THE COLUMBIAN.
Published Evert Ykjdlt,
AT -
ST. HELENS, COLUMBIA CO., OR.,
BY
Y
Publishkd Every Friday,
AT
ST. HELENS, COLUMBIA CO., OR.,
by
E. G. ADAMS, Editor and Proprietor.
Subscription Rates:
One year, in advance $2 00
Six months, " 1 00
Three months, " 50
H
. O. AD Alls, Editor and Proprietor
Advertising Raths :
VOL. V.
ST. HELENS, COLUMBIA COUNTY, OREGON, SEPTEMBER 19, 1884.
JN O. Each subsequent Insertion 1 00
THE COLUMBIAN.
COLUMBIAN;
INTROSPECTION.
George Arnold.
Have you sent her back her letters have you
given her back her ring !
Have you tried to forget the haunting songs
that you loved to hear her sing?
Have you cursed the day you mother first?
tlviuked God thatVou were free.
And said in your inmost bVart. as you thought,
"Sho never was deartouief
You have cast her on", vour pride is touched,
you fancy that all is done.
That for you the world is bright again, and
bravely shines the sun.
You have washed your hands of passion; you
have whistled her down the wind.
0 Tom, old friend, this goes before, the
sharpest comes behind!
Yes, the sharpest is yet to come, for love is a
plant tliat never dies;
Its roots are deep as the earth itself; its
Lrauches wide as the skies.
And wherever once it has taken hold, it flour
ishes evermore.
Bearing a fruit that is fair outside, but bit
ter ashes at core.
1 see that you marvel greatly, Tom, to hear
such words from me.
But, if you knew my inmost heart, t' would be
no mystery.
ExixJrienee is bitter, but its teachings wo re
tain; Jt has taught me this, who once has loved,
loves never on earth agaiu!
And I, too, have my closet, with a ghastly
form inside
The skeleton of a perished love, kiiled by a
cru?l pride.
I sit by the tire at evening, as you will some
time sit.
And watch in tho roseate half light, the
the ghosts of happiness flit:
I, too, awaken at midnight, and stretch my
arms to enfold
A vague and shadowy image, with tiesses of
brown and gold";
Experience is bitter, indeed I have learned
at a heavy cost
The eoret of love's ) ersisteucy; I, too, have
loved and lost!
NERVE AND BARBARITY.
. Horror or the Public Kxecutlou
or
a Japanese Criminal.
I Cor. Pittsburg Leader.
While I was in Yokohama I witnessed
the public execution of a criminal. He
was a fine-looking Japanese, in the prime
of youth and strength, and was standing
under a post in the middle of a posse of
guard. The post had a cross-piece.
Nearly nude, he was standing erect, but
as motionless as a statue, and gazed
straight before him. Presently his jail
' ers moved aside and a gaunt, repulsive
looking native, the executioner, made
his appearance, clad from head to foot
in a dress of dingy yellow. Two assist
ants accompanied him, carrying half a
dozen round bamboo rods. The assist
ants dropped the rods and stretched the
criminal's hands over the cross-piece of
the post. The executioner now dallied
with the bamboos, and the poor creature
still looked into the shadowy distance as
though he was dumb. I watched him
closely and thought I detected a pallor
spread over his countenance.
The executioner now spat on the
pointed end of one of the bamboos, and
with a twL-inr. pushing motion thrust
it easily into ''the lesii f.bout half-way
between the hip and the arm pit. The
poor wretch turned and looked at his
tormentor and his lips slightly opened,
but he did not struggle. Iu a couple of
nrnutes, though it seemed longer, the
bloody point of the instrument emerged
from tiie sufferer's shoulder, and a
slight exclamation of satisfaction escaped
the crowd. Then the executioner went
to the other side with another bamboo
and did the same thing. During all
this there was not a single groan or cry
for mercy from the man.
At this juncture, to my surprise, the
executioner and his assistants picked up
the remaining bamboos and walked
away. 1 inquired what they meant and
was told the execution was over. It was
customary to leave the man that war,
and he would die in a couple of hours or
so. The bamooos would remain in him
until he had expired. A Japanese ex
ecutioner is taught to carefully avoid
the vital organs so as not to bring death
tooquieklv, and the executioner s repu
tation is gauged by the length of time his
victim lives.
DIlIPotiti on a Large Scale.
Ciiic.igo Times
In the winter of 1849-50, a j'oung sign
painter, of Brooklyn, finding his business
very dull, amused himself by going along
the Harlem road and painting his name,
occupation and business on all the rocks
and fences. Several business men were
struck with the idea and employed the
young man to blazon advertisements for
them in various localities. Soon after,
securing a large number of contracts for
the work, he traveled with his brush and
paint up the Missouri river, exercising
his peculiar talents on the bare crags of
thy Kooky mountains. He journeyed
into Oregon and daubed her pyramids.
