Mutiny and Piracy. By CLARA TAYLOR CopvriQht. 19S. hy T. C ATcdure 0 Aunt Hannah Snow, wife of Captain Jabez Snow of Keunebunk, was almost as good a sailor as her husband. Sho hail gone with him to the West Indies on seven voyages ami had acted as mate and second mate. She could mend a sail, steer her trick, make or take in sail and use a quadrant as well as any one. or at least as well as any mate that ever sailed with the Hannah Snow, as the brig was named. Captain Snow ran between Boston and the West In dia islands, and the shippers of Bos ton came to know his wife and the way she could discipline a crew and han dle the craft. On a certain date the brig was load ing in Boston for a quick market. Ex tra help was put on to get the cargo aboard, and Captain Jabez signed a bond to gi t that cargo to its destlua lion within a certain number of days. barrinir hurricanes, waterspouts and other acts of Providence. The bond had not been signed more than an hour when he broke his leg. Nothing was surer than that he could not carry out ids agreement, and a great financial loss as well as many weeks of vexa tlous del.iy stared the couple in the face. They must either lind a captain to take charge -f the brig or forfeit the charter and pay a good round sum and Captain Jabez was wondering If a man could be found when his wife broke in on 1dm. "Jabez, you have broke your leg, am I don't want to be cross with you. but vou seem to forgit that I am still on earth." "No. I don't." he replied, "but 1 don't see what you can do in this case ex cept to git me back home and nurse me." "Well, I see where 1 can do some thing else, and I'm goin to do it too I'm goin' to take the Hannah to the West Indies and back and save our charter." "Have you lost your senses? "Not a bit of it. If I couldn't make that voyage I wouldn't be worth my salt. I know all the crew, and I'll have Bill Henderson for mate. We'll slip down there and be back ag'in before vcinr leir has bctrtm to knit. There needn't be any more talk about finding a captain. When Captain Jabez thought the matter over he was inclined to think that his wife could do all she said, but the consignees had to Ik consulted When Aunt Hannah went to them am stated the ease they did not raise a sin gie objection, and it was settled that she was to be Captain Hannah Snow for the vovane. It was only after the brig had left irt that the mate's meanness came to the surface. He had saibil with the craft on severa voyages and was a neighbor of the Snows at home. When the accident happened to Captain Jabez the mate ntirllT- lmnkl f.i .'lit iViTimi'i nil tYr ... . .r a r V -A a.w .-v ..a....... . a. v the voyage. He would have been dis tressed if any other captain had come aboard, but to be walked over by a woman, even though she was the cap tain's wife and a neighbor, was too much. Aunt Hannah saw that he was in the suHts. "Ix)ok here. Bill Henderson," she said, "it won't do you the least mite of gol to go on biting your tm:ue over this. I can captain this brig as well as Jahcx, and I'm going to take her out and hack." "You'll have her at the bottom be fore we strike the gulf stream," he re plied. "You never mind where I'll have her. inn 'tend to your knitting. We are to crack oc and make the best time we caa." A day later she found the mate carry lug too little sail, and an argument ensued. Later on she came on deck from her wateh below to find him chumming with the men. Two or three other things happened to put her out of temper, and she exercised the privilege of a captain by "breaking" the mate and sending him to the fo eastlc. When sin would replace him with the net bct man. the sailor ro fusl to take tlte plaee. The crew was with the mate. Aunt Hannah express ed her mind freely, and as a conse quence the crew refused to obey. The lrig was brought to the wind, sail tak en off, and tin w iuait was laughed at. She was told that not a man would do duty until tie mate was reinstated. "Then it's mutiny, is it?" she replic 1. "Very well. I'll let you know that you've got the wrong pig by the ear. I'll lose brig, cargo and everything els In the world beiore I'll give in." For a day and a night the brig inude no progress, and as the weather was fair she incurred no danger. The crew saw that the woman did not intend to give In, and it angered them. There was one among them who had read dozens of pirate books and always longed to sail under the black Hag. Things had never come right for him W-forc, but now he took advantage of the temper of the others in broach the subject. He was a ennd tamer, ana he held out such an alluring picture that even the mate, who was above the average man In Intelligence, agreed to go Into the pirate business with the others. This decision was communicated to Captain Hannah, who was wandering about unconcernedly. "Waal, Bill, that's all right," she re torted. "There's a rum find sugar load