standing slimy to attention along wim
his troop, answering the call of bis
name at tattoo, with the suow gather
ing thickly als>ut them, that Fin Strait
was comfortably seated In the neat lit
tle unprotected bouse, protecting from
ail comers the neat little widow.
“But I must be going.” be said for
the tenth time. “It's getting late, and
the snow gets deeper every minute. If
I want to get home at all tonight, I
should lie going non'. Mrs. Bell."
“Yes, Mr. Htrait.”
“I was thinking you must be very
lonely here aluce—you know”—
Tlie widow's eyes ceased to twinkle
and winked away a tear or two.
“It la lonely, Mr. Htrait," she answer
ed him.
Fin shuttled his feet nervously ami
looked out beneath the ueui red win
dow shades.
“It's still snowing." said he, “Mrs.
Bell.”
"Yes, Mr. Strait."
“It's not lonely up at the post," said
Fin. rubbing the crossed brass sailers
on his hat with sudden fury.
The widow sighed.
“But 1 can't live at the post. Mr.
8tralt.” she answered and stood in the
middle of the floor, thoughtfully play
ing with her marriage ring. The far
rier looked at her timidly, tenderly.
“Sit down. Mrs. Bell!” he cried des
perately. “If you can't find a chair, sit
down here.”
And he pulled the widow on his knee.
“Oh. Mr. Htrait!” said Mrs. Bell, but
resisted very gently.
"Will you come and live a* the post
as my wife?” the farrier whispered,
but the wicked widow, conscious of an
offer from the cor|toral now iu her
pocket, played with the farrier.
"Ob, Mr. Htrait.” site said, “you sol
diers at the (lost all say the same thing,
and none of you mean it, not one!"
At that there came a modest rap at
the door, and the widow jumped to
open it. It is probable that she knew
who It was. for the twinkle of her eyes
betrayed a love of mischief, but she
evinced great surprise at seeing Cor
poral Healy standing in the snow. She
threw the door wide and hospitably
open.
“Why, Mr. Healy." said she, "to
think you'd come through all that
snow—for the second time today too!
You must like the town. Come right
in!”
“If it bad snowed taynlts an' sa
bers, me darllnt.” cried Healy, enter
ing, “I’d have come fur the” —
He did not finish the sentence. He
saw his old friend. Fin. and the cor
quent Indian risings, and together they
ORFORAL HEALY walked
round the win- fence at the vaguely sup|to«ed, though only iu their
cups did they talk of it. they would lie
corner where the little school
______ house stissl with the elul>oriite pensioned off and look after the wel
fare of the old troop from a distance.
uff of one who 1» «trolling about for
“How. Healy!”
want of Homething better to <lo. Yet he
“How. Fin!”
turned his bead now and again and
Healy twirled his stick like a drum
eyed the long verandas of the burrncks
major and chirruped "Garry Owen."
and the men kicking about a football
If be bad looked straight at old Fin. be
on the frozen parade ground In a way
might have liven struck with the fact
which was almost guilty. They were
that the farrier’s air was as guilty as
not thinking of him at all, but the sol
his own. Strait, usually ready with a
di« r twirled bis stick and whistled
rude Jocosity of greeting, now stood
with unuHtial loudness. an apparent at
still and gazed with great thoughtful
tempt to convince observers that he ness across the slope of the snowy
was merely enjoying the fresh, cold
plains, beyond the thread of cotton-
wind that whistled over the brown
wooda which fringed the creek, to the
plains and reddened his thin and leath
scattered houses of the little town be
ery cheeks. One eye, however, he kept
yond. The evening sunlight falllug
sharply on the schoolhouse door, aud
upon the low roofs, Islands In a sea of
twice in five minutes he looked secret
snow, softened the sordldness of the
ly nt ids watch. The door <>|>ened. and
rude, wooden shacks, touched them
the children of tlie post came charging
with the artist's wand and made them,
out, a tumbling group of boys aud
from a group of unseemly Intruders, al
girls, little folks of the plains, soldiers
most an acceptable part In the lonely
ba lies, clear eyed and self reliant. Hea
grandeur of the wilderness. Healy's
ly walked more quickly round the cos-
eyes unconsciously sought the same
ner and presented himself nt the side
scene. His whistle died away, and his
door of tlie school, out of sight of bar
whirling stick dropped to the ground.
racks and parade ground. Graves, the
The two hardened old campaigners
soldier schoolmaster, was clearing Ills
were usually as remote from sentiment
desk and preparing to follow the
: as gun barrels, yet now they slmul-
youngsters.
I taneously sighed—the abrupt, gruff
“Hello!” lie cried, looking up at the i gasp of storm weathered veteranliood,
tall, straight, redheaded figure in the ! yet, unmistakably as the soft breath
doorway. “Coming to school, corporal? of a girl, the sigh of happiness and
What reader shall I put you in?”
content and love.
