JUST A LITTLE BIT OF BABY
Just a little bit of baby.
Twenty pounds and nothing more;
See him floor bis giant daddy.
Weight two hundred, six feet four.
Jost a little bit of baby;
And beauty? Not a trace;
See him stealing all the roses
From his lovely mother's face.
Just a little bit of baby;
Ignorant as he ran be;
See him puzzle all the sages
Of his learned family.
Jost a little bit of baby;
Walking? No. nor crawling, even;
See him lead a dozen grown-ups
To the very gate of heaven!
Good Housekeeping.
ARRY, I can sum up your case
In three words," said Lancaster.
"The fact is and you cannot de
ny It you're In love:"
Ellington started.
"How on earth did you find that
out?" he ni uttered.
"Experience and casual observation."
replied Lancaster, shortly. "By the
way, I saw Milly Holsworth to-day.
Then, with a grin, "I'm, I thought I
wasn't far out. She's a nice girl, Har
ry, and a clever one. Women nowa
days who are good looking and, can
earn their own living are iu great de
mand In the matrimonial market, so
I'm told, and I can quite believe It."
"Yes, groaned Ellington, "but when
a man lias only a paltry twelve nun
drcd and fifty a year the Idea of cr
or even proposing to a lady who can
buy him up might give rise to unpleas
ant comments h'm"'
"Personally, I should try my luck,
'Faint heart, etc., you know. You nev
er know what may transpire. Say you
decide to see bow absence might af
fect the case and to wait till your re
turn to England. She might be snapped
up in the meantime. Perhaps the
steamer might founder, and and
"Don't, Lancaster, don't!" shuddered
Ellington. "Your advice, old chap, 1
fear has not advanced the improve
ment of the outlook at all."
"Then the only course that remains
"HE KESOLVIID TO TRY AUNT MEG.
open for you Is to consult Aunt Meg,"
sighed Lancaster.
"Aunt Meg! Who Is she? And what's
she got to do with It?"
"Aunt Meg is a lady connected with
a popular publication entitled The
Daisy, whose official duty it Is to re
ceive and reply to, through the col
umns of the aforesaid Journal, all ques
tions that may be submitted to her no
tice on the all-important theme of love
and its attendant trials, misunder
standings and vagaries in general."
"Consult Aunt Meg!" the words
seemed to ring In Ellington's ears for
some time after the departure of his
friend Lancaster.
"A precious fool I'd be thought," he
mused, "supposing I was Idiot enough
to trust my private affairs to the ten
der mercies of a modern lady journal
ist, if the story leaked out. Certainly
one might write under a nom de plume
or initials, but then I don't believe In
such rot."
Half an hour's meditation, however,
served to put matters before him In a
different light. He reflected that the
journal in question bore a very high
character, and he resolved to try Aunt
Meg.
After due destruction of various
sheets of note paper, his communica
tion was at last fairly neatly trans
cribed and ran as follows:
To "Aunt Meg." Daisy Offices. 420 Fleet
street, K. 0.:
Madam I trust you may be able to
successfully advise me as to my actions
in the following matter: To be brief, I
am aged thirty and am in reecipt of an
mum jil income of twelve hundred and fif
ty dollars as private secretary to a titled
gentleman, who is to depart on a voy
age of indefinite duration in three weeks'
time for his health's sake, and I am to
accompany him. A mouth ago I made
the acquaintance of a charming lady
about my own age, and we have met at
various intervals since.
As you will already have surmised, 1
am deeply iu love with her, though 1
have not as yet declared my passion. As
far as I am aware, from the statement
of a friend, she is in receipt of an in
come exceeding mine by two hundred
and fifty dollars per annum, derived from
her employment, the exact nature of
which, however, owiug to the shortness
of our acquaintance. 1 am unfortunate
ly iu ignorance of. beyond that it is some
thing in a city otlice.
I have every reason to believe that my
attentions, such as they have been, are
not altogether distasteful. What would
you advise me to do? Ask her now and
risk a slender income, or wait till I am
In more allluent circumstances, which
chance is slightly remote at the present
outlook? II. A. E.
Two Saturdays passed and left him
In the deepest depths of despair, owing
to the non-appearance of a reply to his
communication.
In the meantime he met Mildred
Holsworth on two occasions at the
house of a mutual acquaintance and
once was almost on the verge of a de
claration, but checked himself In time
to save making himself an arrant ass,
as he termed It.
