1"HE POET AND THE NATION.
There is a touching phrase in the
poet laureate's last letter to the
London Times which ought to cause
tome twinges of conscience in an
tffiappreciative public "Sdme of us
have from time to time sought to
rouse the slumbering spirit of the
nation by verse." I must admit my
self that I have not the faintest rec
ollection of any appeal that Alfred
has made to my slumbering spirit,
and I can only conclude, with shame,
that my slumber was so deep that
I did not even hear his modest pipe
calling me to the war dance. This
confession applies, so far as I am
concerned, to all the bards who, if
we are to believe the laureate, have
been playing the same tune. The
ay he puts it suggests that the
lumbering public is to blame for
sot having woke up and faced the
music. But it is just possible that
the fault may be with the music or
the musicians. One remembers many
patriotic poets, from Tyrtaeus to
Jtouget de Lisle, who have had no
reason to complain that when they
piped the audience did not dance.
London Truth.
Mexico In London.
"Modern Mexico" announces that
Mexican national exhibition on a
larger scale of importance than any
previous event of the kind is now
purposed to be held at the Crystal
palace, London, from May to Octo
ber of next year. . The directors of
the Crystal palace have extended
an invitation to President Diaz to
authorize and encourage such an ex
hibition in the hope of strengthen-
44-l, . ' T 1. I. ' 1L
two countries and of larsrelv mereas-
ing the commercial, financial and
Other relationships that have begun
to ripen. The invitation was pre
sented by John W. Ryckman, spe
cial commissioner, on behalf of the
Crystal palace, through the British
minister, Mr. Tower, and is now be
4 l ,i i l iv i n
-u6 ueu-u uuei piaoueaiiy
Trip whn o nvmlnhlA tinnr cnan nf
- - j""1- -
the immense structure to Mexico'
and to assume the entire expense
after the exhibits are installed. It
will be distinctively a Mexican
ex
hibition, no other country beinr al
lowed to take part.
Noiseless Clocks.
"How the times change!" says a
writer in the Frankfurter Zeitung.
"In the days of our fathers no de
scription of a homelike, cozy room
was complete without a reference to
the ticking clock. It was this gen
tle sound which emphasized the
quiet of the place. People had no
nerves in those days. Today the
thought of a machine ticking off
the seconds and striking the hours
is a source of worry and distress.
lime is going, but they do not wish
to be reminded of it continually
No clock is better than the ticking
machine. And now to meet the re- j
Juirements of the nervous people a
actory at Schramburg is making a
noiseless clock." In an article on I
the same subject another paper;
ays, "The antinoise craze has made
disagreeable and unendurable some
V. VUW UwlaCO n UltU VT CI V VUUC UiUOlU
to us, and soon we will find a way to
silence the birds and to muffle the '
found of the rustling leaves
i' Game of Trades.
Each player must choose a trade !
ana go mrougn tne motions oi
Working at it. For instance, if he is
a tailor he must pretend to sew or
iron; if a blacksmith to hammer a
bar of iron or shoe a horse. One is
the king, and he, too, chooses a
trade. Every one works away as hard
as he can until the king suddenly
fives up his trade and takes up that
01 some one else.
Then all must !
top except the one whose business
the king has taken, and he must
tart with tho IHnar'a wnrlr Tha
two go on till the king chooses to go
back to his own trade, when all be
gin working again. Any one who
fails to stop or to begin again at
the right time must pay a forfeit.
His Majesty's Knee.
A Norwegian . journal tells the
following story about the crown
irince of Norway. Too much att
ention from those about him made
little Prince Olaf somewhat head
strong and, like most children, in
clined to be a little tyrannical to
ward his playfellows. The other day
he became angry with another little
boy who had placed himself on a
certain chair. "You mustn't sit
there !" he cried. "It's my father's j
place." King Haakon happened to
be present and took the offending j
boy on his own knee by way of .con
eolation. Prince Olaf was angrier
than ever. "You mustn't sit there
either," he insisted. "It's my moth
er's place." Dundee Advertiser.
