THE OPXG ON STATESilAN, SALEM. OHEGON
that, for b'lieve me when a fellow
makes $60 a week like I do it
takes all his time and attention.
But if you'll only marry me. Ma
bel .r .
; Mabel "Oh, ' Wilbur. I think
you are wonderful. I've always
said these frivolous dancing men
an have their brains in their feet!
Isn't that moon heavenly?"
. Lou -Piper.
.,1 I ' - i ' . ' r
r "Localized
Teacher: "Glenn, what Is an
cient history?" J
- Clenn: "Sis says her engage
ment to Fred Thomas is."
-Mrs. Carlos Kesslere. "
00 YOU KK0V..AVHY -;.-;A : Ma's fJbancB Haver Lasfs Very Long?
Hct CT SOME, j
) jew shoe s
M.1FF. Itt HfwT
PCCJ, THE ct
. 'j. i TUP?"
TO RUM Mt5T
(FOR' SHOE&r
TVitaOuGH the:
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1 ----- . - I
BAIXADE OP SPUING
... By James J. O'Conncll .
Tb's Js the time when poets sing
srf;In sonnet, ode, and roundelay"
About the lovely days of Spring
..When Nature, like a queen of
.Is dressed In ail her colors fay;
But while they sing it is not clear
:Jugt why they should forget to
say
That Spring's a bad time of the
. year. . .
'TIs true birds make the welkin
4 And- buls shoot forth on every
id But what1 are these unto the string
f ,vur trouoie sent along our way
- To- last as long as Spring shall
T Stay? -.- .
Poor man will not be free from
fear - ' '
The while he knows, day after
day, '.- " .
That Spring's a bad time of the
Why should the poet fail to bring
His Muse beneath Truth's gen-
C tie sway; -And
tell us boldly everything
That brings to all us men dls
i5 . may?
j Would that we could escape the
frau. .
But cleaning house again is here,
While tonics for the blood be-
' tray " " .
That Spring's a' bad time of the
year. .
" " ' Envoy '
Oh poets,. list tot me, I pray! .
.The common folks for you will
rheer ; ". ,
If you'll impress, whate'er your
- law.
'V 't ,That Spring's a bad time of the
-. year.
..v" ... . ' T1. I.. .- . V. t'l.. . V
. Everett: "Torn Is a born opti
mist." . . - ......
Arthur: "He sure is. He told
me be thought he could get loan
enough on his overcoat to pay the
thirst installment on a new spring
suit." '. ; ;
Julia Hoffman.
: -.
. Twaa a Bitter Quarrel .
Sally: "You know, Henry, you
should never forget that I left my
home for you." '
! Henry: "I wish you'd do It
again!" . ' ; .. 5
'if
WILD WILLIES
Little Willie, In the yard, !" '
.Pound a can half full of lard,
This he spread from steps to street
His Papa skidded, forty feet.
1 -Rudie Lw
J II ..
Little Willie, after dark.
Loved to wander In the park.
"All the lovers pay me weir '
To keep away," he said, "It's
' 1 swell!" j. :;,,r:' -f
Mrs, Henry Schimmel.
' in'' r : ' -
Willie, In the dentist's chair.
Warned the dentist to play fair;
If it hurts," he ' said, "I warn
you, i
Loving friends will shortly mourn
' - you-" - i- - --
Charlotte Schopf.
. The Idea.
' It was recently told, at a lec
ture, that -when Mark Twain and
a friend were seated 1 in an old
hotel In New' Tork they suddenly
decided to have a drink.
; Mr. Twain was not ' a strong
drinker, but when the' waiter
brought him & fwhiskey and a
small glass of water as a chaser
he waved It aside and -said:;
"What's the use of starting a
fire and putting it right out
again?", V J
1 -:. J. P. M.
ScCect Society
Davis: ' "Armstrong never goes
about mucjv what . set does he
mingle with?", -
Wheeler: "I don't know exact
ly, but I think It is one of five
tubes." : . , Alma Mueller.
VV SHOP MOVIEH
The Men GlrlM Marry
Keel 1..
(Scene:, A dance floor)
Mabel: "Isn't that music heav
enly? Isn't this floor wonderful?
Oh,- Mr. Stepper,! you dance love
ly! I'll never marry anyone but
a dancing man." ,
Stepper: "Yh Pers'n'ly I'm
engaged to an out-of-town girl."
. Reel 2
(Scene: Outside the Cafe de Jazz)
Mabel: "Wasn't that floor
heavenly? Wasn't that music won
derful? I could die dancing! . Es
pecially-with you. Burton. One
thing I've made up my mind to ;
the man that marries me must be
a perfect dancer."
Burton: "Zat so? j .Will ; you
walk home or shall t we take a
street .car? ':. J , !
iicei 3 : ?"; V. ' -
; j(Scene the Cotelighta front.-
porch. Moonlight.) t C ' j-.
