The Oregon scout. (Union, Union County, Or.) 188?-1918, July 23, 1887, Image 6

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    V
!
OREGON SCOUT.
JONES & CHANCEY, Publiihers.
vmon, okk;ox.
PITH AND POINT.
An exchange refers to "the hldilon
diamond." It evidently is not the
hotel clerk's diamond.
It is tho joyous heart that furnishes
tho sunshino on life's highway. IWiile
hall Times.
Nover look a gift horso in tho
mouth, and never inspect tho heels of a
mulo of any description. Merchant
Traveler.
Tho love of truth is laudable, but
vro must bo careful not to mistake for
it tho love of our own opinion. United
rrcsbytcrian.
The man who thinks ho never did
a foolish thing isn't wiso enough to
know what folly is. Boston Journal of
Education.
Qnecn Victoria nttonded a circus
tho other day for tho firsttimo in thirty
years. Yetslio easily recognized tho
jokes of tho clown as old acquaints
an ccs.
Omaha Dame And fo, my daugh
ter, you nro engaged to Mr. Do Goodc.
I am delighted. Ho comes of a splen
did family. Charming Daughter
Yes, ho proposed lust night and I ac
cepted. "Do you lovo him?" "No,
'but that horrid Miss Tort does."
Omaha World.
"Did you sco that woman in Bcn
hanan's pow this morning witli all
her mind centered on her now bon
nctP" nsked tho deacon. "No, dear,"
replied his wife, sweotly, "I was too
much taken up admiring tho man in
Sliolah's pow witli his whole soul
fixed on his new glovo3." Then tho
deacon tried to talk about tho sor
raon. Bunlcttc.
A little boy wanted to stay at homo
from school, and know his mother
wouldn't let him unless ho was sick.
So lils mothor said: "Why, my littlo
man, aro you sick this morning?" Tho
littlo man not knowing a whole vo
cabulary of ailments to solcct from, on
tho spur of tho momont, said: "Yes,
ma'am; my teetli itch."
"lleon North, I understand," said
Jones to Brown, who had gono to Now
Hampshire to spongo on somo of his
rich kin. "Yes, I was up nmong my
relatives." "How did thoy treat you?"
"Oh, immonsol Nothing was good
onough for me. and" dropping ids
voice "that's just what thoy gavo
mo." Washington Critic
Wrong Side Up.
rromlBO mo Bomothing over so nlco,
When your ihlp comes In, snlil sho.
I would promise a dozen things In a trlco,
Oh, littlo lnss on my Itneol
Hut ships of mlno for many n yonr
IIovo been worso than nn empty cupj
And tho noxt to nrrlvo, Uko tho rest, I foar,
Will ho washed In bottom up.
Hunter MacCulloch.
Said Miss Spinster (no longer
youthful), wlion sho hoard that her
friend, MIrs Marriwcll, was going to
wed: "Woll, lot tho90 marry who
wish; but, for my part, I novor yot saw
a man I could caro onough for to bo his
wife." "That is to say, aunt," re
marked Kato, very domurely, "you
novor saw a gontloman aftor your own
hoarL"
WOULDN'T BE DOWN.
An Uncomimiiilrnttve InillvliluiU's Aston
ishing DWplity of Clioolc.
There aro men who aro so unaccom
modating in tho way of giving infor
mation to strangors that tho sovorest
punishment would bo too mild for
them. An old follow went into an of
fico and asked a man, who sat scrib
bling, if Mr. l'odsworth had como
down.
"Not yoL"
"Knt)W what timo he'll bo down?"
"Can't say that I do."
-"ltogular man in ids habits, is ho
not?"
"Very."
"Thou you ought to know when ho
will bo down."
Tho man, without making any roply,
continued to sorlbblo; and tho old fol
low, aftor waiting pationtly and then
Impatiently during an hour at least,
laid:
"Seems to bo along timo incoming."
"Who's that?"
l'odsworth, of courso;"
"Oh, yes. Aro you waiting, for hlmP"
"Yos. Can't you glvo mo somo idoa
as to whon ho will bo down?"
