",.,1 PROMOTION
sMl ROCKY LEDGL
M.
ast
ver qj
By ELMORE E. PEAKE.
Iilrjg. Copyright. 1H by Elmore E. Pcuke.J
potitiiloctcy Icdge was the only station on
ejtlfvlslon where plants enlivened the
Indows ur a canary twittered In the
wtotJkettollleu. It wan the only station
liunthe wiiy frelttlit brakeinan did
Irnr ft pipit tobacco Juice on the platform,
eTonly station whro a delicate, be
en Ijtcjjing scent hovered around the tel
frapli Instrument; the ouly station
llernll eondliftors always peeped In
ishtu see that everything was "O. IC."
g0viuYfaet, there was probably no sta
ler, anfllko It In all southwest Georgia.
Iijsjaudltor's olllee In Savannah never
lumljerrors In the ticket reports sign
rTnJn bold hand "A. Carroll." The
aybjlls and nbstrnets received from
t0 .Carroll always tallied. The travel
ie auditor checked ui) A. Carroll mere-
f aaa matter of form unless Indeed
, uOpcrsonnl eiiuatlon entered Into the
' y-L . . t .. . .. . .... . ',..-....11
ar far
irsc.
unsacuou. .uu yei .. luuuu, uu
t,0l. raprotnlslni; on paper, so Infallible,
CTproinpt. so austere In the porfoim
' 'TieeTof dut.v. was only a Huffy headed
frlja Yankee so called who.se father
adieoiie south to die of consumption
fan-
adj leave his motherless daughter o
:ranger ninom; strangers.
Itocky Ledge was no earthly para-
'isejt Of Its -too Inhabitants three
' nnHha it-if, lil.'tnl. mill thn remainder.
ourths were black, and the remainder.
vo.
HtliT tin. execution of the railroad
maotRcnt herself. ere the trashiest of
white trash." The nearest "jrentle
onRj was at Colonel Singleton's plan
sotiatlon, three miles distant. Hut If Amy
'arroU ever got lonely or sick at heart
" irver pined for the smiling Ileitis of
"iVIscotisIn no one heard of It. She
'""-nlglit grow weary of the eternal pine
barrens that crowded up close to the
ifriifStU" and almost Invaded her back
i acloor; 'In might fear that the ague
of would In fine roll her of her robust
imp;5calth and dye her blooming skin a
totjlckly yellow, she might tremble at
ofdmes for her rellnement among the un
(JerJettered horde nrotmd her. Itut her
fcmlunny face never clouded. The drip
ping brakemen who bedraggled her
niwljlte. clean (loor on tempestuous
U (Jish'ts never missed her bonny words,
v ,4ndf Harney Mefnll. the hamlsomest
1( conductor on the division, swore dally
nbethaTone .f the "little Yank's" smiles
(y Was a better bracer for him than three
yflngers of w 'isky
SJ JWhen Fan-Tan, a notorious colored
K outlaw of the neighborhood, was car
' '$'- ln, Mt'r otliee one night with hi
v liody nearly severed by the dowi
freight and his llfeblood fast oozing
((joway, she bravely sat by him and
(j sponged his brow until he had breathed
f t'Ulsl"st The wild eyed black group
around her on that memorable night
jltifterward declared that Fan-Tan tool:
lr.,Mlsa Amy for an angel and fancied he
oorwn8 In heaven some time before he
5tdled. He might easily have done It,
,,nfother sweet, pit; tig face that night
lie "H white "M ""-v piece of sculp
, tttured marble. On that same night
ijt Colonel Singleton, In the comfortable
hn.ilttlng room of the big plantation
y home, declared, with nn expression not
found In dictionaries, that Amy Car
roll,' Ynnk or no Yank, was a girl after
blslbwn heart.
II Til?ot after your heart, papa," cor
ntrectcd his daughter Charlotte, with a
iseSlyplay upon his words, "but after
Ift-your dutiful son Itod's heart."
It 'Roderick could hardly marry a girl
shilnfuer station, Charlotte," said the
mother with a languor that evinced no
apprehensions.
"Rod could marry a gypsy If she
''were worthy of him," answered Char
j, lotte spiritedly, with a nolo of sisterly
M pride In her voice, and the colonel 1 1 ill
- etlyj- chuckled to himself behind the
pages of his paper.
'About a month later, one night In
early June, No. I'.i. down freight for
gSavatmnh, was wrecked at the sixty
sixth mllepost, one mile below Itocky
mi Ledge. A brakeman Inst his life. A
posse of Indignant planters, assisted
byjihe train crew, seouied the swamp
-Tyf tb dogs for the criminals, and before
sunrise a negro named Fillmore was
PVlaqgllng from the arm of a telegraph
,!l poTT '
11 Tue subsequent excitement nmong
.thoblacks in Rocky I.edgo was Intense.
clthougn manifested In a way character
lstjc of the negro. Their dull, muddy
c'yos and sullen movements were not
. tojbe misinterpreted. With hangdog
looks they slililcd about the settlement
' l3ilusKy groups, mainly oscillating be
"tween the two saloons and giving eui
tqjthelr wrath In rolling eyes, pouting
.lips ami mumbled threats and curM's-
cblldish manifestations, but such as
" with this race may portund the most
terrible outrai.es.
