o •
e
*
o
e
•’
O '
o
..........
' ’’
ON AN AUTUMN SKETCH.
o
o
* ‘
Phanka to the artist, ever on my wall
*1 he sunset slay« ;
that hill iu glory
rolled,
i h*»' tre - and clou<is iu crimson and in
gold.
Burn on, nor <-oo1 when evening shadows
fall.
— Janies Russ II Ix>an 11.
‘ There is a season that’s brimful of glad-
uos-i and joy.
When the heartstrings of life gladly
ring;
*Tis the bright golden Autumn unknown
to alloy.
When the little browu squirrel is king.
When the bushy-tailed fellow is lord over
all.
The woods are decked gaily to greet
him,
\\ iute scarlet tinged leaves from the
maple trees fail,
And dance o'er the meadows to meet
him.
Through woodlands lie scurr.es, through
runlets he hurries.
To the hickory tree in the wold :
And as happy is he as a king ere could
be,
'I’hough be wears not a circlet of gold.
I leiglio to the motiareh of dingle and hol-
low j
His praises let everyane sing ;
For we must needs be merry, be happy
anti cheery,
»»
Wlieu the little brown squirrel is king.'
John Willoway gazed from the de­
sign on the Bristol board in his hand
to th» ftiiahed'face.of bi» fair visitor.
••Excellent, MI sh Dobb,” he said. "A
•lire seller. You are a positive genius
in advertisement designing. Now I’have
• -nt for you with the objeijt of entering
into » permanent arrangement with re­
gard to your services. I tlud there are
not enough working hours In my day,
•n<t. 1 wl»b to relegate the advertise­
ment department to. a capable special­
ist. Hilary £250. What do you say?”.
The young Indy laughed delightedly.
“k’<m really mem that you will pay
wo» £250 .a year -for supplying this sort
nt tiling to order?” she said'.
“IMm’t disparage It,” hhe smiled. “I
hsve'rertain proof of Its effectiveness.
•n<i I'm a business man. Publicity Is
the lifeblood of our enterprise, and I
••nt good stuff. Kay you'll accept.”
“I’ll» glad you think »o highly of my
•ff< >rt»,” the girl returned. “I never
Imagined when I posted you that first
»May flint It would lead to this. It
•truck me ss I .rend your atlvertlse-
Mw*r>1s- In the magazines thnt I could
Qnasibly |«r<M?ii<*e aomethlng worthy.
•n4, having time on my hands and
knowing ’Zalvo' to ti» everything you
elafrnwd for it, 1 niad*- the attempt.
You w»re goiwl enough to accept ft and
f<» Invite more. Your check made' me,
feet quite proud of m.vself, and I will
luglv rotnplled. As to any permanent
•r/angeinent, however, yon must not
♦tiinli nw ungrateful, -but circumstances
Would not permit of my joining your'
•faff. If you will favorably consider
my efforts aa n free lance I will umler
♦•ke to covitluue the supply for my
own gratifi« atlon
t feel quite aom<*-
<ti»dy. I can asstire you. when I see my
nda. it» the paper». Yon must under-
•tend that this work la done surrep'fl-
VoMialy. My people don’t ansp<*ct me
••t a hobby, and I’in afraJd flie.v
Wouldn’t he altogether ph*hsed to kruiw
iiiv particular form of madness.”
’ .“Yon underrate your cafialillltles. be­
lieve w».” said .lohn. “I may take it
♦ben that • permanency la out of the
question.
Frankly V r,n disnppolnteil.
hut I will idn l you to your undertak
Ing. and 1 a!«.»H ekpect you to bring
rue freati designs whenever th.» afflatus
n»‘*v*w yep.”
Mhe rose and h -hl .nit her hand,
"Thank yon.” she •alii, returning bls
•mile. “I will certainly come.".
For aome time after she had gofle
Joltn- Willnwnv’ sat before his desk In
• plenaftnt’reverie’,, conjured up by her
tli«rm of mnuner and appearance.