Tho man mado no roply, having, It
lecmed, thought of something that
needed to bo scribbled down with tho
greatest rapidity. Noarly nnothor hour
' passed and thu old fellow, now thor
oughly worn out, said :
'Look hero. It don't seem that ho's
coming."
"Who?"
"l'odsworth, of courso."
"You moan Dan 1'odsworthP"
"Yes."
"Ho won't bo down."
"How do you know?"
"Well, 1 know In reason that ho
won't, for ho was burlod day before
yesterd uy. .1 rka it saw Tra vclcr.
It Won't Hurt Him.
"Sayl Sayl" callod a Montcalm
etroot woman to a tramp who had just
left iter door with a pleco of broad in
his hand ,4don't out thatl Tho girl
says it is a pleco wo had lying uround
with rough on rats on It?"
"It's too lato, madam," ho replied,
as ho swallowed tho last morsol. "I'vo
had pooplo try to play that trick on mo
beforo to get their goods back, but it
always falls. I prefer tho Btuff to but
ter, but don't say so, becauso I hate to
put peoplo to trouble "Detroit Free
Tret.
TITLES IN AMERICA.
rinln Truths for rprsons Who Covet Han
(lien to Tlirlr Olucure Nniiirn.
Mark Twain relates that when ho set
sail for tho Sandwich Islands ho alon.d
of nil his fellow-passengers found no
ono at tho wharf to bid him farewell
and wisli him a safe return. Mark fell
lonely, sad and insignificant, solitary
In the midst of a crowd, as ho watched
tho handshakings, the takings of leave
and last drinks by his fellow-passon
gers and their hosts of friends. But,
worse than all, the thought wormed its
bitter way through his bosom, wlint
would all tho other passengers think of
the mnn who set sail on a voyage to tho
cannibal islnnds unwept, unliquored,
unfarcwellcd. Ho noticed that all those
in whose company ho intended to dare
the dangers of the deepwero titled per
sonages Captains, Majors, Judges or
Honorablcs and all their friends, in
turn, were Honorablcs, Judges, Majors
or Captains. There was not a single
General, strango to say, in tho' whole
party. A thought struck him. Waiting
until tho ship had started, ho jumped
upon tho tall'rail, waving his hut, and
shouted:
"Good-bye, General!"
Instantly every hat in tho crowd was
waved in tho air and a mighty shout
went up
"Good-bye, Gencrall"
Mark stepped down from that tniTrnil
tho most admired, thereafter to bo tho
most courted, and oftenest Invited to
take something of any ono of nil that
ship's company. All of which goes to
show how grateful to tho average na
tive and naturalized American mind is
tho distinction which is, or is supposed
to bo', conferred by a title. Just as
stolen fruits nro sweet, so do those who
liavo no legal, military, naval, or civic
rights to tho use of such appendages
most enjo- tho verbal decoration of
complimentary titles that servo as
handles to their obscure names. And
how absurd all this calling of titles
sounds in tho cars of truo Americans;
how odd it must sound to a foreigner
who lands In tho United States enter
taining tho idea that Americans have
no use for, and hold in light esteem all
such brummaijem. No wonder thoy
laugh at and decry us as a nation of
snobs. "All men woro created equal"
wo declared a hundred years ago, and
yet wo use titles with a glibness that
would put to shame Debrott or Unrke.
Tho Mail believes, however, that a man
who fought through tho war and earned
his shoulder-straps is entiled to bo given
ids military designation. Wo find no
fault with him for being justly proud
of n well-earned fighting title. But
tho everlasting gabblo that confers ti
tles on men who woro nover in tho
army or navy, who novor enlisted oven
for tho purpose of jumping tho bounty,
is disgusting. Corn-cutters, billiard
sharps, bangers on banjos and blowers
of trombones dub themselves professor.
Pohco justices, justices of tho peace are
high Judges.
Thoro are, so far as wo know, but
two civic titles in tho United States
his Excellency, the Governor of Massa
chusetts, and his ditto, of Kcntuckv.
