IU'nDOX RECORDER.
INVESTING MONEY.
R,. Muo of Your Scheme Hefore You
ItisU Your S:vIiikn.
H-i't tie vourself r your money up.
Hunt risk 'all your savings in any
;eh.i:!e. no mailer how much it may
iromiM-. Don't Invest your hard osiru
1 nioiicv in anything without fust
making ;ithor.ugh ami searching In
virstitration. Do not he misled hy tboso
who tell vou that it is "now or never"
nnd that !f you wait you are liable to
Imm' the best thing that ever eame to
nu. Make up your mind that it" you
i,;,. vi.ur mcney you will not lose your
head awl that you will not invest in
i,u thing until you thoroughly undor
unmi all about it. There are plenty
tf go,l things waiting. If you miss
ie there aie hundreds of others, Peo
I ! w;M tell you that the opportunity
will sro ly ami you will lose a gresit
rhattic to make money if you do not
act promptly. Rut take your time and
investigate. Make it a east iron rule
never l invest in any enterprise until
vu have goac to the very bottom of it.
and if It Is not so sound that level
headed men will put money in it do not
t.mch it. Th' habit of investigating
before you mil irk in any business will
be a happiness proieetor and an ambi
tion proledor . s well. Orison Swell
Marden in Suec s.
BITING THE THUMB.
It Iced to lie Considered a Pledge of
Mortal ItcrviiKc.
in "Romeo and Juliet" the servants
of Capulet and .Montague begin a quar
rel by one biting his thumb at the oth
ers. I'ommentators have regarded this
act as an insult, quoting the following
passage from Ieeker"s "Dead Term:"
"What swearing is there, what shoul
dering, what jostling, what jeering,
what biting of thumbs to beget quar
rei. Sir Walter Scott, however, in a note
to the "Lay of the Last .Minstrel." says.
"To bite the thumb or the glove seems
not to have been considered upon the
border as a gesture of contempt,
though so used by Shakespeare, but as
a pledtre of mortal revenue." it was
tints accounted to be a solemn assur
ance that at the proper lime the sword
siiuld settle the dispute or purge the
oiTettse.
Something of the sort may have pre
vailed among the Romans, for it is
thought that the Latin judHceri. to
promise, is derived from poilex. the
thumb.
PRISONS OF SILENCE.
WIutp Convict Eut Wear Shrouds
and Sleep Heside Colli uu.
Kntoml-cd In a grim castle on the
outskirts of Lisbon are some f the
most miserable men on earth. These
are the inmates of Portugal's deadly
prisons of silence. In this building ev
erything tint human ingenuity can
siiffuest to render the lives of its pris
oners a horrible, mnddci.iug torture is
done. The corridors, piled tier on tier
live stories high, extend from a com
mon center like the spokes of a huge
ui"'- iija-j ii" oii ii.i. .
t MML . O . ...... ......1.
like, and within each stands a COrftn.
The prison garb is a shroud. The at
tendants creep about in felt slippers.
No one is allowed to utter a word.
The doors are unlocked, and the half
a thousand wretches march out. cloth
ed iu shtvr.ds and witii faces covered
Hy masks, for it is a part of this
hklfoits punishment that none may
look upon tlie countenances of his fel
low prisoners. Few of them endure
this tiM'ture for more than ten years.
A Five I:i' I.ove Story.
At the present time wo aie always
talking alut the rush and hurry of
the twentieth century. Are we really
so rapid as wo think wc are? Vr
talnly few girls of fourteen have any
thing like the amount of experience
and emotion in many weeks of life that
Juliet. Shakespeare's heroine, had
eratutud into live days and a half.
The lime is thus apportioned: On
Sunday the ball took place, and on
Monday Romeo and Juliet were mar
ried. On Tuesday Juliet took the
draft, and on Wednesday she was
placed in the tomb, on Thursday Po
nieu returned, and on Friday the hap
less pair committed suicide.
The JitpiinoHc Ilnliy.
Tin. Japanese baby's head is shaved
in a eurkMfcs fashion, and never, under
any circumstances, does the mother or
baby wear a hat or bonnet. Nor does
he wear shoes, even iu the coldest
weather, but his shaven head and his
pi'ik toes peep out from the mother's
garments, and he rides pickapack,
strapped on tightly, happy, chubby,
smiling always and dressed, when he
is a Ho wetl to tret out of the hindimr
garments, in the most dainty of kimo
nos, all embroidered and painted and
decorated with the designs winch are
supposed to typify the linal trade or
occupation of the infant.
A 1 rat In (..vtu.
"1 lost tny foot in the war," said the
tramp, "and I'm trying to raise enough
money to get out to California."