The ais-rot of. the com]H«sitloli of
“Zalvo” had been given to him but
four yenra .previously, when he was
earning s nioilrst livelihood as u Jmir
nnllst. and. realizing its |*>ssibllltles,
he had launched the business. From
■mall lieglnnings he had. by sheer work
and the application of the greater per
eentage of his profits to publicity, de
veloiicd the enterprise until “Znlto”
had become a household word through
•lit the kingdom
At thirty two lie w.ia well on tlie
high road to fortune.
I’lie claims of business In those four
years had held him chained; and.
though in bearing anil appearance, lx*
was a man who might have wooed suc-
«•essfully. he had not sought tlw society
of the fair sex, ami was. cmisequetitly,
•ntircly heart-whole.
“I guessed It was Inqieless from flic
first sight of her,” lie mused, ns he
gazed at the design. “Iler whole ap-
pearance proclaims refinement, taste
and wealth This kind rtf a thing Is
but n passing whim a stolen pleasure
to be snatched furtively for fear of dis
niiprorlng parents
who. doubtless,
would regard dabbling In trade as a
blot on their «•cutcheon. Quaint thnt
I should pitch on ’Zalvo.’ But, b.V
George! she <*«n product« the real stuff
1 wish she had to earn her dally
bread.”
lie touiul himself smiling at the
thought. Again and again while he
applied himself to the day’s work the
lurmftt
>u‘( I»<i*<h1ng. flushed face
gygi ugniruilqg personality aKetted hla
*
O
pen and switched hla thoughts from the her waywWd glam-es towards a certain
RENOWNED JAPANESE SOLDIER.
RAMS HORN BLASTS.
prosaic to the ideal. The seed of ro­ table, that she wished herself else­
mance? w-hi<*ti had hitherto blown past where.
General Baron Nogl, who was thrown Warning Notes Calling the WlekeX
him, had at length struck soil, and his
' Before she passed to the drawing­
to KepmlanW,
from his horse at Tokio and seriously
pleasant musing was evidence that It room he coutriwd to have a word with
injured, won undying fame through his
The good we
was exceedingly likely to germinate. her.
capture of Port Arthur from the Rus­
ought to do will
~
-- ——J sians.
As he banged do«-n his roll-top desk
“Kit," he whispered, “I’ve got orders
He is a Samurai, and is 57
A
never be done un­
thnt night he hoped that she would to s-nd Mr. Zalvo to the rightabout.”
years of age. ’ He- first achieved mili­
less we do It.
The Nite Is noted for the variety of tary renown in the war with China in
soon r.-pent her visit.
She looked at him and gmiled compla­
The devil may
ts Ash. Au expedition - sent by the 1S!M, when he also figured In the cap­
The’desire to see her again grew cently.
sometimes get a
stronger as the days p-tssed. In the
"I believe he wishes to speak to you.” British museum brought home 9,IMAJ ture of Port Arthur from the Chinese,
new hook and liar,
hours when business did not claim Ills she said. “See; he’s Coming now. Be specimens.
the men under his command storming
but be keeps on
thoughts her picture was a recurring gentle with him.”
I The bands Of female mummies successfully the famous It zeatin n fort.
Ashing with the
memory. On the seventh day after her
“Good evening. Sir Thomas,” John found in the tombs of Egypt are liter- After he had wrested Port Arthur from
same old bait
coinin’, hoping to hasten her call, he greeted him. “Are you for a smoke? ally covered with rings, in many In­ General Stoessel, In the last war. he
The man who
ventured to write a brief request for If s<>, I should like to Join you.”
stances there buuig troiu two to six on marched north with his troops, and prays to be nothing, generally I»-
the promised few designs.
“Very pleased,” said the baronet, every flnjjter.,
materially assisted In the capture of
Whenever you made a mistake, make
When her card was brought to him and, together, they made for the smoke-
| The Lafoden Railroad, which crosses Mululen, and tlie utter defeat of Kouro- it tench you something.
the following morning some new I room.
the Arctic circle In Scandinavia, en­ patkin. Baron Nogl Is noted as a strat­
It lias been the dreamers who haw*
strange sense of gladness seemed to
Ensconced In a retired corner of the
joys the reputation at till* present time egist and organizer, and has served as kept the world In motion.
permeate him, and he met her with cosy divan they puffed contemplatively
of being the northermost line of rails, Governor of Formosa. Before taking
hand outstretched and smiling face. nt their cigars for a spell In sileni'e.