Peoplo who nro ignorant of tho pro
prieties address our chief magistrate as
his Excellency, tho President. Ho is
plain Mr. Provident, and should bo so
uldressed. Ho Is tho chief servant of
sixty millions of freemen. What honor
or distinction does lie or can ho gain
by having a titlo pinned to him? No
more than if, instead of his excellency,
ho woro called your Sereno High
bobbery. What glory clusters around
tho uamo Lincoln not tho Honorable
Mr. Lincoln; not Commander-in-Chief
of tho army, Abraham Lincoln; not his
Hxoolloney, President Lincoln but just
tho ono simple, unadorned surname,
Lincoln.
Tennyson, Disraeli woro thoy hon
ored by being botitled? Wo trow not.
Would Washington bo moro esteemed
as UtiUo ot 1 orktown, iUarquis ot
Trenton or Prineo of Mt. Vernon? As
well think of Grant as Duko of Appo
mattox, as think of plain, untitled U.
S. Grant lving on lus back blowing
soap bubbles. No ! This country is
not in the titlo business, and tho use
of them hero Is what our llritish cousins
would cull "blooming rot." Permit
tho Mail to add it is uu-Amoriean,
snobbish, absurd. Chicago Mail.
Tho Formation of Pearls.
Tho formation of mother-of-pearl is
doubtless a natural process taking place
in certain mussels. J lie formation of
pearls, on tho other hand, is ascribed to
accidents, ami probably Is caused by a
sickness of tho mussel, or by some
wound Intlioted on it, Tlvls view lias
been reached by noticing tho circum
stance that when the shells aro largo
and the inside smooth, clean and with
out any holes, so that the mollusks can
fully develop, pearls nro but rarely
found; while the formation of pearls is
very frequent when tho shells nro Irreg
ular. Sometimes hundreds of pearls
aro found in tho last-mentioned shells,
but frequently scarcely ono of them
possesses any commercial value. Ileal
pearls aro found only in bivalves; but
it useful product is found in somo uni
valves. Fourteen varieties are enumer
ated, the products of which aro known
to commerce. Among these nro tho
avieuln margarltlfei-.i, which produces
tho most valuable pearls; tho pinna
squamosa, with black and red pearls,
and tho chunk shell, with pale-red
petals. V. J". Star.
Fred, tlireo years old, and his baby
sister were to have a drink of water.
Fred reached for tho glass, saying: "Et
mo have it ilrss:" but mamma said
"No, little girls always first," Sir
Fred replied: "No, gen'loinon ilrss,
They're ju9 as slrsty as glrlsl" Baby-
hood.
THE BAZARS OF CAIRO.
Quaint nml Dlnjry Shops ami Their lUch
Oriental Treasures.
The Caircno bazars arc as marvelous
in their way as any thing one sees in
tliis "crazy-quilt" city. You can go to
them in a carriage, but not through
them. You can go through them par
tially on donkeys; but to see them
thoroughlyyou should go to them often
nnd on foot. Narrow alleys between
the low booths, where solemn-gowned
nnd turbaned creatures -it cross-legged,
smoking, drinking coffee, counting
their beads, or in 6ilent meditation.
From any of which employments they
will rouse themselves to say: "Very
sheep." "How much?" "Ten pias
tres." "Too much." "No, very
sheep." "Eight piastres?" "Ten."
"Six piastres?" "Ten; very sheep."
"Four piastres?" "No, no, no!" Then
you turn away laughing. Sometimes
you aro allowed to go; but usually you
are soon stopped, and the dialogue be
gins again, when you should stand
manfully by your lowest otl'er. "Ten
piastre?" "Four." "Eight piastre?"
"Four." "Six piastre?" "Four."
"Oh! I am ruined!" "Four." "Take,
take!" with an accent of despair that
seems to portend instant bankruptcy.
You feel a littlo mean, but recover
rapidly when the merchant having put
away your piastres eagerly oilers you
the rest of his stock at tho same price.
