Warm Springs, Oregon
February 21, 1992 PAGE 7
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Keeping a roof over
Keeping a roof overhead is an
important concern when you lose
income. If you rank your bills in
order of priority, chances arc hous
ing is at or near the top of the list.
When you're under the financial
stress of reduced or lost income, one
of the biggest expenses is housing.
Housing expenses include (in most
situations) mortgage or rent pay
menu, insurance, taxes, household
maintenance and repair, utility bills,
furnishings and cleaning supplies.
When your income drops, careful
planning can help you avoid eviction
form your rental unit or the loss of
your house.
Cancer booklet discusses Important issues
Aooroximately six million
Americans have had cancer. A
' . 'i
guidebook called Facing Forward: A
Guide for Cancer Survivors, is now
available to help them and others
know what to expect after treatment
Issued by the National Cancer In-stitutc,the43-page
illustrated booklet
reviews important survivor issues.
For example, some cancer patients
experience severe anxiety months or
yean after treatment This anxiety
usually decreases over time.
Facing Forward offers practical
ideas to nelp survivors and family
members, such as:
Be kind to yourself. Focus on what
you want to do, instead of what you
should do.
Help others. Reduce stressful
brooding by reaching out
Say no. Stay in control with a
polite but firm refusal.
Talk about your concerns. Reduce
anxieties by talking to a friend or
health professional.
Pace yourself. Stop before you
get tired.
Nurturing family members
Here are several ways you can
nurture and strengthen your family.
1. Express sincere appreciation to
your partner and children for indi
vidual acts of kindness, helpfulness
and thoughtfulness.
2. Plan more family activities that
everyone finds enjoyable. Say no to
some outside demands that are less
important than your family.
Be aware second time around
Be realistic about financial obli
gations from a previous marriage and
their effects on the budget for a new
marriage.
When one or both partners have
been married before, the financial
situation is usually more complex
than in the first marriage because of
the number of people involved with
prior financial obligations. Alimony
and child support from a previous
marriage puts financial pressure on
the new marriage.
That's why it's important for the
couple entering a second marriage to
take a complete look at their assets
and liabilities, specialists stress.
It is suggested that each partner
prepare a net worth statement so that
each can see the assets and debts the
other brings to the new marriage.
Look particularly at existing debts,
how they will be paid and when they
will be paid in full.
Debts can be paid by the indi
vidual from his or her own income or
they may be the responsibility of the
couple from their common income.
Review the assets each person
brings to the marriage. Will the assets
of each remain separate property or
will they become joindy owned?
What happens to assets if the mar
riage ends in death or in divorce?
A premarital agreement may be
appropriate when one or both partners
have been married before. The
agreement can help clarify issues of
money, property and prior financial
commitments
When caring for
"Your mother can no longer live
alone," the doctor says. Most of us
aren't ready to hear that statement and
have avoided planning for it
A rash reaction often follows. You
may rush home and tell your family
you must quit your job to care full time
for your ailing mother this is the typical
response of an adultdaughter suddenly
aced with the responsibility of parent
caring. But it is not always the best
solution.
It's an impulsive decision. Alter
natives have not been explored, other
family members have not been con
sulted, and most importantly, the aging
parent probably was not included in the
decision-making process
Such hasty decisions usually are
unwise, bring stress and heartache, and
canbedamagmgtofamflyrelaticciships.
Of course, different degrees of pa
rental dependence require different
degrees of assistance. There are several
factccstoconsiderwhenanagingparent
needs help.
First assess your own abilities ana
limitation in being able to help. For
example, you mightask yourself, "Can
Mother and I really live happily in the
same house?" Think about what you
your head while unempioyed sometimes a difficult task
Rent Payments
If you rent, tell your landlord about
your situation before the rent is due.
Ask for a temporary postponement
until your income resumes. Offer to
provide some service, such as paint
ing in exchange for rent Suggest
making smaller payments for a month
or two with the understanding that
you will catch up when your income
increases again.
