Clarence Says Holiday Is for the Birds
By BILL RICHMOND
Of the Reiuter-Guard
Gobbler Thinks Thanksgiving's a Turkey
"So you're glad it's Thanks
giving time?" Clarence asked.
"Well, if you were a turkey
you wouldn't give thanks!"
Clarence had summoned
me, pleading for a chance to
get his message across to the
free world before it was too
late.
"In the first place," Clar
ence said emphatically, "my
name IS Clarence. Not Tom!
Every darn turkey I ever met
was called Tom; I decided to
be different and call myself
Clarence."
"Well, ol' gobbler," I start
ed. "Just a minute," he inter
rupted. "Don't call me gob
bler. That's a very deroga
tory synonym for such an il
lustrious member of the east
ern aristocratic family of
melcagris gallapavo silvestris."
I apologized to Clarence
profusely and said maybe he
had just better tell me his
story and I would sit quietly
and take notes. In essence,
this is what he said:
I (Clarence) was given to
the six-year-old son of the
people who owned this house
last Christmas. The under
standing was supposed to be
that I would be a pet until
Thanksgiving. At that time I
would be . . . well, you know.
But as a loyal and paid up
member of the OTCPTBVAL
TA (Organization to Convince
People to Become Vegetarians
and Leave Turkeys Alone) I
feel something should be
done about the fate of us
fowls.
Just look at the past. Even
presidents of the United
States have been against us.
Do you know what the
first proclamation ol' "fathcr-I-cannot-tell-a-lie"
George is
sued? It was a proclamation
for Thanksgiving.
And how about "Honest
Abe"? He went so far as to
set aside a certain day each
year (the last Thursday in
November) as the day to eat
turkey. Even Franklin D, got
into the act by making the
fourth Thursday in November
the day to butcher and gorge
yourself on us harmless birds.
Speaking of gorging, do
you have any idea what we
turkeys eat? Table scraps!
How would you like to live
on somebody else's leftovers?
Ugh! We never get any deli
cacies like chocolate covered
ants, or bugs dipped in honey
or anything like that.
The only reason they pick
on us is because it was sup
posed to be the meal of the
Pilgrims.
That is strictly propaganda.
The Pilgrims' main dish on
the first Thanksgiving (De
cember, 1961) was roasted
chestnuts and a few lousy
ears of corn they conned
from the Indians.
They always claimed they
ate turkeys to show the folks
back homo in Europe how
well off they were, and didn't
they wish now that they had
come too. You know, like the
people on the West Coast do
to those on the East Coast,
and vice versa.
Just think, I'll never know
what happens between
Thanksgiving and Christmas.
I'll miss all the football bowl
games. I'll never know if the
U of O Ducks (now there
would be a good Thanksgiv
ing main dish) get a bowl
bid.
The man in the houso has
made a couple of tentative
looks at me and 1 saw him
sharpening the ax yesterday.
Don't let me die in vain!
Remember, "I regret I have
but one. . ." No, that's not it.
"Give me liberty or give
me. . ." That's not it either.
Well, I don't want to get
maudlin on you, but do what
you can to further the activi
ties of OTCPTBVALTA. And
remember, there's freedom
of speech, freedom of press
and all that. How about equal
rights for turkeys?
Theatre League Vaudeville
LANE COUNTY'S HOME NEWSPAPER.
SECTION B EUGENE, OREGON, WEDNESDAY, NOV. 21, 1962
130-Acre Industrial Park
Announced at Springfield
By MARVIN TIMS
Of the Kegister-Guard
Springfield's reputation as an
Industrial community was en
hanced Tuesday by the creation
of a new 130-acre industrial park
two miles northeast of the down
town core.
Creation of the industrial dis
trict by the Southern Pacific Co.
was announced at a Tuesday
noon meeting in Springfield
sponsored by the Springfield
Chamber of Commerce's indus
trial development committee.
The industrial park, located
in the vicinity of 28th Street
and the new Q Street, is provid
ed with rail service by the
Marcola Branch Line of the SP
and has excellent access to In
terstate Highway 5.
It will be similar to one that
has been in existence in Eugene
since 1955. The Eugene park,
comprising 80 acres in west Eu
gene, is under the control of
the Eugene Industrial Develop
ment Corp. SP has an adjacent
tract there too.