Healy grinned benignantly.
At that unexpected and startling
“Fur many's the year. Graves." be eruption from the breast of either each
said, “the school of the battalion has turned as one caught in a deed of dark
been the only wan I've found nicis- ness and faced the other, reddeulng.
siiry. an' tactics bus bln me r'ader. | “I’ll not be kapin’ yez. Fin, If It’s
Sliure I wuz passin' an' looked in upon afther walkin' yez are," Baid the cor
yes.
It's a wearin' job yez have, poral, almost angrily, and took a step
Graves, Cachin’ them kids, near as bad forward.
ns drillin' rookies. I'm nfther* think
“Only to the sutler’s for a beer,” said
in’.”
Fin, more conciliatory. “Will you have
“Alioiit!” said Graves, taking up the one?”
floor key,
“I am off the booze.” said Healy
“Ye’ve a great head. Graves," the shortly and disappeared round the cor
corporal said sweetly, with a flattering ral. “Whut the dlvil wuz he hangtn*
cock of Ills blue eye. “I’ve bln bearin' armin’ for so mysterious?” he added,
the major towld the chaplain to lave with most unfriendly irritation.
yez lie, us yez knew more than be did.”
“Where’s the old son of a gun off to
Graves laughed and silt down.
all alone anyway, and what the dickens
“When you flatter me like that, Hea was he sighing about, like a blessed
ly." he said, “I know you’re after | cook stuck on a dog roblier?" the far
something. Wbat Is It?”
rier soliloquized frownlngly as be
“Not at all. at all!” cried Healy, sud strode to the isist trader's for his liver.
denly becoming nervous. "I wuz Jlst And over his glass he |>ondered long
passin'.
But. seeln’ yez ain’t busy, until, as he drank a second one. his
wild yez do nte a fuvor. Mr. Graves?”
frown was heavy and black.
“Mister!” cried Graves, laughing
“By.jiggers!” he cried suddenly to
again.
the startled bartender. “I’ll take no
“I'll be lieggln’ yez. though, to kape chances anyway. I'll do It tonight or
It to yerself.” said Healy earnestly bust! Give me a beer, John, my boy.
and plunging headlong into the matter and good luck to both of us!”
on his mind. “It's no mntther nv
Once Healy was safely away, his
shame, but the boys will I h > betther long legs quickened their action until
not to hear It, seeln’ as 1 might have lie almost ran down the sloping, slip-
to take their foolin' sarious. Wud yez pery trail to the creek, across the un
give me yer opinion on that. Graves?” railed, dangerous bridge over the
Graves took a big sheet of fisilseap creek and. with almost the hopeful “Tomorrow I'll teek an umtuvr to my
question."
from the corporal and read aloud:
spring of youth, across the plain to
“Sweet girl, accept n lowly heart.
the outskirts of the mushroom town. poral's face turned rod and white and
Which now thy lover (with the major's It neared shnset when he reached the darkly purple In quick succession. The
permission) lays at thy feet,
For from thee. oh. darling. I cannot dwell first outlying houses and branched off furrier had risen to his feet at the
apart:
across lots to one little two storied sound of the soldier's voice, and tlie
Be mine I respectfully (and. according cottage which stood quite by itself, two faced eaih other in the cozy little
to the rides and regulations of the
very small, very neat and very unpro parlor with, for the first time since
service) do entreat.”
tected. Healy paused fifty yards from they were both recruits, fierce anger
“It's poethry, ye’ll be aftber notic
it. drew a long breath, blew ft out in their eyes. The widow closed tlie
in',” said Healy, beaming with such
again with explosive determination door and began to laugh and chatter.
pride that he failed to observe the
nnd charged the little front door as If
“How funny.now!”she cried. "Here's
schoolmaster's red face and burst of It were an Indian outpost, yet when
you two, whom the folks at the post
chuckling coughs. “But I wanted yez.
he reached it his knock was most mod call the brethren, you're so thick and
seein’s ye're well known fur a scholar,
est, and the martial red of his face such old friends, and you’ve never met
to tueli It up a bit. Graves. Ye'll ob
feebled to a flickering pink. A little at my house before. How funny!”
snrve it don't sing Itself, fur It's me
woman, as neat and unprotected look
Ho she chattered, while her lips were
furst attlmpt since a boy. Tlirue po
ing as her house, opened the door. yet red with honest Fin's kiss and
ethry shod kin' av go to a chune whin
Perhaps ft were more explanatory of Healy’s appeal crumpled in her pocket.
yez rude It. I belave."
her appearance to say that she looked Old hearts are more slow to flame to
“Well.” said Graves, “my boys usu
as If Inviting protection, such a slip of either love or anger than those that
ally read the very best poetry sing
a woman, yet not devoid of plumpness are young, but once afire they burn
song! corporal. Is this a—a declara
In the cheek, such a blushing woman, with the snap and glare of fury. Healy
tion?”
yet not without a twinkle in her eye.
heard nothing of Mrs. Bell's chatter.
