of the May number
of our state school paper. It exoeed
any of the former numbers it value.
The paper this month oontains many
new and valuable features. The illus
trated series on the schools of the state
is introduced by a paper on the Friends
Polyteoliuic Institute at Salem, Oregon.
These papers cannot fail to be of great
value both to the sohools au to the
public
There are also several fine articles
by our best writers and the departments
"Current EventB,""Saturday Thoughts,"
"Educational News" "The Oracle
AtiBwers, Correspondents," etc., each
oontain much valuable reading for
teachers or parents. The magazine
has about 50 pages of matter, well
printed and arranged. We pronounce
the Western Pedagogue the best educa
tional monthly on the ooast.
Everyone of our readers should have
the paper if tbey are at all interested
in education. No teaoher school direo
tor or student can get along well with
out it. We will receive subscriptions
at this office. Price only $1.00 a year.
When desired we will send the WeBtern
Pedagogue and Gazette one year to one
address for $3.00. Call and examine
sample oopies. Teaohers, directors and
parents, now is the time to subscribe, tf
Bncklen's Arnica Salve.
The beBt salve in the .world for cuts
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rhenm, fever
sores, tettor, chapped hands, chilblains
oorns and all skin eruptions, and posi
tively cures piles, or no pay required. It
is guaranteed to give perleot satisfaction
or money refunded. Pnoe 25 cents per
box. For sale by Sloonm-Jobnson Drug
Company.
A SONCTOF THE ROAD.
Come, comrades, since the way is long I
Let's 'liven it by tune and song,
And greeting give to all we pass;
To whlte-of-head, to light-of-head.
To matron grave and laughing lass.
Hurrah for lane and by-way,
For distant path and nigh way,
For friends we greet, for foes we meet,
Along the world'sbroad hlgnwayl
'Tls morning-break: lithe limbs are strong;
Who dreams of crime and guilt and wrongf
Yon youngling and his violet eyes?
Nay, light-of-mind and love-so-blind
Are wisdom-proof and folly wise.
Hurrah for lane and by-way,
. For distant path and nigh way,
For friends we greet, for foes we meet,
Along tho world's broad highway I
'Tls noontide: lotus spend an hour
Dream drinking ere wo lose the power,
And all our pleasure disappears,
Since slight-of-heart and blight-of-heart
Have swdrn the goolet smacks of tears
Hurrah for lano and by-way.
For distant path and nigh way,
For friends we greet, for foes we meet
Along the world's broad highwayl
T s night and low: fuul thieves have mobbed
The wealt ones hero and left tliem robbed
Of hope, and faith, and love, and rest;
But sure-of-soul and pure-of-soui
Still fold thor treasuries to their breast.
Hurrah for lane and by-wuy.
Fordistarit path and nigh way,
For every one whose journey's done,
Who's gained tho distant sky-wayl
Julie M. L ppmann, In Century,
Land Fok Sale. 480 aores over in
Wilson tirairie. A good stock ranch aud
will be sold cheap. Call at Gazette
office for particulars and terms. tf.
Better subscribe for the Gnzet and
get ready for the loug wiuter evenings.
aking
owder
8, 1893.
Highest of all in Leavening
ABSOLUTELY PURE
A MILLION ADRIFT.
Tho Strango Story of a Mississippi
IVver Flood.
How n I'o .r I'rei.':, Settler Became a
Hilll.i.iiiiv, for Tivo Hours aud
Without Ue'njr Aware
of It.
In tho south end of the city, commcra
ly culled t'nrondelet, but which at one
time bcire t'.ie very significant name of
Vide 1'oelie (empty pocket), there re
sides one of the early French settlers,
Joe Marshall by linme, says the St.
Louis Republic. "Old Joe," as he is
called by everyone, is one of those un
fortunate Frenchmen who settled in
Carondelet while it was yet a burg of
some six or seven houses. He acquired
a great deal of property, as did all the
old Creoles, and when a more active
civilization encroached unon the dis
trict and the property began to be
worth something, he lost it all through
carelessness and bad management. It
may not be generally known that Joe
was a millionaire for two whole hours
at one time, and the cireumstaneeK of
his rise and fall are best told in his own
words:
"It was in the summer of 18401 was
on the river then. The river was boom
ing and it was unsafe to go out in a
small boat. That was in the earlv
steamboat times when everyone trav
eled by river, and the wharf in St.
