ROSEBURG REVIEW
IS ISSLKD
FRIDAY MORNINGS
C BY -
THE REVIEW PUBLISHING CO.
J. 11. N, BELL, - - Editor.
ROSEBURG" REYIKW
HAS THE -
FINEST JOB OFFICE
IN DOUGLAS, COUNTY.
CARDS, BILL HEADS, LEGAL BLANKS
And other Printing, Including -
Large and Heavy Posters and Showy Hand Billt
Neatly nd Expeditiously executed
One Year . -Six
Months -Three
Months
$2 50
1 '25
1 00
VOL. XL
ROSEBURG, OREGON, FRIDAY, DECEMBER 10, 188G.
NO. 3G
AT PORTLAND PRICES.
Roseburg.
RevieWo
UEflEBAL DIRE0T0BY-
Gbovee Cleveland .President.
Thos. F. Bayabd .Secretary of .Statu
Daniel T. MANMNG.Secrctary of Treasury.
L. Q. C. Lam Alt .Secretary of the Interior.
Wm. C. Endicott. Secretary o War
W. C. Whitney. Secretary of Navy.
W. T. Vila Post Master General .
A, H. Gaelakd Attorney General.
Morrisox R. Waitk . .Chief Justice.
STATE OF OHEGON.
BrsoER Hermann Congressman.
Z. F.- Moody Governor.
R. P. Earhart Secrctaryof State.
Edward Hirscii State Treasurer.
E. B. McElroy ....Supt. Pub. Instruction.
W. H. Byars State Printer.
J. B. Waldo, C. J.,)
Wm. P. Lord, Supreme Judges.
W. W. TlIAYEK, )
SECOND JUDICIAL DISTRICT.
R. S. Bkax..... Jude.
J. W- Hamilton... .Prosecuting Attorney.
, - ? DOUGLAS COUNTY.
John Emmitt,
J. H. Shupe, j
Wm. Massing, '
HESRy Rogers, I
Q. W. Riddle, i
.. Senators.
. ..Representatives.
G. B. Wilcox, )
Thos. R. Sheridan Clerk.
Ben. C. Agee Sheriff.
D. S. West , Treasurer.
G. T Russell School Superintendent.
Jas. A. Sterling Assessor.
J. S. FiTZHi'GH County Judge.
J. Hall, C. A. McGee Commissioners.
N. E. Brit .. .Surveyor.
Dr. S. S. Marster.s . . . .Coroner.
THOS. Smith Seeep Inspector.
PRECINCT OFFICERS:
T. L. Gannon.
I as. IIarpham
Justices.
1'F.TER Jl'NOER Con-4al)le
CITY OF KOSERURG.
II. C Stantos, '
John Mast, I .
. V. SHfcRIDAN,
. . . Tnist i't
O' L. Wilms.
P. Krnkihct. ,
T. Ford Recorilur.
Jons IIowaru Marshal.
Will H. Fisher Treasurer.
U. S. LAND OFFICE ROSEBURG,
Ciias. W. Johnston Register.
A. C. Joxes Receiver
SIGNAL SERVICE.
B. S. Pague Observer.
PROFESSIONAL.
L F. LANE. JOHX LANE
J ANE & LANE,
Attorneys at Law.
Maiu street, opposite Cosmopolitan Hotel.
J.
C. FULLERTON,
Attorney at Law.
Office in Marks' brick, up stairs.
f B. WILCOX,
Attorkey At Law
- Office opposite E. G. Young & Co's.
Oakland Oregon.
g J. PAGE
PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON.
Oakland, - - - Oregon-
R. C. HUNTER M. D.
PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON.
CAXYO&TILLE OREUOX
" K. L.' MILLER, M. D
Surgeon.
Homoeopathic Physician.
Olfiice up stairs in the old Sheridan
Brick, on Jackson Street, Roseburg,
Oregon. Chronic diseases a speciality.
W. L. FREEMAN M. D.
OFFICE IN DR. HOOVER'S OLD
Stand, where he may le found day or
night when not professionally engaged.
WSl'ECIAL Attention Given to SURGERY
?nd Diseases of Women.
Dr. THOMAS GRAHAM,
A GRADUATE
Of the t'mvenmy of Ta. at Philadelphia and ol the
ROYAL COLLEGE OF SURGEONS, and ROYAL
COLLEGE OF PHYSICIANS, LONDON ENGLAND
has located for the practice of his profession in
ROSEBURG . ... - OREGON.
Offlce")d residence, Washington stret opposite
the Catholic Church
F. G. (EHME, M. D.
(Pronounced A una.)