"What do you want to tro to Califor
nia for";" asked the woman at the door.
"Oh. I've heard that there are things
which grow a foot in a day out there."
IV! ml mill.
"I never knew till now why this was
Kiieh a windy country." said the bright
little girl traveling through Illinois.
"And have you discovered why;"
asked her father.
"Of course. See all the windmills on
these farms we're passing." Philadej.
phia Ledger.
IIU Method.
Mrs. Xewpop Why don't you slop
whipping the child? You make it hol
ler. .Mr. Nou-pop I'm licking It to
make it stop hollering.- 'hicago Jour
nal. Chum- I'or Scirnnv.
Rrown d-okcr's down with brain fe
ver. Tile doctor says if he recovers his
mind will he a blank. Green- I'm sor
ry to hear that. He owes me ?lo.
That they are sinners few arc willing
to deny; that they are sinning few are
ready to admit.
POLLY LARKIlfT
1 left you at Willits last week with a
promise to got to Slcrwood valley in
this week's issue. "Change for Sher
wiHd," announced the genial con
ductor, Hobcrt I'.rown, who had kindly
given me a great deal of information in
regard to the attractive features of this
pici.iresquc run from I'kiali to Wdlils.
The passengers who desired to go
through to Sherwood the same day
were given an hour at Willits for din
ner. Most of them took advantage of
the opportunity ami dined at one of the
various hotels before continuing their
jounuy northward. It was again my
good foituneto stop at tho Hotel Wil
lits, the finest hotel north of San Fran
cisco excepting the Motel llafael. Its
equipments arc perfect and it is an
ideal place for summer sojourners, and,
judging from the number of guests
resting, chatting, reading ami even
knitting beautiful llcecy wools into
dainty -hawls by the pretty summer
girls, who were scattered about in the
easy chairs on tin-broad verandas with
which this hotel i blessed, the attrac
tions aud advantages of this abiding
place for a season is no longer a secret,
(iuosls who came for a week length
ened their stay into double the time
ami then sighed to think that the sum
mer vacation had ended while they
murmured:
Ti -morrow, to -day and yesterday.
So i ut'- the Ih'uu: fill world away."
The hotel this season is under the man
agement of W. tL (Jraham V Co., and
very popular are mine hosts, W. C
Craham and William Chambcrluin.
K very thing possible is done for the
comfort and pleasure of the guests.
They have a line bow ling alley, which
is thoroughly enjoyed by young and
old. A lineswimming pond is another
attraction, and a model tenuis court
and croquet ground arc being made
ready. One of the principal features of
enjoyment, howcvei, is horseback rid
ing, and bevies of young people enjoy
this healthy exercise, visiting the hills
and enjoying the picturesque scenery
which abound on all sides. In fact,
you cannot get away from it, for there
are no treeles- sunburned hills and
nothing to break the monotony in this
mountainous country. If you want a
delightful walk there is a spring pos
sessing all the mineral elements, clear
:is crystal ami a- cold as ice, within a
short distance of the hotel, and a little
farther out-a line soda spring. Then
there is a jaunt to .Muir's mill, once
the leading lumber mill in this part of
the county. In the opposite direction
lie- the Diamond D mill of the North
western Uedwood Company, which is
l he biggest logging camp iu California
and theniost complete ami best equipp
ed mill in the State. Frequent!; the
gtUJs of !i;c Itf.t.-! c:rj:ry a fifteen min
utes' ride on the train, which takes
them into the heart of this great lum
ber district, which is a bu-y little
world of its own and a sight well worth
the seeing and one of which you never
tire. This great hotel, so thoroughly
and perfectly managed, is certainly an
ideal spot to summer in. with its pic
turesque scenery, pure mountain air
and its fishing and hunting to woo the
anglers and nimrod- from the wear
and tear of business life.
Hut 1 forgot. We arc going to Sher
wood valley and have no time to
loiter at Willits. A number of people
are on the train, but most of them get
oll'at .Millville. This section of the big
lumber mills lias grown so extensively
in regard to population that it has been
dignilicii by the name of Millville. A
numlior of pretty cottages, beside the
rustic redwood holm's of the hand,
have been erected on the hillsides of
tin- pretty place, where the whirr m'
machinery is heard night and day as it
saw-, planes, outs and finishes the
beautiful redwood timber making it
ready for the market. Mere the pond
is filled with log-, many of them the
mournful reminders of what were but
lately giants of the redwood forests.
These gigantic monarchs, after hundred-of
years' existence iu these great
temples of nature are sacrificed by the
hand of man who cares not for their
grandeur, beauty and age, their value
to him being reckoned iu feet and cords,
and how much coin will be produced.