Then you feel "done," and inclined to
demand tho return of a part of your
money. There aro certain expensive
tilings, like silk, where you have to sit
down and spend tho morning. It is
very nmusing to see tho Anglo-Saxons,
fresh and fair and clean, and striving
to be patient, sitting among tho grave
and shadowy Orientals, and waiting
until n decent offer is made. Some
times tho alleys aro shaded from tho
sun by mattings or board 3 or rugs
strotclicd from roof to roof of tho high,
overhanging houses, and tho sunlight
strikes through rifts and cracks in rays
and spears of solid gold. Silks from
Damascus and soft stuffs of mixed cot
ton and silk; gold and silver orna
ments, bracelets and anklets, and
rings and collars ; rough work
from tho Soudnn and fine work
from smiths hero in Cairo ; pot
tery and brasswork, rags and mattings,
fruit and tobacco and grain, colfee and
drugs and china and carved wood,
scarfs and handkerchiefs, fire-arms and
swords and strango knives. In tho
Tunis Bazar aro tho Moors, who are
neither black, umbra, nor red nor
white, but aro of a strango bleached or
livid line. Hero arc woolen stuffs and
cotton stufl's, and slippers of curious
shapes and of all sizes and colors. Tho
wood bazar, where ono can seo and
smell tlio pine, dear to all Southern
hearts, and logs that might have como
from tho mosquito trees of Texas. The
spico bazar, darker and moro pictur
esque than any other, whore the air is
heavy with rich odors and perfumes,
somo familiar, some strange, and where
ono goes back involuntarily to the
familiar old story of how tho jealous
brethren, wishing to get rid of tho
young "dreamer," "lifted up their eyes
and looked, and behold a company of
Isiunaclites canio from Gilcad witli
their camols, hearing spices and balm
and myrrh, going to enrry it down to
Egypt." And so tho young Joseph
was sold. And to this day tho cara
vans como, bringing their spices down
into Egypt- Following tho tortuous
lane to what seems an indefinite ilis-
tanco refusing bargains anil beggars
on all sides, making your way with
dilllculty in some places becauso of tho
throng of people, you como at last to
tlio old town gate, tho Babez Zuweleli,
or, as it is often called, tho Babel Mut-
awolli, from a tradition that tho most
highly revered of all tlio Mohammedan
saints lives behind ono of tlio doors.
The two huge towers on either side aro
built of solid blocks of stone. The
gates have bars of iron on them, and
between tho iron and tlio wood aro
rows upon rows of nails, nnd on tho
nails aro bits of rags, of string, of
leather; bunches of hair and wool.
Tills extraordinary decoration is made
by people who enter into contracts or
who make vows a nail is put in as a
witness, or a piece of string is tied to a
nail already thoro. Once having dono
this, tlio Moslem fools ho lias sworn by
the holv saint, nnd will on no account
break His oath. Outsido tho gate hang
bales of wood and stono, thrown into
tlio city during tlio siegoof Mohammed
All. Cor. Louisville Courier-Journal.
Witches in Italy.
In spito of tho real or feigned igno
ranco of tlio leading Italian journals,
almost ovory considerable village in
tho south possesses a witch who Is well
known to thoso who nro likely to ro
quiro hor services, though both sho and
thoy do their best to keep the educated
class in ignorance as to their doings.
Sho is believed to stand in n direct con
nection witli tlio ovll one, and acts as
if sho herself shared tho bolief. Sho is
regarded by her neighbors with abhor
rence, though fear Induces them to
treat her with an almost servile respect
and to send hor small presents every
now and then. Her clients visit hor
secretly and sho will have no business
dealings with any ono who is unknown
to hor unless ho is introduced by n
friend. Though sho Is not above tho
uso of hocus-pocus, in many cases sho
frequently believes in her professions
ami in tho consequences it must en
tall. Sho nover goes to confession;
and when sho enters a church tho de
vout view hor with suspicion, for they
know that sho may uttor words which
will deprive even tho mass of its effi
cacy. WatybrtVs Antiquarian.
Mmo. NiUson says that sho will
sing no more in public, except now
Mid then for charity.
MRS. LOVELOCK'S TRUNK.
A Gooil Woman's Trying Experience With
a Soulless Corporation.
Tlio claim-agent of tlio Brass Bound
Railroad Company sat in his office, his
desk piled high with correspondence.
Ho had disposed of sixteen claims for
cows killed, thirteen sheep claims and
several personal injuries about tho
usunl daily average of accidents when
tho oflice-door opened, nnd a tall, an
gular woman entered.
"Be you tho claim-agent?" she de
manded, with a voice which sounded
like n cross between a buzz-saw and a
steam whistle.
