COFFEE BREAK
Saturday, May 25, 2019
East Oregonian
C5
DEAR ABBY
Family won’t stop reminding of failed marriage
Dear Abby: I married when I was in
of myself and have made only positive
my early 20s and stayed mar-
changes since my divorce.
ried for four years. It has been
I have told my family I
five years since my divorce.
don’t appreciate their con-
stantly bringing up my failed
We had no children, and I
marriage and my sister’s wed-
haven’t had contact with my
ding all the time, but they con-
ex. The problem is, my fam-
tinue to do so. They say they
ily won’t stop bringing him
don’t understand why it both-
up. My sister is being married
ers me. Am I overreacting?
soon, so they constantly dis-
cuss my wedding.
How do I establish bound-
J eanne
aries with them about this?
I didn’t live near my fam-
P hilliPs
ily before the divorce, so they
As of now, I’m spending less
ADVICE
don’t know how bad my mar-
time with them in order to stay
riage really was. I didn’t tell
focused on my life goals. —
them because I don’t think it’s their
Keeping the Past in the Past
business. They didn’t like him, but they
Dear Keeping: You shouldn’t blame
don’t know all of my reasons for get-
your relatives for something they don’t
ting divorced. I have moved on with my
know — specifically, the fact that your
life.
marriage was much worse than they
I recently moved back to be near my
realize. This is wedding season, your
family, which I regret now because they
sister’s nuptials are fast approaching,
can’t let go of my past. I have changed
and it’s only natural that the subject of
a lot in the time that I lived away from
weddings — present, future and past
them. I worked my way through college
— comes up. Remind them that your
and dealt with a genetic, life-threatening
marriage is a sensitive subject. If they
health issue (hospital stays included),
don’t stop bringing it up after that, then
all without their support. Since then, I
continue to distance yourself.
have focused on my career, my health,
Dear Abby: After many years of
self-care and my happiness. I’m proud
much silence, backstabbing and abuse
from my sister, I got a text from her
telling me she’s starting chemo for
a form of leukemia. This has been
going on for more than four years, but
she thought now I should be “in the
loop.”
I told her I will be praying for her. I
had to hold back the emotional, “What
can I do for you?” She lives about five
hours away, but knowing my siblings,
I know they’ll be hanging around and
judging me on what I do next. I told
her I am in shock right now.
I have very mixed emotions about
how to handle this news — from trust
issues to guilt to pain. We are both in
our mid-60s. Any advice would be
helpful. — Lost Sis
Dear Lost Sis: Start by doing what
you said you would — praying for her.
A few days — or weeks — after her
treatment has started, call to see how
she is doing. If the call goes well, con-
tinue to check in on her. If she wants
you to come, put aside your differ-
ences and pay her a visit. If the call
doesn’t go well, don’t put yourself in
that position again, and do not apolo-
gize or feel guilty for doing it. Forgive
her and forgive yourself.
DAYS GONE BY
100 Years Ago
From the East Oregonian
May 25-26, 1919
Within three hours of his mother’s visit to him Sunday morn-
ing, Charles Conners, a prisoner at the county jail, had sawed his
way to freedom through the bars and escaped. With him went
Manuel Herera, who was captured an hour later a mile east of
town along the railroad. Conners is still at large. Two weeks ago,
Conners, a young fellow with a convict record since his sixteenth
year, was arrested for attempting to obtain money under false pre-
tenses. He has been in jail since. On Friday his mother came here
from Baker and had been permitted to talk to her son each day.
50 Years Ago
From the East Oregonian
May 25-26, 1969
Westland Estates, a subdivision covering over 500 acres, is in
the early stage of development three miles southwest of Hermis-
ton in the Westland district. The subdivision, plotted for approx-
imately 108 lots of 1¼ acre, is located between Powerline and
Agnew roads. The developer is Howard S. Gass, Portland, vet-
eran developer. Construction is under way on two of the model
homes on Agnew Road, and their completion is expected within
30 days.