Healy blushed; nt least his neck
“Oh, Mr. Healy!" said she. “I hardly His ears were full of a savage hum
grew even redder than was customary.
expected—I am glad to see you! Won't ming. like the buzz of a Kaffir impl.
But he drew himself up very straight
you come tn? What has brought you The farrier did not look at her. His
Indeed and answered boldly:
into the town again today?”
eyes were fixed on the corporal's. In
“In confidence. It's nfther bein' that
“Ab. Mrs. Bell. Mrs. Bell.” said Hea the breasts of both there blazed the
same. Graves. Is It all right?"
ly gallantly, “what wud be afther same primitive pussion of jealousy
“Why spoil the sentiment by these
brlngin’ me but jlst a solght av thlm which maddens at times the stags of
bracketed assurances of the major giv
the mountains, the tigers of the Jun
swate oyes?”
ing his permission?”
“Mr. Healy, I'm surprised.” said the gle. For the sake of a woman's lip
“Aw, Graves,” said the corporal,
little widow, with a quicker twinkle of the comradeship of a score of years
winking shrewdly, "whin I wuz youn
those dangerous eyes. “But I don’t was forgotten.
ger nn' runnin' nfther the gtirrls 'twas
Delieve you. »on people at the post
meallf wuz nil sintlment, so It wuz.
The corporal found his voice first.
all say the same thing, and none of
But Igspnrlnnce has Inrned me that It's
"Axcuse me. Mrs. Bell,” he said, with
you moan what you say, not one."
the purnctlcnl num gits there. I'm
a hoarse voice, “fur dishturbln’ yez.
“Who —who —who's been darin* to
nfther dilleately inshinuatln' to the
It's business I'm afther havin’ will
say that same thing?” cried Healy in
Farrier Strait. Will yez come out?”
Indy thnt she'd need nlver fear the
angry surprise.
He shot the l»st words angrily at
mayor’ll objlct. Sliure she knows a
Mrs. Bell laughed gleefully.
his old friend, and as quickly as the
sojer requolrea to ask lave to marry
“Come In. corporal,” she said. "Do
defiance reached bls ear Fin took a
av the commandin'officer. Bn* It spiles
you think I’ll tell you who said any
step forward. Healy turned to the
the chune av the poethry. an’ that's
thing to me at all and have you eating
widow and Isiwed with stiff, soldierly
whut I’m askin'. Wull yez Jlst drill it
the poor things up? Do come In!”
Into shape. Graves, seeln' ye’re n schol
formality.
“
Begab.
an
’
I
can't
Jlst
ylt,
Mrs.
ar, which, I belave. Includes poethry.”
“I'll be likely In town tomorrow,"
Bell.
”
Healy
answered.
"They
’ll
he
The schoolmaster good nnturediy as- !
said he, “on the matther av the busl-
afther
callin'
me
name
at
retrate.
Mrs.
sonii-d the task and. much to the cor- J
Bess betwixt us.”
poral's admiration, succeeded shortly 1 Bell, swate Mrs. Bell, I’m askin' yea
At once the farrier faced the widow.
In submitting to the old soldier a suf- j to look at this wee bit av wrltlu’.”
“Mrs. Bell,” said he. “tomorrow I'll
"Oh,” cried rhe widow, suddenly ani seek an answer to my question.”
Cclently creditable effusion, when Hea
ly gratefully took his departure, leav- i mated, "do tell! Is it an invite to a
But the widow made no answer.
ing Graves to chuckle by himself for a hop at the post? Are the soldiers go She was now pale and trembling.
ing to give another dance?”
long time tn the desorb'd schoolhouse.
“Corporal,” she stammered. “Mr.
“Not yit!” exclaimed Healy, throw Htrait!”
As the soldier left and took his way
round the rear of the buildings, avoid ing oui a restraining baud as Mrs.
They were swiftly gone, however,
ing the neighborhood of the ¡tost trad Bell liegan to tear the envelope. “Not the farrier closing the door tiehind hint,
er's and the guardhouse, his manner | yit." be repeatedly tenderly. “Wblu and the widow sat down, no little
was more suspicious than ever. The j I'm gone. Mrs. Bell. It's—It's—a niat- frightened at such sudden mutual
twirl of Ids stick anil the blit lioness of tber av business, me dear."
wrath. The smartest and most amor
"Business, corporal?"
bls whistle were affectedly nonchalant.
ous of youthful lovers she could have
“I'll lie afther an answer tonight. managed, playln- ne against the oth
He could not. though. If such were his
ptirisise, avoid all notice nor help meet Lit it be the might wan. swate Mrs. er, but the white uent of these veter
lug some one. He was almost beyond | Bell.”
ans was beyond her power to cool.
the post limits and had settled to a : "Ob. Mr. Healy!” the widow mur She warmed her pretty white hands
businesslike walk when, just as be mured and blushed. Healy caught her at the stove and shivered nnd laughed
turned the •■orncr of the corral, he ran in his arris and gave her a hearty kiss. a little and cried a little in turn.