"I be," responded that official, briefly-
"I come up hero to git pay for the
trunk I lost in the Coon Creek collis
ion." There had been a bad smash-up on
the road a few weeks before, and this
was one of tho claims growing out of it
which remained unadjusted.
"What is your name?" asked the
agent.
"Mrs. Lovelock, of Geneva," she it
plied. "Ah, yes," said tho claim-agent, "I
remember now. How much do you
think your trunk was worth, Mrs. Love
lock?" "Well, I dunno exnetly, but sh'rf
think abaout two hundred dollars
would be nigh tho value of it, and 1
wouldn't want you should pay any
moro'n it was worth."
"That's pretty steep," mused tho
claim-agent, looking at his note-book.
"Let's see how you make it. What
was the trunk itself worth, for in
stance?" "Well, it was a lino, large, now
trunk, an' I had jest paid fifteen dol
lars for it before I started."
The claim-agent mado a note of tlio
fifteen dollars. "Well, what was in
the trunk?" he asked.
"Leinnie see there was my best
Sunday dress a black silk the ma
terial in it cost twenty-livo dollars, an'
the makin' ten that makes thirty-five.
Then there was an alpaca dress, worth
about fifteen dollars, an' a new bunnit
Iliad just paid fifteen dollars for."
The claim-agent kept track of the
items. "That makes sovonty-eight
dollars; now what else?"
"Well," sho said, "there was con
sid'able other clothin'."
"What was thatworth?"
"1 dunno exactly, but I guess about
fifty dollars."
"Well, what clso now?"
Her memory seemed to fail her at
this point, but after a moment she con
tinued: "There was about seventy-live
dollars worth o' jewelry in the trunk."
"That makes something over two
hundred dollars," said tlio claim-agent.
"Well," she said, magnanimously,
"I don't want to bo hard on the
comp'ny. so we'll call it jest an even
two hundred."
"Trunk have any marks on it?"
asked the claim-agent, casually,
"It had a kyard with my name on
it," she answered.
"Got the check?"
Sho produced it.
"Seems to me you aro n little hard
on us," said the claim-agent. "Don't
you think you could reduce tlio amount
alittle?"
"No, sir," sho said, "an' if you don't
pay, I'll sue."
"Sorry to go to law with you.ma'ain,
but wo won't pay that claim."
Sho flounced out of her chair and
started tor the door.
"Wait a minute," said tho claim
agent, soothingly. "I guess wo can
make some arrangement."
She sat down again, and tho cinnw
agent stepped out into tho hall. When
ho camo back a porter followed him,
bringing under ono arm a small, yel
low trunk, tied about with a rope, and
somewhat tho worso for wear. Iteould
have been bought anywhero for a dol
lar and a half. Tlio claim-agent looked
at tlio card and compared tho checks.
"Is that your trunk?" ho asked.
Her face was red as a beet, as sho
acknowledged, with very bad grace,
that it was.
"Tho trunk hasn't been hurt at all,"
said the claim-agent, "excopt by tho
wetting it got when tho baggage-car
fell into tho creek. If you'vo got the
key here, we'll open it, and seo what
the damage was."
"I I've lost tho key," sho stam
mered. "Oh, woll, then, wo'll break It open,"
said tho claim-agent, cheerfully.
"Oh, no, don't do that," sho romon
Ftnwed. "It it ain't my trunk 1
boiroreil it from my sister, an' sho
wouldn't like that 1 should break tho
lock. I'd rutlier tako less money."
"1 guess you would," said tlio claim
agent, witli a chuckle. "I ain't been
claim-agent on this road for livo years
without meeting lots of peoplo like you.
Wo'll give you fifteen dollars for what
daiuago tho water may havo dono to
your baggage or, I'll opon tho trunk,
and you can bring your lawsuit."
"I'll tako tlio lifteon dollars," sho
replied, quickly, but snappishly. And
when she had got tho money and signed
a rceoipt, sho relieved hor mind by say
ing, as sho left tho otllco:
"I wouldn't a thought n rich comp'ny
like this would insult a lady that way.
But all men ain't gentlemen, an' cor
porations ain't got no souls nohow."
Charles 11'. Chcmutt, in Tid-BUs.