ed bark comln' our way, and you might begin on her. I've got a black shawl which I'll give you for a flag, and you just lay to, board that bark and give 'em fits.' "I'll either turn pirate or command this brig." stoutly asserted the ex mate. "Then It is a pirate you'll become, for you'll never git command liere." So a signal of distress was set on the brig, and when the bark came up and was hove to shy was boarded by nil , Snow lu .elr'ow'nj vawl Thev might have committed some foolish act and had to smart for lt but for the woman left boanL Just before they reached lh hoisted her black shawl as a signal and a warning. The crew of t he "nge saw that something was wrong, anil wnen the "pirates rU'.oniptc.l t i hoard they were met with c.i.i.i ;n bars and belaying pins. Some wer seized and flung into the sea after being well thutMiMMl. -Mill u-hen the bark resumed her voxaue .lull the vnwl r.u.ivii..l ... the brig with the discomfited "pirates" they were met at the gangway by Cap tain Hannah and an ancient fowling piece and told to shear oJT. Thev felt it wise to obey, and for seven long hours they tloated within a cable's length of the brig and took turns beg ging Aunt Ilaiuialfs pardon and en treating her forgiveness. When thev were half dead with thirst and hunger he invited them uboard, or, rather. permitted them to crawl over the rail and promise all sorts of good beha vior in future. The brig had lost valuable time, but to make up for it Providence gave her a gale from the right quarter and she moved along quickly. She overrun her time by a day, both going and coming. and never, after having their hurts at tended to. was there a more willing mate or crew. Occasionally Captain Hannah had something to say about mutiny and piracy and broken heads, but she made no note of it in the log book, and perhaps -she never told Cap tain Jabez. At least, when she had finished the return voyage, and he asked her how things had gone, she re plied: "I can't find the least mite of fault, and if you don't git around purty soon nie'n the old brig and them Boston shippers will have no use for you." THE LAW OF FINDING. fcaliiM All Save tllie Owner the Find, er'ii Title 1 1'erfect. Iii common law finding is a qualified louree of title to goods and chattels. Brietly. the law Is that the finder has n clear title against all the world, except iug the owner. The proprietor of a conch or a railroad car or a ship has no right to demand property found on h s pn-uilses. Such proprietors may make, in regard to lost articles, regulations which will bind their employees, but they cannot bind the public. The law of finding was declared by the king's bench more than a hundred years ago (when it was the supreme court of common law In England) as follows: A person found a wallet containing a sum of money on a shop tloor. He handed the wallet and contents to the .shopkeeper to be returned to the own er. After three years, during wlilch the owner did not call for his property, the finder demanded of the shopkeeper the wallet and the money. The latter refused to deliver them upon the ground that they were found o: his prei::! s-s. The finder then sued the shopkeeper, and ii. was held, as st ited above, that, against all the world save the owner, the title of the finder Is per fect. The tinder has indeed been held to stand in the place of the owuer. Thus A prevailed lu an action against Ii. who found an article which A had orig.naliy found, but subsequently lost. The police have no especial rights in reicard to articles lost unless these right-, are conferred by statute. Receiv ers of articles found are trustees for the owner or finder, lu the absence of special statute tliej nave no power to keep an article against the finder any more than a finder has to retain an ar ticle against the owner. A finder must, however, use every reasonable means to discover the own er of found goodi. before appropriat ing them to his own use. It has been declared that if the finder knows the owner or knows that he can discover him he is guilty of larceny In keeping or appropriating to himself the arti cles found. It Hccnll..l the Honeymoon. Here is a quaint little story told of a young couple upon their wedding trip, crossing from Doer to Calais. Jenny had grown tired and sickly on deck, and James had led her to the saloon below, lovingly wrapping her up lu a Scotch plaid In a snug looking corner. He then went and fetched her some eau de cologne and was not less lavish of endearing words until until he found he had made a mistake. His wife had moved to another cor ner of the saloon more free from drafts, and an elderly woman with Just the same sort of plaid had taken her place. Realizing the condition of af fairs. James dropped the cologne bottle and tied. Later he induced his wife to go and apologize to the woman he had unwittingly lavished tenderness upon, and Jenny went. ".My