. HOMCEOPATIIIC PHYSICIAN
cV Graduate Of The
UNIVERSITY
Of Leipzig Germany.
Office & Residence at the house of
Geo. W. Day, near R. R. track, Rose
burs. nFAKRY,
Merchant Tailor.
in the Red Front, next door to A. C. Marks
Store.
Repairs aud Alterations neatly done.
L BELFILS
Watohmakhr.'
I feel confident of Riving satisfaction in nil work
entrusted to me hi watches, clocks, and jewelry.
I also repair musical instruments.
- I hare the County patent rii;ht for gale of Concrete
Cement Pipe for conveyin water to any place de
aired in Douglas Couuty.
I will also teach any kind of Instrumental music.
Anyone desirfng instruction will call on me at my
watchmaking shop. BK,ru,8.
NEW. YORK LUMBER
& Wood Yard
o To M 11. Howell's
East side of track one block "south of
depot is where you will Hud number
one dry lumber, Sugar pine, Cedar,
Fir, and all Diincntion lumber for
buildings, sawed and shaved cedar
shingles, Sash Doors, Blinds, Screen
Doors, Mouldings, Wall and Stair
railings, Balusters, Brackets, Newel
posts, Ceiling, Rustic, Flooring, and
all kinds of Finishing lumber, sawed
and split Cedar posts, H inch plank
sawed expressly for sidewalks. I
represent the Sugar Pine Door fc
Lumber Co. of Grant's Pass Or. which
from personal inspection I believe . to
be the finest establishment on the Pa
cific coast, it employes seventy men.
The Proprietors and Overseers 'are all
Eastern men and experts in the busi
ness, the machinery is new aud put
up in the best manner, and all under
srtict discipline and order. Their
work is all done by number one me
chanics ami is equal to any work of
the kind done in New Yoik or the
East. Fruit boxes, Picket fences and
Gates complete. 1 also represent a
number one mill at Yoncolla where I
have sawed all Dimention lumber to
order on short notice. All guatanteed
as represented or no sale. Call and
see stock and prices before purchasing.
Stove wood constantly on hand at
Il.iKI) Tilli; I'KK'ES.
OVERLAND TO CALIFORNIA
VIA
OREGON AND CALIFORNIA R. P.
Ami Connections.
TIME, 2i HAYS.
Karc fnm Portland to San Francisco .12; to Sacra
mento 50.
Close connections made at Ashland with stages o
the California Oregon & Idaho Stajre Company.
(DAILY EXCEPT SUNDAYS.)
East Side Division.
BETWEEN PORTLAND & ASHLAND
Mail Train
LEAVE. I AfUUVK.
I'ortlaml S.0QA. M. RiMM-burg. . . .(US
liosebur' fi.25 I". SI. Ashland 4.1X1
Ashlauil 8.43 1'. M. Itoselmrx o.O.'i
Iloseburg 5.15 A.M. 1'ortland 3.l."
Albany Express Train
I.KAVE. I AltKIVE.
Portland 4.CC r. M. I I.eb:inni n.-jo
P. M.
A. M.
A. M.
1'. M.
P. X.
V. M.
Lebanon 4.4SA. XI. I 1'ortland 10.05
PULMAN PALACE SLEEPING CAES
Daily between I'ortlaud and Ashland.
Tlie O. and C. K. R. Ferry makes connection with al
tbe rojfular trains on East Side Div. from foot of F St
West Side Division-
BETWEEN FORTLAND & COR VAULTS
If ail "f laiii. '"" t "
LEAVE. I AKIUVE.
Portland . .
.7.30 A. M.
i f... 1 1 :n ... nr n f
Corvallis..
.1.30 P. M.
Portland . 6.15 I. l!
At Corvalli connctwith trains of Orejon Pacific
lor "an,uiiia IJay.
Express Train-
LEAVE. A RIM VE.
Portland..... '..4.50 P. M. Mi-Mimivillc. . 8.00 P. M.
McMinnville 5.45 A. M. Portland U.OO A. M.
Local tickets for sale and batrac cbecked al com
pany's up town odlcc, cor. Pine and Second streets,
rickets for principal Hintsiii California can only bo
IirH:ured at company's ollicc.
Corner F and Front Sts., Portland, Or.
Frciv'bt will not be received for himcnt after 5
o'clock P. M. on either the East or West Side liv.
It. KOK1ILEH, E. P. ROGERS.
Manager. G. F. & Pass Aj:cnt.
CHICAGO
COTTAGE
ORGAN
Has nttained a standard of excellence which
admits or no suporior.
