A10 COFFEE BREAK East Oregonian Saturday, November 20, 2021 DEAR ABBY Substance abuse pits family members against each other Dear Abby: I’m a 35-year-old woman whose father refuses to get along with me no matter how hard I try. Our relationship was always strained due to the alcoholism he has struggled with since my childhood, made worse by the fact that I became an addict. I’ve been in recovery for a while, and I’m clean and sober now. He and my mother took guardianship of my two sons, ages 12 and 7, because my disease rendered me unable to care for them at that time. I have mentioned getting my kids back after I acquire more clean time; neither of my parents wants that. I know Dad resents me deeply, both because he has my kids and also because of my addiction. If I can forgive him for what his alco- holism has put me through, why can’t he forgive me? I don’t understand why he has to hate me. Believe me, he hates me! I just want him to treat me the same way he accumulated more clean time, regaining treats my older brother and sister. I need custody of your children may become a help with this situation. Counsel- viable option, and something to ing is not an option; I know he will discuss with a lawyer at that time. refuse. — Hurting In Michigan Dear Abby: My wife has Dear Hurting: A predisposi- star ted slur ping her food at tion to addiction can run in fami- dinner. I think it started after we lies. I suspect that the person your returned from a vacation three father hates is himself, and that he months ago. I’m convinced she saw a lot of himself in you while didn’t do it before then because we have taken a couple of vaca- you were using. That you are now JEANNE sober is a constant reminder of tions recently where it would PHILLIPS what a failure he is, which may be have been noticeable because of ADVICE why he treats you the way he does. the quiet, intimate places in which While counseling for him may we dined. be out, it doesn’t mean that you Because of the COVID quaran- couldn’t benefit from it. Please consider tine, I realize that tensions can be height- it. Although it won’t make your father love ened, and I have tried not to make too much you, it may help you to handle his unpleas- of this. I am reluctant to speak up about it antness more effectively. Once you have because during my first marriage, even the slightest noise when eating would upset my ex-wife, and I think it would be unfair for me to have the same pet peeve. This may seem like I’m overly sensi- tive, but her slurping and heavy breathing every time she takes a bite, even with dry food, is making dinner time uncomfort- able for me. I have pointed it out in a casual way, but it seems she is unaware of just how loudly she is eating. What can I do to reach a compromise on this? — Uncom- fortable Diner Dear Diner: While your sensitivity to this might be related to the problems you had with your first wife, because this is a recent change in your current wife’s behav- ior, it should be checked out by her doctor. I am less concerned about her “slurp- ing” than about the labored breathing you described when your wife is eating. DAYS GONE BY 100 years ago — 1921 Many thousands of dollars of damage has been incurred in Umatilla county as a result of the heaviest November snow storm that has fallen in this section of the state during the past 25 years. After about 55 hours of continuous storm two feet of snow covered groaning buildings, broke telephone and telegraph wires, impeded street traffi c, almost completely blocked rail traffi c and caused the collapse of some roofs. The Happy Canyon pavilion proved the fi rst storm casualty in Pendleton when the roof caved in under the weight of the snow. As a result the entire pavilion is a wreck, the roof having fallen in upon the dance fl oor and the walls being damaged by the cave-in. 50 years ago — 1971 In Arlington these days, the Honkers are the prime topic of conversation. The Honkers are the members of Arling- ton’s high school football team which will meet Huntington Saturday afternoon in the semifi nals of the Oregon Class A Eight-Man football playoff s. Eighty-nine-year-old Minnie McClaskey, sporting a recently purchased $10 Honker boost- ers jacket, says she is hoping to get a ride to the game. The prospects of winning a state crown was a major topic of busi- ness in the month’s city council meeting and Wednesday’s chamber of commerce luncheon. Mayor and chamber pres- ident Foster Odom was checking out possible bus transpor- tation for adults in the community. As for city recorder Bud Allen, he said, “I’m going to Huntington if I don’t break a leg before then.” 25 years ago — 1996 Hunting has long been a way of life for many in northeast Oregon. But that doesn’t mean the sport is free of discord locally. The Oregon Department of Fish and Wildlife added a portion of the Ukiah big game management unit to the Colum- bia Basin extended elk season this year. That move fostered controversy among some biologists who say the month-long either-sex hunt is too broad, and complaints from some hunt- ers who are confused by boundaries and requirements. The Columbia Basin extended season has been in place for several years and the last two years have included the Columbia Basin Unit and part of the Biggs Unit, stretching east to the John Day River. A portion of the Ukiah Unit was added this year to address the build-up of the resident elk herd in the McKay Creek drainage. Because part of the hunt boundary doesn’t follow a natural or man-made feature, like a road, some hunt- ers end up on the wrong side and have been cited by State Police. THIS DAY IN HISTORY On Nov. 20, 1945, 22 former Nazi officials went on trial before an interna- tional war crimes tribunal in Nuremberg, Germany. (Almost a