"IJrhe tlrst lolenee was the stoning
from ambush of the north bound pas
-tScnger from Savannah. The news ai
fLpnce s. read over the division by tele
graph At noon the conductor of tin
dow n freight ' looked In ' at the post
little otllce to hcc 1w things st'l
with Miss Aiaj. She told hlin with a
wme that she guessed everything wa
air right, but she did It only because
lie fancied 'hat that was what a mail
would have done. At - o'clock llarii"j
Met alls handsome face, with Its
rmplerllke mustachlos, was thrust In
ike tl'ket wludow. lie got his usual
bracer," but he Imagined It was a III
tUFd.lU'ed.
You're l uk;n a little peaketl. Mlsf
Yank, nlu't you''" he demanded.
rjlaybe, but 1 dou't feel that way,"
be answrri'l cheerily. "I don't think
tbtre w II r' any more trouble, but II
tfcre Is th.w won't hurt me. I didn't
bang Till i.ore "
Ilf'iustly''" asked Harney quizzing
ly? "I ln.ag,ned vou would be Just the
fgtrl to hang a nigger." Then he ndd
bllthesomely, holding out a heavy
revolver "Just shove that In yuji
ffket--or keep It soraewhore hanl'
10 ueedu't get scared. I've alwayii
i u ought to have a pistol, yon
kSow, and now you got one. All you
get to do with that, girl, Is to point
fUt and pull the trigger, and she'll do
tke r nt Its kingdom como to any
ttta; In fr..nt of her. She'll make a
hide in a n'gger that you could fly-
ItfU a Ix'X car through- You needn't
Wf J.lt to see If I'm tellln the truth,
hot if the lime cmes Just rcinombtT
at n:gg. rs will be awful happy In
iu, ws'U an tuem uarps ami
f'er Harney had seen her gingerly
posit the weapon In a drawer and
tad heeii rebuked for his Irreverence
he stepped outside and took n sharp
look aiound. Spying the negro lad
who did the heavy work around the
cgeury. I"1 motioned him forward and
said sun i ply
".Moss. If anything happens to Miss
Carroll toul,'ht I will shoot you to
morrow tnoiulng. Hear?" With which
he swung his hand to the engineer and
Jumped nboard.
At -I o'clock, about the hour that Har
ney's train got Into Savannah, the divi
sion superintendent called up Rocky
"Just thoiv that in your pocket."
Ledge and asked If the railroad proper
ty was In danger. Serious as she felt.
Amy smiled, for she almost knew that
Harney .McCnll was standing beside
the Instrument nt the other end, and
with her mind's eye she could see old
Superintendent Whltcomb's fatherly,
solicitous face as he handled the key
with his own lingers.
"Dou't think you need send guard.
Am not afraid for myself," she clicked
ofT.
"If you nre," came back the prompt
answer, "take -.'I for Savannah."
No. Zi was the passenger that had re
eel veil the stoning on the way up.
When It arrived at r::iO, the conductor
nnd several passengers rushed Into the
olllee to learn the latest news.
"AH O. K. so far," said Amy, feeling
almost heroic.
"Say!" After commanding attention
by this single word forcibly uttered n
short, thickset man with n closely
cropped beard and a peculiarly positive
air pushed forward, pulling and blow
ing. "Is this young woman here going
to stay In this hole all night alone'" he
demanded of no one In particular.
Amy Hushed slightly, ami the con
ductor answered with n grin, "Them
Recin to be her Intentions."
"All right, all right," assented the
positive man with savage abruptness
backing olf. "She wouldn't If she was
my daughter; no, slree, Hob, not If she
was my daughter. And what's more,
she wouldn't If she was my agent.
(lr)d night, young woman. You are a
brave girl."
Amy pondered these words until long
nfter the last faint roar of Z had died
away. She half regretted that she had
not gone In on the train, as she could
taslly have done, and returned In the
morning. Only her pride had restrain
ed her. To fall short of what a man
would do In her place, to ask any privi
leges on account of her sex or even by
any weakness lo remind the company
that Its Itocky I.edge ngent was a wo
man was exceedingly distasteful to her
Independent spirit.
In her loneliness she unconsciously
drew nearer to the busy little Instru
ment which was clicking away like a
thing of life and seeming lo assure her
with cheerful fcarles.st,,"ss that a great
corporation was back of her. And yet
nt everydrunken hoot on the outside
her cheeks took nn an added pallor.
A little before (1 she made a circuit of
the three living rooms nttached to the
station proper and saw that the win
dows mid doors were securely fastened
Hut what frail barriers against an In
furiated mob! Before beginning sup
per she stepped over to Dlggory's store
The butter was not a necessity, but she
felt that a show of bravery would
serve lo keep her courage up nnd might
have a restraining Influence upon the
negroes. The dusky group on the store
porch made hardly a move to let her
through, and Dlggory himself seemed
afraid to show her more than the most
perfunctory courtesy. On by wny
back a fat negress rudely elbowed her
out of the narrow path.
A horseman, perhaps ten minutes aft
er this happening, rode rapidly down
what was known as the Cottonwood
road. The gray horse, the military
bearing of the rider, his slouched hnl
and keen eyes were known far ami
wide as Colonel Singleton's.