Itcontains every improvement that inventive
genius, skill aud money can produce.
Theso Organs aro celebrated for volume,
quality of ton quick; response, artistic dcBien,
beauty in finish, perfect construction, making
tliera tho most desirable or)ran9 for homes,
Schools, churches, lodges, (societies, etc.
ESTABLISHED REPUTATION.
tJNEQrAEED FACILITIES,
SKILLED WORKMEN.
BEST MATERIAL,
COMBINED, MAKE THIS
THH POPULAR ORGAN
Instruction Books and Piano Stools.
Catalogues and I'rioe Lists, on application, fbka
CHICA60 COTTAGE ORGAN CO. .
Cr. Randolph and Ann Sts.. CHICAGO. ILL
MILLWOOD MILLS
OX UUBBAKD CREEK.
CLARKE it BAKER, Proprietors.
IV- nM n..n. .c.iiit.l 4i Ittntib lotnbr n tile
lcst quality in quantities to suit the purchasers,
always having on hand the largest stock of any mil
iu Douglas County.
We will furnUh lumber at our mill at thefolUnuii!,'
PRICES.
No-1 roiili luuiher SS to $10 M
No, 1 f)NrinK, G inch I i M 16 M
So. 1 flooring, 4 inch l & M SIS M
No. 1 fiiiishing luinKT $16 M
CLARKE & BAKER.
CITY DRAYING
DONE WITH DISPATCH.
(JALL OS
JOS. CARLOS.
OUR IS :.':i5?-u EVE BY
t I1'' " !'i' OBGAK
I II WAB-
18 T BANTED
FOB
TO B h i
" FIVE
SXCEXj. ,t YEAB9
Lv, Li-
HOTELS AND RESTAURANTS
BMLEY'S HOTEL
Oakland, Oivsoii.
Board $1 per Day; Single Meals, 25 cents,
sTTiiig house has lately changed bands and Is
oroughly renovated and refurnished. The travel-
nj; public will And the best f accommodations .
No Clduamou Iinploj'ed,
SMITH BAILEV.
ABSOLUTELY FIRS1' t'l.ASS
M'
RS. D.C. McCLALLEX,
Proprietor of the
McCLALLEN HOUSE.
rarge Sample Rooms for Commercial
Travelers.
Coach o and from the house
Bjjkc dclivere free of charge.
DEPOT HOTEL,
OAKLAND, OKKCON.
I.ioliiirl TIionui, I?i-o.
SLEEPING ACCOMODATIONS.
AND THE
Table supplied with the Best the Market affords
Kotul at tho Dopot of tho Ritilioad.
Central Hotel !
io.sioi$uiso.oiji:ooin,
OPPOSITE OAULON S LIVEKY STAISi.E.
lJunrihiml Lmlint; pcnlay $1.00
' " wedi 5.00
" Willumt Lodtjiu"; 4.00
Meals,. 25 centSi Lodging, 25 cents
Thorutih satisfaction i promised to travel
ers and the putilic (jcnerallv.
MRS- GARRISON, In...
No Chinese employeil.
New Restaurant !
.1. I'U'iiM'iils I'roirietor.
IiO.SEUUUli ORECON.
One li"i wulli .ii i: 1 -t in ' srw :'v bti)i v.
MEALS '.: cla.
MOORES RESTAURANT.
(Princljiaal Eusincas Street.) .i.
MEALS 25 CENTS LODGING 25 CENTS
We Keen the Best tho Market Affords.
CIVIL DEND STORE
V. Ii. ARRINGTON,
DEALKK IX
Dry Goods Groceies etc
Ml Kinds of Produce Taken in Exchange
CIVIL BEN 1), DOUG. CO., OHEGON".
NEW STORE
AT
1ILLAR1-, OK.
would respectfully inform the public that he
haa 011 hand a line assortment of
Wry iSoods, Groceries
Rea1y-3Ialc Clothing
aud in fact everything naually kept at a
tirst-claas store. Uivo him a call.
Goods at Low Prices.
All kinds of Produc
Taken in Exchange for Uoods.
13.A11 orders promptly attended to.
MRS. S. A. HI Tt'IIISSOX,
-MILLINERY STORE!
Oalflaml, On-fjon.
tAOIES WILL V.SD MY STOCK LARGE ASD
Cumplcte. rriccs niiKltTutc.
C.iiH M" CU. Mks. S. A. IIitchi.nson.
Brewster's Tatent Rein Holder.