"The two silly old things," she mur
fairly into Fin Strait, the farrier of his j “Oh! on! Mr. Healy!” she cried and
mured. “To go and fight when one's
own troop. Like the corporal, Fin was ' blushed again.
“I-t V. be the might wan. swate Mrs. just as nice as the other.”
a veteran, and the two were chums of
(TO RK CONTINt'KD.)
long standing. The farrier's room In Bell." the corporal repeater! and ran
the stables luid been the scene of i away, himself a shamefaced red and
Judge Bland of the St Louis court of
many a quiet carouse. with none to fearful to look round to see If any one
appeals has decided that workmen
join in but the cronies them selves, and bad noticed them
The farrier, being a privileged char must be paid In cash. He assessed a
when Healy's pockets were empty and
bls throat hot coppered of a morning acter. was excused from tattoo mil tine of »100 against an employer for
he was always sure of a punch corn- call. Therefore there was nothing to paying an employee In checks payable
(founded from Fin's stock of alcohol, hinder him. an hour after retreat, from tn goods at a store Instead of lawful I
supplied to the farrier as a horse medi locking his room door in the troop sta money. The judge declared that a la
cine. Together they had come out of bles and speeding away through a borer could not If be so desired waive
pleasure bent. So the benefits of the statute or contract
the war, together Joined the regular slight fall of snow
army, together hnd campaigned In fre It happened while Corporal Healv was them awav
HUMOR OF THE HOUR
- ------ 7
Far the Pr«olr«a4er.
ZOLA’S EARLY TRIALS.
INCENTIVE TO EFFORT,
When the Boddlna Authee
Was riansed In Misery.
The Lr«««« L)«rol«*« Life Teach«« to
th« idl« Bara.
Young Zola had kicked bls heels for
several years In ministerial anterooms,
but all to no effect. Gambetta. to pre
vent Zola perishing of want, gave him
the subprefeeture of Castle Karra sin.
But for want of money he had to stop
on the way. and for so long a time
that M. de Freycinet slipped into the
place. Zola during the period dealt
with In “La Debacle” was In the south
of France. How be then lived I can
not Imagine. After tilings settled down
In Paris In 1871 lie usd fallen into the
blackest misery, and with a la-autiful
young wife. Iler mother was no lon
ger a tile to share her domicile and
I hmi - i I. such as they were, with them.
Zola sometime« liad to take the wool
out of the mat tress of his tied aud sell
It. He esea|ssl from death by famine
owing to a letter of introduction from
a doctor who attended his mother to
A Baa B.-eak.
“Mary,” he said as he picked up his Hschette, the great publisher. The
knife and fork, "this steak. Mary—this latter employed him at a salary of All
francs a mouth to tie up books in (tar
steak is simply”—
•
“Now, 1 know you're going to say it's eel* and address them. Hut he rather
tough and It’s cold and it isn’t fit to llk“d Zola and, divining in him drat
eat and- -liooboo-you mean old thing”— rate stuff, engaged him to write for the
“No, Mary; I was going to say that It (taia-rs those puffs known as reclames
was the tenderest and moat deliciously for books the firm had brought out.
cooked I have ever tasted, but since Noticing Ida punctuality and his re
you have drawn my attention to the serve T'lth other young men. Hachette
promoted Zola still higher by making
matter 1 find that”—
him his private secretary. He was
But she had fled.—Baltimore News
then an uncouth, shy, HI dressed, man
nerless. squat little fellow, but he evi
His IaSlsaatlea.
“Aren't you sometime:, it little con dently bad a tidy wife, who paid great
science stricken when you think of the attention to the furbishing up of bls
clothes and to hla shirts. — London
advantages you take of the public?”
“Not at all,” answered Senator Sor Truth.
ghum. “Look at the men of genius the
Raia la Crossed Leas.
public baa permitted to starve. Ixiok
“Uncross your legs," said a doctor.
at the heroes whose sacrifices are not
“Oh. no!" said his son. “What’s the
acknowledged even by a tablet of
stone. Any little thing I can do toward use of being so polite all the time?”
"My boy," the father answered, "It Is
getting even with the public gives me
sincere moral satisfaction.”—Washing not on account of a mere rule of eti
quette thnt I tell you to uncross your
ton Star.
legs, but it is because leg crossing la
Merer Satisfied.
an Injurious thing, a thing as baleful to
“I declare, those trolley conductors the health as kissing or as microbes.
"When you cross your legs, you fit
can’t tell the truth.”
"What’s wrong now?”
the knee cap of the upper limb into the
“Why, the one on the car tonight put cavity under the knee of the lower one.
me off three blocks from our corner.”
