T H IN G S M IL IT A R Y . G e «. H oward w ill m ake a pleasure trip to Spain an sportsm en is not to clim b a fence w ith ; A ir laals are th e m odern sine quo non a gun a t full cock. Philadelphia Times. of tin» invalid. N othing can be more ° 0 G IV E T H E B E S T B A R G A IN S I N ---------------------- - T k M’llKH "Tom m y T ucker, how restfu l and com fortable to th e «dek m any seasons arc there?” N orth Side fram e th an the relief from th e bed fa­ ------------------------------------------------- Y oungster—"T w o, m a'am , W inter a n ’ tigue which th is invention affords. w hen the stre e ts is all tore u p .”—Chica­ They an* tick-covered and readily in­ go T ribune. flated. T he slig h test motion alters the position of tin* occupant, and there is V etting I t M ildly .—C ustom er (who no such th in g as a lumpy surface possi­ hud lost all his teeth , to landlord who lia I served him w ith a very tough ble licnculh hiia. IN T H E C IT Y O F E U C E N E . stcn k l “ Landlord, you are a flatterer!" — Ilunm ristisehe B latter. A N E W V E R S IO N . U N D E R T A K IN G and E M B A L M IN G a Specialty Tw o fkiknds m eeting, th e follow ing s m u . i . fry —Scallops. co lh sju y ensued: “ W here have you All ordere for Furniture sent us from the Siuslnw will be shipped from Portland direct S teak holders—Broilers. l»een?” “ To my tailo r; and I had h an l P ick th e ir a rt Etchers. w ork to m ake him accept a little m oney.” “ You astonish me! W hy?” Go to blazes—Firem en. “ B ecause he w anted m ore.”—Tid-Bits. M ust I h * stopped—The organ. T o ti .I.M»— “ I auppoar B illow w ill get ( an r be blow cd—Shot* horns. all hl* fa th e r’s property, as he hus no (• ives us p o in ts—The compass, b ro th e rs o r siste rs.” D im lin g — " lie A UR: \K t ast r»*ll— 1 he sausage. has, th o ugh. I know of at least five IhlK lx*st policy—A paid-up one. g irls w ho have prom iard to la* sisters to II A V E th e rig h t of w eight—Coal buyer. l.h n .” —IX ’trw lt F ree Press. F sei -K ss unless they are cracked— WH Y ?— ---------------- AN ADVERTISEMENT X- U 'T IM FURNITURE ---- ------- and CARPETS H. M. C " ambkrlin . SOM E MONEY M ATTERS. A hold double eagle of 1849 is w orth •100. T urkic an* 11,400,000,000 In g oh l in ci e u la tio ti th ro u g h o u t the w o rld . Eggs. A n a n n u al e v e n t- T h e fall of the y ea r. R E P A IR E D PR O M PTLY A hi key call—“ Ten m inutes for din- nt CttKATVRF.s of im agination—Jove and ' and W O R K WARRANTED- , T ick la rg e st gntenltaolc e x ta n t is a Ju n o . •19.909 bill, and only one such note has A» * 'Ysg,x*s it alom— The confirmed a t I L o It K X c E V A 1! I E T Ï S T O B?B» been p rin te d bv th e governm ent. Of bachelor.—Mail and Express. F ront S treet , - » - _ V o m c x r e . , O k EÍ’G -'" F lorence ~