Timely Discovery.
Wife (aftor breakfast) You should
uso your tooth-brush, doar, beforo go
ing down town. I can dotcct traces of
tho shad roo we had at breakfast.
Husband (a bank cashier) Is that
so? Where is the tooth brush? With
shad at elghty-llvo cents a pleco, it
wouldn't do for tho directors to dis
cover any thing. X. Y. Sun.
SOME PERSIAN PRINCES.
Their Moral Development Kxhlbltlntr n Not
Very Cliarmlm; Type.
Most of the Kajar Princes arc av
aricious, and generosity, that grcal
virtue of the East, is almost extinct
witli them, writes a Teheran corre
spondent. A great and very rich
Prince, tlio Mahomet-ed-dowleh, was
sitting at the window of his room, look
ing on while some malefactors were
receiving tlio bastinado. A man was
just being told to lie down and put his
feet into tho felik tlie stick with the
noose which holds up the patient's feet
when he whispered something to tho
head ferrash, tho principal bastinado
operator. The Prince asked to know
what the man had been whisporing,
and was told that ho had promised to
give two tomans to tho operators on
tho condition that the beating was
done gently. Said the Prince: "Give
me four tomans and I will let you oil
altogether." He got the four tomans
(thirty-two shillings) and the man
went oil' free, to the great disgust of
the operators. The Hismet-ed-Dowlch
once thought himself obliged to give
a present to tho Russian Consul-Gen-cral
at Tauris, but, as generosity was
not his forte, lie wished to do it as
cheaply as possible, and sent a good
looking, but unsound horse. The Con
sul, whon the horse arrived, did not
take long to find out that the animal
was a dreadful screw, anil worth harillv
eight pounds. Now tho Prince had
told him lie would send him a horse
worth forty pounds. The Consul, with
many compliments, then pointed out
that the horso had been intended as a
souvenir, as he was going to Russia;
but that a horse was a most unsuitable
souvenir, being liable to die, and he
would be obliged if tho Prince would
give him the value ot the horse m
money, so that he might buy himself a
less perishable souvenir. The Prince
sent forty pounds, but swore lie would
not give any more presents to Eu
ropeans. I have seen one of the Shah's
cousins riding with a crowd of follow
ers through a field, destroying, per
haps, twenty shillings' worth of vege
tables and giving the poor, distracted
owner three small silver pieces, worth
threepence. I have seen another
Prince give a man who had risked his
life for him, and got severely wounded
in consequence, tho sum of seven
pence. The Shah am! tho Princes, when thoy
wish to confer a special mark of favor,
give a mantle or coat or hat any arti
cle of dress which they havo had in
use. Prince Sheikli-el-Mulook was once
in bad odor at court, and tho inhabit
ants of his littlo government knowing
that did not treat him with due respect.
Now, if he could prove that the Shalt
looked upon him with favor, the people
would become submissive; and how bet
tor to prove it than by getting a robe
of honor from tho Shah? He therefore
wrote to his daughter, who was one of
the Shah's wives, and asked her to get
what was wanted. Some weeks after
that the khalat the Persian term for
robe of lienor arrived. It was a night
cap. The Prince rode out four or five
miles from town, and there, at the
khalat-pusham the place where the
khalats are put on; every provincial
capital has a place destined for
this purpose solemnly put the
nightcap on his head, and
then rode into town, cheered and
salaamed by the populace. Afterward
the truo story, how tho nightcap had
been obtained, came out. Many time.
had tho Prince's daughter asked the
Shah for a khalat for her father, and
every time it had been refused. Finalh
slie became very importunate, anil the
irrasoiblo Shall I am not speaking of
the present one first annoyed, and
then in a towering rage, tore his cap
oil' his head and threw it at her with an
oath, sue titaiiKcu mm ami leu the
room with it. Anv mark of favor from
a high personage, any present, is called
o i n ' i
wronglv, perhaps a k
tinjniished stranger to Pe
khalat. A dis-
ersia was once
startled by all his servants running in
and telling him that the Prineo Nusrot-cd-dowleh
had sent him a khalat. The
Prince's servants, four or livo of them,
soon after appeared, ono of them carry
ing a huge copper tray, mysteriously
covered up witli a gold-befringed cash
mere shawl, worth at least thirty
pounds. Tho stranger got up and ex
pressed his thanks, mado many com
pliments; tho tray was then uncovered,
and there was the khalat two lettuces.