Tonr lines are whore yoa put them not
under uorses' reeu une asent soiu is qoz. a
5 days, one dealer sold O Asm. in 15 days.
Samples worth $U50 fees. Write tor terms.
. E. JJKEWSTEB, DoUy, Kich.
THE
New York Coffee House
HESTATJI?,A.rT
SAnd Oyster Saloon,!
Leading Checli llc&tanrant
in the City.
SIFERD HACKNEY. PROPRIETORS
132 FIRST STREET,
PORTLAND OREGON,
tSTTn vat c Rooms of the Latest Designs for Ladies
OPEN DAY A"D MGHT.
imvix;
PURCHASED
The Entire StOL-k of
i3:x3xc.cxz.zrxxs3a.
-o of O-
I. R, DAWSON,
At
RIDDLE
-OREGON
Consisting of
ROOTS,
SHOES,
CLOTIllN(!,
DRV coons,
hardware,
croceries,
Etc. lite. Etc. Etc. Etc.
Am now t-tl'i'i iti 1 h(; saino
At Prices That Defy
Competition.
FOR-
CASH
At-
Oregon.
F. Oornutt.
ALL PERSONS. KNOWING THEMSELVES l.V
deh'cri to Ninth Cornutt will plaa.se call at my
:flce t uidxiles at the store and settle at once.
THE GRAPE CURE.
SAL-MUSCATELLE
In America
WITHOUT THE EXPfxl3 OF AN
ETJB0PAN J0T3 EN FY!
The cTjstaliied Siilts, us ubtaincd in a pure state
from Kr:i!S and choice fruit, in a portable, palat
able, simple ! Tin, are now presented to the public of
America as the grandest resolvent of impure blood,
corrector of the liver and regulator of the bowels
the Mat ill al pnnnotcr of
HE ALT II AND LONGEVITY.,
Kniineut physicians claim tliis achievement a new
era in the allied science of medicine, as it furnishes
the bliMHl with its natural saline that aro lost or
eliminated ci cry day
SAL-M USC ATELLIU
A POSITIVE, NATURAL
SICK JIB AD AC JIB A2fJ
DYSPEPSIA CUIIE.
Sal-Muscatelle is Nature's own product. It sup
plies to the system the want of sound, ripe (trap0
and fruit; it fs the simplest and host preventive aud
cure for all functional derangements of the liver and
kindred ailments prevents the absorption of ma! ari
al diseases fevers cf all kinds; counteracts the ef
fects of had air. poor tlrainairc and impure watnr; a
powerful oxydizcr of the hloixl; a natural specific
for all skin eruptions, sick headaches, biliousness,
nervousness, mental depression, and will remove the
effects of accidental indigestion from excessive eat
ing and drinking. Have it in your homes and on
your travels. It is a specific for the iHjcd, weary
and worn-out.
Prepaired by the
Loxdon Sal-Mcscatelle Co.
LONDOX, EXOtiXD.
Beware of iniiUtioii3. The genuine in "blue
wrapenj only."
t3Scid forclrculari G. EV NOVITCH, General
American Manager, P. O Box V.m, New York City.
Mention this paper. Fur sale by S. Ham lton Rose
burg Oregon.
The BUYERS' GODK la
luml HrnL. And March,
1 8 x 11 iaeoetWua ui"
'3,SOO UlnstrmUons a
rnole Picture Gallery.
flivo Wltoleaale Price
am II foods for
personal or family ne. Tells bow to
order, and giTe exact cost of every
thing yon use, eat, drink, -wear, or
hare fun with. These I3rVAMJABIE
BOOKS contain Information gleaned
from the markets of the world. We
will mail a copy FREE to any ad
dres upon receipt of 10 Ct. to defray
cxpcnM of maUlns. lt ns hear from
yoa. Respectfully,
MONTGOMERY WARD & CO.
827 dc 22 Wakash Aveaae, Chicago, 111.
This paper is kept on file at E. C. Dake s
advertising agency, 64 and 65 Merchants' Ex
change, San Francisco, Cal where contracts
for advertising can be made for it.
EVERY rARMER HIS OWN
hi-, ' : MTLLER.
j The Youna America Feed Mill is a
mill that every farmer ctm afford to
bujrj i durable, easy controlled; any
boy ,aUo to drive a learn can handlu it;
1 S;rlufs'fint; br ootirof. Tin t Tif T7i nds
corn with or withoutrob, oats, rye etc.,
corn tncal for house tiso.
SlIEIilPAN HliOS. A "flit.
O.P TOMPKINS.
