VIEWPOINTS
Saturday, March 10, 2018
East Oregonian
Page 5A
The necessity of vulnerability
I
’ve been thinking about vulnerability. So
have you, I’m sure. The cover story in
last Saturday’s East Oregonian showed
a barred security gate at Pendleton High
School and included words like “fortress”
and “securing the perimeter.”
PHS students and teachers are
planning a march to say they
are tired of feeling vulnerable
to school shootings, even
as others argue against
restrictions on firearms,
insisting that guns make us
less vulnerable. Arm the
teachers.
The one thing we agree on
is that we don’t want to feel
vulnerable. To a great extent,
that’s what the #MeToo
movement is about: women,
and men too, saying no. No
more.
Yet there I was last
week, joining students
and community members
who had gathered in a
BMCC classroom for a conversation about
creativity, vulnerability, and art. “What We
Risk,” slam poet Jason Graham had titled his
Oregon Humanities Conversation Project.
We were there to share ideas about another
kind of vulnerability. The necessary kind.
The kind that makes us human.
Not everyone takes the risks a creative
artist takes — opening herself to criticism or
misunderstanding, rejection, ridicule — in
some places, imprisonment or death — but
anyone who has held his child in his arms
knows what it means to accept vulnerability.
Opening our hearts to a partner means
knowing we will have to face the eventual
loss of that person.
And — dogs. Do we do
that for practice, I sometimes
wonder? Devastated as we
are when the dog dies, as
they all do, we get another
puppy. Or we head to PAWS,
pretending that we’re rescuing
a dog instead of being rescued
ourselves.
To come to the First Draft
Writers’ Series is to accept
this necessary kind of human
vulnerability. You don’t have
to be a featured writer or share
at the open mic to experience
it. All you have to do is listen.
Sometimes the writer’s
willingness to accept risk is
obvious. “It’s been six years
since Jennie died,” we heard
the Osage writer Ruby Hanson Murray’s
soft, steady voice reading last month, “and
I’ve barely spoken about her death. I’m
sharing my experience because I hope if we
lighten the judgment and shame some people
associate with domestic violence, overdose,
or suicide, we can help each other.” Her
fellow writer Dawn Pichon Barron was
fearless, too; her chapbook Escape Girl
Blues took us “under the bridge where we
The kind of
vulnerability
that makes
us human is
what kept
me in the
classroom all
those years.
The Second Amendment’s
misplaced comma
L
et me be clear. I like guns. I’ve
bleeding and some bullet fragments.
owned several. Including the
I was looking at a CT scan of
.22 caliber single shot rifle
one of the victims of the shooting
my father gave to me when I was
at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High
about ten. Trouble was I couldn’t hit
School, who had been brought to the
the broad side of a barn. However,
trauma center during my call shift.
one day I was down in our pasture
The liver looked like an overripe
and tried to kill a crow. But I soon
melon smashed by a sledgehammer,
learned that I could hit the living
with extensive bleeding. How could
Tom
room wall of our neighbor. Never
a gunshot wound have caused this
Hebert
saw the rifle again. And I have never
much damage?”
Comment
The president and Congress
had a defensive use for a gun. At
should not deliberately overlook
best I would shoot myself in the
the fact that the use of AR-15 rifles is
foot.
the common denominator in many mass
But, during my service with USO in
shootings.
Vietnam I inherited from some departing
Yet, the National Rifle Association has
Marines an AR-15 semi-automatic rifle (the
labeled the AR-15 “America’s most popular
murder weapon in the Parkland school) and
rifle.” Yeah, right. Some facts from the
an awesome Russian AK-47 Kalashnikov
Center for Disease Control and Prevention:
assault rifle. I never fired either one.
Since 1968 more than 1.5 million
I also had the opportunity to stare
Americans have been killed in the U.S.
down the muzzle of .45 caliber Thompson
submachine gun (a Tommy gun). It had been in gun-related incidents. In one year on
leveled at my chest by an angry Marine who average, more than 100,000 people in
America are shot in murders, assaults,
demanded that I sell him another hot dog or
suicides and suicide attempts, accidents, or
else he would shoot me. I was in this pickle
by police intervention.
because we had a snack bar rule that limited
And in one year on average more than
each Marine to two hot dogs. I had imposed
18,000 American children and teens (ages
this rule because we received a limited
0-19) are also shot in murders, assaults,
number of hot buns every morning from a
suicides and suicide attempts, accidents, or
Navy bakery and so, following the rules, a
by police intervention.