As he passed a group of blacks hi
front of Hlackwell's store. Just across
the track from Dlggory's, some Indl
erect fellow, brave In his llnuor, sunt;
out a vile epithet. The old fellow with
n furious oath and veins swelling with
rage spurred Into the midst of the
group regardless of life anil limb ali i
laid his whip with merciless vigor ovei
the face and neck of the offender. K
cry member of the group wns probniilj
nrmcd. but not a hand was raised it
defense of the victim. With a III' i
snort of lue.piebsible ludlgjiatlou and
a parting shower of maledictions the
colonel wheeled out of the sullen
crowd conscious of having dono his
duty. Reflection might hare shown
him that he was not helping thu cause
of the little woman ncross the track,
but the colonel was not nddlcted to re
flection. He found Amy with her apron on,
bending over a sputtering skillet of
ham and eggs.
"Just In time for suppab, by Oawge!"
t-iclalmcd the colonel Jovially. "I've
had mine. I've Just thrashed that buck
of TerrM' within an Inch of his life.
Miss Amy. I'll kill that nigger yet. If
I dou't. the law will sooner or Inter.
JIUs Amy, I susioct there's going to bo
trouble heah tonight. I've a eyah of
watermelons on the siding that I don't
care to lose. So has Majah Hlrd. Has
the majah been In? No! Well, he had
no appointment with roe, but I thought
he might drop In. These country nig
gers are tlocklug In like blackbirds.
Two of 'em left my place this aftah
noon. They left without then wages, I
can assuuh you of that. Miss Amy.
Tb- ha.e got hades enough in 'em
it 1 1 '..in money to buy llquah. Reg
pard' n. Mtss Amy. but I'm a little ex-1
cited. Now. my dcah girl," continued
the colonel with n placid, fatherly air.
refusing a chair. "I want you to come
out to ouah house tonight. Mrs. Sin
gleton and the girls will welcome you
with open ahniM. ns will me sous and
myself-tlguratlvely speaking, of cose,
Miss Amy. Rod Is on the way now
with his hos and phaeton to take you
back, so don't say no, my deah girl,
for, confound It, I won't leave you heah
alone. I wouldn't leae my own daugli
tali heah. and I won't leave you."
Amy colored tu the eyes with pleas
ure, but gently shook her head. "Colo
nel. It Is so good and kind of you," said
she, "but 1 don't believe there Is much
danger. Mr. W'hlteomb wanted me to
come In on IKt. but I refused, and he
supposes 1 am here looking after
things. If I leave. It will only encour
age the negroes to commit some out
rage ou the property. No, colonel, 1
am very, very, very grateful to you"
and she looked up Into his eyes ear
nestly "but I must stay here."
TO UK CO.VTINCKl).
A l.nsl I, Inc.
"It tuny have been unprofessional
conduct." iinld the civil engineer, "hut
1 acted on the spur of the moment, nnd
1 h.ndly think that there was any harm
done. 1 was out In the country one day
on an Important piece of buslncs, nnd
as I was about to leave for the depot
to catch a train for the cly two old
farmers came to me with a line fence
dispute that they wanted me to settle
for them. I had barely time to catch
my train, and I told them that I did not
tare to bother with It. It wns only a
matter of six Inches or so that was In
dispute, and 1 advised them to spilt It
up between them. Hut they wouldn't
listen to my advice, and one of them
declared that If I didn't llnd the Hue
for them he wouldn't let Ills son drive
me to the station as he had promised.
As I had no other way of reaching the
depot I unpacked my Instruments with
a sigh and a mental resolve to end the
thing ns soon as possible.
" Will.' drawled both of the old men
ns I took my eye away from the Instru
ment, 'whar's the line?'
" '(ione,' said I solemnly.
" 'What?' thy both shouted.
" 'You can see for yourselves, gentle
men.' said I. m-.klng wny for them.
" 'Hy gosh, I can't see It!' said one of
them ns he squinted through the glass.
" "I'll be darned If 1 kin either,' said
the other one as he, too. squinted
through the glass.
" "It seems to have disappeared, gen
tlemen,' said 1. 'Such cases are ex
tr"inely rare, but they are known to
happen.'
"When I left, they were accusing
each other of having stolen tho line."
Detroit Free I'ress.
Tin- llfinttiiiili'N Turn.
A boatman in the north of England
having been engaged to row a reverend
gentleman over a rougtpart of a river,
was very much nnnoyed nt the manner
he wns addressed by the clergyman,
the conversation commencing thus:
Clergyman .My dear man, have you
ever studied "geology?"
Ro-itman No, sor; An hevn't.
Clergyman Well, my friend, that's
part of a life lost, but you will proba
bly know a little "theology?"
Hoattunn (turning quite Irritable)
No; An knaw nowt nboot that either.
Clergyman-Well, that's another part
of a llfo lost, my man.
Nothing more wns said, ns tho water
was turning tory boisterous nnd they
were In great danger, when suddenly
the boat gnvc n lurch and wns cap
sized. The boatman, belug nn expert swim
mer, took the situation quite coolly,
while his companion, who knew noth
ing of the urt of swimming, wns strug
gling for life. The bontmnn, who wns
making good progress toward terra
tlrnia. nccostiil the clergymnn with the
following:
"Aa say. mister, do ye kno"- otiny-
thing nboot 'swlmology ?' "
"No. my man; I don't."