COMMISSION I PURCHASING
Agent of
AIL KINDS OF MAW
A., onlerj fruiu Hit- country filled ti sliort
inti-e from
Every Class or Kind of (Jootls from
Fiiht-t.'lass Stock.
AIMtliitely no tliares or foiimii.ssion.
will !; cliared lillin orders.
OFFICE: 107 fmist stiiket,
At l. W. I'kknii. k's l'..rtl.iml,Or
Obtained, and all Palcnt MtKiitcsg in the I". S.
1'atent, uillco attended to for MOOEKATK FlilOS.
Ourotll'TC is '0)HMitc ths V. S. Patent Olllee, an 1
wc can obtain Patent in less time than those re
mote troin WASHINGTON
.s;iid MODKLOIt KKAWIXG. We adise as to
atcntability free of oliaro; and o make No
I'll Alio K I NLKNS WE OHTA1X l'ATKST.
We refer litre to the Postmaster, tlieSiiit. of tl.e
.Money Order Div., and to ollicials of the l;. S. Pat
ent Office. Kor circular, advice, terms and referen
ces to actual clients in your own State or county,
write to
i A.SXOW&CO..
Oliisite IMent Ollice,- Washington, 1). C.
Henry Uaston 's
lOSEBUUO GROCERY S''OUE.
K
EErSCONSTAIfTLY on hand a full assortment
of .
GROCERIES'
Of AHifitids!
f Ouaranteai to be of thet qualily;
FRUIT JAKS,
CANNED FRUITS, I i
. TOBACCO and CIGARS,
TEA, COFFEE,
SUGAR,
A SPECIALTY,
CANDIES and CAKES.
Produce 13ouglit
AND THE
Highest CASH PUICk Paid'
Givo me a call and eoiiiuce yourselves.
GOODS delivered anywhere in the til.v
Limits free of Charge.
Henry Baston
Jackson Street,
JASKULEK,
f racllcnl
Vattliinak-r, Jeweler ami Opticiau.
- ALL WOUK WARRANTED.
Dealer iu Watches, Clock?, Jewelry,
Spectacles aud Eyeglassea.
A FULL LINK OF
CIUARS, TOBACCO & FANCY GOODo.
THK ONLY RHLIVBLE OITOMEK IN' TOWN
for the proper adjustment of Sp 'circles. Pvpot
of the Genuine Itrazilian Pebble Spectacles and Eye
glasses, oince in iiamlltou s iirick uiock.
JOSEPH SIITNDLER.
PROPRIET 0 R
Of The
CITY BAKERY
AND
KEEPSi CONSTANTLY ON HANI) A
full stock of Bread, Cakes, Ties, Plain
and Fancy Crackers, etc. Also a fine selection
of French and American Candies ami Choc
late Goods
FROM
ROSEBURG TO EMPIRE. CITY.
From Kostburg q LooTHng Glass ......$ .75
" ' " Foot of mountain. .. . 2.00
" " Dora 5.00
" Fuitview 5.50
" " ' .Sumner , ... 6.50
' ' Marshfield 7.00
" Empire City 7.50
DAILY EXCEPT SUNDAY.
For I'arliclar3 Inquire at the Post Office.
Jas C aicCWLLOCII, Prop.
fl.ldi tn KiiNi M thaw ko writ !
BUnwn Ca.PoHUnd, Mala, will raecir
fr, fall tafomutioa .boat work which
th.r ea do. and Ht M bom,Uit will pj
Ibam from tS to IK Mr dT. Bom bra
mrw4 Tr $0 in r. Either Mi.yoos; or old. CUj
potrqlrd. YoatraMart fr. Tboboirl ooo
n
TROYAL M&'.lt JXi XI
Wit :
IS m
Absolutely Pure.
This powilcr never vaiieg. A marvel of furitv
trcuth and wliolesomciicss. More economical
than tlie ordinary kinds, and cannot be sold in com
H.'tition with the multitude of low test, short
weight alutii or ihofliatc m,h dcrs. .Sold ouly iu
cans. ROYAL DAKINC TOWDKIt CO., 10C Wall
St. N. Y.
Look Sharp Now!
IF YOU IIAVE (UJXS
Or Sewing Machines
(iMiiythinf-else that n-u.l.s liEL'All'
IN!, stud it to
CAliL AVlilBKK,
M HOSEliUJMJ, Shop on Main St.