Vietnamese employee had refused to sell
But, thank the Lord, we have those
him another one.
intelligent and savvy students from Marjory
After his threat, I told the off-kilter
Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland,
Marine that if he killed me the Marines
standing in line behind him would shoot
Florida, to show us the way forward.
him dead. Appreciating the reality of this he
But, we adults will all have to come
walked out the door.
to terms with the fact that the Second
I also owned a Ruger .38 caliber snub-
Amendment—which the NRA has
nosed revolver. During the Tet Offensive
enshrined—is all about a misplaced comma.
of 1966 I was living in an apartment in
Congress ratified the Amendment
Saigon. One night I heard some gunfire so
on December 15, 1791. The first 10
I ran upstairs to the roof. Suddenly I was
amendments form the Bill of Rights. The
being shot at from two directions — a North Second Amendment reads: “A well regulated
Vietnamese sniper and a Marine sniper in a
militia, being necessary to the security of a
nearby hotel where some Marines lived.
free state, the right of the people to keep and
So, I did what any manly man would
bear arms, shall not be infringed.”
do. I ran back down the stairs and into my
But most Constitutional scholars agree
bedroom. But not before I grabbed a bottle
that it has nothing to do with an individual’s
of cognac and my Ruger. There I slept the
right to bear arms. It’s really about well-
night away clutching both. A month later I
regulated militias like the National Guard up
traded the worthless Ruger for 20 sheets of
at the Pendleton Airport. Because in 1791,
plywood. I still have the bullet the NVA had
the federal government couldn’t afford to
shot at me, which hit the stairwell.
maintain a standing army to protect all 13
In 1966 an officer of the 1st Marine
states so our founders encouraged local
Division had already told me how much
riflemen to form into well-regulated militias.
damage just one of those bullets could wreak
What the founders’ use of commas
on a human body.
reveals was what they really meant to say
A Florida radiologist wrote about his
was “Because a well-regulated militia being
experience with AR-15 killings in the
necessary to the security of a free state, the
February 22 Atlantic magazine’s website:
rights of the people to keep and bear arms
“In a typical handgun injury that I diagnose
shall not be infringed.”
almost daily, a bullet leaves a laceration
So, Google away.
through an organ like the liver. To a
■
radiologist, it appears as a linear, thin, gray
Tom Hebert is a writer and public policy
bullet track through the organ. There may be consultant living outside Pendleton.
hide … nowhere to go but the river.”
Often the risk isn’t so obvious. But
the thing all writers risk, and their readers
and listeners risk too, is the possibility of
connection. We are like Walt Whitman’s
“noiseless patient spider” casting our
fragile filament into the universe hoping the
gossamer thread will “catch somewhere.” It
might not. But when it does, when you hear
a poem that says exactly how you feel but
couldn’t have put into words — didn’t know
anyone could — well, there it is, that shiver
of human recognition.
And you never know when you’ll hear
it. High school students reading from their
phones can open doors you didn’t know
were there. One night an open mic reader
sang a poem about domestic abuse — a
combination no one expected — that stunned
everyone in the room.
“We talk about the vulnerability of
sharing our work publicly,” photographer
John Paul Caponigro acknowledged. I
don’t think we talk enough about the real
vulnerability involved in making art; if we
truly engage the process we are changed by
it.” As a writer, of course, I agree with him.
I think what he said is true for readers, too,
and for those of us who are fortunate enough
to get to hear writers read directly to us.
This belief in the kind of vulnerability
that makes us human is what kept me in the
classroom all those years, helping people
connect with stories and learn to tell their
own.
And now? What stories will we tell
B ette H usted
FROM HERE TO ANYWHERE
as our children practice hiding in their
school classroom closets? It’s an important
question. And it’s a reason artists know they
must risk everything.
■
Bette Husted is a writer and a student of
T’ai Chi and the natural world. She lives in
Pendleton.