What an ignominious fall!
Leaving Millville we speed down to
Sherwood Junction, making the loop;
back we come for a short distance and
then branch oil' on the road to Sher
wood. It bring- a thrill of pleasure,
for this i- a part of the road 1 ha' e
never been over, and my expectations
and anticipations are nboiit to be real
ized. Then again it is pleasant to
know that it is fast reaching out t the
terminal of this branch of the Califor
nia North w estcrn Kail way to Kurckn,
which will open up this vast area of
maguilieeiit and valuable timber laud.
Around the curves we go, stopping;
only occasionally at some new station;
we are climbing the crest of the moun
tains now, and away beyond, as far as
the eye can reach isa shimmering, wave
of green, rus-ct and gold. Then rushes
a silvery brook gleaming like a silver
libbon, and even iu this far and out-of-the-way
place the campers' tents are
pitched, and the train which the occu
pants would not deign to bestow a sec
ond glance at iu busy San Francisco or
their home town, brings the whole
band of campers out of their touts a i.
goes dashing past.
Fourteen miles from Willits is Fn
Cima, tit tin elevation of 2o(H) feet. 1 lere
you command a good view of the Pa
cific ocean twenty miles away, and
vessels can be distinctly seen on ti clear
tiny. It is at this point that you get
one of the grandest and most sublime
views of timber land. J hinge upon
range rises up before you in panoramic
view which is so densely covered with
redwood ami fir that it would seem im
possible for ti jack-rabbit, much less
the tleot-footed deer, to penetrate, it
is stated that tit FJ Cima you can see
more virgin redwood than in any part
of the world. The beauty of the scene
was simply overwhelming for the mo
ment, then everybody in the car gave
expression to their delight at the gran
deur before them. CSrndually we came
down the grade into Sherwood valley,
the terminal of the California North
western I tail way at present. Merc a
stage meets the train to take passengers
still farther north. Near the station is
the Sherwood Motel, formerly known
as the "Cornucopio" farm, which is
kept by Mr. Kirk.
A short stay here, which is 1.":I niilis
from San Francisco, and we are again
wending our way home, and as we are
again tit Kl Cima I must not forget to
tell you that this magnificent expanse
of redwood timber slopes gently back
for forty miles from the Curly Cow
creek or Nova river. Polly was given
both names by dill'ercnt parties. One
more look into the heart of this great
wonder of the w irld and we arc again
on our way to Willits, passing Wood
pecker Crossing. Camp Karnwell, which
is the abiding place of a large number
of section hands, and all'of them are
S reeks. It is really a (.reek colony,
and they are happy among themselves
and not bothering about outside matter-.
Dutch Henry's, which might be
called Tentvflc, for it is a little villa of
snowy tents, Fowler's Flat aud various
stations along this branch of the road
glow with picturesque ell'ect as far as
the eye can reach. One young lady,
with tin eye to business, remarked,
"What a lot of toothpicks that tree
would mi ke." The giant of the forest
she had reference towns fifty-four feet
live "niche.- iu circumference and two
hundred and fifty feet high. 1 wish
every person in California, tired aud
weary of theturiuoil ami trials of every
day life ami w ith a love for the beauti
ful iu nature, could take this trip over
the California Northwestern Kailway,
for they would surely feel that they
had gained ti new lease on life ami that
it was well worth the living.
BRIEF REVIEW.
War Canoe Found After a Century.
The Kishop Museum at Honolulu litis
jll-t been notified of what is considered
a very important find in Polynesian
archaeology, which lit'..-just been made
in Fiji. Thi- i- the discovery, in a
go id -tate of preservation, of what is
known as King Cakobau's enormous
war canoe. This canoe belonged to the
kings of Fiji ami was one of the em
blems of ;!,e crown. Nearly ti century
ago it disappeared, except for the main
mast ami other portions of the gear.
The mainmast wu- given to Profes-or
Agassi some years tigo and is now in
the Philadelphia Museum. The canoe
it.-elf wtL- taken to pieces sit the time it
disappeared and the portions sunk in
tin sirtilioisil lagoon excavated for the
purpo-e. Then the matter wsi-forgotten.
Lately the hilling place, which i
not far from P.siu, litis been found, and
the local Fiji chief, Kadavu Levu, litis
had it taken out ami put together, sind
propo-es to oiler it to the P.ritish Mu
seum. Four Squirrels Mothered By a Cut.