.SATIS FA CT1 ON G U A I J A N T E E I)
Douglas County Bank,
IIUMPllliEY Jk FLINT,
Roboburc - - . Oregon-
TRANSACT A GENERAL
BANKINGJBUSINESS
Siglit Drafts Drawn on
Portland, Sau Fraucisco, New York and
oilier points. Pills of tAL-liango on the
principal cities of Europe. Deposits re
ceived subject to check. Collections made
ou all aeecssablepoiuts at reasonable rates.
OREGON PACIFIC R.R
Willamette Vallejr to San Francisco Via.
Taqnina-
I DAILY TRAINS,
TRAINS LEAVE COHVALLIS
Daily, except Sundays, at l.fji V. S.
LEAVE VAjriN.
Uailj, except Sundays, at 7.;5'J A. M.
The Company rcsene the riht to 1 ban ye
sailing days. Fares ami Freight at re lin ed ami
moderate rates
Kiver Boats on lh-j Willam ;tto i-.mneclin
Corvallis.
J. C. SHERIDAN
i?iSiicccssor to jt-f
11 8 a J. C SHERIDAN
DEALER IN- -
HARDWARE
Stoves ami Tiinviire,
THE undersigned takec pleasure in an
nouncing to the public that he se'Jing
everything iu his liuc at prices that
DEFY COMPETITION!
IF YOU WANT
STOVES, AGEI0ULTUK4.L TOOLS
IRON, STEJjL, NAILS.
HO ESS HOES, TINWARE, CUTLERY
Or anything in my line, call aad examine my
stock and learn prices before purchasing else
where, as I am selling lower than ever.
J C. SHERIDAN
niilXS MAKIXU.
I AM PHEPARED TO DO
FIRST CLASS
w
o k in this line, aud ask a share of the jatroiiagc
01 noseuurr ana vicinity.
ELMIN. V CKCMP
Next door to L. &dfi,ls JnUrj Store, Uoseburj
Oregon
This paper is kept on Die at the o(9ee of
iYERoSOK
DVERTISINq
GENTS
TIMES BU1LD1NQ gSSjJ PHlUDrlPrHIL
teTIUlTCC FuBTOIBl loraTisiic CBCC
to 1 1MAI LO at Lowest Cash Rates 1 ntC
iAYER & SON'S MANUAL
MARRIAGE GUIDE
260 PAGES. Illwtrcted, in CMh and Gilt Bindir.e.MT
vmatj or vtunpt. Bnw. ppr cover, use. Thu Boof eon
'?''" th tutiont, doubtful or inquiiitiTc vantlo know,
rullpf Ttry iDtrrttinr ami Talutble informition HKiLTN
IlllirjT .4 HAPPIKEHg ur pronMte.1 by iU .d2Jh5
may Myrry, who not. why: Mediral Aid whm "tZcZZ,
to lift. Youoe or old, marrird or.injl,. t.t or well ihond
tttdit 6nt mI.1 by DR. WHITTIER. S. L..:1 aaJJ
FARM FOR SAIX.
One Small Fai nt for sale containtnt;
230 acres, CO acres good farming land.
The balance good timber and pasture
well watered and all fenced. For par
ticulars enquire of
F. Corsutt, Riddles, Oregon.
1
lm f m 1
A NOTED FUNNY MAN
SAYS FOLKS ARE OVER-STOCKED
WITH HUMOROUS MATTER.
A Humorist Found ou AUnosSt Every
Paper The Work Done by Local
Funny Man Twain, Cbl, Jtye, Kilcy
andM. juad TlrcrfOufc iV
"The humorous pariers, as. a class, don't
hold the distinctive place they did a few
years ago," said Iloljcrt J. Bnrdette, iu a
conversation at the Monongahela house
the other afternoon.
"What I mean," he continued, "is that
nearly every - paper of any size in the
country has discovered that it has one or
two men who write creditable humor.
They may not make a department of it, or
the man my-utt foe &v-lea fanny nirvti
ont yoa can sec Jt cropping ont au tDrii;h
the paper. Yon" will find in the citj de
partment reports with touches of bright
ana original humor which would do credit
to a professional. You will And it in the
editorial department aud the paragraphs,
and even in the head lines of the telegraph
editor. Then, too, most papers have
adopted a department of clipped humor.
This effect has been produced on tho daily
and weekly newspapers by the humorous
papers, and while it has brightened up
tlie former considerably, it has, to some
extent, hurt tho humorous papers, as it
furnishes aliout all that sort of matter
that most people care to read,"
The conversation running upon the lec
ture platform, the humorist was asked if
ho had met the Bill Xye and Whitconib
Kiley combination.
"No, I have not," he replied, "but I un
derstand they are very successful. Tliat
rarely happens, when two lecturers travel
together. I dou"t think it would be possi
ble for two humorists to make a successful
combination. The similarity would sur
feit an audience.