In tlie cavity that you thus compress
“What did he say to you?”
there are the two ini(iortant exterior
“Why, he said, 'This is where you and interior popliteal nerves and a
get off. madam.’ ”
number of glands and biota! vessels.
“Well, it was, wasn't it?”—Yonkers Compression does not act well on these
Statesman.
organs. It lienumbs them and weak
ens and emaciates them. You feel the
A Compromise.
Injury In a numbness of the whole leg.
The leg goes to sleep.
"Keep on with the habit, and your
legs weaken. They become thin; they
lose their shapeliness. It is only such
men and women and children as never
cross their legs who have strong and
supple ami lieautlful limbs.”—Philadel
phia Record.
It is human nature to take it easy
when we ran, aud with moat people a
big bauk account will paralyze effort
and destroy aiubitlou. Who can toil
wbat would have lieeu the effect on
our uatioual history bad Abraham Lin
coin been born Iu luxury, surrounded
with great libraries, free to the multi
form advantages of schools, colleges
Ind universities, the manifold oppor-
t uni ties for culture that wealth be
stows? Who shall say whether the ale
ien<-e of all incentive to effort might
not have smothered such a ge'nlus?
Wliat wealthy, city bred youth of to
day, glutted with opportunities for ac
quiring knowledge, can feel that hun
ger for hooka, that thirst for knowledge
that spurred Lincoln to scour the wil
derness for many miles to borrow the
coveted "Life of Washington” which
be had lieu rd that some one iu the
neighborhood owned?
What young lawyer of our day goes
to a law sclxMil or library with such a
keen apiietite. with such a yearning for
legal knowledge, a« this youth bad
wlieii ||(. actually walked forty-four
miles to iMirrow Blackstone's “Commen
taries?"
Where is tlie student iu college or
university today who experiences that
satisfaction, that sense of conquest,
which thrilled Lincoln while lying on
the floor of his log cabin working out
arithmetical problems on a wooden
shovel by tlie light of a wimm I tire or
cuthiiMlaatically devouring the coutunta
of a itorrowed liook. as if bia eyes
would never rest on its pages again?
Ou reading Lincoln's Gettysburg
K(M*ecli and his second inaugural ad
dress
foreign
readers
exclaimed,
“Whence got this man bls style, seeing
he knows nothing of literature?" Well
might they exclaim, but «their aston
islinient would have been still greater
had they known that those eloquent
utterances tluit thrilled the nation's
heart liad fallen from the lips of one
who In his youth bad access to blit
four books—the Bible, “Pilgrim's Prog
ress." Weems’ "Life of Washington"
and Burns' poems. Success.
Trouble
“If you ililuk that I am going to pay
you a penny for thia advertlaemeut of
mine In your measly old paper, you
are mightily mlstakeu my friend.” said
an Irate bu»iiM'*s man as he slaiumed
down a copy of th« Mornlug Reveille
ou the couider in the business office of
the paper.
“What is the matter with the ad
vertisement?” asked the business man
ager of the (taper as be came furward.
"I'd ask what 1» the matter if I were
you! What I wrote was ‘A fresh in
voice of dairy butter every day.’ Will
you just cast your eye on that ad. of
mine aud
what you have printed?"
The business manager “cast his eye"
ou the ad. indicated and looked for a
place of safety when be read:
"A fresh Invoice of hairy butter ev
ery day!”—Lippincott's Magazine.
Times
His Portrait.
One of the members of a certain sub
urban photographic society recently de
livered a lecture, illustrated by lantern
views.
Another member, thinking to have a
Joke at the expense of the lecturer,
slipped in among tlie slides a lantern
liortrait of himself.
The joke would come in, of course. Iiy
Clerk—You’ve called me an Idiot, and
If you don't take It back you may look the portrait ap(iearlug oil the screen
immediately after the lecturer had an
for another clerk.
Employer—Very well. I'll take the id nounced the appearing of something
quite different.
iot back. So you'll stay.
Fate and chance were unluckily
against the humorist, for when his por
Oat.
Hicks— That's what I call real “out trait was presented the lecturer, with
out kuowing wbat was on the sc^rn,
and out” hard luck.
gravely read from bls list:
Wicks—What's that?
"The next slide, ladles and gentle
Hicks—When 1 was away from the
office today, Burroughs called to pay men, la the picture of a refractory don
_____________
me $5 be owed me. Being out, I was key!”
out the fl ver. If I’d had good luck. I’d
Minnesota*« Miekaamea.
have been In and in.—Philadelphia
Minnesota has been designated as the
Press.
“North Star State,” of which expres
sion two or three explanations have
Dlaconra*ed.
“I’m sure,” said the clumsy man as been given one ou account of its geo
be slipped off his horse again, “that I’ll graphical position, another that the
north star ap(>ears in its cost of arms.
never learn to ride.”