While rambling over the country
Henry Miller, of Hanover, Pa., found
a squirrel's nest that had fsillcn from si
tree and w hich still contained four very
young grsiy squirrels. Miller brought
the squirrels home ami sis an experi
ment placed them in the nest of ti csit
w hose kittens hsid been drowned. The
csit look kindly to the squirrels and is
giving them complete attention, with
therc-ult thsit the children of the for
est sire thriving splendidly under the
care of their foster mother.
A Tree With Emotions.
A species of the acsicia tree hsis been
discovered iu the Far F.sist, which sit
sunset clo-es its leaves iu coils and rolls
its twigs up like si watch-spring. At si
touch the trie will tremble aud llutter,
and sit persistent molestation it will
shsiko it.-elf violently and emit si nsiu.-o-atingodor
which, if inhaled, will cause
si dizzy headache. It litis been named
the "angry tree."
Strange Renuest ol Murderer.
Albert, silisis "Dutch" Fisher, under
sentence of electrocution for murder
committed in Toledo, Ohio, hsi- made
si formal request thsit the dsite of his
execution be changed from July 7 to
July 17, on which dale three others sire
to be electrocuted. Fisher refused to
permit his attorneys to take any steps
to save his life, saying that he com
mitted the murder stud should be pun
ished. Violins Made Aged by Use of X-Rays
It hsis been discovered that Ihe age
ing of st violin can be artificially sir
cured by exposing the wood to X-rays.
The beautiful tone which hsis hereto
fore resulted from a natural si;:eing o"
the wood for ")() or ; year- can thus be
obtained in si single day. If this be
true Stradiverius violins will no longer
be sit si premium, except in so fsir sis per
fection of manufacture is concerned.
The Isirgi-st Christian Fiidosivor uu'
ion in the world is that of Loudon,
with more than 7MM) societies. Phila
delphia is second with V-) societies.
The two smallest ponies in the world
were recently exhibited in Hamburg,
(Jcrnisiny. They are so small a man
onn carry both of them at once.
One boy may equal two ordinary
girls, but not your two.
THE MAI
T.iej 1'iiiimv Much 'I'ron hie utul Worry
fo PoMful Clerk.
ordinarily no man is rich enough
to e.-eape that certain sense of elation
which comes from picking up a nickel
on a sidewalk, but when a railway
postal clerk finds such a coin in a
mail pouch where It has worked out
from Insullicient wrappings not only
es he miss this elation, but it may
provoke profanity.
I'or si nickel lost in a pouch of instil
in transit becomes a matter for na
tional concern. It conies to view per
haps just as a pouch of mall Is emp
tied upon a stilting table, and when
it has broken away from the bunch of
letters ami cards and circulars, roll
ed to an open space on the table and
there settled down, heads or tails, with
v. uoNv sniiuting dance, the clerk who
in si sees it is "it."
A necromancer could have no more
idea than ihe man in the moon as to
what particular package it rolled out
of. and if he had and should tell the
postal clerk the clerk wouldn't dare
try to restore the coin to the original
pao'kago. That would he too easy al
togcther. No. It is a lost nickel from the mo
ment the clerk has to see it spinning
il.ere before his eyes, and according to
the tender governmental conscience the
ch-rk has to get ready for the inati
gur.dioii of about $IS.-i:i worth of fuss
ovi r it.
I'or himself he doesn't dare to go to
bed for a short nap until he has got
rid of his cents' worth of responsi
bility to the government for the ac
tion of the fool person from whom the
.liekel was parted, lie digs up his
primed form for such occasions print
;M and provided and sit once tills out
a long blank, describing the coin, tell
Uig the eirctimsttincos of Its being
found and whether it lauded heads or
tails on the tsihle, naming the pouch
! from which it wsis emptied, the num
ber of the train carrying it. the date
T'nd a few other details.
This report, with the nickel, goes to
the headqusirters of the postal division
in which the car was operated, and
from these bonded ollielals. by the
I :-amo general red tape route, the small
coin finds its way to the seat of na
tional government and to the fund rep
resenting the groat constituency of the
postoilice department, which persists
iu sending money iu envelopes through
the unregistered mails of the service.
i 'hicago Tribune.
PITH AND POINT.
The man who changes jobs frequent
ly never hsis a good one.
When company goes there Is si feel
ing about the house thsit suggests sin
e;i-y old shoe.
It is the opinion of every mother that
:i boy never loses sin opportunity for
i .-if tcmntimr to hrcsik his neck.
I . ..
Meciusc si friend shows a desire to
'.. sympathetic don 1 pull the fsuuily
! skeleton out of the closet to entertain
! !i'm.
As si man gets older he finds that
m ire of his friends sire visiting the
einetcry when they go riding than
formerly.