Down the golden valley of the Sac, over
the granite cliffs of the Humboldt range
he went, leaving behind him staring
legends of "liver pills," "ague pads,"
etc., to terrify the wondering savage and
buffalo. We are happy to say he wa3
shot at several times and had to run to
gave his wretched hide.
He was pursued soon after by a rival
as fearless and unscrupulous as himself.
Finally, the two went into partnership,
and between. them transformed the coun
try into a vast bill-board. They estab
lished their headquarters in New York,
and undertook, at specified rates, to ad
vertise merchants, etc., in as few or
many states as desired. In 1880 the
manager of this business, the qu'ondam
Brooklyn sign-painter,, now a million
aire, declared that ho and his partner
had traveled 1,300.000 miles, and painted
90,000 signs, and used 500 barrels of lin
seed oil and 150 tons of white load. This
was before the two retired from active
!articipation in the manual part of the
msincss. They now have this work
done by their 1,800 agents, through whom
they can work tho whole United States
on the bill-board plan. They charge
for billing a patent medicine- in seven
teen states $30,000.
Just Our Luck.
Norristown Hoialil.J
Dr. Farr, an English scientist, says
that if one were to watch tho march of
1,000,000 people through life, ho would
observe that nearly 150,000 would die the
first year, 53,000 the second, 28 000 the
third, less than 4,000 in tho thirteenth,
and at tho end of 108 years there would
be but one survivor. Then wo shall not
undertake to watch the march of 1,000,
000 people through life. Th occupation
wouid be too gloomy something like
reading a London comic weekly; and it
would be just our luck not to be the one
survivor at the end of 103 years.
MISS MARIAN.
San Franciscan.
Shocked at the course of two or three
passing acquaintances, who, when for
tune left thorn, preferred an indolent life
to an industrious one, 1 plainly ex
pressed mv views in a daily journal in
which I cited a few instances of woman's
capacity and success when she was will
ing to work. A seamstress in mv em
ploy at the time had given me a history
of her life, whieti, wiui a rew variations
I wove into my article after the follow
ins fash ion:
"I saw the folly of waiting at home
for something which might never be, so
I jrot the agencv of a dressmaker s chart
for the 1'acine coast. My family was
horrified. Couldn't my brothers" take
care of me in case my parents died
Couldn't I always have a home with
them? But I silenced them with ray
answer that I was over ago and de
termined to fulfill what I had set out to
do; that 1 might always have a home
with mv relatives, but it would be a do
pendent one. 1 preferred to be inde
pendent.
"The first year I had laid up $700 in
the bank besides paying my own and
familv expenses; for m the meantime my
father became involved in business, and
ruy brothers had. nothing so far to assist
with. I can tell vou they were mighty
glad of my help then. I might have
gone to teaching or doing 'something re
speetable,' but it would only have paid
my own way, and what would the family
have done? I tell you they never said
again 'Marian has lowered the family
with that nonsensical chart.
"The second year I was as successfu
as the first, and the third I sold my right
tor ? 1,000. I put mv monev in a lodg
ing house and rented the entire concern
out at a good profit, and in one way and
another have managed to so use my
money that in stocks, money loaned out
and money in bank I have about $ lo,-
000. v hen old age comes on 1 shal
feel comfortable."
I could not resist adding to this
sketch:
I hough rather advanced in vears,
Marian is yet a pretty and agreeable
woman. If any one wants a wife of
this description, let him apply at the
office of The Post, and he may be able to
receive an introduction and full particu
lars."
lo the horror ot lhe l'ost manage
ment, this terminating jest was received
in sober earnest bv a multitude ot ex
cited individuals. They besieged the
business department, they overran the
editorial rooms. For a few davs the
chief editor's hair stood erect.
It was surprising to note that however
diverse the personal appearance of this
excited multitude long noses, short
noses, snub noses, crooked noses,
blue eves, black eves, pig eves, duskv
skins, freckled faces,.: t all, md short all
were unanimous upon one joint, in seek
ing an introduction to Miss Marian
They sought only a wife, they scorned
her monev. They were simply delighted
to find that after all these years the right
wontan and a vision of happiness had
dawned upon them at last. As fifteen
or twenty despondently left the ollice
one day, the news spread abroad that
The Post had leen mobbed on account
of an incnidiarv editorial.
Besides those brave ones who person
ally sought an interview . with Miss
Marion, numerous admirers sought her
hand through the bashful lover's con
venient go-between, the postoffice.
Within a week fiftv or one hundred let
ters were received bv the ghostly Marian,
all more or less alike. A dirty, fiy
speckled envelope was addressed upside
down, and covered all over with this in
scription:
for Miss Marian who had
the agency of the ladies
Charte on the pacific
Coast
dressmakers Charte.
The letter ran:
"San Francisco, April 10, 1875.
"Miss Marian: I flater myselfe that
the inttegrity of my mtenshun will ex
kuse the fredem of theese few lines
whirebv I am to aquante vou of the re
garde and est cam 1 have for you, hoping
3'ou will answer this m mv faviour.
am a young man myself and is of a
steady habit, hoping to meat with some
one the same disposition.