I think tlio stranger rowarded tho
Princo's servant's right royally, nnd
had an expensive salad that evening
for dinner. I still occasionally seo an
old gentleman, who, whenever ho pulls
his spectacles out of their case, a thing
mado of a piece of shawl, never fails to
say with prido: This spectaclo case
camo to mo from tho Shah." Ono of
his wifo's relations in tho roynl harem
had sent him tlio spectaclo case, having
probably picked it up after it had been
thrown away by tho owner. London
Globe.
"Mamma, diijn't you tell mo to do
just what baby wanted mo to?" asked
a littlo Cass avenuo boy who had been
left in charge of his baby brother.
"Yes, my dear," roplied his mother,
who had just como in. "Well, baby
wanted mo to eat up all tho sponge
cako, and now Flo's mad, becauso Mr.
Brown's coining to tea and thoro ain't
no cako." "But babj can't eat cako."
"No, but it amused him to seo mo cat
it." Detroit Tribune.
A correspondent of Xoles and Que
ties says thoro is little doubt that Dick
ens took tho nnmo of Pickwick from
"Mosos Pickwick," on many of tho
stago coaches that plied between Bris
tol and London sixty or soventy years
ago, and of which a man.by that name
was tho proprietor
Millionaire Flood has recently enclosed'
his San Frencisco palace with a bronze
fence which cost &SO,000, and he Is now
adding two large bronze gate., each
wplirbing 4 000 pounds, which will cost
15,000 more.
THE BEGINNING OF THE END.
Tho betrlnnlng of disease is a slight debility
or disorder of somo of tho vital organs, the
stomach, the liver or tho bowels usually. There
arc dyspeptic symptoms, tho liver is trouble
eome, tho skin grows tawny and unhealthy
looking, there are pains in the right side or
through the right shoulder blade. Tho climax
Is often an utter prostration of tho physical en
ergies, perhaps a fatal issue.. But if tlio dilll
culty is met in timo with Hostetter's fctomach
Hitters, which is always etl'ectlvo as a remedy,,
and it should be resorted to at an early stage,
thero will be no reason to apprehend those in
jurious subsequent effects upon the system,
often entailed by entirely cured diseases. Far
better is it. also, to employ this safe remedial
agent fn fever and ague, and other malarial
complaints, than quinine and other potent
drugs, which, even when they do prove effect
ual for a time, ruin tho stomach and impair the.
general health
The United States war stenmcr Galena -has
been ordered to the Canadian fishing:
grounds.
THE "FAVOWTli PRESCRIPTION."
Dr. It. V. Pierce, of Bunalo, N. Y.,
whose name has become known over the
world through his success as n physician,
and esoecially through the reputation o.
his "Golden Medical Discovery," has dono
a good work In preparing an especial rem
edy for the many distressing troubles
classed as "female weaknesses." It is
known as the "F vorite Prescription."
Under its administration all the pelvic or
gans are strengthened, and the woman be
comes that embodiment of health and.
beauty which God Intended her to be.
The city of Atchison Kan., owing to a.
lack of funds, is without either police pro
tection or street lights.
Julius 2.1etzkia was shot dead by George
Turner, a wealthy man, in Spartansburg.
county, S. C.
GREATEST DISCOVERY SINCE 1492.
For coughs, colds.sore throat, bronchitis,
laryngitis, and consumption in its early
st (ices, not liing equals Dr. Pierce's "Golden
Medical Discovery." It is also a great
blooa-purifler and strength-restorer, or
tonic, and for liver complaints and costive
condition of the bowels it has no equal.
Sold by druggists.
P. Robinson, who killed Charles Wil
liams at Oaperton, W. Va., was lynched
by a mob.
ALWAVS SAFE AND SURE.