The people who sire used to good
things when sit home arc very patient
wiih the poor sit'commodatioiis met
awsiy from home.
It often happens thsit a girl who is
not disciplined enough by her parents
gets the kind of si husband who disci
plines her too much. Atchison Olobe.
There Was One Who Did Not I.imuli.
Mstrk Twain once expressed the fol
lowing sentiments to si young woman
who had not .-miled sit si thing thsit he
hsid saiil during an Impromptu recep
tion in his honor at I'.ryn Mawr col
lege, to which his daughter hsid imited
him. All the young ladies but one
were in si stsite of great glee during the
humorist's address: till but one hsid
laughed heartily sit every witty re
in:, rh. Jus: sis Twain finished he
turned to the young wotnsin who hsid
not laughed stud ssiid in sin undertone:
"Vou sire the only sensible one here. I
have not ssiiti a single amusing thing.
If it wen' not for the conspieuoiisuess
of it I would like to press your hand."
- Success.
Direct ICvlilenee."
The lawyer shook his linger warning
ly sit the witness and said: "Now. we
want to hear just whsit you know, not
whsit someone else knows or what you
think or anything of that kind, but
whsit you know. Do you understand':"
"Waal. I know." ssiid the witness,
with emphasis, sis he lifted one limber
leg sind kill! it across the other "1
know that Clay (Jrubbs said that Poll
Thomson told him thsit he heard John
Thomas' wife tell Sid Shuford's gsil
that her husband wsis there when the
tight ink place siml that he said that
they slung each other around In the
bushes right consid'able."
I.oiiu Wiilim hiioil.
Ill 17.":t. in the ninety-sixth yesir of
her sige. died Jean Countess of Itox
burglie. She wsis not si very reuiarksi
ble woman, but her memory is pre
served on sicciiiiul of her long widow
hood, which Isisted seventy-one yesirs.
Her lather, the tlrst Lord Tweeddale.
fought sit. Msirstoti Moor in H". II.
This Countess of Uoxburghe's long
widowhood is iusiguilicsint compared
with thsit of si certain Agnes Skinner.
Accordhgr to sin inscription in Csinibcr
vell chuivh. this worthy woman died
hi l l!!sit the sige of I P. years, having
survived her husband only eight years
less than a cenlurv.
l'oorly ltelienrfetl.
"What is your favorite opersi V" sisked
the young woinsin who was trying to
make converssilion.
Mr. Cunirox looked startled.
"I can't s.iy." he siiiswcrcd. "My fsi
vorite poem Is 'The Wcccssionstl.' sind
my favorite painter is Keuibrainlt, but
1 forget what mother and the girls
told me to say my favorite opersi is."
Washington Star.
A Different Thiioc.
"I didn't suppose that Cupid could
move a stony hearted man like Jones."
"Cupid has nothing to do with it.
Cupidity is what moved him." Detroit
Free Press.
Ambition Is pitiless. Every merit
that It cannot use Is contemptible In
Its eyes.- Joubert.
LOST COINS IN
NW SHORT STORIES
To tn Heeil'M Co.id A I) petite.
Another smeulole of Tom Heed has
Just come to light. The story well II
lustrsites the democratic makeup of
Maine's "big" man. says the T ston
Clohc.
It seems that Mr. Reed was willed
to the little town of Raid win on n mat
ter of b:: s. The man whom he
went to see lived on : farm some dls-
tsuiee from the market. As the fore
noon psisscd with the business still un
tinished it becsime evident that It
would he necessary for the statesman
to remain to dinner.
About 11 :.( the host made this
known to his wife. She hsid planned,
as fsirmer folk often do, for si dinner
of stilt pork, potatoes, salt fish and
fried eggs. Rut this would hardly do
for Mr. Reed.
Intense thought, however, failed to
relieve the situation, sind at hist the
good wife resolved that she would
make the best of It by having an
abundance of eggs, potatoes and tish.
With fear sind trembling she watch
ed "the speaker of the house" as he
sesited himself at the table. There
seemed to be something in the expres
sion of his face that reassured her.
The bored look which she hsid expected
r.ssi:i i r iu axotukk hem,
wsis not there. Instead he glanced
about the tsible sis she hsid often seen
hungry men do.
The host psissed the potatoes, sind
Mr. Reed took two lsirge ones. These
he supplemented with si liberal quanti
ty of tish. sprcsid his potsitoes with
enough pork fat to liostt tlieni and took
two slices of the pork and two eggs.
The hostess was much relieved at
h show of interest, but imsigiue her
ui.iiir.il .on l i i ii the great man passed
up for another help all around and
added three more eggs.