"Now Mark Twain and Cable were two
of the 1est combinations I ever knew. One
could hardly conceive of two more op
posite, in manner, taste, style, and every
thing else, than these two. Mr. Cable is a
small, refined, scholarly man, very quiet,
almost effeminate in look and manner, and
Twain, tall, ungainly, with a sort of west
ern dash about him. They alwayg act as
a foil to each other, and an audience never
tires of them."
UE GETS T1IJED OUT AT LAST.
"What has become of your Railroad
Passenger1" was asked.
"Oh, I get tired of running it. I never
could keep up a line of sketches of any
sort. They make mc tired. The only
man who can do that sort of thincr. and da
it well for so long a period, is C. B. Lewis,
of The Detroit Free Press. Year in and year
out he goes on grinding out that Limekiln
Club and the Central Police Court, and I
can't see but what it is as bright and
quaint as it was at first. It is a wonder to
me how he does it. I can not do it.
and if I try it I get bo disgusted
with the subject, that I wouldn't
write it for $100 a column. I am getting
tired of writing any way. Next summer
I am going to take a tent and go up In the
mountains and camp out for four mouths,
clear away from every one. I think it will
be a relief to the public as well as my
self." "When Is that new book of yours coming
out?"
"Well, now, I've heard of that book. The
newspapers flash it up about as often as
they do my discoverer. According to the
newspapers, Frank llatton discovered me,
and brought me before a king-suffering
Worl'V Phocian Howard also dtagged mo
out of my rural nonenlty to the pitying
azes of tho public, and some twenty-five
other newspaper men claim tho distin
guished honor of boosting me np among
the pinnacles of fame. I am going to call
a convention of my discoverers, or else
send out circulars asking for a loan from
each of them." Pittsburg Dispatch Inter
view, rcriodical Plagues of Mire.
At intervals of a few years, the Brazil
ian colony of Lourenco suffers from a re
markable visitation of field mice, tlie latest
of which, in 1876, has just been described
Dr. II. Yon Hiring. These creatures, ordin
arily not numerous, appeared in enormous
quantities, and iu a few days destroyed
the fields of corn, potatoes, clover, oats,
barley, gourds, pumpkins, and even weeds,
actually damaging houses to a considerable
extent and ruining furniture and cloth
ing. The periodical occurrences of these
plagues seems to be due to the chief food
supply of the mice, the seeds ttf the
bamboo-grass, which at regular Intervals
of six to thirty yearn, matures over a large
territory, and then disappears. The field
mice increase so rapidly that, if all the
conditions which keep them in check were
removed, a single pair would bear a
progeny of 33,0uo individuals in a single
Kiimmer, and every living thing upon the
earth would be consumed in a half-dozen
years. Arkansaw Traveler.
Acres for England's Laboring C'tttmes.
The question of allotment of ground to
the laboring classes In England, and on
which the Tory government was defeated,
has been solved in a very practical man
ner by Sir George Wombwell. On his es
states In Yorkshire, comprising 13,t)00
acres, nearly all the cottages in the Im
portant villages have three acres of grass
let with them some have more and to
every cottage is attached n cowhouse, pig
gery, and garden of good size adjoining the
cottage. The rent of cottage and garden is
4 to 5, and foyeowgate of three acres 6.
Tho present system of allotments on this
estate has been in existence more than
fifty years, and the owner increases the
number of these bandings at ever oppor
tunity, as in practice they answer welL
San Francisco Chronicle.
Amateur Medical Treatment in Italy.
A living scorpion Ls dropped into a wide
necked glass bottle, which contains a few
drops of olive oil of the finest quality.
More oil is toured on instantly, until the
bottle is filled and the scorpion dead. In
its struggles to free itself it ejects all its
poison into the oil, and this poisoned oil
forms a sovereign remedy for the sting of
a scorpion. There is no doubt as to its
efficacy, and it is probably a remedy which
homeopathists would approve of on very
rational grounds. London Society,
The Terror of the Meadow.
Mama When poor Christian was walk
ing through this rally he met a horrible
monster with great glaring eyes like coals
of fire, and the monster had a voice like
rolling thunder, and he breathed smoke
tmcl flame from his terrible notl'us. Who
was it? Irnia, who szhi last summer in
the country Oh, Thaina, I know! A cow!
Burdette p Brooklyn Eagle.
There is only one linen mill now In
pefatioti in the United States, ad it is
making only the coirsest kind of crash
toweling.