"No more at presente, but Kemanes
yours truly, John Jones.
"city hotel, first street, sanfrancisco."
Another good penmanship:
"San Francisco, April 10. 1875.
J I I f .. g . . . T... ... t f' ' iL
uit. ULUKdt. vi..v. aiii: i was mis
evening 'deeply interested in .reading
'Les Miserables' in your evening paper,
particularly the last part, which reads:
'Though rather advanced in years
Marian is yet a pretty and agreeable
woman, etc. Allow me to say that I am
just sjxiling for an agreeable wife with
good'eommon sense, but I have not cheek
enough to call at the office of The Post
for an introduction. But if Marian will
correspond with me I shall feel greatly
favored and pledge my honor as an
Englishmen as to the sincerity of my
motives for asking the favor.
"Respectfully yours, F. L. T.
"Address F. L. T., P. O."
Others were as follows:
"San Francisco, Cal., April 12, 1875.
"Miss Marian: 1 hope you will
pardon me for my boldness or audacity
for thus addressing you unsolicited, and
I knew you'll do it when I inform you
the reason why. I noticed the descrip
tion ot you in The Evening Post of the
10th inst., winch was my beau ideal of a
wife. It struck mo forcibly, indeed, so
I thought I would send you a note, hav
ing come to the conclusion that "a faint
heart never won a fair lady." lama
bachelor over 33 years of age, and it
behooves me to make hay ere the sun
fades away.
"I would respectfully exchange photo
graphs with you if it is congenial with
your ideas of propriety. And I assure
you that this has sprung from motives of
the purest and kindest intentions mat
rimonial. "If this meets your approbation please
address immediately,
"S. A. Janes, Kuss House, S. F."
"San Francisco, April 14, '75.
Miss Marian: I am a clergyman a
widower with five children needing a
mother's ca;-e. To what better use can
you appropriate your talents and time
than in bestowing them upon me and
mine? I need not inform you that I am j
much sought after by single ladies, not
onlvof mv own flock, but of other' de
nominations, having had in the past
three months over seventy proposals.
"I Hatter myself that wherever iny
hand is offered it will not be retused, not
only oh account of the social distinction
with which mv calling is crowned, but
on account of my personal attractions as
well.
"I impatiently await your answer, ap
pointing an interview, where all arrange
ments can lie made. Yours for eter
nity, "Kev. James A. Morrow.
After reading . a bagful of such mis
sives, I determined to end the jest which
these good folks were so earnest about
so in the next issue there appeared-this
notice:
"Marian would state to her numerous
admirers that she has deeded away her
entire property, to take effect on her
wedding day."
In a twinkling the kaleidoscope o
'seekers for a true woman" was broken
into dissolving views of disappointed
masculines. Alas, poor Marian ha
there been a Marian! All dav Ion
poured in a flood of letters from former
correspondents, retracting their matri
inonuil oilers, lhe minister said
"While my offer was made solely on
account of your merits, I could not
marry one who reposed so little faith in
her husband. 1 regret that
in vour character compels me to with
draw from further communication with
you. Kev. J. A. Morro
S. A. Jones, Kuss house, savs:
"You need not send your photograph
I bet you're a wrinkled-up, homely, bad
temiHTed old maid, anywav. I wasn
in -earnest from the first, but thought I'd
have a little fun with you. Only let me
give you a little advice: ait unti
alter you re married before you let your
husband know you ve got nothing.'
But the mail also brought something
else addressed to Muss Marian, which, in
a moment of frivolity, I carried to my
seamstress.
"You may do as you like about
answering it," I said, 'laughingly, as sne
put on her strongest glasses ami read
"San Francisco, April 15, 1873.
"In a late issue of The l'ost I saw an
account of vou. At that time I dare
not address you, owing to the Money
vou were reported to possess, in las
Evening's Issue I find that there isonely
the Woman, and as that is what 1 am in
want of I address you .Now about My
self.
"I am 40 vears Old, five feet five High
weigh 150 pounds, a little Gray, Dark
aubern hair, blue eves, of perfect Form
am considered by mv acquaintance good
Company. No Stain of any kind on mv
Character: am in good Social and Moral
Standing, perfect health, Able and Will
ing to Make a home for a pure V lfe. in
fact I want no Doll but an Equel I ask
for nothing more than I can give I should
be pleased to form your Acquaintance.
.1 have Jived in One family for the last ",
vears, can give the best of References in
this citv. I am alout to leave in a few
davs for a tour through Nevada, Idaho,
Washington Territory and Oregon for
the firm 1 am connected with. Will you
please answer this on receipt, as I mean
business, yours Capt. 1. G. Pratt.
"Harrison st., one house below 2nd st,'
.Miss .Marian pushed back her glasses
reflectively.
"If vou will leave this with me for a
few days I think I will answer it
I was not surprised. I left it.
A few weeks after Miss Marian called
on me. Her face was radiant as she in
vited me to her wedding with the
captain.