Louis was lined with boats which stuck
their bows so close together in order
to get to the wharf at all, that they
formed a wall along' the river front,
and when a fire broke out on one boai
the others were so tightly wedged in
that escaps was impossible. It had
been storming all day, and in the even
ing the river was a raging torrent,
ready to tear away its banks or to dash
the huge trees that had beer; uprooted
by it in its mad course through the hull
of the steamer that ventured from the
bank out into mid-stream.
"About nine o'clock that evening a
fire broke out on the levee among the
boats. There was a panic. Some of
the passengers who were spending the
night on the boats in order to make
sure of their staterooms lost their lives
in the panic which followed, and others
left their valuables. The loss was im
mense, both of life and of property.
The red glare of the fire was distinctly
visible in Vide I'oche, and I and my
partner sat up and kept watch on the
river, expecting to see some of the pas
sengers of the burning boats drift by,
and to rescue them if possible. We
waited long, but no victims of the fire
oame. At last as we were about to give
up the watch, we saw out in the cur
rent a dark object that appeared to be
a raft. It shot swiftly into view, and
as it passed us, we could see the white
face of a man holding on to a raft
which he had constructed of four life
preservers, and on which he floated a
large chest, which, from the care he
had taken to place it in safety at the
risk of his own life, we judged to be
very valuable. We resolved to save
him if possible, and, jumping into our
skiff, we pulled toward him. At that
time the raft was caught in one of the
whirlpools below the Elwood street
dike and was broken to pieces. The
man lost his hold and was swallowed in
the vortex, while the chest, too, went
down. We rowed about the Bpot to
pick up the life preservers, which had
been separated, and in picking up the
second one found a rope attached to it.
My partner wanted to cut it, but I
stopped him and told him to save the
rope, as it might be useful. lie com
menced pulling it in, but before he had
gotten much of it in the boat he called
me to his assistance, and we worked
away pulling in the dead weight at the
other end of the rope. . .. ,
"Finally the task was finished, and,
as a reward, instead of the body of the
man whom we had just seen drown be
fore our eyes, we found the chest
which be valued more than his life. We
hauled it ashore with many misgivings,
and I did not open it, but put it care
lessly before my shanty.
"The next day I had plenty to do
picking up wreckage and watching for
the bodies of those who had perished on
the boats. About five o'clock in the
evening a gentleman drove down to the
hanty. He seemed greatly excited.
He was accompanied by a constable.
They asked me if 1 had seen a chest
floating down the river. Well, to make
a long story short, ther man was the
owner of the chest, which contained his
whole fortune more than a million.
The man who was drowned was his
brother, who had locked him in his
stateroom to perish and tried to make
jff with the treasure in the way de
scribed. "I told him of his brother's death, and
he remarked: Toor fellow, I forgive
him and shall not tell father of his at
tempted crime' lie was a member of
me of the best families of the citv at
the. time, and after taking me to the
nearest saloon, where we had the best
in the house, he gave me five thonsnnd
dollars to keep the whole affair ciuiet
and not let his name be known. What
;lid I do with the live thousand dollars?
I lived like a gentleman ou it for a
year.
"Did I ever see the gentleman again?
Ves, finite of,i. lie is one of the lead
ing men of M. Louis to-day.''
I HuliKiiv, .'
j The nerviest in;
urnni'i1.
America has
been discovered. II
is a tramp, and
wlu'ii lust Hcea wan lisiiimirin
WEEKLY rIO. 661.
SEMI-WEEKLY DiO. lJO.l
Power. Latest U. S. Gov't Report
xromia a corner in Topeka, Kan., one
day lately. He had entered a restau
rant and had ordered an elaborate meal.
After eating it with great relish he took
his check, walked to the cashier's desk
and coolly informed him that he had
no money. The cashier put his hand to
a shelf under the desk, produced a
pistol and ordered the man to pay.
"What's that'.''' the tramp asked, point
ing to the pistol. "That, sir," answered
the other, -is a revolver." An expres
sion of relief euine over the man's face
is he replied: "Oh. I don't care a straw
tor a revolver: I thought it was a stom
vch pump, flood ;.rternoon." And he
walked out, !vf ire i n- a stonished cash
r could rally from his surm-iso.