Bucklen s Arnica Salve
The Best Salve in tho world for
Cuts, Bruisc3, Sores, Ulcers, Salt
Rheum, Fever Sores, Tetter, Chapped
Hands, Chilblains, Corns, and all Skin
Eruptions, and positively cures Piles,
or no pay required. It is guaranteed
to give perfect satisfaction, or money
refunded Price 2o cts i box.
Fr stleuy Marsters & Co
H A S U1XGTOX LKITE JJJ
Washington, Nov. 23, 1886.
Yesterday was the day of ex-President
Arthur's funeral, and all of the
Executive Departments were closed
and tbe clerks bad holiday. The Uni-
ted States "Supreme Court adjourned
from Friday until Tuesday for the same
reason. All of the public buildingB
in "Washington are draped in black for
the dea l ex President and flags are
displayed at half mast. President Cle
veland aud Congress was represented
by a committea of Senators and Repre
sentatives.
&iSce ilw black dratiHiw Lave been
Luug on tbo front portico of the White
House, the President and Mrs. Cleve
land take their carriage at the south
entrance when they go out for a drive.
and all the projected gnyeties at the
Executive Mansion will bo postponed
for the thirty days of mourning. Then
the black bounthig will bo taken down
and folded up and laid away to do ser
vice again at the death of the next high
official or cx-officia! of the Govern
ment, and the gay social season will
besin.
The cus'om of shutting down on pub
lic work, and turning fifteen thousand
employes loose whenever a President,
ex-President, a' Cabinet officer or ex-
Cabinet officer happens to die, is a
questionable way of showing resecttO
the distinguished dead. It is a pic-nic
for the clerks and a time for congratu.
lation and they would be glad to multi
ply by a hundred fold the occasions of
public sorrow that ive them a day off
and out. Theie is no doubt that the
custom would bo more honored in ths
breach than iu the observance but il is
one of those tlat.gs that a long line of
precedent has establisted and it would
be difficult to decide where or with
whose demise it should end.
President Cleveland has ben much
aispicaseu at ellorts to get. Lim to in
.1 . M . .
terfere in the new widely, discussed
Washington Police scandal. He does
not feel, in the present condition of
aflairs, that he would be warranted in
taking hold of the matter, although
tlie titao may come when he may be
called upon to take some action. The
President is 1ppiW ntuuivVicl wSti.
I J 1VII 1,
t'.vi'uiauuu ui-.,iih- iueFsage,--arra a(
though he is subjected to some un
avoidable interruptions, the approaches
to him are closely guarded.
The Presidant'3 appointment of Mr.
Fulton as Paymaster General of the
Navy was very gratifying to naval
officers and his appointment of Col.
Moore as Surgeon General of the''
Army was received with satisfaction
among officers of the array.
Tito regular Army officers who haye
1., : 11 .
v;ii .-..iiiiiiiiii!7 inn militia nf tho
States and Territories have repotted,
commending the efficiency of the re
spective organizations. They think,
however, that the armed militia of the
country would be doubled if Congress
would appropriate annually a much
larger sum to bo distributed anions tbe
States for improved arms and ac
coutrements. In the latter case it is
estimated that the militia would con
sist of 300,000 well drilled men, who
could be called into active service at a
moment's notice, and who woidd be
almost as effective at the outset of a
war, as tho regular Army.
Many conventions and associations
more than ever before want to
come to Washington during the next
year. The National GraDge has de
cided to hold all future meetings of
that order in Washington, and a com
mittee has been appointed to take
measures for the erection of a suitable
building here for its officers m its ses.
sions.
Soon after Congress meets tbero will
b3 a large gathering of notabilities
here to discuss the proposed Exposi.
tion at Washington in 18S9 and 92.
And later there is to be a convention
of an educational character which will
attract a good many people. It will
be in the interest of Federal aid to
common schools and will be composed
t r.i 1 .L
uuuaoiawaiiuu ieniLOIlcs.
It has been proposed that each state-
of the Union shall erect in this city a
handsome building to ba used as a
state "headquarters, and perhaps as a-
residence for tho Senators of the rep
resentative states. The plan, which is
likely to be carried out some time,
would prove a great convenience to
eacu state, auu would add ninch to
tho grandeur of the National Capital.
o Till Then.
Mr. Blaine has shaken the demo
cratic dust of this city from his feet
and is speeding toward Maine. We
fear that his political aspirations were
rather chilled by onr col I "Novem
ber breezes. When a hen can produce
a brood of chickens by Betting on por
celain eggs, in that year New York
will give her majority to Mr. Blaine,