Said It First. '
"Any woman can marry any man
she wants," says Gertrude Atherton
in her new book. Probably this is
as true now as it was when Thack-
eray nrst saia 11, mougn ne pui 11 ;
stronger by saying that she could
4! L 1 11 1 1
ao 11 even wnen nanaicappea wiin agen!
ahnmp. New York Sun.,
a ?1 . 1 'it
THE UNTAMED NEW YORKER.
A German newspaper with a large
circulation publishes at regular in
tervals little articles "from Amer
ica which are probably read with
much interest abroad, where it is
not generally known that they are
misleading. One of them, published
a few weeks ago, tells about safe de
posit vaults. "It should be under
stood," the correspondent says,
"that despite the high civilization
as seen here in science, art, com
merce and philanthropy there is still
a certain wildness about the people
which makes the rich man fear the
plunderer. It is on that account
than one can find these safe deposit
vaults in all parts of New York
city, and there people take their val
uables when they do not require
them for public show. In the opera
season one may see long lines of
carriages and automobiles in front
of the strong box places early in
the evening, when the women call
for their jewels, and again after the
opera, the theaters and the balls
are over, when they return them to
the burglar proof boxes. Diamonds,
amethysts and sapphires made of
glass are also deposited in these:
places and taken out when others
can see the operation by women who
court recognition in the circles
where jewelry is a badge of superi
ority." The Pepper Cur For Hiccough.
A new and immediate remedy for
hiccoughs was discovered at the
Hahnemann hospital recently by
Dr. Peters, by whom George Mc
Clelland aged thirty years, of 908
Quarry street, was cured of hic-
. i , ? J
fore by a pinch of pepper.
McClellan had tried all kinds of
remedies before coming to the hos
pital, but without avail. Two hos
pitals were visited, but the treat
ment he received was apparently as
little good as the drugs he had tak
en at home. ' He became weaker and
weakej. flnd could t t or gj
. ... .
It was in this condition that he
appeared at the Hahnemann hos
pital.1 - j
"Here is something that you nev-!
er tried," said Dr. Peters. He gave
the man a pinch of pepper. The,
man was hiccoughing violently at
the time, but managed to inhale the
stimulant. Tears came from his
eyes as he did, and he sneezed- vio
lently. He sneered again, and when
he was through sneezing .the hic
coughs were
Inquirer.
gone. Philadelphia
The Montreal Gurgle.
"Stuyvesant Fish," said a Pitts
burg banker, "is a very finicky per-,
son. To get along with him you ,
must be mighty particular about!
Afinnoffo "Vmi mnot oViva Tiria o !
I v (iiu uvvvvi -a- u u.s v uiiu vs ttn
day, dress for dinner all that sort
of thing. If you don't come up to
his standard, he is apt to say some
very cutting things about you.
"I once sat beside Mr. Fish at a
dinner at the Union league in New
York. Mr. Fish when the soup
came on began to cast sneering
glances at a stout, red faced chap
opposite us, and finally he whisper
ed to me :
can tell it by his accent
"By his accent P said I. 'But,
Mr. Fish, the man hasn t spoken.
f ui 8mjie
"Jlr, Fish's lip curled in a scorn-
'"I had reference,' he said, 'to
the
accent with which he eats his
soup.'" Spokane Review.
A Long Distance Telegram.
Sir Robert Ball, the famous as
tronomer, in talking about the dis
tance of the stars once said that a
telegrams over the wire would take
Beventy-eigni years to reacn tne
most distant star that the telescope-
enables us to see. But the camera
has revealed stars that the telescope
has not, and some ox them are so
distant that if a telegram had been :
sent to them m the year 1 that is ,
to say, 1907 years ago it would
only now be reaching its destina
tion. Only by some such illustra
tion as this can we form any concep
tion of how far away the fixed stars
are. Chicago News.
Riddles and Answers.
Why is a horse like the letter O?