"Wey, what n pity," said tho boat
man; "there's n wholo llfo lost"
Pearson's.
MIMnkiMi 1-iip Sluiftn.
A story Is told of a pair of feet that
must have bit'ii objects of great regard
In their day.
One day n party of men. Including
Jackson, the man of big feet, were
preparing to attend n political meeting.
It was soon discovered Mint there was
no wny of conveying Jackson, ns all
the vehicles were full.
"Let me ride that horse over there?"
nsked Jackson.
"There Isn't n man In the world that
ran ride that animal. He'll work to a
cart or a plow, but no one can stay on
his back."
"I'll try him, anyway." And tho deter
mined mnu Instructed several men to
catch and hold the horse.
The animal plunged and kicked, but
Anally Jackson secured a seat In the
saddle.
Rvery ono expected to see htm dash
ed to tho ground, but tho horse looked
round, saw the iiinn'H feet and walked
peacefully away. Ho thought he wns
between pair of shafts. London
Standard.
IIU Hlrtliilny.
Although unrivaled In the art of
cross examination, on one occasion
Lord Russell was distinctly beaten by
i witness.
"What Is your age?" he asked.
"Is It my nge you are asking?" re
plied the witness.
"Yes, sir. Now speak up nnd be ex.
act."
"And be exactl Well, of all the"-
"The court does not desire to hear
any comments of yours. Tell the court
your age."
"Well," said the man, "I celebrated
my twelfth birthday last week."
"Don't trifle with the court and re
member you are on oath."
"It's quite true. I was born on Feb.
0, In leap year, and my birthday only
comes once In four years."
Wlirre lh- Danurr Wm,
A little beyond h certain Scotch vil
lage the main road has u marked de
illvlty, aud this added to u sharp turn
at the bottom decided the authorities to
erect a danger lionrd. The Job was In
trusted to an old worthy, who duly
Hied up the warning at the foot of tho
hill.
"What's wrang with the Imttom of
the brae, ye thundering IdtotV" ex
claimed a village dignitary angrily.
Man, there's everything wrang,"
came the curt reply "Is It no there
where a' the accldeuts take place?"
HER SUMMONS CAME.
A SIGN IN WHICH MRS. GALLUP READ
HER DEATH WARRANT.
She llmpiieit the DNlicloth nml After
Tlinl rami WnrnliiB Spent the Hal
nuee of the i:rnliiK In TetlltiK Sir.
Gnllnp I tun- She TlmiiRlit He Ouxht
lo Uun (he rniieral,
tCopytlclit, 1W0, by C. n. UwU.
As Mr. Oallup lighted his tin lantern
after supper and started out to buy
hnlf a pound of Rio cofTeo for break
fast and call nt the postotllce Mrs. Gal
lup wns In excellent spirits nnd had
most of the dishes ready for washing.
He was absent 3- minutes, nnd when
he arrived home he found her huddled
up In the big rocking chair, with a pil
low behind her head and the camphor
bottle in her blind. She took three long
snltl's nt the bottle nnd gave three long
drnwn sighs as ho entered, but It was
labor thrown away. Mr. Gallup blew
out his lantern and hung It up behind
the cellar door, and, having deposited
the coffee on n shelf In the pantry, ho
removed and hung up his coat and lint,
sat down and took off his shoes nnd
then, taking u circular from his pock
et nnd putting on his glasses with
great deliberation, begun to rend. It
was a circular regarding n new discov
ery In the euro of consumption, nnd ho
had not yet finished with the llrst tes
timonial when Mrs. Gallup sobbed four
times In succession and faintly asked:
"Samuel Gnllnp, do you know thnt
your dyln wife Is present In the room?"
He ninde no reply. Thnt testimonial
from one who had been cured nftcr
Ids colllii had been purchased made
him hold his breath as he read.
"Yes; she Is present," dolefully con
tinued Mrs, Gallup after several sniffs
nunnLKi) ur i.v the mo kockino cn.un.
nt the bottle, "mid she wants to hev a
few Inst wolds with you. When you
stinted over town, I wns slngln 'Har
bara Allen' and thhikln my days might
be long In this Intnl. Not live mlnlts
later the summons come. 1 had Just
started to wash the dishes, and I hud
that cracked blue platter in my hand,
but 1 hadn't gin It over two wipes
when the dishcloth fell to the floor
with u great spat. You are hearln
what I say, ain't you, Samuel?"
Mr. Gnlitip wasn't. He wns devour
ing tho second testimonial, which gnvo
the case of u woman who had been
given up by over W) doctors, nnd yet
two bottles furnished her with u new
pair of lungs.
"Winn that dishcloth fell, I knew
that my time had come. That's the
way Mrs. Grover and Mrs. Taylor
went. Their dishcloths fell, mid In - I
hours they was In heaven. I shall bo
up there by tomorrer night, Samuel,
while you'll be free to stay out all
night to hear the political news. I'd
hev died before you come back home,
ouly 1 wnuteil to talk with y mi a lectio
about the fimerul. Let's see. If I die
tonight, you'll hold the funeral day aft
er tomorrer, won't you, at " o'clock In
the afternoon?"