Deciding Which Bills to Pay
First
When you're between jobs, the
paychecks may stop coming but the
bills don't When yoj don't have
enough money to cover your basic
Give in sometimes. Not every ar
gument is worth winning.
Exercise. Release tension and ag
gression in a positive way.
Make time for enjoy able activities,
whether a hobby, club or special
project
Set priorities. Divide your list into
manageable parts.
Solve problems. Identify the
problem and write it down so it's
clear in your mind, list the options,
and choose a plan. List the steps to
carry it out set a deadline and act
Focus on the positive. Think about
all the good things you have done.
Eat and sleep properly. Maintain
a healthy diet and good sleep habits.
Laugh at least once a day. Re
member, laughter can sometimes be
the best medicine.
Space is provided throughout the
booklet to record information about
resources, questions for doctors, and
key facts about medical care,
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ForafreecoDVOfFacineForward:
A Guide for Cancer Survivors, call
1-800-4-CANCER.
3. Make time to talk and listen.
Allow feelings to be expressed, even
when they are difficult feelings.
4. Share responsibility for deci
sions that affect the family.
5. Maintain flexibility in who does
what in the family.
6. Try to anticipate changes that
will require your family to adapt.
Plan ways to cope before a crisis
occurs.
In Oregon, the agreement must be
in writing and signed by both parties.
It becomes effective upon marriage.
Since it's a legal document, the
logical person to draft it is an attor
ney, but one attorney should not
represent both partners.
The OSU Extension Service has
available a new publication that can
help couples understand what's fi
nancially involved in a second mar
riage. "Premarital Agreements" FS
3 1 8, is available without charge from
Publications Orders, Agricultural
Communications, OSU, Adminis
trative Services A422, Corvallis, OR
97331-2119
Don't forget to keep
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In the excitement of planning a
wedding and starting a new house
hold, it s easy to forget some im
portant financial and record keeping
tasks.
Alice Mills Morrow.Oregon State
University Extension family eco
nomics specialist, emphasizes that
"it important to pay attention to fi
nancial and record keeping details as
you begin this new phase of your life.
For instance, it's easy to forget that
your mother is the beneficiary of
your life insurance and not your new
spouse."
It's also important for the new
household to organize a family record
storage system. Some records can be
kept at home in a filing cabinet or
desk. Other should be stored in a safe
parents, don't take
are willing and able to rive.
Then, consider the impact on your
own family. It's important to talk with
your spouse and children about your
feelings, concerns and responsibilities
for your aging parent You need their
support
Another important step is listening
to your aging parent and observing
carefully so you can decide together
what the needs really are. Too often,
aging parents don'tcommunicate their
needs for fear of losing independence
or becoming a burden.
On the other hand, one of the easiest
mistakes for adult children to make is
to overreact Taking too much respon
sibility for an aging parent robs him or
her to that important feeling of inde
pendence. Also, be sure to involve your brothers
and sisters, if any, in the decision
making process, even if they live far
away. Sharing responsibilities with
them can prevent overload for you and
possible future undermining of the
decision that is made.
Once a plan is determined and set
into action it';s important to evaluate
its effectiveness. Is it meeting the needs
it was intended to meet? How are you
living expenses and pay all your
creditors, you face some difficult fi
nancial decisions.
When your income is reduced,
your spending habits must change.
The sooner you change, the more
likely your financial problems can
be lessened. Your family should be
part of the decision making process,
since their cooperation is essential to
carry out your plans.
Sizing Up Your Situation
When your bills exceed the money
to pay them, contact the people to
whom you owe money your credi
tors and explain your
situalion.Crcditors will usually work
with you to adjust your payments
because they want their money.
Before you can talk to your credi
tors, you need to take a hard look at
Relieving stress,
Losing your job is one of the most
stressful events a person can experi
ence. Unemployment can be per
sonally devastating and can trigger
the same reactions you might feel
during other serious crises, such as
divorce or the death of someone you
love.
While you arc unemployed you
may feel tense and angry. You may
have mood swings and find yourself
lashing out at others. You may expe
rience feelings of frustration that lead
to family arguments. Or you mav
feel depressed and discouraged.