When the meal wsis finished, Mr.
Keed informed the hostess not only
thsit sh- was s; splendid cook, but that
iie had not eaten si mesi! iu yesirs thsit
he had so thoroughly enjoyed. The
enthusiasm iu his times testiiied to the
sioeerliy of his compliments.
Old Time CruilciicNN IlluHt rnted.
Cornelius Nnudcrhilt is a student of
the American of lifty or sixty yesirs
ago. Mr. Vsinderbilfs reseti relies have
brought up many striking instances of
the crudity of the America of the psist.
when every one chewed tobacco and
men wore paper collars instead of linen
ones, it ml now and then he tells a story
of those das.
"In lSo.-t." he said recently, "a Ver
mont shopkeeper came to New York
for the first lime. He wsis sitting one
day in si railrosul station waiting for
si train, and while he wsilted he chew
ed tobacco sind spat on the station wall.
"An otlicistl soon bore down on him.
"'Look a -here, old man,' ssiid the of
Ucisil. 'don't spit on them walls. You
ought to know better than thsit.'
'"What's the ntsitter with you':' said
the Vermonter. 'Don't thsit there sign
say not to spit on the lloor": 1 guess
you can't road, stranger.' " Roston
Post.
l-Zii vly "Speculation."
Rsiron Moiicheur. the Relglsin minis
ter, visited Raltimore. At si dinner he
said:
"The spirit of business enterprise
And speculation is what Impresses me
most profoundly in America. For in
stsineo, I wsis riding one day on the
outskirts of Washington, and at a
certain place I dismounted and got a
little boy to hold my horse. I was
gone sibout ten minutes, sind on my re
turn 1 found the first boy gone smil
another, st smaller one. standing at the
horse's head.
"How Is this':' I said. You tire i::i
the boy I left my horse with.'
'"No. sir,' ssiid the tiny urchin. 'I
speckilated and bought the job off the
other fellow for si dime.'
"Of course after that," the minister
ended, "it was Impossible for me to
hear' the market."
Wanted n Sound Hell.
Apropos of the sending of the famous
Liberty hell from Philadelphia to SL
Louis the late Senator (Juay told of a
meeting of the fsilr commissioners In
which there was considerable discus
sion, during which a inillionsiire mem
ber displayed a great it zesil to have
every exhibit In tlrst class shape than
a knowledge- of history. Ssiid he:
"What is ail this talk I hear sibout
the old boll 7 I think St. Louis is good
enough sind rich enough to have si new
hell, and, anyway, my daughter tells
me that the old bell Is cracked. Cer
tsiiniy we don't wsint anything like
tlyit In the Louisiana Purchase ovyo
sitlon!" New York Times.
15xH-iiNlrc I'ndertnkliiK-.
Rusiness Man Well, my dear. I have
about made up my mind to sell out my
business and go out Into the country
and buy a hundred acres or so and he
si fsirmer for the rest of my life. Rusi
ness Man's Wife -Oh, John, how love
ly! Rut sire urn sure we can afford
It? Sonierville Journal.
Happiness when at a distance ap
pears so great as to touch the sky.
When it enters our door it so dwin
dles that very often we no longer rec
ognize it.
If I ill
THE HAGIOSCOPE.
A It el I c Olden Tlnicn Found In
Jinny KiiKlinh Churches.
'In spile of the close blood relation
ship," ssiid an American who had vis
ited England, "we are frequently re
minded in England that we are for
eigners. It crops up often In the ordi
nary conversation.
"An English friend whose guest I
wsis took me around to see his native
villsige. We entered the church.
"Whereabouts is your pew?' I
asked.
'"We sit over there by the hagio
scope.' he answered, as though a hagio
scope were some common object like a
table or si candlestick. My friend no
ticed the bkinknoss of my face, so he
repeated:
'Over there. Just bolovf the hagio
scope." " 'Would you mind telling me whsit
sort of an instrument It is that you call
a hsigloscope':' I asked meekly.
"The Englishman looked hurt; but.
with a sigh, he explained:
" 'We have them In nearly till the old
country churches. Do you sec that
small glass window through the wall
beside the altar? That was made at
the time when lepers were at large
and they attended church services.
They were of course not allowed In
side, so they stood outside and saw and
heard the services through that hole,
w hich Is called the squint window, hut
more often the hagioscope.' "
DO IT TODAY.
Tomorroiv Mny He Too I.nte nnd Then
You Would lie Sorry.
If you have a Ilower to give, give It
todsiy. One throb of gladness Is worth
more to the living heart than si wealth
of costly blooms laid, however tender
ly, above the dead one.