Until fire touches gunpowder. Is i«
but this Is soon to be eclipsed by the
That s»s*oml visit proved the precursor Both h-id something vital to say, and
as well behaved as sweet milk.
construction of a line to Spitsbergen,
of many, with intervals which gradual­ both were equally at a loss how best
The man who would be considered
10 degrees farther north. The princi*
ly lessened, until the da,v dawned on to commence.
wise often turns out to be otherwise.
pal object of the new line is to reach
him when the hope that he might not
“This ‘Zalvo’ of yours Is a good
The lower we go down to help men.
| thing, eh?” observed Sir Thomas, tem- the <wal deposits which have been re-
ask in vain filled him with Joy.
the higher stand we are taking for
.ceutly
discovered
in
this
vicinity.
That morning, for the first time, she I porlzlng.
Christ.
The American Ethnological Society
had thrown side her Incognito and. ns
"Excellent, both for humanity unii
|
It Is better to have little talent and
announces that it is about to begin a
he learned her father’s name, despite pecuniarily for me,” returned John.
noble
purpose, than much talent and
series
of
publications
of
authentic
ma
­
the fact that be was a Baronet, a feel­
“Ah; costs about twopence and,
no purpose.
ing of distinct confidence «-as Instilled with the stamp, sells for Is. l%d. In- terial collected among native Alnerican
The Lord can work with dull tools,
within him. She had looked for some gredlents simple, but efficacious, The tribes. It Is pointed out that hither­
but he doesn't like to do it miy better
expression of surprlw*, instead of which rest Is advertising.’ ” rejoined Sir to little lias been collected in their
than we do.
he laughed, as a man laughs who is Thomas. “It strikes me as a very iuera- own language concerning the customs,
sure of utimate victor».
five thing «-hen once the name is beliefs and ideas of the natives. Yet
The golden opportunity conies in on
authentic* records of information given
“Your father looks down on trade known.”
the slow freight, and goes out on tba
I suppose," he said.obecoming sudden­
“You summarize the position falrlv by tbe Indians are regarded as of
lightning express.
ly serious “He would be angry if he correctly,” said John. “Ingredients slm- prime Importance for a thorough study
Baalam’s ass was an LL. D.. com-
kne«- that his daughter had soiled her nle, but remedy undoubtedly efficacious. of the ethnology and •early history of
pared to the man who knacks hi»
hands with business.”
Advertising may sell a bad thing once, the American continent. The Indians
brains out with a jug.
“Father is broad-minded.” she re- but it's only .the good ones which Sell are believed to possess much valuable
In the same breath In which Jesu»
turned. “He hasn’t always been a all the time.”
knowledge not yet recorded.
O
•
said, “Ivpt not your heart po troubled,”
Baronet, you know. But mother's
“I remember my mother possessed an
The difficulty now found In bonding
he also said’, “belleva”
proudest boast Is her i>edlgree. I’m old recipe for a salvt» which was won- together new and old concrete has been
’ It Is a hard to find a man who will
afraid h *r feelings would be terribly- lerful In Its effect,” went on Sir John. obviated by a recent patent. This bond
stand up like a man and take the blam*
outraged.”
“She used to dispense galipot riglrt and consists of mi extract of coal tar, used
for Ills own wrong doing.
“She wouldn’t recognize the ‘Zalvo’ ’eft, and «-as never so pleased qs «-hen instead of water, as the mixing agent
CENERAI. NIMII.
man, eh?” he said
“Freeze his pre­ she heard of an oiisttnate ease being for neat Portland c-emeht. -The mix­
sumption with an .ley glare through her •ured by it. but she guarded the secret ture is laid in one-eighth Inch to one- command at Port Arthur he participa­
Í BACKWOODS DENTISTRY. ¿
lorgnette, eh?”
of Its'composition most .zealously. A quarter Inch layers on the old concrete ted in the brilliant Japanese victories
at
Kinchow
and
Nausban
Hill.