It was with feverish excitement that
he opened the last issue of The Daisy
published before he left England. Eag
erly he scanned the page sacredly set
apart for the benefit of "Aunt M?g"
aud her amorous amblings.
Yes. it was there at last!
H. A. E. Waste no t"me. but go and
Ask her at once, if 1 jud.'e rightly from j
HOW EVERYBODY
If 5i
4circBU K triK-ox.rTU vwx v t i n
DEVICE BY WHICH ANYEODY MAY SEND A TELEGRAM.
Martin Armstrong, station agent on the Gulf. Colorado and Santa Fe road at
Kenny, Texas, has invented an appliance by which any person may send a tele
graphic message without knowing anything about telegraphy. The apparatus is
intended primarily for use in educating people to be telegraphers, and with it they
can without a teacher, master the secret of dots and dashes that go to make
up each letter of the alphabet according to the Morse system.
The outfit, which can be carried in the hand, consists of a sounder key, such,
as is nsed in all telegraphic work, a small dry battery, a transmitter, stylus, and
the wires that connect the various parts. It is the transmitter that is the won
derful thing about the whole apparatus. This is simply a piece of wood about
twelve inches long and eight wide. Extending along one side of the board are
all the letters of the alphabet, followed by the numerals 1 to 0, and the
punctuation characters. Under each one of these characters there is a little
hole or- depression in the wood. Below these holes again there is a- geometri
cal pattern formed by strips of metal set into the wood, with a minute groove
leading from each character through the metal strips, and the wood that at
intervals breaks their continuity.
The stylus, which looks like an ordinary pencil, and all the other parts of the
apparatus are connected with th- battery by wires. The novice sets the appara
tus on a table before him and takes the htylns in his hand. Inserting its point in
the groove running from the letter he wishes to make he draws it toward him.
As It moves the sounder clicks the letter. This is done by the stylus passing
over the metal strips and forming an electrical connection, which is broken for
longer or shorter intervals necessary to make a letter by the intervening spaces of
wrd between the metal strips. A few weeks of practice on this instrument
and the novice knows the sound of every letter, and it is only then a matter
of practice to receive and trausmit in the usual manner. The sounder gives him
his opportunity to practice this, and if he is ever in doubt as to his correctness
he can verify his work by producing the letter with the stylus.
Telegraphers say it is the most ingenious as well as the simplest arrangemehT
they ever saw by means of which to learn telegraphy. Railroad men who have
looked at it value it from another standpoint. One general manager of a railway
says it will prove of great value in railroad work. By having one on every
train. In case of a wreck the conductor will be enabled, by throwing,- wire over
the telegraph wires along the road, to at once communicate with the train dis
patcher of the division, telling where he is. and the nature of the casualty. The
conductor need not know anything about telegraphy to transmit a message
slowly, but with perfect accuracy.
the tone of your letter, you need scarce
ly have any apprehension as to the na
ture of her reply. As to monetary mat
ters, a girl who cannot comfortably man
age and be happy on the united income
doesn't deserve a husband at all.
It was all over. The last slipper bad
sped Its course in the air and disap
peared through the window of the
compartments which had the hoonr of
accommodating the happy couple, and
the last handful of rice lay whitening
the platform like a miniature fall oi
snow.
"I'm so glad it's all over at last,"
sighed Mildred Ellington as she threw
herself wearily back among the cush
ions. "But the whole affair was a
complete success and went off without
a flaw."
"Yes, darling, quite complete, except
for the absence frui the ceremony of
one to whom I owe a great deal of my
present happiness in fact one of your
sister stragglers in the field of litera
ture. Milly, I've a confession to make.
I know you'll think I'm au awful fool.
and perhaps be angry, but promise uie,
Milly, beforehand that you will forgive
me."
"I'd promise you anything, Harry. It
it can't be anything dreadful, I in
sure, raitenngiy.
"Then read that and put me out of
my misery.
And taking from his inside breast
pocket a copy of The Daisy containing
Aunt Meg's advice, which he had so
successfully acted upon, he opened it at
the fatal page and handed it to her.
"Harry," she said quietly, pushing it
away, her eyes filling with tears the
while, "I I know what you mean now.
She she was there, and and you saw
her."
"I saw her, Milly?" ejaculated El
lington, utterly taken aback by her
answer.