If you have a kindly visit to make,
msike it today lest another step In sind
lay his quiet hand upon the longing
heart and still forever its fret and pain
and power of glad response. In the
c ty of the dead, in the silence of the
grave, hearts sire never lonely any
more. They have no heed or need.
If you have kisses to bestow, let the
dear living lips their sweetness know
today.
If you've smiles to give, give I hem
today. Living eyes sire often hungry.
Though their gaze be seemingly so
calm, so quiet and inaylisip so proud,
the smiles may be a touch of heaven
for them. If they are closed in death,
tomorrow your fondest smile would
matter naught.
If you have u helpful, hopeful, loving
word to say. say it today. It may keep
some heart from breaking, some soul
from falling. No word or cry can
hrcsik the sesil tomorrow if death
whispers then to ears that hear today.
Exchange.
A L'weful TlKer.
'Snakes sind hyen.ts sire strange pets,
but sirsingest of sill is a full grown ti
ger, and such a pet hsid Major Mansell
Pleydell," says A. Mervyn Smith in his
hook. "It used to be chained up just in
front of the duor of his bungalow. The
major had a method of running up
bills with local tradesmen, but there
wsi great ditliculty in getting pay
ment, as none of the bill collectors was
venturesome enough to cross the
guardian at the door. It was a great
joke of the major's when asked to pay
his bill to reply: 'Have you sent your
bill; Your iiisin has never presented It
at my house.' Rrutus. as the tiger was
named, seemed to know whsit wsis re
quired of him. When chained before
his master's door he would lie with his
head between his foropaws sind watch
the gate. If a stranger entered he
would lift his head and breathe heav
ily, and this wsis enough to scare the
most venturesome of bill collectors."
Mnu'K WumI Knemy.
Wherever you see ten people togeth
er, ten average people of sill siges. you
may ssiy: One of those ten will die of
consumption. In the long run you will
be more than justtllcd In your prophe
cy. It will be nearer one out of every
nine born Into the world. We are hor
ribly afraid of cholera and sill bowel
diseases, of diphtheria sind of scarlet
fever. Add to these the annual deaths
from measles (measles is far from be
ing harmless) and the sum total is not
half of what the great white plague
claims. Only pneumonia approaches
it sis a slayer of men. Everybody's
Msigazlue.
The Monne.it Men.
It Is believed the original meanest
man was the husband who gave his
wife a Christmas present of a pair of
suspenders. An esirly holder of the ti
tle was the gentleman who always oc
cupied the last sesit In the last car in
order to save the Interest on his mon
ey until the conductor got to liliu. One
of the most brilliant of the long line
wsis the man who took candy from a
child in the street. Chicago Inter
Ocean.
Eternity.
Eternity Is Incomprehensible. When
the laziest snail has carted every drop
of water In all our oceans and every
grain of sand In all our lands to the
farthest away star and brought It stil
back again, stopping for a century
rest at each planet on the way both
ways, then will we see the llrst rays
of the sunrise of eternity's endless day
Iu the east of the beginning.
This being the case. It Is suggested
that we don't cram ourselves with this
world's foods and drink so much of
earthly water that It will take half of
the everlasting to get our systems In
shape to enjoy what's left of eternity.
Ilaylleld Mower.
A Xejcro and EngrllMh.
"You are almost uu octogenarian,
still," said the soniieducated doling
yellow negro pompously.
"Wha-what's dat yo' say?" snapped
the venerable but unlettered darky.
"I specified, sah. that you tire almost
an octogenarian."
"Well, don' yo' do It ag'ln. boy. or
I'll done bust yo' head wid my stick.
Yo' heahs my prognostication?" New
York Tribune.
The .Man nnd the Hour.
Mrs. Mason-Lodge (waking suddenly i
Is that you, Henry? What time is it?
Mr. Mason-Lodge (comfortingly i
'Sh, dear! S mush earlier 'n us'ly is at
tliish time, I 'sure you.
CHOICE MISCELLANY
Ilrniiii of Men und Ape.
According to the examination. of the
brains of Europeans thsit have been
made by anatomists, one of the most
Important physical differences between
men sind apes sind monkeys lias been
the absence of the so called simian
fold in the human brain. This simian
fold, or sulcus, which occurs on the
posterior portion of the mstin hemi
spheres, has recently been discovered
by Professor G. Elliot Smith of the
Egyptiau government School of Medi
cine in the course of an examination
of a number of brains of Egyptians
nnd Sudanese. He has found that in
certain examples of brains In ids col
lection the characteristic folds found
in anthropoid apes are so closely repro
duced that he is able to trace and clear
ly establish the Identity of every sul
cus, or fissure. Professor Smith hsis
also succeeded iu finding human brains
where the occipital pattern corresponds
closely with the brain of the gorilla.