It is safe to take Biiandhetii's Pills at
any time, but to get the best results they
should be taken on an empty stomach be
fore going to bed. For Constipation or
Dyspepsia one or two taken every night
will, in a short time, perforin an absolute;
cure. It is well to take a purgative at
least once or twice a month as a preventa
tive of disease. Bkandhetii's Pills are
entirely vegetable, and the safest and most
effective purgative ever introduced to the
public. They have been used in this coun
try for over lifty years.
Sudden changed ol" the Weather
often cause Pulmonary, Bronchial and
Asthmatic troubles. "Brown's Bronchial
Troches" will allay irritation which in
duces coughing, giving immediate relief.
Sold only in boxes.
The Artvmico Thresher is the best.
Write Z. T. Wright, Portland, for partic
ulars. Agent Wanted everywhere, Small sale
able article. II. M. Stevens, 633Jeett Place, Minne
apolis, Minn.
No Opium in Piso's Cure for Consump
tion. Cures where other remedies fail. 25c.
WOMEN
Needing renewed utrcnctb, or who tutttr from
Infirmities peculiar to their ex, should try
THE
TDNIC.
This medicine combines Iron with pure Ttte table
tonics, and is Invaluable for Diseases peculiar to
Women, and all who lead sedentary lires. It I'.u
rlclies and Purines the lllond, hllniuliites
the .Appetite, Strengthen the Muxclcs and
Norvcs-in fact, thoroughly Invigorates.
Clears the complexion, and makes the skin i smooth.
It does not blacken the teeth, cause headache, or
produce constipation o( olhtr Iron midieinet ito.
Mas M. A, Pbeston. Forrest Grove, Oroiron, says :
" I suflerel for ears with Weakness, llrown 8 Iron
Hitters has made me well. Iwouldnotbewitheutit.
MB8. CIIA8. A. SCSINEn. 1366 Ninth Ave.- i-.ast
Oakland. Oal says: " I have used llrown's Iron Bit
ter for Headache and Weakness with much benefit,
lieforo using the secojid bottle I felt better and
stronger. I recommend it as a most valuable tonic."
Mils. MAnv DliANKL, 54 Oak St :., , 8an Francisco,
Oal , tdiya: " I used Brown's Iron Hitters for Nervous
Headache and it cured me."
Genuine has above Trade Mark and crossed red linol
on wrapper. Take no other. Made only by
llltoWN CHKMIOAI. CO,, llALTIMOIlE.MIl
SNELL, HEITSHU & WC0DARD,
Wholesale Agents, Portland, Or..
"20Te"nr LYDIA E.
HCCOrd. AL- - 0
PINKHAiyi &
VEGETABLE
COMPOUND,
Isn Tosltlie Curo
ALL of thoso Painful
Delicate Complamtt and
Complicated trouble! and
Weaknesses so common
amorg our Wives, Mothers,
and Daughters.
II will curt enttrtlv
allomrianorvaglnat
troubles, lnfla m mo
tion ami lIrt-rtv-Uon,
Falling ami
Ditjltacemaitsi J
consequent sjtnal
l!U-):-J,mu( It
" " " uiri.ui o uuinriicMU CAOnpO Of lJt
Latxes, it wm, kot VEByoRM sroaicit. opeiutjoxs ca
CCHE CAXCXB, BUI IT WTLLFSDEK 1IX CIBCTHSTAXCtS, ACT
IN niHMOXT WITH TUB I.AWSOF KATTUE, GTTUAT rEEUXOt
or tEABixa Dow-y, cirsixo tact, weight ami Backache.
IS ALWAYS rElUHXEXTXY CUSZO BY ITS 178 E.
JOSlSoIdhy IiruKtrlsts). Price 81. per battle
Urs. rinLlism'sI.lrer I'llHc-jrocoustlnatlon. S5c.
HALL'S
SARSAPARILLA
Cares all Diseases originating from a
disordered state of the BLOOD or
LIVER. Rheumatism, Neuralgia,
Boils, Blotches, Pimples, Scrofula,
Tumors, Salt Rheum and Mercurial
Pains readily yield to its purifying
properties. It leaves the Blood pure,
the Liver and Kidneys healthy and the
Complexion bright and clear.
J. R. GATES Sl CO., Proprietors.
417 S&nsomo St.. Bon Francisco.
ma H
PI' BEST
E JL.A ' For