POOR HOTEL-KEEPING.
he Noble Work lone by a Reformer In
a, Coon-Skin Cap.
One night a year ago, writes a New
York Sun correspondent, there were half
a dozen of us to go up to the village ho
tel in the rickety old bus, and among
the crowd was a solemn-looking old
chap, dressed in very plain goods and
wearing a coon-skin cap. It was the
typical village hotel landlord in the
bar-room, a very fresh young man be
hind the register, mighty little for sup
per, and that poorly cooked, and there
was more or less growling. The man
with the coon-skin oap was treated very
brusquely by the clerk, and the frowsy
headed waiter girl didn't seem to care
whether he had any thing to eat or not.
He didn't say much, but It was evident
that he was mad. ' .
After supper tbe landlord and "Coon
skin" had a private confab. When it was
ended the old man came down-stairs,
opened the front door, and then turned
to the clerk, and said: ,
"You git!"
"What do you mean?"
"I have rented this hotel. Sklpl's
The clerk put on his coat and hat and
walked out. Then "Coon-skin'' gent ,
word to the cook and waiter girl to be
out in half an hour, for the hostler to
be gone by midnight, and for the bar
keeper to vacate by noon the next day.
He kindly allowed us to stop over night,
but we had to get our breakfast at a
bakery. By noon the doors of the hotel
were nailed up, signs of "closed" posted,
and as we footed it down to the depot
tne solemn oiu maj tyjawea out suffi
ciently to observe: ' -.mmt
"I'm after seven more of 'em along this
line of railroad, and if I can shut 'em up
the public will be in my debt. I have
figured it out to my entire satisfaction,
and I truly believe that three-fifths of
the crime in this country is incited bj
Door botel-koeping."
("HE MALE FLIRT,
Who la the More Detestable In a Woin
4 - ''-' an's Estimation?
' One can not pass through a flirtation
man or woman without lowering
the tone of one's mind, writes Felicia
iiolt in the Ladies' Home Journal. I
know that I seem to thus put mind be
fore the affections; but in the prosaic
nineteenth century hearts seem out of
fashion. Cupid has taken a holiday and
left us to our own devices; he loves an
age when pounds and pence play a less
conspicuous part, for love laughs at cal
culation. So our mental development
becomes our highest consideration, and
it must suffer in a game where only the
sly trickster holds the trump card.
Dignity and trifling put each other
out of countenance, as does the bishop
and the clown; and when a man and
woman enter with deliberation into the
unworthy joust of tilting one's attrac
tions against the other with no other
oim than the gratification of his or her
vanity, then, I say, neither party can
come out unscathed, either mentally or
morally.
If one is more detestable than the
other, it is the male flirt; for since cus
tom has given him the power of making
the advance, he can do tho most harm,
particularly should he practice hip
cruel arts upon an unsophisticated girl;
he may fall a victim to his cruelty.
A man may recover from a bitter en
counter of this sort a sadder and a wiser
man; his trust in woman may be terri
bly shaken, but he does not succumb,
as does the woman, whose heart, once
wiled from her keeping, grows weary
of the world.
And, incredible as it may seem, women
are quite as much to blame as men for
the sin of flirtation. For if they con
demn the sin, they invariably smile upon
the sinner, specially if he is handsome
and attractive.
Three Notable Families,
This county contains three remark
able families, writes a Milan (Tenn.)
correspondent. It is perhaps safe to
say that it contains the tallest, the
heaviest and the lightest families in the
country. The tall family consists of
four persons father, mother, sou and
daughter. The tallest member, the son,
measures 6 feet 8 inches; the shortest,
the mother, 8 feet a inches. The heavy
family is composed of father, mother
and daughter, and their united weight
is over 900 pounds. The light family
number ten persons, father, mother and
eight children, whose united weight ii
' pounds.
- Bow the Duohess Managed It.
The orthography of our great-grandmothers
was uncertain. The old
Duchess of Gordon usod to say to her
cronies: "You know, my dear, when I
don't know how to spell a word I always
Jraw a line under it; and if it is spelled
wrong it passes for a very good joke,
and " 11 ls sP"ed right it don't mat-
lewder
' mr1-