Formal confirmation of the
Springfield development was the
culmination of about three
years of intensive activity by
the chamber's industrial group
and the SP in first selecting a
suitable site and then setting up
the machinery to acquire the
property.
B. S. Quayle. SP assistant traf
fic manager, Portland, told the
150 Springfield businessmen as
sembled for Tuesday's special
meeting that the SP will now
"work actively to attract indus-
State Planning Official Hails
Oregon's Industrial Growth
Oregon is not in the economic doldrums. Rather, it is now
experiencing a rapid industrial growth, some 150 Springfield
4 businessmen were loin luesua.v iiuuu.
Gerald Frank, member of the State Dept.
of Planning and Development, told the gather
ing that 10,400 new jobs were created in Ore
gon last year and that $50 million in new in
vestments was expended by industrial firms in
the state.
Frank was featured speaker at a meeting
sponsored by the Springfield Chamber of Com
merce industrial development committee tu
hear an announcement that the Southern Pa
cific Co. has created a 130-acre industrial park
in northeast Springfield.
He praised the SP for what he termed its
"fine job in promoting the economic growth of
Oregon."
Discussing the effect of industrial growth in Springfield,
Frank said 100 new industrial employes, each with an average
weekly wage of S88, would cause the following:
A population increase of 338, an increase of $86,000 in an
nual grocery sales and an annual increase of $457,000 in total
rctsil sslcs.
Oregon, he said, has a highy favorable tax structure. "An
nual per capita tax figures indicate that residents in Washing
ton and California pay more than Oregonians.
Frank said a state's tax structure is 13th on the list of
factors that industrial firms use in determining whether to lo
cate in a new area. "Taxes definitely are not keeping industry
out of Oregon," he said.
Frank said, too, that Oregon has 20 per cent of the nation's
standing timber and ranks first in the percentage of interstate
highway completion. "Let us start bragging more about Ore
gon," he said.
Frank
'A Shot in the Dark' Misses
By KENNETH PAYNE
For the Hegtsler-Guard
tries to the new industrial de
velopment."
Quayle said the Springfield
industrial park is the fourth
such development created by
the SP in western Oregon, in
volving a total of 650 acres. He
said the SP has 90 agencies
throughout the United States
staffed with men trained to
promote industrial development.
The assistant traffic manager
said the railroad has a $32,-mil
lion annual payroll in Oregon
and a $10-million payroll in the
Eugene-Springfield area.
During the meeting, Spring
field Chamber and city officials
praised the SP for its industrial
efforts in the community.
Mayor B. J. Rogers, after
praising SP officials for display
ing "great initiative ana cour
age," presented ouayie wun
sterling silver key to the city
the first such key ever present
ed by city officials.
Marty Edberg, member of the
chamber's industrial committee,
outlined the committee's part in
helping create the industrial
park.
Starting about three years
ago, the committee first sur
veyed all existing industry in
the Springfield area and then
published a brochure explaining
the community's features Ed
berg said.
Then the committee filed ar
ticles of incorporation for an
industrial development corpora
tion with the purpose of pur
chasing suitable industrial prop
erty, Edberg explained.
"Fortunately, we didn't have
to go the full route. A member
of our committee, William Pee
bles, (SP passenger agent in Eu
gene) interested his organiza
tion in the industrial parK. ine
SP has now taken over the re
sponsibility of developing the
tract and obtaining industrial
Drosoects."
Jack Maitland, president oi
the Springfield Chamber of
Commerce, who presided at the
meeting, thanked the SP in be
half of the chamber member
ship for the firm's interest in
Springfield.
Vaudeville returned to Eu
gene last night. They called it
A Shot in the Dark."
The Broadway Theatre League
opener was less a play than a
succession of burlesque comedy
routines pieced together by six
curtains and a couple of re
freshing intermissions. It was
vaudeville, all right, without
the jugglers and the acrobats.
The gimmick employed by
the playwright to convert a
comic routine uuu a piety is uiai. uped pace
of a police magistrate investi- piace.
gating a murder. He is the
straight man setting up the
gags for the funny man, or, in
tins case, tho funny men.