After
She smiled at the picture..
dear old lady, my boy, though well over sutface, and Immediately followed by
the war opened he is alleged to have
"That reminds me," she said. “The 70, still healthy and -happy.-”
n»w concrete or-mortar. The inventor expressed the hope that none of his
fount of Inspiration «-111 div
‘•To such a dear old lady, tlie best claims the compound to be entirely in­
To be in the woods, miles from civ­
friend I ever knew, I owe the secret of soluble. and to form a complete and three sons would survive; and. strange ilization, with an aching tooth is an
bui-
to
say,
all
fell
victims
to
Russian
■'Zalvo,’" sqld John, qnlytiy.
monolithic, bunel between the old and
experience which befell Antoine, a
The Baronet eyed nbn tboughtfuly. new Works. It Is furnished to cus­ lets.
guide, who camped with Fred Mather,
There was that in his face that prom­ tomers free, they paying the-freight
AN INDIAN MOSES.
the author of “Men I Have Fished
ised a revelation.
. .
and cost of barrels, the cost being cov­
With.” When he had borne the pain as
“Tell me about It," he said, presently. ered by a certain royalty per square Creek Chief Would I.end III* Follow­ long as he could, he Insisted that Mr.
er» to Settle Mexico.
“I was a journalist at the time,” foot paid to the patentee of the proc- i
Chltto Ilarjo, better known as Crazy Mather pull the aching tooth,
said John. “Chance gave us acquaint- ■ ess.
“You gat pull dia toot,”, announced
Snake, a full-blooded Creek Indian, is
.nice, and she was good; enough to take
Reports gathered by the Japanese planning to become the Moses of his Autoine.
in Interest in me. I think some of the since the war with Russia indicate
“Antoine, I haven’t got a tool to pull
people, All his life
pleasantest hours of my life have been that northern Manchuria nossesses
he lias been fight- a tooth with, I can’t do it ; it’s no use
spent In her society. Having person­ large stores of valuable minerals, such
ing the government talking.”
lily proved the efficacy of her rwipa, as gold, silver, copper, lead and iron.
“Now look a here. See how I fix da
tn a vain endeavor
»»
I ventured to urge upon her that It Under the operation partly of Chinese
to prevent the ab­ bullet-mol' for pull a toot.” He showed
was selfish to keep ft from the commit- officials and partly W native companies
sorption o his me how he had ruined a good bullet­
nty, and, eventually, persuaded her to
and small capitalists the average an-
home and the lands wold to make a poor pair of forcCps.
give me the secret. The rest you know.
I looked the thing over with conflict­
uual output has been about $10,000,-
of bls - people by
.“WHY don ' t you speak to her ?”
From the very first sale she has been. (
000. But a large part of the deposits
the whites ami ing emotions. Here was an instrument
throe weeks. We’re off to Brighton to­ ‘he recipient of a royalty of one penny • have not even been
' touched,
’ ’
Gold is
now old anil b ro­ of torture which In expert hands might
per pot, which, I believe, she religiously
morrow.”
fbuud both in quartz and in placers.
ken In spirit he relieve suffering, but In mine seemed
“That reminds me,” he laughed. “I’m ilspenses In various charities, having The country drained by the lluifabo
sees the uselessness sure to Increase it. One thing was
IRAZT SNAKE.
feeling tlie want of a. holiday myself. a sufficient Income to keep her In com- River Is reported to be rich-in gold,*
of the struggle and certain—Antoine was In earnest.
Would you recommend Dr. Brighton In "ort. It waq only on tills conditloo that silver, copper, lead and coal. The min­ would flee from the long-dreaded In­
The offending tooth was a premolar
sfie would accept anything.
my case?”
•
eral regions are accessible by means evitable. For live years he has been on the rght sde of the lower jaw.
The suspicion which had b»»n Incited
’I think the treatment might benefit
Antoine laid himself on the floors and
of the Yalu, the lluifabo. the Sungari, the leader of the more discontented
In the mind of the Baronet was mw al­
you.” she Tot.umed, archly.
the Liao and other rivers and their and resentful Indians of the Five Civ- I sat with my back to the logs of the
“Whh'b hotel would you auggest?’ most certainly.