dear," said the elderly woman tearfully, "don't apologize. It was nice to be called such sweet names. It reminded me of my honeymoon time. It's many a long year since my John had a tender word for me." John never meant to be unkind and probably did love his wife. Only, like too many other married men, lie fan cied that the love which made for itself speech without measure before marriage had no need to break silence afleiu aril. London Tit-Bits. Tlie Glnut'N Chair. In Dolgelly, in the north of Wales, there is a mountain celebrated In folk lore, poetry and song as Cader Idris, or Idris' Chair. The hollow, eouchlike excavation on the top of the mountain has given the peak Its name. According to the Welsh bards, the depression was caitM'd by the giant Idris long using It a a chair. There is a local tradition in north Wales that whoever pusses the night in the (.hint's Chair will be found 111" the morning either dead, crazy or endowed with the highest poutlcal as pirations. Idris is variously represent ed in Welsh tradition as a prince, magi cian, sorcerer and astronomer, the only thing on which all authorities agree be ing his immense stature. The "Lake of the Three Pebbles," which lies at j ,,. fout or t,t. (Jiaut's Chair, contains three large blocks of stone, which Idris is said to have once poured out of his boots. The smallest of these stones will weigh a ton and n half. Corroboration. Mrs. Biff sou My husband Is really the neatest man I ever saw! Mr. Bangs -I should say he was: lou ougui 10 see the way he cleaned me upl- ul "f Anglesey's seat, Elizabethan WOMAN AND FASHION An Attractive XeKlljjee. Negligees are in demand at all -seasons of the year, but especially so dur ing the summer mouths, when the need for relaxation Is great. Illustrated is a most attractive one made of pretty lawn with simple trimming of em broldered banding, which allows a SUKPLICE XEOL1QEE. choice of puffed or loose sleeves. The slightly open neck means comfort, coolness and stle all In one. and it can be belted with a ribbon or left free, as preferred. Whether made with the full or puffed sleeves. It is emi nently simple and can be laundered with ease, for which reason it Is espe cially well adapted to cotton and linen materials. The quantity of material required for the medium size is 4-.j yards 117, 4 yards 32 or li yards -l-l inches wide, with 4 yards of banding and 1! yards of embroidery for frills. Coneernlnjr Illne. l'astel blue Is a leader. Sky blue holds its own. Turquoise will not down. Wedgwood blue Is beautiful. Periwinkle is daintily pretty. Cadet blue is very good style. Plumbago is a deep light blue. Gobelin is never out of fashion. Delft is very much liked this summer. Steel blue is a becoming shade to many. China blue Is one of the good strong blues. Saxon. Alice and Dresden express the new clear medium blue. Kni.li limablc I.lnen Color.. Linen holds its own. especially in the long coat suits, which are practical and becoming. The plaited skirts are pop ular and pretty, but the circular skirt with rows of very narrow stitched bands around the bottom Is growing in favor 011 account of its greater dura- bllitv. The favorite color Is of course white, but gray, blue. pink, mauve. green and the natural color are seen coats are in plain tailored styles, with colored velvet collars. The Vokuc of Hlhhon. Ribbon forms one of the important items In the dress question now. The plnln styles are quite as effective on fancy stuffs as are the fancy on the plain materials. They are shirred and plaited unmercifully and are used In the most unique forms, but neverthe less they are pretty. For it Small Ctrl. The design here shown should be useful by way of suggestion as well as example as to how trimmings should be the expression of character In clothes without overdoing it. The yoke Is tucked in sunburst ef fect, and the fullness at the waist Is TUCKUD I'llOCK. taken up In tiny tucks In frout and back. The addition of a sash fasten ing with little rosettes where the tucks end Is quite a pretty idea, although a belt or a strap similar to that on the shoulder would be as effective on wash dresses. Tert. Miss Tot tie Auntie, make Johnnv quit saying mean things to me. Aunt Lottie Mercy, child! You're both of you bad children. What's he been saying now? Miss Tottle He savs j I've a worse temper'n you have. Ex , change. Their Deceit. Grayce What are you crying about? Gladys My new hat isn't becoming. All the girls Grayce Say it isn't? ' Gladys No. Boo-hoo. They say it is! I Louisville Courier-Journal. 1 WASHINGTON LETTER Special Correspondence. The mackerel of the New England coast ai changing their habib much that the New England people are alarmed and have appealed to the pres i -cut to direct the fish commission to make an investigation to determine what is the matter witli the fish. Mi gration hs become a fad with the l.