Mr. Gallup was listening to n iiolso
outside. He heard something to re
mind him of u lieu trying to crow, nnd
he '"omlered If It could be that so long
after dark.
"If you want It a day sooner, you
can hev It," continued Mrs. Gnllnp
nfler sobs mid gasps mid sniffs nt tho
bottle, "but you must look out or the
tiayburs will tnlk. Hetter hev It day
after tomorrer, and I hope, for your
sake, It won't be u rainy day. I've
sometimes thought I'd like n big fu
neral when I went, with oer 10 wag
ons In the ptirccsslon and the church
bell n-lollln nml tho dugs n-howilu, but
I've given that up. No. Samuel, you
needn't make any spread over me. I'm
one of the kind that kin go to heaven
tvlthout nny liuriah and fireworks, If
there Is ten wagons In the purcesslon,
1 shall be satislled. Don't you think
ten ought to be 'uulT for a person llko
me?"
It wasn't a direct question, but had
It been Mr. Gallup would not have
answered. He was devouring the third
testimonial and making up his mind
to try a bottle mi the sly.
"Ten wugous In the purcesslon, Sam
uel, and the bells needn't toll nor
uiithln else happen. If anybody Is
dlggin Inters or tiinklu soft soap or
ilyeln carpet rags, they needn't stop on
my account If U5 people como to thu
house, that will be 'nuff. We've got
ieven chairs al!';'ellier, cnuulln them
with broken backs, nml .Mrs. Wnlters
will lend you the rest. You'll hev our
own preacher, of course, but he needn't
go on for nn hour or two and tell how
good I wns nnd how much you'll miss
mo. If ho says that my toll Is o'er, aud
that you won't never Dud a more savlu
wife, that'll be uIkjui 'nulT. Shall you
do any cry In at the funeral, Samuel?"
No answer.
"I'd do a leetle hit If I was you Jest
a leetle. If )uu dou't, folks will talk
about It same as they did about Jim
Dewltt. He in'ter cried at nil, aud to
this day folks say ho didn't use Hau
uer right. I don't nsk you to break
down unci si and git up an excite
meut, but you kin gasp a few times aud
wipe your ej.s and blow your nose.
I'm sorry you II hev to take thnt long
ride the graveyard, as you could be
playln checkers or sunthln, but I don't
bee how you aro to git out of It. How
ever, you wun't never hev to go up
theie ngin. When you git ready to
buy me a gimotun, you kin send It
up by u mini I K'piwo you'll buy a
stun of some sort, won't you?"
Mr. Gallup didn't hear. In the fourth
testimonial a man declared that he had
been saved afti r one whole lung nnd
threo-quarters of tho other were gone,
and It was a sketch to thrill tho reader
char down t" his toes,
"Of iour' 1 dn't keer nbout no
pravestun foi m.wlf," said Mrs. Gul-
lup ns she tiled to wipe away her tears
with the glass stopper of the bottle
"but If you don't put one up the mi
burs will call you stingy. Get ti cheap
one, however. If you kin ;:V one far
?10 nud trade n lot of carpet uigs in,
I'd do It. I used to think 1 wanted n
whole lot of rendln on my grnvestun,
but I've changed my mind. Jest put
on that Susan Gallup expired In the
forty-ninth year of her ago of glncrnl
disability and that she has found rest
where asthma, bolls, backaches nnd
rheutuatlz cense from troublln. Yon
needn't say n word nbout makln -10
yards of rag carpet and n bar'l of soft
soap last year while elijoyln sore eyes
nnd a boll on my arm or thnt I alius
kept catnip, sinartweed and pepper
mint herbs In the house and wns n
nurse to nil the nnyburs. No, Samuel,
you needn't say a word about them
things. Mnke It n cheap grnvestun,
nnd you needn't never go up there
nnd -and"
And when Mr. Gallup had Mulshed
the testimonials and fully determined
lo buy nt least three bottles and hide
them In the wood shed he rose up.
yawned nnd stretched nnd looked
n round to llnd Mrs. Gnllnp nsleep nnd
the cninplior wanted oti the floor.
M. Quad.
THERE WASN'T ANY ROW.
II Wnn Simply n Cnae of Spoiitatie
mm (.'mnliuntliiit.
He was a very young man, nlmost
too young to be out on tho street nt
that time of the night, S::iO p. in., and
his general appearance Indicated that
he had been picked up by a cyclone
somewhere during his meandering.
He wns not utterly demoralized, hut
there was something In his manner
that would lead the close observer to
the conclusion that all had not been
well with him.
"Gee!" he exclaimed ns he spun
around the corner nud went buiup Into
n policeman.
"Hello." ejaculated that worthy. In
stinctively grabbing nt him; "what's
the row?"
"There wasn't any." responded the
youth.
"What are you running llko that
for?" persist, -d the policeman.
"I've just been up against a case of
spontaneous combustion."
"You look loo green to burn," chuc
kled the blueeont.
"It's on me. Just the same. My girl
lives around the corner, and I went to
see her. I thought It was nil"
"Where does the combustion como
In?" Interrupted the olllcer.
"Come out, you mean," corrected the
youth. -
"Come off!" exclaimed the olllcer.
"Tell me what the row Is before I
liiaco you."