! ilized Trilies. Now lit' is trying to dis­ cabin. If they did not give way. I wm
"Where did you say the lady lived?", tributaries.
he asked.
all right. I pulled him up to me. put
I As everybody knows, tlie famous pose of nil the land in the Creek na­
“I should say the Metropole would he queried.
a wooden plug between his molars, to
tion
that
is
held
by
his
followers
and
of
Hatley,
the
brightest
of
all
“I did not mention the town," said comet
suit you-admirably," she replied.
keep Ills mouth open, planted both feet
lead
them
to
Mexico
to
colonize
there.
?on.ets known to pay periodical visits
' John, smiling. "It was .Leamington.”
« ' •
•
• . • .
•
•
on his shoulders, and pulled.
There
he
believes
they
can
lead
a
nat
­
neighborhood
of
the
sun,
is
ex-
"Ah’l” ejaculated Sir Thomas, and to the
Sir Thomas Carham was having, a
There was a howl as I pulled with
pected to reappear in the sky within a ural primitive life undisturbed by the
warm ten minutes. His lady was cri­ was silent.
arms and pushed with legs, but the
white
man.
Crazy
Snake
Is
70
years
Astronomers
all
over
the
•Presently he-knocked the ash from few years.
’dently highly Incensed.
world are now interested In the prob­ old, so that the task la-fore him, even “pullicans” slipped from my hands.
“The thing’s apparent,” she was s-i.v- his cigar, and loaning forward, *ild
They were all right as far as a grip’
lem of predicting the precise time of If neither the United States nor Mexi­
ipg. "The man is always with iier. abruptly:
co
Interposed
objection,
would
be
an on the tooth went, but they were not
its perihelion passage, or nearest ap­
Everybody in the hotel iq talking-about . “Willoway, why aren't you n Lord, a
made for a strong pull on their handles,
arduous
one.
proach to the sun. Several predictions
it. It must be stopjied nt owe. ami it Baronft, or at least a Knight?”
| Antoine rose and looked nt me, “mor»
have already been published. Tli<> lat­
Pardon for an Old Crlm^.
“I take It that I may. travel that
1
1» for you to settle bis pretensions.”
in sorrow than In anger.” and I hast-
est is that made by M< s-rs. Cromme-
“Ver;,' decent chap, my dear,” he ven­ road.” John responded gravely.
France has just pardoned a criminal ened to say, “The mold slipped in my
lin
and
Cowell
before
the
Royal
Astro
­
“I like you. Kang it, but I do!” »X-
tured, mildy. ’T must admit that I
who enjoyed a moment of notoriety band. There is no grip on the handles,
nomical Society in January. Calculat­
claimed Kir Thomas Impfrtalvely.
rather like him-.”
thirty-nine years ago. but who has since but if you can stand another go of this.
ing
the
probable
effects
of
the
inter
­
"That's good news,”- said John,
“Your liking or disliking (ins noth
been practically forgotten, He is Bercz- I will fix the thing so that I will bring
ference of the various planets with
Ing to do with It,” snapped -the lady encourages me to state the request
owsky, who In 18t!7 fired a pistol at the out the tfioth or your jaw-bone, What
the
cornel
’
s
progress
In
its
orbit,
they
"You know very well I have pther which I brought yon here to urge.”
Czar, Alexander II., as he was review* do you say?”
“What «-as the dear old lady’s think that the date of the next perihe­ Ing the French troops In the Bois de
views for Kitty
Saphend dotes -upon
Antoine merely nodded ament, nnd I
lion
vvill.fall
before
the
middle
of
May,
her, and I «111-not have the _ match na’me?” queried Sir Thomas.
Boulogne. ’
put
the bandies of the bullet-mold into
.1910. Tim last previous perihelion pas­
“Mrtk Carbarn,” returned John.
spolhsl. The way she gallivants pbout
The shot missed the Emperor. It the tire ami then turned them outward
sage of the comet-was in November,
"M.v mother’”
with this ’Zalvo’ fellow Is absolutely
struck a woman among the sjiectators, so they could not slip through my
“So" I believe,” said John noncha 1835.
disgusting.” '
I but she was only slightly wounded. The hhnds. When the handles were cool
“Why don’t you speak to her?” hi1 lantlv. “I want her to be my grand-
I would I«- assassin was a Polish work­ and all was ready. I looked at Antoine.