'Yes, Harry, and you see her now!
1 was Aunt Meg at the- time, and
knowing whom your question concern
ed replied accordingly. I. too, meant
to confess all to-day. and you have
TO MAKE A SWELL HAT AT A SMALL COST.
A swell hat, made after an exclusive imported model, is within the scop
of any girl with nimble fingers. The most rudimentary knowledge of sewing
only is required. One needs not know even the first principles of millinery. By
the expenditure of $1.25 in cash, a little patience and about three hours' labor,
this seeming miracle can be wrought. The following is the manner of its per
formance: Two yards of chiffon or mousseline de soie in any becoming shade may be had
at 40 cents per yard. Sometimes it can be purchased as low as 29 cents at
special sale, but in that case it is more apt to be tumbled an shop worn. So
the best economy is to purchase the fresh, crisp goods, as a great deal of the
effect depends upon the dainty appearance of the hat when finished. Thereore
$1 should be allowed for the material. A buckram frame at 19 cents, one spool
of mercerized cotton at 6 cents completes the list of moneys expended. Now
conies the skill, patience and other necessaries in the building of the Paais hat.
Cut the chiffon into lengthwise strips, about an inch la width. Turn in the
edges neatly, and join them with what Is known as a "blind stitch." Yon
have then a number of long bands. Braid three together, after the maimer in
which you plait your hair, and then, sew the braided band round and round
upon the frame until it is completely covened. The short "streamers" in the back
are made of chiffon about three inches in width and four and six inches in
length. They are trimmed ail about the edges with the braid work, and the
same idea is carried out in the "pompons" which are used for the front of the
hat. This effect is obtained by double box pleating goods, finished off similarly
to the floating ends in the back.
Another very pretty style is to make- loops of the braided chiffon, doubling
the ends and forming rosettes. One can vary the color. All white, pale blue,
rose or salmon tints would make beautiful "Summer girl" chapeaux. or white
with black choux, or reverse, for black and white has renewed its perenfcial hold
upon feminine hearts in millinery as well as costumes.
Orowns and brims may be of contra sting colors or may match, and the same
holds good with the trimming used. If o-e wishes to go beyond the S& limit
flowers or wings may be added, but fefy desirable results can be secured- by the
use of the chiffon only.
MAY TELEGRAPH.
made It easier for me to do so. Kiss
tue, Harry, and say you forgive iue."
Waverley.
Dogs as Life Guards.
In a short time, says the European
correspondent of the Baltimore Ameri
can, quite a number of Newfoundland
dogs will be adde8 to the corps of offi
cers who patrol the Seine as life
guards. The dogs are young, magnifi
cent fellows, and have been in special
training for some months. Their edu
cation has been carried on in an indoor
bath built for the purpose, a u"d recently
several exhibitions have been g'ven be
fore members of the municipal board
of police for the purpose of demon
strating the dogs' fitness for their work
of rescue. Iu the early spring when
the dogs take their places -among the
ranks of gallant rescuers, kennels will
be built for them at intervals along
the river. The work of education will
then be carried on regularly, the dogs
being taken through their paces just
as the horses of the fire department
are exercised every day. In the recent
exhibitions these noble animals show
ed themselves splendidly qualified for
their work by their quickness, their
powers of endurance when attacked by
would-be suicides and their power to
sustain for a considerable time tile
weight of a human body.
Many Varieties of Kice.
More than twenty varieties of rice
are known in the Philippines; but,
though this cereal Is so important to
the natives, not enough of it is pro
duced to supply their needs, and large
quantities have to be imported an
nually. Undoubtedly.
"That's a novel occupation," ejacu
lated Mr. Dinsmore, looking up from
his paper.
"What is?" asked Mrs. Dinsmore.
"Writing fiction."
The industrious man likes those with
whom he works better than those he
meets In "society."
ii
BO NOT BEAD DICKENS
FEW YOUNG PEOPLE KNOW HIS
FAMOUS CHARACTERS.
Expensive Illustrated Edition of His
Novels Are Still Frequently Called
For, but Cheap Editions, Which Be
token Popularity, a Drug: on Market.