"He doesn't spell any better than the
law allows, and he has a horrid way of
commencing every other word with
capital; but that doesn't worry me a bit,
because I always expect to go with him
everywhere, and there'll be no occasion
for writing letters. Besides, at my time
of life a person can t expect everything in
a husoand, and he is just as good as gold
Everybody speaks well of him. I'm sure
1 can never be thankful enough to you
for my happiness."
That was in 1875. Circumstance pre
vented my going to tho wedding,
Marian gave up sewing after her mar
riage, and so it happened that I never
saw the captain and rarely met the
captaiu's wife. But last week she came
to me not at all in a spirit or thankful
ness dressed m deep mourning.
"Your husband is dead?"
"Worse than that my mother,
wouldn't put on mourning for him!"'
"No?" I incredulously interrogated
"Not by a great deal. He may be
dead now, lor all 1 know or care.
"You shock me. I supposed you were
tho happiest ot the happy."
"So 1 was for a few weeks. Then his
hands itched to hold the purse-strings.
and I had no peace until I gave them to
him. One morning 1 got up and he was
gone taking not only my purse but a
washed-out blonde Market street milli
ner, l was divorced three months ago,
and now I've gone back to the beginning.
When shall 1 commence sewing for you
again to-morrow"
"He wasn't as good as gold after all?"
I could not resist saving.
She turned on me with considerable as
perity.
"lake for granted that a man isn't
worth selling to a junk store who pro
poses to a woman in that fashion; and
the woman who accepts him ought to be
put into a straight-jacket. Every one
has to play the fool at some period of
life. My time was late, but I acted my
part well and long. Let us never speak
of it again. I told you I intended to
commence at the beginning."
My sewing-room has regained a lonir-
lost picture. Marian sits there plying
her needle and adjusting her glasses-f-
they arc ten years stronger than when
she sat thcro before as quietly as though
she not only had never indulged in a
lover, but as if a dream of romance had
never entered her humdrum thoughts. I
Delighted Slttlits Hull.
Sitting Bull visited Fort Snelling tho
other day. Writing to Tho Boston
Journal, a correspondent thus describes
an amusing episode: "He was regaled
at the commander's tabic with canned
peaches. He sat up to the table like a
gentleman, and helped himself with his
silver fork, but no one could make him
smile. Finally Mrs. Col. Andrews came
into tho room, and the moment he saw
her he jumped to his feet, clasped her
hands, and beamed all over with delight
is this not the way to treat Indians'
THE MEN WITH THE PIQ.
The Daisy, "Jnt From Scotland
-What Was Forgotten.
Detroit Free Press.
A few days ago two men, who were
afterward found to be Detroiters, arrived
in a town about fifty miles to the west o
this, leading a pig. It was perhaps big
enough and heavy enough to be called a
hog. but they termed it a pig, and as
they turned it over to the care of the
landlord at whose inn they proposed to
rest for the night, one of the men ex
plained:
"Be awful careful with that pig. He's
a daisy a new breed just from Scotland
We've sold him to a farmer out here for
$50, and we don't want anything ' to
happen to him."
The landlord locked the pig up and
then began to think and cogitate and
susiect. When the strangers had gone
to bed he called m some of the boys and
said:
"I've twigged the racket; them two
fellows are sharpers, and that's a guess
ing pig. To-morrow they will give you
a chance to guess at his weight at 10
cents a guess, and you'll be cleaned out
only you won't! As the fellows sleep
we will weigh their pig and beat their
game."
Nobody slept until the pig was taken
over to the scales and weighed. He
pulled down 170 pounds to a hair, and
the villagers went home and hunted up
their nickels and dreamed of pigs and
scales and sharpers through the re
mainder of the night.
Next morning the pig was led around
in front, and before starting off on his
journey, one of the owners remarked to
the assembled crowd:
"Gentlemen, I'm going to weigh this
pig directly. Maybe some of you would
like to guess on his weight? 1 11 take al
guesses at 10 cents each, and whoever
hits it gets 50 cents."
This provoked a large . and selected
stock of winks and smiles, but no one
walked up until the pig man said that
any one person could guess as many
times as he cared to, provided a dime ac
companied each guess. Then a rush set
in. ThFee or four merchants put up
fifty guesses each. A justice of the
peace took thirty. A lawyer said about
twenty would do for him. Before there
was any let up in the guessing about 600
had been registered and paid for. Every
soul of 'em guessed at 170 pounds. It
was curious what unanimity there was
in the guessing, but the pig men didn t
seem to notice it. WheD all had been
given a chance the pig was led to the
scales, and lo! his weight was exactly
174 pounds!
"You see, gentlemen," explained the
spokesman, "while this animal only
weighs 170 pounds about 11 o clock at
night, we feed him about five pounds of
cornmeal m the morning before weigh
ing! You forgot to take this matter
Then somelxxlv kicked the landlord,
and he kicked the justice, and the justice
kicked a merchant, and when the pig
men looked back from a distant hill the
whole town was out kicking itself and
throwing empty wallets into the river.