25 Years Ago
From the East Oregonian
May 25-26, 1994
Pendleton powerlifter Ross Phillips set an American Power-
lifting Federation world record in the squat by lifting 491 pounds
at the National Masters competition in Nashville, Tenn., Satur-
day. Phillips, lifting in the 181-pound, 61-64 age group, totaled
1,216 pounds at the competition. He bench pressed 240 points on
his first life, but missed his next two lifts. He lifted 485 pounds on
his first deadlift and then tore a muscle in his bicep on an attempt
at 510 pounds, said his son, Pendleton powerlifter Greg Phillips.
Ross Phillips is scheduled to lift at the world championships in
Ohio in November.
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
On May 25, 1935, Babe
Ruth hit his last three career
home runs — Nos. 712, 713
and 714 — for the Boston
Braves in a game against
the Pittsburgh Pirates. (The
Pirates won, 11-7.)
In 1787, the Constitu-
tional Convention began
at the Pennsylvania State
House (Independence Hall)
in Philadelphia after enough
delegates had shown up for
a quorum.
In 1895, playwright
Oscar Wilde was convicted
of a morals charge in Lon-
don; he was sentenced to
two years in prison.
In 1961, President John F.
Kennedy told Congress: “I
believe that this nation should
commit itself to achieving
the goal, before this decade
is out, of landing a man on
the moon and returning him
safely to the earth.”
Thought for Today: “I
hate quotations. Tell me what
you know.” — Ralph Waldo
Emerson, American essayist
and poet (1803-1882).
Universal Crossword
Edited by David Steinberg May 25, 2019
ACROSS
1 Brazilian dance
6 Shoot the breeze
9 Signal to pull over
14 Zones
15 Zenith rival
16 Fed. security
17 Estate crafter?
19 Bend one’s ___ (have
a drink)
20 Former New York
governor Mario
21 “Band of Brothers”
conflict, briefly
22 Not out
25 Cheer-leader’s
syllable
27 Extremities
30 Next available
32 Asylum seeker
34 Sacred
35 “Skyfall” singer
37 “___ Got a Secret”
38 Everybody
39 Wish that a short
hairdo looks good?
41 Beaujolais, e.g.
42 Word of possibility
43 “Never ___ moment”
44 Wasabi snacks
45 Fuel additive
47 Falcons’ home
50 ___ ex machina
51 Hit head-on
53 Singer of the 2018 No.
1 hit “Without Me”
54 Bites like a puppy
56 Having a high BMI
58 Sacrifice site
60 Windy weather front?
64 Lengthy attack
65 Number of Q’s in
Scrabble
66 Additional
67 Razor sharpener
68 Pops
69 Finals’ preceders, in a
tourney
DOWN
1 Word with “band” or
“hand”
2 Shapiro of NPR
3 Funnyman Brooks
4 Where Juliet says, “O
Romeo, Romeo!”
5 Take for granted
6 Gloomy
7 Play group member?
8 Scrooge’s cry
9 Fret
10 Taking the place (of)
11 Known facts about a
redbreast?
12 Ike’s command in
21-Across
13 Just out
18 Homer’s hangout
21 Puppy
22 Red-faced
23 “You missed it”
24 One searching for
yuletide greenery?
“IN NAME ONLY” By Gary Larson
sudoku answers
26
28
29
31
33
36
39
40
44
46
48
49
52
55
57
58
59
60
61
62
63
Anatomical ring
Go off course
Talking toy since 1965
___ rasa
Service charge
UPS competitor
Prohibit
Locker room woes
Paint-mixing site
Pungent cheese
Biblical pronoun
Snares, as a calf
2016 Disney hit
Kind of school
Drained financially
Long-eared beast
Like an awesome
party
Pantheon member
Resistance unit
Outdoor retailer
___ White (former
Clue character)