These feelings arc normal and com
mon. Other family members usually
share some or all of the emotions of
the unemployed person; either di
rectly or indirectly. For instance, they
may share your same feelings of loss
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and despair, they may also have to
deal with your depression, frustration
nnd anper.
Allow yourself and other family
members to express their feelings.
Don't talk about "snapping out of it"
This denies the seriousness of
someone's feelings.
Losing a job forces you, against
your wishes, to make rapid changes
in your life. It can disrupt your habits
and normal routines and give you too
much tree ume. i ry to maintain your
Recipes sure to
Spicy French Toast
12 cup skim milk
2 eggs
3 Tbsp. sifted powdered sugar
12 tsp. ground cinnamon
14 tsp. ground cloves
12 tsp. vanilla
Vegetable cooking spray
4 slices of bread
Combine rnilk eggs, sugar, cin
namon, clove and vanilla in a shallow
bowl, beating well. Coat a large skillet
with cooking spray; place over me
dium heat until hot Dip 2 bread slices,
one at a time, into the egg mixture,
coating well. Drain off excess; ar
range bread slices in skillet, andcook
over medium heat 4 minutes on each
side or until lightly browned, remove
to a serving platter and keep warm.
Repeat with remaining bread slices.
Yield: 4 servings
financial records
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Henosit box or fire-Droof safe. The
system should include a place to keep
records, a routine for attending to
records and who is to be responsible
for record keeping.
Two OSU Extension publications
are available to help.
The first, "When You Many:
Some Financial and Recordkeeping
Tasks," FS 317, is available without
charge. The second, "Organizing
Your Family Records," EC 1302, is
available for 75 cents plus 50 cents
for postage and handling.
Both publications can be ordered
form Publications Orders, Agricul
tural Communication, OSU, Admin
istrative Services A422, Corvallis,
OR 97331-2119
on too much
being affected? Is your aging parent
happy 7 Flans may need to oe revised.
It's a mistake to think that making a
decision is a one-time task. Your needs
and abilities, and those of your parent
may change. There may be further
declines or perhaps a recovery from an
illness.
Of course, the main message is to be
prepared. A common error that adult
children and aging parents make is not
looking ahead to times when parents
may need assistance. It's a good idea to
talk with one another about possible
plans and desires for help before the
need exists.
There is more information in two
Extension publications dcalikng with
these issues. One is Aging Parents:
Helping When Health Fails, PNW 246,
which costs 50 cents, and the second is
Living Arrangements in Later Life,
PNW 318, which costs $1. Copies are
available through the Warm Springs,
Jefferson County Extension offices or
may be obtained by writing Publications
Orders, Agricultural Communications,
OSU, Administrative Services A422,
Corvallis, OR 97331-21197 Please
enclose 50 cents for shipping and
handling.
your situation and make some deci
sions about how much and when you
can pay. First, answer the following
questions.
How much income can you count
on each month?
How much money is needed to
cover your essential monthly living
expenses?
How many creditors do you owe
and what is the total amount you
owe?
How long is your present financial
situation likely to last?
What assets (savings, items that
could be sold) do vou have that could
be used to pay off your debt?
What debts we the Most important
to repay first?
What debts could be satisfied by
voluntarily surrendering, or giving
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daily routines and familiar habits as
much as you can. Try to fill your time
in satisfying and rewarding ways.
Another change is that you will
have more time with your family. On
the positive side, you can spend time
with your children, spouse or other
family members. You can work on
household projects that you haven't
had lime to do. You can read up on a
topic you've wanted to learn more
about.
Every member of the family feels
the stress of unemployment Support
and communicate with one another.
Some roles and responsibilities may
need to be changed until you find a
new job. Be flexible. Families who
meet challenges head-on are the most
likely to successfully cope with un
employment A young wife and mother talked
bitterly about her unemployed hus
band: "When I ask for help or tell
him I can't keep working all day and
come home to a filthy house, he tells
me I'm not turning him into a
housewife just because I have a job
and he doesn't
"Or he tells me he's not the maid,
or that he still wear the pants in our
family and I'd better remember it
Then he doesn't speak for days, or
apologizes 40 times or takes of f with
tempt, satisfy
Bran Muffins for Two
3 Tbsp. morsels of wheat bran
cereal
3 Tbsp. skim milk
' - 2 tsp. margarine, melted -
2 tsp. honey
3 Tbsp. all-purpose flour
12 tsp. baking powder
Dash salt.