Kizht and Left.
(British MedicalJournal.
M. Delaunay, of. Paris, lias made an
extended and careful investigation to as
certain if, in the majority of cases, the
right upper and lower extremity be
crossed over the left or the left over the
right, and which side most persons in
cline to when in the sitting posture.
According to M. Delaunay, certain
breeds of dogs, terriers, Newfoundlands
and poodles, cross the right foot over the
lett. lhe Chinese and Japanese cross
the left over the right. Europeans cross
the right over tho left. M. Delaunay ob
served that infants under 3 years of ago
cross the left arm over the right, older
children crossing the right over the left,
60 per cent, doing so at 6 vears of age.
Robust children cross the right arm over
the left; the idiotic and weak, including
those who are incapable of working,
cross the left over the right. The Cal-
mucks and Arabs cross the right over
the left, like'the Europeans.
Robust children cross the right leg over
the left earlier than their weaker play
mates. Persons who cross the right leg
oyer the lefi lean toward the left when
sitting; those who place the left upper
most lean to the right.
Sobering Drunken Tien.
Chicago New?.
I remember that the captain of a lum
ber schooner came to me one night and
said he must have his men on board im
mediately, drunk or sober, as ho was
compelled to sail at once. I went with
him and we found them at Sailor Sally's.
There were seven of them and they were
all very drunk. Well, we carried them
on board one at a time and corded them
up. The captain then uncovered the
water cask and we plunged one fellow in.
It only took about a minute for the wet
to sober him. Then we pulled him out
and served the other six in the same
way, one at a time. Within twenty
minutes the whole of them were as sober
as judges, They went to work with a
will, ami when 1 left they were singing
and yo-hoing at the rojws.
Plant Nut Trees.
Baltimore Market Journal.
The idea of planting edible nut bear
ing trees where shade is desired, instead
of those which are solely ornamental, is
not new, "but the suggestion is one that
will bear thinking about by those who
contemplate planting shade or orna
mental trees. Chestnut, walnut, hick
orynut and butternut trees are all nearly
as fine in appearance as horse chestnut
and maple, and, aside from the sourco
of revenue, which will in time accrue to
their owners from the fruit, the timber
of such trees is always in demand, and
the tree itself may become profitable
should it become desirable at any time
to remove it.
Always Ailing:.
Buffalo Exnress.
When Mrs. W. K. Vanderbilt's child
ren are ill. she has the medicine pre
scribed for them nut up in candy. In
consequence the Vanderbilt children are
never quite well.
The Widow's Flock.
"Chineta." Chief Ouray's widow, has
6,000 sheep located on Douglas creek,
near the line of Utah, that have not been
shorn for three years, and is willing to
give half to some one, who will shear
them.
Street-Cars as misslonalres.
fForeien Letter.
"When the question of introducing
street-cars in India first came up, nearly
twenty years ago," said John Stephenson,
the famous car-builder, "one ot tne great
est obstacles to be considered was caste.
It was easy to devise a method of separat
ing, within reasonable limits, tie various
classes, for the cars eould be made with
two interior compartments, and with
seats on top for passengers of inferior
classes. But how to collect the fares was
the Question that puzzled everybody. A
Brahmin conductor could not receive coins
from the hands of his inferiors, nor could
a Brahmin passenger receive change from
a conductor of lower caste. There were
many other regulations growing out of
caste distinctions which threatened : to
make street-cars a failure in the cities i of
India. But the cars were sent out, ami
matters were left largely to adjust them
selves. The result is that instead of caste
making the street-cars a failure, the street
cars have made caste to a considerable ex
tent a failure. They are now u ilized in
the principal cities of India very much as
they are in Js ew l ork. i
"Besides doing away with caste ob
stacles to their success, the street-cars
have removed manv of the restrictions
which caste put upon the transaction of
business generally in that country. 1 am
told that they have produced a very
noticeable change in thi9 respect that
they may te regarded, indeed, as among
the chief instruments with which the
changed order of things was brought
about. Street-cars are a necessity, and
whatever stands in the way of their use
will le tlone awav with by the people.
When the British government made it
impossible to enforce forfeitures and other
penalties by reason of the loss or renuncia
tion of caste, a considerable step toward
the abolition of caste distinctions was
taken. No laws for the government ' of
persons have been more rigid or more
speedy in respect to their penalties than
were the regulations of caste. In certain
provinces of India, when under native rule,
it was regarded as justifiable homicide for
a man of high caste to strike dead a person
of inferior caste who should touch him
even by accident. One of the steps to
ward the present state of things were per
mitting a Brahmin to engage in pursuits
which had been followed only by persons
of inferior grade, while still prohibiting
persons of low caste from taking upon
themselves functions which belonged ; to
those above them in rank.
