Saturday, November 21, 2015
COFFEE BREAK
PARENTS TALK BACK
East Oregonian
Page 9C
OUT OF THE VAULT
Parenting Ambitious doctor stirs up Pendleton politics
through D
the pain
Editor’s note: Aisha Sultan is away
this week. This column originally
appeared on Sept. 4, 2010.
girlfriend gave birth last week
to a healthy, 9-pound baby
boy. In the process of getting
an epidural to numb the pain of labor,
she ended up with such excruciating
spinal headaches that she was unable
to rise from her bed to care for her
newborn.
The chances of this
happening — namely,
leakage of spinal
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resulting in severe
headaches — are only
about 1 in 200. But
when you are the one
suffering, statistics
Aisha
are irrelevant.
Sultan
She said she cried,
Parents talk back
she prayed, she
bargained with God
to relieve the blinding headaches. She
had moments when she wondered
if she would survive if the pain
continued.
Certainly, pain is unavoidable in
our lives. It comes in a rainbow of
forms: emotional, like the anguish
accompanying grief or the ache of
loss and sadness; and physical, which
can be latent and chronic, or acute
and debilitating.
The worst pain can render us
helpless and force us into submission.
My pain is in my gut, and it comes
in crashing waves. Fortunately, the
pain does not appear very often; for
the most part, I control it with diet
and medication. But when it does hit,
it can be paralyzing: keeping me up
at night, making my hands shake. I
focus on breathing until each tidal
wave passes. It can be terrifying to
have a part of your own body turn
against you — twisting and burning
with such force.
Like my friend and me, millions of
parents struggle to deal with serious
pain while trying to care for their
children. The immediate thought that
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signs of an illness? “I don’t have time
for this.” How can you keep up with
a toddler, preschooler or tween when
you can’t get out of bed?
There is competing advice on how
parents should navigate these waters,
but the most crucial thing a parent
in pain can do is to reach out for
help. Let someone else take over the
parenting reins when necessary. For
the times when pain is immobilizing,
there’s little choice.
Needing help does not make us
bad parents. Being able to accept an
outstretched hand helps us recognize
the value of our relationships. Our
loved ones can provide not only
moral and logistical support, but also
new perspectives and nudges toward
treatment. In the case of the new
mother with the throbbing headaches,
a friend came to her house and
persuaded her to go to an emergency
room. A medical procedure helped
eliminate her pain within a few days.
Some parents in pain wear a
disguise. They manage to go through
the necessary motions, without losing
their temper, and the child may be
clueless as to the lengths taken to
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us whispers that we should keep our
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Some pain management sites say
that while our instinct is to shelter
our children from our pain, we should
instead talk about it as honestly as
possible. Use simple language, and
speak calmly and quietly. Reassure
children that it isn’t their fault.
Relate it to something in their own
experience, such as falling off a bike.
Tell them you will get better, even if
you’re not sure when or how.
If there is one thing mothers know,
it is our capacity for strength. But
through pain, we learn our capacity
for humility. And when the pain
subsides, it leaves us with a renewed
appreciation for health.
Our children will inevitably
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us deal with ours shows them how to
handle their own.
I vividly remember my mother’s
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bedridden with asthma, laboring
for each breath, I felt an ache in my
own lungs. She did not have to say
anything for me to recognize her
struggle. I could not offer much,
except to lie next to her periodically,
bring her medicines and ask her if she
wanted soup.
It was enough.
Humans — including parents
— need their pain to be recognized,
ideally by someone who cares about
the suffering.
Ŷ
Aisha Sultan is a St. Louis-based
journalist who studies parenting in
the digital age while trying to keep up
with her tech-savvy children. Find her
on Twitter: @AishaS.
A
r. James A. Best was a
well-known and respected
doctor in Umatilla County
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and later in Pendleton. Dr. Best
became a household name in
1913 when he launched his
political career, beginning with
the controversial gravity-fed
water project to bring drinking
water from Thornhollow Springs
to the city.
As the water project was
heading for
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Dr. Best joined
in the race for
a seat on the
commission.
Best stirred
up the current
board when
he charged the
Renee
project’s bank
Struthers
account was
Out of the vault
short more
than $33,000
and implied one or more of
the commissioners was at
fault. The race was fraught
with mudslinging, and Best
was accused of graft when a
contractor working on the project
said the candidate was supplying
his own horse teams for hauling
gravel and demanding to be paid
more than the other haulers.
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to the commission by a large
margin, the other four members
of the board submitted their
resignations and requested a
thorough audit of the books.