Ttry I.nve «he Kiwpre-».
mothel-Ip-law.” •
observed dryly.
I It Is doubtful if any royal consort is ingman. lie was sentenced to depor­ He rose and said, “Come on; I be all
“What.does Kit say?”
“What fin Insane.’question I” she re
more loved by her jieople than Is the tation and life imprisonment and was a-ready.” And lie lay on the floor In
“I have good reaso.n to bellqve she
turned. “The very way to make her
empress of Japan. Educated according shipped to New Caledonia in short or- the proper place.
think more of him. It Is fox yon to «■quid advocate tl)e legal reatlonsliip,” to feudal ideas and skilled in all the tier. He was really insane,
Tlie fact
Carefully pushing the "pulflcan»”
si>eak to him, and in-unmistakilble lan­ said John, calmly.
accomplishments befitting one of her so­ was recognized by the jailers He has down as far as I could get them. I
"Let’s go and talk to her mother.*”
guage. Zalv“o Indeed I”
cial eminence, her’majesty strongly fa­ grown worse as the years passed, His gripped the handles, straightened my
“Very f >qd stuff, my dear," he said said Sir Thomas, rising and taking hit vors the broadness of the new educa­ delusions took the form of Inventions, legs, and .with a snap the tooth came
"I’ve known it cure some obstinate arm.—Philadelphia Tqlegrnph.
tion for woman, and from her private one of which was a perpetual motion cut, and rti.v head made a tunk on the
cases, and. besides, it must be a mint
■
machine, and he used to try to bargain log behind that seemed hard enough to
purse gives large sums toward the
with
the governor of the pena> colony have left fl dent in either head or log.
to’ h]tn.”
'»»• <■»»•« Stone t’ncl.
maintenance of Women’s schools and
“Di»r.'t be asinine!” retorted the Ijidv,
Antoine Jumped up, and yelled with
Colonel Jamre P. Robertson, of tlie universities. During tlie war with- f°r freedom in exchange for the secret.
her generous form quivering with English army, declares in
For some years lie has enjoyed rela­ joy
He took the tooth and threw it
“Personal Russia- the empress visited the hospi­
anger. “Yon «111 please understand I Adventures" that the history
of his tals many times and every day passed tive freedom, on the island. On reach In the fire, and after a comforting rest
expect to solid him to the rightabout face alone would fill a chapter,
ing his 7<itli year tie was allowed to we went to bed.
Whet» hours making bandages. The effect of
this very night.”
live
in a little cottage outside tlie pris
quite a small boy be had the present these bandages u [ m > ii the wounded sol­
One Ihiy Lafe,
“Very «ell. my dear, very «ell,” he
of a toy cannon. He fonnd the cannon diers has been of deep Interest to med- on and to dispose of Ills own time. The
Ernest
had
been to a children’s par­
returned, as he pulled on his dress coat.
government still provided for bis sup­
nearly full of paper, and to get that leal and scientific men, for the soldiers
“I'l talk to him after dinner. Ah. there
port and he amused himself cultivat­ ty and eaten all that he could possibly
out he took a bit of strong wire, made honored by them seemed to rally un­
they come across the promenade. Hand­
ing mechanical projects.
Lately his put beneath his little blouse, but it
it red-hot, and tried to burn the paper der a peculiar mental Influence. Ail
some chap he looks, too. 1 like his face.
case was taken up by the Humanitarian nearly broke his heart to think he
out Batgf! went the cannon, and the other bandages were destroyed after
Got the right stamp. All right, my dear,
League and his complete pardon was could not do greater Justice to the
wire shot through the lobe of hl* left their first use; those made by the em-
don’t excite yourself. Go and dress;
the result, The Parisian papers speak feast of good things before him. A
I<ess were sterilized and used again
ear.