In the present stage of the decay of caste
very embarrassing conditions arise. Not
long ago a man of good ability, but of in
ferior caste, was made a judge. He could
sit in judgment upon the acts of Brahmins
anil even sentence them to imprisonment,
but he could not sit at the table with them
after quitting the court-room.
California Worship of .Honey,
' f Helen B At tlett Iu Pioneer rvs. 1
"Califoruians have such big hearts," re
marked one who had lived there a score ot
years, and ought to know. Yet the coun
try is fur from perfect, even though it is in
many respects a marvel. In the hrst place,
the worship of mouoy, particularly in San
r ranoisro, has reached a formidable pass.
If a gentle man descants on the desirability
of any young lady he has nu t in society,
he rarely deeriles her as bright or inter
esting or intelligent or pretty, but simply
as the jososor of so many hundreds of
thousands. Every marriageable ypung
woman is distinctly labeled as to her mar
ket value. Y ithout a large fortune you
are a bigger noltody than you are in New
York; and with it you can envy the des
tinies of the entire state.
It is no great exaggeration to assert that
the whole of California is owned bv half a
dozen Irishmen; and, of course, such a
condition of affairs conduces neither to the
public nor the private weal. Money is al
ways a power, but in California it becomes
a gxl, and character suners a consequent
demoralization. Still, no one should judge
a young country severely. I here is al
ways any amount of blundering, of eru
ditv, that youth has to go through with.
Snn Francisco lias not sowed her wild oats
yet. Perhaps, with her exuberance of life
and spirits, she never will; but by and by I
she will sow them more quietly, more de
cently and in order, as New York or
Washington does now; and then the world
will ceased to le shocked. Society never
troubles itself alout any manner of wick
edness, if only it is all done under cover,
and with a strict regard for the pro-
priet les.
The High Collar Craze.
Boston Globe.
"Yes, sir, this high collar craze is as
suming rather high proportions," remarked
a dealer iu gents' furnishing goods to a re-
porter yesicruay. urn see ine present
style of lKN4is higher than it has ever
been belore, and tne young men seem all
collar."
"Where will it end?"
"Well. I declare I do not know. Iam
looking for an addition by 1890. which
will entirely envelop the chin and give a
barber no end of trouble when he wants to j
shave a customer. Then, as one extreme
will lead to others, there may be an up
rising in 18'Jo, when young men who c n-
not raise a mustache will be glad to add
another inch and take in an uper lip and
a pug nose.
I his is a. great country, sir, and pro
gress is our motto. 1 look for still another
bull movement m collars when we reach
the new century, 1900, and we may expect
a collar which will take in an entire head
and face, with air holes for nose, mouth
and eyes. It will le warm and nice in the
winter, and will lw particularly popular
with homely young men.
IIcer-Drlnklns at ITIunlch.
(Foreign Ltt3r.J
We went into a large yard with lines of
forms and a shed on one side. It was full
of portly shopkeciwrs, men in uniform,
students with their tiny colored caps stuck
on three hairs, and lumbering mechanics
and porters. Each man possessed himsell
of a numbered tankard, and handed it,
with the money, over the counter iu the
shod, when it was filled from a mighty bar
rel with strong "bock beer, only to be
had in perfection in the month of May. As
your number was sung out you clutched at
your tankard. A new barrel had to 1 c
tapped on the average every half-hour, lie
tweon each gulp of the cool, brown liquoi
a slice of raw turnip sprinkled with sail
was eaten. That is the correct mode ol
expressing its flavor from the malt. The
raw turnip serves as the olive between the
courses at dinner, or black coffee at a
smoking seance it corrwts the palate.
The Kind She Wanted.
I La Vie Parisienne.J
A ladv entering a circulating library ask
for a novel. "I don't know how to tell
you exactly the kind I want," the says.
"Oh, 1 think we shall be able to suit you,
is the reply. "I mean something lively,''
exclaims the intending reader; "the sort of
book that would not be precisely suitable
for the library of a voung girl. "Jlaric.
cries the Keeper of the bookstore to her as
nihtant, "Novel for a woman of 85." :
A MICHIGAN LOGGING CAMP.
Ninety Tons of Lumber Palled Over
an Ice Road by Two Horses.
Cleveland Leader.
The several logging camps of one
lumber firm in this city are all in north
ern Michigan, and have turned out in
the season just closed an aggregate of
4U,uuu, OOO feet of lumber. The camps
are scattered along the Au sable and
Pine rivers. Some of the logs are
floated 150 miles before the mill at Os
coda is reached. The logs are hauled
from where they are cut to the river on
low bob sleds over a carefully prepared
roadway. These roads, after a snow
foundation is formed at the begin-
ning of the season, are carefully
scraped with a patent scraper.
Then a sprinkling-cart, with an
abundant flow of water, is run over the
road at night. Toe water freezes and
makes the roadbed a mass of solid ioe.