One by one, he calls in wit
nesses who wisecrack answers
to his interrogation until the
mystery of who killed whom is
solved. The greater mystery,
why the play was ever produced
in the first place, is never un
raveled. "A Shot in the Dark" has one
of the dullest first acts in mem
ory. Too many people arc talk
ed about; too few who are
talked about appear to be
recognized. After that, It picks
up tempo to crawl in moas-
to a final resting
Meeting
Notices
Tonight
McKENZIE RIVER Chapter,
Order of DeMolay, regular busi
ness meeting at 7:30 at McKen-
zie River Temple, 850 E. 14th
Ave., Eugene. All DeMolays and
Masons welcome.
Thursday
RIVER ROAD Golden Age
Club has cancelled its evening
meeting. Next meeting Nov. 29.
Friday
EUGENE YORK Rite Masons,
Hiram Council No. 7, Royal and
Select Masters, staled assembly
and election of officers at 7:30
m. at McKcnzie River Temple,
850 E. 14th Ave., Eugene. After
assembly, Eugene Chapter No.
10, Royal Arch Masons, will
confer most excellent masters
degree in full form with music.
All Royal and Select Masters
and Royal Arch Masons invited.
Conclave Conflict
Plagues Nielsen
"At least I got a 70-cent
lunch out of it." said Lane
County Commissioner Ken
neth Nielsen Tuesday, refer
ring to a meal he charged to
the Lane County Planning
Commission's account.
He learned the truth Tues
day noon of the old saying
that the last man to learn of
a decision is the man most
intimately concerned with it.
Nielsen is chairman of the
Central Lane Planning Coun
cil, but when its staff learned
he was scheduled for a noon
meeting in Springfield Tues
day, the council's conflicting
noon meeting was cancelled.
Only no one told Nielsen.
Came Tuesday and Nicl
jei saw the conflict on his
calendar. It was decided that
since he is chairman of the
council, he should attend, by
passing the Springfield meet
ing. So Nielsen bought his
lunch Tuesday and proceeded
to a courthouse conference
room for the council meeting.
A half hour later Planning
Consultant Howard Buford
walked in.
He was the one to tell the
chairman that the council
meeting had been postponed.
Nielsen got to his Spring
field meeting 45 minutes
lite.
55-Year-Old
Resident Dies
Clifford F. Sumers. resident of
Junction City and Eugene for
all nf his 55 vears. died Wednes
day at Sacred Heart Hospital.
He had been Hi.
Sumers lived at 2594 Emer
ald St., Eugene. He was born
in Junction City June 13, 1907.
He was a plumber by trade
and belonged to Plumbers Local
No. 481. He also was a member
of the Eagles Lodge.
Survivors include his wife,
Leota Irene; a daughter. Norma
Tcmplcton of Eugene; one
grandchild: a sister, Mrs. Rob
ert Van Duyn ot h-ugene: and
his mother, Frances Barger of
Eugene.
Private graveside services
will be at est Lawn Cemetery,
Friday at 10 a.m.
Fire Runs r
(Runs from noon Tues- J;
7. day through noon Wednes-
: day. , j,
Eugene i
12:28 p.m., Tuesday ..
i 1800 Sylvan St., lint in .
doer on fire. '
2:15 p.m., Tuesday
2193 Alder St., backfire in ;
furnace. f
Springfield
4:38 p.m., Tuesday
Flue fire at 1344 Nancy
St., no damage.
:.aKi-8
Vital
BIRTHS
VALLEY LAVE HOSPITAL
(EUEUIF
rNnv. 20. 1962)
KIDD Mr. nd Mn. Donald Kldd
1800 W. Second Ave., Eugene, a son.
(Not. 21. 1962)
MKDLIN Mr. and Mrs. Herbert
Mcdlin. lit. 1 Box 1586, Eugene,
daughter.
DOWNARD Mr. and Mr. Leon
ard Downard, 548'j W. Flrat Avi
Eugene, a daughter.
SACRED HEART HOSPITAL
(Eugene)
(Nos. 20. 1962)
HOHNSTE1N Mr. and Mr. Nell
Hohnsleln. 2200 1 Patterson Dr., Eu
0jn a rintiehter.
SEYMOUR Mr. and Mrs. Jack
Seymour, 2011 Alder St., Eugene,
HAYES - Mr. and Mrs. Jerry
Hayes. Rt. 1 Box 826, Creswell,
daughter.