Because G(ee) makes it "Go."
What two letters do boys delight
in? T(w)oTs.
On which side of the pitcher is
the handle ? The outside.
Why is a proud girl like a music
book ? She is full of airs.
Why is the letter F like a fish
hook ? Because it makes eel feel.
Philadelphia Ledger.
Newspaper Slips.
Recent journalistic slips are fun
ny. Seventy per cent of the Hun
garian population are forced to live
in one room, according to the MaiL
A roomy room! In its obituary of
Lord Brampton the Lincolnshire
Echo savs there is hardly a race
horse in the Kngiom on which his
W1i tl,nw fiJL v v
figure has
sLondon Opinion.
ALL OVER THE HOUSE.
Value of Fu Mar's Earth as a Clmraer
of Delicate Fabric Notes.
One of the most valuable cleans
ers for delicate fabrics is fuller'i
earth, and yet comparatively, few
women use it or know about it. It
cheapness and the ease with which
it is applied and removed should
commend it to all, and then, too, it
is quite safe.
For cleaning white and the deli
cate pastel tints as well as other
colors it may be applied with a vel
vet covered brush or pad or a piece
of old and soft Turkish toweling.
Whichever is used, it should be dip
ped in the earth and the material
rubbed, taking care to rub with the-
nap of the goods in the case 01
broadcloth and satin ot other fab-
ric having a decided nap. For broad -
cloth a stiff nne nesh brush will be
found excellent.
Straw hats intended for use an
other season or to serve as stop gaps
between the laying aside of one's
winter hat3 and the new spring cre
ations should be brushed with full
er's earth and a fine, rather stiff
scrub brush. If one have any skill .
at applying trimmings, these should
also be removed and cleansed and
put away with the hat in. a dust
proof paper bag or. a trunk or box
until required.
Oftentimes the lace and velvet or
ribbon used on one hat serves to
trim another. Such trimmings -should
be removed-as -soon is the
hat is done with, carefully' cleaned
and laid aside.
Turning Cider Into. Vinegar. ,
This is my way . of turning old
cider into vinegar, writes a corre
spondent of the Housekeeper : If
there is any honey left on the plate
after a meal, rinse off carefully with
pure water and pour into the cider
barrel, or pieces of comb honey may
be crushed and used. It will not be
many weeks before you will have an
excellent quality of vinegar even if
the cider is two or three years old.
This practice has been followed in
my family for years and always with
the best results.
;
" . Mint Vinegar.
It is always desirable to have
fresh mint sauce to serve with roast
lamb, but when this cannot be ob
tained it is a good thing to have a
substitute on hand. This can 'be
prepared by putting fresh mint
leaves into a wide mouthed bottle
and pouring pure eider vinegar over
them, irill the bottle with the vin
egar, cork tightly and allow it to
stand for two weeks.' After that
strain the liquid into a clean bottle
and seal until ready for use. '
Papier Mache Trays.
Papier mache trays should never
.be allowed to remain wet from tea,
water or milk spilled on them. Wash
, them with a 6ponge, not too wet,
I and cold water. While still damp
sprinkle a little flour over, then rub
with a soft flannel and polish with
a chamois leather. -
White heat marks may be partial
ly removed from papier mache trays
by rubbing with a flannel dipped in
6weet oil and afterward lightly in
epirits of wine.
Cleansing Brushes.
To clean hairbrushes nut one-
half teaspoonf ul of pulverized borax
in a saucer or deep plate, irour on
a sufficient amount of hot water to
wet the bristles of the brush. Let
cool and put in the brush, taking
care not to wet the outside of the
hack. When clean shake well and
let lie in the sun until dry. This
method will leave the bristles stiff.
Fer the Rug by the Door.
To keep a rug in place in front of
a door sew a brass ring on each up
per corner of the rug. Put a brass
headed tack close to the edge of
the floor, hook the brass rings over
the tacks and the rug will not sup
or turn up when opening or closing
the door.