“Oh,” replied the riding master, “Just It has also been called the "Lake
State.” from the number of small lakes
keep on trying!”
“But I'm having my own troubles within its limita, and the "Gopher
trying to keep on.”—Catholic Standard State.” because the early settlers
found these animals In such abundance
and Times.
that they proved a serious nuisance.
I.osteal Vlsw.
Even a careful rider passing over a
She—Miss Fortyodd is certainly a plain where gophers abounded was in
queer woman. Why, she actually re ■lunger of being thrown by his horse
grets that she wasn't born a man.
aix-identally stepping Into a gopher
He—Well, one can hardly blame her hole.
for that Such an occurrence would
Hl« Exact Age,
have greatly Increased her matrimonial
Asked his age In a court of justice, a
chances.—Chicago News.
Georgia darky replied:
“Well, siili, I ez ole ez de big white
To« Cr««l.
“Yes. Miss Searenyellough's poodle oak tree on Nlarse Tom's plantation.”
“And how old may that lie?” Inquired
died yesterday. It was awfully pa
a lawyer.
thetic. She kissed ft goodby.”
"Well, sub. ef I makes no mistakes,
“Kissed it, eh? Well—er—was that
before or after the doctors bad aban de white oak tree is de same age ez de
mill dam, en de mil) dam ain't a day
doned hope?”—Baltimore News.
older dan de red barn, what come nigh
ter bein' burned up w'en de stars felled!”
Why»
"Mamma.” said little Willie gravely —Atlanta Constitution.
after a visit to Mrs. Cosmetic, whose
Speedlag the Parti««.
nose looked as if it had just come out
Mamma—I was surprised and shocked
of the flour barrel, “why doesn’t that
lady use smokeless powder?” — New by the coldness with which you greet
Yorker.
ed Miss Boerstim when she called.
Ethel—Yes, mamma, but I made up
Oat of Stab«.
for it later.
The Parson—Has your young friend
Mamma—Did yon?
high Ideals?
Ethel-Yes, Indeed. You should have
Miss Marmaduke—Has be? Why, be seen how cordially I trade her “good-
expects to tie an airship man some day. by.”—Philadelphia Press.
•-Yonkers Herald.
Then aafi Mow.
Tl>« aox.enl. dear «riurs—
A wonderful throng!
And they died In a garret.
To live In a song!
They told us the story
At which the world thrills.
Locked In a rude corner
From bailiff« with bills.
The modern, mad writers
Who thunder away—
They live In n palace
And die In a day!
They tell us no story
Humanity feel a
And ride to oblivion
On automobiles!
—Atlanta Constitution.
Caleslatlng.
Elderly A<lorer-I am sixty nine and
have »300.000.
Fair Young Thing—I'll give you an
answer the day after tomorrow. I will
have to figure It all out in the mortuary
tables.
_________ _______
Patient (after giving the doctor »3
and receiving a prescription!- But sup
pose. doctor, this doesn't cure me?
Doctor- Ill that esse come back, and
I'll relieve you again. — Detroit Free
Press.
LAY UP YOUR TREASURES.
Mo Ma« Shoold Spenfi the Whole of
Hi« Income.
Is any one t<si (sior to save? Is an im
portant problem which tlie readers of
a London dally are at present attempt
ing to solve. The question Is not by
any means a new one. It is one which
has troubled past generations. Just as.
In all probability, It will affect the gen
erations yet to come. We cannot say
that this latest discussion of the sub
ject Is throwing much. If any. fresh
light ii|Min It.
In the first place, there Is a diversity
of opinion regarding the term "poor.”
One mail, who derives an income of
»t.:i50 a year from private property,
fancies he comes under the category,
while another does not consider any
one poia' who has an income of ».KM) a
year, says a writer In Leslie's Weekly.
It is manifestly Impossible to flx any
limit In a matter like this. Very much
de|M*nds u(ion the locality and the con
ditions aud surroundings of the Indi
vidual.
An Income that would be
amply sufficient to Insure a family a
comfortable home, excellent social ad
vantages and a good living In a coun
try village would mean many priva
tions and sore discomforts in any large
city.
On the whole, however, we are hi-
clined to lielleve that Max O'ReU’a
views on tlie (stint under discussion
come nearer the safe and common
sense rule than anything we have seen.
“I do not care.” lie says, “how small
the Income of a man is, be should never
spend the whole of it, especially if he
lias a wife and children. He should
at least save enough to (ray every year
the premium on a good life policy. No
man Is worthy of the name w*ho does
not do this, at least, at the price of
whatever [WlvaUons be has to submit
to. Some pleasure may tie derived
from high living, hut certainly no hap
piness.”
Wbfff
One of the wonderful things is that
a woman of fair Intelligence will paint
her cheeks like a clown's and appear
on the streets. Why does she do it?