As these points of Identity between
man and his nearest relations have not
previously been encountered by Euro
pean scientists in their brain studies,
their importance can be realized, as
they do away with one of the supposed
and hitherto recognized structural dis
tinctions. Harper's Weekly.
Tel cph on I tin.
The man with telephonitls Is one of
the features of New York restaurant
life, and there are man of him. As
soon as his party Is seated and the
supper is ordered he rises, thrusts both
hands in his pockets and strolls up to
the cashier's desk to use the tele
phone. And of course every man and
woman In the restaurant watches him,
and all try their level best to hear what
he says. He shields his Hps with his
hand, which adds to the effect of mys
tery, and for some minutes he holds
the center of the stage, which Is ex
actly what he wants. Then back go
his hands in his pockets, and he re
turns to the table.
The cashier in one popular cafe says
that some of the conversations are pos
itively absurd. He overheard this Im
portant message:
"Hello, Jim! Is that you? Oh, noth
ing. Just dropped into R.'s for supper.
Yes, they're all here. Know anything
new? All right. See you tomorrow.
So long."
If he's a regular customer, the house
pays the toll. And the other patrons
get a chance to study his summer
waistcoat or the fit of his Tuxedo coat.
The Flrnt Voynpre of the Old Slrluft.
According to cable dispatches the en
gines of the Sirius, the first English
ship to cross the Athintie. have been
brought to the shore on" the coast of
Cork, tifter tin immersion in the sea of
over fifty yesirs. Thee engines, now
that they are recovered, ought to huve
an honored place in some Rritish mu
seum, for the voyage of the Sirius
from Queonstown to New York in ISoiJ
has been widely and not inaptly com
pared to the voyage of Columbus In
lilt-'.
The little vessel-it was no larger
than an ordinary modern tugboat- met
strong head winds off the Irish coast,
and the crew finally mutinied at what
they considered ihe mad project
crossing the Atlantic in a steamship.
Lieutenant Roberts of the P.ritish na
vy, however, enforced discipline at
the muzzle of the pistol, and the dan
gerous voyage wsis-completed in eight
een and a hsilf days. ;ln 1S41. by the
way. Lieutenant Roberts left New
York in commsiud of the President,
but from thsit day to this neither he
nor his vessel was ever again heard
of.-Philadelphia Press.
To Tell the Ace of Fihe.
There is a new theory extant that it
Is possible to determine the sige of
fishes, especially those of the cod fami
ly, by counting the periodic growth of
the scales.
We know that the growth of the
scales Is annual in the carp. Why
should It not be so in ssilt water fishes?
Mr. J. S. Thomson, an English biolo
gist of note, has been making some in
teresting experiments in this line to
test the age of fishes.
The scales sire first carefully exam
ined, then the fishes are labeled and
returned to the sea for future observa
tion. In some cases a study of the scales
reveals changes, so that the rings in
the scales can be distinctly traced
from year to year with a certain fixed
regularity. Roston tRobe.
A Very Hard Luck Story.
Here is a remsirksible story of con
tinued hard luck In the case of R. I).
Dukes, a farmer. Within a short space
of time a lot of things happened to
him. He lost his crops, cholera killed
most of his hogs, a shed fell aud killed
his two cows, his wife was thrown
from a buggy and hurt so badly that
she went on crutches for mouths, ami
she was Just beginning to walk again
when she wsis burned to death by sin
exploding lamp. Mr. Dukes was also
seriously burned In the fire. Then he
Injured his knee and had to go on
crutches. Then he was badly burned
again In a prairie fire. A few woiks
later hla mother died, and then wis
house burned up. with all its contents.
Reloit (Kan.) Gazette.
Verdict of "Guilty, but Innocently."
In the superior court a case in which
more or less Interest was manifest
was the case of State versus Isaac
Matthews, for trespass. A rather unu
sual verdict was rendered by the jury
when they first entered to give their
verdict, which was "Guilty, but inno
cently." His honor recharged the jury
nnd sent them hack with Instructions
to render a verdict of "Guilt v" or "Not
guilty." Tho final verdict wsis "Guil
ty." Raleigh News and Observer.
The Encore.
"That's It!" exclaimed Mrs. Rsiscom
at the concert as the singers came Hit
again in response to an encore. "Make
'em do it over again until they get the
thing right."
The hardest work some men do is
looking for a chance to put the blame
on the other fellow. Atchison Globe.
He only employs prejudice who can
make no use of reason. Cicero.