-Ji. which now go away and stay at Mine unknown place for a good part of the year. The New England people want to keep in touch with the fish. The matter was presented to the presi dent by W. II. Jordan, the collector of the port of Gloucester, Mass., and Benjamin A. Smith of the board of trade at Gloucester. It Is feared by some of the Gloucester fishermen that the mackerel may finally disappear and find some other home besides the New England const. Silver Service For the Teiuie.si.ee. The battleship Tennessee, which Rep resentative Gaines of Tennessee said the president regarded as the most powerful battleship in any fleet in the world, will receive a handsome silver service at a southern port. President Roosevelt wrote a brief note to the navy department directing that when the Tennessee is completed and Is ready to receive the sliver service It be sent to New Orleans for this purpose. The note was given to Representative John Wesley Gaines of Tennessee, who called on the president to ask that the vessel be sent to a southern port to re ceive the service. New Orleans was preferred, but any southern port would have answered. Mr. Gaines said the service to be presented to the ship is to be one of the finest in the navy. There will be engraved upon the silver a brief history of the state. The Army I nlforui. The law olllccrs of the war depart ment hnve recently discovered, to their surprise and disgust, there Is no law In which they can pr -tidbit any person from wearing the ngulation uniform of the army or navy if such person cares to wear it. The war department has been wres tling with the case of an army otlicer who was permitted to resign "for the good of the service." but who still per sists In wearing the uniform of his rank. It was first believed that he would be compelled to discard the hon orable shoulder straps, but after the law was carefully studied It was found there was no provWon under which such action could be taken. As the matter now stands any civil ian with the bad taste so to do and the money with which to pay for It can wear the uniform of the lieuten ant general of the army, although there Is but one man In the country entitled to wear that particular dress. The I'eithlon Olllce. Commissioner Warner of the pension bureau has under contemplation an in novationthat of changing the present method of keeping the records of claim ants fo: pension In large, cumbersome books to the card system. The magni tude of this change can in a measure be understood when it is known that the names of more than a million sol diers, with the companies and regi ments In which they served, must be copied from the old books upon carets by hand. These cards will be placed In the latest Improved file cases in al phabetical order, thereby enabling the bureau to find a claim when only the name of the claimant Is kuown. This transfer of the records can be carried on without Interfering in any way with the current work of the bu reau. The services of clerks writing plain and legible hands will be utilized, and the actual extra expense will be the small amount of money to be ex uended for cards and file cases. Chief Justice Not to HcmIkii. It Is stated that Chief Justice Fuller has no Intention of resigning his posi tion. He has frequently told friends and neighbors that no chief justice of the supreme court has ever reslgued and that he does not intend to do so. his duties not being so onerous as to require the rest that would come from complete severance of official ties. If this attitude Is maintained Secretary Taft may never become chief Justice. Tuxkepree Institute. The president will spend the best part of Oct 123 at Tuskegee institute, and a great exhibition of the institu tion and Us students will be arranged for. A long procession of floats and other dtsplavs will pass before tho president, renresentimr the work of tho institution. A similar exhibition given upon the occasion of the was visit to Tuskegee made by President McKlnley In December, IS'JT. FlreproollnK of IlooU. Aii Interesting experiment was made recently In the blank division of the bindery of the government printing ... .- , i..L r,.," imni; 111 iuu 111 qji uuuiif-, ui uuuii.t. j.hu treasury department was responsible j v. ..... -.i.... IU1 tUU lllllllll UI UL'l , 4 1111.11 ( U1131.H1.U ... , lu the substitution of a prepared ashes- j r . . , , , 1 11 1 UiB for the binders' boards and back- ing, the edges being coated with a fire proof liquid. Extciiftion of the Capitol. Every patriotic American citizen will hope that no obstacle will Intrude In the path of an extension of the east front of the capitol at Washington In accord with the plans which have been reported favorably by a Joint commis sion of the senato and house. For several generations tills has been a project dear to the heart of almost every congress and always dear to the heart of every lover of art In arch itecture who could not look at the grand building on "the hill" without a feeling of profound regret that so Im posing a pile should be conspicuous in one great defect, that the magnificent dome should seem, from the eastern point of view, to be toppling over for lack of a proper and harmonious ped- estal. CARL SCHOFIELD. Hud One Too Mnn Hlninclf. "Serves him right!" murmured Mrs. Henpeck. looking up from the paper in which she had been reading of the ar rest of a bigamist. "Serves who right?' asked Henpeck. "Oh, a man who took one wife too many." "My! Maybe they'H be after 1110 next." Philadelphia Ledger. A township to be called Livingstone Is being establi.