Inexpensive Furniture Palish. .
Equal parts of turpentine, boiled
linseed oil and common household
vinegar make an inexpensive and
excellent furniture polish. The vin
egar and oil combine to make an
emulsion which eradicates smoke
and dirt.
Ivory Handled Knives.
Knives which have ivory handles
which have become darkened should
have the handles rubbed with hall
a lemon which has been dipped in
salt. After treating them thus wash
in warm water.
For a Troublesome Felon.
Take common rock salt, dry in an
(Oven, then pound it fine and rni?
with spirits of turpentine in equal
parts. Put it in a rag and wrap it
around the part affected. As it gets
dry put on more..
i To Restore Colors.
When the color is taken fron
dresses by lemon, pieplant or toma
to juice sponge the spot with aqu
ammonia, then wash in warm soap
suds. .
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
Story of an Irish Coal Minor Who Fell
Down a Shaft.
- That very prominent pessimist
James J. Hill, the Schopenhauer of
American finance, after remarking
the need 01 a strong, calm hand to
guide us and making incidentally
the movement a card player makes
when he holds a straight flush, con
soles Wall street with the assurance
that he does not see how stocks can
go mucn lower. . us opinion was
the occasion the other day for a va
riety of comment in speculative cir
cles. James E. Keene said it reminded
him of the Irish coal miner who fell
own the shaft. Pat had a curious
experience. The. shaft
was a new
one about seventy-five feet deep,
, wnen the Irishman tumbled in
t i. a n v,A whi- disnn im.
mediately. He lodged about a third
of the way down, and his fellow
workmen struggled to save him, Pat
directing the operations. Just as
they thought they had succeeded he
crashed down another twenty-five
feet, when an obstruction caught
him, and the rescue campaign was
begun anew, and with greater diffi
culty. When they were a second
time on the point of success, to the
dismay of the rescuing party, Pat
went headlong into the lower deep.
Now all. was silent no sound from
the unfortunate Hibernian.
: Leaning far over the edge of the
shaft, the" foreman shouted through
a trumpet: 'Tat! I say, Patrick!"
From- the darkness and mystery
of the underworld came the solitary
word, "Hurroo !"
"Are you much hurted, Pat V
-'"I am not, begorra!"'
' "Where are ye, Pat?"
. ''That's that ye'resayin'?"
"Where are ye, Pat? Where the
divil are ye ?" '
"Where am I? Where am I?,
Glory be to God, I'm on the bottom
at lasht !" New York Commercial.
After the Wedding.
He Our house, dear Anna, is
certainly very cozy, but rather small.
If your mother should want to come
and stay with us, therefore er
er
She You will have to sleep out
somewhere.
On the Anxious Bench.
- "You seem very nervous and rest
less this morning," said the senior
partner.
"Yes," replied Markley, 4he jun
ior partner. "You see, I asked Bor
roughs to drop in today and pay me
what he owes me."
"And you're afraid he won't
come, eh ?"
"I'm afraid he will come and bor
row more." Catholic Standard and
Times.
A Treasure Ship.
Silas Stubble I see that eVry
time thet new ship sails- the Lucy
Tanner I think's her name she
carries 7,500 tons uv coal
Hank Harkins By ginger! It's
a dura good thing there ain't no
piruts a-rovin' the seas these days!
Puck.
A Good Guess.
Yeast What would happen if
some people could take money with
them into the next world, do you
suppose P
Crimsonbeak Why, it would
burn in their pockets. Yonkers
Statesman.
Reciprocity.
"Every father thinks he has the
finest baby in the world."
"Yes," answered the cynic, "and
once in awhile, but not nearly so
often, a baby grows up to think it
has one of the finest fathers in the!
world." Houston Post.
Too Big a Risk.
"How was it that old Jake did
not make some provision for his
family in the way of insurance ?"
"Rates too high. You see, he was
a guide in Maine for amateur hunt
ers." Baltimore American.
A Cook's Idea.