year later, the Inter- national Military Tribune sentenced 12 of the defen- dants to death; seven received prison sentences ranging from 10 years to life; three were acquitted.) In 1789, New Jersey became the fi rst state to ratify the Bill of Rights. In 1947, Britain’s future queen, Princess Elizabeth, married Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, at Westminster Abbey. In 1952, President-elect Dwight D. Eisenhower announced his selection of John Foster Dulles to be his secretary of state. In 1962, President John F. Kennedy held a news confer- ence in which he announced the end of the naval quarantine of Cuba imposed during the missile crisis, and the signing of an executive order prohib- iting discrimination in federal housing facilities. In 1967, the U.S. Census Bureau’s Population Clock at the Commerce Department ticked past 200 million. In 1976, the boxing drama “Rocky,” starring Sylvester Stallone, premiered in New York. In 1984, pop star Michael Jackson was inducted into the Hollywood Walk of Fame with the unveiling of his star in front of a horde of scream- ing fans. In 1985, the fi rst version of Microsoft’s Windows operat- ing system, Windows 1.0, was offi cially released. In 2000, lawyers for Al Gore and George W. Bush battled before the Florida Supreme Court over whether the presidential election recount should be allowed to continue. In 2003, Michael Jack- son was booked on suspicion of child molestation in Santa Barbara, California. (Jackson was later acquitted at trial.) Record producer Phil Spector was charged with murder in the shooting death of an actor, Lana Clarkson, at his home in Alhambra, California. (Spec- tor’s fi rst trial ended with a hung jury in 2007; he was convicted of second-degree murder in 2009 and sentenced to 19 years to life in prison. He died in January 2021.) In 2012, former boxing champion Hector “Macho” Camacho was shot while sitting in a car in his home- town of Bayamon, Puerto Rico. (Camacho died four days later after doctors removed him from life support.) In 2015, Jonathan Pollard, a former U.S. Navy intelli- gence analyst, was released from prison after 30 years behind bars for spying for Israel. (After five years of parole, Pollard moved to Israel in December 2020.) Today’s Birthdays: Actor Estelle Parsons is 94. Comedian Dick Smothers is 83. President Joe Biden is 79. Singer Norman Greenbaum is 79. Actor Veron- ica Hamel is 78. Broadcast journalist Judy Woodruff is 75. Singer Joe Walsh is 74. Actor Richard Masur is 73. Opera singer Barbara Hendricks is 73. Former national secu- rity adviser John Bolton is 73. Actor Bo Derek is 65. Former NFL player Mark Gastin- eau is 65. Reggae musician Jimmy Brown (UB40) is 64. Actor Sean Young is 62. Pianist Jim Brickman is 60. Actor Ming-Na is 58. Actor Ned Vaughn is 57. Rapper Mike D (The Beastie Boys) is 56. Rapper Sen Dog (Cypress Hill) is 56. Actor Callie Thorne is 52. Actor Sabrina Lloyd is 51. Actor Joel McHale is 50. Actor Marisa Ryan is 47. Country singer Dierks Bentley is 46. Actor Joshua Gomez is 46. Actor Laura Harris is 45. Olympic gold medal gymnast Dominique Dawes is 45. Country singer Josh Turner is 44. Actor Nadine Velazquez is 43. Actor Jacob Pitts is 42. Actor Andrea Riseborough is 40. Actor Jeremy Jordan is 37. Actor Dan Byrd is 36. Actor Ashley Fink is 35. Rock musi- cian Jared Followill (Kings of Leon) is 35. VISIT US ON THE WEB AT: www.EastOregonian.com CHURCH DIRECTORY Solid Rock Community Church 140 SW 2nd St Hermiston, OR 97838 541-567-6937 Worship Service: 11:00AM Sunday School: 9:45 Pastor Wilbur Clark Community Presbyterian Church 14 Martin Drive, Umatilla, OR 922-3250 Worship: 10 AM Sunday School at 11:30 First Christian Church OPEN HEARTS – OPEN DOOR www.graceandmercylutheran.org Sunday Worship 8:45 a.m. Sunday School 10:00 a.m. (Nursery Provided) Fellowship, Refreshments & Sunday School Check Out our Facebook Page or Website for More Information 541-289-4535 Pastor Weston Walker Grace and Mercy Lutheran Church, ELCA (First United Methodist Church) 191 E. Gladys Ave. / P.O. Box 1108 Hermiston, Oregon 97838 The Salvation Army COME WORSHIP WITH US AT THE COUNTRY CHURCH 215 N. Main • Pendleton 10:30 - Worship Service Sundays at 11:00am In Person worship Sundays at 11:00am 5:30 Family Fellowship Meal • 6:00 Bible Study 32742 Diagonal Rd. Hermiston, OR Office Phone: 541-276-5358 Hours: M-F 9:00am-1:00pm PENDLETON LIGHTHOUSE CHURCH Sunday Service: 9am & 6pm Tuesday Kingdom Seekers: 7pm Wednesday Bible Study: 7pm We offer: Sunday School • Sign Language Interpreters • Nursery • Transportation • & more! Pastor Dan Satterwhite 541.377.4252 417 NW 21st St. • Pendleton, OR 97801 www.facebook.com/ PendletonLighthouseChurch (DISCIPLES OF CHRIST) Center for Worship & Service Sunday Worship Service 9:30 - Sunday School Wednesday Bible Study COME AS YOU ARE 150 SE Emigrant (541) 276-3369 St. Johns Episcopal Church Our Lady of Angels Catholic Church 565 W. HERMISTON AVE. Iglesia Católica Nuestra Señora de los Ángeles 565 W. HERMISTON AVE. N.E. Gladys Join Ave & Us 7th, Hermiston 541-567-6672 JOIN OUR INCLUSIVE CONGREGATION ON OUR JOURNEY WITH JESUS Services 9:00am Sundays In-person or streaming on Facebook or Zoom FAITH LUTHERAN CHURCH in Mission for Christ LCMC Sunday Worship.........9:00 AM Bible Study......10:15 AM Red Lion Hotel ( Oregon Trail Room ) Redeemer Episcopal Church 241 SE Second St. Pendleton (541)276-3809 www.pendletonepiscopal.org PendletonPresbyterian.com Sunday Holy Communion: 9am Wednesday Holy Communion: Noon M-F Morning Prayer 7am on Zoom Worship Services On Facebook 10:00am Sundays All Are Welcome 201 SW Dorion Ave. Facebook.com/PendletonPresbyterian To advertise in the Church Directory, please contact Audra Workman 541-564-4538 or email aworkman@eastoregonian.com