-hid a few miles from Victoria falls. The Cape to Cairo rail wav will pass it. NEW SHORT STORIES An .-.fTectlve Hetort. Judge Emory Speer, who presides over the 1 n;tc.i Mates circuit ami dis trict courts for the southern district of Georgia, is the possessor of a nimble and facile wit, says the Philadelphia Saturday Evening Post. In earlier days, before he had attained the er mine. Judge Speer was a politician ami a power on the stump. Short lv after reconstruction he ran against Allen D. Candler for congress. Speer was a Republican, and his pol itics sufficed to bring him unpopular ity among a large majorltv of the white population. It was his wit, his good humor and his unfailing courage that carried him through the campaign without a serious difference and final ly brought him to victory. On one occasion when the young can didate was addressing a very Demo- "SIR, YOU Alti: A DEMAtSOOl'E." era tie and hostile audience a brawny countryman was observed fighting his way through the crowd to 1 lie sp'-ak er's rostrum. It was evident that hi had spent the preceding night with John Barleycorn, for his el-th-'s were rumpled, his hair disheveled and hi face of a fiery red that rivaled noonday sun In brilliancy. Shaking a belligerent fist under the nose of the orator, he exclaimed: "Sir, you are a demagogue!" The crowd howled, but Speer wa not disturbed. He waited for the noise to subside and then, with a smile and lu a tone of entire good humor, re joined: "And you, sir, if you would wrap a few wisps of straw about you. would be a demijohn." The delighted audience roared with appreciative laughter, and the discoui flted patriot slunk away. It is said that in no voting precinct of the ills- lrlr rQ Rnonr'u tnnlnrltv lurircr than that in which this happy retort asj macie I Said In "WnshliiRton. At one of the recent White House receptions there was a little case of rapier thrusting between two ladies, and It was delightfully entertaining to those who saw and heard. There Is a famous man in Washing ton, one who came from the plain peo ple and who continues as one of them. He has a beautiful daughter of aristo cratic tendencies who has dug up a family tree somehow or other and who affects superiority which slfe does not possess In any sense. The wife of a congressman from a western state was Introduced to the young lady and pleasantly said: "I have met with your distinguished father, Miss ." "1 dare say," replied the young lady languidly. "Papa in his position meets all sorts of people." The western lady flushed and flash ed back Instantly, "I should suppose so. especially when he Is at home." Llpplncott's. The Dominie's Mare. Senator Deboe of Kentucky tells uu interesting story concerning a school- teacuer in nis suite who was uibo u preacher, says tho Pittsburg Dispatch. t . . 1 f . 4 . 4 1 He loved horses and dogs, and ho was ll owner of n trotter with a good rec ord for speed. One Friday afternoon before dismissing the school he ad dressed the boys thus: "Now, boys, I suppose you all know that there will bo some horse racing tAninftntt I f T'rtll rrrt f 4 lift v ; w 7 u J, , " races. Ihe track Is no place for boys. But, boys, If you do go to the races J'ln't you do any betting. It Is not .... 1 right to wag( ,-agcr money on horses. But, boys, If you do go nnd If you do bet ! . . . t-v ininu wiiai i leu ,uu ucl on lii;vu Abernathy's mare. This Is a straight tlii." And the mare won too. She was the old prea her-schoolteacher's thorough bred under another name. Fltz-IIncrh Lcp'n Sonne of Humor. "The lamented Fltz-Uugh Lee had a good sense of humor," remarked his warm personal friend, General Jack Hayes, at the Shoreham. "When General Lee, a few weeks prior to his death, as president of tho Jamestown Exposition association, got a telegram from Governor Pennypack er of Pennsylvania that the legislature of that state had made a generuus ap propriation to that enterprise General Lee wired him back as follows: "'Sincere thanks. I solemnly prom ise never more to draw my sword on j thp of ie,isvlviinla except In its ! rtereILSe -Washington Post. IHn Xcw Vocntlon. "John's home from college?" "Yes." "What's he goin' to do now?" "Well, 'twixt you an me I think he's jest about decided to loaf around an' be one o' these