Husband That new cook must
be awfully extravagant.
Wif e Why do you think so ?
Husband -She seems to think we
have victuals to burn. Detroit
Tribune.
Paradoxical.
The Drummer The price of
writing paper has gone up.
The Merchant Why, t always
thought it was stationery. .-Chiea-
go News. ,1
WATCH YCUn TCNCUZ.
If Furred and Coated, It Is
Warning of Trouble to Come.
When it is the morning after the night
before, von do not have to look at yoor I
uuiKue to ennw that tbeetonauh is upset,
the head is aching with a dull rhythm,
and that all the world looks black and
dreary.
It may have been lobster Newburgh,
Welsh rarebit or some otter tasty dish
that looked much better t night than
the morning after. There is no need to
lciok at the toague thermometer then for
symptoms of trouble. You naturally go
to yoor box of Mi o- na stomach tablets,
and with one of the little relievers bring
joy and gladness to the physical system.
The real time to watch the tongue is ali
of the time. If it is coated with a white
for, or possibly with dark trimmings, even
though the stomach does not tell yon by
the acute pains of indigestion that it
needs help, yet the coating shows that
you are getting into a bad way and that
there is need of Mi-o-na.
Mi-o-na is bo positive, bo sore, so reli
able in its carative action upon the stom
ach that Graham & Wells, the local
agents,' give an absolute guarantee with
everv 50-cent box they sell to refond the
money unless the remedy gives absolute
and complete satisfaction. .
Why
Should voar baby suffer? . When he is
fretful and restless, don't experiment on
him and use any old thing your meichbor
recommends. Boy a bottle of White's
Cream Vermifuge, greatest known worm
medicine ana cure for all children's dis
eases. It is mild in its action, builds up
the system, makes thin pony babies fat
rara. j. j. omicn, Tamps, la., writes:
"My baby wss thin and sickly, could not
retain its food and ' cried all night. I
need one bottle of White's Cream Vermi
fuge and in a few days baby was latieh-
ing happy and well." Sold hy Graham
& Wortham.
Carrie Nation
Certainly smashed a hole in the Dar
100ms of KaDSae, but Ballard's Hore
bound Syrup has smashed all records as
a cure for coughs. Bronchitis, Influenza
and all Pulmonary d'seasea. T. C. H ,
Horton, Kansas, writes: "I have-never
'ound a medicine that would cure a
cough bo quickly as Ballard's Horehound
Syrup. I have used it for years." Sold
by Graham & Wortham.
TheJOy
Of living is to have good health. Use
Herbine and you will have bushels of
jo-. - You need not be bine, fretful and
have that bad taste in your mouth. Try
a bottle of Herbine, a positive cure for
tall liver complaints. . Harrell, Austin,
Texas, writes: "I have used Herbine for
over a year, and find it a fine regulator.
I gladly recommend it as a fine medicine
for Dyspepsia." Sold by Graham &
Wortham.
neir Brand of Language. "
"When George Ade wintered in
Egypt," said a Baltimorean, "it
amused him a good deal to see the
serious way in which his fellow
tourists took their smattering of
the Arabic tongue. They had pick
ed up all this flimsy knowledge in a
week or two's reading, but they act
ed as though it was the precious
fruit of a lifetime's study. At As
souan a young woman from St. Jo
seph complained that she could not
understand the Arabic of her guide.
To the crowd that encircled her she
pointed out the guide a bent old
fellow with a white beard and she
said bitterly that after her thor
ough study of Arabic it seemed
strange that she and this guide
could not converse. From the rear
of the crowd Mr. Ade called grave
ly: It's your own fault, Miss Hod
son. You should , have hired a
younger guide. These toothless old
ones all speak gum Arabic' "
Competent.
"Examinations forx admission to
the bar," once observed a prominent
attorney of New Orleans, "are of
course easy or severe, according to
the humor of the examiner.- I heard
once of a judge in a certain district
famous for its bad roads and nu
merous creeks and rivers who, when
a young man presented himself for
examination, looked the applicant
over and then inquired, with great
gravity:
"Can you ride?"