"The sale of the works of Dickens
has been gradually but surely dimin
ishing during the last ten or fifteen
years." said a book dealer. "The fine
ly bound editions are, of course, still
in fair demand by persons engaged la
assembling libraries of their own, but
the cheap, popular editions have for
some years been more or less of a drug
on the market. The young people,
even those who are omnivorous readers
of fiction, scarcely ever ask for a book
of Dickens. "
"I re-read two or three of Dickens'
books every year for the fun of the
thing, and I know of plenty old fogies
of my age who do the same. The
young people who fail to familiarize
themselves with Dickens deprive them
selves of a lot of diversion. The Dick
ens characters are around us every
where. There are very few odd or
quaint eccentricities of human beings
that Dickens didn't touch upon, and
one who has these characters In the
works of Dickens stored away in his
mind scarcely ever gets through a day
that he doesn't meet up with some
body or other in the flesh who recalls
some corresponding or similar type in
Dickens. Who, for instance, doesn't
know any number of Micawbers, who,
like the original of the species, are al
ways waiting for something to turn
up? Haven't we all been thrown into
contact with numerous Dick Swlvel
lers? Hasn't every one of us with any
experience in the game of life met and
loathed at least one Pecksniff? Haven't
we all been imposed upon and bored
by a Chadband?
"And yet, if you mention the name
of one of these wonderfully portrayed
characters of Dickens in the presence
of a roomful of young people of to-day
it is 5 to 1 that they will stare at you
and wonder what you are driving at.
Just try it on and see if I am not
right I'll Just mention an example
of this. My sister-in-law, a quiet, el
derly woman, was humorously describ
ing at dinner a few evenings ago the
garrulousness of a trained nurse whom
she had employed a short time before.
There were eight young men and wom
en, their ages ranging from 18 to 22.
and all of them considered pretty well
educated for their years, at the table.
" 'That nurse must have been Salrey
Gamp reincarnated,' said my sister-in-law,
In concluding her narration.
"Well, the middle-aged and elderly
folk at the table all chuckled at the
comparison, of course, but every one of
those eight young people looked blank
ly at my sister-in-law, plainly wonder
ing what in the world she meant.
" 'Who was Sarah Gamp?' finally
nsked one of the youngwomen.
"My sister-in-law, realizing the utter
hopelessness of endeavoring to draw a
proper portrayal of Sarah Gamp for
the benefit of persons who had never
become acquainted with that amiable
character, was forced to recommend
the young woman to read 'Martin
Chuzzlewit.' The young woman sol
emnly made a note of it, and she got
ihe book from me the next day, con
fessing that she had never read a soli
tary work of Dickens from cover to
over. She found Dickens so dull, she
said! And I have heard many young
people of the present generation say
the same thing that Dickens seemed
stupid and prosy to them. How they
can say such a thing, much less expe
rience the feeling, is quite beyond me.
"Thackeray, too, perhaps a keener,
if less mellow, writer of fiction than
Dickens, is sadly neglected these days.
There is little or no call for his books.
The uprising generation seem to have
no interest whatever in Thackeray.
They all know about Becky Sharpe be
cause a play written about that demi
rep has been produced in recent years,
but they appear to know no more
about Arthur Pendennis, or Capt. Cos
tigan or Barry Lyndon, or even Henry
Esmond, than they do about the char
acters in the mystery plays of the mid
dle ages.
"If the young people were to devote
themselves as assiduously to Dickens
and Thackeray as they do to the bal
derdash which seems to form their
mental staple," concluded the book
dealer, according to the Washington
Star, "they would develop into better
men and women for it."
THE BIG FISH THAT HE LOST.
A California Fisherman Declares It
Was a Giant Striped Bass.
John George, a fisherman of Point
San Quentin, Cal., was given a battle
for his life the other day by a giant
fish, which he declared was a striped
bass. The fish overturned his boat and
George would have been drowned had
not help arrived.
George dragged his net for bass near
San Quentin point on a recent morn
ing. When he commenced to haul his
catcfc aboard his heavy salmon boat he
found that he had captured a giant
bass. For more than an hour he club
bed and gaffed the monster, and at last
succeeded in getting a rope through Its
gills. He then started to row his catch
to the wharf.
After he had gone a short distance
the fish revived and In Its desperate
efforts to free Itself the boat was over
turned and its occupant thrown into
the water. Charles Allison, the agent
at San Quentin, saw the fisherman's
peril, and procuring a boat went to the
rescue. George and Allison made every
effort to right the former's boat or tow
it ashore, but owing to the current they
failed, and at Jast were compelled to
cut the floundering fish loos3 in order
to save the boat and nets.