Contrary to Best’s allegations,
the audit turned up a small
($1.14) excess in the project
account. The recalcitrant
commissioners were lured back
to their seats on the board by the
fear that anti-gravity men would
be appointed to the commission
and tie up the project before it
could be completed.
Dr. Best’s detractors continued
to try to dig up reasons why he
should not be allowed to sit on
the commission, citing his lack
of U.S. citizenship, among other
things, but the charges never
seemed to stick. Best eventually
gave up his seat on the water
commission when he entered the
race for mayor in 1915.
This campaign also was
beset by strife; supporters of
Best’s main opponent, John
Montgomery, dredged up
accusations that Best was in
cahoots with local bootleggers
and purveyors of bawdy
houses — accusations that Dr.
Best did not deny. The East
Oregonian weighed in against
Dr. Best, running editorials and
political cartoons depicting
organized crime interests using
every tactic (including corrupt
polling practices) to secure their
Dr. Best
candidate’s victory. Special
police contingents hovered at
every polling station to prevent
non-eligible voters from swaying
the outcome. More than 500
people registered to vote the day
of the election. In the end, after
the heaviest voting ever seen in
Pendleton to that point, Dr. Best
was declared the winner, beating
Montgomery by 232 votes, 1,197
to 965.
A near riot followed the close
of the polls. One of Best’s other
opponents for the mayoralty,
Dudley Evans, left the polling
station in the Bowman Hotel to
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results and was followed by
a mostly quiet crowd, though
some of Best’s supporters began
tossing about jeers and threats.
After the crowd returned to
the hotel, Dr. E.J. Sommerville
stirred up the crowd and a short
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to pull their guns to scatter the
crowd. Dr. Sommerville joined
up with another Best supporter,
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George Hotel and there ran afoul
of Chief of Police Alex Manning
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knocked down. Chief Manning
clubbed McComas over the
head and took both McComas
and Sommerville to the police
station. The crowd reformed and
attempted to force its way into
city hall, but Chief Manning
again drew his gun and club and,
with a few well-placed blows,
beat back the rioters. Several
prominent citizens were able
then had never been done. He
immediately got on the wrong
side of Chief of Police Thomas
B. Gurdane, who claimed
the mayor was undermining
his authority and hampering
his abilities to do his job. A
protracted struggle between
Mayor Best, a contingent of city
councilors led by Claude Penland
EO file photo
and Chief Gurdane built up
over several months, ending in
to defuse the situation, but the
March of 1917 with Gurdane’s
crowd did not disperse until well
abrupt resignation and a barrage
after midnight.
of letters in the East Oregonian
Dr. Best next threw his
revealing a sampling of the
hat into the ring for the
mayor’s alleged transgressions
Republican nomination for state
(including allowing illegal
representative in February of
businesses to operate during
1916, another potential step up
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for the aspiring politician. He
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polled a distant third of three
of March 9, 1917, blew up into
candidates in the race.
Best’s time as mayor was also charges and counter-charges
and almost erupted into a
quite contentious. On March 23,
brawl. But again, the expected
1916, Best attended a boxing
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match at the Oregon Theater, a
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ten-round bout between Romeo
when the planned “clipping
Hagan and Ray McCarroll
of the lion’s claws” during the
that lasted only into the second
March 21 council meeting didn’t
round. McCarroll was knocked
happen — the rebel councilors
to the canvas and Mayor Best
appeared to be afraid to speak up,
stood up to announce the match
much to the disappointment of a
would be the last to be staged
large crowd. Dr. Best served as
in Pendleton during his tenure,
Pendleton’s mayor until October
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of 1917, when he joined the war
law. In the furor that resulted
effort as a captain in the medical
from his announcement Best
corps.
“hurled a profane epithet and
Best returned to Pendleton,
obscene injunction” at one of
after serving almost two years
his tormentors that resulted in
in the military, to continue his
the mayor being brought up on
duties as a doctor. Dr. Best was
charges. A protracted legal battle
eventually elected to the Oregon
ensued, ending a year later when
legislature, serving one term as
the mayor suddenly changed his
state representative in 1933 and
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three terms in the Senate, where
$15. He admitted he had broken
the obscenity laws but claimed he his priorities included assistance
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vagrancy; his own search of state He retired in December 1944 due
to ill health and died Aug. 18,
statues revealed it was the only
1946.
law on the books he could be
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charged with on the complaint.