Does she Imagine that people think the
paint is bloom of youth? Does she not
know that people laugh at her? There
are two things that people are quick
to notice- w lien a man wears a wig
and when a woman paints her cheeks.
—Atchison Globe.
The Ocaliat.
Patient I can’t see that there’s a
thing wrong with tny eyesight.
Oculist Jonnlwyse - The most posl
five proof that you need glasses, my
dear sir, when you are unable to see
anything so (ilaln us that!—Ixra Angeles
Herald.
Mol All Heformed.
“So de.v convicted dat feller dat was
swinging a high society bluff so as to
lift jewelry,” said Plodding Pete.
“Yes," answered Meandering Mike.
“He's got bis prisou clothes on now.
Dey've changed him from a social lion
into a aebra."-Washington Star.
At a dinner given by a philanthropist
to the Society of Reformed Criminals a
gentleman complained to his host mid
way through the festivities that he bad
lost his watch. The host was a man of
great Ingenuity. He caused all the
lights to be turned out. Then be ob
served: "Sonic one here has a watch
that does not tielong to him. If by the
time I have counted a hundred It Is r.at
placed on the floor in the middle of the
room, the police will be sent for.” He
i-oonted a hundred, and the light« were
turned on again. Thirty-three hand
some waidles lay In the middle of the
room.
The maker All»ff1a«ro te f'ymr«.
Ralawater Oeed If T«« Like It.
Troaaaaihrail««.
A St. Louis man disregarded a sum
"When a man gets used to drinking
mons to serve on a jury because his rainwater." said a New Orleans man to
marriage to a St. IsJhis woman had the Washington Post, “there is no other
been set for the same hour.
He ■ water in the world that tastes so good.
thought he knew which court order to Most of the people in New Orleans
obey.—Richmond Times.
hsve cisterns In their yards which bold
an abundant supply of water caught
Th« Meed «t Modish Soda Mia«.
Under ordinary social and gastronom- , from the cloude. the pureat and tiest
Ic conditions there Is probably a great In the world, according to my notion.
deal more heartburn than heartburn- i The winter rainfall alone la used, th«
summer catch not lielng desirable. It
Ings.-Indianapolis News.
Is somewhat curious that in northern
Advise an old man to marry a woman latitudes the cistern water does not
young enough to be bis daughter, and | keep wholesome and sweet as It does
he may ask If you take him for a fool, in our country.”
but he will not ba offended Atcblsoa
In the lower depths of the ocean
Globe.
_______
__ ___
some of the fishes go blind, while oth
It Is stated that on the lower Elbe n< ers develop huge eyes. Home are so
Tillage or farm Is free from malaria constructed that they can swallow
Malaria mosquitoes abound.
fiabea much larger than themselves.
I blàk *.
w ÌÌÌ
t I m .“«^ papers
MtFFITT W
ItAPPING ... 1 1,1
i TOWNE
OARO STOCK
...Straw and Binder«* Board...
as-a;-.VH-<ii rtrot street
r»L Maia ISO.
S
SAN FRANCIHCl).
A CITY
EDITOR
Bright’« DUcase and Dlnbotca
Are Positively Curo ble.
Before the businetM men who In corpora ted the
Fulton Oom pounds Invested kbey put them to
the tent in dozen« of cn«e«. Hearing that K
M Wood, the editor und proprietor of The Wine
tnd Spirit Review, of b.M) Montgomery St., had
z certain oane of Bright’« Disease, he wasunruf
thoee urged to teat it. The following letter will
row be under>«t<>od :
•Offir Wine and Spirit Review.
Montgomery St., San Franc I m co.
•’Sept. «1,
“Gee tie men : I oonnkler It my duty to tell
the world whu the Fulton CompouudN did iu
my case. In November, INW, «fter a leug ill*
new», which carried me to the verge of the
grave, a scientific aaalyMih by the most uoted
tDBlyzt In thin city dUclofted chut 1 was « vic-
ttm of Bright’« Di«ea«e My physicinn told me
that mv only hope Uy in a strong oouNtitutiou
and a change to a warm clime. He suggested
Sant« Barbara, and I went there, having falleu
from «25 pounds to lefts than 190 in a «hurt lime,
During my abaenoe in the south a San Frun*
cisco busfnesR man called upon my wife, and
told her of the Fulton Compound; that it was
actually curing Bright’a DtseaMe, and urged
that 1 try it. I began under protest. I boou
felt better. Normal Bleep returned, and iu a
few months I regained mv health. I now weigh
pounds, and enjoy better health than I have
in fifteen years. Naturally I told aeveral
friends, and in every instance the results were
the same, even where they had been suffering
for years. The world ought to know that
Bright’s Disease is at last curable, and appro*
elating my own good fortune, I will be glad to
give further details to interested parties.
“ R. M. W ood ”
Medical works agree that Bright's Disease
and Diabetes are Incurable, but 87 per cent, are
positively recovering under the Fulton Com
pounds. (Common forms of kidney complaint
and rheumatism offer but short resistance.)