"Well, that's what I'm trying to do,"
pleaded the boy. "The girl's old man
and I don't harmonize n little bit, nnd
when he met me nt the door he II red
me so suddenly thnt I had vertigo. If
you don't rail that spontaneous com
bustion, what the dickens do you call
It?"
"Oh, excuse me," apologized the po
liceman, ",oti run along home nml get
Inl i your tiuudle bed!" and the blue
coat gently w nfted the remnant ou Its
way. Detroit Free lieos.
The (Mil Climtnuti,
It l said that a certain Cleveland
lady whose handsome house Is In nn
iiltiiifnsliloiirble section of thu city wns
called east while her homo wns under
go, ng the ivuoviitlng nml refurnishing
pii.io.s. During her absence n man
wns especially engaged to hung the pic
tuns. Among them were u number of
excellent copies of the world's greatest
woi Us of i.i t. ami the man, an artist,
found his task a labor of love.
With great care he hung the moru
Miluuble copies In the roomy reception
hall ami had Just finished his task
when the Indy returned.
Her eyes snapped as who surveyed his
work.
"Who hung those old chestnuts
there?" sheclird.
"Old musters, madam," said tho star
tled artist.
"old chestnuts, I say; It's tho same
thing. If vou hung ihem, take them
down. I won't hnvo them there. With
;ew furniture and new decorations and
new carpels nud rugs I'll hnvo new
picture too. Who fwr heard of such
old trumpery htulf In a strictly modern
house?"
"And what shall I do with the-the
old rheniums, mudaiii?" the artist In
quired. "Oh. dump them Into the it tic until I
can get rid of them," replied the lady.
And there the "chestnuts" lie, Mil
dunlins and cherubs and all, gathering
dust nud calmly awaiting the getting
rid of process.-Cleveland I'lnlti Denier.
Ileiillnu l.oeonifilUea.
Hundreds of locomotives nro rented
every yeur. Several corporations mnko
their chief revenue this way. The
Baldwins have miiiiy machines out on
the rental form of payment-thar Is,
tin- engines are rented In the same way
(hat you would buy u stove on Install
im tits so much down, so much n
month, the payments to apply on tho
tlmil purchase money. It Is seldom,
however, that a railroad rents locomo
tives. They are usually let out to con
tractors who construct temporary rail
ways for hauling dirt from excava
tions. Contractors who hire the locomotives
usually bine their own mimes glided
on them so thnt tho public may suppose
that they belong to them. The engines,
ns a usual thing, are cast oils. They
may have pulled express trains once,
but now they nre only lit to pull gravel
cars. The englni'"iM who work them
are oftentimes ulito the cast olfs of the
profession. They may have operated
express engines, but through careless.
I less or other Incapacity hae been dis
charged from one rovd after another
until they are only lit to haul gravel or
wood trains.- liillndclphia Record.
Tbr Coni'Mlnl Terr,
, ..,.,,.lt,l tuililiiuiriM nnr'ii
i in nun vw,,,. , ........
olerved to Charles Townseiid, "When
, i ..i
I happen to bay n looumi iiiiiik.
ways burst out n-laughlng." Town
I ....... I l.l.r, .,i(niiuli' mill fit lllflft1l
hl'UU l11 vuttw,.". - n -
remarked In the most deliberate man
ner, "Ah, 1 envy you your iiappinuss.
for you must certainly live the merri
est life of nny man In Rurope."
When you are Invited lo a real old
fashioned woman's house for supper,
she always has floating Island This Is
a sure test.-Atchison Globe.
1HE MtMESS OF SCIBIGE
Drills Now Give Way
to Animal Tissue
l:eli CoiiHiimptlon, l:pllcpty mul
Some Popiuh of Inswinlty
nee Now Curnblc
A new era in tlie treatment ofcertnln
discuses Is at hand. The results nro so
definite nnd positive us to command
immediate recognition from physicians
us well ns laymen. In the new treat
ment drugs give wny to uiilmal tissues
in solution. It Is not administered
through the. stomach but is injected Into
the circulatory system. The lylitpli
Used is extracted from the lyniplmtle
glands of live goats, iim oat isselcct
ed for the reason that lie Is the hardiest
nud healthiest of all animals. He can
not even bo Inoculated with consump
tion or mleroblo diseases, lils highly
vitalized system throw Ing oil' bacilli
without ell'ort. Then again old age pro
duces the least cU'cct on his organs and
tissue mid dcgcncrutcdiscnscs arc seldom
If ever found Inlils body. Little marvel
then that the daily Injection of n solu
tion of the lymphatic glands of the goat
Into it weakened human system puts
resisting qualities Into it and stimulates
the activity or cell life, both dispelling
disease and putting siilislanco into the
structure. An Interesting proof or the
action or the l.Tinph Is shown by the
fact that old animals who have been
treated become active, quicker and
more agile In their movements. Dis
tinguished physicians In iiiuiiy places
have taken hold of the new lymph nnd
for the benent or the profession the re
sults or their experiences are being tub
ulated. During three yearn up to Feb,
llrst over nineteen hundred etises hud
been healed In the United Klnlesnloiie.