Renee
Struthers
is the
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feathers in the police department. Community Records Editor for
the East Oregonian. See the
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complete collection of Out of
in January of 1916 was to
the Vault columns at eovault.
appoint himself the head of the
blogspot.com
police commission, which until
ODDS & ENDS
Heineken cans beneath it.
Drinking or possessing alcohol is a
criminal offense in the ultra-conservative
Sunni kingdom of Saudi Arabia.
Pastafarian gets to wear
strainer in license photo
BOSTON (AP) — A Massachusetts
agency is letting a woman who belongs to
the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
wear a colander on her head in her driver’s
license photo after she cited her religious
beliefs.
Lowell resident Lindsay Miller said
Friday that she “absolutely loves the history
and the story” of Pastafarians, whose website
says has existed in secrecy for hundreds of
years and entered the mainstream in 2005.
Miller says wearing the spaghetti strainer
allows her to express her beliefs, like other
religions are allowed to do.
A spokesman for the Massachusetts
Registry of Motor Vehicles says policy does
not permit head coverings or hats on license
photos, but exceptions are made for religious
reasons.
Lawyer Patty DeJuneas calls
Pastafarianism a “secular religion that uses
parody to make its point.”
Spirituality bookstore named
Isis gets vandalized
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area store called Isis Books & Gifts wants
the world to know its name comes from the
Egyptian goddess of healing and motherhood
and it isn’t run by terrorists.
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that the suburban Denver shop has been
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probably by people who mistake the name
for ISIS, one of the acronyms for the Islamic
State terrorist group.
The latest vandalism came last weekend
when a store sign was smashed after the
terrorist attacks in Paris that killed 129
people.
The store sells books and gifts related to
spirituality, religion and healing.
“Isis is the name of an Egyptian goddess,
3,500 years old at least, the goddess of
women and healing and childbirth —
basically the antithesis of everything the
terrorists are about,” he said.
Harrison suspects the vandals are “some
ignorant people believing that somehow
the terrorists have a store, a gift store, in the
middle of Denver, Colorado.”
The store has been around since 1980
Man arrested in soap/cocaine
mix-up sues in Pennsylvania
Darrick Fauvel via AP
In this Nov. 12 photo provided by Darrick
Fauvel, Lindsay Miller of Lowell, Mass.,
wears a spaghetti strainer to reflect her
religious beliefs while holding her tem-
porary driver license that also bears a
photo of her wearing the colander.
under the Isis name. He and his wife, Karen,
have owned it since 1997.
Harrison said he’s heard from other
businesses with “Isis” in their names, asking
if they planned to change. He tells them no.
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the name,” he said.
The store has not suffered from the name
confusion.
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uptick,” Harrison said.
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beer disguised as Pepsi
DUBAI, United Arab Emirates (AP)
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they’ve cracked a case — and then some
— of smugglers trying to bring illicit cans
of beer through the kingdom by disguising
them as Pepsi.
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intercepted 48,000 cans of beer moving
through the al-Batha border crossing with the
United Arab Emirates.
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box cutter to open a wrapped 24-pack of the
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York man who spent 29 days in jail after
Pennsylvania state police mistook homemade
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The (Allentown) Morning Call reports
Alexander Bernstein says he had to pay
thousands of dollars in court costs and
missed Thanksgiving with his toddler before
the charges were dropped. He’s seeking
damages exceeding $150,000. State troopers
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Bernstein was a passenger in a Mercedes-
Benz police pulled over for speeding near
Allentown in November 2013.
Troopers smelled marijuana, searched the
car and found packages the driver said was
homemade soap, but tested as cocaine. Lab
tests later showed it was soap.
The driver was charged with marijuana
possession and speeding.
State police declined to comment.
Lawsuit: Amusement park
lets chimp smoke cigarettes
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rights group is suing to get a chimpanzee
named Candy out of an amusement park
where, it says, she smokes cigarettes and is
given soft drinks instead of water.
The federal lawsuit says Candy is in an
inadequate cage at the Baton Rouge park,
and should be moved to a sanctuary.
The Animal Legal Defense Fund sued
Tuesday in Baton Rouge on behalf of two
women who have campaigned to get Candy
moved from the Dixie Landin’ park. The
lawsuit says the women have seen visitors
throw lit cigarettes into Candy’s cage for the
chimp to smoke.
Attorney Carter Dillard says the lawsuit
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that requires captive chimps to get the same
protection as wild chimps.
Park owner Sam Haynes’ attorney, Joanne
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time to read the lawsuit.