Price, |1 for the Bright's Disease and fil 50 for
the Diabetic Compound. John J. Fulton Co.,
<20 Montgomery street, San Francisco, sole
oompounders. Free tests made for patients.
Descriptive pamphlet mailed free.
Save the Baby.
The mortality among babies during the
three teething years is something frightful.
The census of HMW shows that about one iu
every seven succumbs.
The cause is apparent.
With baby's
bones hardening! the fontanel (opening in the
skull) closing up and its teeth forming, all
these coming at once create a demand for
bone material that nearly half the little
systems are deficient in.
The result is
I eevlshness. weakness, sweating, fever, diar
rhoea, brain troubles, convulsions, etc., that
prove terribly fatal. The deaths in 1900 under
I three years were 304,988, to say nothing of
the vast number outside the big cities that
were not reported, and this In the Unit»*!
States alone.
When baby begins to sweat, worry or cry
out in sleep don’t wait, and the need !s
neither medicine nor narcotics.
What the
little system is crying out for is more bone
material. Sweetman’s Teething Food sup
plies it. It has saved the lives of thousands
of babies. They begin to improve within
forty-eight hours. Here is what physicians
think of it.
2934 Washington St.,
San Francisco, June 2, 1902.
Gentlemen—I am prescribing your food in
the multitude of baby troubles due to im
peded dentition
A large percentage of in
fantile ills and fatalities are the result of •
slow teething. Your food supplies what the
deficient system demands, and I have had
surprising success with ?*.. -n scores of cases
this diet, given with their regular food, has
not failed to check the Infantile distresses*
Several of the more serious cases would, I
feel sure, have been fatal without it. It can
not be too quickly brought to the attention
of the mothers of the country. It Is an ab
solute necessity.
U C. MENDEL, M. D.
Petaluma, Cal., September 1, 1902.
Dear Sirs—I have Just tried the teething
food in two cases and in both it was a suc
cess. One was a very serious case, so criti
cal that it was brought to me from another
city for treatment. Fatal results were feared.
In three days the baby ceased worrying and
commenced eating and is now well. Its action
in this case wan remarkable. I would ad
vise you to put It In every drug store in this
city. Yours,
I. M. PROCTOR, M. D.
Sweetman’s Teething Food will carry baby
safely and comfortably through tl.« most dan
gerous jieriod of child life. It renders lanc
ing of the gums unnecessary. It Is the safest
plan and a blessing to the baby to not wait
for symptoms but to commence giving It the
fourth or fifth month. Then all the teeth
will come healthfully, without pain, dis
tress or lancing. It Is an auxiliary to their
regular diet and easily taken. Price &0 cents
(enough for six weeks), sent postpaid on re
ceipt of price. Pacific Coaat Agents. Inland
Drug Co., Mills Building, 8an Francisco.
LOST HIS NERVE.
Wky It W«a That HI« Pete Failed to
Hit the Sheriff.
There were thirty men in the White
Wolf saloon when the sheriff of Silver
county sauntered In to arrest big Fete
Thompson for murder. I’ete was play
ink a hand In a game of poker, and
after nodding to him the sheriff stood
up at the Inr and called for a drink.
His I lack was scarcely turned when
Pete laid down his cards, pulled his
gun and fired six shots as fast ns his
Anger could pull the trigger. The sheriff
never moved. When the smoke had
rollf-d out of the open door and we
could see. the sheriff stood in the same
position and wore the same smile. One
bullet had burned his cheek; a second
bad grazed Ills ea>; a third had ent
through hla shirt collar under the left
ear. Big Pete was r. uead shot, and
yet he had missed bls man at fifteen
feet.
“Got through. Pete?” asked the sher
iff, breaking a silence that was posi
tively painful.
“And you you are not heeled!”
gasped Pete as his arm sunk slowly
down.
“No; come on.”
“You didn’t bring your guns?”
"Nd; !f you are through shooting,
we’ll go.”
Pete laid his two giins..down on the
table before him and walked to the
doer and out Into the street. Ills horse
was tied to a post a block away. He
reached the horse, mounted nnd then
headed down the long street after the
sheriff, who was giving him not the
slightest attention. In five minutes the
pair were out of sight.
"What ailed Pete?" was asked of
the barkeeper, who had come to the
door of the saloon.
“Lost his nerve.” he brusquely re
plied.
“How do yon mean?"
"Why. the sheriff coming without a
gun and standing there to tie shot at
took all his sand away and made a wo
man of him."
"Huppoae the sheriff had had a gun?"
The man Jerked his head toward the
field wherein fifteen or twenty victims
had been burled and said:
“He'd 'a' bln over thar.”
"And will big Pete get clear?”
"Likely; hnt he'll have to leave here.
The lioy* have already put him down
as N »» ”