Wilbur Stick; : "Of course I ad
mit I ain't' got no airs and graces,
like a lot o guysr ; I can't play
cards or dance.- or nothing like
MM
EL BMER
specials for
Saturday! :
i
Affl'lScBrdad
03
Rye, Whole Wheat, Raisin
and White
Ms 20c:
Vanilla, Strawberry and Orange Flavors
Your Choice 20c Each
A delicious marmalade filling
Scmcthinn ncv arid different
Cross Word Limericks
1. What Roste O'Grady was. 2.
What makes a defense necessary.
3. What thinks, therefore Is. 4.
What a good cbaperone has done.
5. The way. an elevator gees when
It isn't going up.
.- Alice Lake.
Speak. Up, Boys!
A ( lT gir 1 of rather large
' ' girth, . '. .
Who lisped from the (2) of
her birth, - , . ;
Asked her - -(3) when he said
- That, he wished she would
(4)
"Do you (5) me for better or
'worth'?". . . :
. 1. What we- would all like : to
be. . 2. What. -precedes and. follows
night; 3. A: delightful thing for
any girl- to have .4. What hav
ing No. 4 often leads ' to. 5. A
verb very commonly used.
i Lena Krauae. ,
i . 1-.'-: a .
I !!' t " i i''i.IH-1, ' i1. 1" !' ' a, ;7T? i.;t . ,;
MONOfN AM
TUHSDV AM
-
' mi il i.kli i i il ll . i. . I.
TUUB50fN EVEN1WG
! SCOTTS MILLS
I
? Mr. and Mrs. Albert Rich, Mr.
and Mrs, - Almond Rich and Mr.
and Mrs. Arthur Rich and daugh
ter, Mildred, attended a meeting
of the North' Howell Community
club held at North Howell Grange
ball - Thursday, evening. A good
program , was given by . the club,
also speakers from OAC and Dr.'
Walter Brown, director of -tbe
Marlon county. child health clinic.
C. D. Hartman was In Salem
Friday, on business.
C T. Doty of Hubbard .visited
friends at Crooked Finger the past
week. :
Mr. and Mrs. O. H. Brougher
are visiting Mr. and Mrs. J. Barn
es in Salem. Mr. Barnes has -been
very ill the ; past two ' weeks with
blood poisoning.
Mrs. C. D. Hartman and Mrs.
W. - T. Hogg attended the state
Convention of the Royal Neighbors
which was held in Albany Tuesday
and Wednesday", They both went
as delegates, and reported paving
a fin time.
Mrs. M." Waibel, who has been
visiting her son, John Waibel and
family at Willamina, for the past
three weeks, has returned to her
home. -
A meeting was held at the
Crooked Finger school Thursday
evening. A speaker from OAC
spoke on farming and dairying.
Misses Beatrice Amundson and
LaVerne Rich, students at U of O,
are spending their spring vacation
with their parents here.
- Miss Doris Hogg visited with
her sister Loraine, Saturday and.
Sunday in Salem. :J
Mr. and Mrs. Almond Rich were
in Salem Saturday on business.
A large delegation of tbe Re
beka lodge here attended the dis
trict convention held at Silverton
on Saturday, all reported having
a splendid time.d
, Quite a number from here have
been to the Sandy for smelt.
Levi Kellis made a business
trip to Portland Saturday.
Mr. and Mrs. A. L.. Brougher,
and. fon, Ira, visited Mrs. Brough
er's brother, Mr. J. Barnesc and
family In Salem Sunday.
Silver Foxes From Canada1
Finding Homes in England
LONDON'. March 25. British
farmers are watching with much
interest te experiments which are
being made here in an. effort to
make silver fox,farmiag in Eng
land a paying proposition.
: Farms have been started at Al
ness, in Scotland, and Oxfordshire
and Bexhfil-on-Sea. What effect
this move' will have on "the price
of silver for fur in Great Britain
cannot at present be stated, but
It has been proved during the last
15 years that the best and most
costly examples of the silver fot
are those of animals bred In cap
tivity. The foxes have been
brought here from Canada.
Read the Classified Ads.
n n n n;-wiRP
J S Lb- U: U U U U VSJ , ML :
Ouly Two Mcure' Days Friday and Sattarday
D)
PA
vac
rw o
5 T7: .5
in) - 9 fil
Tl 9
. - t f .
GET A PAIR OF THESE HIGH-GRADE SHOES FOR HALF
lAJ o ivM foavo b ' ffloBir-lPirlGQ Qaffe ait iMiie 'end nf edoUd motiit'ci
ito itafiG caco of ohoirit BScdQb Sad gmf MQ-Qwado GitrDo,
s
Repciir
Pep
ar tment
Our' shop i3 equipped with all new machinery. We use
nothing but the very best grade of leather that money will buy..
, llr. Jacobscn, in charge of this department,1 is an expert
in hla line- has spent years In factories and repair shops and will
do nothing but hih grade work.
Stats
ttrgk&ttods
Corns and callouses removed without pain or soreness.
Ingrown nails removed and treated.. Pains in feet, weak-foot, flat
foot, foot strains and fallen arches adjusted. Do not suffer.. I
will give you the best that science can produce in scientific
chiropody. Consult
About Your Feet. Hours 9 to 5:20. Phcne 616
You will like them - - - Just try ens
226 ZliXCL-rzlZLZZzl
r-