I'll talk to him.”
of it as a doubtful mercy. It Is hard bright idea came to him. Early next
When I was trying to blow up a for the simple reason of their effect on
around to the scene
The girl went by the bedroom door
to see what shelter he can find In morning he went
«•asp's nest, he continues, the mine of the recovery of tlie soldiers!—St. Paul
of
the
festivities,
and on being asked
to her own room humming a snatch of
France now except In an Insane asy-
coarse blasting powder Went off tn my Pioneer Press.
by Mrs. Johnson what he would like,
song.
lum.
I
_____ " I'd like all the things
replied,
Sir Thomas caught It, and stood fnce, and p<*ppere<l it fill! of unexjtect-
Her Monrulna.
(»nod Show Eirrpt—•
1 <*ouldn't eat yesterday, pleas«».”— Har­
stock-still, gazing with apparent ab­ «1 large grains of powder.
Maud—Why Is that lady over the
The show was all right, except there per’s Weekly.
1 went to my room, and with n gold
straction through the window.
way In black? Is she mourning for were too many guns, too many Indlffer
pin
dug
out
every
grain,
and
cleaned
“Sounds distinctly unpromising." he
So W aa th* Ti>.
[ent actors, too many climaxes, too
any one?
«aid to himself. “If I «till possess the the wound with my nail brush. It was
"IxMik here, waiter, I want a steak,’’
husband.
I
many
weak
lines
and
too
many
be-
Bess
—
Yes:
a
faculty of putting two and two together a most i>ainful operation, but If I had
Maud—I didn’t know she’d been mar- whiskered jokes; otherwise the show said the passenger on the dlniug car.
I’m afraid I’m In for a hard case. And. left the powder In I should have had a
“No steaks, nah.”
| was good
The best part was played
rled.
when I think of that tirlght specimen blue face for life.
“
Bring me a couple of chops, then.”
Bess No, but she’s mourning for a by the scenery, which said nothing, and
A fall which occurred when I was
of nobility, Saphead. I’m blessed If I
“No chops either, sub.”
.
the
worst
by
the
actor,
who
said
the
husband all the same.
feel Inclined to enthuse over the job. out hunting smashed the bone of my
“Well, I declare I thought this *»•
a | most The gallery was topheavy and
This other Is a man. I wish to good­ nose Into little bits, ana on another oc­
Of Co«*»».
a limited train?”
the
jiarquet
fair.
—
Emporia
Gazette.
ness Maria would tackle him herself.” casion I fell on a rock, and my two
I “It be, sab; everything’s limited
Professor (a little distracted)—I'm
The dinner through the Inane re­ front teeth came through the skin be­ gl*<l to see you. How’s your wife? I
The
«>»»•• Coat.
nah!”
marks of the Irrepressible Sapbead, low the under lip.
Conslcence, which make« cowards of
But I’ve only had one egg to e»t!”
“I regret it, professor, but I’m not
My mother used to say. "O laddie,
us all, 1» being abolished, but the dress
who dlr.ed with them, bored him ex­
“Yes, sah; de eggs Is limited, I« ri ,
married.”
ceedingly. The smiles with which his laddie, you’ll come to some awful death
“Ah, yes. Then of course your wife’s coaF which makes waiters of us nil, sah !”—Yonkers Statesman.
wits rewarded his feeble witticisms en­ If you d.*n't take more care of your­ still single.” —Fllegende Blatter.
, persists. I’uck.
|
An engaged couple l<s>k at ■*«<*! dKW
couraged him to shine, and he was well self!" But at the age of S4 I am able
er
’
s faults with their eye® cios«*d; af­
The only time a boy hss any use for
niBn npvpr fully realizes bow
content
Politeness compelled Kitty to take a twenty-mile run on my
ter
marriaje tlwy
ft
a
peace
amferr'nee
Is
when
be
realizes
homely
he
really
is
until
tie
baa
hla
pic-
and Iftinself to laterpolate a word now "bike.” and im without mark or dam-
It la up to him to cry 'Euuugiu'
tuca taken In a group.
sod Utau, but be fancied, as be noted ay» ob my face.
fi
»
Science
i&iverition
o
•Y
*
•»
&
o
Wh
z
s
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ft
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