Of this number To percent were so culled
Incurable discuses and 1 1 percent III the
last stages. The averages of their ages
was fid years. Only two of the number
died although according to the tables
or mortality fill should have died within
the three yenrs. In view ortho percent
age or Incurables nt lens) US should have
died. Hut note tho astounding results;
the failure were but 7 per cent, while
li'ij percent were greatly benelltleil and
(17 per cent were complete cures. The
cures include many consumptives and
many eases or ilieiliimtisni, paralysis,
epilepsy, and locomotor ataxia. Aside
from the marvel Hint consumption and
paralysis ate at last curative tile dis
covery wns made that certain forms
of Insanity icudlly yield to It.
Tho positive nnd startling results
nro profoundly impressing. U It.
Stablein M, I), a very prominent
ICusterii expert, who litis been making
n special study of the new lymph and
bus administered It to hundicilsof eases
suecessrully, lias recently opened u
lymph Institute In Sim Francisco
nt 1-H Kearney St. Full Information
containing tabulations ami other le-
cords ureases by mull to physicians and
others Inquiring. Dr. Stablein lias
promised the records of some interest
ing cures of consumption for lliei-e col
umns for future issues.
( film elm filul Cut.
All old time remedy to stop blood
flowing from n cut Is to put cobwebs
over It, but from recent discovery It ap
pears a dangerous thing to do. Somo
time ago n woman fell and cut her
head, and when her friends hurried to
her assistance they found tho blood
flowing from a deep gash. Cobwebs
were applied, and tho bleeding quickly
stopped, but In n few days the woman
was taken with lockjaw.
A scientist declared there were lock
Jaw genua In cobwebs, and that wns
tho wny the woman contracted tho dis
ease. Do has made quite n study of
the subject and says that In a handful
of cobwebs ho found (II different dls
ciiho germs. That being true, It Is very
easy to see how one could get not only
lockjaw, but many other dreadful ills
cntcs, as the cobweb Is placed right on
an open wound and I he germs can en
ter the blood. Cobwebs form In dark,
dirty places, aud It Is not to bo won
dered thnt they gather germs. Hx
change. Tin- ofilt-si VUliliitr Cnril.
Tho state archives of Venice nro said
to possess the oldest visiting card of
which there Is any record, of course
leaving aside the probable uso of such
articles for some thousands of yenrs In
China. Glaeomo Coiitarlul, professor
at the University of I'adiia, sent tin
card In question as a curiosity to u Ve
netian friend, saying that the German
students who came to Italy had the ele
glint and laudable hinIoiii of leaving
such little cards, with their name and
place of origin, at the houses of friends
when they called nml found them nh
sent. The card referied to hears a coat
of arms with (lie motto, "Rspolr n.e
confort." nnd beneath, "Joannes Wes
terhof WestphaliiH sciihebat I'litavll I
Martll loiO." London Tablet.
I'rnpe on Iliu lloiir.
The custom of placing crape ou the
door of a house where there has been a
recent death had Its origin In the an
cient Rimllsli heraldic customs ami
dates hack to the year 1100 A. D- At
that period hatchments, or armorial
ensigns, weie placed In front of houses
when the nubility or gentry died. The
hatchments wuro of diamond shape
uiid contained the family anus quar
tered and covered with sable.
A Helpful HiiuunlliHi.
"Kin ycou tell me, young feller," In
quired Mr. Reuben liny of Four Cor
ners, "where hereabouts 1 klu git me a
good farmer suit?"
"Why, there's a good pharmaceutist
not two blocks away," replied the
young fellow blithely, Harper's Ra
zor. .Sill True lo la .Nniiie,
"Didn't you start out with a play
called Turned Adrift?'" usked the
friend.
"We did." replied that eminent trage
dlnn aud repertory actor, Mr. Harms
Tormer. "but we couldn't get nuybody
to tlout It "- Indianapolis I'ress,
i DLnrxL".
IruiwriurK nnd Dealers In
MOFFITT
& TOWNE
tlooU, Nowii,
Writing unit
Wrapping.,,
CARD 8TO0K
SntAW AND lU.Nnr.KS' ltOAllU
flri-67-ru.il , rirxt. Ht.
Til. main 109. ? t AN litANXiSCO.
Help . . .
Wanted
To rebuild ntir business on n sure cash
basis. No Uok premium iiroixisHlon
All settlements cash. Only a few dol
lars capital needed to make money
quickly ami honestly. Hetter thnii
carrying stock or having; a store.
Kvcrvono paid liberally. Applicants
should have some ability or experi
ence In liaiidlliigmerehamllse. Write
for particulars lo Haiici.ay .1. Smith,
Manager SMITH'S CASH STORK,
Market St.. Sail Francl-co, Cnl.
THE! E1L-K
Y Y 1-
nt.0 Hush Street, Sun I'piiiicIhso
Nicely furnished renins 113- the ilajr, week or
month, en siiltn or suikI" at rciluiTil riites,
limine thoroughly renoviilnl No lmlns "111 Ihj
spared lo iiuik.it visitors f-mnttu' country to tho
city comtortuUlit nml nt homo ilut mi; their stay.
Talti Saturate , t c.ir-i nt t.i iy uindlDi?
MKH. 1'. It AN IT, Proprietor.