Vegetable cooking spray
Combine cereal and milk in a small
bowl; stir well and let stand 2 minutes.
Add margarine and honey, stirring
until blended. Combine flour, baking
powder and salt in a small bowl. Add
to cereal mixture and stir just until
moistened. Spoon batter into 2 muffin
cups coated with cooking spray. Bake
at 400 for 20 minutes or until golden
brown. Yield: 2 muffins (132 calo
ries each)
VUVN MIV
expressing concerns necessary
por 4.H: Volunteer whatever time you have
. .
How much time will it require?
Two hours or one hundred hours
might be given. Any time you can
give will be helpful.
Why become a 4-H Leader? A
good4-H program develops a child's
confidence, pride, and leadership
ability. It promotes good work hab
its, useful skills, positive attitudes,
and the ability to work with others.
This very worthwhile youth program
cannot exist without volunteer lead
ers. Don't deny the youth of your
community the opportunity for such
growth and development.
Becoming a 4-H leader will bring
you self satisfaction. It will offer
opportunities for you to participate
with your neighbors and friends in
field trips, fairs, camp, achievements
programs, etc. And it will help you to
develop your own abilities.
What is 4-H? 4-H is a national,
state and local program sponsored by
the cooperative Extension Service.
The Reservation and County Agents
support and assist volunteer leaders.
One new approach called "Indianized
4-H" provides a great deal of local
flexibility. It offers an opportunity
for Indian people to conduct their
own 4-H program their own way.
4-H operates primarily through
community clubs. Each club has one
or more leaders. One might attend to
the organizational aspects of the club,
teach project skills or bom. Young
sters who have support and involve
ment from parents nave the best 4-H
experience. 4-H project booklets and
other useful printed materials are
provided, if requested, for both
members and leaders by the State
Extension Services. 4-H Club ac
tivities work but often also include a
business meeting and a fun period.
The 4-H program provides recog
nition for varied accomplishments.
It allows each young person to
achieve according to hisher ability
and interest
What will you need to do as a
leader? You will teach or help teach
Annual OSU tour set for March 23-25
You are invited to host a student or students from a f
foreign country in your home. The students, with their
advisors, win arrive in Warm Springs, Monday, March
23 and will depart Wednesday, March 25. Notify the
Warm Springs Extension Office at 553-3233 if you are
interested in hosting an OSU visitor.
his friends who cot laid off when he
did. I never know what he's going to
do but I know what he isn t going
to do. He isn't going to pay attention
to the kids, start dinner, do the gro
cery shopping or even empty an ash
tray." Change can be difficult but all
family members need to pull together
during a crisis such as unemployment
All family members, especially
children, fare better where parents
support each other.
In order to better cope with stress,
keep your body healthy. Eat balanced
meals, get enough sleep and exercise
regularly.
One approach to cope with stress
overload is to take a break from the
stressful situation. Here are some
suggestions:
Take a walk.
Watch a movie.
even the most finicky of eaters
Chicken Fajltas
2 lbs. boneless chicken breast
halves, skinned
14 cup white wine vinegar
" 144 cup lime juice
2 Tbsp. Worcestershire sauce
2 Tbsp. chopped onion
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp dried whole oregano
14 tsp. ground cumin
Vegetable cooking spray
8 (8-inch) flour tortillas
12 cup commercial picante sauce,
divided
12 cup plain low-fat yogurt, di
vided 14 cup choppeed green chiles,
divided
Trim excess fat from chicken.
Place chicken between two sheets of
waxed paper and flatten to 14-inch
a skill to a group of young people
who will meet weekly, or Di-weewy.