George, who is one of the best-known
fishermen cv. the bay, says the San
Francisco 0. insists that the Im
mense fisJf -.ff a striped bass.
A Tw.-Jjin Tribute.
'The ni'js: touching compliment 1
eTer received," remarked a well-known
soprano, the other cay. "was paid to
me by a poor old woman, who must
Vn.A nmi,:?rt3 . , i - . . . -1 1 . i liantul Vial I
had sung two- solos at the evening
service of a fashionable church, after
which 1 boarded a car. The old wom
an, whose clothes indicated great pov
erty, got In and sat down beside me.
her face fairly shining with pleasure as
she recognized me.
" 'Lady. I want to tell you how I
likes your voice,' she exclaimed in rath
er broken English. 'It goes right to my
heart, and makes me so happy, just as
if I'd heard the angels sing. I thank
you. .
"Of course I thanked her, but the
funny part was when the conductor
came for our fares. The old lady
counted out ten pennies 'before I could
pass over my nickel.
" Two! Twor she said to him, as she
nodded t me. 'I wants to, lady, for I
likes your voice so much; I likes your
voice.
"So, while I felt that perhaps the
poor old soul could ill spare her extra
pennies, I let her make the sacrifice
because of the evident pleasure it gave
her, and no compliment I ever received
has touched me more deeply than her
oft repeated words, 'I likes your
voice. -
THE SINGING VOICE.
The Beat Rules for Keeping; It in Good
Condition.
The greatest choir in the world is
said (and we believe with truth) to be
that attached to a monastery at St.
Petersburg, erected in honor of Alex
ander Nevskl, patron saint of Russia.
It consists of about thirty monks, cho
sen from the best voices in all the Rus
sian monasteries. It is really worth
a journey to St, Petersburg to near
that choir sing.
A contemporary speaking of them
announces that they believe that the
eating of carrots has much to do with
sustaining the strength and sweetness
of their voices. Great singers are of
ten great cranks. A list filling a col
umn might be made of the things
which they have credited with having
a fine effect upon their voices; and the
list would be very contradictory, some
warning others against what 'their
equals have commended. If it be true
that carrots tend to make such sing
ers as these or to Improve voices, there
are many reasons why the fact should
be made known in this country, where
from the climate or other causes voices
are undergoing an unfavorable modifi
cation. Really fine bassos are difficult
to find, and a great musical authority
affirms that tenors are growing scarce.
If this continues predominant voices
will be of the class which a poor, in
norant woman whose husband was a
good singer but very ill-tempered, tried
to describe. Being asked whether his
voice was tenor or bass, she answered:
"He says it Is barytone, but at home
it is bear-i-tone." The best diet for
the voice is tha.t which keeps the di
gestion perfect and all the organs and
muscles employed in respiration unin
cumbered. They Left.
"It does me good to see a smart
Aleck get the worst of It," said the
communicative conductor to the man
on the back platform. "There were
two of them on my car yesterday, and
their game was to scare people Into
thinking that they were just recover
ing from smallpox. They talked loud
ly about It for the benefit of the other
passengers, and the more nervous
ones, especially the women, began to
grow apprehensive.
" 'Yes.' said one, 'my case was a
pretty bad one, the doctors said.'
" 'So was mine,' replied the other
fellow. 'It seems good to get out of
the Municipal Hospital, doesn't it?'
" That's what it does,' said the first
one.
"Sitting next to them was a man
who had been taking it all in. At this
point he leaned over and said:
" 'Say, when did you fellows ' get
out?'
" 'Only yesterday,' loudly remarked
one of the kidders.
" 'Is that so.' exclaimed the man. 'So
did I. What ward were you in?"
"Well, say, those fellows jumped off
the car as though It had been struck
by lightning, and you couldn't see
their heels for dust."
v.-.. .... 1 1
"That Miss Bradish is one of thel&vvlth them. Meanwhile the town mar
most peculiar girls I ever saw. She and
I met In London last winter, and we've
been very good friends ever since until
a couple of weeks ago. "Now she barely
speaks to me. I can't account for It
e were talking one evening about
clever women. We both agreed that tal
ented women are seldom beautiful."
"You probably made some remark
that she didn't like."
'No; I was careful about that, and
she showed no sign of her unaccount
able coldness until I asked her whether,
if she could have her choice, she would
prefer to be talented or beautiful. She
never answered the question, and has
been different toward me ever since.