Each snowfall is carefully scraped off
and the flooding process con inues until
the ice driveway is eighteen or twenty
inches above the surface of the ad
jacent land. Thus built, the roadbeds
are firm and not as susceptible to a
thaw as the ordinary snow-packed
roads. In laying out these roads a dis
tance of two miles is often traversed
to make a point not more than one-
quarter of a mile distant. This is
requisite in making it perfectly level
or with a slight incline toward the ob
jective point of the loaded sleds.
On such magnificent roads immense
hauls can be made, and the expense in
curred In' building and caring for them
is amptly justified. In the company s
office in this city is a large photograph
of the largest load of logs ever drawn
by a single team of horses. The
picture was taken about three weeks
ago at Otsega lake, on the head waters
of the Au Sable river. There are
twenty-one pine logs, sixty-four feet
long, and the load measured 3U,Ubs
feet of good lumber, board measure.
The hollow butts, bark, and waste are
all scaled out of these figures. A close
estimate of the weight of the load puts
it at ninety tons.
The team weighed about 3,200
pounds, and easily hauled this immense
weight a distance of a mile and a quar
ter. The horses pull wide apart, the
neck yoke and whiffletrees being twelve
feet in length. The bolsters of the
bob sleds on which the load rests are
of the same length, and the . logs
rise up to a height of about sixteen
feet. The runners of the bob sleds are
about four inches wide and six inches
thick. The bobs set very low and
spread fully twelve feet. ' They are con
nected by cross chains which run from
the heel of the front sled to the toe of
the rear one, crossing in the centre.
The logs are loaded by means of skids
which reach f.om the ground to the
load. With a rope and tackle the horses
roll the logs up the inclined plane into
place With the greatest ease. 1 here is
a deal of rivalry in the lumber camps
over the question of big loads. A few
years ago three or four of these logs,
scaling 1,500 or 2,000 : feet of lumber,
were considered a pretty good load for
a team. The improved roadways have
largely contributed to the increased
hauls.
Jay Gould's Son.
JN. Y. Star's "Man About T. wn."J
I met George Gould a day or two
since, and in his usually pleasant way
the subject drifted into newspapers.
1 suppose you receive quite a num
ber of newspapers everyday; do you
not?"
"Yes; between two I and three hun
dred, all of them containing some refer
ence or another to my father.
Are they mostly complimentary i "
"Weiy said George, laughing,
there may be a difference of opinion
as to the meaning of the word. X don't
suppose, however, that ninety-nine in a
hundred newspaper j statements are
based upon fact. They are all more or
less exaggerated. But the best way is
to take no notice of them.
"I presume you have lots of cranks
visiting the Broadway office?"
Scarcely a day passes but some one
has cot a pet scheme to develop. Not
long since a man sent an improvement
for a car coupler or something of that
sort. Not receiving any answer by
mail he came here -for the drawings.
They couldn't be found. Then he wanted
$o00 because we failed to return them.
But that's only one out of a dozen such
instances.
Waxes of Circus People.
(New York Star. 1
Salaries of agents and heads of de
partments range from $20 to f 200 a
week, according to ability; leapers and
tumblers, from $15 to f 50 a week ; bare
back and somersault riders, from $75
to 1250 a week ; pad riders 50 per cent.
less; trapeze performers, gymnasts,
wire walkers, clowns and animal
trainers, from $15 to! $75 per week;
while canvasnen, grooms, property
men and drivers receive from $20 to $50
a month. Board. lodRing and trans
portation are included in the above
scale. !
i
Kngllsh. as She Is Pronounced.
(Turlington Hawkeye.J
A Kansas correspondent wants to
know how Mr. Gladstone s name is pro
nounced. Heaven, that knoweth all
things, only knows, anxious one. It is
an English name and the spelling
thereof is not ever so remotely con
nected with the pronunciation. It is
probably pronounced uleston in .Liver
pool, Gals ton in Manchester, G lis ton
down in the country, and Chumley in
London.
A Kuropean Scandal.
Chicago Journal.
One of the greatest scandals of the
day is, that of the 4,000,000 francs sub
scribed by the public charity of Europe
ior tne oenent oi tne survivors in tne
Casamicciola earthquake, last July, not
a cent has been distributed. The con
tributions are at Naples, in the hands of
a central committee which renders no
account of them.
The Strawberry Box.
Cincinnati Commercial Gazette.
Horticulturists inform us that the
largeness of the improved strawberry
and the diminutiveness of the highly-
bred box will not for this season pre-
i it . 1 ii m J .
vent tne laiier irom accommodating ac
least one specimen of the fruit.
The Woman's Toothache.
Lew Ik ton Journal.
She looked in at the dentist's door, said
she had a tooth she believed had a cavity
in it, and maybe she'd have it out if
he wouldn't hurt any. Tho dentist as
sured he never hurt anybody. She said
she expected her teeth would hurt awful
hard. They wasn't like anybody's else.