here Incomprehensible geniuses!" Atlanta Constitution. Home Sonne. "Vnn. 1. -'.. ,.t- I mnltn in 11 I ui. n bOk it mil i icaiij villi horse sense.' " j "How, for Instance?" "He never phia Tress. bets on one." Phlladel CHOICE MISCELLANY Cuckoos' Ehk. Mr. Hurt of Christchurch, Hamp shire, who has made a lifelong study of British birds, has In his fascinating collection a large number of cuckoos' eggs, each in the nest and with the clutch in which they were deposited, and in almost every case the intrud er's egg is an exact imitation of the rightful eggs, only a size larger. Mr. Hart is convinced that the female cuckoo inspects the eggs in the nest she has chosen before laying her own egg and that her retinal Impression af fects lhe"coloratioii of the egg. In one instance the cuckoo chose the nest of 1 small bird, the name of which I have forgotten, whose nest was a closely woven ball with a tiny hole for en trance. In this case the alien egg was pure white, the cuckoo being unable to see into the bottom of the nest and her mind on the subject being there fore a blank. The plumage of the adult cuckoo is very much like that of hawks, while the young are lndeli- uit Iy speckled and blurred, the sup posed reason -being that no small bird would d ire to feed what It took to be a young nawu in its nest, so tne click. 10 has still another charge of mean duplicity against it in addition to the familiar ones. London Outlook. Wealth of an Indian Itnjah. It Is believed that Sayajl Roo, the rajah of Raroda, is the possessor of wealth equal if not superior to that of John D. Rockefeller. He was educat ed In an English university, and his people are well governed. Much of his vast riches Is In the form of precious stones. His wife owns the most fa mous diamond necklace In the world. It is made up of 200 stones, each the size of n hazelnut. She also has a col laret of 500 perfect diamonds, none less than twenty carats. In the treas ure chamber Is a carpet four square yards In surface made up entirely of ropes of diamonds, pearls and rubles. It required $4,000,000 worth of gems and three years of labor. The long corridors of the palace are lined with marbles and onyx of incalculable val ue. The palace is steam heated, and electric elevators nro placed at fre quent intervals. Bronzes, paintings, statuary, all imported and worth many millions of dollars, are scattered throughout the royal dwelling. Forcing Spider to Spin. Certain green ants In Queensland, which also make their nests of leaves and flowers spun together, are said to keep spiders to spin for them. Whether these latter do It spontaneously or re quire to be held as the lorvae of the other species does not seem to have been determined. In the devices of these ants there is surely one of na ture's hints to human Inventors. Since the days of the spider artist In the I'niversity of Lagado, spider silk has been a dream. The difficulty of its re alization has been chiefly the pugna cious nature of the spider, which pre vents their being kept together. But a machine has been Invented which seems to overcome the difficulty. It Is described as a sort of frame contain ing twenty-four miniature guillotines, the blunt knives of which descend on ,ne w,ij!5t3 OI tuu -"Phiers and hold them fast. A number or tue uireaus are secured together on u hook and slowlv drawn out. London Globe. Demand on u I'oxfoflice. The postoffi.ee at Chester, Pa., is re - garded by some people as an accom modation bureau. One man last week asked for a letter carrier's pouch, say ing he wanted it for a game bag.-while another could not comprehend why he should be refused tho use of the night collector's horse and wagon. A day or two ago Postmaster John A. Wallace was called from his private ofllce Into the corridor of the building nnd was confronted by a strange woman, who asked for the loan of 50 cents. "But why do you come to me for such a fa vor?" asked the surprised official. "Why don't you see some of your friends? You are an entire stranger to me." "That may be," replied the caller, with rare naivete, "but I came to see you because I'm a regular cus tomer of this ofllce." This was too much for the postmaster, who reached Into his pocket for the half dollar. Philadelphia Record. t'.i I on ill ni; ConI Car In Cleveland. The gondolas are brought direct to the coal dock and ore then hoisted to a great height, trucks nnd all, the giant crane first lifting the heavy car to the proper position and then quickly turn ing it over, as a mother turns over her small boy for a spanking. The coal Is Instantly dropped Into the hold of the waiting vessel, the car returned to tho rails and sent to tho ore dock to be filled with Lake Superior Iron. These unloaders, under ordinary con ditions, can unload 500 cars of coal every day. The No. I machine handled the biggest tonnage of coal of any ma chine on the great lakes during the season