Most peculiar girl I ever saw!"
Totems and Mascottea.
The totems cherished by some of the
Indian tribes suggest the French mas
cotte. A "totem" Is the generic word
for a class of material objects which
a savage regards with superstitious
awe, under the belief that between him
and every member of the class there
exists an intimate relation. The to
tem may be a wolf, a beaver, a buffa
lo, a salmon a snake, the wind, birch
bark, the leaves of trees, the sun or
the snow. But whatever it happens to
be, the connection between it. and its
protege is mutually beneficial. The to
tem protects the man, and the man
testifies his esteem for his protection
by not killing It should it be an ani
mal, and not destroying it should it
be a plant.
The Plucky Baboon.
One day a German traveler and his
companions while in Abyssinia fell in
with a band of baboons in a valley.
The apes all hurried away before the
travelers, all except a poor sickly crea
ture, which sat upon a rock and howled
and trembled with fear. The dogs of
the travelers made a rush for the spot
but before they could reach It an old
baboon darted down the hillside, pick
ed up its poor companion from under
the very noses of the dogs, whorscatter
ed rather than fight the newcomer, and
carried it off.
Hypocrites pay cream aud live skim
milk.
HI I i l
WHEN THE
CIRCUS GOMES
TO TOWN.
OR three months the huge pos
ters in red and blue Ink have
flamed forth. There Is the
"Blood Sweating Behemoth of Holy
Writ," with an open mouth six feet
square; there Is "Mme, Llsette, Gorg
eous Queen of the Hoops of Fire," clad
in pink tights, leaping through billows
of flame; there is the "Unsurpassed.
Unparalleled, and Unequaled Union of
Unique and Mighty Monsters" leering
out through bars of iron; there are a
hundred other marvels, any one of
which is enough to throw the small
boys into spasms of excitement.
When the first bill goes up they all
begin to make plans for going to the
circus. In divers ways they begin to
get together the money needed for a
ticket. They save rags and old Iron;
they cut lawns; they pick strawber
ries; they chop kindling and carry in
wood. Every penny is saved. To the
children the coming of a circus is the
greatest possible Incentive to industry
and economy. This is a virtue which,
strangely enough, the modest circus
manager has been slow to claim. And
then finally comes the parade which Is
really better than the circus Itself. The
"show-lot" is always on the flats at the
other end of Main street. You get up
at 5 o'clock in the morning and hurry
down to see -the circus "get In" and
unload.
Perhapsjf the fates are kind you get
THE PARADE PASSES
a Heaven-sent chance to carry buckets
of water until your back aches for a
ticket of admission to the show. That
makes you an object of envy to all
your fellows. You stay and watch the
canvasmen drive their pegs, rig their
poles, and build a canvas city while
the ordinary man would be marking
off the site. You see the animals fed
and your eyes stick out like hard boil
ed eggs when a beautiful young wom
an with red cheeks and a short white
lace dress is let into the cage with the
lions.
Finally the crisis comes. From the
far off end of Main street a wild strain
of unearthly music sweeps up the
packed street. It is the steam calliope
In action an instrument which sounds
like a score of tug whistles blowing at
once. At the sound all .the horses In
hearing rear and plunge and their own-
era rush frantically out to wrestle
shal is running down to the street to
have the calliope turned off before the
town is torn to pieces.
Far ahead of the rest of the proces
sion ride two men in a shiny victoria,
drawn by two white and two Jet black
horses, wearing silver mounted har
ness with yellow reins. One of the
men is a quiet looking person in a mod
est suit of black clothes and a black
slouch hat He owns the show, but he
cuts no figure In the eyes of the popu
lace in comparison with the gorgeous
and glittering individual who rides
with him; This latter wears a red
waistcoat with blue polka dots, white
spats, shining patent leathers, and al
most white frock coat and a tall silk
hat, on which the sun plays In splen
dor. His ample paunch is crossed by
an enormous gold chain, which mean
ders also once or twice around his
neck. In his big red necktie shines a
diamond greater and more brilliant
than the Kohinoor.
Twice In each block as he proceeds
in his -triumphal progress up Main
street, this glittering personage rises to
his feet and lifts his silk hat. reveal
ing a bald head as shining as his hat
He opens .bis mouth and out of it
comes a voice like the blast of a trum
pet. "Come one! Come all!" he bellows.