"Yes, sir." .
"Do you own a horse ?"
"Yes, sir."
"Can he swim?"
"Yes, sir."
"Then, my dear sir, I am happy
to welcome you to the practice of
law- in my district." Harper's
Weekly.
A Starter.
Man in a restaurant, happening
in just as a new shift of waiters
came on. And, having eaten a very
modest luncheon, this man laid
down a modest tip to be exact, 5
cents.
And did the waiter shy or sniff
at this nickel ? He did neither, but,
on the contrary, he seemed to re
gard it as an augury of good for
tune that his first customer should
have given him something, and
"Thank you," he said politely to
the customer, and as he turned
away added to himself, "Thafs
a starter." New York Sun.
I7e Invite
Your
inspection
Stock of
of
Ladies' and Misses'
Coats
Wool Dress Goods, Cotton
Wash Dresb Fabrics
Our Stock is Com.
plete in Every Detail
at Right Prices.
Henkle & Davis
Cr-v
CUSSiriEO ADVERTISEMENTS
CLABBiriKU ADVIRT1BXMXNTS :
Fifteen words or leas, 25 eta for thre
successive insertions, or 50 eta per
month: for all np to and including- tea
additional words. cent a word for each
insertion.
For all advertisements over 3S words,
1 ct per word for the first insertion, and
V ct per wod for eai additional inaer-
Hon. Nothine inserted for less than 28
wit.
Lodsre. society and church nntfoM,
other than sMotlv news matter, will he
Rharsred for.
PHYSICIANS
T. A.OATTTFY. W. TV PTTVSTPTAK
onrtiKwon. ttmra14. PptiV PritM.
OflK" Four,; 10 tn T IP . fo
mo Q. TelfT'frovl' fff-o nr1 rw.
Monon fWvp'Un. Orawsi.
W. T. ROWLEY. M. V.. PHYSTCTAN
pnd PiirpoT'. ppprial o'tpntinn pivpn
tn m "Rv. Vopp flr Thront. OflV
in .Tohnonn Wii. Tntf. 'phnne at of.
House Decoratina.
FOP. PATNTTNO A VT PAPERING
W. K. Pml. Iid. 4S 4U
UNDERTAKERS
WILKTNS& BOVFE. FUNERAL DI
roMors and Lioepoed Fmhlm'.
Sncrepsern o S. N. Wilkins, CorvslMf,
Oregon. Phone 45. 89tf
HENKLE ft PL AC KLFPOF. TJNTVFR
eltArs end Hoptp"' em halm ere. South
Main St., Corvsllis, Or.
ATTORN FYS
J. F. YATEP. ATTORNFY-AT-LAW.
Oflire no etafm in ZieoJf BniMinc
Only eet of abstracts in Benton Conntv
E. P-. BRYflON ATTORNEY AT LAW.
OfTp In Post Office Bnildine:. Oorval
lia, Oregon.
WANTED
WANTED BOO SUBSCRIBERS TO THE,,
Gaxkttx and Weekly Oregonian tt
$2.50 per year.
,a
HOMES FOR SALE
WILL SELL LOTS IN OOBVALLI8,
Oregon, on instalment plan andaa.
fat pnrchaserB U bnild home nn thenv
if desired. Address First National
Bank, Corvallis, Or.
WILL SELL MY LOTS IN NEWPORT.
Or., for spot cash, balance install
menU, and help parties to bnild home
thereon, if desired. Address M. 8.
Woodcock. Co-valli. Or.
BANKING.
THE FIRST NATIONAL BANK OF
Corvallis, Oregon, transacts a general'
conservative banking business. Loan
money on approved security. Drafts
bought and sold and money transferred'
to the principal cities of the United'
States, Europe and foreign countries.
The
for Job Work..
CASTOR I A
For Infants and Children.
The Kind You Have Always Bought
Signatveaf