BAD COLDS
(Julian, i-lnv .irs ImIiii d. ( .Ids itn not now
hnotoiii 1'IiiIiiimI MtMit'1 s Dvnamic Tail
ci.ks c'nllt'il ON iNiiiuu from Ihi 11 cuerJ 1 croud
u ui'i-k's onliiiury trctitii.i'nt Into 11 hount nud
abort the uurst of culds out liltthl,
" It was the worst ca-.i' of im-Ih I ever had A
ImltitnzKti frlimls lm l suro inn s SHU llhunit
ou. lli iird or tho Pi n VMe TAIil l.rs To my
immzi-mrul tin-) stoiiit-d Willi mid and couidi
tho llrst tiltfht. 1 uii'lnrso and rtTottimi-nd
tliom to tho iii'iiplo " ll.M11 l,u Ii:ni.i; r.x
MomtitT Coniirt'si and Atlnrni'y KM hulisoma
Street, Sun I'ruiiclsco. J ily 7, lini
"Winter colli fiiuo aln.s tx-nn sirloti.
thtiiKs to mo. Tlit-y are hunt nnd stay fo
months. Hut tho last uim stoppi'il sudilculy
I)' MKNIIKI.'H IIVNAMIU CAIIl'I.KS. lloMl COUKtl
and cold dlsaH)'.iriHl In it couplo of days. No.
IhlnitrtlMO iloi-K tills for 11111 " Mils, Kmma Ij.
UoI.i.in, II Moss St., Sun 1'runclNi-o. Auk. (I, til
" 1 1 1 0 noross llto street from whom Mkmiki.'s
DvNAMIi- Taiiiii.kh am mudo. 'I hut Is how 1
llrst look. (html. Thev stop folds it llliout notti-r
1 look u dooil bnxn Willi mo forsrlf and f Ii-ihIh
whi'ii I wont to Nome " II. 1, Van Winki,.
1'iiplliillst, :M7 Washington Hlrii't, Hun l-'run-i'lsi'0,
AiikuhI IU, lino.
Si'nt tmstpuld for UTi conts In stamps lit
INI, AMI) lllttni ('(1. iMI WiishliiKtoii Street
Situ 1'ruuclM'O. Aim 011 kulo liy uur local itiii nl
C. Y. Lowe, Druggist.
Printers5
Snaps,
Kooltct' News Ciihch.
We liavit several hundred pairs of thus
cases. They nru 11 trlllo smaller than
full size Were used liy two loudlnit
dallies hefore l.tno's citiuo In. They ure
lust the size to faFllltato coiiiH)slllon
in perfect order, l'llly cents per pair
Fine (ioi'don ilobbce.
Now style, HxlJ. second-hanil, with
throwsilt; in tlrst-clus condition 1 1 in
side slimiii llitun s anil Is one of tho
IhjhI Hui'oud-hutid presses wo tmvouitd
font long time. Itlsusnup.
Kccond-liiiiid Cylinder.
S. column quorlo. Will work IM) un
hour. A hurt! ulu fur it country dally
Some Kody nnd DlHplny Type.
Has not seen nnu month's use Somu ol
It hurdly sunned. Kecond-uuud prices
PACIFIC STATES TYPE FOUNDRY
fi()8 Clny Street, S. IJ.
Till" .Neuli'i-leil Voice,
The Milce Is the most cominuli ami at
the same time the most complex of till
Mill II faellltli'S. Whi'll we listen to It,
wo realize iwtlilnn of the many in tin
ences nt work In Its use. Vet It reprc
scuts the character, the mood, the tem
peiiimeul and the health of the Individ
unl when left to run In Its own way
If uncontrolled, it will develop much as
a Mower ifnrdea will develop; the rank
and weedy nature will come to the
front, and the tones of exquisite beau
ty will be ohteurcd. Had dally habits
In the llkV of the voice will Blve It
many dlsiiKieeiihle qualities. If con
trolled, the voice will keep Its weeds In
the backKroiind nml permit only Its
beauties lo be known. If cultivated,
the weed will be taken out mid the
llowers developed. -I'ltttiburj, I'ress.
All t'lllll-'l'll lll-Hlllt.
"Vou know how siipvralltlous lllox-
llll III IS"
"Is he'"
"Yes; he picked up n pin In the Btreet
the other day with the point turned di
rectly toward him."
"(Jo on."
"An hour nfierwurd he received a tel
fCrnm annoiincinK the death of an un
cle from whom he hadn't heard for sev
eral years."
"Ami the uncle died Immensely rich
nml left hlin all his property''"
"Not much! He had to pay the fu
neral expenses." Cleveland Plain
lil MKT.
Xii lliimiir In TIii-iii.
filled I don't like that barber's fun
ny anecdotes.
Mllca-Why, what's wrontf with
them?
C lies The Illustrations nro painful.
Miles The lllmtratlons?
(Illes-Ves; hi uses original cuts.
Chicago NewH.
I'iiy.
Ilcnhnin Thoro Isn't room hero to
Buink' a cat.
Mrs. llenhniu Then wo won't haven
cat. Hrooklyn Life.
3liicli Hip giimr,
Mrs. Hayseed Did you bo to hear
tho howiliik' dervishes while you were
In the city?
Mr. Hayseed No, hut I went to Cous
in Miranda's, and she's cot twins.
New York Weekly.