He said he guessed that was so. Kh
said she knew it would kill her to have a
tooth pulled, for she couldn't stand any
thing. She knew she should faint or
scream or do something horrid, and -the
like of that; she always did. lie said he
didn't believe she would do so very
badly, but she said she should. Oh, she
knew she should; she wasn't like any
body else in this world, and her teeth
were awfully sensitive. Mary Ellen
Jones could sit right down any day and
have any amount of teeth out, and the
like of that , but she - never could, she
knew she couldn't. She said she could
flv riirht ud throuch the roof to think
of it.
The dentist said she might
take something, but nlie said
sho couldn't, she shouldn t dare
to. She'd heard of a girl out west
who took laughing gas and she laughed
three weeks and the like o' that, and all
the family went crazy; and she didn't
want to drive her family crazy, for if
their girl went away they were going to
break up this summer and go down to
the beach, and she was doing every-
thinz she could to make it hard for the
girl so she would go away, for she'd
heard there was a lovely rink down to
the beach and the like o' that, and she
wanted to go. And then she asked the
dentist if he thought her mouth would
be a good one to ht false teeth to. He
said she'd better sit-down and let him
look at the one that ached, but she said
she guessed sho wouldn't trouble him
to-day. The tooth didn't ache any then;
she didn't know as she could tell which
one it was, and maybe 'twas only tired,
she'd chewed so much spruce gum this
spring and like o' that; anyway she
wouldn't bother him. She 'gposed den
tists were awful busy folks. And she
gave place to an unshaven man that
jumped five feet in the air when the
dentist pulled out a molar with inch
fangs.
Old Philadelphia Ways.
History of Philadelphia.
One hundred and fifty years ago the
young gallants were wont to go walk
ing round on moonlit nights, stopping
now and then to chat with the fair ones
sitting on tho porches (flirting would Iw
the name nowadays), and, as they could
not do this on dark nights, they went by
the name of lunariaons. This porch
amusement was, of course, enjoyable
only in the summer. In winter flie com
pany was received in the sitting-room,
which might as well be styled the living-
room, for the many purposes it served.
They dined in it, and sometimes slept in
it. The high-backed settee which graced
one of its corners revejiled a bed when
the top was turned down a somewhat
rough invention, from which our wooden
sofa bedstead has descended.
The furniture and general arrange
ment of the room were generally of the
simplest kind; settees with stiff, high
backs, one or two large tables of pine or
maple, a high, deep chest of drawers,
containing the wearing apparel of the
family, and a corner cupboard, in which
the china and plate were displaj'ed, con
stituted a very satisfactory set of parlor
furniture in the early part of the
eighteenth century; sofas and sideboards
were not vet in use. nor were carpets.
The floor was sanded, the walls white
washed and the wide mantel of the open
fireplace was of wood. The windows
admitted light through small panes set
in leaden frames. A few small pictures
painted on glass and a looking glass with
a small carved border adorned the walls.
Wealthier people had damask covered
couches, instead of settees, and their
furniture was of oak or mahogany, but
in the same plain, stiff style, i hey used
china cups and saucers, delftware from
Lngland, and massive silver waiters,
bowls and tankards. Plated ware was
unknown, and those who could not
afford tho real article were content to
use pewter plates and dishes. Not &
few ate from wooden trenchers. Lamps
were scarcely known. Dipped candles
in brass candlesticks gave sufficient light
at night.
Telephones and Improved Hearing.
New Haven Register.
It appears that many people who have
telephones in their houses or places of
i j i . r xi i
ousiness, ana use mem irepaeuiiy, mm
their hearing bettered. The best testi
mony, however, comes from the central
office: At each switch-board sits an
operator, generally a girl, who, from
morning till night, haggles with un
reasonable subscribers till her head
fairly rings with t4hello," "all right,"
"go ahead." Now, her ear is drilled to
catch tho faintest sound. If an operator
were to take a switch-board one day in
the week, only, and do all the work re-
auired on that day, the practice would -oubtless
be detrimental, because it
would be exhaustive to both the muscu
lar and nervous make-up of the ear.
vstematic uso of the telephone seems to
develop the hearing above its normal
acutencss. Tho difficulty which people
find in working tho telephone comes
from inability to fix the attention on
what is heard.
Dathlna; In Salt Lake.
Harper's Magazine.
In tho water of Salt Lake a bather can
lie on the surface of the water without
any exertion whatever, or by passing a
towel under his knees and holding the
two ends he can remain in any depth of
water kneeling, with the head and
shoulders out of water, or by shifting it
under the sole of the feet he can sit on
the water. The one exertion, in fact, is
to keep one s balance; none whatever is
reauired to keen afloat. The onlv dan-
ger? therefore, arises from choking by
accidentally swallowing some of the
water, for the strength of the brine is so
intense that the muscles of the throat are
convulsed, and strangulation ensues.
All the same, I have myself dived several
times into Salt Lake, and have . urvived.
A Simple Remedy. '
Philadelphia Chronicle.
A few tacks scattered iudiciouslv on
the stairs have been known to break up
the practice some husbands have of
pulling off their boots in the hallway
when they come home late at ni ;ht