For as long as you and your 4-H club
want to meet, as long as the youth
want to meet or until they have
learned the skill they joined the 4-H
club to learn. You as the leader will
set the time, date and location of your
4-H club.
What help will you get? Extension
Agents, Aides or experienced lead
ers will provide you with the neces
sary printed materials and they will
help you until you are ready to work
on your own.
You may want to follow the ac
tivities outline in the project or leader
manuals or you may want to do your
own thing.
Sometimes funds to offset certain
projects and events costs are provided
by the OSU Office. In other cases 4
H clubs have to raise their own
The more you know, the more you...
The more you know about the 4-H
program the more you can help your
child. You will find out about 4-H by
being involved, especially by attend
ing meetings and 4-H events.
Help your child select a project
that heshe will like, one that he will
have the ability to do and one for
which you can furnish the needed
materials.
Show a personal interest in the
project your child selects. Learn about
your child's project so that you can
give help when it is needed. Cooper
ate with your child and encourage
himher in carrying on a 4-H project
without actually doing the job your
self. Encourage your child to com
plete whatever is started.
Support 4-H activities. For inter
est and enthusiasm, attend 4-H func
tions as a family. Volunteer to furnish
transportation to some 4-H activities.
Provide your child with whatever
inexpensive projects supplies that
I
Information provided by:
Warm Springs OSU
Extension Office
1131 Paiute Street
553-3238
during job loss
Soend time on yourself take a
long bubble bath or shower.
Listen to music.
Work in the yard or garden.
Work on your favorite hobby or
start one.
Jog, dance or participate in some
other physical activity.
Another approach is to take action
to reduce excess muscle tension by
using relaxation exercises. Although
relaxation exercises do not gel at
causes of stress overload, they pro
vide a physical release from tension.
Learning to achieve the relaxation
response is a skill that takes practice.
Practice the technique at least twice
a day. Follow these guidelines:
Find a quiet place.
Get into a comfortable position
lie down on the floor or sit with
uncrossed legs.
Breathe easily and naturally.
Keep muscles loose and relaxed.
thickness, using a meat mallet or
rolling pin. Place chicken in a 13x9x2
inch baking dish. Combine vinegar,
lime juice, Worcestershire sauce,
onion, garlic, oregano and cumin,
pour over chicken. Cover and refrig
erate at least four hours. Remove
chicken and discard marinade. Ar
range chicken on a grill coated with
cooking spray. Grill 6 inches from
heat source (about 8 minutes), turn
ing once. Slice chicken across the
grain into 12-inch wide strips. Wrap
tortillas in aluminum foil; bake at
325 for IS minutes. Arrange strips of
chicken just off center of each torti
lla; roll up tortillas. Top each with
one tablespoon picante sauce, one
tablespoon yogurt and 1 12 teaspoons
green chiles. Yield 8 servings (308
calories per serving).
money. Parents often provide projects
materials, some iranspunauuu oiiu
refreshments.
Can someone like me really help?
Definitely! Anyone who likes chil
dren or who has a special interest or
skill, or a strong desire to pass on
their Indian culture and skills to the
younger youth of Warm Springs.
Volunteers are needed now. Call
the OSU Extension office here in
Warm Springs, Oregon 553-3238.
Leaders meet
4-H Leaders meetings are held
monthly. Leaders are encouraged to
bring their sack lunches to the noon
meetings. The next meeting will be
March 2. All meetings are held in the
4-H Room in the basement of the old
boys dorm.
may be needed.
Show appreciation to local 4-H
leaders. They gave their time and
talents to your children to provide
them with opportunities they might
not otherwise have.
Develop a sense of purpose. A
parent should encourage their child
to participate in a 4-H club for learn
ing experience, not for prizes and
awards that may be available, and
not for the fun alone.
Offer your services. Share your
knowledge, special skills and hob
bies with a 4-H group. The leaders
will appreciate your help. Also you
may offer to help with transportation
or to host a club meeting or event, if
you are able.
Give encouragement and ap
proval. These are two of the basic
needs of young people. Encourage
your 4-H member to participate in
his personal project and club activi
ties. Show approval for job well done.