"On behalf of the management 1 am
authorized to announce that immedi
ately before the performance under
the large canvas Mme. Lissette will
perform the unparalleled and stupen
dous feat of dancing the skirt dance
while suspended in midair on a slack
rope stretched between the top of the
wagon factory and the roof of the vin
egar works. Entirely free, gratuitous,
and complimentary. Without money
and without price the' gifted little lady
will disport in mldspace. Come one!
Come all!"
Then he would make a bow and sit
down, while the small boys gasped
with awful admiration and envy.
Then you start on the dead run up
Main street to get the seat in the sec
ond story window over Brown's gro
cery which has been reserved for you.
Already Main street is packed with
people. One row is sitting down on
1H I
1
4.
the curb, with their feet In the gutter.
Behind them stand other rows reach
ing back to the front of the stores and
then climbing to points of vantage on
the tops of dry goods boxes. All the
windows are full, anxious mothers
clutching with nervous bands the
waistbands of small children, who do
their best to fall out into the crowds
below whenever a stray strain of
music comes floating up from the di
rection of the circus lot
If yon have earned a ticket or have
aa extra quarter in your pants' pock
ets you buy a big bag of peanuts, the
shells of which you throw down from
your high perch on to the heads of the
people on the sidewalk. When the
shells strike you turn your eyes away
and look as unconscious as possible.
Now the town marshal emerges from
the crow,d on the other side of the
street, dragging by the collar a young
man who Is denounced as "one of them
city thugs." He starts down the cen
ter of the street with his prisoner, fol
lowed by a street full jt excited men
and boys, to whom an arrest Is as ex
citing as a declaration of war. It Is
the marshal's day to shine. He gets
to within a block of the lockup, under
the engine-house, when a farmer's
team, frightened half to death by the
unusual noise and by the swift ap
proach of the crowd, breaks away
from the hitching post at the curb.
UP MAIN STREET.
stand up on their hind legs, and start
to paw holes in the atmosphere. With
out stopping to think the marshal
drops his hold on his prisoner and
grabs the horses. The pickpocket slips
away to safety, but the horses are
stopped from running away.
A dozen times there are false alarms
that the parade has started. Each
time the crowd along Main street
surges into the street, and up the
street come the huge gilded cages full
of cooking utensils and baggage, with
tightly closed sides and big signs
warning the crowds, to "Beware. Dan
gerous." Up comes the den of lions,
with the lady In pink tights sitting on
a cracker box in the midst of them.
Up comes the clown, riding on a little
donkey that stops every fifty feet and
kicks up solemnly, while the crowds
roar with laughter. Up comes every
thing belonging to the circus that can
walk or be moved on wheels. Then
the last wagon swings round the cor
ner and the crowd flows Into the street
behind it.
There Is always the awful possibility
that father won't let you go to the cir
cus. Once there was a small boy in
a country town who had got hold of
50 cents and wanted to go to the circus
so badly that he fairly ached all over.
But his father said: "No, I don't be
lieve in going to too many circuses.
Y'ou're too small to go alone, and I
can't spare the time. You'll have to.
stay at home."
The small boy, desperate with disap
pointment, ran away and went to the
circus with another youth in similar
straits. They got their tickets, went
in, looked at the animals, and then
took their seats in the circus tent. Be
tween the acts they looked around
them. Presently the small boy, glanc
ing up, saw his father sitting six rows
higher up. At the same Instant bis
father saw him. Neither of them gave
any sign of recognition, aud neither
referred to the subject afterwards.
Only by the fact that he was not taken
out into the wood shed after he got
home was the small boy certain that
he had not been mistaken.
As a rule you didn't stay to "the
grand vocal. Instrumental, and terpsi
chorean concert in the main canvas im
mediately after the conclusion of the
performance." With the afternoon
concert over there was still the even
ing performance to look forward to.
Then the town relaxed back into its
normal condition.
A Musical Staircase.
A staircase has Just been Invented
which plays tunes as it is walked up
and down upon. A series of pins are
pressed by the feet and play gongs
and drums, while others are connected
with collapsible chambers which blow
trumpets and other similar instru
ments. Velocity of the Wind.
At the height of one mile the aver
age velocity of the wind is four times
as great as at the earth's surface.
Talent is of no use to the man whe
hasn't the courage to use it.