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About Smoke signals. (Grand Ronde, Or.) 19??-current | View Entire Issue (July 1, 1991)
Smoke Signals '.'Jafy'1991 page 8 HEALTH AND EDUCATION NEWS TEN THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT ANGER By Dr. David Burns 1. The events of this world don't make you angry. Your "hot thoughts" create your anger. Even when a genu inely negative event occurs, it is the meaning you attach to it that determines your emotional response. The idea that you are responsible for your anger is ultimately to your advantage because it gives you the opportunity to achieve control and make a free choice about how you want to feel. If it weren't for this, you would be irreversibly bound up with every external event of this world, most of which are ultimately out of your control. 2. Most of the time your anger will not help you. It will immobilize you, and you will become frozen in your hostility to no productive purpose. You will feel better if you place your emphasis on the active search for creative solutions. What can you do to correct the difficulty or at least reduce the chance that you'll get burned in the same way in the future? This attitude will eliminate to a certain extent the helplessness and frustrations that eat you up when you feel you can't deal with a situation effectively. If no solution is possible because the provocation is totally beyond your control, you will only make yourself miserable with your resentment, so why not get rid of it? It's difficult if not impossible to feel anger and joy simultaneously. If you think your anger feelings are especially precious and important, then think about one of the happiest moments of your life. Now ask yourself, how many minutes of that period of peace or jubilation would I be willing to trade in for feeling frustration and irritation instead? 3. The thoughts that generate anger more often than not will contain distortions. Correcting these distortions will reduce your anger. 4. Ultimately your anger is caused by your belief that someone is acting unfairly or some event is unjust. The intensity of the anger will increase in proportion to the severity of the maliciousness perceived and if the act is seen as intentional. 5. If you learn to see the world through other people's eyes, you will often be surprised to realize their actions are not unfair from their point of view. The unfairness in these cases turns out to be an illusion that exists only in your mind! If you are willing to let go of the unrealistic notion that your concepts of truth, justice, and fairness are shared by everyone, much of your resentment and frustration will vanish. 6. Other people usually do not feel they deserve your punishment. Therefore, your retaliation is unlikely to help you achieve any positive goals in your interactions with them. Your rage will often just cause further deterioration and polarization, and will function as a self-fulfilling prophecy. Even if you temporarily get what you want, any short-term gains from such hostile manipulation will often be more than counterbalanced by a long-term resentment and retaliation from the people you are coercing. No one likes to be controlled or forced. This is why a positive reward system works better. 7. A great deal of your anger involves your defense against loss of self-esteem when people criticize you, disagree with you, or fail to behave as you want them to. Such anger is always inappropriate because only your own negative distorted thoughts can cause you to lose self-esteem. When you blame the other guy for your feelings of worthlessness, you are always fooling your self. 8. Frustration results from unmet expectations. Since the event that disappointed you was a part of "reality", it was "realistic". Thus, your frustration always results from your unrealistic expectation. You have the right to try to influence reality to bring it more in line with your expectations, but this is not always practical, especially when these expectations represent ideals that don't correspond to everyone else's concept of humans nature. The simplest solution would be to change your expectations. For example, some unrealistic expecta tions that lead to frustration include: a. If you want something (love, happiness, a promotion, etc.) I deserve it. b. If I work hard at something I should be sue ccssful. c. Other people should try to measure up to my standards and believe in my concept of "fair ness". d. I should be able to solve any problems quickly and easily. e. If I'm a good wife, my husband is bound to love me. f. People should think and act the way I do. g. If I'm nice to someone they should recipro cate. 9. It is just childish pouting to insist you have the right to be angry. Of course you do! Anger is legally permitted in the United States. The crucial issue is, is it to your advantage to feel angry? Will you or the world really benefit from your rage? 10. You rarely need your anger in order to be human. It is not true that you will be an unfeel ing robot without it. In fact, when you rid yourself of that sour irritability you will feel greater zest, joy, peace and productivity. You will experience liberation and enlightenment. Courtesy of ELWHA Newsletter EDUCATION CUTS PAINFUL TO STUDENTS This was the title of an article in the Statesman Journal Newspaper (Salem), June 15th, 1991. The article carried a message of upcoming activities that will have grave effects on our college students. "In February the State Board of Higher Education presented solutions to the legislature which cut 700 jobs, reduced enrollment by more than 6,000 students, closed 65 academic programs and reduced 25 other programs. In addition, the Board of Higher Educa tion recommended that students pay a surcharge of $ 600 a year on top of regular tuition increases of 6.7 for universities and 5 for colleges." At this point in time it appears the Ways & Means Educa tion Sub Committee approved a bill that would add $ 53 million to higher education. Hopefully, this additional money would maygo toward reducing certain costs, such as the "surcharge from $ 600 to $ 500 ." The Statesman also reported that instead of cutting student enrollment by 6,000 students, only 2,000 students would be cut. All of this brings up the ugly question of whether or not the Tribe will set a maximum ceiling on the Higher Education Grants awarded by the Education Program. During the summer months, the Tribal Education Committee and Education staff will be meeting to discuss what the pro posed higher educational changes mean. The Education Committee and staff will review the current process for awarding students, (picking up the UNMET NEED por tion of educational budgets); look at numbers of continuing & new students, and reviewing projected funding base for the 1991-1992 school year. Regardless of what direction the State Board takes, all Tribal Higher Education participants will be affected. You will have to pay a tuition increase per term of approximately $ 167 to $ 200 dependent on how the additional $ 53 million is utilized by the State. In the June '91 issue of the SMOKE SIGNALS, several areas of concern and possible changes were listed. It is likely we may possibly have to move adopt several changes. These options include; a maximum ceiling on per term assistance, non-replacement of the Perkins or Stafford student loans, and non-replacement of College Work Study, if we are going to assist all higher education and adult vocational training students. At this point in time, whatever the outcome, all students need to realize, some adjustment will be realized. The Tribal Education Pro gram will make every effort to make any changes less painful than what might be expected. Student wishing more information can contact the Educa tion Program by calling 1-800-422-0232 (in State) or (503) 879-5211 (out of State).