(Nut. 21. 1962)
ARMSTRONG Mr. and Mrs. Larry
Armstrong, 510 E. 31st Ave., lugene,
riamrhter.
AI.KORD Mr. and Mrs. mcnaru
Allord, 593 W. Slain Ave., Eugene,
NKWHOUSE Mr. and Mrs. Fred
erick Newhouse, 2222 Sandy Dr., Eu
gene, a daughter.
McKENZIE-WILLAMETTE
HOSPITAL
(Not. 20, 1961)
McNEALE Mr. and Mrs. Donovan
Mc.Neale, 5270 B St, Springfield, a
on.
ROSS Mr. and Mrs. Clifford Ross,
1828 Klntyre St, Eugene, a son.
SMITH Mr. and Mrs. Floyd n.
Smith, 2222 N. 20th SI, Springfield,
a daughter.
DEATHS
SMITH Jn F. Smith, of Rt. 5,
Eugene, died Nov. 20. Arrtnuetnentft
re pending at roo.e-uir.wn runcr.
Home.
ki mf.rk Clifford F. Sumers, 55,
of 2594 Emerald St.. Eugene, died
Nov. 21. Privnie graveside aervieei
will be Friday at 10 a.m. at wen
Lawn Memorial rant
Nine Firms Join
UA Honor Roll
Nine firms and agencies have
been added to the Lane County
United Appeal Honor Roll after
being designated "fair -share
givers" in the current campaign.
They arc Everts' Commercial
Transport, Inc.; Friction Ma
terials. Inc.: Spnnglicici Mu
nicipal Power Co.; Sacred Heart
General Hospital; Lane County
Clerk's Office: M. A. Ward Con
struction Co.: Eugene Truck 4
Machinery Co., and Northwest
Industrial Laundry.
Sound? Great;
Heat? Whew!
Score 50 per cent for the
Broadway Theatre League on
technical problems for Tues
day night's "A Shot in the
Dark Performance."
Sound always a problem
in the past apparently was
no problem at all Tuesday.
Reed Vollstedt, head of the
BTL's house committee, said
he had no complaints from
playgoers about not being able
to hear.
A comprehensive sound am
plification system brought by
the crew of the touring play
was credited with solving the
problem.
But somebody got a little
thermostat happy. The tem
perature in the South Eugene
High School auditorium was
somewhere well in excess of
the comfortable level. Voll
stedt said control of the tem
perature had been left to the
South High maintenance staff.
He promised a cooler time
for all at the next BTL at
traction, "Mary, Mary," sched
uled for Jan. 3. No decision
has been made on whether
tickets for the remaining
three BTL shows will be made
available, according to Mrs.
William Reynolds, publicity
chairman. Thus far the BTL
has sold only a season ticket
"package" for four shows.
Protagonist and star witness
of the play is the accused, a
picaresque heroine whose chief
virtue is her lack of it. She and
her particular talents form the
substance of this Insubstantial
comedy.
Annie Farge, a French im
port known to some as the in
ept but well meaning and de
voted wife in the short-lived
television scries "Angel" plays
that heroine.
Miss Farge tries hard to bring
the play off, as does Robert
Burr as the magistrate. But
Marcel Achard, who must bear
sole responsibility for the origi
nal play in French, and Harry
Kurnitz, who for reasons best
known to himself adapted it,
have stacked too many cards
against them.
Miss Farge is cute, and she
has a bag of cute theatrical
tricks, all of which she uses.
When they are exhausted some
where in the first act, little re
mains. Mr. Burr Is as convincing as
anyone can be who Is asked to
balance the Eiffel Tower on his
feet while standing on his head.
Ho is earnest, likeable and a
trifle stuffy, as he must be In
this particular role.
Joel Thomas as the multiple
syllable banker, employer and
lover of the heroine provides a
succession of laughs during his
stint as the funny man in Act If
while being questioned by the
magistrate.
He is a consistent and con
trolled performer. Mr. Burr's
legal clerk, played by Stanley
Jay, is amusing whenever he
has the opportunity.
None of the other perform
ances could be considered me
morable. One, Freddi Chandler, the
banker's wife, is plain poor.
"A Shot in the Dark" is such
an undistinguished play that no
one will ever know whether it's
possible to give it a distinguish
ed performance. It completely
misfires. If anything really
funny happened last night, it
happened on the way to the
theatre, not in it.