of 10o:i. The coal was trans ferred at an average cost of 4 cents a ton. Including the cost of mainte nance and depreciation of the plant. Erie Railroad Employees' Magazine. "RnRKliiB" In the Ilrltlnh Army. A recent case of "ragging" on board the British cruiser Kent has been promptly followed by the supersession of Captain Douglas A. Gatnblo, her commander, who has been coinpuJso rlly retired on half pay for allowing such an occurrence on his ship, and by the punishment of others concerned in tiie affair. The "ragging" occurred in the gun room, where tlio m.'dshlp men attempted to strip and flog nn un popular comrade. The latter promptly drew a revolver nnd shot one of the midshipmen In the mouth. Tho ad miralty announces that It Is determined to put down "ragging." On Other Xlsrht. Mr. Good thing How does your sister like the engagement ring I gave her, Bobby? Her Young Brother Well, it's a little too small. She has an awful hard time getting It off when the other fellows call! Exchange. Shnttered Ideal. "Pnw, what docs It mean whero It says here that the girl's ideal was shut tered?" "Why, It means she found that she could marry a wealthier man." Detroit Tribune. HUMOR OF THE HOUR deponed. "And you told me, Reginald," whis pered the bride through her tears as the carriage whirled them away to the railway station, "that you had never before been married." "Why. my angel, I never have," he asserted, albeit a guilty flush swept to his forehead. "And," she continued, her sobs be coming more evident, "I trusted you, although you were a stranger when I met you, but now your perfidy Is un masked. Gh, why should things be so?" "What in the world makes you think su h a thing;" "If you never had been married, how could you keep step so perfectly with the wedding march? No man who hasn't had lots of practice can walk down the aisle and be self pos sessed while it is being played." Chb cago Tribune. Even Then. Just then the ark came very near turning turtle. "What on earth caused the commo tion?" gasped Mr. Noah. "Earthquake under the water?" "No." replied Noah. "One of the ele phants jiibt sighted a peanut floating by and made a lunge for It." Which all goes to show It Is always best to take a bag of peanuts along wherever one goes. Chicago News. TrjliiK to Keep Up. -Do you think there will be any se rious trouble between Norway and Sweden?" "I hope not," answered the pallid man with blue glasses. ' I've just got through struggling with Spanish, Rus sian and Japanese. I don't feel strong enough to tackle Scandinavian yet" Washington Star. Of Xo Coimeuucnce. After the silence had begun to be awkward lw cleared his throat and said: "I don't think. Miss DImpleton" "Oh, I know you don't," she hastily replied, "but It doesn't really matter. Isn't the moon Just lovely tonight?" Chicago Record-Herald. DIasnonla. Young Phv sician Your lips are ex- 1 ceptloiially large and peculiarly shaped. You are doubtless a musician? Patient Correct. Young Physician And may I oak what instrument you play? Patient Bass drum! An lrii nl. He Yes, Dora trusts me. I am sure of it, because she admitted her age to me. She Wasn't that clever of her? He How do you mean? She Why er clever to make you believe it! Detroit Free Press. A Hint to the Poets. "That new poet Is at last convinced that there's money In the literary busi ness." "Sold a poem, has he?" "No: had his hair cut and sold it to the barber for a sofa pillow." Atlanta Constitution. Tivo View. Musician (Ironically) I am afraid my music is disturbing the people who are talking over there. Hostess Dear me! I never thought of that. Don't play so loudly. New York Weekly. An Enny Job. Mrs. Crawford Why won't your hus band buy you an auto? Mrs. Crabsbaw He says we can run into debt fast enough now without em ploying machinery. Puck. Surprised. "Ella gets her beautiful complexion from her mother." "Is her mother a chemist?" Cleve land Plain Dealer. Woman'H Intuition. Jim What is woman's Intuition any how? I Jack It is that quality In a wife that makes her husband discharge a pretty" stenographer. New York Press. The Great Divide. Freddie What's a pedestrian, dad? Cobwlggcr He's a man who can't afford an auto. New York Times. The I.ny of the Hen. I love the enrol of tho lark. The starling's thrllllnK note. Tho voice of nlghtlngalo at dork Which through the air will float: I llko the linnet's tuno so awect. Tho thrush sons In tho glen. But better far I love to cat The fresh lay of the hen. St. Louis Republic Sldetrneked. "I was looking about In Bargen's inlllinery department today," began the scheming wife, "and I saw the sweet est thing" "Yes." Interrupted her foxy husband, "that's a great Idea of Bargen's to put mirrors all around where you women congregate.' Exchange. Be kind the rich. They may not be rich always.-Florldn Tlmes-Dulon. The confidant of my vices Is my mas- ter though he were my valet. Goethe.