Feeling seedy
as spring approaches
A
s the newest crop of seed
peas are for the frolicking kids to
catalogs arrives in the mail,
eat, while the grownups appreciate
my thoughts turn to next
the basil, radicchio and cucumbers.
summer’s garden and to the words
All of these can be ordered from a
of Tim Cahill, the adventure writer:
seed catalog and planted directly
“I am a man who sits around at
without having to be grown
home reading wilderness survival
inside. Climbing plants like beans
books the way some people peruse
should also be ordered, as well as
seed catalogs or accounts of classic
plants for them to climb on, like
Ari
chess games,” Cahill wrote in
sunflowers. As soon as the ground
LeVaux
“Jaguars Ripped My Flesh.”
can be worked, plant a handful
Comment
As a compulsive peruser of
of peas and beans. When they
seed catalogs, I think it’s a fair
come up, plant the rest, and your
comparison. All three of these pursuits
sunflowers among them.
can occur in one’s socks or slippers, over
I recommend a large bag of basil,
to be seeded in every blank spot in the
a cup of tea. They all invoke issues of
survival, but gardening requires the most
garden. They can be the exception that gets
integrated of skill sets, combining the
started indoors, and they are much more
strategy and foresight of a chess master
forgiving than tomatoes are. Or you can
with the survivalist’s intimate knowledge of sow the seeds outside around the time you
landscape and the ability to adjust on the fly transplant tomatoes. For me, that’s about
to changing conditions.
Memorial Day.
Growing a garden is a glorious way of
Those who take the time to fill their
dancing with the forces of nature, with the
freezers with ready-to-go foods can enjoy
bees and the flowers and the butterflies,
meals in winter that practically qualify
while eating and sniffing and generally
as fast food. In fact, there was a meal I
digging the scene.
used to cook in college that made me a
It’s a place for whimsy and relaxation,
minor celebrity on the dorm block that
though it’s important to be clear about
year. I called it PastaPestoPrego, and it
expectations — especially now, when you
leveraged the fact that one needn’t choose
have a bunch of seed catalogs spread out
between pesto and red sauce, as they go
before you.
great together. On top of that, this recipe
One easy rule of thumb is to rule out
manages to push most any button that a
any plants that need to be planted inside
20-year-old guy might possess, delivering
and in pots. I don’t care if you have a
noodles, cheese and quantity.
sunny windowsill. Unless you have a real
But it wasn’t just the satisfaction it
grow space and the proper gear, growing
delivered that made the meal legendary.
your own starts is a losing proposition.
It was the sheer speed with which I could
Unless you really know what you are
prepare it. And if the proverbial pesto and
doing, your tomato seedlings will probably Prego are in place at your place, you can
be an embarrassment compared to the
too:
greenhouse-grown beauties you can
PastaPestoPrego
purchase at the farmers market.
Big pot of boiling water
I’ve got a small stable of growers from
Half an onion, minced
whom I buy tomato plants, farmers who
Two garlic cloves, pressed, grated or
grow big specimens of interesting varieties
minced
that produce delicious, eclectic crops
Red sauce
through the summer. These are not the
Pesto
tomatoes with which I make the sauce that
Cheese, such as Parmesan or Romano
fills my freezer. Those tomatoes I’ll buy
Ground meat (optional)
months later, also at the farmers market.
When the noodles are done to your
Because my garden isn’t for filling the
liking, drain them and toss with olive oil,
freezer. It’s a net for catching some fleeting, and then minced garlic. This, right here, is
lovely moments of summer.
the most important trick you need to know
While students of chess and wilderness
about pasta: The garlic will cook in the hot
survival look to history for guidance,
noodles and the house will smell amazing.
readers of seed catalogs tend to look
Then stir in the cheese and pesto. Finally,
forward, focused on what is new. Pineapple toss in the red sauce. Add more grated
strawberries? Sure. Or we seek out things
cheese, if you can, and proceed to eat until
that are less available on the open market,
it hurts.
■
like radicchio.
Ari LeVaux is a contributor to Writers
The only thing I grow in large enough
on the Range, the opinion service of High
quantities to store and replant is garlic.
Country News (hcn.org). He writes about
The rest of the garden, I plant to eat. The
blueberries, raspberries, strawberries and
food and food politics in New Mexico.