FRENCH ACTRESS ANNIE FARGE IN EUGENE
Hunger Plagues
Actress on Tour
By DON B1SHOFK
Of the RcglsteMjuard
Take a five-foot, 92-pound French actress, transport her to
tho United States, take her on a cross-counlry tour, and what
does she feel most?
Hunger.
"Tho thing I don't like at all. it's the food," said Anni
Farge in the accent that only French actresses speaking Eng
lish are able to achieve.
She was holding forth prior to her Tuesday night Eugene
performance in the Broadway Theatre League show "A Shot
in the Dark." The subject of food arose when she was asked
what she disliked most about the United States.
"It doesn't taste good," was Miss Farge's assessment of six
weeks' worth of food in small American cities. "In the South
ern states, they even know how to spoil an egg," she said.
"I drink milk and take vitamins, and cat fruits things
they can't spoil," she added. "And you should see mo when I
get to a placo like Los Angeles or New York. I head for the
biggest restaurant in town.
"If you travel in France, any littlo village even if it has
only 500 or 300 people, the food's still going to bo wonderful."
Miss Farge, whose hairdo looks as if it was combed with an
eggbcater, has tho appearance of a pixie who might be banned
from fairy talcs for being too sexy.
It's an image she docs nothing to discourage in the hest
tradition of Gaelic actresses. Take her description of American
audiences: . ,
"They react differently In different states. ... It ( A Shot
in tho Dark") is a naughty play a little bit sexy, but it lsn t
indecent. ... , ,
"In some places the audiences are a little prudish they re
afraid to laugh because their neighbor might-see them. But
they giggle all tho time.
"In Texas, they're, a little bit cold and sophisticated. In
California the audiences are wonderful. In, what is it, Lynch
burg? (Va.) it smells terrible they have some kind of a paper
mill there but tho audience was wonderful,"
Miss Fargo descended on the American scene a few years
ago for a one-week visit with her husband (from whom she is
now separated). He was touring as a dancer with a Mary
Martin troupe. ' ' .
"So many thing happened that week. I met (producer) Josh
Logan and Ray Stark a movie producer, and Jess Oppenheimer,
the creator of the 'Angel' series."
Logan wanted her to play tho lead In the movie version of
"Fanny," Miss Farge said, "but I got pregnant and couldn't
d Miss Fargo returned to the U.S. after the birth of her
daughter, took the lead role in the "Angel" TV scries a net
work comedy about a French girl married to an American.
After another 20 weeks of touring with "Shot in the Dark,
Miss Farge, now 25, says she next wants to do a Broadway
show. Beyond that?
The answer came in the form of a shrug, a set of pursed
lips, and the French-accented counter-question, "Who knows
what I am going to want after that?" '
QoYJ I WINS THESE ,
AS SOON AS ALL THE MOTHERS
6ET THEIR KIDS OFF TO SCHOOL,
THEy 6ATHER AT OUR HOUSE TO
fW POOL WITH Wl'MOTHcK
HOU) D0ES'to?r I 0ONT
DAdFEcLABWTI think he
THIS? 2 APPROVES..
tie zOMi0 TAn'T .1MAPN
ni s, wru wrv -
STAY IN THE BOULINS ALLEYS
WHERE THct BfcLUN&f
5. - 1 1 Tv '
r
I CAN'T DECIDE WHICH
TO WEAR ON MY TRIP
-DO YOU HAVE ANY
SUGGESTIONS?
WIGGINS Frank Ford Wiggins,
SO, ol 1MO Piedmont St., Sprtnglie'.d.
I died Nov. 20. Arrangementa art
1 pending at Bums-Frederlcksen Fu
neral Home, Springfield.
I
r .
Sure, wear the sport shirt,
friend. Anything, if you like. The
seasons never change aboard
S. P. & S. It's always Springtime!
For cozy comfort in all kinds of
weather, always travel S. P. & S.
Safe and dependable, too.
SPOKANE, PORTLAND and
SEATTLE RAILWAY SYSTEM
General Offices: American Bank Bldg., Portland. Oregon
For Information Colli
W. Z. Myort, Dl 5-8759
W. C. Bodno, Dl 4-8757
Oregon Electric Railwoy Station